‘Do I Need Permission to Have a Baby?’ - The Untold Struggles of Female Athletes

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1:21Rach:Welcome to Daily Brightness, the Q &A episode, the one we love. Let's get straight into it. First question is actually from somebody called Rachel. Shout out to you. What name? We've already touched on this, but it is something that we're both really passionate about. So at the weekend, we saw Hannah Blundell make a return to Manchester United after having her daughter. How impressive was that? and what are the challenges of wanting to be a professional female footballer as well as a mother? Is that spoken about at clubs? Right. I think we're both really passionate about this. I think more can be done.

1:50Rach:100%. I think it's still taboo. I know 100 % because there's players that have had babies at Chelsea. But when we speak on these topics, me and Rach, we don't just speak about our situation. We speak about women's football as a collective. And I still think it's taboo. I still think females still have to ask themselves, oh would the club mind if I had a baby like that's not even a question you're a woman you don't have to ask for permission to have a baby no you have a baby you have a baby and do you know what I think would be a really good shout I don't know if anyone's done it but I like clubs could partner with Fertility Clinic they could give education on it though they could give all sorts like as females you don't know what your options are no and I don't think you know your rights and what you're allowed No, and I do think each club is different, but I do think it should be known.

2:44Rach:What happens when you have a baby as a female in football? What actually happens? Because I know in my environment I'd be taken care of, but that doesn't list it for everyone else. I feel like there should be a non-negotiable of what happens if you're having a baby. No, and it's one of those things as well. It shouldn't be taboo. If I went to training ground tomorrow and somebody came in and said they were pregnant, it should be celebrated. It shouldn't be seen as a negative. But what about the lead up to being pregnant? We all jump to being pregnant, but what if you need IVF? What if you need support?

3:15Rach:What if you're at the stage of you're thinking about wanting a baby or you're wanting to look into your options? It's the start to finish process of having a baby. It's not just simple. You don't just have a kid. You don't just go, oh, I'm pregnant. It's getting pregnant. I think it should be known. I don't think it should be taboo. I personally think like our clubs like medical support is, is really good in that, in that environment in terms of, you know, we have a male doctor, a female doctor, like they're both really, really amazing people, amazing doctors. And I think that they're really, really like supportive.

3:47Rach:But I think about things like fertility clinics, right? Like as you get older, like you want to know where you're at. Like you don't want to know, you know, everyone's situation is different. Like you said, some people might be going through it in a same sex situation, even if you're not in a same sex relationship, like who's to say that you know that you're able to get pregnant like that's something that i think could be looked at to be provided by clubs you know i think like we have like smear tests and we have things like that and there's things that we're champion and things that we want to fight for but i do think it's a narrative that you go down that like it's nothing to do with male football it's nothing to do with the men like it's something so different i know this is slightly different but like we had a conversation at villa and i think that are really really good at support women in in terms of medical situations and i i like a few of us voiced that like smear tests should be at club we shouldn't have to go outside the club to get a smear test or to get female checks where i know that male clubs they get their prostate checked do you get smear tests at your club so we do now so like we we didn't yeah we we've always had it at chelsea to be fair it's one thing i can vouch for yeah we didn't but it was now i think there was things like like insurance and this, that and the other.

4:58Rach:And obviously there's protocols that you've got to follow, but I think people are really good at like being receptive and listening to your feedback and like what you need. Because I think sometimes, again, because things like that are so taboo, people are actually a bit scared to go and do stuff like that. People are scared to go to a fertility clinic. People are scared to do that. Like, and I think that it should be a norm. Well, you're scared to even ask that question because then it's like, oh my God, do the club think I'm having a baby? Am I going to be released? Am I going to get another contract?

5:24Rach:Am I going to get this? like that shouldn't even be in your thought. If you were in another line of work, you wouldn't think, oh shit, I can't mention that I want to have a baby in the next couple of years because I'm going to get signed off, I'm going to get released. No, it's the same. It doesn't matter if you're a professional athlete, you're working in an office, you work at McDonald's or wherever you work, like it doesn't matter. It's a part of life. It's part of life. It's natural life. And it should be celebrated. As a woman, I see it as that's the gift that you were given. You were given a gift to produce life.

5:54Rach:So it's like, it shouldn't be like frowned upon. So I definitely think more could be done. However, I will say like, I do feel like I'm in a very safe environment where if I needed anything, I could go and ask for it and I would be looked after. But what I would like to change is not having to ask and it being known that I could go and freeze mags if I wanted to. I could start my journey to having a baby. Yeah, like, is there a direct link that we can do that? Is there like routes that you can go down? But yeah, I'm in the same sort of position as you. I think our doctors and medical team at Villa and really supportive and things like that so I'm very grateful for them for that shout out to Hannah again we can shout her name from the rooftops because yeah good for you you've got a gorgeous little girl and I do think there's several footballers that have now made it it's becoming like oh look they've had a baby and then gone back and played at the top level and I think that should happen more and more but I think equally had she not have played whatever you want to do like you know giving birth to a new life changes your life do you know what I mean like it has demands like people's pregnancies aren't straightforward you don't know what people are going through and i think yeah i think things like that are it's really hard to to go back to the top of the game after having a baby so i think yeah massive credit where credit's due definitely hannah and your beautiful little girl good question though right moving on uh lils is it too early to start listening to christmas songs no absolutely not you know what i might tomorrow on my way to work i might pop a pop a little bit of mariah carey on i put heart christmas on yesterday yeah I think I'm going to start it makes me happy what's your favourite Christmas song I would say oh Last Christmas last Christmas I've just been singing that did you know my name but the very next day you gave it away but I'm a bit like annoyed by that song because Leeds fans used to sing it well I don't know if they still I don't know they changed the play that they sing it to so now every time I sing it my dad did it once we went out at Christmas one year and we had a player called Pontus Janssen so they'd go we'd give it to Pontus Janssen like that was like a a chant and so now I can't go the very next day you gave it away this year to save me from I never say give it to someone special anymore and then after that he went we'll give it to Patrick Bamford aww so it's like that's a cute memory so I can't sing it as a non-football chant anymore but that is my favourite Of course we like the favourite Christmas song.

8:23Rach:But it's not too early. Halloween's done. Get your Christmas tunes on. I agree. Millie, this question's for you. How did you fall in love with horses? I mean, I know, but... Oh, God, horses is all I've ever known. I started riding. I had my first pony when I was one. I could ride my little pony. My little pony. I could ride my little Shetland fidget. It was my best friend. I was riding when I was one. So it's literally all I've ever known. Me and my mom, both my sisters, Tori and Amy, we used to do like, yeah, we all used to like go riding together and that was like our little thing. So honestly, since, yeah, since I've been one, but then it was just like my passion and it was every day.

9:05Rach:And then the horses for me became therapy. Like being at the field, it's just like ultimate freedom. Like no one bugs me, put my phone down. Freedom! I love going back. Freedom! I love going back and visiting my mum and dad's. and yeah I went back obviously recently and just been back there is like bliss I cannot wait to have that every day when I retire moving on what's your go-to karaoke song on a team night out well forget team night out just do any night out what's your go-to mine's Lady Marmalade you're so good at that I feel like everyone's got one song that they can nail and that is you that will that will forever remind me of the World Cup in New Zealand me you and Zell are morangatangs morangatangs we used to call ourselves but listen I can belt that out and to anyone listening you are really good at that we are going to have a little karaoke session on our little podcast one night we're going to bring your favourite drink and we're going to get the karaoke out karaoke machine out I've got little microphones actually but Lady Marmalade yeah you're really good at that you are really good at that like you hit that note and I was like I remember the first time we did it and I was like holy shit Millie can sing I don't know where did that come from but what's yours everyone would say River Deep wouldn't they but I wouldn't I wouldn't do it now it's like overkill I do you know what I'm listen I can toot my own horn with this one Sinead O 'Connor nothing compares to you I thought you was going to say oh do you know what else we used to love singing before he cheats what's she called oh Carrie Underwood I dug my key into the side of his pretty little...

10:50Rach:Anastasia, Left Outside Alone. I can bang that out. Left Outside Alone. You liked that, the angry woman, didn't you? I'm an angry woman. What can I say? Kicking to the side of his pretty little soup to fall. Oh, yeah, we're doing drag. Carved my name into his leather suit. cute anyway we are doing karaoke that song is a visual representation of you and how you love your life anyone crosses you like cut the car cut the car bash the windows with a baseball bat slash your tires I'm quite angry at times aren't I I think I need anger management I'm really nice though I am a really nice person I actually reckon Carrie Underwood is like an accurate representation of how you would act yeah don't piss me off then it's quite simple that song that song is literally your like theme song your soundtrack to life no dog my key and I can literally see you without your keys like don't crush me yeah literally I have one rule in life don't piss me off it's very simple that's it that's it it's one rule what a fantastic song yeah but I do like Anastasia left a sad loom that song will remind me right i can't tell you the story but that song literally reminds me so much of jordan knobs and it will only ever remind me of her now and the story that comes with that but so funny in it how songs do that to you yeah i love it i have certain songs that i'm like if i'm if i'm in a mood i'll put it on like lady marmalade i'm in a really good mood i'm blasting it i'm feeling myself that's a good one though it's a bit more of an upbeat one but hey i'll I'll send you a video of STMV singing that Sinead O 'Connor one.

12:38Rach:I nailed it. Yeah, please. I was like, record me, record me. Anyway, good question. Love that. Do you wet your toothbrush before you brush your teeth? Yeah. If you don't, what are you doing? Just brushing dry toothpaste. It's like saying, do you put water in a cement mixer? Yeah. No, I just slap it on and open that. I just slap all dusty bit on and hope it sticks together. That's a weird one, that is. Oh, that might be a bit of an ick, you know, if I know people that don't wet the toothbrush before they put it in their mouth with toothpaste on. Yeah, that's gross. That feels like you just need to rub in sandpaper on your teeth.

13:13Rach:Also, off topic, but you know when you take a paracetamol? Yeah. How do you do it? Talk me through the whole process. First of all, I get anxiety that I'm going to choke. Second, I go and get a cup of water. Then I put water in my mouth. Then I'll drop the paracetamol in. Yeah, same. Same. But I can't. I don't want that powdery towel. No. It sticks to the back of the ear. I can't understand how people just get like a pill, put it in the mouth and then wash it down. I'm like, like the taste. People that do that, you must have a lot of saliva in your mouth. That's icky. I could not. That's a red flag.

13:47Rach:I never understand why people do that. Water, drop it in a nice gut. Yeah. Do you know what makes it worse? If you do that, but then you swallow, but you don't swallow the pill and it's still there. I'm like. Yeah, but you've got to have enough war in. I have actually tried before to do a paracetamol. I think when I was younger, when with no water, and it was just sticking to my throat, I was like, horrible. Let's start gipping. No. Right, quick break. We'll be back with some more questions. Great questions to start with. We love that. So we'll be back in a little jiffy. Hi, this is Gary Lineker from Goalhangers.

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16:51Rach:Welcome back, everybody. We are straight back into the second part. I think so far, Rach, I don't know about you, but these are my favorite set of questions. I actually agree. I feel like I can really like branch out. I'm getting really into it. Like I'm getting excited. Like now I want to go and sing. I want to go and like just test if my way of taking paracetamol works. No, I'm literally going to carry okay. Taking paracetamol while brushing my teeth. Right, let's get back into it. Oh, good one. What time is appropriate to eat a Christmas dinner on Christmas Day? Well, I have a very strict routine, so.

17:21Rach:Do you? What is it then? Talk me through it before I go into mine. I will sway a little bit, but obviously growing up, we had a really rigid thing. We had to go to the horses, get the horses done first thing, come back, we'd do all the presents. Then we'd have, mum had this ritual of like, we all had breakfast together, but then like my nan and granddad had come down. sometimes aunties and uncles would come like that was our routine and then we'd do everyone else's presents like run around all the other families then me, my dad and my sisters would go to the pub mum would go to my nan's they'd cook the dinner and we'd come back and we used to eat about three now obviously we're a bit older we're all living in different places the schedule's changed but we still eat like even if I have dinner at mine dinner still is at like three it's still afternoon yeah see okay so over the years mine's changed a lot so obviously when i was younger we would always do christmas eve with my mom wake up on christmas day with my mom do presents with my mom everything have christmas day with her and her dinner would be about one o 'clock i would have lunch christmas lunch with my mom and my family my mom's family at one then i'd go to my dad's and then theirs would be like four four or five o 'clock yeah and then i'd have another one it's fine yeah so that That was kind of like my Christmas days growing up.

18:35Rach:But now I've got a big thing on this. Christmas dinner, overrated or not? Depends what you put on it. It's a glorified Sunday dinner, right? And it makes everybody so stressed. Who does the cooking in your house, your mum or your dad? Used to be mum when I was little, but now it's dad. But then it would be me a lot. Right. How stressed do people get? It is stressful. Cooking for a lot of people. It is stressful. Getting the timings right. It's stressful. It ruins their Christmas day. Yeah. Like you've got the kids playing, you're missing out on them doing that. You've got the turkey and you need to get the roasties at the right time.

19:11Rach:Everything's a stress, not to mention the washing up. And by the time that the food's actually on the table, the person who cooks never wants to eat. Yeah. So for me, it's like, right, take the stress away. Don't have one. So now this is a big thing. And I know people will be like, what do you mean you don't have a Christmas dinner? We had one two years ago. Guess what we said? We turned around and said, what should we do this Christmas? We didn't go anywhere. We didn't go to any family. It's like, we did all the family stuff like on the lead up to Christmas. Yeah. And I went, we went, I want a kid's tea.

19:41Rach:So we made, this was a one year Christmas dinner, turkey dinosaurs, smiley faces, peas. I can't remember what else. A couple of other bits. In a giant Yorkshire pudding gravy, right? Honestly. It was amazing. It was in and out, done, put away, onto a family members. I rate that. And I do think everyone stresses about it, but I can never not have a Christmas dinner. I want the cranberry sauce. I want pigs in blanket. I want cheese wrapped in bacon. Oh, God, I can't. I want big fat chunk of stuffing. Yeah, see, I'm not a massive fan. I really am not. And I think it's because I have Sunday dinners quite frequently.

20:19Rach:Yes, see, I don't have Sunday dinners often. I think turkey is shite. So dry. Unpopular opinion. Don't like turkey. Think it's crap. Gammon's nice. Gammon's nice, yeah, really nice. last year went to the pub game changer absolute game changer did you eat at the pub? no I won't eat out on Christmas I don't like that I don't I did that one year it's the worst decision we ever made I don't think I really want to do that because I just don't feel like it's like Christmas day then like you've got to do something at home or a family's home whatever obviously it's a little bit different this year because my wedding is at that time of year but yeah last year was sick went to the pub had a few beers came home stumbled home had the turkey in the oven from like nine o 'clock in the morning got home took the turkey out of the oven put the rest in ate at about four or five o 'clock but then do you know what go on for days go on for days what I hate about Christmas Day TV shite crap TV I don't like watching TV the only thing I like is the NFL right but after you eat at Christmas dinner everyone crashes everyone and that's the part that annoys me what you all falling asleep that's exactly what i hate turkey trip it's turkey it's tryptophan it's turkey makes you tired so for me don't have turkey you're all fall asleep exactly i'm the same as you like why is everyone asleep now let's play games yeah i'm not a big fan of people falling asleep it really pisses me off to be quite honest i know you're tired i don't think i i am one of those people that won't fall asleep so i can't complain but it's because like you've had your dinner everyone's excited you've had your presents whatever you have your dinner everyone's played the game, whatever, and then it's like, oh, now what?

22:00Rach:Now on telly, some are really pissed, some are not pissed, some are stressed about washing up, some are worried about the walk that they've got to do on Boxing Day. Like, it's always like, there's always a drama on Christmas Day. I get it, but also, you can do whatever you want at Christmas. That's what I think. I'm here to start a new tradition. I'm here for a new tradition, bestie. Well, fuck it, I might start it with you then. But you'll be with me over Christmas anyway this year. yeah exactly anyway next question because we're waffling we have really waffled haven't we I think I've been probably a big carrier of that but would you rather never use gravy again or never eat chocolate again no never eat chocolate again same 100 % who's having dry potatoes not me I'll take my paracena with gravy if you want yeah exactly I could drink gravy I could drink it out of a cup I'm not bothered and also I could just sacrifice chocolate for pick a mix.

22:58Rach:Do you like a Bovril? No. It's literally like gravy besties. It's so nice. I don't. And you know why? Do you know why I've got fear of Bovril because you used to get it when we used to go to academy when we were little. People would have it in those shitty little plastic cups. Yeah, it's the best. Oh, I can't. And when you went to swimming lessons and people used to get those little crappy cups. Yeah, it's the best. I bought a pack of like 60. So I'd never eat chocolate again and rather have gravy. Right. last two questions so we've got one more each what would you rather do for a day fly or be invisible fly I wouldn't want to be invisible I feel like that sometimes anyway I basically feel invisible now so that's brilliant isn't it I'm actually basically invisible 90 % of my days but I'd rather fly I'd want to jet up to Sheffield to me when my dad's in like 0.10 seconds yeah but you have to just drop off where I am obviously best day just get back up and go but yeah I think flying would be sick just like flying yeah 100 % flying yeah flying right also next question last question right this is a big question for me now that Halloween's over when are you putting up your Christmas decorations straight away or wait till December no 1st of December would you ever go earlier yeah actually why not while we're at it start something new middle of November I think we could do a podcast episode of us decorating our trees yes oh no because you'll judge me for not having a real one I'm not having a real one No, you can have a fake one, but I prefer a real one because I like it.

24:30Rach:I like the way they sit, the busher and the nicer. And that's a lovely question because we are actually going to put our Christmas decorations up early and we're going to do an episode showing you all our decorations. Do you know why I love having it up, right? Not only because it's Christmassy, but I just love it. It's always like a nice little soft light. You don't need a lamp on in your living room, do you? Yeah, you just turn your lights on. And, all right, what lights do you have on? I hope it's not them multicoloured ones. Oh, no, I hate them. They are horrible. I hate them. Warm, warm lights.

24:55Rach:warm, dimmed, subtle, nice and I'll let you in on another little trick by the 1st of December all my presents will be sorted I can't believe you just thought that I would have them colourful lights no I'm just checking Bessie because I would have judged you and I would have told you to take them back I thought you were going to say do you wrap tinsel around your bannister how horrible is tinsel? he's horrible I don't like tinsel I'm not ever tinsel ever tried to put tinsel anywhere near my house. I'm getting punched in the face, mate. Just kidding. Anyway, guys, that is it for today's episode Q &A.

25:35Rach:I think this has definitely been their favorite episode so far. So thank you so much for your questions. We love them lots. Keep sending them in and we will see you very soon. Peace out. Bye, guys. Bye.

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