They Didn’t Think They Were Good Enough...Until They Did This | Ed Mylett

20:22Ed Mylett:one of the most inspirational people, I think, on earth today with me. And she was also, I always put these polls out to you guys saying, who do you want on my show? And there kept being this name come up, this beautiful name by the way, Fallon Taylor, Fallon Taylor, get her on your show. And so I'm so excited that she's here today. This lady to my left is amazing. She's an incredible entrepreneur. She's got an amazing social media and YouTube presence, but she's probably best known for being a world barrel racing champion. And not only is that extraordinary, but she did that after breaking her neck and having a 2 % chance to even ever walk again.

20:58Ed Mylett:And she comes back and wins the what is really the world series of barrel racing so I'm so excited for you guys to

21:04Michael Chandler:hear this story so thank you for being here thank you so much I really am excited to be here so guys

21:09Ed Mylett:now here we go just so you know if you're driving the car you need to grip your steering wheel a little bit tighter because this is about to get really good like really hugely inspiring if you're on the treadmill at the gym you're about to go from level 7 to level 10 like that and if you're watching YouTube this is the part where you bring your kids in the room and you say watch this okay So tell them what happens. You're starting to make your comeback. Guys, this is one of the most amazing stories you're going to hear. So you're making your comeback. And what happens?

21:39Michael Chandler:Well, I'd like to tell you my mantra. It's going to get rocky. And I'm going to tell you the mantra that my dad told me the whole time throughout my entire career and me being very risky was, whatever you do, don't end up in a hospital because you'll die in there. Wow. And, you know, it just kind of rang in my head because I was riding dangerous horses and I was doing a lot of training. And then I started training around the clock because of the weather and I needed my bills paid. And I'm riding, riding, riding and taking chances that I shouldn't have had to take, you know, just because I was not understanding my growth and I wasn't understanding my contribution.

22:10Michael Chandler:And so I was training really late at night in August in 2009. And I'm riding this horse that's fine. Everything's fine. We're training. Everything's normal. My poor staff member was there with her boyfriend and it's just us lonely at night, lights on in the arena. and I'm going to train this horse. And as I was taking off around the arena, this horse slipped kind of in a mud puddle. And it was not a big deal. You know, whatever. He slips, and he was feeling frisky. And you kind of know that when a horse behaves a certain way, he's feeling a little frisky. I should have known better. I should have taken more precautions.

22:45If I didn't, it's what I do for a living.

22:47Michael Chandler:What's the big deal? And I start laughing. I start giggling. And this horse starts to buck. And when I say buck, you know, horses can play and buck, and they can crow hop and buck. This horse did something that's like a wild instinct. So he reared up when he did. He broke all the bones on this side of my face. And when he came down to the ground, I'm still laughing. I'm like, okay, whatever. And, you know, in the cowboy industry, it's got to be tough, you know. And so I start to pull this horse up. And as I do, he hits me in the head again. And I skull fracture in four places. Of course, I don't know this.

23:20Michael Chandler:And, of course, I'm not wearing a helmet because that's just not the cool, tough thing to do. and he begins to buck a little bit more and I just decide that I'm gonna pick a place off over here to jump off which is a terrible idea but I picked a place to kind of jump off and when I did he kicked my feet about 13 or 14 feet in the air and I landed straight down on my head my legs just kind of flopped over and I was unable to move I was paralyzed right in that moment and what a tough place to be in you know because I was in this horrible relationship and in a spot where I'm like who's gonna save me you know so all I have is my career if I get hurt I can't make a living how am I gonna take care of myself I'm in this horrible place how am I gonna get up I gotta get up and so my friend came over I was strapped down to a picnic table because I was too cheap to ride an ambulance.

24:20Michael Chandler:So I get taken in a pickup truck on a, on a, in a pickup truck on a picnic table to the hospital. And I get there and I start joking with the, the staff because it's just my way. And the lady in the front desk, um, my friend went in and asked for a gurney. And she said, you don't need a gurney. That girl's out there telling jokes, quit being so dramatic. So my friend that was a paramedic, they take me in and they finally get me a gurney. I could have, I could have walked. I think, I think I could have, but when I got through the MRI machine and joking with the, um, the doctor that was helping me, I kept telling him, you know, Hooters closes in 15 minutes and we're really close now.

25:02Michael Chandler:Like, let's go get some food. Tell me I have a concussion. Let's get out of here. And he came back in the room. He said, you have a 2 % chance to live. And he said, it's really been touching to get to know you. But he said, the plane's running and you have 13 minute flight to think about your life. And I hope that you really take that time to think about what you're going to do now, because you're never going to ride horses again. And I'll never forget getting, I don't know why I remember the guys' names. They were two guys named Russell that carried me to the plane and had me on this, you know, in the sea collar and strapped to the table.

25:38And I get to.

25:40Ed Mylett:Can someone get me some tissue, please? Someone grab one. Thank you.

25:43Michael Chandler:I get to the hospital room and there's a whole nother story in the hospital but I was told again I have two percent chance to live that I would never walk again the neurosurgeon told me I was an absolute idiot for riding horses thank you they don't stop they come down and it's over beautiful so I had I had a second to think and all I could think of was my dad telling me you know you're gonna die in a hospital you can't don't die in a hospital I'm like this is crazy superstition that you're gonna die in a hospital and I wake up the next day heavily drugged obviously with a halo on I had a girlfriend in the hospital tell me they're gonna offer you two scenarios you can get the surgery with the box in your neck or you can get the halo they're gonna shave your head you're gonna have holes in your head she said go that way I've seen this go a bunch of different ways so when the doctor came in I started bawling and I was like, I want the halo.

26:44Michael Chandler:You know, all I can think of is this cage on my head. I want the halo. At this point, I've called my mom and dad and told them that I was in a fender bender because they're with their grandkids in California. And I'm like, I'm in a fender bender. Everything's fine. It's all fine. It's going to be fine. And I've got to figure out a way to get out of this hospital. So I get these nurses that come in and I say, Hey, how can I get out of here? Because now I've got this real embedded childhood fear that I'm going to die in a hospital. and I've got a damn good chance at this point with the situation I'm in.

27:14Jason Wilson:It's actually true. I could die in here.

27:16Michael Chandler:So shout out to all the amazing medical professionals because it's just my own superstition. They did an amazing job. One came in. I said, I need to get out of here. And she laughed at me and she said, well, you know, when you can walk from one end of the hall to the other, then they'll let you out. But you're not going to do that. You've got a long time. You need to settle in. You've got about six months. You're going to be here. So the next nurse came in. And she said, she laughed at me and she goes, you know, she's writing, you've got six months. You know, you just like settle in. And then the next lady came in really late on shift and she was amazing.

27:50Michael Chandler:And if I could find her, I would give her everything I've got. She came in and I said, how do I get out of here? I got to get out of here. I really got to get out of here. And she said, well, you walk to the end of the hall and you come back, you can get out. And I said, well, let's do that. How do we do that? Wow. She said, well, you got to get up. And the big risk is, you know, if and when you fall down, you know, you can wiggle your fingers and toes. And that's good. But when you get up, it's not going to feel like you thought it was. And you've got all this equipment on your head. You're going to hit the ground.

28:22Michael Chandler:And then you could die. And I was like, well, they've given me terrible odds at this point. So what the hell? And it was just very cool. This lady, that moment, she has no idea what she did for me. because she was just like, just, well, you know, I'm willing to try it. So she takes the belt and she ties it to the ceiling. And I get up and I fall down just like she said I would. And then she said, if you just put one foot in front of the other, you know, you can get down to the end of the hall. And it could take you months, but we're going to try it. Wow. It took me about an hour and a half. And I got up and down the end of the hall.

28:57Michael Chandler:And I took all the people that didn't believe me, you know, the lady at the front desk and the nurses that came in. And I said, tomorrow I'm going to deliver flowers to each and every one of you guys because you didn't believe. And maybe I can change your mind because other people are going to come in here. Oh, my God. And they need to know they can walk. And so the next day, I gathered up all my strength. Mom at this point knows that I've had, I've been structurally destroyed is what I was told. She got called from actually a newspaper outlet that was interviewing for rodeo publication that had leaked my medical records.

29:33Michael Chandler:So my parents found out in that way. So now I've got to do damage control and learn to walk. And I told mom, I said, we got to go to the florist. I made him a promise. And so it was a really cool scene to watch all of these people that just didn't believe instead of me being angry at these people that didn't believe in my journey to just shine a light on it and show them a different way. So I went and got floral arrangements for every single person that told me I couldn't do it. And I walked in there and I walked to each of their offices. and I think hopefully I gave them a gift that they can always have.

30:07You're amazing.

30:08Michael Chandler:You might not believe how I'm going to do it but it gave me a lot of clarity too. Sometimes you're just not asking the right person. Wow. You know?

30:19Ed Mylett:Wow. I think everybody should just literally go back and listen to all of this again. Thank you. You make this, honestly I'm going to tell you something this is like such a blessing to be here with you.

30:30Michael Chandler:Thank you.

30:31Ed Mylett:It's a blessing to be here with you. Thank you. I'm really moved right now. Thank you. And I'm trying to not get too moved so that I can still ask you questions. It has a happy ending.

30:41Michael Chandler:I know. It's such a happy ending.

30:44Ed Mylett:I know we're going to go to there, but it's a happy ending because of everything you just said. That there's so many things in there that we all have these people who don't believe in us and we're scared.

30:55Michael Chandler:And they're scared too. They're scared to tell me I can walk down the hall because they know I can't. They're scared too.

31:02Ed Mylett:And maybe that's true for so many people where you have these people in your life that are close to you that are maybe pulling you down. Maybe they're just scared for you. Maybe they're scared for them and you're going to leave them too, right? Absolutely. And everything that you have. And I just want to acknowledge you like you're freaking amazing. Thank you. Like you're amazing. and um i just now just to be clear with everybody this break was very serious very similar to christopher reeve right and i mean not all that dissimilar injury it's not it's the same injury

31:31Michael Chandler:so when you break your c2 that's what controls your head going left or right um and you have a very very very small chance of making it out on the other side with a lot of neck breaks this would be the one that you really don't want to happen.

31:47Ed Mylett:Unbelievable. I'm picturing you there. I mean, you tell the story so well, I can actually picture you. And I'm so proud of you. I mean, you're just remarkable. And everybody that just heard this, I told them they were going to be moved, but I didn't even know until you told it in front of me how much it would move me. It puts in perspective so many things that I think are big obstacles in my life that really aren't. Sure. And so many things that I think are a really big deal, and they're not. and that is a big deal.

32:14Michael Chandler:You wake up and wiggle your fingers and your toes tomorrow, you're going to be like, oh, okay. My gosh.

32:19Ed Mylett:We're all okay. Just amazing. And so now it gets actually more amazing now. Thank you, yes. So you go through the process of rebuilding yourself and then you make the crazy decision, it would seem to me, to actually get back on a horse again, right? So what was that like and what was the first time like, if you don't mind sharing that as well?

32:40Michael Chandler:It was horrible and I would love to share it. I was like Ricky Bobby in the race car. I'm killing it. And then you look over and people are like, yeah, you're doing really great, sweetie. You're walking. This is great. And so I thought, you know, learning to walk again is a pretty big hurdle. It's pretty tough. Yeah. And then learning to ride again and you get over the path that, okay, I'm going to do this again. And the neurosurgeon's telling me I shouldn't do this again. Sure. Okay, now I'm going to wear some helmets. I'm gonna get him to wear a helmet and I'm gonna I'm gonna actually do this thing the right way and then I started thinking about I wonder if other people have had these things and I start to read everybody's story and I start to wonder if the human mind can comprehend getting up and walking out of a hospital when you've been told a two percent chance maybe I can go back to 14 year old me that wanted a world title and let's do this thing and let's actually give it a shot And I thought if I can have a goal big enough that makes my future look brighter than my past, then that will keep me hooked towards something that I want so badly.

33:46Michael Chandler:You know, because we're all going to lose and you're going to suck and you're going to go broke doing it. And you're going to have people that don't want you to do it. And you're going to fail ultimately and keep getting up and dust off and fail. But if the thing is so bright that you have to walk toward it, you'll stay hooked. and I stayed hooked and I had a horse in my front pasture, just a small brief rundown. I had a horse in my front pasture that the trainer told me nobody could ride. And I thought, well, that would be pretty cool. I'm going to go get that one.

34:16Ed Mylett:Oh my gosh.

34:17Michael Chandler:So I got that horse that was raised on my place. And, um, I actually, her, her mom and dad was the horses I went to the national finals on when I was a kid. And I was like, I'm going to, I'm going to ride this thing. And I trained her. and within a year, we were already fighting for another chance back to the National Finals Rodeo. What? Which is just unheard of. And she's just been...

34:40Ed Mylett:Is this baby flow? This is baby flow.

34:42Michael Chandler:Okay. So that was a really cool part of my journey. And then I hit another road bump, just what I think everybody does. I qualified for the National Finals Rodeo in 2013. And here I am. I'm ready to go. And I'm going to show the world. and I go in and I was terrible on TV 10 days in a row. It was just the worst ever. And I thought, well, there went the walking miracle thing. Like now they're just like, she's a walking miracle that doesn't ride very good.

35:09Ed Mylett:Oh my gosh.

35:10Michael Chandler:Here we go.

35:10Ed Mylett:Okay. It's pretty big walking miracle to be there, but I understand what a letdown. Here I go.

35:16Michael Chandler:Cause I've got this career and you know, people have known that I've already been and here's my comeback 20 years later, 25 years later, or whatever it is, and boom, and I'm terrible on this big platform. And I thought, man, I've got to do this better.

35:30Ed Mylett:Was that what you were thinking, Steele? I've got to do it better. But were you super depressed, super bummed out for a while? I just want to have people understand what they're saying.

35:38Michael Chandler:So the season ends September 30th, or is it September 31st? End of September, okay? October 1st, it begins. So you have a 24 hour span to be really depressed or get it together. And it was in that moment. I was like, okay, I've got to do this again. I got to do this again. And, um, I want to show my parents what my horse can do. And if I just put that, that is my big light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe I put that in front of the world title. Maybe I just scale it back. Maybe I just do this one thing of just, I want to show my face on TV again, running my horse as this person with this cool comeback story and I want to make a difference and I want to show that nobody show me stats nobody show me numbers nobody talk about anything I qualified back third in the world the girl that was winning it was a sure thing second place was the sure thing third place was the girl that blows it on tv but let's all feel sorry for her you know because the next thing so I come back and and I decided that I'm going to put my head down and I don't want to talk about anything but just focusing on one foot in front of the other just like I did

36:49Ed Mylett:before because that's been my formula literally like learning to literally one foot in front of

36:53Jason Wilson:the other so you know how when you're doing something that's good for you and then you stop doing it all of a sudden you feel what the heck changed so here's what happened to me I've

37:01Ed Mylett:been feeling great for like a year and a half it's because I've been on IM8 then we moved to our place in Maine and I didn't bring my supplement with me so if you've been looking for something easy to stick with that actually makes you feel better, this might be it. For me, it absolutely is something I rely on and I notice when I missed a few days. So give your body what it deserves with IM8.

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37:49Ed Mylett:This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

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38:21Michael Chandler:So I get on my horse. Round one comes. I've never won a round at the National Finals Rodeo at this point. I've made like 50 runs in that arena. Never won. I've placed. Before breaking your neck. Before breaking my neck. I'd done good. My 51st run, I win it. I told all my staff, all my friends, everybody. I said, let's go home. Wrap it up. I don't want to make the other nine runs. I'm done. Victory. Let's go. So then I thought, well, if we just keep doing this one foot in front of the other thing, let's just keep doing that. So run by run, the sure thing girl just starts slipping down the pack.

38:54Michael Chandler:Boom, boom, boom. And then here I am. And of course, you know, there's people that love you and hate you in sports. So I'm getting, you know, people that think I'm ridiculous and people that think that I'm great and, you know, whatever. It's polarizing. It's fun for the fans. But the sure thing second place girl, she's really a sure thing. And she just starts going. And she's doing great. I'm doing great. And I look up to her so much. So, you know, it's cool for us to be kind of in this battle. And something I've never said before, I think, on any of my social media is that the 10th round that would determine the champion, in.

39:28Michael Chandler:She came up to me and she shook my hand and she said, well, you've done really great. And I'm just super excited for you. And I thought I just won the world title because I realized that she hadn't celebrated yet. And I already had, and in my mind, I had my outfit picked out and I was going to be wearing gold because the gold buckle and I was going to be the gold title holder. And I would have this gold. And I knew that when I walked in, I would jump up and down and I would have this gold buckle in my hand and I was like, wow, if I just don't mess this up, this is gonna, this is gonna work. And I went in, she made a beautiful run.

40:06Michael Chandler:It was great. And they swung the gate open for me to go. And my dad's standing right beside me. And I was like, man, this would be a really bad time to screw this up. Wouldn't it? Just put one foot in front of the other. Don't try anything fancy. And I think that's been something that I've held with me so long, that's so effective go in and I made my run and I come out and I look at the board and I'm the winner I'm the winner and of course I lose it and I'm losing it and the cameras are coming in the you know ESPN's here and CBS is here and all of them are coming around and I look at my dad and he was like you just you just won the world I was like I'm gonna go jump on that stage just like I did in my head really quick and it was so cool and they you know whisk me off and here I go down into the bottom and just a funny, funny story is the security guard said you didn't win it.

40:53Michael Chandler:They made a mistake. It's someone else and I was like someone needs to get me a bucket because I am for sure going to vomit right now. And they came back and said it's amazing. We actually give the victory lap to the person that wins the average and you didn't win the average but you won the world. And it's such a cool thing because in my mind I was shooting for the average. And I wanted to win this, you know, the aggregate. I wanted to be the most consistent person because that's what everybody told me I couldn't be. And I ended up with the world title. So yeah, you don't always get what you want.

41:22Michael Chandler:Sometimes you get something so much cooler.

41:25Ed Mylett:So much better. So it's gotta be, I mean, listen, first it should be a movie.

41:29Michael Chandler:Thank you.

41:30Ed Mylett:I mean, for sure. And all of my producer friends that are watching this, like, hello, I'll have to give you your Instagram in a minute. It should be a movie. It's an unfreaking believable story. Like, like even hearing it now, look at me. Like I'm just, it's so remarkable what you've achieved and and and still continue to achieve too but i just tell you like just so you know i've had a just for me like this is such a gift for me like i i do shows and i love doing them but today is a gift for me like you're remarkable you inspire me the

42:00Michael Chandler:story the way you tell it i can't wait for this to go to your audience and people to see it because

42:05Ed Mylett:i know somebody is struggling well of course they are and like you embody see some people like i talk about these things that's great you embody it you've lived it you are it like it's you you're evidence of it like you're living proof that the things you teach and talk about are real right like there's someone right next to me right now who's living proof that you can accomplish anything that you were washed up in your mind you were a has-been it was over so many things i believed

42:33Michael Chandler:about myself that i hear people go i'm too old and i go how old are you 21 and i'm like what is wrong with the world like no you're fine I don't think anybody at 95 is too old to do something

42:45Ed Mylett:really cool with their life do you struggle let's go through some things about you like it's hard to move off that just to be honest with you like um I'm actually right on the verge right here I'm trying to not do what you're doing so um I'm waterworks I can keep us going all day one of us have to not be right it should be my turn by the way I should be allowed to um on the inside I certainly am my audience knows me well enough too by the way I I must tell you that it's just it's remarkable to me the way that you just articulate it too it's so beautiful but um you though let's talk about you for a minute because I think men can relate to what you're going to talk about here in a minute too but really women can too you strike me as I've gotten to know you a little bit that you still do struggle with some of these things whether it be your maybe even which is amazing but even some of your own confidence even to this day is that is that true and how tell them a little bit about that part of you still and how you navigate through

43:42Michael Chandler:confidence is something that I think everyone when you walk into a space you can feel somebody really confident coming out of that space and when I help people whether it be with horses or with anything that I help with the first thing that I find is that they believe something that's so wildly untrue about themselves and it's so deeply ingrained in themselves that they just they they can't get away from that belief of themself. And for mine it was, I'm too old to make a comeback, or I'm too injured to get to the gym, or I've already accomplished all that I can accomplish anyway. Or for me it's like, oh well I always need to have a six pack and be in perfect professional athletic shape.

44:20Michael Chandler:And what's so untrue about that is, how many people would love to have my body type? How many people would love to be in my position? How many people, if dealt my hand, could play it so much better? how many people um you know if you just take a look around at people that i'm able to help you know i've i've helped people that weren't even able to leave their home that just need inspiration to be able to they were you know in such a place with their obesity that they're not able to even stand up how do you tell that person that you don't feel great about your body how do you tell that person that you're not able to take advantage of all the opportunities in your life there's always somebody in your position.

44:58Michael Chandler:There's people that I've met with without limbs that are doing more than I've been able to accomplish. So in your position, what are those things that have tied you to that thought that have kept you from where you're going? It's like the elephant tied to the chair, you know? The elephant can just walk away.

45:15Ed Mylett:Yeah, and he's so used to believing he can't. He stays right there.

45:19Jason Wilson:Before we start the interview with my next guest, just want to remind you all that you can subscribe to the show on YouTube or follow the show on Apple or Spotify. We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now on with the show. Hey everybody, Ed Milet. I'm so excited to be back with you today with another program on the Max Out Show. We bring you people all the time that have maxed out areas of their life that are the best in the world. And the gentleman to my left, the reason I've been after him to do this show for so long is because I think he's maxing out multiple areas of his life.

45:51Jason Wilson:The obvious area is that this is one of the greatest boxers of the last two decades, and you might even argue in the history of the sport. And so the gentleman to my left here is retired this last year to be a year ago this week, 32-0, 32-0, has not lost a fight since he was 14 years old, and was an Olympic gold medalist, went on to win the Super 6 tournament in the Super Middleweight division, and was a light heavyweight champion of the world. And so So this is one of the greatest athletes, but I think one of the great men in the United States. So Andre Ward, thank you for being here today.

46:23Dean Graziosi:Appreciate it, man. Thanks for having me.

46:24Jason Wilson:Let's talk a little boxing. We got to go there. We'll talk some family. Let's talk some boxing. So I'm curious. I'm a big boxing fan. So when you became on my radar was during the Super 6 tournament. Okay. So that was, and they called that the super middleweight division at the time, correct?

46:44Dean Graziosi:Yeah, super middleweight, 168 pounds.

46:45Jason Wilson:But basically, I'm paraphrasing, Showtime got together and said, let's just find the best one in the world.

46:49Ed Mylett:They put the sixth of you in this tournament. It ended up being a seventh dude or something. Wasn't Jermaine Taylor in it originally?

46:54Dean Graziosi:Well, there were guys that, like, guys would get knocked out or get injured, and then they'd replace them. But the court was always six.

46:59Jason Wilson:So, again, you had Kessler. You had Frocked or Frock, whatever they call them. There's some dudes in this tournament, right? Yeah. And you ended up winning that tournament. I'm curious, when it started at that level, was that a new level for you? And like, did you have fear? Like, did you wonder whether you were the man of those six?

47:19Ed Mylett:How'd that work for you?

47:21Dean Graziosi:I had to drop everything. We went, we got in the car, got back to San Diego, flew to the Bay Area, literally dropped my family off, packed a bag, double ear infection, got on a red eye, went to Germany, and was there the next morning to announce the second leg of the Super 6 and was this close to not being a part of it.

47:39Jason Wilson:That's crazy. And the way they filmed it, everybody.

47:42Ed Mylett:By the way, this was so powerful. All this 24-7 stuff you see now, this was kind of the original of that. Yeah, it was. And it was so well done. It really changed to some extent how boxing was promoted on either Showtime or HBO2, the way they laid it out. But I watched it closely, and you weren't the dude they were sort of steering the cameras towards in the beginning.

47:59Jason Wilson:I mean, it was really interesting. It was the other guys that I've mentioned before. And I remember you won, then you won again. I'm like, oh, this dude's got a chance to win this whole tournament.

48:08Ed Mylett:So every one of these fights, just curious, when you went into it, I just want to know how a world-class person thinks or doesn't think. You're there at that thing in Germany. You see these other five dudes. Are you like, I'm going to win this tournament?

48:21Dean Graziosi:I've always had that belief. My professional career was guided very meticulously. The powers that be, the networks, the suits, the promoters, they want bang for their buck. They want to make the most money as quickly as possible. And I had opportunities to fight some of the guys that were in the tournament maybe a year or two earlier. And it was for more money than I'd ever seen and, you know, great opportunity. And, you know, I called Verge like, man, they're going to give us, you know,$600 ,000. And we get to fight on, you know, HBO and this and that or Showtime. And he said, no, no. He said, hold on.

48:58Dean Graziosi:He said, I understand that, you know, if we say no to this, internally there's going to be some blowback. but he said, you know, when we fight these guys, I want you to be a full grown man and I want you to destroy him. Like I don't want you to be barely winning or barely eking by. And we did that like two or three times before the Super 6 happened and we get blowback and some of the blowback spilled publicly where fans are saying, oh, you know, Ward's, he's a gold medalist, but he's moving too slow. And that's the heat you take. That's the bullseye you have on your back coming in with a gold medal.

49:29but in germany i really saw what the intent was you had mickle kessler who was mickle kessler at

49:40Dean Graziosi:the time he's like 42 and one or something like that but like i don't know how many knockouts he had more knockouts than i had fights you had carl frotch who was from the uk and you had arthur abraham and then you had three americans jermaine taylor who was teetering he was still relevant but he was teetering on on kind of being done you had the young guy andre derail and then you had the other young guy and myself and i could tell that everybody that was there they just looked at us like we were just a token just to be there like these guys are making interesting some namesake young guys coming up but these guys these are the guys that are supposed to win yes and i took exception to that to the personal i took exception to that and i got on the phone i called verse him and they don't they don't really expect me to win this he said oh yeah i know he said it's always been like that he said but just watch unwavering faith he's always that pillar and and again that jumped off on me it's already confident but now now it was personal now it was personal your

50:38Jason Wilson:physiology changes so dramatically you go into your virgil thing you and your dad and at that time kessler and frotch were like rock stars in their various countries too right they were big

50:50Dean Graziosi:names i don't blame anybody for not picking us like i probably wouldn't have picked me i was a young guy yeah i had the gold medal but i hadn't done anything as a pro my biggest win was a guy named edison miranda who was a beast he was a top contender right that was my biggest win as a professional so i don't blame anybody for not picking me but i was also going to use that as fuel and ammunition as well i was going to use it so he goes on to win that like he wins everything

51:18Jason Wilson:else this is the thing you said through i just want to hear everybody everyone just hear things I hear that I think are important. I do think that there are times in your life where if you don't jump on an opportunity, you will regret it the rest of your life. That there's timing to when you win.

51:32Ed Mylett:There are moments, and you've said this a few times where Virgil said this to you. And for a lot of you that are chasing what you're chasing, you may get fatigued with that chase, but there's got to be this part that goes, if I don't jump on this now, this may never come again for me. So your timing is so critical. Winning the Super 6 tournament was a huge catalyst. Let's talk some boxing stuff just for me. Because I want to know some stuff. Let's do it. I'm curious.

51:54Jason Wilson:When you, I told you I was going to ask you this, and you haven't told me the answer, so I'm curious. Forget the training part just for a second. We're going to get to that. You are getting wrapped. You're about to go out, okay, for a big fight. You're getting wrapped up.

52:07Ed Mylett:I'm sure Virgil's talking to you. You're going through whatever your game plan was. What goes through you? Is there honest emotions here as a fighter? See, the thing about boxing to me is that it's different than every other sport. UFC has some of this as well, but the combat sports.

52:21Jason Wilson:This is a man and a man. I think people forget this. Like, even when you bat as a baseball hitter, there's another dude coming up after you. If you ground out, the other dude could get the hit, right? This is a man and a man.

52:33Ed Mylett:And I'm just curious, when you have that happening, you're getting, look at your physiology changed again, right? But I'm just curious, like, when you're getting wrapped at that moment, what's going through you emotionally? What's happening to you at that time?

52:46Dean Graziosi:That moment can break a lot of men. You can have a great training camp. Everything can be clicking. You could have a great fight week leading up to that moment. And that moment, as well as the walk to the ring, you can lose it. Like you can lose your confidence. You can let fear overtake you. And you can somehow convince yourself that you're not worthy to be there in that moment. It's almost like an out-of-body experience. You hear people say, you know, a guy froze or, you know, he didn't he didn't perform or it was a deer in the headlights. Like, that's what they're talking about. Like you have it's almost like a surreal moment, like this this moment that you've been prepping for, talking about building up to the world has been talking about.

53:30Dean Graziosi:Like it's here and the fact that it's actually here, like it hits you in a in a in a in a different kind of way. Like you're getting wrapped and you have the commission from whatever state you're fighting. They're coming in and they're checking on you. They're giving you the countdown. We got 45 minutes. We got 30 minutes. We got 20. Then they come back in after you get your gloves back on and they say, we got five minutes. We're walking in two and a half minutes. And they start to count you down like whether you train good or not. That's running through your brain. Thinking about my wife and my kids.

54:03Dean Graziosi:I'm thinking about the fact that the whole world is literally going to be watching me in just a few moments. I'm thinking about my critics. They got a front row seat. They got a front row seat. Thinking about my supporters and the people that are riding with me, getting behind me. They got a front row seat. They're watching. They're pulling for me. It's like this controlled chaos that's going on. And it's literally an arena. It's with two gladiators getting ready to literally risk it all. Like boxing is the only sport, professional sport that I know of, that one loss can change your pay scale.

54:42Dean Graziosi:Like it's in the contract. If you lose a fight, your minimums can change. We can renegotiate those minimums. Like that's what's going through my head. And fear is very real. Really? Anxiety is very real. It's very present. And all the guys that say, I don't get nervous. I'm Iron Man. They're not being honest. Like that's very, very present. But that's where my faith, New Year's, comes in. And I start to believe beyond myself. I start to believe beyond the way that I'm feeling. Like we're called to walk by faith and not by sight. We're called to walk by faith and not by feeling. So fear is present, but courage is going in the midst of fear.

55:33Dean Graziosi:And I've had 32 fights before I retired. I had to do that every single time. It's not like, oh, this is the 25th time I've done this. It's easy because one punch can change your pace scale. One punch can change your life. And you're not guaranteed to walk out the same way you walked in. So all of that is going through your mind, running through your body, and you've got to channel it. You've got to process it, and you've got to believe, and you've got to be unwavering. And one thing I would always do was I would kind of just pace the locker room. and even though my team's in there, even though the commissioner's coming in and out, and again, this like controlled chaos, television cameras are in your face, producers are walking around, you hear the crowd, you hear the announcer, I would just talk to myself, it's my night, it's my night, I'm not going home without my belts, like those types of things, they may seem

56:27Fallon Taylor:corny to some people, but that stuff would really lift me up, and because a made-up mind

56:34Dean Graziosi:is a hard thing to break. And your mind has to be made up. Not walking to the ring or when you step through those rubs. Your mind has to be made up before you leave that locker room that I'm not going to be broken. I will not lose tonight. Oh, my gosh. You ever get there

56:54Ed Mylett:where you're at the stare down and look at a dude and know you got him? Has that ever happened? Or is it on a professional level you just don't know? Has it ever happened the reverse where you're in that state, You're in that faith state. You're in that strong state. And you've looked, you're like, oh, I got this fool. Has that ever happened? You don't have to tell me who.

57:10Dean Graziosi:Most times, no. Because as fighters, we can lie. We're good chameleons. Because in a sport of boxing, if you show weakness, the opponent's gonna pounce. So we hide a lot of our emotions. You know, you got some guys that are scared to death and they'll put a mask on. There's one time, one time in a 32 fight career that I knew I had a guy at the weigh-in. Chad Dawson.

57:37Jason Wilson:You knew and you even told me who it was and he by the way Chad Dawson's a great fighter Yes, how did you know? Why did you know?

57:45Dean Graziosi:He So you get a lot of rumors and you hear a lot of hearsay in training camp. Yeah, this guy, you know They'll call my coach and I stayed away from that stuff when my coach always had his ear To what was going on with my opponent and he would decide on what he would what he wanted to share and what he wouldn't want to share The guy Edison Miranda that I just told you about So he was sparring with Chad Dawson to help Chad Dawson get ready for our fight. Big fight. Chad Dawson was the lineal light heavyweight champion and had just beat the great legendary Bernard Hopkins. Southpaw. The fight before, yes.

58:20Dean Graziosi:Tall, rangy. He beat Bernard Hopkins. He's on HBO. Max Kellerman asked him, you know, Chad, what do you want next? I'm minding my own business. He calls my name. I had just won the Super 6. He said, I want Andre Ward. He said, I'll fight him in his hometown. of Oakland, California, and I go down to his weight too. I said, really? And I like Chad, like I supported Chad and didn't see that coming. That was like the easiest fight that we ever negotiated right there. And I held him to every single word that he spoke.

58:51Jason Wilson:Every word. He come to my weight, my place. So they get into training camp

58:57Dean Graziosi:and because he's losing so much weight, his punch resistance isn't there. Edison Miranda can crack. Edison Miranda knocks him out in sparring. He didn't sparring. Stuff starts to circulate. Virg comes to him, he said, listen, babe. He said, call me babe. Listen, babe, I'm not saying this to get you off track. We gotta stay focused. We were probably about two and a half, maybe three weeks away from the fight, maybe about two and a half. He said, I'm hearing some things, man. I'm hearing that Edison Miranda, he knocked Chad out. I said, knocked him out. He said, knocked him out. Like they had to stop the sparring, help him up, and that was it for the day.

59:32Dean Graziosi:now if you're a fighter like that's like the worst case scenario it's one thing if you get knocked out in a fight you got small gloves on no head gear it happens that's acceptable yeah in some respects in sparring nah nah not if you're the top dude there may be a sparring partner getting knocked out but not the top guy not the champion that was a no-no we started hearing rumors some kind of process like man he got knocked down man that's crazy but in my mind I'm always very much in my head, especially in training camps. I'm like, ah, maybe they're just floating that out there to get in my head or trying to get me off track.

1:00:06Dean Graziosi:And that's what Verge said. But don't worry about it too much. Just, you know, stay focused. We kept hearing stuff, kept hearing stuff. Nothing ever went on the airwaves. Nothing, nothing on the Internet, nothing. Press conference came the week of the fight. I'm thinking, man, I wonder if they're going to say something. A rumor is going to come out if I'm going to be asked about it. It's never asked about it. the weigh-in comes. Friday, the fight's Saturday. I said, now I'm going to drop it on him. Now I'm going to drop it on him. We go face-to-face, and his team, they're over there woofing. My team's kind of woofing a little bit.

1:00:42Dean Graziosi:And I leaned in his ear, and I said, hey, man, I heard what happened in that gym. I said, you better tighten it up tomorrow night. And you just see his shoulders just go. And he's got this look on his face like, how did you know? I won the fight with Chad Dawson right there. Oh my gosh, that's awesome. We turn and look at the cameras, turn back and look at them before I walk off the stage. I broke them. You just knew. Broke them. That is an awesome story. Because he thought he got away with it. He thought we didn't know it. It's too late. You can't get out of the fight now.

1:01:15Jason Wilson:That is awesome, man.

1:01:17Dean Graziosi:That was the only time I ever felt like I want to fight when I get a face off.

1:01:22Jason Wilson:Thank you for all of that insight of that and what it's like getting wrapped. I don't know if I've ever told that story before. It's awesome. We're keeping it in whether you want to or not. I'm keeping that one in there. No, we do too much. That was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed Milet Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest. Welcome back to Max Out, everybody. I'm so honored and blessed to have this man to my left here today. He just came on my radar very recently.

1:01:49Ed Mylett:And God is so good because I immediately fell in love with this man and his message through social media, through YouTube. And within about a week of me discovering who he was, unbelievably, his name came across my desk with an opportunity to have a conversation with him today. And I think he's one of the most unique and influential people that I've ever heard from as a man. And it's really an honor to have you here today. He's an author, he's a speaker, he's a coach. But what he does is he really impacts people's lives, particularly men, but you women today that are listening to this or watching this, you get to listen in on a conversation.

1:02:22Ed Mylett:I think it'll help you understand your man, your son, your potential boyfriend or your husband even better today. So Jason Wilson, thank you for being here.

1:02:31Andre Ward:It's a pleasure. Thanks. I appreciate it. It's my honor.

1:02:34Ed Mylett:You're so soft spoken and gentle. You're such a big, strong man. Is this new? Is this a different you? In other words, even the way that you speak, there's a cadence. You've got to be aware of this. I have no idea. There's a cadence. There's an ease. There's a pace to it. I'm curious if, or maybe you don't even know, if I met you 20 years ago, was there, did that exist? Was this always your disposition, so to speak, or has your disposition changed as you've been willing to share with yourself all of the emotions that a man should be experiencing?

1:03:09Andre Ward:I've changed. I have to ask. I would like to ask her. Let's ask her. What do you think?

1:03:14Ed Mylett:He's changed. Even his daughter's here. She's off camera, guys, but I was curious. Even his disposition, because I've noticed that with myself. i've listened to audios of me 20 years ago i still have a deep voice i'm still aggressive i still talk quickly but there was an edge and an aggression to even the way i spoke that is somewhat different now and alexis you see that

1:03:36Ed Mylett:yes he has this whisper

1:03:40Andre Ward:okay but that wasn't there it wasn't to your point it has developed as he's developed i got it okay even slow down.

1:03:50Ed Mylett:So those of you that can't hear Alexis, she's saying that he slows down, even the way that he speaks is much different as he's changed. And I think that's an external manifestation of something that's happened internally within you. It's very noticeable with you. It's one of the things I noticed right away with you was that there's this strong man, visually very strong man who is frankly strong enough to communicate in a very gentle and kind way that's pleasant to be with it's not it's not off-putting to be with and i just think all of you should know that over time i think jason's an example of just subtle changes you may not even know but your daughter knows sitting here change within you i had no idea you said cadence i'm like you're talking about riding a bike yeah it's the way that you you're well it's welcoming it allows someone to sit with you and um be present themselves and i think when when people become more vulnerable in the way they express themselves it almost gives you permission in their presence to be that way so the and the reason i say this is just dawning on me is that i have a son who's a kind young man he's a gentle pretty strong much bigger than me much stronger but i'd like to think that maybe a little bit of that is because the i he was fortunate enough that the former me isn't the one that raised him that for the most part it was a guy who had done some of this work that raised him and i just think it gives people permission to be in your presence i want to share something with you and then ask you about it because I see this all over you.

1:05:17Ed Mylett:We have a more in common than you might think in that when I left, I played baseball when I was done playing college. I was unemployed, just living at my parents' house. My dad gets sober. He goes to his first AA meeting. My dad gets sober. Comes back from the first meeting and says, I got you a job. Turns out it was an orphanage. It was a boy's home, a big one though. My boys were all removed from their homes or their parents were incarcerated or dead. But what I discovered by working with these boys, I was their big brother. I took them to school. I was there when they opened presents on Christmas day, you know, took them trick or treating.

1:05:48Ed Mylett:I was there when they got in a fight at school or broke up with their girlfriend or whatever it was. People always ask me, what do these boys want from you? And what I found from them was they wanted me to love them. They wanted someone to love them, care about them, believe in them, and maybe just show them how to live a little bit better. And as I got older and I got into business, people say, well, why'd you have some success in business because that's what everybody wants. All people want you to love them. They want you to care about them. They want you to believe in them. They want you to show them how to do a little better or help them.

1:06:18Ed Mylett:And I find that that's your overall, if I distilled down your message, the reason I agree with it and love it so much is it appears to me that that's what you do.

1:06:29Andre Ward:You know, I'm glad you said that because when I first started the Cave of Adelman for boys, it was just martial arts and discipline because although I rather I was still men to reset to the lamb no one wants to be in fight-or-flight response the whole time where you gotta be tough and mean mugging the whole time can I go there absolutely but if I could stay majority of time here this is where I want to be when I start working with the boys and I was different I was a different guy then I was all about structure discipline toughness fortitude and I still am yes However, I want you to be comprehensive.

1:07:03Andre Ward:Boot camp programs were very popular and scared straight programs were popular where you would take kids into school, into prisons. Yeah. And to get them scared enough to say, hey, I don't want to act up ever again. I discovered quickly, man, that re-traumatizing someone never heals the trauma experience. Boot camp programs started failing at alarming rates and I started shifting. I went from just a discipline program to a place where it's a safe space. And then I discovered that our boys didn't need more discipline. They needed more love. As soon as I gave them that, you know, our first program was in Highland Park, Michigan.

1:07:43Andre Ward:If I was late, these boys, I'm talking about tough kids. They would sweep and clean the room, everything, move the desk out. And they would sit there purposefully so that I could see them and say, wow, that's great. You guys didn't know. They just wanted the affirmation. They wanted to love. That's why they act out. And that's what I give them. I give them what I longed for. I'm literally, I became what I wanted. And that's what it is. It's no secret. I became a man who's strong, but sensitive, who's compassionate, but caring. Someone who can encourage you when you need to push through some pain, but also encourage you to express sorrow.

1:08:23Andre Ward:we need to apologize to someone or feel the grief so that you can do something to transform someone's life. If you're only stuck in just masculine attributes, you can see something wrong, but you say, no, I'm feeling something different. I won't be a man. So they shy away from that. So true. When we change as men, I say this and I didn't say you didn't say this. this world will change. You're right. When we can change, like really become comprehensive, misogynistic behavior, I can go down the line, will change. And that's inside working from the inside out.

1:09:03Jason Wilson:Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Welcome back to Max Out, everybody. I'm fired up about today's topic because we're gonna talk about one of the things that I think is the most important things as it relates to winning. And it's one of the things that you can decide you're going to do without any natural giftedness because it's the number one talent you must develop in order to win. And it's not talked about on social media. You're not gonna get it in a personal development tape and a peak performance program, self-help, and any of it.

1:09:37Jason Wilson:Remember this, the best ability is availability. Did you hear that? The best ability is availability, that you are available to win. Not enough people understand that this is an actual skill and talent. Most people in business or in life, whether it be relationships or the financial part of their life, they're always looking for these little tips and skills that you should develop. How to communicate better, how to be a better listener, how to suppress your ego, how to influence people, how to transfer energy, all these things that I teach, how to deal with failure. But I believe the greatest talent that you can draw a line through all the people who have won, not all the people that went in business or life, are unbelievable transfers of energy.

1:10:16Jason Wilson:Not all of them can close. Not all of them can persuade. Not all of them are great listeners. Not all of them even dealt well with adversity. They did that the majority of the time. But all of them have in common, they develop the talent, and yes, it is a talent. It is a skill of not quitting. I don't think most of you right now that are struggling in your business life right now are giving yourself enough credit for this incredible talent you're developing, which is resiliency, which is the ability not to quit. Listen to what I'm telling you. somebody has built multiple different companies. I've coached some of the top athletes, entertainers, business people, and politicians in the world.

1:10:49Jason Wilson:And I'm telling you that even in my own team, when I hire people, I look for resiliency. And a notch above that is the talent, is the skill of not quitting as the number one thing that I look for. And many of you right now listening to this possess the number one skill necessary to win and don't give yourself any credit for it, which means it's not helping build your confidence. It's not going to the bank of crediting for your identity. And so although you possess this incredible ability that so many people in the world don't have and don't possess, you have it and you don't value it. You don't prize it.

1:11:23Jason Wilson:You don't give yourself credit for having it. It ought to be where you draw the majority of your confidence from. The ability to say, I don't quit. I'm resilient. I own the number one skill, the number one talent required to eventually win. I already have. I can't quit. it, you'd have to kill me to get me out of chasing my dream, right? So number one, I want to point it out as the number one gift. The best ability is availability. Do you have it? Have you decided to have it? Is it something you're going to possess the rest of your life? And those of you that do have it already, I need you to take an inventory, be aware of it, and be intentional with crediting yourself as you're listening to this or watching it today into the bank of your self-confidence, into the bank, into the deposits you make in your identity, because it has everything to do with winning.

1:12:09Jason Wilson:Every guest you've seen on my show, all the people that I've coached all have different talents, skills, and abilities. What's the one they all have? The ability to stay present, the ability to stay in the fight, to have not quit. You think, well, that's not a big deal. Really? Because as I've been talking, millions of people made the decision to quit on their dream, just as I've been talking to you. The rest of the day, millions more will. Tomorrow, millions more. Every day, literally, millions of people quit on one of their dreams, their dream relationship. their dream business, their dream body.

1:12:41Jason Wilson:So quitting has become the number one habit in the world by people that end up losing. And I'm telling you, it happens every day, every second, everywhere. Just the fact that while I've been speaking, you're still after your dream. You're ahead of them. You don't give yourself enough credit because eventually what I found, it looks like winning is this huge competition. But every day, every week, every year, every decade, as time goes by,

1:13:03Ed Mylett:you're going to find that you're competing with a smaller and smaller and smaller group of people. for your dream because so many of them will just quit. And by the way, many of them that quit will possess talents,

1:13:15Jason Wilson:maybe even gifts you don't have. Their incredible ability with people, their incredible strength, their incredible brain, and they'll quit with all this giftedness, but you got the talent. You have to learn to distinguish between something that is a talent and a gift. You can develop skills, you can develop talents. Gifts are something you're born with, but the people that I see that win long-term are the ones who develop the talents and skills required to win. Business and life's a lot like a pinata. You know, I was at a barbecue, a birthday party for a five-year-old a while back, and they did a pinata.

1:13:46Jason Wilson:Have you seen the pinata before? And it's an unbelievable metaphor for life. In fact, we had a call today. Life is like a pinata, because it really is. If you look at these kids at these parties, any of you that have ever been to a pinata, you can picture it. They got the pinata up there, and what do they do? It's just like in business and life when you start something new, a new relationship, a new body, a new pursuit, a new business, right? What do they do? They take this little five-year-old and they blindfold him. They blindfold this little guy, right? And he can't see. He doesn't know where he's going.

1:14:14Jason Wilson:And then they spin him around. He gets completely disoriented, right? And then they hand him a bat. It's scary when you watch it, don't you? Picture these little kids, right? You blindfold them. They spin him around. They become disoriented. Does that sound familiar to any of you that are trying to build a business right now? You're completely disoriented. You're blind. You don't know where to go. They spin this little guy around. They hand him a bat and they go, hit the pinata. and the pinata is over to the right and they're swinging to the left. They're just whiffing, right? They're not even in the right direction.

1:14:40Jason Wilson:And then finally, what do you do? You grab the little guy or the little girl and you turn them and you have them face the pinata. They were completely disoriented. In fact, they were doing more damage to the people around them in the beginning with that darn bat you gave them because they're so disoriented. A lot of damage was done before they even faced the actual pinata. They've been blindfolded and spun around, right? They're completely disoriented. Doesn't that sound familiar? It's just like building your new business. It's just like trying to transform your body. It might be just like this brand new relationship you've got.

1:15:10Jason Wilson:And in fact, the people around them are in danger in the beginning when you give these little guys this bat. Maybe that sounds familiar. Maybe right now you're at this stage in your business or you've been there before where there's been more damage done than there's been progress. You know what I'm talking about? The people around you have been more hurt by your new venture than benefited from it. Your relationship with them is not as good. Maybe financially you've hurt them or feel like you have. There's been a lot of damage. But what do we do with these little guys? We eventually take the little girl or the little boy and we point them in the right direction at the pinata.

1:15:40Jason Wilson:That's when you find Ed Milet's podcast. You find his teachings. You find his YouTube channel or someone like me and I can point you in the right direction. And then what do these guys do? They take the bat and they're hitting the pinata as hard as they can and they're hitting it and they're hitting it and they're hitting it and no candy comes out. And they get tired, don't they? And they just, they can't go anymore. So what do you do? You get help and you add a teammate you add a friend you take the blindfold off of you and you get a little help That help could be a new recruit in your business a new employee a new vendor It might be a new mentor and we put the blindfold on them We spin them around and then they're disoriented.

1:16:15Jason Wilson:They're swinging it. They're not even hitting the pinata yet They're they're hurting the people around them. Then what do we take them? We point them in the right direction Now they're following my show or great teachings and they hit the pinata as hard as they can No candy comes out. You take another child, new teammate, new recruit in life, right? But in the pinata, there's another child. You put a blindfold, spin them around, and they hit the pinata. And they're hitting it as hard as they can. And it feels like no progress is being made. No candy's coming out, right? And eventually, they're hitting it and hitting it, and they get tired.

1:16:45Jason Wilson:And you think, man, how often do they have to hit this pinata? And what happens is sometimes the first few kids who hit the pinata, they kind of disappear from the party and start playing somewhere else. Maybe you've had that experience in your business. And some of the people you start with, they may not finish before the candy comes out. They may not be there. May not be there to celebrate. Some of the initial people disappear. And that could cause you to want to quit. But eventually what happens with that pinata? Even though these kids are hitting the pinata and they're teaming up, they're all working together to try to make this candy come out.

1:17:14Jason Wilson:It doesn't look like it, but each shot on that pinata is putting them closer to the candy. Even though it doesn't seem like it. Even though you can't see the candy, every blow is like a compound pounding effect. That pounding compounded by multiple people eventually can create a breakthrough. But what most people do is they leave the party before the candy comes out. That's true in business. Most people quit before the candy comes out. They don't stick around long enough. They got spun around. They get disoriented. They might hurt the people around. They get pointed in the right direction. They think they're making progress.

1:17:49Jason Wilson:Then they don't. They think they're making progress, then they don't. And eventually, because no candy's coming out, no money, no changed body, no amazing relationship, they stop swinging the bat at the pinata. But if you stick around for the party long enough, you know what always happens with a pinata? Eventually, someone hits it, and bam, the candy comes out everywhere, and everyone celebrates and gets all the candy and dives on it and celebrates. Here's what I'm here to remind you of today. You've got to stick around long enough for the candy to come out. You got to wait for the candy to come out of that pinata called your life, called your business, called your body, called your relationships.

1:18:25Jason Wilson:The vast majority of people in life don't stick around for the candy because they think as they're hitting the pinata of their life, they don't think they're making progress. It doesn't feel like progress. But I'm telling you, the number one ability is availability. And if you keep swinging away every day, even though it doesn't feel like it, you are getting closer to the candy. You're getting closer. It just doesn't feel like it. You know what I had? I had the ability to keep hitting the pinata in my life to stick around long enough. And by the way, when you eventually win, it's not just you that gets all the candy, that gets all the victory, that gets all the money.

1:19:02Jason Wilson:Lots of people around you, many of which who you were hurting originally with that bat, many of them who were trying to talk you out of it, they get to celebrate in the candy too. My prayer for you is that you begin to think about this analogy, the pinata of your life, the pinata of your business, the pinata of your body, as you're swinging away, I'm here to tell you, even though it doesn't feel like it, you're getting closer to the candy. And if you can add more people to celebrate, it's okay that you feel disoriented. It's okay that it feels blinding and you don't know exactly what direction to go, just like these precious babies with the pinata.

1:19:38Jason Wilson:It's okay that you miss it once in a while. It's okay that you get tired once in a while. But as long as you keep after it and you keep pounding away, that compound effort of your pounding, I can promise you there's candy someday. And everybody around you will jump on it and celebrate. That's my wish for you. Today, as you listen to me, of all the skills I'm going to teach you, that I've taught you, and if you've not listened to my other shows, I teach about listening, transfer energy, how to close, how to change your identity, how to live blissfully dissatisfied, how to unlock your success code, all of the very detailed things I teach today is the most important thing is that as you learn all these skills, it'll help you with the blindness.

1:20:18Jason Wilson:Every single skill you learn, you'll see clearer and clearer and clearer. But if you don't develop the talent, the number one skill in the world, which is to keep hitting the pinata and to stick around until the candy comes out, because here's the deal. Someone's going to get the candy in life. There's always candy in life. That pinata eventually always breaks down. Do you want to be the person who was there in the beginning hitting as hard as you could and sacrificing and maybe hurting the people around you and never get the candy?

1:20:46Ed Mylett:Or are you going to get something for your pain? Are you going to get something for your effort? Are you going to get something for this sacrifice you're making?

1:20:53Jason Wilson:You've got to get something for this pain. You've got to stick in the game until the candy comes out and then we all get to celebrate. That's what I want you focused on today. I promise you there's a pinata in your life and right now many of you feel blind and disoriented, maybe even hurting the people around you. Some of you are past that phase and you're hitting your thing hard every day, but there's no candy yet. I promise you there's going to be a payoff for you. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify.

1:21:21Jason Wilson:Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Welcome back to Max Out, everybody. Today's awesome. I just reached out to this man. I said, hey, brother, I think the world needs a little bit more Dean and Ed. and everywhere I go, people bring up the time that we've spent together on our other show as one of their favorite, if not their favorite show that I've ever done. And this man here is a friend of mine, but beyond that, I just want you to know,

1:21:45Ed Mylett:he's incredibly financially successful person. We were just talking about some of the great things happening in his life off camera. I think he's one of the most articulate and brilliant people in all of the entrepreneur life strategy, personal development space. and he approaches it in a way that's different than everybody else. There's a kindness that exudes out of this man, a gentleness yet strength that no one else has. He's also somebody that many of the other people in the space go to for personal advice and for counsel. He's just a good man. He's a great husband. He's a wonderful father.

1:22:19Ed Mylett:And I count him as a friend and somebody that I admire greatly. So Dean Graziosi, thank you for being here today, brother.

1:22:26Fallon Taylor:Thank you for that beautiful introduction. I feel the same way about you, Ed. We met each other a little bit before the podcast, and it was like we were bonded brothers forever after that. And it was a great show, and I still get hit up on a regular basis. I know you do. There was something magical about that show because we get hit up all the time about it. So it's good to be here with you.

1:22:41Ed Mylett:One thing that a lot of people are listening to this, and they know they've got that thing. They're not working out like they should. Maybe they are in that text thing. Maybe it's that they don't eat the way they should. They don't make the context they should. They're not up as early. They've got a thing. but they're winning in spite of it, right?

1:22:56Jason Wilson:In spite of it, they've got some winning going on because in spite of the fact for many years, Dean, that you weren't as congruent as you wanted to be, you were still producing financial success. Massively. Massively.

1:23:08Ed Mylett:But what's happened the last four or five years is your life has become a freaking rocket ship in terms of influence. You guys, Dean's been famous a long time. You go back to all the infomercial days. If you've not seen Dean or you hear this voice, It's because Dean was all over television forever. Very successful in that space and the influence space, the real estate space, as he was not congruent in every area of his life. But man, the last four or five years. So speak to that. If you can solve that thing you got, it's like a football team who's got no running game. Man, if they could just run the football, they've already got a good passing game.

1:23:42Ed Mylett:Their defense is good. They're a playoff team already. But if they could run the football, they're going to win the Super Bowl. There's always that thing, right? True or false? Yes.

1:23:50Fallon Taylor:So, okay. And I love this question, man. I love hanging out with you, man. And thank you for everybody listening. I know you have lots of options. So thanks for hanging out with two friends talking about stuff where I had no idea what we were talking about. So this is really cool. Um, here's what I know what happens sometimes I'll tell you what I did for a decade. If we're going to talk about relationships, I'll be completely transparent. I thought about leaving my relationship every day of my life for five years. It was almost the first thing I thought about every day, not because she's a bad human in any way.

1:24:21Fallon Taylor:There were just, it just wasn't the right fit. I'm not an advocate of divorce, but it just didn't fit. But here's what I did for years. I was financially successful. At the time I thought I was the best dad possible, even though I wasn't showing them the best example, but I thought I'm an engaged father. I coach little league coach softball. I'm there. I bring them to school, make them lunches, love them to death. I'm a great leader to my team. I'm a good friend to people who need me. So my relationships are and I'm not congruent, I should be freaking fortunate. So who gets it all? This is what I remember, oh you want it all Dean.

1:24:55Fallon Taylor:You want love and congruency and a good dad and financially free. And I remember just thinking, stop being greedy. If your relationship doesn't work. But really what I was doing is I wasn't facing something because it was scary to me. It was scary leaving my kids. I'm not thinking, thinking and not being with my kids every single day was like a shot in the gut. and I just ignored it and avoided it and it grew. It grew to where I didn't become the man that I was supposed to be. Listen, whatever you believe in, God, the universe, I believe in God and I believe God has created you to be bigger, better and stronger than you currently are.

1:25:32Fallon Taylor:No matter where you are in your life, God wants you to be the woman you were meant to be, the man you were meant to be. And if you believe in karma, whatever your beliefs are, you are meant to be more. And when you let one of those areas build, it doesn't go away. I don't care how much I try to push it down on the inside it just kept growing and you feel that you like You're looking away from it even though it's there and I want you to think about this When you have to some things are difficult You might have to face a change of a business a change of a business partner change of a job change in a relationship the thing that you've been avoiding is Growing even though you think it's not and it's like got roots and the roots are creeping over into all areas of your life and you don't know and you're working harder stronger faster to overcome this and you think you're conquering it if you're in a relationship that's not good and maybe you go to the strip club or you text on your phone or you do something and you think you're fulfilling it you're not you're just letting the roots grow in deeper and stronger and you're working twice as hard to be successful and you don't even realize it and here's the way I looked at it when I decided or we decided to get a divorce and you can use this analogy you could tell I got some silly analogies you can use this in any area of your life.

1:26:45Fallon Taylor:Picture your ship is in a bay. It's calm. The water's calm. There's other great ships in the bay. The weather's kind of beautiful. It's kind of nice, but you know you're not meant to be in that bay. But man, it just has all the signs where you're supposed to be there. But the only way out of that bay is you got to sail your ship through the storm that's out in the ocean. You're watching the storm and you're watching how turbulent it is. You're in the bay and it's comfortable, but the only way to your next level, the only way to break through, the only way to get rid of those roots, to kind of crush that thing that you're avoiding or afraid of, is you got to sail your ship through the storm.

1:27:23Fallon Taylor:You see the storm, it's turbulent, the waves are high, the sky is dark, and you're not even sure because you've never navigated that territory. You don't have a map because you've never been there. You've never experienced it. And the way I looked at it when I was going through a divorce is I was so scared of for my kids, not me being alone, but scared on how that would work out with my kids, that a lot of times I put my ship in the storm, it got bumpy, and I went back to the bay. And I'll tell you, when I finally said, I can't be the man I'm supposed to be staying in this harbor, even though it's pretty, and there's great people around, and it's going through that storm, going through the changes, the navigating of new territory.

1:28:02Fallon Taylor:You're mapping out new territory on the fly, and your ship's going down, and you want to turned back a hundred times. But there's this moment and it happened to me when I went through a divorce. There was this moment where I didn't know if I could take it. And I was scared for my kids and I was having anxiety attacks. But I want to share with you, there was this moment that my ship landed on the other side of the storm and it was over. And I was a different human. I was a different man. I looked through a different lens. I had a new map and I realized I wasn't meant for that other bay. Yes, it was safe.

1:28:34Fallon Taylor:Yes, it was okay. But listen, at the end of our lives, do we want to be okay, right? And when I got to the other side, it was this fresh start. I found a way to be friends with my ex. I found a way for my kids to be safe. I found a way to replace quantity with quality with my children. I found a way to be a better version of me and attract Lisa in my life. And when those roots were gone, this is what I want to share with all of you for that one area of your life that you know what I'm talking about as you're hearing this you're picturing it and you're going wow nobody really knows that I do that when no one's watching nobody knows that I'd like to fix that no one knows that I kind of BS everybody else and say I'm working on it but I'm not I want to tell you when they go away your sailboat turns into a ship with five engines on it like my life exponentially grew I became a better dad a better leader a better friend I had more compassion had more empathy.

1:29:27Fallon Taylor:I replaced anger with compassion and things just, I just became a different person. I mean, I think I was a good man 10 years ago, but I wouldn't recognize him. I'm not the same human today. And that allowed me to go faster. And I just encourage you, you've heard this before, but your next level lives on the thing, on the other side of the thing you're avoiding, the other thing you're afraid of. And Ed, I think I heard you say this, you know, all of us, we get to learn from each other and listen to each other. And I'll go listen to a podcast when I need a little, I'll listen to a little Ed Milet or watch it.

1:29:59Fallon Taylor:But I remember somebody saying it, it may have been you, but what drives me to fix those pieces, guys? And I want you to hear this, the business that you want to scale, start the relationship you want to fix or end the parenting style that you've gone so long doing it one way. You think it's too late and you You gotta fight for it. It's worth the fight. Whatever it is, the fight. I just wanna tell you, I picture, I've always pictured being at the end of my life and having a conversation with God. And he said, how did it go? Right? Always picture that. And I always have the fear of going, well, you know, I was in a good relationship.

1:30:33Fallon Taylor:Right? Or things were okay. You know, I was great at my business, great at impacting lives, and I did this, and I was a good dad. What about your relationship? Eh, it was okay. Like, I picture saying that to someone where we have this creation given to us, this opportunity. And I feel like this inner disappointment where I'd want to scream and go, you know what? Damn it. Can I do that over? And you don't get that chance. You don't get that chance. Like you don't get a do over and you'd want to. So I put those emotions of my future back on me. Things you've again, already heard. And I think I heard this from you, Ed, or someone, but I heard someone put that on a whole nother level.

1:31:07Fallon Taylor:Could you imagine if God pulled out his iPhone and said, Ed, I appreciate all you've done and you've served and you give, and that one area of life. Can I play you a quick video of the man you could have been?

1:31:20Ed Mylett:That's my stuff.

1:31:21Fallon Taylor:That is yours. I knew I heard that from you. When I heard that from you, Ed, it honestly took what I had been, I had been telling myself my last conversation with God. And when I heard that from you, I've shared that and I feel that all the time. And if I didn't, I want to share this with you guys. And I hope it's relating to where you are in your life right now. If you're looking for what's going to drive you, what's going to take you to the next level? How do you move your lighthouse out? How do you wake up compelled again, not just want to chill? And how do you find that, that, that, that thrive, that, that energy, that zest for life again?

1:31:51Fallon Taylor:I just want to share with you that if I didn't sail my ship out of that Harbor, that safe Harbor and go through, I'm not, I'm, I'm understating what I went through. I don't take aspirin. When I was going through a divorce, worrying about my kids, I was popping Xanax three days a week. Cause I couldn't control my anxiety. I was drinking a glass of wine five nights a week. Cause I couldn't put myself to sleep. So I'm, I'm understating how bad I was for a short period of time. When I was in the middle of that storm, I thought of turning back because I felt so crappy about myself and worried about my kids so much.

1:32:22Fallon Taylor:But I want to tell you on the other side, I never would have experienced what real love could be like. I have love in a way that I wish it for every single one of you. There's nothing I can even share that compares to having a true soulmate that's got your back, that supports you and loves you. And you feel the same where you don't keep score and you got each other's back. I never would have experienced that if I didn't go through the storm. And whatever that storm is for you, you have to have that compelling future and you have to stay steadfast and realize if you go back to where you were, you'll get more of what you used to have.

1:32:56Jason Wilson:That was a great conversation. Be sure to follow the Ed Milet show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. All right. Welcome back to the show, everybody. So So the man that we're going to talk with today is a very important man to me. There are not five people on planet Earth that I would rather speak to today than this young man. And my dream list for people that would be on this podcast, he is at the very, very top of the list. Because he's a story of resiliency, faith, strength, comeback. And you all know his story. On January 2nd, 2023, with about five minutes and 58 seconds left in the game against the Cincinnati Bengals, my dear friend here tackled wide receiver T.

1:33:45Jason Wilson:Higgins, who was running with the ball. He hit DeMar in the chest with his helmet, and DeMar made the tackle, as he always does. He got up after that tackle, stood up for a second, and then collapsed on the field. and in that moment our country was captivated and literally hundreds of millions of people were in prayer for this precious young man. I don't know that I've ever said this and meant it more. I am so grateful that you are here today and welcome to the show, Damar Hamlin. Good to have you here, brother.

1:34:20Andre Ward:Thanks for having me. I appreciate the intro. You've talked to some of the biggest and the best across the world, So to be in that top five that you wanted to talk to, it's an honor. I'm glad to be here.

1:34:34Jason Wilson:Glad to believe. You know what I'm curious about is, do you have any imposter syndrome about all this? As my platform grew, more and more people started listening to me. I was like, man, if they knew how much of this stuff I'm still working on trying to figure out. Everyone's looking at me for advice, and I'm still trying to figure out this or that or the other thing. And it took me a while to accept that God will use my imperfections and the things I don't know. And the fact that I'm more like most people than not to connect me with them, that I don't have to be, I don't have to have every answer.

1:35:09Jason Wilson:I don't have to know everything. It finally, you know, dawned on me that it's okay, but all that I'm not perfect. You know, they don't have it all figured out. Is there any part of you that's like, God, why me? Like, I mean, I'm still, I'm in my mid twenties. I'm trying to figure all this stuff out myself. Is there any part of you that feels that way, or do you just accept the anointing and the calling and you go with it?

1:35:30Andre Ward:You know, maybe two times over this last year and two months have I ever decided to, like, you know, let myself have a feeling of why me. You know, it's natural. You know, it's supernatural. And a lot of it came with football because I truly loved the game of football. You know, football was truly my peace away from the world. You know, I would go to practice. I would have so much going on in my personal life in college, like arguing with girlfriends and dealing with class. And I'm probably arguing with my parents about something, just being a young college kid. Like my whole entire life is chaos.

1:36:10Andre Ward:But I come to practice for these two and a half hours and I am at peace. I feel like I'm sitting at the beach listening to the waves, you know, while I'm at practice. because I truly love the process of getting better, you know, but to have that snatched away from you, you know, and then have the space where you truly had your peace and now you're facing your fears in that space and having to overcome that whole feeling. You know, it was it was it was something that, you know, I really had to work for, you know. But, you know, I only ask myself why me maybe two times in the whole time. And then I will always just correct myself.

1:36:49Andre Ward:And, you know, I understand why, you know, I truly know that God seen me as somebody who was, you know, doing his work. You know, I was out here and I don't I don't mean to say that like I'm the most spiritual person in the world or, you know, like I don't remember the last time I showed up for church on a Sunday. You know what I mean? Just my personal life is busy. I have a lovely church that I do go to back at home in McKees Rock, Pennsylvania. but you know i don't remember the last time that i showed up to church on sunday so i don't want to even seem like i'm this perfect person or i was this perfect person you know that god just selected me because i was above all else now like you said i'm more like everybody than i'm not but you know i was truly doing right by people um i clapped for others while i waited my turn I learned from the people before me I supported everyone and I truly let my heart walk into every room before I did with no expectations in return you know with no expectations in return that's just because of how I was raised you know and I was truly a kid that you know I I found God within my own personal life you know what I mean I grew up a Christian kid and I went to a Catholic high school you know and it was like it was like you know within that journey I had to figure out what this relationship meant to me um through that process you know I truly developed my own relationship and I formatted all of the goals that I want to accomplish my life off of that relationship and uh you know I never asked my I tried to never ask myself or let myself you know get the perspective of why me because I know why me because I was doing the work and I was I was moving right by people and you know uh Who better than me?

1:38:37Andre Ward:And I don't want to take credit away from no one else, but I don't know if anyone would have been able to handle the situation like this. So just thinking about that.

1:38:51Jason Wilson:Yeah. By the way, you're right. I did the other thing. When you look at God's work in hindsight, it always usually kind of lines up once you look at it. The other thing that's really obvious to me tomorrow, I'll just tell you, is that God chose somebody who could be a great communicator of this message. He chose a guy who's really good with words. And not only are you good with words, but when you say things, there's an energy transfer, there's an impact, there's an emotion when you say things. That's rare. When someone's gifted with the athleticism you've been gifted with and clearly the IQ you've been gifted with, to also have the ability to communicate on the fly like you do is a very rare thing.

1:39:29Jason Wilson:and it's clear that I really believe that you were chosen for this. I just really do. I have to tell you, as a parent, I watched a conversation your mom had. Your mom was at the game and was trying to get to you, as I understand it. Is that correct? Yeah, she was it.

1:39:44Andre Ward:My mom and my dad. Yeah.

1:39:47Jason Wilson:I'm just wondering, I asked you how it's affected you or changed you. What about how it's affected the people around you and their lives or even the way they interact with you. I'm wondering, I mean, obviously the attention you got is crazy. Every athlete and famous person in the world is talking about you all the time. But you know this, when you're a college player, it's one thing. You get to the NFL, the world changes around you a little bit, right? Like just the way the world responds to you is different. When you're not well-known and then you're famous. When you're poor compared to when you're rich.

1:40:20Jason Wilson:So I have to imagine when you're alive and then you're not for a few minutes and then you're alive again, that the way the world treats you might change a little bit. Has it changed a little bit the way the world reacts to you?

1:40:33Andre Ward:Yeah, definitely, man. You know, the first way is people are touched. Like, people are truly touched. And, like, some people, like, people see me, they just want to hug. Like, people see me, they want to, you know, tell me a little bit about their story or, you know, somebody that they know or how they were affected or some things that they're going through personally. You know, so people are touched in all kinds of different ways. And, you know, even outside of the situation, people see my mission. You know, people see the mission that I've been on even greater now. You know, and that's a part of, you know, the blessings, because, you know, within my immediate family, nothing has changed.

1:41:16Andre Ward:Like my mom, my dad, me, my brother, we're all still the same people. You know, like this hasn't my mom and dad, once I decided to play football again, they're like, OK, this is what we're doing. And this is what you decided to do. And we're 110 percent behind you. You know, like whichever way it was, you know, there was going to be 110 percent behind me. You know, so my parents haven't changed a bit. They're on my back, just like I was in college. They're not, you know, they're not cutting me any slack. They're not, you know, the expectations aren't different. If I still come home and, you know, I spend some time at my parents' house, I'm going to be taking out the trash, doing dishes.

1:41:57Andre Ward:I'm going to be vacuuming the living room floor, like, you know. So, you know, my immediate family, thank God that, you know, everything is still the same there. but you know it has caused a little bit of trouble you know within like friendships and things like that to where you know some people feel obligated to you know be around me more or you know it it's it's all over the place I try to not focus on it but you know when it's the personal people around you that you grew up with that you wanted to be spending the rest of your life with that you thought would be in your wedding you know it has a little bit of effect on you, you know, so, but, um, you know, the people that truly love me and love me with no expectation behind it are all still in my life.

1:42:40Andre Ward:They're all still the same people with me and we're enjoying life. We all have a different perspective and a different appreciation for life.

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