How to Create Your Dream Life

0:07Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so you never miss another podcast episode. I put out episodes four times a week to help you learn and grow and improve who you are. So if you're on this path of self-development, join us. Can't wait to help you improve. Today, I'm gonna talk to you about how to become the best version of yourself and how to become the type of person that can create the life that you want. If you're listening to this podcast, I'm going to make a guess, right? You are listening to this because you want more in life.

0:45Whatever more means to you, you want more, whether that's more money, more happiness, more joy, more peace, more traveling, more fun, more success, more quality relationships. You want more. And you know that in order to get more, you have to change. You've gotten to the point where you're probably not wanting to blame anybody else anymore. And you're going, well, damn it. If my life is going to be different, I have to be different. But you know, you want this life that you want in the future. And it feels like it's, it's possible, but it's just a little bit out of your grasp and you don't have it yet because you are not the person who can get it yet.

1:28Because if you were, you would have already achieved what it is that you want to achieve. You have to understand that if you were the type of person who could create that life that you see in the future, you would already have that life if you were the type of person who could have it. And so you know, hopefully, or by the end of this episode, you will definitely know that it is not the external world that needs to change. It is not circumstances that need to change. It is you that needs to change. And so what I would recommend is if you can grab a pen and paper, go and grab a pen and paper because we're going to work together.

2:01There's going to be a working episode, working session. If you're driving your car, if you're at the gym, just think really deeply about the questions that I'm going to ask you here. This is an exercise that I take people through a lot of times when they're on coaching calls with me or they're at events that I'm running. And I want you to think of your perfect life in 10 years, whatever that means to you. And I want you to get as detailed as you possibly can because a lot of times people are like, I'm like, what do you want? They're like, I don't really know what I want, right? You've got to get very clear on what it is that you want because you're not going to be able to create it if you don't know exactly what it is.

2:38And so I want you to envision your perfect life in 10 years. And if you got a pen and paper, just start jotting things down and start writing things down as I'm talking. If you're at the gym, you're working out, start allowing your visions to start coming through. Start allowing yourself to daydream a little bit while you're doing this. What does your perfect life look like in 10 years? How happy are you? How do you talk to yourself? Where do you live? What does the perfect house look like in 10 years? What's the location look like? Is it a small condo in Manhattan? Is that the perfect place for you?

3:15Is it a townhouse? Is it a huge mansion that's Spanish style? Is it modern? Do you have property? Do you have no property? Are you on a mountain? Are you on a river? Are you in the middle of nowhere? What does it look like to you? You have to see it. You have to get clear with it. You got to be able to like taste it and touch it with your mind almost, right? Where is it located? What's your family look like? What's your relationships look like? What does your bank account look like? And I want you to detail as much of it as you possibly can. And the key to it as you're doing this is to make sure that you act like a four-year-old.

3:52And what do I mean by acting like a four-year-old is that don't be realistic because there's no such thing as realistic. There really isn't. There is no such thing as being realistic. Being realistic means taking other people's expectations and planting it onto yourself. And so when you're four years old, remember being four, are you ever been around a four year old? Like it's like magic. They can do anything. And they have this mindset where there is nothing that can hold them back. And so for this moment, as you're, you're writing down everything that you want, allow yourself to be four years old again.

4:24Don't restrict yourself. Allow yourself to have fun with it. Okay. And if you need to pause me as we're going through today's episode so you can journal through it, no problem. Pause me. I'll be here literally forever whenever you want to push play again. Okay? The next thing I want you to ask yourself is when you're looking at this life, imagine that it's not you. Imagine that it's somebody else, right? When you're looking at this life and everything that you want in the future, what are the traits of someone who could create that life? if somebody has gone and created that life or somebody could create that life in the future describe that person to me in as much detail as you possibly can everything what time do they wake up what do they do on a daily basis what do they eat do how often do they work out how do they take care of their body how do they take care of their soul how do they take care of their mindset what type of people they surround themselves with?

5:21How do they speak to others? How do they speak to themselves? How do they walk through the world? What type of energy do they have? How do they carry themselves? How do they interact with themselves and how do they interact with the world? And what you want to do is you want to get into as much detail and don't pretend that it's you at all. I want you to see, okay, perfect life. And if somebody were able to create this perfect life, who would it be? What would they be like? And describe that person in as much detail as possible. Sometimes it's good to disassociate yourself from your dreams so that you don't put any restriction on it.

5:58And you just say, this person that has created that life, this is as much as I can tell you about them. Okay. And then what you're going to do is you're going to figure out what is the difference between that person who you just described in you now what's the difference between the two of them and you start figuring out okay if that person created that life all i really need to do is wake up every single day and start becoming that person more and more start acting like that person start thinking like that person start speaking like that person start speaking to others like that person started speaking to myself like that other like that person and you literally start to say i need to become that person more and more every day right so what does that person do that you do not do maybe they don't stay up late maybe they don't sleep in maybe they don't eat like maybe they don't talk negatively to yourself maybe they don't stay in contact with toxic people right and you start to figure out what's the difference between me and what's the difference between them?

7:05And you start to plan out what changes you need to make within yourself in order to create that life. And you can do a little, what I like to call stop, start, and continue. Stacey, I want you to stop doing this. Stacey, I want you to start doing this. And Stacey, I want you to continue doing this. And I took that when I was first a brand new manager and I started molding it for people to be able to do for themselves. And so what I want you to do is say okay in order for me to shift myself into who i currently am into that person what do i need to stop doing and you start writing all the things that you need to stop doing i need to stop talking trash myself i need to stop eating crappy food i need to stop staying up late i need to stop sleeping in i need to stop saying that i'm going to do something and not following through right so you write down all of the things that you need to stop doing that are holding you back from from creating in life that you want.

7:58Then you ask yourself, what do I need to start doing? And once again, everybody, you can pause me as you're going through this. If you're taking notes and you're journaling and you want to use this as a working session, what do I need to start doing? Okay. I need to start going to bed earlier. I need to start waking up earlier. I need to start doing my morning workouts every single morning. I need to develop a morning routine. These are all of the things I want to start doing. I need to start taking out all of my meals, planning them out and getting them done and prepped by the beginning of the week.

8:24What do you need to start doing in order to be more like that person? And what do you need to continue doing that you're already doing pretty well and you're on the right path? And you don't put any emotion into this. You don't put any judgment into this. You don't put any shame into it. It's literally just as if you were just making business decisions. And we will be right back. And now, back to the show. What do we need to stop doing so that I can become more like that person that I see that has that perfect life, the life that I want? What do I need to start doing to be more like that person?

8:54and what do I need to continue doing to be more like that person as well? And what you realize, and it's really interesting as you start to realize it, is that it's not necessarily what you have to do. Like there's definitely things that you have to do in order to become successful, in order to change and all of that. But it's more than anything else, it's who you need to be, right? So it's not necessarily what you need to do. It's who you need to be. You need to wake up every morning and be that person. just be that person every single day. You know, this person is now the new goal that you shoot for every single day.

9:33One of the things that I love and I think is so important is that Tony Robbins says this in one of the videos that I've seen him say, and he says, when you see this guy that's in front of you, this isn't how it was born, I built this motherfucker. And that's how he actually says, he's like, I built this motherfucker that you see in front of me. That's exactly what you need to do is to build that version of you. That person that you see that has the life that you want is now your new goal to shoot for every single day, to be more like that person every single day. That life that you saw that is the perfect life to you, that's just a byproduct of this person and who they are and what they do every single day.

10:14And so when you are the type of person that can create that life, you automatically are going to start to do the things that you need to do. So obviously you can't just sit there and just meditate on being this person. You have to go out into the world and do things. But as you start to develop this character that you want to turn into, you actually start to take the actions that that character would take. So you don't really necessarily need to worry about what you need to do. You still need to do the things, but you worry about who you are and who you're becoming more than anything else. Who you are and who you're becoming.

10:48And you start using this person as like your North Star. like you're guiding light and you start to say, okay, like maybe you wake up. Oh my God, I'm so tired. I want to hit the snooze alarm. You ask yourself this question, would the best version of myself in 10 years hit the snooze? Would the best version of myself in 10 years stay up late? Would the best version of myself in 10 years have an extra whiskey? Whatever it might be that you're doing. And you use this as a kind of way to decipher and figure out in this weird world that we live in and we're creating what's the best action for me to take and what's next not the best action for me to take because all too often I hear from people on coaching calls I just I'm self-sabotage self-sabotage self-sabotage self-sabotage self-sabotage is going well I could become I could take the right action to become the person I want to be or I couldn't you know what it's easier not to so I'm just not going to that's what self-sabotage is.

11:45Taking the same actions over and over again that keep you stuck in the place that you're currently in. How do you get out of self-sabotage? Take different actions that are just completely different than what you normally would. So you use this person as your North Star. What's the best, what would the best version of myself in 10 years do? Would they be doing what I'm doing now? Like if you're, if you're trying to become more self-aware and you sit there and you say, would the best version of myself in 10 years be doing this? If the answer is yes, keep doing it. go for it do exactly what you're doing if that's what they would do if you're sitting there and you're saying would the best version of me in 10 years do what i'm doing right now if the answer is no ask yourself what would they do don't shame yourself don't be an asshole to yourself don't beat yourself up don't guilt yourself that's what people tend to do oh my god i'm not doing what i need to be doing boohoo and then they get all mad at themselves no just okay so reassess okay it's not okay this is not what they were doing okay what would they be doing and then you just stop what you're doing immediately and you just start doing what they would do.

12:44It's not, it's not honestly rocket science, but what it is, is it is a way to first off, start to plan out the life that you want, plan out who you need to become, and then have a, a, a practice of self-awareness of what it is that you need to do in the moment to become that person more. And so you start to really dive into it as you, it's the question is kind of like the question I've said many times, which is what was taught to me by one of my first mentors, which is, is what I'm doing right now getting me closer to or further from my goals? But the question is, is what I'm doing right now getting me closer to or further from my goals?

13:21If it's getting me closer to my goals, then I'm just going to keep doing it. If it's getting me further from my goals, I need to stop it immediately. But it's this developing of the self-awareness to look at myself in the moment, take myself out of my body, look at myself as a third person and say, okay, is this thing that I'm doing right here getting me closer to my goals? Or in what were the context we're saying today, would the perfect version of me be doing what I'm doing right now? Yes. Awesome. Perfect. Keep doing it. That's getting you close to your goals. Would the perfect version of me be doing what I'm doing right now?

13:56Not necessarily. They wouldn't. Okay. What would they be doing? Don't beat yourself up. Don't guilt yourself don't shame yourself just make a quick change what would they be doing oh they'd be doing this okay i'm going to take this action with a perfect version of me hit the snooze button damn it no they wouldn't what would they do they would wake up and they would go through the morning routine all right well then i'm just going to do what they would do and you're not you're not building yourself based off of some some person that that is has a status that she feels unattainable of like, oh my gosh, there's this billionaire that I follow that's very successful.

14:31I want a life like theirs because sometimes it just feels like they're too far away. It feels like sometimes I found with people as people get demotivated when they find somebody that's so far away. Oh my gosh, this guy's worth a billion dollars and he's the person I want to follow. And then you wake up in the morning, you're like, would this person do this? And you're like, screw it. This person's so far ahead of me. I'm never going to get there. But if you look at the perfect version of yourself, knowing that you could build yourself into that, you say, would that perfect version of me do this?

14:57and then what is the practice to make you more aware of when you fall off the path like what is the practice is it you know setting an alarm every 30 minutes in your phone randomly and whenever it goes off you just go what am i doing and you just become more aware so that you're not just in autopilot because according to harvard about 48 of what we do on a daily basis is autopilot and that autopilot has gotten you to where you are and so if we want to change our lives, we're going to have to change what it is that we do on autopilot sometimes. And so you have to develop some sort of practice to make you more aware of when you fall off the path and then immediately get you back on the path.

15:36And really what it's about is acting as if you already are that person. What would your life be like if you took that person and planted them into your day today and started becoming that person? If you started acting like that person, doing what that person does, talking to yourself the way that person talks to himself, talking to other people the way they talk to themselves paying attention to who they surround themselves with and you just start becoming that version of you and you fast forward to 10 years from today with having this self-awareness practice you will create the life that you want and i guarantee you it's going to be even better than you could possibly imagine in your life but what it comes down to is you deciding that you are going to change into the person that you actually want to be doesn't matter what anybody else wants what it matters is what do you want what are you trying to create and what do you need to do to get there but most importantly who do you need to be in order to get there so that's what i got for you for today's episode if you love this episode please share it on instagram stories tag me at rob dial jr rob d i a l j r the only way this podcast grows is from you guys actually sharing it so if you would do me a massive favor if you get value from what i put out there you want to help us on the podcast but also help us change the world and you know have more people become aware of the podcast because there's more people in this world who don't know this podcast exists than do.

16:55Just do me a favor, share it so that we can try to keep impacting more and more people. And with that, I'm going to leave the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make someone else's day better. I appreciate you, and I hope that you have an amazing day.