Andy Frisella Breaks Down the "0 Options" Mentality

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1:00This is the Ed Myland Show. Welcome back to the show, everybody. So today is something that you all ask for about once a year, and I'm super blessed to be able to do it. I'm sitting in what is the most impressive room I've ever sat in in my life, and I'm fortunate enough that I've been in this room many, many times. The greatest car collection I've ever seen in my life sits in this room, but also like the greatest dude sits in here with me every time. So usually this guy and I sit in here and smoke some cigars and talk about life and business, and we decided today we're going to record it so you guys can listen in.

1:29Yeah. And this is one of my great friends in my life. He's like a young brother to me. I've learned so much from him. I'm very proud of him. And he makes a difference in the world. You guys, he's making a huge difference in the world. He speaks his mind, which I know he'll do again today. And we're just going to talk about business because you guys all want to lean in and know what we talk about every single day. He's my partner in the Arte Syndicate, which we have the greatest business coaching program together in the world. He's the founder of First Form. He's the founder of Form Energy. And not all of you might know this.

1:58You know, he also is the founder of 75 Hard, which has been the greatest mental toughness movement on planet Earth the last five to seven years. So his name is Andy Frisella. Andy, welcome back to the show. Thank you, bro. It's awesome to have you here, man. Great to have you. Yeah, I appreciate all the kind words and, you know, they're reciprocated. Thank you, brother. I know that. So it's interesting. We're sitting in this room. I won't give you the number, everybody, of what the car collection's worth. It's a former president's home you live in. It's a pretty darn nice place. And every time I come here, I get my vision stretched a little bit.

2:27But I think people would be surprised about our private conversations. And so you're founded, you know, right now, the fastest growing energy drink in the world, the biggest movement online the last five years, like I said, and first form is this behemoth in the industry and well and growing. Yet you don't feel successful. And it's actually sincere. I mean, I don't think you think you're broke, but in your own mind, and I think this is a recipe that people need to learn, like you truly, as we sit here, don't feel like you've made it. why is that and what's that mindset like you know how i look at it is a little bit different i think most people look at it you know i'm i'm 46 now um done done a few things right but that's maybe half my life or half my potential right and i feel like a lot of people they get to a certain level and they start to feel like they're there and i've just seen so many people get to that point and lose it that that i just i just stopped looking at it the way that most people look at it i look at it differently you know when i define what i think success is i believe it's the commitment to one's true potential to the pursuit of one's true potential Okay.

3:48So what that means to me is that as you push down the path of winning and success, you're gaining new potential. You're gaining new skills. You're learning, you're becoming more effective. And if you were to just stop, then you're leaving all this potential on the table. And so if we're talking about like what success really is, it evolves over time you know what success was to me on the first day of my entrepreneurial journey is not what it is now and that's not what it's going to be in five years from now and so i just believe that when you think about it the way that i think about it and you think about like pursuing your own true potential well what that means is is that as you go down the path your potential is expanding on the back end really good right because you've learned new skills you've had new experiences you've made new relationships you have different resources and um what that ultimately means unfortunately is that you know you could never hit your true potential right because eventually you're limited by time right we're gonna die so uh how i define success is just simply pursuing that knowing that you're always going to leave things on the table, but you have a duty to become the best version of yourself.

5:15If not just for yourself and your family, for everybody else to see. You always say that word duty. Why is that the word you use instead of, you know, like commitment or whatever you call it like a, like it's something deeper than that to you. Yeah. I think, I think it is a duty. You know, when I think of like, meaning like, because you've been so blessed to live in this country or whatever it is that you, I look at it like this. Okay. It does have something to do with our country. But when we think about like what creates a stable, functioning, high functioning civilization, it comes from ambitious men.

5:57It comes from ambitious people. It comes from people who have big dreams, big goals, who are willing to go down that path with no guarantee to create something special, something great that inspires other people to do the same. And eventually when you get, you know, you can't understand this when you don't have anything. You know, when you're first starting out, you're like, man, I'm eating ramen. It's hard to think about other people when you're eating ramen. That's true. Right. But as you start to win and as you start to grow and as you start to, you know, accumulate things and, you know, all these things that people think success is, you start to realize that there's not a whole lot of fulfillment in those things.

6:37You can enjoy them, but it's not really a fulfilling thing, so to speak. Yep. And, you know, for me, my dad's father, they never met. So my dad's dad was killed. He stormed Normandy and then he was killed six months later in World War Two. And my grandma was pregnant with my dad. So my dad never met his dad and he died when he was like 20 years old. So when I think of like the sacrifice that all these men have made over the centuries of America, I think that we have a duty to honor those sacrifices with what we do with that freedom and what we do with that ability and skill. and so that's part of it okay and then the other part is you know people are so shy and so ashamed in a way of being successful that they keep it to themselves yeah and that doesn't do anything good for anybody else because the truth of the matter is is that if we want a high functioning high drive a high character driven ambitious successful america with the american dream if we want that we have to understand that at some point we're responsible for inspiring that example in the younger generations.

8:05So when I, if I were to just stop and say, Oh, here I am, I'm a rich guy. That's, that's, you know, that probably inspire some people, right? They want to get some stuff, but when they can observe someone who they deem to be successful, continuing to go hard, continuing to try and push, continuing to try and elevate. I think that that's much a much better example to set and so and then so those are two parts and the third part is dude like I'm just wired for it bro yeah you know what I mean like uh I enjoy it I enjoy um inspiring young people I love when I drive one of my cars to the gas station and the little dudes are like oh man it's so cool yeah like I love that yeah so I know you do it I By the way, I was thinking about it.

8:56It's probably, if we go back, it's been a while now. It's probably why we founded Arte Syndicate. I mean, we both wanted to pay it forward. We both wanted to grab people back at a stage we were at at one time and bring them forward. But I've been with you. I want everybody to go back a little bit. I've been with you down that dirt road that you grew up on. Yeah. How far away from here is that? 10 minutes. 10 minutes away. Yeah. And I've been down there. I looked at the home you grew up in. We've actually met one of your neighbors that remembered you when you were a little boy. Yeah. And so I look at that guy.

9:27I know that guy, right? Like I didn't know him then, but I've taken this journey with you. And so there's the, you now that's like, look, I'm going to pay it forward. I'm successful. I want to help other generation. I want to touch my potential. It's a never ending thing. But if we went back when you first started, did you, was there like a dream and a vision? Like we'd be sitting in a room with, I don't know, $70 million car collection or whatever. They're sitting around here and smoking cigars and, you know, having the life that you live? Or were you just like, look, man, I'd like to get my head above water and be financially independent.

10:00Or was there always this part of you in the background? I want you to answer this because there's most of the people listening to us are there where you and I have been back in the very beginning, kind of a little bit of a dream, trying to get their life off the ground. What were you thinking then? Were you thinking all this stuff then? Or were you like, just get ahead above water? You know, it's, it's in the beginning, dude, it was, it was, I just wanted to make a lot of money. Same here, by the way, that's the honest answer. Yeah. Same here. I just wanted to make a lot of money. I thought, you know, I was really into cars growing up.

10:32Um, I always had hot wheels and micro machines and remote control cars, and I was obsessed with cars and I understood very early because my dad planted in my mind that if I was going to ever enjoy that for real, I'd have to make a lot of money. Yeah. So that started for me when I was pretty young um when I was like probably eight or nine years old you know me and my dad were my dad my brother and I were at a gas station there was a guy who had a white Lamborghini Countach this is in the 80s and uh I thought it was the coolest thing I'd ever seen and my dad was always really good about not shitting on other people's success and making it a lesson you know and i think that's hard for a guy to do right like a guy pulls up in a car that costs as much as your house right and you're able to look at him and say hey son that guy's doing something right i don't know what it is right my dad was always good about that um and i think a lot of parents really fail at that you know a lot of parents when they see other people's success they allow their own insecurity and their own jealousy to stop them from passing a valuable lesson on to their children.

11:41Right. Uh, but I got lucky in that way. And I use the term luck very selectively, but you know, you can't really help who your parents are. And, um, so I, my dad's like, yeah, man, that car is awesome. But guess what? You're going to have to make a lot of money to do that. So that kind of started, that's starting me down the road of entrepreneurship. You know, um, when I was a little kid, I was always trying to figure out ways to to hustle you know i had a little baseball card uh like hustle going on in my dad's garage yeah sold uh you know anytime in school there was like a contest to like sell sausage or whatever the stuff was you know i go door to door and sell the shit out of it yep and so that just started that's where it started man and all through school i was never really a good student because i always knew that i wanted to like do more than what i wanted to do wasn't going to be taught in school You knew that.

12:33Right. Yeah. And so and that's kind of where it started, man. What do you think you're I've always wanted to ask you this because I know you obviously, you know, really well now. What was that? Someone's listening to this. And by the way, is it the same skill now? What did you get good at that got you momentum in progress? Like what was the thing that you was it selling? Was it persuasion? and then do you think that same skill whatever it was is required now in this economy with the advent of AI which we'll talk about in a moment like what did you get good at

13:09well naturally dude I'm pretty introverted um I'm not a people person by nature and that was a skill that I had to learn that became probably my best skill I'm able to communicate with people no matter if they're you know guys that have grease and dirt all over them or if they're you know a billionaire walking through the room I'm able to find common ground very quickly and be able to you know connect with people and I did that intentionally you know I used to play a game with myself to train myself to be able to do that because I was scared to talk to people like really scared to talk to people even when I was like going door to door when I was a kid I was terrified of doing it.

13:53And I realized that for me to become effective, I have to be great with people. And that's something that I think almost all successful people have in common. Now there's, there's, there's, there's, uh, outliers to that, but you know, having great, strong people skills is, is a super, super, super important. And dude, I used to play this little game. I used to go to, the local grocery store here and I would make myself talk to three people, a real conversation, three random strangers, and then I could go home. So I'd walk in cold and I would make myself do three conversations and then I would go home.

14:33I did that for years, for years so that I could get comfortable, like real comfortable, you know, talking to people. And then that skillset, you know kind of led to all all different great things in my life you know uh great relationships great partners great networks just from you know having that skill set other than that dude like real talk I don't think I'm really that great at anything um I think I'm good I think anybody who had has done what I've done for 27 years would be as good as as I am I come out it's one of the points very rarely. I very much disagree with that latter. I'm going to tell you a couple of things I think you're great at, and then I want you to talk about them and don't be humble.

15:16Okay. So one thing you are really great at is vision. You see things before they happen. You also did not create all of this in your life without a really clear vision and dream. Okay. So that is some, I think a lot of times when we're good at something, we just take for granted that we're good at it. That could be your, your go back there. You're broke. Some of you probably know this. We're not going to cover all the stories we've covered before, but this guy was an overnight success in a decade. Okay. It took him a decade to make any money. I mean like even any money where he could really eat consistently on that dime without supplementing his income.

15:52Okay. So during that time, you probably wanted to quit a million times, probably almost did a million times. Like a lot of people listening, you are a visionary to this day of all of my friends. I think you're the friend that stretches my vision the most. He's always sending me, hey, bro, look at this yacht. And it's not all material things. He'll send me photos sometimes. Hey, man, don't tell anybody else this, but the company just did this for this cause or whatever it is. He'll never tell you guys, but he'll share with me. You're extremely visionary person. And I think it's one of my skills too.

16:24I don't even know where it comes from because I didn't grow up with any of that. But I'm always seeing what the future could look like. I don't know that I always believe I'll get it, but don't you agree? Let's be real. And we'll talk about another skill I think you have in a minute but that's a real thing with you did you have that back sleeping on the mattress then I had dreams I had dream like what maybe this would be cool this is what I would like but that's why I also believe there's a lot of truth to like metaphysical law of attraction uh and those things as well um but I actually think that the vision comes from experience if I'm being honest you know when you see things when you when you've been in business for so long and you've seen things play out over and over and over again, you get really good at seeing past the first or second decision that's going to be made off of the decision that you're making now, right?

17:15I'm going to choose this now. And then these two things could happen. I think this thing's going to happen. And then these two things could happen. I think that's things going to happen. So it's more of like a calculated regurgitation of things that you've already seen. And so I don't know that it's a gift more than it is just being around for a long time and watching things unfold i don't know if it's a gift but it's a skill that it's definitely a skill it's a skill because i think when you hear giftedness i think people think well maybe that he just got given yeah so you make a really good point yeah here's the other thing that i think is like i'm trying to find things on the show most people do it only look at that first decision you're right you know what i'm saying yeah they make that decision and they don't have the capacity to look one two or three steps down the line and I think that's a big handicap for most business owners, if I'm being honest.

18:01Well, we'll talk about a couple of the ones you've made, too. Here's another thing. I always try to find things on the show when you and I are together that you and I talk about, but I don't ever really hear discussed elsewhere that I'm comfortable putting. I think number one skill in business and life is communication. And so if your team's communication is messy, customers feel it. Big, huge problem in business today. Missed messages, dropped threads, and here's a biggie. Slow replies. And that's why today's episode is brought to you by Quo. They're spelled Q-U-O. I think you should lean in and listen to this.

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20:16and here's one of them you and i if people i think people see it with you more than they would me but you run hot and what i mean by that is not just like a temper i don't mean that i mean there's a level of intensity to you that i think even the guys that came with me here today shaking your hand, meeting you. There's a frequency, like there's a level of intensity. I'd like to think I have that as well. And I think that it's one of the secret sauces and elements of successful people. They almost will things to happen. I know it's God's blessing, but there's a level. I think people underestimate the level of intensity you have to bring to making something great happen in your life.

20:59No doubt. I think it's, I think it's one of the biggest things i think it's one of the biggest problems in the entrepreneurial landscape right now entrepreneurship has become a like a a thing that is presented like it's for everybody okay it's not for everybody and it doesn't matter i don't care what all the other guys say none of them have built what i built that's just the truth and i'm just telling you dude it's not for everyone because you're you're trading a lot of things for other things and it takes everything and i think one of the things that I did I was always that way yep I was always that way like when I was in when I was young in sports when I was in high school in sports when I got through college every I was always ultra competitive and ultra urgent about winning now I might not be urgent about everything but I always wanted to win and um I think over the course of my journey that intensity increased to the point where I could almost not control it.

22:06And then once I matured a little bit, I was able to bring it back in line and know when it's appropriate. Right. So it's like this awesome weapon that you have, but you got to know how to use it, you know, but I feel like this is one of my roles in your life. Absolutely. That you met. No, absolutely, bro. Yeah. If I didn't have you as a, as a, one of my brothers do that I can call and talk to I go f***ing crazy that's the truth thank you because I don't have that many people outside of like my own brother and my own business partners that really understand that right you know what I mean so and you met me by the way after I you're just so brilliant the way you just articulate you met me after I made that discovery meaning I've got to deploy this intensity strategically I learned it from okay from you okay like when you and I met I was just running wild bro right like I was bull in a china shop I just let my energy and my my my urgency and everything just I just nuked everything you did and uh and by the way you were already very successful yeah but but I mean dude that's not a fun way to live right because you're always pissed off and there's a cap yeah because you build things and obliterate them you build people and hurt them you it's because I've done it right yeah and I I regret some of that.

23:21But this is what I want people to understand that want to be entrepreneurs, or I think just want to be a professional athlete or want to be a great whatever. Great at anything. I'd rather have somebody that I've got to dial back than someone I've got to dial up. You've got to bring this pace and this urgency and this intensity to your mission that I think people underestimate because of social media. Everyone looks like they're having a good time. You can have complete balance. You can, you know, ski in the Alps of Switzerland. And then at the same time, be closing deals on your laptop and whatever the heck this stuff's been pre.

23:55And I, I just have not had that experience, nor of the real people like you that I know that are successful. These folks run hot. They're intense people. Doesn't mean they're loud or, uh, they have deep voices like you. That's not what I'm talking about because plenty of these people are women, right but there's a thing in them there's this dog in them almost like you know what i mean by that they got that dog in them they got that it's like a fire you have to control rather than try to ignite yeah i look i think it's required okay i don't know anybody now i know a lot of people who sell maybe they sell digital products or something kind of casually and they got a little more freedom and that's okay because you know maybe that's all they want maybe they just want a little of money to go travel the world and do those things sure i'm not talking about that i'm talking about actual entrepreneurship the creation of things that are an involvement of things that already exist or original thoughts that you take from your brain and put into action to actually create a company that employs people contributes to culture society community that's a different thing than selling you know how to do a widget or whatever right so but to build real things i'm not taking anything away from that sure you make you make half a million bucks or a million bucks a year tremendous travel the world cool dude awesome yep i'm sure that's most people's dream but that's not my dream and um when i think of like the require people have to there's nothing casual about winning there you go absolutely nothing casual about winning you are competing against other people who are willing to give all of everything they have at all times the higher that you go it gets more competitive so if you don't have that urgency and you get in that place of comfort where you know you're cruising out on thursday afternoon and coming back on tuesday day bro you're gonna lose that's just reality it may not feel like you're gonna lose you may not feel like you're losing but you're gonna eventually find out that other people that are doing the same thing as you are working all that time that you're out doing whatever it is you're doing and they're gonna pass you and that's reality yeah and uh sometimes by the time they pass you it's too late because they've evolved too much you're too far behind and i've seen i've seen and I wonder what you think about this, but I have seen more people fail in life that have won once than people who never win, if I'm being honest, because they get that first win and they think it's always going to be there.

26:35And it's just not. I have more friends that used to be successful than currently are, that used to have a little bit of money than currently do, that used to be. Bro, I don't want to be that. Well, I'm being real and I don't know that this is even healthy. By the way when i say healthy to live like you and i live sometimes no it's not healthy it's not listen it's okay not to be this way listen just don't say you want to dominate in business you don't have to look man i'm not saying that you have to be that way right i'm not saying i'm saying if you want to build real things and compete at the highest level then you have to be that way yeah and that's what i want to do and so you know that intensity that i always had and then combined with the urgency of knowing that you're like one day from going out of business you know the first 15 years you're in it yeah that does something to people yeah you know that that that rewires your nervous system man it does rewire yeah and uh and then you know when i met you i i i was doing very well um not comparable to what i'm doing now but doing good and i think i remember telling you how much I made that first time it wasn't very much I remember yeah um it was a lot but it wasn't very much compared to now but the point is is that you know uh what I realized from from having you in my life which I'm very grateful for and I'm not an expert at this by any means still because there's still moments where the old Andy appears yeah um but it is I realized that this is this is a tool and my tool belt and I needed to learn how to use it properly.

28:13And that made me a much more effective entrepreneur and much better leader, much better leader. He's one of the great, he is truly, you guys, he's being very nice to me. He is one of the great American entrepreneurs and he's building multiple multi-billion dollar companies at the same time. And it's been unbelievable to watch as he's matured and as he's grown and as he deploys this intensity. I'm wondering, and answer this for you, not my way, and I know you will anyway because it's you, but do you feel like you, that thing where people have the first win and stop, I've always watched that. This is what happens in my head.

28:48I go, aren't you afraid you're going to lose it? I think to some extent maybe this isn't healthy either. I've developed a lot of self-confidence, but I'm still, I play scared. I think that, and maybe that even sounds like a weakness. No, no, it doesn't. I get it totally. like i show up at work every single day i'm at the office seven days a week at this anybody that works for me knows that i'm there seven days a week i show up there every day think thinking we're going to go out of business even if it's not true wow it's it's a mentality that i used to try and get away from yeah that now i embrace and really appreciate that i have i call it zero options mentality all right so like in the beginning when you're totally at you know where we talked about most people are at the beginning of their journey you don't have an option dude like it's either go or accept what you have understanding that what you have is going to get worse okay because as you get older you're going to be less capable you're going to be less hireable you're going to be less employable your fucking quality of life is going to lower as you get older and if that's what you want to do cool that's just not what I want to do.

29:58And, um, so shit, I lost my train. No, no, no. You're right on it. You're, you're saying basically as you get older and go that you use healthy fear that you have. Oh yeah. Yeah. So, so dude, as you grow and you start to have wins and make success, you know, it's easy to have that mentality of, I have to go no matter what, when you don't have anything, but when you start getting resources and money and success and wealth, how do you operate at that same intensity well you have to trick yourself into believing yep that there's no other option yeah you know and like for me the story i tell myself even though it completely is i know it's not true okay this is going to sound crazy but i tell myself i'm like you don't have a degree all right you don't even need degrees anymore but i tell myself this because that's the area i come from you don't have a degree if you lose you're going to be digging in ditches you don't have any skills like i'm i pretend i'm the same old dude right from the beginning yep and uh and that's what keeps the urgency alive right even though i know it's logically not true like if i were to if i were to somehow lose everything i mean i have enough skills where i could get it back enough relationships i'd get it back like pretty quick right you know um but you think that way like and i do too sometimes i wonder if it's healthy or not but it's kept me, I mean, I, you and I both worked today.

31:23We're sitting here having a nice time. We look great in your place, but we both have worked today, you know, and, and it's a Saturday when we're recording this, everybody. Right. And the other reason is, is that, and maybe this is just a mindset thing and then we'll shift to some AI stuff. But like, for me, I'm a competitor. I tried to play professional baseball. I wasn't good enough. I say I got injured, but I just wasn't good enough. Right. You were a great athlete too. Your brother wasn't good enough. Your brother was really good. Yeah. And he had an injury, but, but this is my sport. Yeah.

31:49Yes. This is my sport. So, um, and it's also a form of expression for both of us. That's why we do RTA. It's like my, I don't play music very well. I can't sing. This is like my art form and my sport simultaneously. Yeah. I don't love every day of it, but left alone, if I didn't do this, I'd have no form of expression. Cause I can't sing. I don't dance. Like I don't do any of that. and I'm not going to be a professional. I used to think I'd be on the senior tour playing golf. I can't break 80 anymore. So, like, this is my sport and my art at the same time, and that's why it doesn't usually feel just like work to me.

32:25The same for you? Yeah, 100%. I grew up wanting to play in NFL. You know, my brother played pro baseball. He would have actually been. Yeah, Sal would have. Sal would have been a 15-year pro MLB guy had he not had a compound fracture in the game. So he grew up in that world. And the one thing I'm grateful for, because, you know, when you don't end up achieving those dreams, at least for me, you know, for the first 10 years when I was like suffering in business, I had nightmares of their dreams. But but they're more like nightmares of playing football. like i would have these dreams of playing football and then i would wake up like with this regret and it's because we weren't successful we weren't making any money things weren't working out you know and then when we started winning it trans i started realizing what you're saying i started realizing whoa this is actually a great thing because now i get to i get to play the game till i'm 70 yes 80 yes right like it's the best game in the world because it's not like baseball or football where you might get six seven eight you know years if you're tom brady you get 20 right but with entrepreneurship it's it's a lifetime and what's cool about it too is that you know in sports these dudes get a little older and they start going downhill well in business you get a little older you get a lot better it's true and so it's uh it's an exciting game and i enjoy it and that's how i look at it that's so funny that you say that about the dream i'll tell you something.