I Have $1,400 To My Name and I'm Considering Bankruptcy

30:09I would think that that's far more valuable than being in a classroom, being taught concepts. I work, both Jade and I work with film, literary folks, men and women from the film industry that are here on staff that video everything and all the things all the time and edit and cut and produce. And I don't know a single one of them has an MBA. yeah I I'm not trying to you're there I'm not but I've just it doesn't feel it doesn't seem like it's going to return what you think it's going to return and to John's point it's a lot of time and money lost I think if you can find a way to work while doing this and you're getting the getting it paid for for scholarships or for free fine but to lose three years without work.

30:57I don't know about that. I might go back to the drawing board on that plan. And I remember a lot of my students went to grad school because they were bored with their current lives or they didn't like their current jobs. And that's not a reason to pause for two or three years, take out a bunch of debt or not make an income. So just think all the way through it.

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33:31Click the link in the show notes or go to ramsysolutions.com slash events to learn more. Let's go out to H-Tone and talk to John. Hey, John, what's up, brother? Hey, y 'all. So I am on baby step one, maybe two and a half. I am$79 ,000 in debt at 26. I got fired in March of 2025 for my job. I've been living purely on my VA income, which is about$3 ,000 a month at this point. and I'm still a certified paramedic. I'm going back to school with the VA once again, and I just really feel like I'm behind on life at this point and really don't know where to turn with as much debt as I'm in. Well, dude, I'm glad you called, man.

34:21How old are you? 26. 26. You got laid off in March. How come you haven't gone back to work? uh i have been struggling to find jobs that can work with my schedule as a student my job that i got fired from worked pretty well with my school schedule and it really didn't conflict much and being a paramedic uh the only jobs i can really find are with fire departments or private ambulance companies that have pretty oddball schedules that don't really work with school i have a few interviews with hospitals that are hiring paramedics here in houston but i haven't really found much success with getting passed in an interview.

35:01What are you going to school for? I'm going to school for finance, ironically enough. Okay. When are you finished? I'll be finished in October of 2020, not October, December of 2029. Oh, so you're just getting started. Yeah. Can I, can I, so anytime I feel squashed or I feel stuck between an either or decision. One of the things, it's just a practice I run myself through and my wife and I do it, is we just dump a bunch of variables on the table just to remind ourselves we're not trapped. Okay. Because you've trapped yourself. Yeah. You've trapped yourself into this is the only kind of job and has to have this kind of schedule and I have to get this degree in this area right now.

35:47And I kind of am locked into where I go to school because I'm on VRE as a disabled veteran, so they determine my schooling and everything like that because they consider it vocational rehab, and that's the other side of it. But you can't pause for a year and get your feet underneath you financially? They would require me to pay back what they've already set forth for school. All right. Then if that's the case, then you're going to have to pause looking for paramedic jobs, especially since that's not what you're going to school for. And you're going to have to look at becoming a teller at a local bank, learning finance from the floors, like sweeping the floors on up.

36:28You're going to have to let that dream go for a season. Because here's my concern. I can hear it in your voice. This is less – and Jay's going to walk you through the money part of this, but you've stopped believing in yourself. Yeah. Yeah. And that's like getting up and going and contributing to a thing is way more important than making sure it's in the field that you want or you happen to have a certification because of your military, all that kind of stuff. Brother, you need to get up where people see you and they're like glad that you're there. Yeah. Right. Especially if you were telling me you're going to go to nursing school or you're going to do something like that would make sense that you're trying to get a job in a hospital.

37:08Right now, you're just pausing the workforce. Yeah. And you're getting a degree in a totally different field. So start getting experience in that field. So four years from now, you've got four years working at a local bank doing stuff or a local credit union, and you got a degree in finance. And now you're ready to hit the road. Do you get what I'm saying? Yes, sir. Okay. Jay, talk to this good man about his money situation. Tell me about the$79 ,000 of debt. What type of debt is that? So I have$14 ,000 in student loans from paramedic school because I wasn't approved for the GI bill when I first got out of the service.

37:43So I have$14 ,000 in student debt. I have a$15 ,000 personal loan that I use to pay off all my credit cards. At the time when I was working, I think the interest rate is on its only 5%. It was a good idea at the time because it helped ease a lot of my burden. Instead of paying multiple banks, I was just paying one loan. And it's my car that's$800 a month as well. And that interest rate is 7%. What's the full balance on the car? $38 ,000. Okay. Where's the rest? I got$68 ,000 here. uh the rest is i think uh i mean let me see my car here i might have miscalculated on my is it 48 it's 48 you're right yes okay so that's the glaringly obvious thing right now you're basically making 4 800 from the va a year and your car is 48 000 yeah so we have that's some the good news Is that something you can make right like this weekend?

38:52This weekend, brother. Okay. Do you have any money saved anywhere? I've spent my whole savings when I first got fired. Okay. Trying to keep afloat. Okay. So here's what I think the plan of action is. First off, we're going to give you every dollar because I think that you don't have a budget. And so Christian's going to pick up. We'll get you every dollar. And that's going to help you see with the$3 ,000 that you're currently making, to John's point, you're going to start making more, but today you make 3 ,000. We're going to see how much margin you have. And we're going to set a plan for how quickly can you save up a little bit of cash so that you can get out of this$48 ,000 car and into a cash car that you're maybe paying four or 5 ,000 bucks for.

39:34That's the plan. And so that's like, I want all forces focused and trained on that mission. And then once you do that, we can say, okay, now we just have 30 ,000, 29 ,000 to clear out here. And we're going to start with whatever smallest. If the student loans are broken up to pieces, we'll start with throwing any extra money on that smallest student loan and do it like that. So this is something that you can get out of. What's going to really break you free is income. That is the magical elixir for this entire deal here. So imagine your life, even if you just go get a job making the 36 grand, another 3000 bucks a month, think about how that changes your life.

40:15Yeah. If you suddenly have 6 ,000 bucks and especially if you're doing it towards the field you want to get into even peripherally, right? Like, like cleaning the trash bins at a local, at a local credit union, it gets you in the door, right? Yeah, it does. And so I, I would exhale and put my dreams of being a paramedic to rest and get on about, if that's what you want to do finance for whatever reason, if that's what you want to do, I would put all my energy going that away. How upside down are you on this truck?

40:51It's not that. What do you mean by upside down? Do you owe more on it than you could sell it for? It's a 2026. So what do you think you could sell it for private party? I'm not even sure on that side. So if it's anything less than 48, that would mean you're upside down. So let's say you owe$48 ,000, but when you look it up on the Kelly Blue Book, it says, I don't know,$46 ,000 or$45 ,000. That'd mean that you're$2 ,000 to$3 ,000 upside down on it. Okie dokie. And don't look to go trade it in. Look to sell it to somebody on Facebook Marketplace. And put in the ad, I'm a veteran selling my truck or my car.

41:34It's in great condition. Here's what I'm asking for it. And get that sucker sold. And then you'll feel the weight of this just leave your shoulders almost overnight. And if you are upside down, what you would do is you would just go over to the bank or credit union, wherever you can get somebody to loan you the$3 ,000 or whatever it is. Hopefully you're not upside down. But if you are, that's what you would do because you're going to need the full amount to get the title. So if you sell it private party, you're going to need to put whatever you owe with it in order to get that and get a clean title.

42:06Yeah. So thanks for the call, brother. Thank you for your service. And it feels like you are way behind and you're under a huge mountain. The good news is you're only 26. You've got a long way to go. You're in school. You're doing the right things. You just got to get some right things in order. And you got to get out from underneath that big, giant car payment. This is The Ramsey Show.

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44:07Welcome back to the Ramsey Show in the Fairwinds Credit Union studio. I'm John Deloney, joined by best-selling author and wonderful human being Jade Warshall, taking your calls on money, life, your relationships, whatever you got going on, your work, all of it. 888-825-5225. Let's go out to Phoenix, Arizona and talk to Shelby. Hey, Shelby, what's going on? Hi, how's it going? We're doing great. How about you? doing good today excellent excellent what's going on so i am almost out of debt i'm so close i can taste it congratulations how much have you paid off so far just over 50 000 oh my goodness amazing great work what's up so i'm almost out of debt but it feels like my mom wants to keep me in debt every little thing that happens she's offering me money oh just pay me back 20 a month just pay me back.

45:00And I don't want to do that. I'm so close. I don't want to take more money, but at the same time, it would really help me. Okay. So this is like classic temptation. Of course, the idea sounds good, but you've already decided it's not good for you to do that. So it's a moot point, right? And it's something like she did loan me some money recently. I had emergency mental work done and I have a thousand dollars a thousand dollars saved no more than that and it was the point like I need it done but my card will decline if I try to pay it and I'm sitting here in the dentist chair and so she's she's offering you the money is what you're saying yes and I took that it felt like I gave her a little bit and now it's bigger things oh you have to pay three thousand in taxes let me loan you money just pay me back someday or you don't have to say yes I know and I don't know how to broach that because it's coming from a good place.

45:55She wants to help me. And yes, it would help. This has nothing to do with her. I was going to say, thank you, John. Go ahead. This has to do with you. Like, cause you know who else is sitting right there wanting to offer you money? Visa, MasterCard, local bank. And it's all in the same vein of, I'm not going to borrow money anymore. Especially from somebody I've got a close relationship to that would drive a wedge between us. yeah and i told her like i don't want you to be my lender you're my mom what did you tell you though i would graciously take it she just wants me to take it she's like oh it would help let me help of course it would help of course it would help but that's not that's not what we're doing here yeah that's what we're doing here and i'd even go back further I mean walking into the dentist that couldn't have surprised you right?

46:53It was an emergency dental work. I get that it was an emergency but every dentist I've ever met has some sort of payment plan some sort of program some sort of I can give you$500 today I can give you$1 ,000 today it's going to wipe out my emergency fund and then I'll give you like I don't know any dentist that doesn't have some sort of plan because they deal with that all the time. Nobody has mental insurance. My plan I had there was$1 ,200 today and$1 ,200 next week, which I couldn't afford, so she did help me. But now it's an even bigger thing. She wants to help me pay my taxes. She wants me to get veneers for my wedding.

47:25Great. Oh, just pay me back. The answer to all that is I'm so grateful, but no thank you. Okay. That's it. And then you are going to have to go through and get wedding photos without new veneers on. Yeah. You're going to have to scratch and claw and work extra and do whatever to pay your taxes. By the way, by April, right? No, I'm sorry. Yeah, by April. Yes, I made$3 ,000 by then. Yeah, you can do that. You're so close. How much do you have left? With the$2 ,500 my mom just gave me, it put me back up to$9 ,000 left. Okay, how much do you make? I make between$60 ,000 and$90 ,000 in a year most of my income is bonus.

48:13But like last year, I made a 78. Okay. Yeah. I mean, I think the biggest part of this conversation is just you making a decision and drawing that line in the sand that you don't borrow money. And when you do that, it just opens up your mind to creating other scenarios for solving your problems. And I think right now, as much as it kind of feels like my mom is doing this, my mom is doing this, I kind of think that you're putting out a radar. Like I think you're putting out a home. What is it? A homing signal that it comes to you. And I think that's on you to go, you know, I'm not looking for this and I don't want this.

48:53And it's just nowhere in my view. And I think that's going to help a lot. And then I think it's just you saying very clearly to your mom, thank you, but please don't keep offering me because honestly, I'm tempted by it and I don't want to be tempted. I really want to live a debt-free lifestyle and I certainly don't want to owe you money. And I think that's that on that. You got$9 ,000 to go. You've paid off$50 ,000. You've done a great job. There's no doubt in my mind that you can't finish this up and move on to the next steps. And what I'm going to tell you right now is complete and total hogwash.

49:24This has just been my experience with any sort of finish line. Whether it's I want to get a new degree, I'm trying to lose X amount of pounds. I want to be able to run a certain time on a, on a mile, whatever the thing is almost always right before I get to the end. And this is woo woo. The universe sends some huge temptation my way. And it's, it, I I've just come to look at it as it's, I'm being tested. Am I really who I say I am? Right. And you're so close to the end and it just feels like there's a huge, like you're so close. You've worked so hard. You've, you've busted your butt to pay off 50 grand.

50:11And now the temptation is like, are you really all in on this deal? And I can imagine after 50 grand making 75, you've been doing this a while, haven't you? I actually started going crazy at my loans back in this last April. Okay. So my guess is you're tired now and you're bored of this. Oh yeah. I make too much money to feel like I have no money. Okay. Just keep going. Keep going. Yes. Keep going through the boring. Keep going through the tired. Keep going through the inconvenience. You're so close. You're almost there. Making$75 ,000, when are you going to be done with this thing? Three months?

50:53I hope so. Will you commit to Jay and I that you'll be done? I've only got two left out of the five loans. Do what? I only have two of the five loans left, so I'm almost, it's there. Oh, man. What's your margin every month? What are you putting towards this every month? So where I am in the snowball right now is 510. That's like all my paid off minimums and the new minimums. And I'm throwing maybe another 7 ,800 towards it a month. 7 ,800? What's your take home every month? ends up being about$4 ,000 to$5 ,000. Plus every other paycheck, I get a bonus anywhere between$0 and$2 ,000. Every other check, you get a$2 ,000 bonus.

51:44So wouldn't this go a little bit faster? It feels like it. I had a lot of moving costs that put a halt in it, and my last two bonuses have been$0. Okay, understood. So you're feeling a little bit deflated, I think. Yeah. but I think that the last couple of weeks or even the last couple of months are not an accurate snapshot of the intensity that you have been working this. I think you've just had a couple of things that have really made you feel some type of way. I just want to encourage you to keep going. This is going to be gone faster than you think. I think you just have to remember how quickly you were going before the dentist hit, before the move hit, before all those other things.

52:25This is going to be gone before you know it and you're going to feel a major weight off. Hey, don't forget to replace your$1 ,000 emergency fund. I think that's also going to help you going forward. And when you don't believe you can do it, remember, Jade and I believe in you. Keep going.

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54:18Let's go out to Wilmington, Delaware and talk to Jamie. What's up, Jamie? Hi. How are we doing? Good. How are you? Thank you so much for taking my call. I'm a huge fan. Of course. Thanks for calling. So my question is, I have a little bit of a dilemma and I don't know how to handle it because I've already tried it in a couple different ways. But my fiance and I have been together for 20 years. And I know that sounds a lot. We're not married yet. When did you get engaged? We have been engaged for 12. Nice. I have so many questions, but I won't even ask them. Go ahead. Okay. Yeah, that's a whole different topic.

54:59So he bought a house about 10 years ago. Well, actually, seven years ago. I've been living with him for 10. Anyhow, when it was kind of a rush closing and I was never put on the deed or the loan, for that matter, because my credit was never that great. Well, recently, my dad passed away within the last five years, and he had everything in order when he passed. And it was a burden off me and my family's shoulders. and I'm trying to do the same you know for my kids I know I'm not going to be here forever but whenever I bring this up to him like hey I think I should we should put my name on here in case something happens he either pushes it aside or he kind of comes up with stuff like you know your credit's bad they're going to come and take the house or we'll get in an argument and And, you know, it's he thinks I'm just after it for the house and I'm not.

55:54Now, on a side note, in the deed, there's a clause that is a first right of refusal because it's bumped up against businesses property. So if it if something happens, they would actually get the first right to buy it if it doesn't come to me. Interesting. So he could send it to his family, but his family would turn around and say, OK, well, I'll sell it to you for dirt cheap. But they would have the first right of refusal before I would even get it. And I don't know how to address it because I've always brought it up. And like I said, it just keeps pushing aside. But I would like to have some kind of security in knowing that if anything happens to him, that I would be able to have some place to live.

56:36What is, okay, yes. Tell me the finance side of it. Who pays for the house? He pays for the mortgage. Like when I moved in, the deal was he would pay the mortgage and the utilities and I pay anything extra, groceries, cable, anything like that. And will that be the fact after you get married as well? Yes. And in your mind, do you guys have separate bank accounts? Yes. Okay. So here's what I'm going to say. This is controversial. You're operating separate lives. You're just living in the same house because financially you're separate. You've spent 20 years, 12 years betrothed and have not committed.

57:26I can, part of me understands he's just going in line with the way everything's always been. You're separate. You're not on the mortgage. Therefore, you're not on the deed. My money's over here. Your money's over there. I can understand why it is that way. So unless you guys are going to fully commit, and when I say fully, John, this is your space. But unless you're going to do that, you're getting the spoils of what you guys have put in place. My guess is, and I can be way out to lunch here because every state is so different. my guess is you'd have a common law claim to this um that does not go into play anymore okay well here's here's the i never looked into that i would look into it but here is the um under the guise of behavior as a language i think he is telling you loud and clear this isn't your house it will never be your house You can live here, but this is not yours.

58:36You're not going to have a claim to it. Stop asking me about it. Right? Yeah. Okay. And there's something powerful about just clearing all of the ice and snow off the sidewalk and standing firm and saying, this is what this sidewalk looks like. So what am I supposed to do? Should I, like, save up and find something just in case something happens to him that I would be... You have to ask yourself, is he the father of your children? No, he's not. Okay, how old are your kids? They're all adults. They're 27, 25, and 23. Okay, do you have your own retirement, your own savings? Yes. What does that look like?

59:26Well, my retirement, it's a pension. and then I actually am on baby step two so my savings isn't that fantastic right now but it should be a thousand bucks and you're trying to feverishly pay off debt yes yeah I'm on step two and I'm rolling with it and it feels wonderful right now so I'm hoping that that feeling stays for a long time this is this is a gross simplification I'm going to say it's going to sound rude and if we were talking in person I would take a lot longer before I said this but we've got to compress time because we're on the radio okay yes you've been playing house for two decades and at some point the play stops and it feels like you are recognizing oh he could go in any day like all of us could no and I'm going to be left with nothing yes and just to add to that But what you're requesting is a simple piece of paperwork to be added to the deed.

1:00:27It's easy. It's not much. It's not at all. And I even asked him, too, and I was like, well, if you're so concerned about it, then put one of the kids on it. You know, put one of the kids. I mean, I know they're not his biologically, but, I mean, he raised him. I mean, we've been together, like I said, 20 years, and my youngest is 23. But it's not just that, though. It's not just that. He also hasn't married you. Yeah. Am I right? I don't want to overstep, but would you have gotten married way sooner if he would have done it? Well, we were planning on getting married, and that's like I said, the whole other point.

1:01:06It's like when we got engaged, my oldest was just getting ready to start college. So we did the whole financial aid thing, and it would have really messed up my kids' financial aid. They got a lot of scholarships. They got a lot of grants because I didn't make a lot. Okay, I understand. If we would have gotten married, that would have screwed up the kids' financial aid. So you figure every two years and they were going to school for four years. But it's still been 12 years. But it's still been 12 years. So, again, I'm not trying to overstep, but that is saying something. Yeah. Behavior is a language.

1:01:41Okay. And so here's the thing. You can't make him do anything. All you can decide is here is what I'm worth. here's what I value and I want to be with people who think I have worth and who value me now and after they're gone okay any self-respecting husband and I'm going to call him that even though y 'all aren't officially married y 'all been together for 20 years and whatever builds an entire ecosystem so that his wife carries on when he's gone it's a shame that what is it 77 % of households don't have a will it's embarrassing yeah right it's a shame that you would you would possibly consider that when you die your house is going to go to somebody else and the old girlfriend's just going to be out on her own it's it's it's it's so shameful I'm embarrassed on behalf of men everywhere yeah I mean the property's beautiful you know and it's just it doesn't matter if it's a one bedroom shack it's been y 'alls but he's on the piece of paper and anytime you bring it up he makes you feel dumb for it let me say it this way you're not crazy you just get to decide what's next okay okay and like Jade said it's not a it's a very low stress thing to add you to a deed exactly it just is but my guess is he has actively kept you off the deed because this is his house that you are living in that he's paying for that he's going to pass on to his family and if that's the case and you get and you decide to stay with him great you need to make other options make other plans with savings paying off debt getting yourself set up for the inevitable day when one of you till death does you all part right um or you can say i'm worth more than this I just am and I'm going to be with somebody who's going to care for me now and sets up a plan for me after I'm gone

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1:05:45The Ramsey Show question of the day is brought to you by Y-Refi. If your private student loans are in default, it's time for a plan. Y-Refi helps you refinance defaulted private student loans into a low fixed rate payment so you can get back on the baby steps and start making progress. Go to Y-Refi.com slash Ramsey. That's the letter Y-R-E-F-Y dot com slash Ramsey. Ramsey, and it may not be available in all states. All right. Today's question comes from Brianna in Nevada. She says, when I try to explain to my husband what a waste it is to eat out, he gets offended. I tell him we can eat out for a hundred bucks and never see that money again, or I can buy groceries for a hundred bucks and that lasts for a week.

1:06:28His response is always, but eating out still fed you. So you survived. Okay. He's trading the convenience of eating out for our long-term goals of paying off debt and saving for a down payment. How can I convince him that eating out is keeping us from reaching our financial goals? Okay, so I think what's actually at play is just two sets of values here. He's willing to go to a certain extent to pay off debt, and you're willing to go beyond the extent that he's willing to go, if that makes sense. Oh boy, oh boy. Okay. So I wish these are the ones, John, I wish we had more to it. I'd love to know how much debt they had.

1:07:12I'd love to know what their income is. I'd love to know a little bit more. I want to know who cooks in this house and maybe it's not great. Yeah. We have to eat out. Honestly, facts. That is a real part of it. Some people eat to survive and eat to live and other people eat for enjoyment. I'm a person, if it doesn't taste good, I just, I don't eat it. I'd rather eat two bites of something that's delicious than a whole meal of something that's terrible. Like I just can't. So my guess is you're probably going about this all wrong. We've got to figure out a way to make this exciting for both people.

1:07:46I'm guessing it's a, I'm guessing you guys never aligned on why we're doing all of this to begin with. That's it. To me, this looks like to me, like, like eating out has become the proxy war for the real issue, which is we're not aligned on sacrificing to get to a common goal. Yeah. And, oh boy, let me just tread into this for a second. And the truth is there's two people, right? He has a set of values. You have a set of values. You want to align on how are we going to do our money? You have to decide which hills you're going to die on because you're trying to get, in many ways, you're trying to get a little deer to come to you and do these baby steps.

1:08:28You don't want to scare it away. So if everything else is like trucking along and it's like, hey, we're making progress. This is just the one area that they're a little bit reticent to come on board. Oh, all right. Like what's a way that we can slowly make that transition versus bashing somebody on the head of you're doing 99 % of the things I asked you to do. Where's the, and then you're slamming them for the 1%, right? Maybe uncommon opinion, but maybe that's, maybe it's better than we think, right? Does that, do you see what I'm saying with this? Or can we agree, no appetizers, no drinks, and we don't have to get ribeyes, and do we have to eat out, does it have to cost 100 bucks, or can it cost 40, or can it cost 35, right?

1:09:11I would just hate for this one thing to be the bone of contention when so many other things are maybe on track or hitting right. And it usually is one of two things, right? It's that. It is somebody that, you know, amazing is the enemy of perfection, right? It's got to be perfect. Or this is one of many, many places where they're not aligned. This is just the easiest place for everybody to land. yes right and we fight about we fight about eating out we fight about money but there's that's just the tip of the iceberg yes and and only only brianna knows that if that's the case then 100 there's there's many things at stake here but if truly you can look at the situation and go it's like my husband making up the bed every day he's making up the bed he may not do it exactly to the t the way i make up the bed but the man is making up the bed so i'm just gonna I'll leave that right there.

1:10:02And let me flip that around. I make the bed often. It's kind of like whoever's the last one out makes a bed. And I notice sometimes that I come back in after making the bed. Sheila's redone it. It's nicer than when I did it. Yeah. And that used to make me mad. I used to be like, oh, I'm not. And now it's like, you know what? She can do whatever she wants to. If she didn't say anything and she just went back in and remade it. Awesome. Amazing. We both won. We both won. And here's the deal, Brianna, at the end of the day. You don't have to go out. Yeah, he could go by himself. You don't have to go out to eat.

1:10:35You can say, I'm going to save that money and I want to stay committed to the goals that we made. And so if you feel like you need to go out, great. I'll just stay here and eat the napkins in the glove box because I guess somebody's got a... It's leading by example, which is pretty awesome. I'll just have yogurt and granola and we'll call it or whatever. But you don't have to go. You don't have to go. You've got more autonomy in this thing than you think you do. But I, I don't know. I think there's a conversation beneath this conversation, which is are we aligned on this deal? I agree. All right, let's go out to San Antonio, Texas and talk to Lily.

1:11:10Hey, Lily, what's going on? Hi. Yes, so I am currently enrolled in an online class at GCU. I'm studying for education, and they have me with – they put – my account, they linked it with, like, the FAFSA, a subsidized loan. However, my mom offered to take out equity on the house and then pay her back. Okay. What if you stop doing everything that you're doing except for going to school and just doing that somewhere else? Yeah. So I currently also work full time and the program at GCU is one class every eight weeks. And that really works for - Did you say at TCU? GCU, yeah. GCU. Giant climbing university.

1:12:02Yeah, yeah. Uh-huh. So a private, online, faith-based university. Yes. Woo! Very expensive, correct? Yes. Yes. It is. It's$1 ,500 per class. Okay. Oh, gosh. Whereas you could get a teaching certificate, and by the way, and I don't want to be that guy, but I'm going to be that guy for a second. I worked a full-time job and got two PhDs while working full-time jobs. it was not fun and had kids it was not fun it was miserable right and we just like yeah you do it for a season and then you get on about your life right right and so you're picking a very expensive place and now it's all the way to where your mom's considering putting her house on the block exactly please don't do that to her exactly no and that's what i told her like i don't i don't want to do that don't do this to yourself don't do this to any like there's there's This tells me that you didn't look through a whole bunch of other options because there are other options in your area.

1:13:02Why does it have to be this one in your mind? In my mind, it's because it's online and it's more flexible. Oh, so we're just looking for flexible online school. That's the criteria? I love that. That means there's tons of options. Tons of options. Yes. Yeah, I also saw the Western Governors University, GWGU. How much cheaper is that one? A lot. A lot, a lot. And by the way, I've worked at multiple faith-based universities, private schools. I love them. I'm a huge believer in them. But I'm not a believer in mortgaging your souls for it. I'm not a believer in your mom putting her house on the block for it.

1:13:44Exactly. Right? And so, yeah, you feel like you've boxed yourself in. So, I mean, that's not why you called, but I want you to be a teacher. We need more great teachers out there. We really, really do. I don't want you to go into debt up to your eyeballs and then have your mom breathing down you. The whole thing seems like a mess. Exactly. That's why I was calling because I didn't feel comfortable about it. Yeah. I didn't hear your original thing. Your FAFSA is linked to who? So, like, I guess the way I did it when I applied to GCU, they linked my account to do the FAFSA subsidized loan. So it was already going to start, because I got some money from the Pell Grant, but then after that money runs out, they were going to start putting it on the loan.

1:14:38Yeah, but I bet the Pell Grant will cover Western Governors. Exactly. Yeah. And just a quick question. Do you guys recommend that? I recommend, here's what I recommend. Don't borrow money. Yeah, exactly. And if you start with that as a chief principal, it narrows your options. And if you're really, if you really want to like, you're determined to be a teacher, you'll find a way. And you'll be tired and you'll be exhausted and you'll have to do things that are inconvenient, whatever. But you'll get out and you won't owe anybody anything. So that's what we recommend. But check out other options if that's your criteria because there's many out there.

1:15:35This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. All right, as we head into the new year, I want you to take an inventory of all of the junk you're carrying. You know, all those things you have to do, all those things you think you should do, all of the past hurts, all the past pains, all the past guilt and shame, all of it. When the world feels heavy, it's important to look in the mirror and consider maybe for the first time setting down that old weight and choosing not to carry it forward into 2026. Therapy can help you identify the heavy stuff, set it down and move forward with clarity so you can focus on who you want to become in the new year.

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1:17:08buying or selling your home is a really big deal and you want an expert in your corner fighting for you to find the best deal for the right price the ramsey trusted program is the only way to find a top agent you can trust who will help make your home a blessing not a burden It's easy. Just compare agent profiles, interview them, and choose the right one for you. Find a local Ramsey Trusted Real Estate Pro for free at ramseysolutions.com slash agent, or click the link in the description if you are listening on YouTube or podcast. Let's go back to Houston and talk to Dustin. Hey, Dustin, what's going on?

1:17:49Hey, John. How are you? I'm good, brother. How are you, man? I'm doing well. It's a pleasure to talk to both of you. I'm a long-time listener and a first-time caller. I just need some guidance. My question is, would you guys recommend me buying a house even though I don't like the job I'm currently in? I am 28 years old, single, never married, and no kids. I have a good down payment of about$93 ,000, various stock options of about$13 ,000, $44 ,000 in an IRA,$18 ,000 of three to six months of emergency fund, and$35 ,000 in 401k. As you guys can tell, I have been saving money for years at this point, and I'm just in a job that I'm not really passionate about, and I need your guidance, please.

1:18:45I mean, if you think that there's going to be the opportunity for you to move cities here coming up in the next three to five years, yeah, I might not put down roots just yet. What do you think the horizon would be for you moving jobs? I'm open to it. I've been based here in Houston my whole life, and I've always wanted to move cities, make a big change like that. What's holding you back? ever? Family. My family is, I'm really close to my family and we're all within a 10 minute span of each other right now. Currently live with my mom. So it's been a big blessing being here with her. I'm just not really sure if I'm ready to make that change.

1:19:34It doesn't sound like it's, you're at a place to buy a house yet. And I always have just an internal hesitation anytime somebody says, quote unquote, they're not following their passion. Unpack that for me a little bit. Do you hate your job? It's a job. I'm not passionate about it. Okay. What have you created outside of work that makes you feel alive, that brings you joy, that hobbies, friends? Hobbies. Honestly, this investing, as you can tell, I've been, I love investing. I love talking to friends about it. It's something I'm truly passionate about. And originally, whenever I went to school, I went to school for this and things happened and I had to shift gears.

1:20:31Just not really sure where the... Here's where I'd rather you spend energy. And Jay, I'd love to hear your thoughts on this because you've made similar changes like I have.

1:20:43Here's the thing. Any path you take is going to be challenging. Staying at home, challenging. Buying a house in Houston, staying in a great job that you just don't – I mean, it's just a job. And trading on the side because it lights you up and hanging out with dudes who like to trade and y 'all talk about that. That would be challenging too. packing up and moving to New Jersey, you're going to go with you, right? Or wherever, whatever city you end up in. And just for an adventure, you'll go with you. So your same concerns and insecurities, all stuff will go with you. That's going to be a challenge.

1:21:16And so you've paralyzed yourself with, I don't know about this. I don't know about that. I don't know about that. I'm interested in you backing all the way out and asking yourself the old Mary Oliver quote, what am I going to do with my one reckless, tiny little life? like who do I want to be what do I think is fun what I think is adventurous you've set yourself up financially pretty amazingly and if staying with your family is is most important cool it's going to come at a cost and if going on adventure is most important that's going to come at a cost and if safety and security like with your job even though you're not like wildly in love with it that's going to come at a cost quitting this and going all in on a new career that will come at a cost.

1:21:59So all your paths are going to come at a cost. It's just you choosing which one do you want to do. You're not attached to anything else. Yeah. I mean, when I listened to what you said, it's kind of, to me, obviously there's no wrong choice here, but the obvious is the life you have, you've been doing that. Like you've tried it. So there's no unknown there. Why not do the thing that's the unknown so you can get some research on that? If you stay where you are, you learn nothing new, but if you actually go try the things that you're thinking of, maybe I do want a different job. Maybe I do want to change the scenery.

1:22:31Go actually try it because Texas will be waiting for you if you ever want to go back. Absolutely. What do you do for a job now? I currently work in oil and gas. Okay. Last I checked, that's not going anywhere, right? No, sir. And you're pretty good at it? I believe so. Okay. So finding a place, especially back in Houston, which is one of the oil and gas meccas, wouldn't be super difficult. It might be hard to come right back in with your stock options and same salary and all that, but you'd find your way back because you're good at what you do. Yes. Fair? Yes, sir. It sounds to me, brother, like you've set yourself up for just a moment as this to either take a risk, like Jade says.

1:23:19You know the life. I love that. You already know this. You know this life. And if it's more than not bringing you the life that you want to have, cool. Or you set yourself up financially to really jump off the bridge and see if you can fly. And if you hate it, great. We'll be back in six months. We'll be back in a year. We'll be back in two years. Jade, one thing I hear a lot is people think if I take this job or if I move to this city, it just feels like forever right and it's there's some freedom in realizing no it doesn't have to be forever i mean specifically in his case he's single he's completely unattached there's nothing keeping him if he goes to new jersey and hates it there's nothing from keeping him from saying well let me try montana all right i hate that let me go to utah right now it's different when you you know are up and moving a family of four right and everybody's dependent you know like obviously there's things that can make uh create more stakes there but for a guy like this he's 28 his family will be there you know what i mean he's got listen you got all the time in the world the the world is your oyster yeah i would i would go try it in your case why leave anything on the table when we used to play basketball back in the day they'd say leave it all on the court yeah and it's the same thing like don't be looking back thinking man i wish i i wonder what it would have been like if i I had just fill in the blank.

1:24:42And normally we take this call from folks who are a hundred grand in debt, who've got kids, got other responsibilities. And we're like, well, slow down, slow down, slow down. Man, you've done the exact opposite, Dustin. You've built yourself a great diving board platform to jump off from. So, yeah, I finally answer. I say go. Yeah, go. Go do something wild and set a deadline on it and always feel free to come back. Jade, what's the big leap you've taken? Coming here. Coming here? Yeah, me too. Yeah. All of my career choices have been a leap, but this is the most recent one. Yeah. It was a leap for us to pack up from all of our friends and family and move across the country.

1:25:22And then it was an even crazier leap to leave everything I knew to come to this madhouse. I think the hardest thing, well, it might be different for people, but I think the community aspect, like what he said, my family's here, my friends are here. I think that's the hard thing because it takes time to build those things. You can go to a job and have a salary and have a check a month later, right? You can put money down on a house and have that instantly. But the things that really make life life and make you you are the people in the relationships. And those are things that take a lot of time.

1:25:58And so the risk is greater because it takes time to see, okay, if I put in and put in and put in, am I going to get the reward after however many years? Maybe you will, maybe you won't. Right. Well, and my wife, if I could go back seven years ago when we moved to Nashville, or eight years ago now, that's what I would tell myself. My wife immediately plugged in with a gang, and it's been amazing. And I've been here eight years, and I'm just now settling into, hey, the power's been off for five days. I got some guys I can call, right? Yeah. And so there is, when you pack up and move, and you leave family, you leave friends, you have to be highly intentional about saying, not only do I have to get a job and not only do I have to turn the internet and the power on, I got to get a gang.

1:27:12Welcome back to the Ramsey Show in the Fairwinds Credit Union studio. I'm John Deloney, joined by Jade Warshaw, taking your calls live. Let's go out to Las Vegas and talk to Stephen. Hey, Stephen, what's up, man? What's up, John? How you doing, buddy? I'm doing good, brother. How can I help, man? Well, so I'll try to make this brief. My wife and I were on baby step two. We're making great progress. As a matter of fact, earlier today I made the last payment on a credit card, got it paid off. Atta boy. Way to go, dude. We're getting it. Honestly, I'm loving it. And I told my wife, I don't care if I'm a multimillionaire, I'm still going to be shopping at thrift stores.

1:27:51I don't see the reason to change that. Very good. Now, what's going on right now is with my mother-in-law. My wife and I have been married for several years. We have a son. I work so she can stay home and be with our son, and I'm very grateful to be able to do that. She is very, very pushy when it comes to money, and she's made some really stupid financial decisions. And she's gotten – she's tried to force my hand several times. When we first got married, I lived in Georgia. She moved in with me, of course, after we got married. Are you talking about your wife or your mother-in-law? Who's pushing?

1:28:26My wife. No, my mother-in-law. Lord help us. No, my wife. So my mother-in-law was pushing me to sell my house at a time when the market was down, and we'd have been 20 grand in the hole had I sold it at that time. She tried to get my wife to leave me if I refused to sell it at that time. Oh, boy. And she's pulled stunts like that several times and recently tried to get me to buy a house, and I told her, look, the market is up. If I buy it, the market's going to correct, and we're going to lose a ton of money. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. This has nothing to do with markets. Like, it says it has to do with any of that stuff.

1:28:57The only thing that matters here is you continuing to give your mother-in-law's wisdom and her advice and her threats and her demands. All of that is about power. That's not about homeownership. It is, and it's – my wife is kind of a good child, and so she's always been scared to not do what her mom says. She's gotten a whole lot better. She's come a long way. I'm really proud of her. How does your mother-in-law even know the things that are going on? in your house. Is your wife telling her? Is your wife talking to her about things that they shouldn't be talking about? She's not said a whole lot, but she does tell her some things.

1:29:38And early on in our marriage, she told her too much. She's quit doing that. Good. Okay, she needs to be the one that tells her mom, hey, mom, thank you for the wisdom and the advice, but me and my husband got this. Yeah, and I guess one of the questions, And part of the problem is I told my wife, look, we're going to have to draw some lines in the sand with your mom. And there's going to have to, if she crosses those, there's going to have to be consequences. Wait, wait, why? Why don't you just let her mom say what she's going to say and you'll go on about your lives? Yeah. What's a consequence in your mind?

1:30:11Well, it's, she's, I honestly don't know at the moment. It's just that she's caused conflict between my wife and I over this. Okay, but your mother-in-law is becoming a proxy war for the real issue, which is, are you and your wife aligned on how y 'all want to do your life? We are. Honestly, the longer we've been married, the more aligned we are. Okay, I want y 'all to recenter back on that. My dad and I see differences in politics. We see differences in economics. We see differences all over the place. And so when I'm around him, you know what he does? He does what a dad should do, which is he tries to tell me what I need to know.

1:30:50right and and i get to decide i'm cutting you off or i can listen and there there's been some some some wisdom in some of the stuff he's told me over the years in fact there's been a ton of wisdom and a lot of it i go that's great man as for you and your house you and my mom y 'all get to do that but me and my house me and my wife we're gonna do something different it's great right right and if she's actively trying to divide you and your wife that's the real issue is that your wife has to put her foot down on that because that's her mom. Right. And if she won't, then you and your wife have an issue, not you and your mother-in-law.

1:31:27And, you know, we've come along, like I said, we don't really have near as much of an issue anymore. I mean, my wife is... Oh, whoops. Go ahead, brother. Sorry, man. No, it's all right. My wife is kind of common to her own quite a bit. She was very scared to make her mom mad when we first got married. She's no longer that way. Sure, and that's common. That's common. So it's gotten better, but something is – even though it's gotten better, you're still pushed to the point of calling a radio show. Yeah, your mother-in-law can't force you to do anything legally, morally, ethically, spiritually. You can't feel forced, right?

1:32:02You can just hang up the phone. Right. Fair enough. I think that's the place to – I think that's where we need to start. We're working on life goals, and we're going to homeschool our son. And I mean, we're very old school, traditional Christians, conservatives. And great. I mean, it only matters if you and your wife are aligned on this. And then when you all get aligned on it, then you all decide together who gets a vote. Right. And my position is if you're not paying the bills, you don't get a vote. What does that mean? Well, if you're not part of our household, I should clarify that because my wife stays home with my son.

1:32:42That's what I was thinking. okay okay she clearly gets what i mean because she's working regardless well listen and for whatever it's worth i've got other men and women in my life who don't pay my bills that i've given permission to speak into my life if they see me acting in a way or saying things that they're like hey that's not you or you're about to do something stupid with your money like i've given them permission i'm not just gonna like lone ranger this thing that's how people like just ride their horse off the cliff but all i have to say is you can't do that until you and your wife for aligned on who we are going to be.

1:33:16That's good advice. I mean, our pastor's been a great help to us, and I've been forever grateful for his wisdom. I've been grateful for you guys' wisdom because following the baby steps, I'm really loving it. Well, that's awesome. But I think personally, and Dave and I have talked about this over dinner before multiple times, I think the magic of the baby steps is in married couples, it's a way to force alignment or ways to not force alignment but to force discussions about alignment and when a couple gets aligned there's just no stopping them but if one of y 'all is all aligned on your values and you're dragging somebody else along on these baby steps and their mother keeps calling to pull you off and it becomes even a conversation that tells me you and your wife aren't fully aligned on where are we going and who are we going to be and then who gets a vote into the steps we're taking you give me some things to think about is that fair and no it's very fair you give me some things to think about actually it's can i tell you a way to do this because i have a feeling you're going to go home and tell your wife you're not aligned with me and that would be the wrong way no no not at all not at all absolutely here's what i want you to do.

1:34:37I want you, not her, I want you to call somebody to watch your son for about three or four hours one Saturday morning. You set it up. And then you take your wife and say, I want us to have a dreaming retreat. We're into this baby steps thing. We're paying off our debts, but we started sprinting before we really counted the cost of how far we're going to run here. Who do we want to be? And y 'all dream about what you want your house to look like, what town you want to live in as a part of that, we're going to dream about who gets a vote in our life. And y 'all come away from that retreat totally unified.

1:35:16You get what I'm saying? I do. I love it. My wife will love that too. Awesome. Excellent, my brother. Deciding the identity first. I'm going to be the kind of person who takes care of themselves. I'm going to be the kind of person who doesn't borrow money. Then I'm going to reverse engineer goals and steps that allow me to get to that identity, not just take off sprinting to follow the next goal, right? If you chase an identity with action, you'll get there.

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1:36:48Hey, Catherine, what's up? What's going on? Hi, I am a single mom and my child support ended abruptly last month. And I'm just had, I have a mortgage and I have$77 ,000 in a HELOC that I just opened. And I'm just trying to figure out how to get everything paid, the debt and everything. It's just very overwhelming. I knew my child support would end probably June. I was looking for part-time jobs to compensate for the loss. But this was just very unexpected, and I just have a lot of stress. How much was it? The child support was$900 a month. That was a big amount. For one kid or two? It was for two.

1:37:50Two. However, he didn't end it when my son turned 18. And I don't know why. The judge or your the judge or your ex? The ex-husband. What's what's the court order? Until they're 18. OK, so can you fight this if he is choosing not too early? Like what's the what's the situation surrounding him not paying until 18? I don't know. His current wife does not allow him to talk to me. My guess is he kept paying on your other child and there was a net dollar amount.

1:38:30Yeah, possibly. And once he crossed that net dollar amount threshold, it stopped. Okay. That'd be my guess. Have you contacted an attorney? I actually went to the child support office building, and they said because she's still in high school under Maryland law, he cannot just cut the child support. So I had to get an official document from the school and provide it. But for right now, I'm out that extra$900 a month with all these other bills coming in. Okay. I have a feeling, don't get me wrong. he should pay for the kids. But I have a feeling there's a lot more that's part of this equation that's making this even tougher.

1:39:18You mentioned a$77 ,000 HELOC. Can you tell me a little bit more about your personal finance, what you're earning, how old the kids are, all of that stuff? Yeah, sure. My kids are 18 and 24. Only the 18-year-old lives at home. I own my house. I owe$200 in the first mortgage and$77 on the HELOC. I have a$10 ,000 personal loan I'm paying on. I have a car payment. I owe, I think,$20 ,000 still on my car. I do have$4 ,700 in savings, so that's good. What do you do for a living? I am a CNA, certified nursing assistant. Okay. What does that bring you in every month? About$3 ,200. Okay. And how much is your mortgage again?

1:40:17My mortgage is$1 ,291. Okay. Plus the HELOC. Yeah. Then the HELOC is$490. Ooh, mama. That's what's getting you. Why did you take out a$77 ,000 HELOC? Um, because I had a credit card debt and the minimum payments were getting up to like 300 to 350 a month. So you traded 350 a month for 490 a month? Um, well that, I mean, that was just one credit card. Okay. So overall it was like almost a thousand dollars in minimum payments. Okay. So we can't, we can't really go back, but the logic there was flawed. is what John is trying to tell you. Because now we're paying$1 ,800 a month to live where we were once paying$1 ,291, and it was way more reasonable with your income.

1:41:14Whew, girly. I think that you put yourself in a really tough spot because this is now your home that's on the line, and it is now half of your income, more than half of your income. So for that reason, unless you see your income going up drastically here soon, you put your house on the line because your mortgage can't be 50 % of your take-home pay. How much equity do you have in this house? I have 95 ,000. So you barely have enough to even clear the HELOC.

1:41:54Sheesh. Okay. Here's the options. I'm going to just shoot you straight. option one is you figure out a way to increase your income drastically because here's the thing your child's 18 even if the child support lasted until june it was still gonna go away which means by june you still would have been in the same situation with your income uh so while i wish that you were still getting that money in the grand scheme of it it's kind of neither here nor there. It was buying you a little bit of time here. So unless we can figure out a path to get your income up very, very much, you might have to sell this house.

1:42:35And when you would sell it, what you would do is pay off the$77 ,000 HELOC and maybe have a little bit left to clear out some of this personal loan, possibly all of it. It just depends on what the fees are. And then what you could turn around and do is sell your car and use the 4 ,700 you have saved and buy a cash beater and you're completely square. And you're debt free. You're debt free, but you're starting from scratch and you're rebuilding something really new and something really awesome. And I just told you a lot. I just wrecked. I just, I realized what I did and I don't expect you to go, okay.

1:43:15I expect you to go home and. Sob. Yeah. It's hard. Yeah. But I mean, when was the divorce? Oh, 2010. Okay. It sounds like there's been some sort of, I don't want to say punting, but some sort of kind of bending around reality that over the last, what, 16 years, you've racked up$75 ,000 in credit cards. bought a car you couldn't afford tried to keep this house together for the kids you get what I'm saying like I get it and man I talk to so many folks who've been divorced and are trying to hang on to what was and trying to give the kids a good life all that stuff is admirable and noble but you just reached a line where like the math isn't working for you anymore you have a big math problem

1:44:11yeah are you working full time yes Okay. Yeah, I guess the other option, like Jade said, is you just try to hang on to everything and you decide for the next three to five years, you're going to work every overtime shift. You're going to work Saturdays, Sundays, and you're just going to live that life. and that's going to be that's a very tough life sustainability wise because even if you clear out all this debt then you would be tackling the mortgage and you're still at 50 percent so the margin that you have to put towards this debt i mean you'd have to go crazy uh with overtime and you'd have to do it for quite a while so just putting that putting that out there if you're up for it, more power to you.

1:44:58But it's a journey. Right. I understand. I hate this for you. It is what it is. I think. Have you sat down with your kids and just kind of been honest about here's my financial position? Yes. I mean, the one that lives with me, yes. Sure. Okay. Yeah, I mean, that you go ahead i was gonna say there's part of it it's a perspective thing obviously i've the suggestions i gave are neither fun but there's part of that i kind of like the idea of a fresh start i love that could be really a great adventure for you um and scary but also really really great the the debt is gone the mistakes are gone the kids are gone and you're just now out here living your best life.

1:45:52That's pretty awesome. Well, and I can say my wife and I did very similar. We sold the house, sold stuff, moved into a dorm. You've made similar sacrifices. And it looked at the time to my friends and community were crazy. And, but it was a path to freedom. And it was the fastest path I could get to. And at that point I was more interested in how fast do I, what's the, what's the fastest way to get to between two lines, right? I'm just going to fly. And it's not taking a step backwards. It's taking many, many steps very quickly forward. To get to service. Yeah. Yeah. So it's a tough pill to swallow, but that's the mathematical reality.

1:46:39Welcome to 2026. Last year is officially in the rear view and you're fired up to finally make some changes with your money. New year, new goals. We love it. But let's be honest, old you said the exact same thing last January and the January before that. And before you know it, those money goals fizzle out faster than the fleeting flavor of LaCroix. So here's the truth. New year motivation only gets you so far. You need an actual plan. And the good news is you don't have to figure it out on your own. Every dollar builds a personalized plan based on your goals and your real life. and it actually coaches you to stick with it.

1:47:12Plus, the EveryDollar app will help you find extra money hiding in your budget. And trust me, there's always something hiding. The average person finds$3 ,015 in the first 15 minutes. That's basically like giving yourself a raise and a much happier New Year. So don't let future you down. Make them proud. Go download the EveryDollar budget app and start for free right now.

1:47:43Everyone needs insurance, but it can be hard trying to find pros who aren't just looking to make a buck. And it's hard to find agents who know what they're talking about. Ramsey Trusted Insurance Pros are vetted and coached to make sure they're market experts who have your best interests at heart. Go to RamseySolutions.com slash coverage to find the type of insurance you're looking for and connect with a Ramsey Trusted Agent. Let's go out to Phoenix and talk to Bridget. Hey, Bridget, what's up? Hello. Thank you for taking my call. Of course. Thanks for calling. How can we help? I'm wondering how I should go about paying for a new AC unit for our house.

1:48:23We don't have any cash to pay for it. All righty. Tell us what money you do have. What are you earning every single month? My husband makes$5 ,939 a month after taxes before insurance. Okay. I am a stay-at-home mom. Okay. And there's zero money saved is what you said. We have$1 ,800. $1 ,800? Yes. Okay. What's it going to cost to get the new AC? uh we got two opinions um one smaller business guy said it was going to cost about ten thousand dollars and then a more well-known business in our area said it would be about fifteen thousand but that they could offer rebates that could get us down to about twelve okay um but i've heard i'm sorry i've heard that the rebates can be difficult to get sure so is it completely out?

1:49:29Is it completely dead? You're sitting there in the cold? It's not completely dead. It's our air conditioning unit. Is there a possibility you can let it ride for three months since we're in the middle of winter? There is a possibility, yes. But of course, in Phoenix in the summer, demand gets a little bit higher. The prices of things go up. We wanted to get ahead of it. If we could before it got hot and we need to turn it on. I get that. You just don't have the money for it. Yes. Yeah. But there could be time to save money and get it done before June or before May hits. I am currently using the EveryDollar app and I am in the red.

1:50:18I have only used the EveryDollar app this month. Prior to that, I was budgeting in a book for about six months and I wasn't really getting anywhere. Okay. Tell me about being in the red. What are you seeing that is the issue? We have a car payment and credit card debt, a little bit of medical debt, and a little bit of a private student loan. Okay. Right now, are you... Altogether, it's about$1 ,400 in debt a month. That's minimums? Yeah, that's all minimums. Okay. And then how much is your mortgage? Or your rent or whatever? $1 ,100, but my husband pays an extra$100 on that. Okay, so that's definitely not the problem.

1:51:07So we've got about$2 ,500 here. Tell me where else is the problem because we've got a great mortgage. We've got minimums covered. Where is the other$2 ,600 going? We're spending about$850 on groceries a month. There's six of us, two adults, four children. Yep, great. Two of them are teenagers. One of them is in elementary school. Yeah, I think that's great. So now we're down to$1 ,800.

1:51:41Do you see what I'm doing here? I'm trying to pinpoint the issue. There's something here. Do you have daycare? No daycare. Okay. There's something here that's eaten your lunch. You'll be able to see it in every dollar. but right now you're kind of in a point of a little beyond four walls. It's like, okay, I've got to make sure I'm paying the minimums on everything. Obviously I'd keep food on the table. Obviously I keep the mortgage covered. We just covered that unless there's some medical thing or a lot of insurance that I don't know about. Uh, my goal right now would be a little bit of a storm mode and I'm not trying to pay anything extra.

1:52:16I'm just trying to figure out what's putting me in the red. And is it something that I can tweak and change? Because we have a countdown clock that's set for like May 1st that we've got to get to. So not only do I have to figure out what's putting us in the red, now the next thing is, okay, where can we bring in more money? Is it something that you can pick up work? Is it something that your husband can pick up work? Let's take some time and brainstorm that out. Yeah, we are spending about$820 a month in insurance premiums. Okay. And my husband, he is a an executive sous chef. He works from 8am to 10pm, five to six days a week.

1:52:57He could not pick up anything I could try to do something. Previously, my job, I was cooking as well. And now I just I have to have the flexibility to drop off all the kids at school and pick up all the kids. How many kids? That's really four. Four of them are in school. And I have my four-year-old at home. Four-year-olds at home. Going to go to school soon for kindergarten, I'm guessing. So back to the budget, I'm still having$980 that I'm seeing that's unaccounted for. And it's probably going here or there. But that's what I want. I want you to get to the point, and you got to, of what is necessity.

1:53:36Because you guys are in a necessity mode of it. It ain't a necessity clocking it out of the budget. Because you can't afford it. You need whatever money you can find that you're going to add together with this$1 ,800 that you already have saved to start to be able to get closer to this$10 ,000 mark. So it's reverse engineering this math and saying, okay, what do we need to bring in to get$10 ,000, really another$8 ,000 by May? And that's the math problem. And here's the other reality. If you went out today and borrowed$10 ,000 to put this in, according to your budget that you've done on every dollar, you wouldn't be able to make that minimum payment.

1:54:15Oh, yeah. You'd be now$500 more in the red. Yeah. And so I would draw a really firm line and say we're not going to borrow money. What must be true? And by the way, your husband works like crazy. Kudos to him. it might be for three months for his family he's got to get up on sundays and go do go throw boxes somewhere okay or get up in the morning after sleeping for a few hours and go i don't know what else but maybe it's in the cars tell me about your cars can you sell that car with a car payment we have well we have one four like five seater car that is what he takes to work uh that's paid off.

1:54:57And then the one that fits all of us is the one we make the car payment on. That's$686 a month. What's the total amount you owe on it? $21 ,000. Okay. Do you know what it's worth? Kelly Blue booked it this morning, private party. It was sitting at around$24 ,000. Okay. What about the five-seater? What's that worth? um that i have had for a lot of years it's a 2011 40 probably only worth two thousand dollars okay um i think john's right i think there's going to be some strong discomfort that's going to take place here in the next couple of months but it's going to be for a great gain because to your point you couldn't afford a debt payment even if you wanted to Yeah, the one AC company, the bigger company said that they had a like 18 month 0 % interest financing option, but the smaller, the smaller company doesn't do financing at all.

1:55:59Here's what I want you to do. It's still a payment. It doesn't matter if there's nothing gaining on it. It's still a payment. What I want you to do, I want you to swap where your brain power is going. Because right now your brain power is going on what types of payment plans they're offering, what types of debt there could be. what types, right? I want you to switch all that power and go to, okay, what can I do? What can I offer myself? What can my husband offer our family in terms of work? What can I, do you see what I'm saying? Just shift all that over because John is right. If you don't take debt off the table, I guarantee you're going to do it.

1:56:36And by the way, if many of those programs that are 18 months, no interest, if you don't pay it off in 18 months, all of that back interest is added to the loan. yes and so um i do have i'm sorry go ahead no you go ahead um we are getting ten thousand dollars in taxes back this year i did a like a mock okay online great um should we use that to do it otherwise my husband wanted to open a heat lock what don't put your house on the block you have four kids please don't put your house on the block okay yes no use what girl you should have told us that from the beginning now yes i'm sorry that money use that okay all right we'll do that but not not a penny more okay don't borrow money understood okay yeah we're we're trying not to absolutely

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1:58:23Today's scripture of the day is Hebrews 10, 35 through 36. So do not throw away your confidence. It will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you've done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised. Y 'all don't know this, but producer James Child, is one of the hugest Limp Bizkit fans of all time and in honor of him today's quote is from one of his heroes, Fred Durst Fred Durst says, to walk around with an ego is a bad thing to have confidence in yourself is a great thing. Shout out Fred and shout out James the biggest Limp Bizkit fan I know. Let's go out to Detroit Michigan and talk to Zane Hey Zane, what's up man?

1:59:09How you doing? We're doing all right, brother. What's up with you? So, just a little back story. I was an athlete. So, I left school to pursue a job that I thought was going to be my career. It turned out it wasn't for me. And I got into a little accident. And I'm 24 right now. And I got a$1.2 million case settlement. I don't have much debt. Not many expenses. I'm not working anymore. I'm kind of just floating around. I don't have a place to really stay, so I'm kind of just staying in my car for a while. The first check is supposed to be over six years. The first check is coming in a couple of days, and I'm not really sure what to do with it.

1:59:59How much will it be? $1.2 million. The first check. I thought you said the$1.2 million is over six years. Yeah,$200 ,000 for six years. okay 200 ,000 it just okay wow okay so tell me more about tell me more about what you were doing tell me more about why you don't have anyone around you and why you're kind of living in your in your car yeah I was I was living with my girlfriend um and then I lost my job I mean I I was an accountant, and I just didn't enjoy it. So I left that, and I guess I just... You left it with no other job? Yeah, yeah. I mean, I found out about the case, and I kind of just walked out.

2:00:47Bad decision by me. I drove down to Phoenix. It just also wasn't for me. So now I'm back in Detroit. I have actually a job interview coming up in a couple days, too. So I'm going to take that more seriously. I just don't know where to start. Do I get a house? Okay. How are you feeling? Are you feeling great or are you feeling like a little down in the dumps? Well, I'm scared. I mean, I have no idea what I'm doing, what my purpose is, where I'm going in life. And then all of a sudden I get a big sum of money. Yeah. Sometimes the sum of money is like the legal, the way they say this legally is to make you whole.

2:01:29Are you going to have ongoing medical procedures or issues down the road? No. Okay. So they just wrote you a check that said, basically, it's like, our bad, here you go? Yep. Okay. Wow, okay. And how old are you, man? 24. You said you were an athlete for a while. Tell me about that. I played soccer at Purdue. Okay. And then I left that. I went to Detroit Mercy. And then I had a pretty good job at Big Boy, the restaurant corporate. and I was doing pretty well. I was doing the accounting for them, but I was just bored out of my mind. Okay. So I think, man, if I'm totally honest with you, the chances of this money, you look up in six years and you're right where you are right now, statistically speaking, is very high.

2:02:19So I want to applaud you. I'd hug you if you were standing in front of me. I want to applaud you for reaching out to get wisdom. like it takes a lot of wisdom to say hey I've screwed up I was an athlete my whole life and I've been floundering with who I am now that I don't have that kind of structure I thought I want to do this corporate thing that wasn't for me I screwed that up too like you're wise beyond your years so I want to applaud you okay thank you but I also hear that I'm not saying this as a diagnosis but I hear that underlying I don't say depression but dude you're just running low right now and i'm just trying yeah i i think you're worth sitting calling somebody in the local detroit area and don't tell any of your bodies you don't have to run your mouth about it but just go sit down with a counselor and say hey i just want to talk through some stuff because it sounds like you're carrying a lot of weight you

2:03:18Yeah, and I'm just not really sure what the next step is with my life, I guess. Yeah, I think this money hit at a time where there's honestly more important things to deal with. If I were you, just really quickly, because I want John to talk more about this, but if you have a little bit of debt, go ahead and pay it off with this$200 ,000. You got to get yourself an apartment. This is not the time to think about buying a house or anything. Please don't buy a house. Yeah. Just get yourself an apartment near where you do life and keep it modest and then just park the rest of it in a high yield savings for right now.

2:03:54The next check for$200 ,000, when will you receive that? Next year, February. Okay. So that's great. You're not receiving this. Oh boy. You're receiving a lot of money, but it could be worse. If you were getting huge chunks, it could be a lot of damage done. But with this$200 ,000, treat it like, for now, treat it like this is the money that you live off for the entire year, basically. Until you can figure out what your life is. And John's going to help with that. And I love you going to get a job. I think you having something to wake up and go to every day, even if it's boring, is a really good exercise for you right now.

2:04:32I would put a cap. This is just me. This is old me talking to 24-year-old me. I would put a cap and say I'm going to buy a car for$20 ,000 or less. Okay. because you're going to want to go out. You're going to have$200 ,000 and you're going to want to go out. You're going to ask a couple of your buddies and you're going to end up with a $90 ,000 car that will depreciate, you know, off a cliff. Right. But if you go buy a$20 ,000 car, you get yourself a two bedroom apartment. That's nice. Right. And then you park the rest of that money, like Jade said, and you go get a job and you go talk to a counselor and start squaring up.

2:05:05Who am I going to be? What kind of man do I want to become over time? And what steps do I need to take to do that? Do I need to go back to school? Do I need to go learn a trade? Who do I want to become? And I think you've got to dig into some of those answers. At the same time, you're living life. You're working a job. You're going out. You're meeting friends. You're dating again. You're living this life. And what you'll have that most people don't is a$175 ,000 cushion in a high-yield savings account that nobody knows about. Right. Right. And I'll give you one better because I don't want to be a complete buzzkill on the fact that you've got a little bit of money coming in here.

2:05:42Once you secure a job and it's the job that you think you're going to work for a while, you can take, let's say you secure a job, you're making, I don't know,$120 ,000 a year. Then you can say, I'm going to take 60 ,000 and I'm going to buy myself a car in cash. Yes. Okay. You know what I'm saying? And that way you've done the fun thing. But for the most part, this is your legacy money. like you can blow 1.2 million in a hot second you can blow 200 000 a year in a hot second if you're not smart with it so and everyone around you listen to me everyone around you is going to tell you to buy a house buy a car or two to always pick up the tab when y 'all go out to a restaurant to buy crypto to they're gonna everyone's gonna have an opinion if i got a job if you get a job and you qualify for it i'd go i'd just go ahead and fill up your Roth IRA for the year.

2:06:31I mean, you can do some really smart stuff. You can sit down with a smart investor pro too, but I would put that money in a high yield savings account and start to square up the question, who am I going to be? What kind of man am I going to be? And because you have found yourself alone right now, I want you to go sit down with a professional. I have done it and it made tremendous difference in my life. And many of the men that I trust have gone to sit with a counselor too. I just think that's where you're at right now, brother, because I can hear your voice. yeah it's a blessing but it's also scary yeah it's awesome but you're the fact that your first thought was i'm going to reach out and talk to a coach first tells me that you're wise you're wise beyond your years brother so i applaud you thank you there's nobody better i've been listening to you guys for a while now that's awesome will you make will you make jay and i a commitment yes you'll by march one you'll be debt free you'll have yourself a nice but not crazy car and you'll have yourself an apartment yeah i promise and you promise you'll have the rest of that in the high yield savings account and you won't tell any of your other friends this money's coming i promise excellent now you're on the path brother proud of you dude um jade i don't want to say i'm proud that he got in a wreck and got money or got an accident but he's okay so that's good Yeah, I'm glad he's okay, and I'm glad that he's wise and said, okay, my life just changed, and I don't think I've got the mental or emotional capacity for it and reach out for help.

2:07:53That's right. It's good. If you need to talk to somebody, go talk to somebody. Love you guys. Bye.