Achieve The Impossible

0:04This is the Ed Milet Show. Welcome back, everybody. So grateful to have you here with me today. You know, we're the fastest growing show in the world for a reason. You know, we do Tuesday conversations that we've always done on the Ed Milet show, which is between me and a peak performer every single week. And you may listen to it at any time, but they come out on Tuesdays. And they've grown by millions and millions because people share those episodes. But if you listen to the show for a long time, the Ed Milet show actually started with me doing what we call solo episodes, which were not conversations with other people.

0:33It was just me teaching and hopefully inspiring every single week. And so we've now added on Thursdays, shorter episodes, the interviews, the conversations are about an hour. These episodes are about 15 to 30 minutes. It's just you and I on topics that matter to you. And so if you have a topic you'd like me to cover on Thursdays, you can direct message me on Instagram at Ed Mylett, E-D-M-Y-L-E-T-T. And hopefully eventually I'll get to your question on the show. So today's topic, let's get into it, are secrets. I've been asked, Ed, what's a secret that we don't hear anywhere else that can help me achieve my vision and my dreams for my life?

1:05because there's all these checkmark things you'll hear on podcasts or social media that are wonderful tactics. But Ed, do you have something you could share with us that's almost like a secret of yours that no one else covers? And so I'm going to do that with you today. See, one of the things I'm a big believer in is that you must touch your dreams before you have them in order to make them a reality. You have to touch them. You have to become in proximity to them. You have to become familiar with them. See, in life, we will never exceed what we believe we're worth or we deserve. We'll never get more than we believe we deserve.

1:33We will also never acquire or be somewhere we don't believe we belong. And if you're like me, I was raised where when I would see affluent or rich people in their homes or their mansions or their nice cars or even a nice restaurant, even a nice hotel, I don't know really why it was felt in my family that way. But I always had this sense, we don't belong there. We don't belong there. And then even when I would see super happy families, because many of you know that I grew up with an alcoholic father who eventually got sober, but I remember as a little boy, sometimes wishing I was in another family, because they seemed happy and joyous, and I knew the strife and anxiety and tension that was going on in my home.

2:14And I remember thinking even as a little boy, I really don't belong in those happy houses. And I certainly don't belong in those rich hotels or mansions. You'll never end up anywhere you don't believe you belong. And so what I had to do, and I think you're going to need to do, and I think this will be special for you today, is you have to begin to condition your brain and condition your spirit into believing you belong in these places. So I want you to write this down. Touch your dreams. It's so important that you touch your dreams because what that does in your life, think about it this way. Think of someone who's a professional athlete right now.

2:45Pick anybody that you admire, LeBron James or Aaron Judge in baseball or a great golfer like Brooks Koepka, whoever it might be. Pick the sport. One of the things they had the benefit of is playing that sport as a young boy or Serena Williams in tennis, right? Or as a young girl. And what happens is they become familiar in those environments. And so as they go through the ranks and climb and acquire more and more talents and skills, they believe they belong there because they've been on a tennis court a thousand times. They've been on a golf course a thousand times. They've been on a baseball diamond a thousand times or a basketball court.

3:19so they didn't have to worry about whether they belonged or whether they touched the dream. They touched every day as they caught a ball, hit it, threw it, dunked it, hit a driver. So they actually, over time, spent time in their dream. And as they acquired more talents and skills, it naturally perpetuated them. But most of us, the career we're in or the mansion we want to get to or the home we want or the relationship we want or the emotions we want to feel, we haven't had the benefit of spending time in those environments. And because we haven't had any time in those environments, even if we acquire the skills and the talents and the opportunities to get there, if we don't believe we belong there, or we're not familiar with it, we don't end up there.

4:02And so what I had to do, and I started doing it pretty young, is I had to begin to condition myself to believe I belong there by touching my dreams. And so I'm going to talk to you about a couple different strategies on this that I think are a very, very big deal. See, your mind moves towards, gravitates towards what it's most familiar with. So if it's most familiar with your current environment all the time, it's going to continue to gravitate and attract that environment because you're vibrating at that frequency. It's your most dominant thought. It's your most common circumstance. And so if you don't do anything to shake that up, to shake the visual picture of your life, what you're touching, feeling, smelling, you end up just sort of acquiring skills and you never move out of that environment and get to the dream.

4:46So I knew I had to start touching my dreams. And what I did is I would do those. I had to create strategies and I recommend you do. Some of them cost money and some of them are completely free. So I know some of your listeners go, listen, I have no money. You don't understand my situation. I'm in debt. I can't do a few of the things you're going to recommend. Don't worry. I'm going to get to some things for you in a minute as well. And then those of you on a limited budget like me, I'm going to talk about spending just a little bit. Okay, just a little bit. Nothing I'm going to talk about is mega expensive.

5:13Okay. So what I did was I was coming up in business, I was used to, I guess what you would probably call a lower middle class lifestyle. Okay. And I would see, like I said, these mansions and hotels and cars and happiness even, and think I didn't belong there. And I became very uncomfortable even thinking about those environments. So I had to start putting myself in those environments on very short term basis. So what I would do is I was in the sales business. I would create incentives with myself. Stay with me. This is very important in your life. I would create incentives with myself where I would say, hey, okay, Ed, if you make 10 sales this month, whatever it was, 10 sales, or you make$5 ,000, or you make$10 ,000, or you do X or Y, if you do this at the end of the month, you're going to take a one day break and you're going to go touch your dream.

6:00So for example, I lived in Southern California. There was a Ritz-Carlton Hotel in Laguna Beach, Dana Point, California. And I used to set these contests up. I couldn't afford to live at the Ritz-Carlton or where those people go. But what I would do is I said, okay, I'm making$7 ,000 a month. If this month I make 12 sales and I make an extra$2 ,000 back in that time, I'm going to take that extra$300 and I'm going to go spend one night on Saturday night at the Ritz-Carlton Hotel. I would leave my environment. My wife and I would get in our car. We would drive down to the Ritz Carlton. And I remember the first time I got there, not knowing how to even tip the valet and not even wanting to park my car and bring my car to the front of the hotel because it was a Honda CRX.

6:43But I did. And I rolled up to the Ritz Carlton in my Honda CRX. And the valet, I didn't know, do you tip them now? Do you tip them when you come back? So I just tipped them both. I gave in the tip. And I remember the first time I watched my wife get out of the car and I went to grab my bag. He said, no, Mr. Milet, we've got your bag. No one had ever done that for me before. It was very awkward for me. I was afraid they were going to take my bag. And then I remember we walked into the lobby and I saw this marble on the floor and the chandelier. And I'm like, my gosh, it was overwhelming. And then checking in, giving them my credit card and hoping I had enough of my credit card for the incidentals on top of the room.

7:19And the first time it was a little bit awkward. We stayed there and we were laying out at the pool with all these very wealthy people. and we had dinner that night, a decent bottle of wine. And during the daytime, I went and played golf. And I'll talk about that in a minute. My wife went and got a massage and the whole thing cost me, I don't know, at that time, like seven,$800, which was a lot of money to me, but I touched my dream. And then I went back and it's just different. You drove back my ideas, my thinking, my vibrational frequency was just slightly different. And I remember thinking, I want to get back there.

7:47I can't live where they live. I can't wait to get back there. And then the next month I said, if I do X or Y, we'll go back for one night, just one night. We're just going to taste it. Just a bite. I can't eat the whole steak. I can't afford that. I certainly can't have the whole meal. I certainly can't have the rest. But I can have a bite of my dream. And that's what I'm encouraging you to. I had a bite of my dream. And I'll give you other strategies in a minute that aren't anywhere near that expensive. But I had a bite and it tasted good. And the next month I said, if I do six or eight more of these sales, I'm going to go there.

8:15We're going to do one second. And I didn't do it. And so I didn't go because I didn't want to train my brain that we just go. I had to earn it. I had to do something exceptional to get the reward. I did not want to do it. So there were many times I set up these contests myself. I didn't hit them. We didn't go. And I asked my wife, start shopping for deals. Look for discounts. Look for places to go that are expensive, but we can get on the cheap. But then I remember about four months later, I hit my number again. And we went down there again. Same routine, except this time I kind of knew how to handle the valet.

8:43And when I walked in, it's a little bit different. Still a little bit awkward, a little uncomfortable. But now laying out at the pool, I kind of knew where the towels were. I knew what drink to get. You know, my wife knew where the spa was. We didn't have to ask. I knew where the golf course was. And by the way, why was I playing golf? I had a mentor tell me, Ed, rich men play golf. And I remember thinking to myself, I don't even like golf. It's five, six hours. It's boring. I'm not any good. I'm a baseball player. I want some action. Ed, rich men play golf. And I figured out what that really meant.

9:15That was a chance for me to get on a golf course with three or four other guys who were already living like I wanted to live. And I get to spend four or five hours with these people. Even if I didn't know them, how'd they walk? How'd they talk? How'd they think? What are their problems? What kind of vocabulary do they use? So I would go play golf and she would go to the spa. And then we'd have that dinner. And at the dinner, we would dream about what our life would look like and where we were going to go. And I'd say, babe, someday we'll live down here. You know that Ritz Cove that's connected, that community?

9:40That's where we're going to live someday right down here in Laguna Beach. There's a community right next to it. And I was a little bit more familiar. And then about four months after that, we did it again. Except this time, I remember walking in there going, I kind of feel like I belong here. And then I snuck into the gated community and we just drove around. I couldn't get past the guard gate the first time. Then I found a way in. We just walked around and drove around and looked at the homes. And what was happening is I was just touching my dream and becoming more familiar with it. And as I did this over time, as I did this over time, I started to believe I belonged there.

10:18And as I was acquiring more skills, more abilities, more opportunities, this started to happen as well because I belonged there. I was conditioning myself. I was giving myself a mental rehearsal of what my potential life would look like. And then I remember one time I said, hey, if I hit my numbers this month, let's go out to the desert, to Palm Springs area, La Quinta, California. Let's go out to the La Quinta Resort. We went out to the La Quinta Resort. I'll never forget it. Same routine. I played golf. She went to the massage. We sat around the pool. Do you know to this day that my two main homes are in Laguna Beach and La Quinta, California?

10:56Do you think that's by coincidence? See, over time of touching my dream and getting a bite of it, I became familiar with it. Your mind moves towards what you're most familiar with, what you gravitate towards. Now, I think you need to set up incentives to do it. but I'm going to tell you this changed my life. Now, let's step back and you say, Ed, I don't have the money to do that. Great. Here's what I want you to do. Whatever your dream is, let's say your dream is something material. Go to a watch store and try on those watches once a month. Go do that. Go to the suit place and put the suits on, but don't buy them.

11:30Rent a car for a day. Rent a Lambo for a day. Rent a Rolls Royce for a day. Something for a day. I'm going to give you stuff in a minute that costs nothing, just so you know. I'm going from the expensive thing to the nothing thing. Start to touch your dream. Those of you that are doing a little bit better, one time, save up for a year, rent a jet. Instead of taking, by the way, this is the thing I would not do. That's what I see people with success doing all the time. They take these long vacations. I've never taken a long vacation. I would take one and two day vacations, Cabo, Laguna Beach, wherever.

12:00One and two day vacations. Why? I didn't want to lose the momentum in my business. But what would happen, listen to me, when I would get away for a day or two, My environment dictated my thinking. When I got into these other environments, that's when I would dream bigger. That's when I think about my new vision, where I was going, what I wanted to do, what my idea was, what my plan was. People always say, I have a hard time getting my plan together. That's because you're in the same environment. Get out of your environment. Go somewhere for a day or two. By the way, those of you that are trying to climb to success, what are you doing taking one and two and three week-long vacations ever?

12:31I'm 52 years old. You know how many week-long vacations I've taken in my lifetime? time, less than I can count on both hands, maybe less than I can count on one hand. I don't take week and two weeks away. My businesses need me. But I've taken a lot of one in two days, three days, because it's the same juice. I can get the same juice without wringing out the dang orange all the way. I'm coming back and there's all these problems, right? So don't take long breaks. You're trying to climb to the top. Let me just let you in on it. Those of us that have climbed to the top, there weren't long vacations.

13:03I know you see people on Instagram when they're European trip. I don't even know how these people got their money. I don't get all that. That's something you do after you're really wealthy. And even after I got really wealthy, I just have no stomach for it. I don't like being away. I love business. I love my life. I live on vacation now. You want to build a great life? Build and have homes where everybody else vacations someday. And the way you do that is go touch those dreams one bite at a time every couple months. If you gave yourself the gift a couple times a month, excuse me, a couple times a year, three times a year, six times a year of touching your dream, renting the car, renting the house, right, for a week, for, excuse me, for a day, going to the hotel for a, your dream will think, you'll meet people, you'll vibrate differently, your big thinking comes out.

13:49You have a very difficult time changing your thinking in the same environment. It's very difficult to do. So what happened was I was able to change my environment for just 24 or 48 hours. And that's where I would do my big dreaming, my big thinking, my big strategizing. Plus, I'm becoming familiar with the dream. Plus, I'm moving towards it. Plus, I believe I belong there. And your mind moves towards what it's most familiar with. So now I'm becoming a little bit more familiar with this stuff. You starting to get this? Now, you say, Ed, my dream's not material at all. I get it. Most of mine aren't either.

14:19So what if once a month or once a quarter, let's say your dream is to serve in your church. Have you ever just taken a Wednesday off on a vacation day and served at your church, your mosque, your temple, or your synagogue? Do you know what that would do for your spirit and your soul to touch that dream? Have you ever just taken a day off and spent it doing something that's your dream? Just the day off, you just unplug. You just sit on the beach, right? If your dream is service, what if you took a day and served at a homeless shelter or a soup kitchen, right or anywhere like that or a women's shelter whatever it might be right or you want to get involved in helping people with cancer or there's a charity or something you want to get behind take a day and touch that dream it costs nothing if you have no money but it's material drive into the nice neighborhoods get out and walk around go to open houses touch these things if it's you wish you could be a trainer full-time there's a career you want to do but you got to pay the bills the other day.

15:19Take one day and go do that career. Ask someone if you can, for one day, get mentored by them. Follow them around the gym if that's what you want to do. Follow them around the lab. Follow them around the business office. Touch your dream. Now, these things in my life have changed me. Why? There's also proximity to power. There's proximity to being around power, and power is your dream. Power is the people who have those dreams. Those people have the answers, the thoughts, the vocabulary, the vibrational frequency, the relationships. I remember watching these guys playing golf and just how they walked was different than me.

15:54What they talked about was different than me. And not all of them had it, but some of them did. I remember one of the first times we were laying out of the pool going, wow, people just lay like this and relax? I've never done this in my damn life. I wonder if there's some correlation between this relaxation and being successful. And so do you understand what I'm telling you? That an element that's missing in your life, listen to me, is you touching your dream. And then here's the free one of all of them. Mental rehearsal, just visualization of the dream, giving yourself the gift of picturing yourself driving that car, picturing yourself in that church, picturing yourself with that body, picturing yourself in that relationship, picturing yourself with that emotion.

16:36Mental rehearsal causes you to believe you belong in the dream. Do you mentally rehearse? How often do you mentally rehearse? Because what's really happening is your visual sphere, your auditory fear, your kinesthetic fear, the things you touch on a regular basis, hear and see are mentally rehearsing the rest of your life for you. So at some point, you have to take control of that, override it, and actually force yourself to mentally rehearse the things you want in your life. That's a form of touching your dream. It's the lowest vibrational frequency is picturing it, but it's better than not. And if you do it enough times, because dreaming is free, you could do this daily and repeat it.

17:21And if you stack up that enough times, it can be more powerful than touching it for one day a quarter. But imagine if you combine the two, the mental rehearsal in your life of whatever the emotion, the dream, the car, the house, the relationship, the service, the contribution, the memory, the rapid, the repetitious mental rehearsal. And then once or twice a year, four or five times a year, you go touch your dream on a budget or even not on a budget. You drive the neighborhood, you try on the watch, you try on the shoes, you try on. Listen to me. These things matter. You put yourself in these environments.

17:55You go have dinner at, you know, a lot of people go, we go out to dinner every single week, once a week. Let's just say you do that. Okay. What if you just went once a month, but you went to the place you'd like to go the rest of your life. So you saved the money from those three meals that you don't go. And on the fourth one, you go to the place you'd like to be and get the touch the dream. You starting to see what I'm saying? Some of you that are a little bit further along, you'll give yourself a gift. You got a couple of bucks. Have a night where you don't go out and you have a chef come cook for you.

18:22And I know that some of these things are things that many of you are nowhere near ready to do. Remember what I just said. I started out by driving the neighborhoods for free, just getting into the neighborhood. I couldn't even get into the houses. I couldn't even get through the gates. And then that graduated to one night at a hotel near those neighborhoods. But where it really started was the mental rehearsal. Ed Milet had to convince himself he belonged in his dreams. Ed Milet had to become familiar with these dreams by touching them mentally, physically, and actually auditory as well. I remember the first time we didn't get, when we would go to the Ritz-Carlton, we would always get the cheap garden room.

19:01And I remember about two years into doing it, I go, we're going to get the oceanfront. And I'll never forget the first time when I woke up and I could hear the waves crashing. Actually, I went to sleep. Frankly, the waves were so foreign to me that I had a hard time sleeping with the noise. But I remember waking up and I opened the door on our balcony. This is two years into doing this. I opened the door on our balcony and I went, oh, wow, this is a different morning. You wake up here in the ocean waves and feeling that breeze and that smell of the salt water. I belong here. I want this. And it incentivized me to work a thousand times harder had I not experienced it.

19:45Somehow this starts to change our desire level as well. And so you start mixing all this together. You got a little bit of a recipe. So let me ask you today. Doesn't cost you anything to dream and mentally rehearse. Are you willing to do that? Number one. Whatever it is, material or not material. Number two, are you willing to start setting up some incentives with yourself or just start saving for that once a quarter, once a month, twice a year experience for a day or two where you touch your dream? Third, if it's service-oriented, are you willing to take off a day, a quarter, and go serve in your church or your synagogue or your temple, whatever it might be?

20:23Are you willing to go try these things on? Maybe rent a car for a day? Are you willing to do that? Are you willing to touch your dream to some extent? You have to bite the steak before you can eat the whole thing. And this is an element not talked about. Now, if you have the opportunity, you acquire the talents and the skills, I'm telling you, you become an unstoppable force. So my challenge to you today is, are you willing to make any of these adjustments to your life game? Worst case scenario, drive your car somewhere, it's free, and walk around where your dream exists. Walk where it exists.

20:59Maybe your dream is to live in New York City, right? You live in the suburbs of New Jersey. Get in your dadgum car or take a cab and get over there and just walk around and touch it. See it. Smell it. And what starts to happen is you build something called sensory acuity. And this sensory acuity makes your senses more acute. And then in your everyday life, you begin to see people, places, and things that deliver on that dream that you're now familiar with. Here's the truth. Last thing I'll tell you. If you continue to live unfamiliar with your dream, you will die unfamiliar with it. But if you begin to familiarize yourself with your dream, with mental rehearsal or physical touch or the actual experience of doing it on short-term basis, there's a high probability that when you are at the end of your life, you will have lived that dream.

21:50Why is it so important to achieve your dreams? Because your dreams are not a joke. Your dreams are not a hallucination. See, I believe God gives you your dreams as a preview as to what's possible in your life. These are the possibilities. That's why these dreams are in your heart. This is what's possible for you. It doesn't mean it's going to happen. It doesn't even mean it's probable. Here's what's possible. And what I believe is you take possibility to probability by repetition, mental rehearsal, and conditioning. All I did is have dreams of what was possible. the difference with me i believe now that i'm 52 years old on the other side of it obviously with all the hard work but you know what spurred the hard work belief i belong there at some point if you don't believe you belong there you stop catching those ground balls you stop hitting those home runs you stop swinging those golf clubs in practice at some point you got to believe you belong there to make those phone calls eat the right diet make the contacts whatever that thing is in your life you have to have the desire level on the hard work and i believe the hard work only long-term comes from believing you belong there.

22:51And when your entire environment and all the people around you on a daily basis, don't reinforce that and don't condition it. You must override it in short-term bites. But if you do, these things that God's given you as possibilities of your life become probabilities. And then you become what I call an impossibility achiever. And in my life, I feel like I've become an impossibility achiever. What most people think is impossible, I got the recipe for. I start envisioning it. Then I start touching it. Then I start experiencing it. Then I start believing I belong there. Then I become familiar with it.

23:24And then I have it. That's the deal. That's the deal. Anyway, I hope this helps you today. Share this with anybody who's got a dream. Repeat it. Listen to it again. There's got to be an element of what I said today that you're capable of doing. Doesn't cost anything to dream. So dream big, everybody. You were born to do something great with your life. You want a little bit more of this kind of stuff. Remember my friend, Brenda Brouchard's got the growth day app. You can go to growth day.com forward slash ed. You want to be coached by me personally. You can go to the RTA syndicate.com and apply to be coached there.

23:57And, uh, but you know what? I hope every day here, I'm helping you change your life. Please share this. Follow me on Instagram at Ed Milet. God bless you, everybody. This is the Ed Milet show.