BONUS Meditation: Listen for 21 Days to Reprogram Your Subconscious

0:00Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to a very special bonus episode of the Mel Robbins podcast.

0:11I'm so glad that you're here and I want to welcome you to this bonus episode of the Mel Robbins podcast. I'm so excited to be able to share this meditation with you. This meditation acts as a companion to an episode that we just released called Why Do I Love the Way That I Love? The Four Attachment Styles Explained. Now don't worry if you haven't listened to that episode yet, this meditation will still work for you. It was created by the best-selling author, Thais Gibson. Thais is an expert in attachment theory, and she's worked with over 30 ,000 people to help them identify their attachment style and heal what she calls their core wounds from childhood.

0:50This meditation is something that Thais created for you. And it's also a tool that she uses in her private practice with her clients. Now, if you listen to this meditation for 21 days in a row, Thais says it will help you rewire your subconscious mind so that you can heal from your childhood wounds and start creating healthier and more fulfilling and secure relationships as an adult as you move forward with your life. And just in case you've tuned into this bonus episode and you haven't heard the conversation with Thais Gibson, don't worry, I got you covered. I'll just give you the basic information about core wounds so that you can jump right into the meditation now.

1:33Core wounds happen during your childhood and they come from your unmet needs and how those unmet needs of yours created beliefs about yourself. And I'll give you an example of some of the most common core wounds. Feeling like I'm not good enough. Believing that when you love somebody, people leave you or abandon you. Thinking that you're defective. Now, if you're not sure what your core wound is, don't worry about it. You can just ask yourself, when I get triggered, what is it that I'm afraid is going to happen next? Or what is it that I believe about myself when I feel triggered? That's all you need to know to get the most out of this meditation.

2:12And one more thing, I shouldn't have to say this, but meditations are meant to be done when you're not doing anything else. So if you're driving a car or you're up on a ladder doing something, or you're busy running errands, maybe you want to bookmark this and come back to it at a moment when you can find a really comfy place to sit and really sink in to every single word that Thais Gibson is about to share with you. All right, you ready? I know I am. Let's listen to this meditation.

2:53So let's start together and let's pull up a major core wound. And you can start this process by just closing your eyes for a moment and pick the core wound that is troubling you the most. So it could be, I am not good enough. It could be, I am abandoned. It could be, I will be betrayed. I am defective. I am trapped. So pick that big core wound that keeps showing up for you and you know is wreaking havoc and you're ready to let it go. And then what you can do next here for a moment is just think about the opposite. Okay. So what is the opposite of that core wound? If you're trapped, you are free.

3:33If you are not good enough, you are good enough. If you're abandoned, you will stay connected. And what I want you to do here is we'll go through this together and look for different pieces of evidence, because remember that evidence or memory is leveraging that repetition, that emotion, that imagery. So we're going to use our conscious mind here to speak to the language of our subconscious mind. So now that you have that opposite to your core wound ready, and we'll use the example of not good enough to good enough, I want you to take a moment and think of a time that you felt the opposite of that core wound.

4:10And we can look at the different areas of life. We can start by looking just in our career area for a moment. Are there places that you felt the opposite of the core wound? that you felt, for example, good enough. And we can look at different characteristics that we have and the way that we show up, different traits that we express. We can look at different ways we've shown up with other people as a friend, as a mentor, as somebody who cares. And I want you just to take a moment and really sit and sort of bathe in that memory or that experience.

4:52Now, the more specific that you get, the more you feel about it, the more specific the imagery becomes for you, the easier of a job you'll have in reprogramming. So pick one big thing you can see in the career area. Now let's look for another one. Is there another time that you felt the opposite of that core wound that you felt connected or good enough or free? I want you to look for a second time in the career area of life that you felt that you showed up in a way that demonstrated those attributes. And if you can, try to really feel about it in your body. Try to notice the different sensations that appear, that feeling in your body of being free or of being connected, or that feeling of pride in your torso and face of being enough.

5:53Really try to sit in that for a moment.

6:00And now we'll move into another area of life. Let's look at your friendships. Where have you shown up or had experiences to oppose that core wound? Where have you shown up as a great friend? What traits or characteristics? Or where have you felt free or connected? try to think of a specific time or memory where you felt the opposite of that core wound try to really notice as you're imagining that memory you're remembering it in your mind's eye try to really notice in the friendship area what the people felt around you can you tell how much care or support was in that experience with other people.

6:54Try to really feel those emotions and sensations in your body. And remember, the more you tune in to the specifics, to the images, to the feelings, the deeper the reprogramming reaches your subconscious mind.

7:14now let's move into another area let's look at family let's look at a time in that specific area with family where you felt the opposite of your core wound what attributes did you showcase how did you show up as a human being or what characteristics do you just naturally have as a person when nobody's watching that are the opposite of the core wound, that make you good enough, that make you free, that make you connected. Try to anchor in that very specific memory, that very specific moment where you felt a lot of that emotion. And try to notice the images of everybody around you and how they showed up and how that made you feel.

8:10Just sit there for a moment, feeling that emotion in your body, letting it wash over you, really allowing it to anchor into your subconscious mind.

8:26And now we're going to move into another area. Let's look at the relationship area of life romantically. Let's look at the natural characteristics or attributes you have as a person. Again, who you are when no one is watching, who you truly are deep down in the way that you show up in romantic relationships. What beautiful characteristics do you have to offer that gently oppose that core wound, those unnecessary stories or lies you've been holding on to about yourself for far too long? try to really think of the opposite of that wound and how you are worthy of love or you are good enough or how relationships can also set you free or keep you connected try to really highlight that specific memory in your mind's eye to oppose that core wound

9:30and as you have that memory and as you sit in it for a moment I want you to get as specific as possible with all of the images what do you notice how does that person look at you in that memory how do you feel in that memory when they look at you do you notice any emotions or sensations in your body? Feelings of joy or pride or care? Try to really feel those. Now, as you're noticing those, I want you to really allow that to wash over you. Really, really soak it up all of those different experiences. We'll do one last experience here. I want you to look at the relationship to yourself. So look at the opposite of that core wound and I want you to try to really see yourself.

10:37Something that you personally deeply feel makes you the opposite of the core wound. Perhaps makes you worthy of connection or love, or perhaps is something that you know can set you free or make you feel proud, good enough. I want you to be honest with yourself and be willing to look at something within you that you're proud of, that you feel is the opposite of that core wound. And try to really hold that in your mind's eye, a time where you, a memory where you specifically expressed the opposite of that core wound. And when you have that, try to sit with that for a moment and try to really feel what you were feeling in that memory, that memory of when you saw that you were good enough or you saw that you were lovable or you saw that you could be free

11:46and as you sit with that memory notice the emotion in your body notice the feeling of lightness in your chest or expansion in your torso and allow that to really wash over you.

12:07And now I want you to remember how you feel. And this is the start of something you can begin doing and feeling every day that you have the power to do, to use your conscious mind, to communicate to your subconscious mind on a daily basis so that you can feel the opposite of these old core wounds, these old stories that you might be sick and tired of feeling and experiencing and want to set yourself free from. And what I want you to do is hold onto those feelings. And as you choose to open your eyes, remember that this is something you can return back to. This is something you can anchor learn more, find more pieces of evidence.

12:52And as you repeat this for the next 21 days, you will see, feel, and believe the opposite of all of these old things that you want to let go of once and for all.

13:18I just love listening to her voice, don't you? I'm ready to let go of all that stuff once and for all. And I'm sure you are too. And that's why I'm going to come back to this every single day for the next 21 days. And I hope you do too. Please also consider sharing this with people that you love because it really can help you heal. And if you haven't already listened, I know that you are truly going to love the episode that inspired this meditation. That episode is called Why Do I Love the Way That I Love? The Four Attachment Styles Explained. And in case no one else tells you today, I wanted to be sure to tell you that I love you and I believe in you and I believe in your ability to create a better life.

14:07Alrighty, I'll talk to you in a few days.

14:20Oh, and one more thing. This is the legal language. You know what the lawyers write and what I need to read to you. This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. I'm just your friend. I am not a licensed therapist. And this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional. Got it? Good. I'll see you in the next episode. Stitcher.