Want To Capture The Magic? Do This | Impulse Control

0:05Welcome to the Daily Stoic Podcast, where each day we bring you a Stoic inspired meditation designed to help you find strength and insight and wisdom into everyday life. Each one of these episodes is based on the 2 ,000-year-old philosophy that has guided some of history's greatest men and women to help you learn from them, to follow in their example, and to start your day off with a little dose of courage and discipline and justice and wisdom. For more, visit dailystoic.com.

1:09style without any complex philosophical jargon. Unlike most books, there's no pretense, no performance, no intent to impress an audience. It's filled with topics that are universal and relevant, dealing with tough times, being nice to people, waking up and getting to work even when you'd rather stay under the warm blankets. And yet, so many people struggle with and get frustrated by Marcus Aurelius' meditations. And they have ever since it was first discovered after the emperor's death nearly 2 ,000 years ago. Just as we can imagine the first reader of meditations trying to make sense of the private thoughts of this great man, today people have questions about where to start and what to take from it.

1:51What translation should I get? Should I read it cover to cover or is it better to approach it in bite-sized pieces? Do you read it once or multiple times? Where did Marcus write it? Why did he write it? Did Marcus mean to come off so dark or dour? Is it important to know about Marcus's circumstances? Who he was writing for? What he meant? Do you need to know the core principles of Stoicism to fully appreciate meditations? We've been working hard here at Daily Stoic for the last decade to try to make Marcus really successful and practical for people. We even published our own edition of Meditations.

2:24But we've also spent hundreds and thousands of hours, not just with his writings, but also with the best experts and translators and students of Stoicism to help make sense of what he meant and what he can do for us. Getting to the bottom of meditations is the work of a lifetime. And as Marcus would say of any great work of art, you get something new each time you go to it. Well, that's why we've been putting together what I think is the perfect companion for reading and understanding Marcus Aurelius' meditations. It's this new daily stoic meditations guide, like a book club or an annotated version of your favorite book.

2:58It's designed to be your personal roadmap through the nuances, subtleties, and complexities of Marcus Aurelius in meditations. Whether you've yet to journey through the pages or you're intimately familiar with them, this awesome course will enhance your reading experience, deepen your understanding, and show you how to apply the same stoic principles and exercises that Marcus Aurelius used to improve his life to improve your own. It's not spark notes or a summary. There's no substitute for reading meditations. It's not a shortcut, but it's a guide that will help enhance your understanding, help you really get everything you should get out of it, and hopefully guide you not just to read it once, but time after time after time.

3:38I'm really excited for you to check it out. Go to dailystoic.com slash meditations, click it in the show notes. And also I would say if you haven't read meditations, do grab our edition. We sell it in the Daily Stoic store, the Gregory Hayes edition, but I added some awesome graphics to it. There's a biography of Marcus in there. It's leather, so it'll hold the test of time well. And I'll link to that in today's show notes as well. We just took our kids to an outdoor performance at the Nutcracker. They had a snow cone and then they went insane in the car ride home. And one of the things I try to remind myself when that's happening is that I don't control my kids' behavior, especially when they're too far gone like that, but I do control how I respond, right?

4:21That's stoicism, but it's also what Dr. Becky talks about. Dr. Becky is a clinical psychologist and a best-selling author, and she founded Good Inside, which is there to give parents practical, actionable tools for handling those everyday challenges with confidence. My wife introduced me to Dr. Becky's books. I love them. I've recommended them a million times. I've had her on the podcast. And as it happens, Dr. Becky is hosting two live Q &A events for Good Inside members. I am one of them. She signed me up for it about a year and a half ago. I've loved it ever since. On December 1st, you can join Dr.

4:58Becky for her How Not to Raise Assholes event, which is about avoiding entitlement and raising kind, empathetic kids. And on December 15th, she's hosting her How Not to Lose It Over the Holidays event, which I'm sure we could all use. As I said, I'm a big fan of Dr. Becky. She's been a great influence for me as a parent and just as a human being. And Daily Stoic listeners can join for 15 % off with code STOIC15. You just got to head over to goodinside.com to catch the events.

5:38If something is making you upset, write it down and look at it. What happened? Who caused it? Now think about your reaction. What did you say? What did you feel? Did this make it better or worse? Marcus Aurelius' emperor clearly had many people and causes to be upset. He also had real power and authority. Even so, we find that he would tell himself, you have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength. So too with what has happened to you. You did not control what happened, but you do control which impulses you will follow in the wake of it. And this is this week's meditation in the Daily Stoic journal titled Impulse Control.

6:24I do hope you check out the journal. It's a little journal I do every morning. We have three quotes here that go along with it. Epictetus says we must discover the missing art of ascent and pay special attention to the sphere of our impulses, that they are subject to reservations to the common good, and that they are in proportion to actual worth. It's Marcus Aurelius' meditations, 1137. I just love that you have Marcus Aurelius quoting Epictetus. You say good fortune used to meet you at every corner, but the fortunate person is the one who gives themselves a good fortune, and good fortunes are a well-tuned soul, good impulses, and good actions.

7:03That's Marcus Aurelius' meditations, 536. Frame your thoughts like this. you're an old person. You won't let yourself be enslaved by this any longer, no longer pulled like a puppet by every impulse, and you'll stop complaining about your present fortune or dreading the future. To me, journaling is just such a great way to do this exercise of impulse control. I usually do it in the morning, but you could do journaling at any time. But I think, what are you upset about? Why are you angry? What are you holding on to? What's that thing inside you that you really want to say to that person? Say it on the page first.

7:45Anne Frank talks about how paper is more patient than people. Sometimes I find that the thing that I was writing down, I hadn't quite worked it out yet. And if I had said it the way I was thinking on the paper, it would not go well. Or I find that having said it once, I'm done. I don't need to mention this to anyone. It's probably better that I keep it to myself. So to me, journaling is really a way to work out some of those urges. Just because you think something doesn't mean you need to say it. You need to develop this emotional impulse control, but that doesn't mean you just stuff it down and you don't deal with it.

8:22You got to deal with it on the pages in the journal. That's the idea. You let it out. It's a place to do some spiritual combat, but it's also a place for your ideas, your competing impulses, your competing opinions to battle themselves out, to fight for that limited space. So spend some time with your journal as therapy. That's what it's there for. And if you're not taking advantage of it, chances are you are just taking those feelings out on other people or you're taking them out on yourself. And that's not a good way to go through life. So use the journal as an instrument of impulse control.

9:00It's gotten me out of trouble time and time again. I can think of a moment when one of my books was coming out and I got sort of royally screwed over by a journalist. I wouldn't even say screwed over anymore. Let's just say someone did something to me that was quite unethical and quite petty and annoying. And actually the prompts in the Daily Stoic Journal, it caught me. It was like three prompts in a row. I didn't rush into saying something. I was going to wait a few days. And at the end of the three days at the end of the journaling, kept it to myself. And even now, I don't need to tell you the specifics.

9:31I've moved on and it saved me some headache, probably saved me creating an enemy for no reason. And then I can move on. And I hope you can do the same.

9:44Hey, it's Ryan. Thank you for listening to the Daily Stoic podcast. I just wanted to say, we so appreciate it. We love serving you. It's amazing to us that over 30 million people have I've downloaded these episodes in the couple of years we've been doing it. It's an honor. Please spread the word, tell people about it. And this isn't to sell anything. I just wanted to say thank you.

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