How Leaders Solve Problems

0:04This is the Ed Milet Show. Welcome back to Max Out, everybody. I'm Ed Milet, and I am so excited about today's program because I feel like it's going to make such a difference in so many people's lives because of all of the direct messages I've been getting from people in the Max Out universe saying, Ed, would you please cover this topic? It would make one of the biggest differences in my own life because it's something that I struggle with. And that topic today is problems, specifically how to solve problems better. And I'm excited about covering it because it's something I struggle with as well.

0:34And I love teaching things frankly that helped me own them and get better at them First thing we need to know is let's start out with some basic premises I'm gonna give you some very tactical steps here as we move forward, but problems need energy to live I want you to own that remember this problems need energy to live And so the concept should be that we solve problems But we don't have to pour and deplete ourselves of energy because the more energy you give something the more it expands We want to be in the max out universe We want to pour our energy and expense our energy towards the solution not towards the problem so the first thing I want you to write down is 90 % of your energy focus time and thought should be towards the solution not towards the problem itself This is a mistake most people make because they expend all the energy into the problem They obsess over the problem the problem and when you expand energy It grows to survive and the problem gets bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and the solution becomes more and more more difficult.

1:32So the first thing is, can you consciously begin to focus on energy expansion into the solution, 90 % of it into the solution and not into the problem? What we do is we repeat that problem over and over and over again, and we magnify it to the point where we don't come up with realistic solutions and we deplete ourselves as energy towards the solution. And so focus going forward, when a problem arises, a challenge arises, that you focus 90 % of your energy and thoughts on the solution and not repeating the problem to yourself. And again, I want to remind you, we want problems in our lives. They're the one opportunity we have to grow.

2:11Without the existence of problems and challenges, there's no opportunities for growth in life. And so we don't wish for a life that doesn't have challenges and problems, even though it seems like we would want one. Number one, you're always going to have problems and challenges in life. So today is such a great day to begin to accept strategies and a formula and a mindset that'll help you do that. You're somebody who wants to grow and improve and change in your life and become a maxed out version and a better version of yourself in every area. The only opportunity you have to do that is when problems and challenges arise.

2:41These are growth opportunities in our life. So when they arise, it's very important that you see them as an opportunity to grow. And again, I don't mean that in a rah-rah foofy way. It's very true. It's important that we distinguish what it means because remember this, in other audios I've talked about, the quality of our life is comprised of the quality of emotions we live with. Our life is our emotions, right? If you have the emotions of happiness and joy and ecstasy and peace and faith and passion and intensity and winning, that's a great life. If you have a life that's filled with emotions regularly of depression, anxiety, fear, stress, worry, anger.

3:18That's a totally different quality of life. So our emotions dictate the quality of our life. And so when a stimulus like a problem comes up, we better be thinking it's an opportunity to grow and we better be expensing our energy towards the solution or we start to experience the wrong emotions. Why? Because in our life, emotions come from meaning. Because when problems come up in life, the meaning we take from the event dictates the emotion we experience. And so that emotion dictates the quality of our life. And so I want you going forward, when a problem arrives, to feel the emotion and take the meaning away that this is an opportunity to grow, to expand.

3:55If you look back at your life in hindsight, the problems and challenges you have have all made you better when you solved them. So those are the keys to begin today. The question is, how do we solve them? Is there a process? Is there a mindset? Are there some steps that when these arise, I've got a recipe and a formula? And that's what I want to share with you today. So now I want to start out with a very basic three-step formula to begin with. Then we're going to get very granular and very specific. There are three steps that I always take once I've arrived where I'm ready to take action towards solving problems.

4:27Number one is make a decision. Once you've made a decision, make it. Number two, massive certainty. Flood yourself with certainty. You can't execute at a high level with self-doubt or a doubt about the process, a doubt about your strategy. Flood yourself with certainty that you know what you've got is going to work. And then third, take insane action. This is a recipe in every area of your life. I don't care if it's in business, in family, in sports. Make a decision. Flood yourself with certainty and take massive action. This process I use with the athletes I coach. I use it with the entertainers, with the politicians, with the business people.

5:06I'm always reminding them all the time. I'm repeating them constantly make a decision people wait around too long for the perfect plan I'd rather have a flawed plan executed with certainty and massive action than the perfect plan executed with doubt and very little action There is no perfect decision make one this will crush most problems We've already talked about spending 90 % of our time on the solution and not the problem I'm going to give you another set of percentages here. The vast majority of problems that arise in your life should be solved immediately. Like 85 % of them. Resolved immediately.

5:40Make a decision, massive certainty, take action, it's gone. That means without a lot of deliberation. You've got to start to build the habit of being decisive. Successful people, happy people, leaders are decisive people. And I believe somewhere if there's 100 problems, challenges in life, 85 of them should be decided immediately with not a lot of deliberation. And then certainty and massive action will eliminate that challenge and that problem most of the time. It's the people who procrastinate on the problem or ignore it or think it might go away that gives that problem time to magnify, to fester, to grow to where now it's become bigger than it needed to be.

6:19Second point, get clear on what this problem really means. Is this a problem that's really going to matter in five years? Really? Because what we do is, we talked earlier about meaning. What we do is most people, a problem comes up and we begin to flood ourselves when they stack it and stack it. This is a pattern most people go into, and they lose perspective on how really important this problem is. They lose perspective. They get foggy because they've increased their stress level so high that now the problem is difficult to solve because you've lost perspective on really how big of a deal it is.

6:52And so make sure you're very clear. Is this something that's going to matter in five years? Because if it's not one of those types of problems, for the most part, massive action, 85%. We're going to talk today about the 15 % of the time where it requires a deliberation and a process to solve it. But don't be conflicted or confused into thinking most of the things that arise in your life, most of the time your challenge is you're not solving it quickly enough. You're not being deliberate. You're not being decisive. You're not getting totally certain. Certainty is so huge. Flood yourself with certainty.

7:23the reasons it'll work over and over again, and then most people don't understand. You can obliterate most problems with just massive action. What stress really is when a problem comes up is the fear of loss. And what you do is you begin to give this a disempowering meaning and you begin to feel like you're going to lose something, which is why having a process means so much to me, because when I know I have a process to solve a problem, I'm so much less fearful of the loss or the stress that it's going to cause me. And so just know when you begin to get these feelings, it's where your focus is going that's causing this stress level to rise in you unnecessarily.

8:00And it's probably a pattern you have. We've talked about this a lot in other audios and videos where you have a pattern. And my hallucination for many of you is that when a problem arises, you begin to focus on the problem more than the solution. You begin to magnify your stress level, make a disempowering meaning, which is this fear you're going to lose something. and oftentimes it's not even a thing. Oftentimes it's you're afraid you're going to lose certainty, one of the six needs. You're going to lose your uncertainty. You're going to lose your significance. You might lose someone's love, right?

8:29You may lose the ability to grow or the ability to contribute, but you begin to focus on what you're going to lose and that fear magnetizes the problem and causes you stress. Stress is not a great place to live from. It's one of those disempowering meanings and it's also a terrible place to make decisions from to solve problems. And the third way you create stress when a problem comes up is physically in your body what I call like your state your Physiology you begin to get tense, don't you you begin to hunch over your breathing gets shallow You kind of get clothes that worry that feeling we get you know what I'm talking about This stress level that you use your body to create listen to what I just said you're using your body in such a way to magnetize and elevate your stress level see that physiology of hunched over shallow breathing is something that is the same as depression as fear as worry as stress as pain as anxiety it's the same thing you do with your body to create all those emotions you may need to check if you do this to yourself when a problem arises the other type of physiology is like when we're working out when we're laughing right ecstasy if you're with your significant other right?

9:40That problem, that, that, yes, that celebration, that's a different physiology, isn't it? It's your back straight, you're breathing deeply, you're smiling, you're using your whole body, your face muscles, right? Your face is smiling. There's a certain way you do laughter and joy and pleasure and ecstasy physically, isn't there? And so when a problem arises, check your physiology. You can't make a great decision from a bad physiology. You can't make a decision in stress. And so I'm checking these things all the time. One of the biggest things I check when a problem arises is my physiology, because I have a pattern where I go back to that depressed, worried, stress, anxiety, physiology, and then I either can't make a decision, I can't execute.

10:23So check that pattern with you. When a problem arises, what do I do physically? This is something nobody talks about, but you probably get quiet and hunched over. You start repeating those thoughts and magnifying it and you're using your body in such a way that elevates the stress and gives you a disempowering physiology to make great decisions. So get back to that workout, ecstasy, laughter, joy, passion, physiology. Just move your body, do some jumping jacks, take a quick run, take a walk, right? You've all probably had the experience where you've solved problems working out. You've solved problems in the shower.

10:56You've solved problems in a peak physical state. So change your physiology. You can change the ability to solve that problem. Okay, so let's now transition into a very step-by-step process that I want you to utilize when a problem and challenge arises that's not in the 85 % category that should be solved right away, right? Remember this, worry is a misuse of your imagination. So is stress. So make sure you're taking an empowering meaning. One more meaning I want you to take away is problems are always an indicator that you're making progress. This is so counterintuitive to what we think. When a problem arises, where our mind will naturally go is, I'm losing something, as I said earlier.

11:34I'm taking a step backwards. But the actual arrival of the problem, its mere presence in your life, is an indicator you're on the road to progress. Otherwise, it wouldn't be there. It's an impediment to the next level, but it's an indicator of progress. These are all things you must know and believe to be true so you take the right meaning away so you make the right decisions. Number one thing you must do, define reality. What does this really mean? What is really happening right now? Not the story you've already started to tell yourself about what's happening, but can you get clear? Can you step out of your own situation and look at the problem from an independent perspective, from an unbiased perspective, and define reality?

12:16What really is the challenge? What really is the problem without telling your story about it? We all begin to tell an immediate story. Here we go again. People always do this to me. I'm going to lose that. I've made a better decision here. And what we do at this stage way too early is we begin to assign blame. Blame should never be assigned in the problem-solving process. That is post-mortem. That is after you're done solving the problem, and it is dead. The mistake we make is we start to tell the story and whose fault it is. It's my fault. It's their fault. And what happens is that depletes our energy.

12:50It distracts our focus from the solution, and it begins this story that we start stacking ourselves. So when that tendency comes up in you that need that behavior that pattern who's to blame whose fault is it? This takes you away from the solution. It does not solve the problem. It magnifies the problem always remember this We will assign blame when it's over. I'm all about the solution laser focused on the solution See the ability to get laser focused on something in life You can obliterate things in life. You can achieve such massive things if you begin to build the muscle of eliminating distractions Eliminating the stories eliminating the stress and getting perfect clarity on where you really are and the number one stressor The number one distraction is who's to blame?

13:39What's my story before it's even been solved? We want to assign blame that is a distraction. Don't do it number two You have to get a clear vision of what you want. Like exactly what do you want when this problem is solved? What do you want to be happening different than it is now specifically? It can't be a general thing. It can't be that you want to eliminate this. What is it exactly that I want with specificity, with clarity? Because this laser focus now, I can move towards a solution if I'm clear on what it is. Which is number three. Once I'm clear on what it is, get resourceful. Once you've figured out exactly what it is in number two, the third step is to get totally resourceful about solving the problem.

14:18What does that mean? Who are the people that can help you? The resources, the places, the things, the circumstances, the collaborations. Who is it that you might need to talk to who solved a similar problem in your life? What are the resources available to you? The more you begin to point out to yourself, I have all these resources at my disposal, the more your anxiety and stress level begins to go down, and it's true. Are there problems like this you've solved in the past something similar in the past you've solved or somebody else has solved? Most people get very unresourceful. They feel like there's no hope no help.

14:49So ask yourself How do I get resourceful? What are my resources here? And then the last thing if I could just say this to you that are people of faith or if you plug into the universe Why don't you embrace the fact and the belief that you're being guided? That there's a blessing happening in your life or that you can plug into something that's got great answers for you There's resources everywhere for you for those of you that are people or faith Or even if you're somebody who you don't have a specific religion, but you plug into the energy of the world Why is it that when a problem arises we abandon our God we abandon our faith We abandon the fact that we're guided we abandoned the higher consciousness that we believe in Why is it that when a problem arises?

15:29We abandon that why don't you believe you're guided my great resource is my contacts my friends my previous experience Maybe the people around me that I can talk to. But my biggest one is my God. I'm being guided. I'm being blessed. I'm favored. Plug into that divine inspiration, that divine understanding. If you pray for their guidance or you pray for their help, you pray for their will, right? And you can pray for the information as well. So begin to feel you're guided. Get super resourceful is the third step. The fourth empowering question you just ask yourself very quickly. What can I learn from this?

16:04People say to me, that's really difficult to do in the middle of the problem. No, it's not. It's just something that's a habit you've not built yet. What can I learn from this? What's the learning experience? Because as you're learning as you go, this problem is less likely to repeat itself in our lives. There's nothing wrong with making mistakes. There's nothing wrong with even having problems. There's a challenge if we continue to repeat the same mistake that causes the same problems. And so what can I learn from this? Now you're leveraging this problem to grow. Now this isn't something you're just overcoming and putting behind you, but you're using this experience in this challenge to move in front of it Not just get it behind you.

16:40There's a big difference in that perspective. What's great about this problem? That's a difficult question to ask when you're going through the middle of it Ed No, it's not not if you build the habit not if you begin to think like this Because what that does is it changes the meaning to you it puts you in an empowering state and not a disempowering state So what is great about this? There are always great things in having problems and challenges whether it's going to be that you'll be more prepared next time Are you going to put things in place that will prevent it from happening next time? Or what you're going to learn from it or how you're going to grow from it or who you're going to connect with from it or the other Ancillary things are going to be improved or the fact that it just gives you a challenge and keeps you alive, right?

17:15But what's great about the problem? It just helps you take the right meaning the more we can get in the right state in the right meaning The more we're going to be able to do the three things we talked about which is make that decision Load ourselves with certainty and take massive insane action. Number five, what's not perfect yet? And that question is different than what's great. What's not perfect yet? And you begin to understand what could make it more perfect. It helps you refine and get more specific and it helps you with your certainty. Number six, what am I willing to do to make it the way I want it?

17:46This is important because there will be things in a minute you're not willing to do. But what are you willing to do? Is it an expenditure of money, time, resources? calling in a favor with somebody, calling a meeting, willing to call a friend about something. What are you willing to do to make it the way you want it? And that leads to number seven. What are you not willing to do to make it the way you want it? Maybe there's an extent you will not go to to solve this problem. There's a level to which you will go. There are things you won't do. It might be, I won't compromise my integrity. I won't lie.

18:17I'm not going to spend more than this money on it or this time or this resource or this energy. this is important to quantify as well because it helps create for us more certainty and it gives us more clarity. I won't do this. I won't cheat. I won't be unethical. I won't raise my voice. I won't ruin a relationship over this. It might be with a person at your job or who works for you and they're creating a problem for you. I've had situations like this. A few weeks ago, one of my colleagues was not holding up their end of the bargain on their work and I wanted to solve that problem and I thought about how I could grow from it, what was good about it, what I could learn from it.

18:52I got resourceful about it. I decided what I was willing to do, but I also decided what I wasn't willing to do. And what I wasn't willing to do to solve this problem was to ruin that relationship with this person, was to hurt their self-confidence, was to give them more pain and anxiety and worry in their own life. Because I knew part of that was the reason they were struggling that created the problem in the first place. Their own pain, their own anxiety, their own worry, their own fears helped create this problem I was solving and I was unwilling to contribute more to that to solve it. And then lastly, how can I enjoy the process?

19:27Wouldn't it be nice to enjoy the process of overcoming challenges and problems rather than always being a grind, always being something we hate, always being painful? Sometimes challenges and problems are just painful things we're going to get through. But these questions can empower you to make it less this way. And so ask yourself that question, what can I do to enjoy this? Because the more you can find enjoyment in the process of something that's going to always be in your life, just think about this. We have this sort of fantasy that if I can get rich enough, or I can get in the perfect relationship, or I have the best business, or maybe if I just don't do anything and I retire someday, I won't have problems and challenges in my life.

20:06Now, we consciously know that's not true, but it's sort of the fantasy we live with. And now that I point that out, you go, that is crazy. Of course, I'm always going to have these things. So since you have an acceptance that problems and challenges are going to exist, isn't it probably important that you learn to enjoy the process of overcoming them and solving them? I think all the time, how can I enjoy this? I think, man, what are all the great things that are going to happen when this is solved? Whose lives are going to be better when this is solved? And that helps me enjoy the process. I also remind myself this problem is helping me grow.

20:36It's in existence because I'm making progress in my life. So all these things fit a meaning that help us make the best decisions possible. And then finally, I want to give you four things that I think are mandatory in solving problems. Number one, all problems must be solved on paper. And I'll substitute paper for a keyboard. But I think they need to be written out problems. There's a process that happens and a clarity of thought when we move the problem just out of our mind where all the emotions are and onto a piece of paper where we get resourceful and we get specific. And so all problems in the 15 % category need to be solved on paper.

21:13When you write them down, you begin to see them. Also, by putting the problem outside of your mind and on a piece of paper, you remove yourself from the emotion of the problem and you become outside the problem and your perspective changes simply by writing it. It gives you a different level of awareness to solve the problem from. It removes you from it and the emotion oftentimes, and it gives you a worldview, a perspective of above it That's different than when you're in it in your head number two as we talked earlier about being clear on what you want But I also want to attach to that having a perspective as to why you want it So not only being very clear about what you want But why you want it and then ask yourself inside that question.

21:52How do I know when it was solved what evidence what would need to happen? What do I exactly want? Why do I want it? And what's the evidence that it was solved so that you will move past it So that is something that is now behind you, but more importantly you are in front of it Third is always remember decisions are made on probability. Once you've made that decision, right, what have we talked about? Flood yourself with certainty and take massive action. But all decisions are made on probability, meaning there's never a perfect plan. You may make a decision to solve a problem that doesn't work, but what we're trying to do is make a decision that gives us the highest probability of solving it.

22:24So make all your decisions based on probability, not perfection. If you're sitting here waiting for the perfect solution, or if it doesn't work, or you've had any experience in your life when you tried to solve something and didn't work, you've had any experience in your life. happen, you're setting up an unfair standard for yourself. Problem solving is about probability, so make sure you're making a decision that gives you the highest probability of solving it. And then fourth, all decisions need what I call like value clarity. Often you're going to have several results you could choose from to solve a problem, or there'll be several results when you solve the problem, and you've got to be clear about their order of importance.

22:57Sometimes one problem has three or four problems connected to it, or the solution of it will cause three or four different things. So it's getting clarity on importance level of solving the problem in its order. And then finally I want to remind you of one thing on solving anything in your life on making any change whether it's solving a problem or just taking your life to a different level. The pathway to the best solutions the pathway to great change in our life is always 75 % what I'd call psychology or thinking and 25 % of it is the actual physical execution of the problem. So So when you're making the decisions, focus 75 % on the psychology and the mindset, 25 % on the execution.

23:35And so if you're thinking that the wealthier you get or the more successful you get, the fewer problems you're going to have, that's not the case. And all the people that are achieving in their life right now are nodding their heads across the world listening to this because they would all tell you, and you could tell this too, you have more problems now than you did when you were a kid. Right now in your life, if you're at a higher level than you were five years ago, there are more frequent problems and sometimes even bigger problems as you progress in life. That's why it's so true that problems and challenges are an indication of progress.

24:07Show me the size of your problem and I will show you the size of your success and frankly the size and scope of your life. I'm telling you, as someone whose life's grown pretty substantially the last 25 or 30 years, I don't have fewer problems. I have more and they're not smaller, they're bigger and every one of them is such a wonderful opportunity for me to grow and to change and to experience to help other people, but it's also been an indication all the way in my life of progress. I'd be terrified. I'd be miserable. I'd be concerned if my life started to not have problems on a regular basis and challenges.