Christy Primmer | Radical Responsibility & Rebuilding Your Mindset

27:09Absolutely. Because if you, if you have some, some issues in a marriage, which every marriage has issues. Oh my God. If someone says like, oh, marriage is perfect. You're a fucking liar. Get out of my face. You're not even human. No, no, no, no. We all have issues in our relationships, even friendships, even business partnerships. It doesn't matter. no one is the same person. We think of things differently and we see things differently. So it's like, but if I want to fix something in my marriage, I'm going to try to do what I can. And too many people are trying to control that other person or that other entity or variable in their business or whatever it is.

27:50And they lose all the time because they haven't held the mirror up. That's right. Like that's all you need. Now you may have seen the buzz, but let me give you the inside scoop. Babe Ruth, Barry Bonds, Ken Griffey Jr., Mark McGuire, all the greats. What do they have in common? They have collectibles and they're being sold on Whatnot right now. And it brought me back to my childhood. Knowing that I can get my hands on something cool like that really gives me hope. So if you're selling online or out of a storefront, full-time or as a side hustle, you already know the challenges. You're hoping for people to find your listing or waiting for them to walk in.

28:25Whatnot flips that right on its head. On Whatnot, you go live and sell directly to people in real time. They see what you've got, they ask questions and buy, and they keep coming back. Whatnot is the largest dedicated live shopping platform, whether it's beauty, collectibles, electronics, luxury fashion, or heck, even cookies. Sellers are building real thriving businesses. Anyone can sell, whether your business is big, small, or yet to exist. People selling on Whatnot sell 10 times more than on other major marketplaces. That's because you're not just listing products. You're building real connections with buyers.

29:02Search whatnot, W-H-A-T-N-O-T in the app store, download, and you can start selling right away. And you know, one of the things that I do this in my own life, I always joke that Anthony's had custody of me since I was 24 because I've been with him since I was 24 and I'll be 47 this year. So that's a long time. So I, you know, I say that half jokingly, cause I'm like, if something's wrong with me, blame him.

29:31But no, in all reality, what I do is I visualize people, how I want them to receive me. So like if there's a person I've had a conflict with, I will visualize that being resolved easily, or I will send them love. And And it's not always easy to do, you know, like some people have really hurt me or deceived me and I pray about it. I'll, I'll try to visualize it. But when it comes to like my marriage, I have an amazing marriage, but it's taken a lot of work and certain seasons of my marriage haven't always been hunky dory, you know? Yeah. And they shouldn't be. Same with parenting as your, as your children age, like we only have one child, he's 25, but I mean, we parent differently.

30:15So, I mean, there's so many things. And then business, that's a whole other thing. People that, you know, are always late or they don't do what they say they're going to do or, and then you have to navigate that, but you have to do it. What I like to think is with class for yourself first, because it goes back to that energy, right? You don't want to be upset with something going on in other areas of your life and then pollute your home life. Yeah. Right. You said something interesting. how I want someone to respond to me or perceive me. Yes. Receive me. You know, and that all comes from energy.

30:50That all comes from being intentional in the, in the words that you speak, but also having, I already said energy, but having that warm feeling when you're approaching somebody, even if that relationship's bad, they can feel it. they can say, Oh, okay. Christy isn't coming at me with that energy right now. This is actually okay. Then you find that common ground and things can improve that way. It's safer. Yeah. Absolutely. And it's like I said, it's not always easy, but I'm also very mindful of who I associate with. And, and I mean, believe me, I've learned the hard way. I thought I had people figured out and then I'm like, Ooh, I didn't see that coming.

31:28Yeah. Um, and sometimes it's like, wow okay next and sometimes it takes some time to really like process it right because i don't want something someone else did to affect my trust issues with other people yeah because that other person shouldn't pay for that person exactly yeah i mean like come on yeah you know i always look at too is like is what even though that person did something to me or i'm perceiving it that way what part did i play exactly what was your role was my role you know you know and it's crazy because in this business and when i say this you're gonna be like yeah a lot of that shit happens Oh, every minute, every second.

32:03Like there's a lot of times when people say like, man, that must be great. You know, you're on top of me. First of all, we're not, um, I'm never done. And the other thing is, is something is always happening behind the scenes. You're always being undervalued, overlooked, scoffed at, um, mocked, mocked, compared chats about you. I mean, bring it on like crazy stuff. Right. Yeah. But it's also like, okay, like you said, you know, I have to pay attention to what circle I'm placing myself in or what I'm allowing in. And every single time I can go back and I can go, that was my part in it. Like that, you know, that was my part.

32:45I should have exited this community in this way. And so I'm just like, dude, I'm just going to roll out. Yeah. And you should be able to do that, by the way. You should never be gaslighted for not sticking with someone's community. It's like if someone left my$45 community, cool. Yeah. It should never be an issue. It shouldn't be right. But people take that shit really seriously. Cause they need to heal. They have a lot of work to do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We'll say that. But I just, I just think it's, it's an interesting, you know, this industry, it can be very dirty, you know, whether it's, you know, you, you know, the podcast, TV, PR, like that whole game, like everything is.

33:25The modeling industry that I'm in. That's insane. That's insane. Oh, I modeled recently. I saw that. What the fuck? Actually look good. Isn't that crazy? Oh my God. New York Fashion Week. Come on. I know. We're going to do it again. We're going to do it again in the fall. I love that. But like, and it's funny, but my daughters, they, they want to be in fashion. They want to have their own company. They want to move to Paris. And so I better haul ass. I mean, cause they're, you know, seven and nine, like my goal by then is to be able to fund it. Well, and you're showing them through your everyday life that they can achieve their dreams.

33:55Yeah. So come on, dad. I mean, yeah, I gotta, I gotta get on it. Right. But it's such a beautiful experience at the same time, because the more you learn, the more, you know, it's like you can navigate things much easier. Right. It's like, Hmm, there's the problem. I know I can find that solution over here and then you go get it and then you implement it. And then you just, you're able to grow in ways that never thought was possible. Like I remember in 2024, we hit a million listens for the first time. And it took us until November, you know, November to do it. And I remember once we hit it, I was like, oh yeah, I did a post, right?

34:41It's a million. Cause I thought it was a lot. And now what do you think? It's not. Well, even just, if you look at like, you know, I mean, again, at that point, I wasn't playing the comparison game. Yeah. For us getting to a million for annually, that was big, you know, and so it was 2024. And I remember once we hit it, I was super excited and I did the post and it was like, all that dopamine next day. I was so freaking depressed because then I, because you know why? Because the fun part was the chase. Yes. The thrill of it. Once you learn to stay in the chase, celebrate your wins, but stay in that hunt because that's where you're built.

35:24And so in 2025, we did close to nine mil. This year we're pacing 12 and a half to 13 mil. That's amazing. There's some, there's some shows that do 13 mil a month and that's okay. Yeah. It's okay. I think too, one thing I just, I want to highlight everyone I've shared your podcast with, it's the realness of this, you know, and, and coming from trauma counselor background to going back into the modeling industry and the media industry. And even as an author, there's so many people that are like forgetting what it actually took to get there and forgetting that they can shift and change and be proud of every single milestone.

36:07Yeah. You know, I love that. And thank you because, you know, Dan tells me all the time. Look at this. This is amazing. Grateful. Yeah. Right. Super grateful. And you're helping people. I hope so. That's the goal. That's that, that's, that's the purpose behind this. Right. And I think that's why I've been able to stay kind of where you're at. It's like whenever you share the show with someone listens to it or sits down in that chair for the first time. Yeah. Like your experience today is going to be light years different than it was four years ago. Right. But it's like when people come and they sit down in that chair for the first time and we have this conversation, they're like, what just happened?

36:44Like I've been on big, that was my favorite thing I've ever done is because we have the real conversation and we get down to the root of the human experience and that's what is needed. I don't care. Oh, desperately. I mean, I don't care what country you live in. We have forgotten to love one another. I'm only giggling because our country, Canada really needs a lot of help. Well, walk me through that though, actually. I mean, because that's interesting to me because from what I know of Canada, it's the exact opposite. it like so i mean because it was i think this is a i think america is beautiful i love america i love my country but it's a fucking cesspool right well times that by 10 or maybe 100 and that's canada it's you know it's i always bite my tongue because i come from a military family background and i'm i've been a i'm a proud floridian for six to seven months of a year yeah you're sober that's what you are.

37:44I'm a sober. And for 16 years, you know, I've been coming to Florida and our country in Canada, I live in Ontario, but it's just gone to the shambles. I mean, it's, it's hard to explain, but the racism is at an all time high. I'm not even kidding. I live like three hours West of Toronto and it's insane. Stabbings every day, shootings every day. And this, this is like stuff that never happened. Like we just had our massive school shooting out in British Columbia. the first school shooting in 40 years and people are still saying that everything's going tickety boo and that you know things don't need tweaking i'm like no we have a problem we have a problem you know it's funny not funny but it what what to me is comical is that we don't get that stuff here we don't hear the news in canada really right we hear what the media outlets want us to hear.

38:41Yeah. Right. And so we don't get that worldly news. My wife grew up in Ecuador. Oh, wow. Yeah. She, um, you know, that is awesome. I didn't know that. Yeah. Well, she was born in Puerto Rico. I knew that, but I didn't know she grew up in Ecuador. And then I think at three, I mean, they're Ecuadorian, right? Like a hundred percent Ecuadorian. Her dad was in Puerto Rico working. He was an executive for, I think, Citibank. Okay. And then And they ended up moving back to Ecuador when she was two or three. The whole point is, is that when they would watch the news, they would actually get a neutral reporting of the news from worldwide.

39:13Okay. That doesn't happen here necessarily anymore. You might get international news, but it's whatever that outlet believes the slant is. And I don't think that's real reporting. No. And it's kind of messed up. And that's what drives the engine of racism. Yeah. You know, dividing countries. Ignorance. Absolutely. Yeah. And Canada actually put a ban. We can't access certain media anymore. What can't you access there? Like certain news outlets we can't access. As soon as we come to, well, what I love about coming to America is I get American Netflix. It's way better than the Canadian Netflix. Really?

39:50Sorry, but that's true. Oh, wait. We have to wait months, sometimes years for what you guys get. American Netflix here is fire. I bookmark everything I want to watch as soon as I get to the States. But yeah, there's just certain bans. And I think people are afraid to have conversations. And, you know, one of the reasons I get asked all the time, why do you go to the state so much? And I say, because I love it. The diversity. Everybody, everybody matters. And a lot of Americans I talk to don't always feel that. But from an outsider coming in, that's what I see. That's how I see it. That's interesting.

40:24Because like I said, I was like, wait, are you sure? Because that's what I hear. I hear the opposite about Canada. But we don't, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, but, but again, I'm going to take your word for it. Obviously I trust you. There'll be Canadian listeners that will say, no, she's not telling the truth, but I am. And sometimes the truth is hard. But, but the truth is different for everybody, right? Cause they may not see it. Yeah. And they may not be in the tax bracket. I am in my money going to things that I don't support and believe in can be very frustrating. Oh yeah. And you know that, right?

40:51I do know that. Yeah. I know. Being in a certain tax bracket sucks. Yeah. You think it's cool. And you're like, oh, I know that. Yeah. Like, that's not fun. Yeah. It's like, damn, I missed the W2s where I was just going to take it. And I get both. I get dinged by both because as a property owner in the States and then work and stuff, I always claim my, you know, my accountant does it. I don't do it. But anyways, it's like a double whammy. But, you know, I wouldn't change it for the world. I, I loved to come. I love to go home. Our weather is beautiful in the summer, but the palm trees, it's the palm trees for me.

41:23So you're in Clearwater, right? Winter Haven. Winter Haven. Oh God. Winter Haven is beautiful. Winter Haven. Yeah. Holy shit. County, whole County, baby. So it's funny. Cause when you, when you texted me the other day, or when we were going back on message back and forth on messages, trying to figure out what day you're like, no, cause I have this and it's three hour drive. I'm like, Clearwater. I'm like, oh, she must be in Orlando. But Winter Haven, that's beautiful. Yeah. Beautiful. I love it. Pretty cool. Huh? Yeah. Pretty cool. It's a 16 years. We've seen a lot of development. But I just love it.

41:56It's, it's like, well, it is home. It's home for us. You know, seven months of the year, it's home. Well, it's home. I mean, like it's, it's, it's, that's the majority of the year. Yeah. That's, you know, there's, I wish it was more sometimes and we're working on that. Well, yeah, you'll be able to figure that out. Yeah. Eventually be here full time. Yeah. It's right here. So, you know, the more I see it in my mind, it's eventually just, it's my reality. Well, that's it. Right. And you, you see it and then you feel it emotionally. Right. And that's when it. Feeling it. That's. Sorry to cut you off.

42:26No, no, go. No, because that's the thing that is missing. A lot of people talking about visualization, the secret. But they miss that. If you can't feel what you'll feel like in that situation, you're never going to have it. Never. It's just, you know, I've experienced it firsthand. So I know it's just the way it is. Because your mind thinks it can't achieve it. You saw what I put out today, right? No, I haven't. Oh my God. So two days ago, my friend David Walde came into town. We did an episode in person. We did an episode probably two years ago, but I've known him for about three, three and a half years.

43:05And, um, he pulled out his note book, his like little remarkable notebook, right? Okay. Where you can save all the notes to the cloud. It's all that kind of stuff, you know? And he's like, Hey, do you remember the conversation we had? Our very first conversation we ever had. I'm like, no. And he had it? He had the notes. Wow. And we did this exercise, you know, basically rating my happiness on a scale of one to a hundred. I scored a 38. Oh, wow. I was just, it was the hardest point that I feel I've had in probably, you know, 10, 20 years. And, you know, there was no joy. I wasn't happy. I didn't feel I was, you know, close with God.

43:50And I felt like my marriage was fine. like neither one of us wanted out but i just like i don't feel as connected as i should i want to be able to be more you know not again i don't want people to think i wasn't connected to my wife no i get what you mean but anyone who can think yeah it was well who knows the fucking trolls out there oh he hates his wife they're so angry at themselves yeah they're idiots yeah but um but i wanted all these different things like financially i was scared of losing everything. And so I scored myself a 38 out of four out of a hundred now. So, and I was very overweight, right.

44:28And, um, the other exercise he had me do was close my eyes and think about what does my ideal version of Sean look like? What is he wearing? What is he doing? So I went of me is wearing tight black jeans, a tight form fitting black shirt and black and white shoes with red accents. And he's like, okay, do you remember what you said about your appearance? I said, yeah, I was, was in great shape. You know, but she said something specifically. I was like, I don't, he's like the vascularity in your arms that day. and he's like oh and you also went and said what type of car you drive i'm like okay well hit me with all this yeah he goes you know hit me with the clothes and he he's like look at your outfit i had a tight black shirt on short sleeve tight black pants in the exact shoes yeah that i described which were all purchased after i forgot about that that conversation i was like what the hell is going on?

45:42He goes, yeah, you said you were speaking on stage, top 20 show. That's where we're at. And he goes, is that your TRX out there? I go, it is. He goes, yeah, that's what you said you're going to buy. Wow. Now you may have seen the buzz, but let me give you the inside scoop. Babe Ruth, Barry Bonds, Ken Griffey Jr., Mark McGuire, all the greats. What do they have in common? They have collectibles and they're being sold on whatnot right now. And it brought me back to my childhood. Knowing that I can get my hands on something cool like that really gives me hope. So if you're selling online or out of a storefront, full-time or as a side hustle, you already know the challenges.

46:21You're hoping for people to find your listing or waiting for them to walk in. Whatnot flips that right on its head. On Whatnot, you go live and sell directly to people in real time. They see what you've got, they ask questions and buy, and they keep coming back. Whatnot is the largest dedicated live shopping platform, whether it's beauty, collectibles, electronics, luxury fashion, or heck, even cookies, sellers are building real thriving businesses. Anyone can sell. Whether your business is big, small, or yet to exist, people selling on whatnot sell 10 times more than on other major marketplaces.

46:57That's because you're not just listing products. You're building real connections with buyers. Search whatnot, W-H-A-T-N-O-T in the app store, download, and you can start selling right away. and it's because i felt it yeah you know and i didn't know how and you let yourself feel it yeah i mean like i i'm a big feel person people say don't chase feelings i love feelings i'm gonna chase the shit out of them see i want to cry i want to laugh i want i want goosebumps everywhere my kids always make fun of me in the truck always does a song come on i'll say quiet and then it's like yeah oh daddy's feeling it again he's got the goosebumps shut up like But they'll love that about you later.

47:41Like I, I mean, they say love it, but they just, they tease me. But, but like, if you aren't chasing feelings, then you are not feeling anything. And how can you ever create something? Exactly. And even like, I just want to, um, shift it to like, of course, marriage, family, and our appearance and all those things, but your business, like people would say to me, oh, you've got this TV show and you've got this and that, and I'm like, yeah, Yeah, but I could do all of that and still not be feeling, you know, the best or into the next step of my vision. Because I have a big vision for my life. And obviously you do too.

48:15And a lot of our listeners do. Right. The people listening right now, they all they're like, yeah, they get it. But it's like when people can step back and say, OK, this hasn't been working for me. So maybe these feeling things aren't so crazy. Yeah. And woo woo. Maybe it is the secret ingredient in this recipe of creating my dream life. Yeah. Imagine. I mean, imagine that, right? But I mean, it's crazy because like I, at a younger age, I never under, I mean, I didn't understand it. I made fun of it because our coaches would put us in right field. You'd have your bat in your hand, lay down. I'm like, why am I laying down on my bat?

48:54Close your eyes. Envision the pitch. Envision the count. Are there runners on base? What's the situation? A lot of times they give us the situations, runners are on second base. What are you looking for? Yeah. And we have to visualize it. And I was like, man, this is the dumbest shit ever until I got into a game and I'm like, oh fuck, this already happened. Yeah. And then recall. Yeah. I was like, oh wait, no, the situation is runner on second. There's nobody out. I'm not bunting because maybe the guy behind me doesn't have a strong, a strong bat. So I'm looking for something to go the other way with.

49:30So I'm looking at her third. I'm talking baseball. I love it. I played baseball for 18 years. You're a pitcher. So it's like, it sounds silly until you do it faithfully. Yeah. That's the key word though. Faithfully. And this is what people don't understand. People understand they go, okay, faithfully means consistently. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. So faithfully meaning you're doing it and you have the utmost faith that it's going to work without any evidence of it being true. Yeah. And, you know, and that just made me think of something. I was talking with someone and they had said to me, faith is also preparation.

50:14So, yes, doing the work and the faith part of believing and feeling it, but being prepared so you can be that person that has the things you want to have. And sustain it, which you had said earlier. I want you to go back. I want you to repeat, be the what? The person with faith in preparation. So you can be the person who has the things that you want and sustain it. You know, the reason I want you to repeat that, be the person who would have all those things. Yeah. Is because you ain't going to get anything that you want until you become that woman, that man, that person. I've learned that the hard way many times, Sean, you have to be her.

50:58I have to be her to have what I want. The only way that I'll tell you, everybody in this room that I hacked the system on because I wasn't him. Yeah. Is when I met my wife. I wasn't the person that should have even attracted at that point her. Now, Dan's probably sitting over there. This is bullshit. because you've always been a great dude. You've always been a great dad. You've always been someone that has a lot of value, but, but like, it would make sense now, but she saw something in me, right? There was those elements, right? But like when we talk about, you know, a lot of times people say like, I, I don't have the relationships I want, or I can't get the girl or the man that I want.

51:48So many people are looking at what they want in somebody, but unwilling to look at who I need to become to attract that. That's right. So quick, funny story. When I met my husband, I had a checklist of everything I wanted. It was like, did you literally have it written down? I did. He's here. He can attest. When he, when I finally was convinced. She pulled out at the dinner and was checking that shit off. He took almost three months to get me to even have a coffee with him because he wasn't my type. I mean, he's gorgeous, brown eyes, tall, you know, all these things. I love him to see those beautiful browns.

52:22He does. Sexy man. And I mean, you know, there was that, but I had it in my head. I had like all these goals and all these things. And I had been through such heartache and such horrible, horrible relationships that I'd made this big checklist. And so when I finally met him for coffee, I said, here's my checklist. This is everything that I'm looking for. And I want you to go home and make a checklist. And I know it sounds so weird. I mean, we've, this is our 20 year of marriage this year. This is transaction. I should, you know, Sean, I'm a little over the top. Hey, it's okay. You've, I mean, listen, I love that about you, but it reminded me the other day when I was on this software program, I was like, Hey, do I buy the, do I buy the basic or do I the professional?

53:01And it's like, well, there's a checklist. Like, no, I, I need all that. Like I have it written down here. I got it. That's so funny, dude. And do you know what the one thing was on the checklist that he wasn't a jock. And then I talked with my parents and my dad, who's been gone, this is 12 years now, but my dad said to me, well, how's that jock thing been working out for you, young lady? And I said, oh, you know, they're so dreamy. And I mean, he's an artist. He's a brilliant artist. He was a high school teacher, very smart man. And I thought about it and we'd reconnected and And I said, you know, I figured I'd never hear from you.

53:41I brought a checklist, you know, he was like, no, that actually was so impressive that you knew what you wanted and what your focus was and what your boundaries were. And, um, I have mine and you fit all of them. And we've been together ever since. It's just so awesome. It's so weird. Our son's always like, oh my gosh. How is he doing? He's doing amazing. Well, he just had knee surgery, third knee surgery, but he's gearing up for baseball season. So he's healing. That's great. He's getting married in August. I did know that. I didn't know he was engaged. He's doing amazing. He's the first aircraft mechanic engineer with Herb's Palsy in North America.

54:15I don't know if you knew that. Did you know my son had Herb's Palsy? No. Caused at birth? No. I don't even know what it is. It sounds crazy though. It's caused from brachial plexus injuries during delivery. And so because of the tears and damage to the brachial plexus, it affects the hand all through the arm. So he's got a bit of a palsy. He can't lift his arm up. No way. But he's an incredible. He's, he's doing everything that the doctor said he couldn't do because that is the strong, how strong my faith is and seeing my son doing these things. So when I'm telling your listeners about see yourself, do it, feel into it.

54:48I did that over my baby. Like it's, it's mind blowing and it's kooky, but it's true. You know, it's, it's so funny because, uh, you know, over the last couple of days, you know, I told my wife and I had our wedding anniversary. I saw that. Congratulations. Thank you. We were at dinner and I told her about my conversation with David Walde that day and about everything three years ago that I've freaking created. Yeah. And she goes, it's pretty cool. And, and then I said, you know, I'm going to take Friday to myself. Oh, well maybe you can do it. No, no, no, no, no. Let me, let me explain to you what I mean by myself.

55:25No, like, no, I'm not doing anything until you guys get home. but like for me you know friday is going to be you know maybe i go i'm gonna go to workout obviously but maybe go get a massage but then you know what i'm gonna do i'm gonna connect and do that exercise again because it's clear to me that i need to read up that and again it's not that i i don't have my my targets yeah but i haven't sat with them yeah exactly i want to sit with them again. And the reason why I want to stay on this topic and I'm bringing up this visualization because, you know, there's people listening right now that may not really understand what the hell we're even talking about.

56:08And I, and I appreciate it, right? Because not everybody's a visionary, not everybody's a manifesting generator. Okay. They may want to be, but they don't understand how to do it. And so, you know, back in what, what was it? 2000 and Maybe six, seven, when The Secret came out, like right here in that era, right? Yeah. Rhonda Burney. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that came out and everybody was making vision boards, which, which I think are a very, very effective strategy if you do it the right way. Yeah. Right. And, and for the audience, I'm going to get to the right way in a bit, but you know, all these different things that you want in your life, but there was a, there was a massive component missing to The Secret.

56:53Cause I fell into it and everybody else that I knew fell into it. So everybody was thinking about what they want, put on the movie screen of your mind, movie screen of your mind, movie screen of your mind. I want this car. Cool. I can see it. That's it. You just visualize this car and then people are like, oh yeah, then a Ferrari shows up on my driveway. Hold on. Yeah. I wish. That Ferrari may have showed up at the driveway 10, 13 years later after they executed the plan. Right. And so when I say vision boards and the law of attraction and visualization done the right way, it's really, truly getting quiet and fighting through the noise in your mind and seeing it.

57:32And again, like I said before, feeling it and then letting it go. Yeah. You can't focus on it. No. I love that you're going to do that for yourself. I'm actually going to check in with you in a week and just see how that week or how the whole process goes. but you just does something like feeling it and, and letting it go. And one thing I know for myself and thought I've worked with thousands of women and men, I've had the privilege of working with thousands of people throughout my career. And the one thing that's always been common is not letting it go, right? You fixate. Why isn't it hurt? Why isn't it here?

58:05Well, she got it. He got it. Come on. How come it's, it's not here. And you know, like my car I rolled up in today, my dream car. Beautiful vehicle. Thank you. Thank you. Um, I knew that shit. I knew you guys were in that young version of me would never have been able to afford something like that. So it's, it's just, I'm so proud of, of being able to afford it on my own, but that was like three, four years in the making. And I had on my screensaver of my phone, you know, my husband's here. You can attest to this. I had this car and it was a CLA. Okay. So anyways, three, four years go by. Finally, I'm like, you know what?

58:37I'm turning 40. I'm going to buy myself this car, go test drive the CLA. I'm like, I love it. I love it. I love it. My husband goes, no, look at that car over there. And I said, oh, that's like$50 ,000 more. That's the one. He's like, well, just test drive it. You know, sometimes my husband influences me to do really bad things and they're amazing. Anyway, long story short. No, honey, go spend another 50 grand more. That's the car you want. Yeah, long story short, I test drove it and I looked at him and I was like, hot damn. Yeah. This is my car. So we roll back up to the dealership. I said, I'm going to put this amount down and finance the rest and toodaloo.

59:14Yeah, it's badass. ask. Have you ever, that was years. My point is that took years for me to actually have it in my, in my laneway. Yeah. You know, driveway, I guess you'll say. Yeah. They call it laneways up. Laneways. Really? Interesting. I know. And then everyone looks at me like, I live in a small town in Ontario. Um, but to, to your point, like it takes time. Yeah, it sure does. It's funny because have you ever looked, have you ever thought about everything when you were a kid, right? And all the dreams and aspirations you had, whether they worked out or not, or what you wanted in a partner, obviously, and what you wanted out of life.

59:52Have you ever done a full, like retro active audit? Like, did I actually attract what I want? I've done that numerous times. Again, I'm, I'm, I'm a very big journaler and self-reflective. I'm very much an introvert, believe it or not. I need a lot of alone time. I recharge alone. I can get lost in books, writing. I do that a lot more. People never guess that about me because when I'm on, I'm on. Yeah. But I'm very reflective. Okay. And I actually just did that half a year ago, a little more. And that's when I said to myself, come on, girl, get your shit together. I love it. Like take accountability.

1:00:33It's so funny because all the good things and all the bad things I attracted into my life. Yeah. I've attracted some bad things. I've attracted some stuff. stuff. I remember in 05, 06, worrying about losing everything because of real estate bubble. And I was in mortgages. Yeah. And then I did. And then I look back, like, you know, what was the one thing that I wanted, right? If I had a son, I was like, my first child is going to be a son. It's going to be my boy. And my mom and my grandma and her brother and her dad, they were in a car accident when she was six. Oh, wow. My mom and my grandma lived.

1:01:16My would-be uncle and grandfather both died. Oh, wow. I'm so sorry about that. Yeah, it's crazy, right? Oh, that's heavy. No, it's real heavy. But my grandfather, his name was Bobby Lee Doster. Okay. And he was a baseball player. He was a catcher. And he was born in 1932. My baseball number was 32. I had no idea. Completely unrelated. You didn't know. I had no freaking clue. Wow. I can tell you that story later too. But, but, but my point is, is like, I remember looking at this picture at my, I think my mom had her, my grandma had it. I can't remember which, but it was me feeding a squirrel and I was dressed like weird.

1:02:02I mean, my, I mean, my mom dressed me weird when I was a kid. I'm like, I'm like, that outfit was freaking weird. I looked like a complete dork. I'm like, I got slacks on. I had a mushroom cut. Okay. no dude i had a mullet and then the vanilla ice lines and i was ball players and kids such a g it's back now i mean jamie upstairs has a freaking mullet i mean it's like it's like a cool thing my son has a mullet see baseball harry says yes it's well it's a base it's a it's called a baseball cut now yeah i try to get bob my son to do it i'm like dude get a mullet bro he's like he goes no i'm like dude it's a baseball cut it's like what about bryce harper cut he's like no i'm like dude this is but anyway but it's so funny because um I was looking at him like why am I dressed like that and like why is it black and white they're like because it's not you I'm like yeah that is me they're like no that's your grandpa and so when that gave me truth bumps yeah it's crazy and like I always wanted to be a third baseman or a pitcher well when I turned 11 my dad's like the way your body's structured and the kind of situation you have going on you have a great arm but you're going to be a catcher.

1:03:03And I didn't want to do it, but he was a catcher. Okay. Right. And so into a point where in junior college, his friends would come watch me because they were still around. And they said, we could not tell the difference who was playing. It's the same dude, right? My whole point to this is that's the connection with everything, right? And that day that they both perished, that name died. The Doster name died. wow right so i said when i have a son i'm naming him boom boom boom and anybody that i dated and got serious with they had to be okay with that and then my first child was a boy i named him boom boom i love it and um i remember always wanting a latin woman check check you had a You just didn't know it.

1:03:59Just didn't know it. Cause you think of these things and the whole, the whole, the whole point of the, of the rant is we're always manifesting. Absolutely. Always. Always. This is part of who we are. Whether we're conscious of it or not. It's part of who we are. Yeah. You know, you can say universe, you know, God, I believe God in the universe, same dude. Like for me personally, it's like, you know, I, I, I believe in Christ and like, he's the universe. He's the creator of everything. It's everything. Yeah. It's infinite intelligence everywhere. And so I just always like to tell people is like, you don't believe in this?

1:04:32Like, no, I go, have you ever like thought of something like really bad? And then it happened. Yeah. I go, that's attracting. Like we're magnets. Yes. And you know, it's so important to have the things that you want to create the top of your mind all the time. But the biggest component is like, like I said earlier, like you reiterate is release it. Yeah. Go do something. Go do something. Right. Yeah. Think about it. Feel it. Know what you have to do. Right. Of course. Like, who do I have to become? Like we've, we've been on this. It's no question that me and you get on this fricking topic, dude.

1:05:10Jesus. But, but it's like, you know, you don't have to think about the complete how. Yeah. And I think that's where people get stuck. Yeah. Because it's like, well, how do I do this? Yeah. Sean, how do I grow a show? I don't know. What do you mean? I don't know. I'm like, I don't know. I'm not you. Like I know how I did it. You might be way better than me. But how you did it probably wouldn't work for someone else because it's not a one size fits all. Yeah, exactly. So it was like, you know, think about the things that you want to create in your life and live a good life and be responsible, but also like dive into the hard shit because that's what makes us.

1:05:50And stop avoiding it. You know, like how old do people have to get? before they realize, wait a minute, maybe if I take radical responsibility for myself, every faucet of my life will improve. Yeah. Every single one. Yeah. Every. But that's the point, right? It's like when I decided to go all in on me, I became a better husband. I became a better father. Now I have my moments. We all do. I had one on Sunday. We all do. Right. Fucking big one. Right. I may have one on the drive here. I'm kidding. I mean, hey, you recovered quickly. That's good. He's over there hiding in a corner. They're sad. She's going to beat me.

1:06:25Well, you know, my AMG goes fast. I got to police them a little bit. Yeah. But I mean, like, look, it's all about, I guess, holding yourself, like I said, accountable for those moments and like really communicating why you feel you reacted that way. But again, we don't want to react. We want to be able to respond. Yes. Then I heard the other day that if you get, I hate this word, triggered, but if something comes up, it's a 90 second thing. Yeah. Hold on for 90 seconds. And if you don't freak out in the first 90 seconds, the odds of you freaking out or saying something stupid and damaging a relationship with a loved one is very, very slim.

1:07:05Yeah. 90 seconds. Now, you may have seen the buzz, but let me give you the inside scoop. Babe Ruth, Barry Bonds, Ken Griffey Jr., Mark McGuire, all the greats. What do they have in common? They have collectibles, and they're being sold on WhatNot right now. And it brought me back to my childhood, knowing that I can get my hands on something cool like that really gives me hope. So if you're selling online or out of a storefront, full-time or as a side hustle, you already know the challenges. You're hoping for people to find your listing or waiting for them to walk in. Whatnot flips that right on its head.

1:07:38On Whatnot, you go live and sell directly to people in real time. They see what you've got, they ask questions and buy. And they keep coming back. Whatnot is the largest dedicated live shopping platform, whether it's beauty, collectibles, electronics, luxury fashion, or heck, even cookies. Sellers are building real thriving businesses. Anyone can sell. Whether your business is big, small, or yet to exist, people selling on whatnot sell 10 times more than on other major marketplaces. That's because you're not just listing products. You're building real connections with buyers. search whatnot w-h-a-t-n-o-t in the app store download and you can start selling right away you know i love that you're sharing that and something i just want to add to that um i used to say this i did a lot of couples counseling as well as individual counseling and i specialize in trauma so primarily sexual and domestic violence uh trafficking human trafficking and i would say to my clients i don't ever discredit them but i would say to them how how is the best way you can empower yourself in the moment when you feel triggered?

1:08:45Because are you actually triggered or are you anticipating the trigger? And they would look at me and some people were like open to it and be like, wow, I never thought of that. And other people would be closed off arms crossed. Like, no, I'm triggered because he and she did this. And I would say to them, just look at it with an open mind, explore it because you're giving people or situations power over you. And it's not to minimize what people have gone through because triggers aren't just for trauma you can be triggered when someone cuts you off in traffic and gives you the finger when you're like dude you're the one that cut me off but i mean owning it and then i like that the 92nd because it's like i know people that walk around all day triggered all day that's their identity it's their identity good god and they don't see it you know and i'm like the common denominator might be you you you you know you so that's it we always bring ourselves to the party right it's like yeah i make a joke all the time right it's like you know my two oldest from a you know previous marriage and most people know that yeah but you know they jaggy's been in their lives since they were little little little little yeah right but my family dynamic is for us and you know what like it is what it is and um i forgot i was going with it shit triggered people were triggered we're talking about triggers weren't we yeah we're talking about triggers son of a bitch man i need an adderall fuck i can't remember i was going with it man we're talking about triggers you're too old this is from your your previous relationship thank you common denominator right so i have this joke where everybody says oh my god your children are so beautiful i go one common denominator yeah this motherfucker because all three for me yeah it's a joke so it's common denominator.

1:10:38I love it because Anthony adopted my son. So I was married, um, for a very short time in a horrible situation long enough to have my son and get up. That's what I say. And, um, he adopted my son. He's raised my son. He's the only father. My son has known and we will go places. And my son is the male version of me. Okay. He's six foot two. He's taller than me, but he's the male version of me. Um, and people say, Oh man, you look like your dad. And it used to burn me so bad. I'm like genetic queen here. Yeah. I was like, hi. But then I realized, no, this is amazing for my son because it's so inclusive and he doesn't have to like barf his story on everyone.

1:11:16Cause people want to always know like the nitty gritty when it's none of their business. Yeah. And so I, you know, I'd be like, oh yeah. And Anthony would just glow. Right. And he would say things, not the common denominator, but he would say things. And I thought, wow. But you just made me think of that. And that is hilarious, but true. What's even funnier is people will go to my wife and when my oldest and my middle, so my son and then my middle daughter, when they're all three sitting together, oh my God, they'll go to her and go, they look so much like you. i'm like and then and jackie goes well ours that we have together looks nothing like me looks just like her dad hilarious she goes at least i got two of them that look like but i mean it no i mean all the kids resemble each other and i think what the what the great thing is and by the way like i want to edify you because that that isn't easy man that isn't It may be easy for you, but there's a lot of people out there that don't do those things.

1:12:21And that's not my problem. So that's a real man. Absolutely. And I love that. And, you know, but, you know, it's so important because, you know, you know, the whole genetic thing, the blood and there's a lot of blood relatives that I don't speak to. Oh, amen. You know what I mean? But I think what being a true parent is, is not about who created that child. No. It's about who really parents and, and cares for that child. Loves and disciplines and guides and comforts and provides. Yeah. It's crazy. And, and, you know, we had a clean break. I know a lot of people listening might be in a different situation, but I didn't, I didn't have child support.

1:13:03I didn't have anything. I just had a clean break. Paid a lot of money to have a clean break. Yeah. And, you know, it's, it's been like, it's my dream family. I always only wanted one child. I always wanted a son. I always wanted him to be an athlete. It's so crazy. Comes back to the athlete. Because you learn so much about yourself through sports. But I always wanted to have like nice home, nice lifestyle, like, and have my career. And Anthony fully supported that, you know? So amazing. So it's, it's been amazing. And having an adult child is glorious. Well, I have two adult childs. One, one's a nine-year-old daughter and the other one's a seven-year-old.

1:13:45I'm going on what? 17 dude. I have a nine-year-old niece and she's, she is going to give my brother-in-law some gray hair. It's, it's so crazy because, you know, I have both, I have boy and a girl. Yeah. and my love for my son is so different than the love for my daughters wow it's just as powerful of course it's different because like and dan knows this it's like he's got a son and a daughter yeah it's your boy's your boy your daughters i will bury somebody like fuck with her fuck with them right but it's like but it's just such a different it's a different thing being a girl dad yeah it's special but oh my god you want to talk about frustrating you're lucky bro you're lucky you don't have a fucking daughter because they can they can they can get you to be the the most ghetto part of you i mean like i have some ghetto i mean i grew up in the ghetto in california like i have some gangster yeah i got some gangster i don't look like it but i got some inner gangster my son tells me i have favo what does that fuck around and find out fuck around and find out yep yep you know yep well so you know my son and my and my wife doesn't like this but my son's 12 he's almost 13 years old he'd be 13 this year yeah i was listening to hip-hop then i turned out all right yeah i think so and so like when it's me and him and we're going to baseball or going coming home for baseball or doing whatever we're doing going for a ride he gets to listen to unedited m &m and unedited and Dre and Pac and all that, because I want him to know that.

1:15:27Right. Yeah. But also want him to have that FAFO energy too, to where he has this little bit of flavor to him, but like, but like my wife does not like the fact that she doesn't like it. I see your point. Yeah. 1000%. She is correct. I am wrong, but that's the reality. That's what we do. But you know, it, it, those are, those are fun moments, man. Because, you know, when I, when he gets in the truck, he's like, Hey, can we, can we listen to Slim Shady? Like, or like the actual song, Slim Shady. I'm like, what do you mean Eminem? He's like, no, the song Slim Shady. He's like, I'm like, okay. He's like, forgot about Dre.

1:16:05I'm like, never have, never will. He's like, no, the song, can you play it? I'm like, it's my guy, man. I actually raised my son listening to those kinds of things. And he will remember now and he'll tell stories. I expose him to all kinds of genres of music, but But he will be like, oh, mom, I never even realized I was in the car seat. Like we were bad. Yeah. Well, I remember looking back at it. My mom was in town like two, three weeks ago. We were all hanging out. And I looked at her. I'm like, you're really questionable, mom. And she goes, what? I go, mom, I was a junior in high school and we were watching Friday together.

1:16:46She goes, yeah, it's not probably not the best thing. it was about smoking weed and selling weed and you know fighting and killing it was like but that but but again like because i think you know back then we could watch something yeah and then completely disconnected from consume us it was like it's a complete disconnection from what the life that i live but good god oh my oh my wow dude we're flying by yeah we're already at an hour we haven't even i want but so let's shift okay all right so i i want you to walk us through how you just wrapped season six of women who lead. How'd it go? Like what were some of the interesting people you've had on and where are you going for season seven?

1:17:24Yeah. So good question. So, um, season six was my best yet because every season gets better. Of course, as you know, um, I had some amazing women on Alicia, actually a Hardiman. She's just been nominated for the top Canadian woman entrepreneur award. Wow. Um, she was on season six, a couple other women, uh, Tanya at Bergen. She is a powerhouse. She works with a woman named Kathleen Cameron, who is really big under Bob Proctor. Rest in peace, Bob Proctor. Just so many women, private chefs, just women that are doing the dreams that were on their heart as little girls. And why that matters to me is because that's what I'm living out.

1:18:05All the things I said I wanted to do as a little girl that people had said like, oh, you come from a broken home or that'll never work for you. I'm doing it so I'm like yeah underdogs always come out on top if they persist um but yeah I've had so many amazing guests and the whole dynamic of my show like when I developed the show and pitched it to the network I didn't I had no idea that it would be this and I'm so humbled and I'm so grateful and I feel like I'm just getting warmed up so I'm thinking of season seven and I'm thinking really big, even bigger than what we've done, like primetime big.

1:18:40And so I actually was just texting with my, one of my producers and I was like, you know, we got a chat. I got all these ideas. And so she literally was like, woo, we love these ideas. That's, that's the brand girl. It is. It's a moonshot. You gotta, you gotta get it. Yeah. But it's crazy because it's like, I mean, four years ago when we were, you know, when you came on my show, you were on season two. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. And you know what, now one thing that's really different, and this is just to help anyone listening, if they have a show, one thing I've gotten really good at is partnering with different brands that I believe in and that I love.

1:19:16And so I get all my outfits sponsored. So I have full wardrobes. I have a lot of wardrobes. Well, we need to work on the wardrobe stuff. But I've learned how to leverage my talent. Yeah. And the impact. I mean, it's all about impact for me. That is at the end of the day what it's about. But there's been so much growth. And I think it's just taken a lot of leaning back and learning and figuring it out as, as we've grown, you know? Yeah. I mean, to your point, you know, like when I rewind to four years ago, I remember, you know, having you on the show and not that I don't look up to you now. Cause I don't want you to misconstrue that.

1:19:54Cause I do. Right. You know, but back then I'm like, oh my God, she's got a TV show. She's got two seasons. And like, and she's coming on my show. Like what? I don't even know what I'm going to do. I don't even know what I'm going to talk about, but it's crazy because like when you look back at all of it, right. And everybody grows and everybody, you either rise to the occasion or you find something different to do. Right. Cause how many people do you know in that time period that we knew together that are doing nothing, that they're not doing anything that what they were doing back then. I'd say at least 75%.

1:20:24At least probably higher. Yeah. It's like, they don't even come across the, I don't even know what, I hope they're okay. Yeah. I've been checking, probably check in on them, but no, it's like, I'll go back in. Like if I, if someone pops into my mind, I'll type their handle in, you know, I'm like, what are they doing? Okay. They're still doing it. Cool. They're just not coming across things. So I'll like a couple of things. They start coming so I can support. Right. But, but it's just, it's crazy to me because this whole thing is kind of surreal. You know, the whole growth engine behind the show and the personal brand and like how it's gone.

1:21:01Yeah. Is kind of really cool to look at from Sean four years ago. Not now. Yeah. Because the Sean now doesn't get it. Yeah. But the dude four years ago would literally kill and maim to be in this seat right now. Yeah. And so like, that's just kind of a point I wanted to bring up for the audience that is sitting there and they may not have everything they want right now. because trust me, I'm far away from where I want to be. Oh, same. I'm not even close. Not even close. Yep. But like, I've got to sit with the fact that we've grown it pretty damn good and pretty damn quick. Absolutely. And it's so funny.

1:21:36I was talking to somebody the other day up in New York because we're going up there to potentially do a pretty big show with somebody on the third. I'm still waiting on... Details. Yeah, he's actually available and he's available at this time. And I was talking to the studio owner right like hey i'm gonna have the this this name on um and i'll tell you off air okay um but i'm like you got any other big names and he's like yeah yeah yeah i got this person this person this person what about this person do you want this person i'm like to the point where like he's telling me that he's friends with the person that wrote rudy the screen wrote the script wow and he lives in naples by the way really yeah i was like yeah he can come on anytime i'm like to think that I could have the guy that wrote Rudy sitting right, right there, right here.

1:22:25But he said, he asked me a question and I paused. It's like, Hey, let me ask you a question, dude. I'm like, what's up, man. He goes, I just looked you up on Apple. I was like, okay. It's like, dude, you're top 25 out of every show in America. He's like, not categorically. I go, I'm aware you're talking about out of all the genres, like all the, whatever. He goes, yeah. He goes, how the hell did you do that in five years it's like i know it took forever huh yeah he's like that's fast yeah doesn't feel like it no it never does to the person in it yeah do you know what i mean yeah that could be applicable to anything that people are building it never feels like it for us yeah but it's it's amazing so it's you know and then the other the other question is he's like, do you ever fall out of that?

1:23:13And I'm like, yeah, of course there's time where we'll fall to 35, come back up, get up to 20, fall to 27. And he goes, but that's not that big of a swing. I'm like, no. He goes, why don't you think you fall further? I said, cause I guess in your words, you know, I mean, I feel it took a long time. You said it was quick, but you know, maybe it's because we were in the top 100 for a long time. Then we were top 60 for a long time, drop back down to out of the top hundred then back and we've worked all the way up yeah and then i think if when you stay consistent you bring valuable conversations or whatever the value prop is for whatever it is you do yeah if you keep showing up they're tuning in like new listeners too yeah it it you're staying power yeah if you do it the right way you're staying powers there because you don't i mean again we met and there's a there was a bunch of flash in the pants Yeah.

1:24:11I don't hear anything about them anymore. Never. I, I, like I said, I hope they're okay. I mean, I don't hear anything. Yeah. And it's because they can, and then when you look at it, it's because they didn't do it the right way. Yeah. Oh, you just said something that I, I, I literally pray about this and meditate on it. I've been, I've been offered a lot of shortcuts and I could have done a lot of different things, um, to get a lot of different things. And I always believe in integrity and my tenacity is strong. And I know that God will reward me because I'm doing it the right way. yeah right so that's it yeah there's a lot of shady like people and um it's unfortunate because people are selling shortcuts but shortcuts never sustain no i think not usually no i think you know shortcuts are are great if you're trying to get somewhere quicker and you go and you only want to have it for a year or two yeah it's cool yeah go ahead and do that if you want to burn out go for it right this show is iconic so that's why you've been building it the way thank you i don't I don't know that.

1:25:15I mean, that's own it. I have a hard time accepting that. I appreciate you, but it is. Um, but yeah, man, I think it's just about, you know, I mean, and again, it's a little bit about me, but it's been more about conversations like this that people get to. Yeah. We're not talking about clickbait. We're not talking about this. We're not talking about anything stupid. We're not following trends. Yeah. Again, I think PR wise, you do have to follow some trends. Absolutely. We have to do that. Right. If there's a storyline coming out. I try to get on it. And if we can't turn it around in time, then I won't do it.

1:25:48Because it doesn't make sense to do something and then turn it around two weeks later when it doesn't matter anymore. The cycle's gone, right? You got to know if it's going to be a long burn or a quick burn. If it's a quick burn, get on it now. If it's a long burn, you got time. Now, you may have seen the buzz, but let me give you the inside scoop. Babe Ruth, Barry Bonds, Ken Griffey Jr., Mark McGuire, all the greats. What do they have in common? They have collectibles and they're being sold on WhatNot right now. And it brought me back to my childhood. Knowing that I can get my hands on something cool like that really gives me hope.

1:26:19So if you're selling online or out of a storefront, full-time or as a side hustle, you already know the challenges. You're hoping for people to find your listing or waiting for them to walk in. WhatNot flips that right on its head. On WhatNot, you go live and sell directly to people in real time. They see what you've got, they ask questions and buy. And they keep coming back. WhatNot is the largest dedicated live shopping platform, whether it's beauty, collectibles, electronics, luxury fashion, or heck, even cookies. Sellers are building real thriving businesses. Anyone can sell. Whether your business is big, small, or yet to exist, people selling on WhatNot sell 10 times more than on other major marketplaces.

1:27:01That's because you're not just listing products. You're building real connections with buyers. search whatnot w-h-a-t-n-o-t in the app store download and you can start selling right away you know but it's just interesting um before we uh you know close it out i want you to also talk about you're doing something for international women's day and you're giving away a lot of your books yeah um so let's talk about your book and let's talk about that and how women can you know participate or be a part of, of that day. Cool. Okay. So I'm actually, I'm speaking at an event at the chamber of commerce and I'm going to be doing a circle exercise, which is in my first book I published in 2016, um, primetime success.

1:27:48And it's all about inventory of your circle for, for every relationship, whether it's a paid relationship or a personal relationship. I'm also going to be talking to them about like, what's it like to actually be in the driver's seat of your life, right? Not in the passenger seat, the driver's seat. um so that's cool and then i actually have um my poetic compilation exposed anthony actually illustrated uh my poet my poetry you did a poetry book yeah i did a poetry book in 2019 and then 2021 i released confessions of a self-care junkie knew that one um which is which is really powerful and i just love empowering women i mean obviously i empower men too but i felt for me personally i wanted to write specifically to women because the healthier a woman is the better she loves and the better she lives as a wife as a mother as a friend as a daughter as a business owner employee whatever so healthy women actually really make a difference um but yeah and then getting a whole i love connecting on instagram instagram is my jam the gram um at christy underscore primer but it's there's so much more to come and i'm just i'm grateful for these kinds of conversations too because sometimes it's not it's not that it's lonely but it's sometimes when people don't are in it and don't get some of the the stress struggles frustrations or even the wins like some people don't get the wins of certain guests that you might have or people you meet or things you get to do um because they don't they're like well of course you did because it's you but they don't actually get what it took to earn that yeah or to receive that um so i love that about you.

1:29:23I love being reconnected. The setup is so dope. It's such a cool, your team is amazing. Thank you. This is, this is amazing. So it's been, it's been one hell of a journey, bud. I mean, it's, and you're just getting warmed up. Yeah. I think we're just starting. Like we're talking multiple millions. That's, that's what I see for you. Billions just declare it right. Done. You know, it's funny. Cause like, um, I've always been able to obviously, like I said, think about what I want. And then eventually it does happen. Yeah. There's a couple things. There's, there's two different numbers that stick in my mind.

1:29:58And the first one is big, but it's a lot smaller than the second. I'm going to share it with you. Okay. The first number is 10 million. Okay. So I don't know when this is going to happen. That's not my job. Yeah. My job is to execute things. And so I see our first, you know, multi-year deal for like three years, 10 million. yeah it's rookie contract yeah right the next one is 250 million yeah i mean i've been saying this for how long two years three years i was shocked when you said 10 million actually and i could be which is fine it's not to criticize by any means i could be undershooting it right i don't know hey when you hit it perfect i mean who knows i might get the 250 first exactly and you're open to that i'm okay with it right i'm okay with it i know how much of my company i own i'll be perfectly fine with that.

1:30:46But no, I just think that, you know, in, in, in, in those numbers that we talk about, you know, it, it, it's not about for me the, you know, 150 million that, that would be mine. It's about what can I create with that? Yeah. What can I do for my daughters? What can I do for my son? You know, and that's the kind of stuff that you look at And now you invest and you have generational wealth. So now, you know, I just want the day to come when my daughters go, okay, we, we just graduated fashion school. Yeah. We want to go to Paris because that's what they want to do. We want to go to Paris and we want to open up our, our own clothing line.

1:31:32Okay. How much you need? Without question. Without, without any hesitation. Yeah. What do you mean, dad? I was like, do you know how much you need? and they're going to say no i'm like okay cool well let's i'm your partner you're going in business with me and i'm going to invest a hundred percent of it just because i don't want to return but you need to do the lay work and tell me how much you need yeah and where do we need to be and when do we need to be there same thing goes for my son whatever he wants to do yeah but i think that's like, like for me, that's what I want. The only thing that I want for me is I want that forever home.

1:32:14And when I'm at home, I want a damn chef. Yeah. I don't want to have to do anything. I don't want my wife to ever groundskeepers. Yes. Landscapers. I don't want my wife to ever have to lift another finger. I don't want to have to even look at laundry. Right. I don't want to have to look at anything like that. And then I want the backyard and everything like that. I want it to be like and you can see it i'm already i already know what it looks like i want it to look like i'm at a resort in cancun for crying out loud that's all i want that's it well and on top of that you're having impact that's rippling through the world so that's the checkmate right we talked about chess when we started talking yeah yeah so checkmate yeah checkmate like i'm bored i grew up playing chess yes i didn't i grew up playing checkers because i'm very smart but i just i i just i crave the moments where i can just look at my wife look at the kids and be like bored yeah yeah me too we'll hop on a plane i'm gonna leave what do you mean i don't know let's go somewhere like right now like right now like let's go i want to be able to go with my friends and like let's take a dude's trip man like like those are that's what i want to do with my money i don't want to i don't need lamborghinis like i don't that's not who i am right eight $58 ,000 purse.

1:33:31Oh, I could feed so many hungry children with$58 ,000. I don't desire a purse. Not judging, you know. Yeah, no, I don't, I don't, I don't want a purse. You don't. Your daughters will. Maybe they'll, maybe they'll design. I'll buy them one. Maybe they'll design the next like big thing. They want their company to be called Fashion Sisters. It used to be Sisters, which I liked more than Fashion Sisters because that's redundant. It's just, it's just sisters. Just, of course it's fashion. We'll work on the company name, but one more question in your true definition, right? Like if you think about the word determination, how is it defined by Christy Primer?

1:34:10I knew this was coming. Cause I watched your show. Hello, you know, being in it to win it relentlessly. So no matter what's going on in life, cause contrast happens, there's, you know, you can be up high in business and family life is down here. or death of a loved one, something, but being in it to win it. And for me, it's, it's just, there's no other option. Like, and I've been told I was a determined young girl from like everyone I met, you know, and it's become, I'm a determined woman. And I take that as a great compliment because when I decide that I want something, I get it. And it's usually better than what I could even conjure up, you know?

1:34:53I love it. it's about doing things when you don't want to do them. Yeah. I do that a lot. Yeah. Well, it's funny because I thought, you know, determination was loud. Yeah. It's not like when we first met, right. I was like, or, you know, I was like, Oh, you gotta go a thousand miles an hour. Yeah. You know, everybody else is going a thousand miles an hour and that's what determination looks like. No, no. Determination to me is sometimes waking up in the morning and putting your shoes on and just getting out of the house. Yeah. Sometimes it's getting to the gym and doing your best that you can, you know, and it's in those moments where nobody else knows what you're going through, but you're still doing your damn thing.

1:35:33Like that is determination and discipline. Yeah. You know, I stole a definition from, from Dan. I used to work with him at paychecks. Okay. And we began, you know, we became really close friends and now he's over here with me and, you know, he'd always ask us, you know, always tells people what's the true definition of commitment and he would always say is doing what you said you're going to do long after the the emotion wears off oh yes and it's funny because in one show i was like that's mine it's very good but i stole it from him and that's my definition of determination because you know it's like doing what you said you're going to do no matter how you feel emotionally yeah because that's what adults do i was going to say that's what we have to do as adulting, you know, our kids might roll their eyes at us.

1:36:20We still have to show up and go to work. Yes, exactly. You know, have an argument with your spouse. You still have to show up and do what you said you're going to do. Right. You know, like you, you have an argument the night before you still got to hop on camera. Yeah. You sleep for two hours. You still have to show up. Dude. I tell you what happened. I tell you what happened. I can't believe it's so funny. You said that. So not last night, but the night before I couldn't fall asleep until 4am. I woke up at six because I had to still get the kids out of the house and help my wife in the morning.

1:36:50But I couldn't sleep because I had this massive headache and I couldn't figure out why. And then it was just like, oh, but then yesterday we didn't have recordings. Thank God. But if I did, I wouldn't have canceled it. I would have done it. Still did everything I needed to do. And then went to my son's baseball game. And then we went to dinner and then I do the thing at night with them. And then I fell asleep hard. Yeah. But it's like, you know, determination just means you're still doing it no matter what. You don't have to scream it. You don't have to tell everybody I'm doing this, but you just do the damn thing, man.

1:37:22I do a lot of things with determination and silence. Sometimes I don't even tell my husband. I mean, I tell him everything. He's like my walking diary. Yeah. Same with my wife. Yeah. But there's a few things that I think, you know what, until I'm actually doing it consistently from my end, I don't want to tell him one more thing that I'm not going to follow through on. that was one of the things when um i said to my wife i was like i'm gonna get in shape she goes okay i'm like that's it yeah and she goes you said it before yeah i was like yeah but i've been it's been three weeks like i've lost you know 12 pounds she goes okay cool but like when are you gonna quit yeah because you you've been through you taught her to think that right exactly so it's like i can relate to that you know but you know you said you know determination sometimes it's to yourself it's very quiet but it's loud very the result yes is like what just happened it's like dude that was five years of grinding or five years of silence and not giving up when you could have how how a million times a day sometimes how many times have you wanted to quit oh lots i mean i i can't even it's not as frequent now yeah um because i've learned how to master my own mind fairly well um when those thoughts creep up but for many years every day like why am i doing this no no one's discovering me i i have so much to share how come no one appreciates me how come no one wants to pay me what i'm worth you know and then i'd hire these coaches and give them all my money and they're like charge what you're worth and i'm like that's not working That doesn't resonate.

1:39:01It's like I'm priceless. Yeah. You know, God says I'm priceless, I'm priceless, but I'd like a lot of cash. Yeah. I like, I like a lot of in my piggy bank, please. It's funny because it's like everything you just said is what I felt. Yeah. For a very long time. You get it. Like so many listeners are right now they're, they're nodding their head. Right. Men and women alike. Like so many of us just feel overlooked or like, when are we going to get the right investor? When are we going to, like, how come we're not making the right decisions? You know? And then it's like, wait a minute. You've been making some good decisions because look at what's been happening.

1:39:38And that's what I do to myself in my head. I'm like, wait a minute. Look at what you have achieved. You've made, like, I've raised a champion. My son is an incredible young man. That's my greatest success in life. Being a good mom. Breaking cycles. Yeah. You know? That's massive. Nothing can beat with that. Yeah. That's massive. That's massive. There's nothing can beat that. Right? Right. Well, yeah. It's like when you look at the whole thing, you know, a lot of times I become speechless about it because I will get frustrated. Oh, I mean, I, and the reason why I asked you how many times have you wanted, because like multiple, like multiple times per day I've wanted to.

1:40:14Yeah. Lots of, yeah. What, what hour is it? Yeah. Like what time is it? Like what day is it? Like maybe at 8am today I was like, man, fuck this. Yeah. But, but it's one of those things where that's an emotional, you know, trigger response that you're reacting to something different. It's not even related to this, that may have happened in the past, right? It's not the root. No, this isn't the root. No, this is, this is the passion. This is the fun part. But, you know, I, the reason I wanted to bring that up and ask you because one, I respect you. And then two, I really want the audience to, to really hear from somebody else how normal is to want to quit.

1:40:46yeah it's often sometimes yeah and different things you know but it doesn't mean you quit i won't quit no like augie mandino said i will persist until i succeed and i chant that when i want to quit i'm like i will persist until and i sometimes say it really loud really quiet and i just remember like what am i doing this for because it's not just for me it's the legacy i want to leave not just even for my son my husband my family but for the world i have a big vision of the amount of people I want to help and I have to stay in it to reach them. If I quit, it could be tomorrow. I could quit today.

1:41:22And then tomorrow I could have had my dream offer the impact of in the world that I I've been desiring for years. Right. So I can't quit. I'm not a quitter. It's funny. No, you're, you're not. And, and I'm not, and I, nobody in this room is no, there's one of those things that, you know, when I think about it, it's like, one more thing before, before we shut it down, because this, I think this is important. When you said something like it wasn't working or it is working or something like that, it made me think of something. I remember talking to an individual probably three, four years ago. And I was giving that person the vision.

1:42:05It was a male. It's giving him the vision of what I wanted to do. And he goes, it's not going to work. it's not gonna work it's not working right now it's not working right now i go until it does yeah and he goes what do you mean i just said until and he's like i don't understand i said well the first time i said until it does and now every time you say something to me that makes no flippin sense i'm gonna say until it worked i love that you have to stay on your shit you you cannot build something beautiful in your life listening to other people that haven't built the exact same thing and for the exact same purposes that you want to build it yeah it has to be you it has to be authentically you 100 absolutely and if you believe in it it will it will end up working out absolutely you have to go and and better like i said better than we imagine you know i'm still waiting for that i'm coming over for you with your personal chef sometime yeah no seriously call me i don't have him yet i don't have him yet but no i mean to the point is is like yeah i mean if i if it it's all in stages right so if i look at it now i'm like no this isn't it yeah but three years ago all i wanted was a studio that to me would have been everything exactly Right.

1:43:30So it's like, you know, different levels of versions of yourself and like really take the time to appreciate where you're at. Sitting it. Enjoy it. Wear it. All of it. That's right. So, well, thank you so much. Thank you. This has been amazing. This has been amazing. So good to see you. Now you're going to go get some food. Yeah. Check out Naples. Check out Naples. Again, I told you, just go to True Food Kitchen. Yeah. It's very good food. Are you taking, you got all these? He's my driver today. He's driving Miss Daisy. simple big guy just go right out on pine ridge you're gonna run right into true food kitchen you'll cross over 41 okay and then that's where it is and then waterside shops are beautiful you have a blast you'll go home a few thousand dollars lighter but it's okay you know i'm working it's my non-scale victories okay buying new clothes go buy a scratch off at a shitty gas station make the money back exactly don't blame us if you lose money doing that seriously but no thank you again And it's been so rewarding to have you back on the show and in person after so many years.

1:44:33And, you know, just like I said earlier, we look back at it. You were episode number 15. Wow. That's insane. That's crazy, man. It's crazy. So, all right, guys, thank you so much for listening. Share the show with somebody you know, love and trust. Look up Christy Primer on Instagram. You'll be able to find her website, find her show from there. But go support her because she's a great woman. And if you are a woman or a man that wants to level up and it's prime time to shine in your life, she's the person to talk to. So until next time, guys, stay determined.