How Astonished Would They Be? | No Shame In Needing Help

0:05Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, where each day we bring you a Stoic inspired meditation designed to help you find strength and insight and wisdom into everyday life. Each one of these episodes is based on the 2 ,000-year-old philosophy that has guided some of history's greatest men and women to help you learn from them, to follow in their example, and to start your day off with a little dose of courage and discipline and justice and wisdom. For more, visit dailystoic.com.

0:56How astonished would they be? It was the furthest thing from his mind. In fact, it was the opposite of what he was aiming for or what he valued. The idea that people would one day read his meditations, that it would be studied thousands of years later, was inconceivable to the man writing for himself, a man who believed that posthumous fame was meaningless. And yet, can we imagine he would take some quiet satisfaction in the legacy his words left behind? That the accidental byproduct of his private reflections would be a source of strength and wisdom for millions? It pleases me to think, Marilynne Robinson writes, It's how astonished old Homer, whoever he was, would be to find his epics on the shelf of such an unimaginable being as myself in the middle of an unrumored continent.

1:45Marcus would have been astonished, if not temporarily horrified by the publication of his unedited thoughts. But just as much, he would have been astonished by you. The restoration of the republic, not just in America, but in constitutional democracies around the world. that we have gotten closer, as he hoped we would, to a society of equal laws governed by a quality of status and speech and of rulers who respect the liberties of their subjects? He would appreciate the interconnectedness of today's modern world. He would love that the philosophy that was already ancient in his day has continued and remains an ancient yet living philosophy to us today.

2:23He would love that people are still passing along Epictetus just as Rusticus had passed Epictetus to him. It is astonishing, this world we live in, and it is a gift, this philosophical tradition we carry forward. Let us be worthy of it.

2:49Thanks to Toyota Trucks for sponsoring this episode. When I bought my ranch in 2015 out here in Bastro County. I drove my car about halfway down the dirt road that we live on, thought this isn't going to work, stopped, parked it, walked the rest of the way home, borrowed my wife's car, drove into Austin and bought a truck. What I bought was a Toyota Tacoma. And this truck wasn't just transportation getting me to and from my house. It unlocked a whole different style of living for us, not just on the ranch, but in our little Texas towns. There were places I could go now that I couldn't go before, especially out here in the piney forests, through the fields, and on the unpaved roads like the one that I lived in.

3:34We got to go deep into the hill country's wild beauty. We've driven all the way out to East Texas. We've driven across the country. And by we, I mean not just my wife, but both my kids who I drove home from the hospital in that truck. Toyota trucks are built for those who understand that the best adventures happen when you're willing to veer off course, because you never know when you'll end up on a Toyota adventure detour. And of course, this is stoicism, too, because every detour, every obstacle is an opportunity. But it's helpful if you can handle the difficulty inherent in that. If you've got the resilience and the right companion to make it wherever the road takes you.

4:13Discover your uncharted territory. Learn more at toyota.com slash trucks slash adventure dash detours. No shame in needing help. This is the June 16th entry in the Daily Stoic. 366 meditations on perseverance, wisdom, and the art of living. You can grab a premium leather edition. You can grab signed editions at store.dailystoic.com. It is fitting, I guess. Today is my birthday, June 16. that we are going to be quoting one of my absolute favorite quotes from Marcus Aurelius, all-time favorite quotes. Marcus Aurelius says, don't be ashamed of needing help. You have a duty to fulfill just like a soldier on the wall of battle.

5:04So what if you're injured and can't climb up without another soldier's help? So what? That's Marcus Aurelius' Meditations 7-7 You know what? I like this quote so much I'm going to give you the Hayes one As well, what is that? It's a 7-7, so let me give you 7-7 from Hayes Hayes says, don't be ashamed to need help Like a soldier storming a wall you have a mission to accomplish And if you've been wounded and need a comrade to pull you up So what? Let's grab the Robin Waterfeld one too Let's see what he says about it. There's no shame in being helped because you've got to do the job you've been set, like a soldier storming a city wall.

5:51Suppose you had a limp and were unable to scale the battlements on your own, but could do so with someone's assistance. Right? So what? That's what he's saying. And the reason I love this quote so much, and actually let me get to the meditations first. No one ever said you were born with all the tools you'd need to solve every problem you'd face in life. In fact, as a newborn, you were practically helpless. Someone helped you then, and you came to understand that you could ask for help. It's how you knew that you were loved. Well, you are still loved, and you can ask for help from anyone. You don't have to face everything on your own.

6:28If you need help, comrade, just ask. Look, the idea here and why I love this quote so much is it flies in the face of this stereotype of the emotionless, robotic, superhuman stoic that cannot ask for aid, cannot rely on anyone that is an island. You are not an island. That's what Marx really said. No, you're part of a phalanx. You're part of a troop, a brigade, a battalion. And you're all in this together, protecting each other, helping each other. And in fact, to not ask for help, to just lay there and to give up is not just weak, but cowardly, right? You have to be able to ask for help. There's a great book.

7:14I've read it to my kids a million times called The Boy, the Fox, the Horse, and the Mole. We sell it at the Painted Porch. If you haven't read it, even as an adult. Promise you, you got to get this book. But anyways, there's a passage in the book. He says, asking for help isn't giving up. It's refusing to give up, right? Asking for help isn't weak. It's a sign of strength. You're not afraid of being seen as weak. You're committed. You're unbeatable, right? You will not go down without a fight. And you're willing to do anything and everything to keep going, including asking for help. So I don't know what you're going through.

7:49I don't know what's going on in your life. I don't know what you're struggling with, but you should not be afraid to ask for help. You should ask for help. Asking for help is important. I talk to my wife about this sometimes, like, or be at a store, and she's just looking all over the place for the thing. And I go, there are people whose job it is to help you. And in fact, by going and asking that Home Depot employee to show you something, that's like one box that they don't have to lift. You're giving them purpose and something to do, right? By asking for help, you are giving other people the opportunity to feel and do good.

8:23Think about it that way. Like when your friends ask for help, are you like, oh, this fucking guy? No, you're glad, right? When your siblings ask for help, like you enjoy the opportunity. So why would you think that other people would judge you or think critically of you or refuse you help? They wouldn't. So don't be afraid to ask for help. Don't be afraid to show weakness or vulnerability. This is a good thing. and I hope that you do it. This could be therapy. This could be opening up to a spouse. This could be opening up to a parent, to a loved one, to a friend, could be to a total stranger, could be just asking for directions when you're lost.

9:00Don't be afraid to ask for help. It is not unstoic. And in fact, to persist in ignorance or error or uncertainty because you are afraid of looking foolish, well, that is to miss the point of stoicism, as Epictetus says. If you want to improve, You have to be willing to be seen as foolish. I'm not saying you will look foolish by asking for help, but you have to get over that fear of what other people will think to ask for and get what you need. So please, please do it. Appreciate all of your support here at Daily Stoic. I'm going to go have some fun on my birthday. So talk to you tomorrow.

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