Why Success Doesn't Feel Real | Josh Groban

0:00We just confirmed that Andrew Huberman is coming to the Summit of Greatness, along with some other amazing speakers. We've got Dr. Tara Sward, Brendan Burchard, Gabby Bernstein, Amy Purdy, and some huge entertainers and performers. Make sure to get your tickets right now. Summit of Greatness is happening September 12th and 13th here in Hollywood. I can't wait to see you there. Hi, my name is Lewis Howes, and welcome to The Daily Motivation Show.

0:35when has been a moment in your career where it was like the biggest success was happening but you felt like you were at your lowest place mentally emotionally physically did you ever have those feelings or moments where it's like man i'm crushing it like to the world but internally i feel like i'm really struggling you know i i'm sure i could pinpoint a couple of those but honestly that has happened more off more more times that i could actually kind of say that there have been moments where i have been going through my own uh mental health journey on stage really that is so polar opposite from the experience that the audience is getting um i know you're going through it are you expressing it no so you're just in your mind going through it i can tell you now that i have distance from those evenings that i was crushing it that the shows were great and in those moments there have been times where I can't even like talk to anybody for like an hour after the show because I'm just I'm in this like shame spiral of self criticism that is can go so deep that has nothing to do with the reality and I think you know I talk to a lot of performers and people that are that have high pressure performance jobs, whether it's in the arts or sports or whatever.

2:01And there is a certain place that is like an adrenaline place or whatever it is that your your fight or flight that your brain has to access so often when you do that many shows that sometimes the nights where you're crushing it the most are actually the ones where you're kind of on the fringe a little bit and your your vulnerability is kind of taken a hit and you're you're feeling a little too wide open and there's a lot of stuff that's coming in and there's a lot and that means that there's some darkness that comes into and so there have been shows where um i have had to get out of my own way to enjoy what i've what i've just done but i also have a tendency sometimes to when i step off of a stage and it's like there's like two different people when i'm on stage there is something i can tap into that really knows how to ride the wave and ride the energy that's happening up there and work the stage and then i've just for better for worse i've never been one of those people that can take the party back off stage with me i i i have so much jealousy for those artists that there is an after party and it's like let's keep celebrating what this whole thing was man yeah let's have drinks and let's talk about how great the night was and let's talk about how you know and i've just never been i've just never been that person what happens for you typically after a performance kind of like a battery overload like shutdown mode it like like drained you i go into low power mode interesting and i and i it is has trained me a little bit i think that there's a not a small part of it that has to do with um protecting from disappointment or maybe it wasn't quite the way i thought it was out there or maybe i read a few you know too many negative things when i was younger and it just taught me like, ah, don't get too high after a show.

3:45Stay right here, you know? Interesting. But for whatever reason, I've just always, I've always let out everything that I possibly have to give out there. And then afterwards, I just don't let myself celebrate it too much. Wow. And, you know, that's still something I need to work on. Where do you think the self-criticism or self-doubt comes from?

4:09You know, it's hard to say. I had the most supportive parents. I've had the most supportive parents I could possibly have. I always thank my teachers when I'm on stage. I had supportive choir teachers, theater teachers. I was lifted by a lot of people early on in my life that I have the most thanks for and always give thanks to those people. I don't know. It could be you know that I was just a very young 16 year old when I had to do very heady things yeah the music that I was singing at a young age was not like a 16 year olds like emotional music stuff no it wasn't fun it wasn't like it wasn't light and peppy and poppy it was like serious business and I was singing for you know audiences that had lived a life that I had not lived yet and singing hard music.

5:05I had no pyrotechnics or dancers or anything. It was just, hey, this kid's gonna, you know, blow your mind with this high note, you know? And it was, if I wasn't feeling good, I just, I think that it was just because it was hard. It was harder for me than I think I was ready to do. I still did it because I had a certain amount of natural talent that I was able to push through anyway, but I hadn't caught up yet technique-wise and emotional-wise and just life experience-wise. And so I think it just kind of baked into my psyche a certain level of always teetering on the edge of this might not be, this might not stay.

5:41You know, this is, they're going to be on to you. At some point, they're going to be on to you. And so, you know, there can be a lot of trappings when you're just blowing a lot of hot air and you just think you're the best all the time. I think that there's, I've seen a lot of people get into trouble that way too. Sure. I had the other extreme.

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6:58Again, have an amazing day and I'll see you tomorrow with another episode of the Daily Motivation Show.