Be This Kind Of Person | Ask DS

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1:51Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, where each day we read a passage of ancient wisdom designed to help you in your everyday life. Well, on Thursdays, we not only read the daily meditation, but we answer some questions from listeners and fellow Stoics who are trying to apply this philosophy just as you are. Some of these come from my talks. Some of these come from Zoom sessions that we do with Daily Stoic Life members or as part of the challenges. Some of them are from interactions I have on the street when there happened to be someone there recording. But thank you for listening, and we hope this is of use to you.

2:33Be this kind of person. In matters of law, Cato was a stickler. In matters of principle, Cato was uncompromising. His opponents found him exhausting. Even some of his friends thought he was impossible. Yet as we wrote recently, people who bumped into him in the street were always surprised by how nice he was, by how low-key he was. There was the man who struck Cato in the baths, not aware of whom he was fighting with, only to be unceremoniously forgiven by the great Roman he'd assaulted. There were the local dignitaries who didn't notice the powerful politician in their midst, and were politely reminded that future visitors might not be as easygoing as Cato.

3:11Again, few would have described the meticulous Cato as low-maintenance, but in an important way, which is to say, ironically, in unimportant things, he was. And we should follow this example. In a world of Karens, we must get better at shrugging our shoulders at messed up orders at restaurants. In a world of endemic understaffing and labor issues, we must be patient with customer service, including the folks who work at Daily Stilic. They're doing the best they can. Coming out of the logistical and supply chain crisis of the last few years. We have to get better at waiting, at dealing with delays, at not getting instant gratification.

3:50Antoninus was a powerful example for Marcus Aurelius in this regard. Marcus saw his stepfather running for the office of consul, actually earning the votes that the emperor could have simply demanded as a matter of course. He saw him going into the private homes of his friends like an ordinary citizen. He watched Antoninus joke around and be joked about. He watched him deal with a frustrating customs agent, as if he wasn't all-powerful and above such inconveniences. He watched him go about his life without much fuss or entitlements. It doesn't matter who we are, what our job is, how big our bank account is, how prestigious our family is.

4:26It doesn't matter how much we paid for our ticket, how much in the right we are, or that the customer is always right. A stoic is low-key. A stoic must be patient. A stoic must be forgiving. A stoic acts respectfully, but does not demand respect or special treatment from anyone.

4:56Hey, it's Ryan. Welcome to another episode of the Daily Stoic Podcast. I have the incredible honor of being invited to address all of the employees in the Austin public library system back in October of 22. If you haven't been to the new library that they put in downtown Austin, it is incredible. It was, I mean, it should be incredible considering what they spent on it. It was very delayed and very over budget, but I mean, just even the room that I was speaking in was pretty epic. I think the whole talk is up on YouTube. I'll make sure I link to it in today's show notes, but this is me answering some questions from one of my favorite groups of people in the world, librarians.

5:39They're doing the Lord's work, certainly here in Texas, where they're fighting all sorts of censorship and meddling and just nonsense from people who watch too much Fox News. Different story. That's neither here nor there. Here is me answering some questions on stoicism, writing, and book banning in Texas. So I guess not really another story. Thanks for having me out, APL, to your staff development appreciation day. And I'm excited to share a little snippet of our Q &A. Do we have time for a couple questions? Yeah. All right, let's do it. Fire away. I've been to a bookstore. Yes. Thank you. It was great.

6:18I didn't know that was a bookstore. Oh, awesome. It's my sister and son. And it's a beautiful space. That part of that shop is so cool anyway. It's a beautiful space. And I was just struck going in there about how just what you said makes sense. Every book in there is a curated collection. Every book was struck by the Chosen War of Reason. And I was struck by that Marcus Aurelius being in there. Oh, thank you. Yeah, I mean, it's funny. People go, oh, we want to support independent retailers. I want to support some big multinational conglomerate like Amazon. But the truth is most bookstores just buy their books from publishers, which are multi-billion dollar conglomerates, and distributors like Ingram, which are multinational conglomerates.

7:10And so we just decided, like, let's dispense with all the pretense of that, and let's just actually carry books that we like, right? Like the first thing that happens when you start a bookstore is they go, here's the suggested list of books that you should order from us. and that just seemed like what's the point right if people want access to any book they should go to the library or all books they should go on amazon but if you want to be recommended something that maybe you wouldn't have otherwise thought of a lot of the books the painful part about owning the bookstore is like we get books that the publishers aren't prioritizing because they don't sell thousands of copies a year we have to wait for them or ask for reprints of them But if you want a book that we have actually read and that I think could change your life, that's the idea.

8:04It's like I want to carry books that have the potential to change your life or be one of those books that you go, this is one of the best books that I ever read. Yeah. So, off the cuff, if you could make one improvement, if a public library could have innovation what would your progress be and what do you see as the absorbable strengths of the public library as it works i'll start with the second part i mean if i'm thinking about what strengths public libraries have it's the space right it's the land this is some of the most valuable real estate in austin this is some of the most beautiful architecture in austin it's the space and as stuff increasingly becomes digital physical space has a premium in a different way that's one of the things we thought about in opening the bookstore too which is like again if you're looking for a specific book you're probably just going to grab it on the internet if you want to explore if you want to be exposed this is the place to do it one of my favorite novelists is john fontaine this book called ask the dust which is maybe the greatest novel ever written about los angeles um and that novel i wrote a story about this a few years ago that novel came out as published by a small publisher and then it was lost to obscurity for somewhat strange reasons lost to obscurity because his publisher also simultaneously in 1933 publishes a english translation of mein kopf and hitler sues them for copyright infringement and wins in U.S.

9:48federal court and bankrupts the publisher. And the book loses its marketing budget. The publisher basically goes under, and the book is lost to history. Except there is one copy in the Los Angeles Public Library, and Charles Bukowski is wandering around there one day and finds it. He says it's like finding gold in the city dump. And this is the height of Bukowski's fame. he brings the book back John Fonte enjoys this resurgence in the last couple years of his life the book sells millions of copies it's made into a very mediocre movie with Colin Farrell but it's a book that never would have had the second life were it not for a library and the physical space of the library and what connections and events and discoveries can happen inside a library and to me that's the magical thing about these places anyone else go for it do you ever read out loud to my children yes i read out loud all the time i think it's wonderful and fun and then i read my own audio books which is not so wonderful and fun and generally makes me feel like a babbling idiot by the end of it and i am reminded talking about, you know, finding things you could use.

11:14I am constantly reminded as I read my own audiobooks how few words I myself have ever heard out loud and thus have no idea how to pronounce them. I learned them reading and have to look them up on YouTube or whatever to be able to pronounce them. But I love reading out loud. It's, you know, such a great sort of family connection. I don't like listening to books as much, so I prefer to sort of quietly read Cologne by myself. Hi. So, well, first I was going to say I really appreciate your books. I really appreciate a lot. Oh, thank you. And modernizing stoicism, I think it's amazing and wonderful.

12:01As someone who works here, I was pleased to see if you had any idea of how we could incorporate stoic philosophy and these things that really kind of fit a lot of the slides into programming or events or things that the community can involve in? That's a great question. I mean, obviously I think all the time about how do you take philosophy which most people think they don't need or are not smart enough for, and then how do you take stoic philosophy, which has this negative connotation of being an emotionless invulnerable robot, and how do you make that practical to people? My first book on stoicism, The Obstacle's the Way, I probably say the word stoic or mention stoic philosophy like all of three or four times.

12:49Because I was very conscious of the fact that it had this sort of headwind. And so I wanted to present philosophy as a solution to somebody's problems as opposed to an academic discipline or an intellectual thing. So I think one of the best ways you can popularize stoicism is not by talking about stoicism itself, but talk about Greek examples of people acting in accordance with the philosophy or showing that philosophy is this accessible, usable thing. So I tried to do a kid's book, these two kids' books on stoicism for that idea. Like, they don't need to know the names of these people or the historical facts or any of that.

13:37they just need to see that like actually hey yeah when your brother steals your toys from you you don't control that but you control how you respond to that and so I've tried to think more about the substance the actions of stoicism and demonstrating it that way but I guess I guess I would try to start there and then you know I think Gladiator is a great movie and I think like finding ways into these i think the reason when someone said hey you should read marcus aurelius and hepatitis the reason i went and picked up marcus aurelius first is that i remembered him as the old guy in the movie gladiator and so i i i try not to judge i try to go where people are and try not to judge what their entry point to those things is and so with daily stoke we spend a lot of time you know posting inspirational poets on instagram and making uh youtube videos and wheels and stuff on tiktok because like i love books and when i want to learn about something i i think i should go read a book about that um that is not how the vast majority of people think about things they think about wikipedia or they think about social media they think about videos but that can be the entry point to that thing and i know that because i talk to so many people go you know marx aurelius was the first book of philosophy i've ever read they'll tell me that one of my books was the first book that they have read since high school and i love that i think our job should be getting people into the ideas by whatever means necessary and whatever entry point you know is as accessible to them as possible but i love that you're thinking about that and however I can help just let me know.

15:25Anyone else? I know what you mean about you can't step into the same river twice and how that relates to a book. The first time I read The Confederacy of Dunces, I thought it was a laugh out loud funny and I would recommend it to people and then like 10 years later I read it and I thought it was a satisfying. I think it kind of relates to like, and I think about that a lot and I like, and I haven't been ready to read it again, because I was like, what if I don't think of this? Yeah, you know, it's funny, because Ignatius Riley is a loser, and it's funny because he's not aware that he's a loser, and it kind of depends on how, do you relate to him as a loser, do you relate to him as someone who's better than all the people?

16:09I think it depends on where you are, but I was actually just thinking of this the other day, because as we've sort of seen downtown Bastrop and revitalized, little new things have happened, and then a guy started a hot dog cart on the corner. And I was getting a hot dog one day, and I was like, you know what, stay right here. I have a book for you. And I went, and I got him a Confederacy of Dunces, which I was so excited to be, because like you, I thought it was the funniest book of all time. And then as I was handing it to him, I was like, I hope he's not insulted. Like, I hope he's not... And it is interesting.

16:40These books operate in different contexts, and depending on where you are in your life at that moment, you get something totally different out of them, which is also why I think this idea of banning books that make us uncomfortable or challenge us or are controversial or inappropriate or whatever is so dangerous because what you see in it might be radically different than what other somebody else sees in it. Once you start that process, that's what Fahrenheit 451 is. He has this great, very politically incorrect passage in the book that I won't repeat, but he He goes, we banned these books because this minority group was offended.

17:18And we banned these books because this minority group was offended. And the result is there was no reason to read anymore after they got rid of all those books. And so we never step in the same river twice. And then also everyone else is always stepping into their own river and their own version of the river and coming to it at a different time. And I think we have to have a lot of empathy and openness and patience with that. But I do think, I still think Confederacy comes and folds up pretty well and it's pretty fucking funny. Thank you guys very much. We really appreciate it.

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