Mother’s Day Special with Mama Bright

9:47Nicola Bright:It's so nice. I think it's because of the personalities that you both are because you're both very humble people. You've always been very grounded. so it's just normal life yeah you might be celebrities in football but you're just normal people we're not celebrities you're very grounded but you are but you're very grounded and you're still just normal people doing normal everyday things this is why this podcast is so good

10:10Millie Bright:yeah I think that's hard for us isn't it like you forget that like you actually have a bit of a name in football but then like us walking around in pyjamas walking to Tesco yeah I will go to Tesco in my hoodie and I will go in my slippers because I'm not bothered. And I think that got,

10:25Nicola Bright:that was more so after the Euros when you won it for home Euros. Yeah, that was crazy.

10:30Millie Bright:Is that one of your favourite memories? Like of me and Rachel together, what's like one thing, what's like a moment that stands out?

10:36Nicola Bright:No, it's the 2019 World Cup in France. Really? I remember that, that Airbnb, do you remember? Eee, God, I know which night she's going to say.

10:49Millie Bright:Mouldy, dust everywhere, dirty mum was like, we're not snobs by no means, but mum, I remember mum ringing me just going, Emily, I can't stay in this, not what it said it was, the pictures of life.

10:58Nicola Bright:Your mum was there as well, and Jim, and I said, I'm not stopping here, and the lady was showing us around, she said, what's the matter with your face? You don't like it? And because my face, I was smiling, well, I was thinking I was smiling, but I clearly wasn't because my face was saying opposite. And I said to your mum, I said, I can't stop here, Louise, it's disgusting. So then you two came out, early hours of the morning. This must have been like, it must have been one,

11:20Millie Bright:I remember we had to text Phil. And we had to be like, boss, we're going to have to go out. We've got to sort our families out. They've literally got nowhere to stay. It was like 2am. And we had to go and sort them somewhere to go.

11:30Nicola Bright:And on the day when we got stuck in train station and we got robbed. And nobody, we didn't know what to do. We sat on train station floor and there were no trains. It had all been cancelled. And it was like 40 degrees in that. And you two ended up sorting us out.

11:42Millie Bright:Just for the record, whenever we go to a tournament, my family and Rachel's family, they make a group chat. So it's Lulu and you. Oh, yeah. What were the chats? we've named them after the tournaments haven't we what was it best family World Cup family World Cup family Coro's family and we all just used to put crazy stuff in there and it was Lulu and Mom and photographs and photographs and then that was kind of like an SOS group weren't it in case they needed anything they could put in but we've done that every tournament like our families have had like a group chat it's hard though isn't it like we always say this Mel like when you're away on tournaments and stuff like navigating football and family and how to make sure everyone's all right.

12:22Millie Bright:But then, I don't know, people always say you've got to leave it to the family reps and stuff, and we just can't do that, can we? We're also not the type of people. If I don't know where my family is staying, have they got the flights sorted? Is that done? Is this done? When am I seeing them? I'm not going to enjoy the tournament. And I think that's been something that's been really hard. That France World Cup, that was the most stressful. You're sorting your family out at 1am. like we literally train it next day and thank God like Phil understood and was supportive and kind of we had the same like mentality but we also had the same we also just sort of said like alright well if he says no then we're going anyway like yeah we said that to each other we're going regardless so I think we even said that to him we said we're going regardless we've got to sort our families out he was like yeah alright be safe yeah alright be safe like there's no way you're back

13:12Nicola Bright:I think the the Australia one was way better though because you organised it before we went didn't you and we knew exactly what we were doing. We'd got an itinerary for five weeks, what we planned before, and that was way better. And I think listening to some of the parents, the last one, was it Switzerland, the Euros? I think that was a lot better organised for the families and friends. It looked good, to be fair.

13:32Millie Bright:Yeah, it did. And that's what I say, we can't speak on those ones, only the ones we've been at. But while we're on tournaments, what is probably, what is your favourite moments of us all being together, like football matches, away tournaments? what are your standout memories that way I don't know you watching me and Rach or whatever or what is your standout moment

13:53Nicola Bright:it's the times before the match and after the match that are the most important because that's when you get to see your person and it's like for whatever reason whether it's celebrating or whether it's commiserating I think that's when families are important so it is important to look after the families because that's the most the most heartwarming times of those tournaments is seeing you girls after

14:14Millie Bright:and before

14:15Nicola Bright:so we know that you're okay and it's a long time to be away.

14:18Millie Bright:I think that's a big moment for us is when we're always on pitch after and we used to do our lap and we'd be pointing like, oh, like, you'd be like, your dad's there or I've got mum's there and we'd be waving and we always look to like each other's families. I think that's a thing for me that stands out.

14:33Nicola Bright:And like for me and your dad as parents and your mum would be saying, Rachel, it's knowing that you're there in the crowd for when you look up at that moment after that match or before that match. and it gets to be like a bit superstitious as well you've got to do that same thing you've got to say that same thing

14:48Millie Bright:Yeah, it is, it's those moments I remember Millie all the time at England I'd be like, Millie, where are they? I can't see them You'd have to be like, we used to do it in line up, remember? National Anthems would be like, Rachel, they're up there and I'm like, where? I can't see them Right guys, we are going to take a quick break but there's more ghosts to come This episode is brought to you by Athletic Brewing Company No matter how you do game day On the couch, in the crowd, or manning the snack table, Athletic Brewing fits right in. With a full lineup of non-alcoholic beer styles, you can enjoy bold flavors all game long.

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15:41Millie Bright:Welcome back to the second part of our chat with Mama Bee. How difficult is it, Nick, to, like, hear criticism in a stadium or see criticism online of Millie? Well, me or you, let me tell you, if she sees anything of either of us, she'll write messages. I know exactly what she does. She'll write messages out and I'll be like, delete, delete.

16:01Nicola Bright:No, she'll tell you how long my block and delete list is. I do it to, I block and delete commentators, I block and delete trolls I block and delete fake accounts I block and delete anything when I see not just if it's if it's criticism and it's constructive that's fair enough take that but when it's hate when it's just negative and it's always about one person and I'll tell you now as a parent I'll tell you now that is the hardest thing that is the worst thing about this football I'm so glad we had 10 years where it was hardly any but these last two years have been soul destroying

16:37Millie Bright:yeah I always think that like because it is hard like it must be hard to not respond or you know whereas we could probably ignore it you'll see all that like parents like my mum's often said to me before have you seen this comment about you and I'm like nope I've got it wrote down I've got names

16:55Nicola Bright:I've got names I've got names I've wrote them all down I've screenshot I know them all every single one

17:00Millie Bright:do you find it hard not being able because I will say as a player I have to before every tournament I've done it but also I say to them as things get more a month like attracted to media and you know our names get a little bit bigger each time we're successful you can't ever comment on anything like and my family never would anyway they're not the type of they're not the type of people to do that it's not in our nature but you also do have a responsibility to kind of behave in the same way as we behave and I think that is also hard because if you worked a nine-to-five job let me tell you if someone said certain things to me I'd be saying something back.

17:34Millie Bright:But obviously... I think from a mum's perspective, though, like we can probably shut some of it out, but I think that's proof in the pudding. Like you're not just hurting the person that you're saying something about, you're hurting the family. Like I know for a fact, Nicola, you'll lose several days of sleep, nights of sleep for nasty comments. I've made myself very, very ill, very ill with anxiety and struggling to sleep

17:57Nicola Bright:for weeks on end because of comments I've read. And it's always comments that aren't even true, comments that are hateful there's no reason where they're actually coming from and I don't understand why people are so vile

18:10Millie Bright:I think it's easier for us to accept Rach because we know it is becoming part and parcel of the game but I think it's always harder for family to accept it and tolerate it but I always think that because it's like they don't get it do you know what I mean you're somebody's daughter you're somebody's sister you're somebody's auntie it affects them more than it affects us and I think once it affects your mum it affects you more than it is. Like, if a comment comes out and you see it, you might be able to go, that's not very nice. But if your mum sees it and she's upset about it, you're now upset because your mum's upset.

18:41Millie Bright:So it has like a negative connotation the whole way through.

18:44Nicola Bright:I've started to realise, Rachel, now that it's a minority of people and it's often people that don't even understand football that are saying it. They're not even real people. And they're definitely not real fans. Yeah, but it's still hard to read it and even if it's two comments, it's two comments too much because I've always brought my children up and as you've been brought up Rachel that if you can't say anything kind then

19:06Millie Bright:shut your mouth don't say it oh yeah exactly families see like what we've put in for years and years and years like they've seen all the sacrifice they see the hard times they see the things that fans don't don't see do you know what I mean or not even just fans like anyone sees like no one knows what we go for on a daily basis to be where we are today like no one's seen what we've gone through no one knows personal situation because we don't air everything like I don't have to do that, but families do see that. So they're like, Lord, on a set, she's given this, this, this, this, this. No one even knows she's going through that, and she's still doing all of this.

19:42Millie Bright:And then that's why I think it's harder for them to accept. But to be honest, now I just become like, I'm a little bit numb to it. I'm just like, okay, cool, like, whatever.

19:51Nicola Bright:I think it's how quick, you know, you girls are national treasures. You won the home Euros. You were part of that squad that won the home Euros. and I think that's what's hard where you're here and then somebody swipes your legs one comment everybody jumps on the bandwagon and before you know it everybody hates you it's like it's bizarre I've never I mean I understand football it's the world

20:15Millie Bright:it's the world of sport though you can be the world's greatest and then the next day you can be it changes so fast that is literally and I think that's something that I've had to I don't know about you but I know you'll have been the same but you have to drive your family into having that same mentality is the minute you don't let it slide, I can't let it slide. So the quicker we can get on the same page. And it's hard, like, of course it's hard. I think that's one of the hardest things to demand off your family is to just ignore it. Because like I said, to family, they're living normal lives.

20:44Millie Bright:Like we live a life of luxury, so it's different. Whereas we're expecting people that live just normal lives to tolerate it. And if I was living that same life, I wouldn't be tolerating it. Do you know what I mean? It's hard. I always feel guilty for expecting them because I'm like, it's just as much your career as mine and that's how I've always, that's what I've always said to you.

21:03Nicola Bright:And we have felt that because we've been on this journey. Yeah, of course. You've had this career and allowed us to be on this journey and it's been the most wonderful journey ever. Honestly, we've been so proud and loved it. But, you know, we always think now a saying is, can it kill you? No, it can't. Let it go.

21:19Millie Bright:Yeah. What's been your favourite thing to come of football? Like, what's, if you think of like from...

21:27Nicola Bright:My favourite thing to come of football is that you're able to, you're in a place now, this has nothing to do with football, because I'm not football, but this is you're in a place now where you can, you're part of Young Minds for Mental Health for Children. You're doing this podcast, which honestly, everybody that you speak to has got nothing but praise and we love it and it helps us. And all the comments are about people that you've, you know, saved them from something because of something you've said, because you just do two normal people.

21:52Millie Bright:Yeah, it's pretty special when we see that, isn't it, Rach?

21:54Nicola Bright:And that for me is the best thing that's come out of the football.

21:57Millie Bright:That's exactly like, I'll never, ever, ever forget in 2019 in that hotel at Wembley. And we just sat there and like, we just went, we should start something together. Well, we kept doing our handshakes, didn't we? Yeah. And people kept commenting saying like how we'd help them just by, you know, a video with Dawn or a handshake with Dawn or something. And I think that that obviously was so important to both of us to help other people. but like we're both very, like we're driven, like we're so driven to like help people and make a change and whatnot. And I think the best thing, one of the best things that's come out for me as well is the podcast.

22:33Millie Bright:Cause it's literally like, it's therapy for us. Cause we get time with each other that we, we weren't able to usually fit in. It's our little brand, isn't it? It's like, it's our little baby. We help people. Sorry. Yeah. So that's really nice to hear that. That's something that.

22:49Nicola Bright:And that's, that's the best thing for me that's come out. Obviously, the matches, the trophies, everything, but the main thing is that you've put yourself in a position where you're able, and you are giving back, which is like, that's what you want your children to do. You know, be kind people, be good people, and you've given back.

23:07Millie Bright:This is another thing I was going to say. It's like, there's so many days that Millie's probably missed, because I know, like, in my career, obviously being in America or being, you know, there's times when you're like, I've missed my nephew's birthday party, stuff like that. Is it hard for you to see that Millie's... Like, you do family things and Millie's not there, or did it just become like the norm? I hate that. Same. I hate it so much.

23:29Nicola Bright:Yeah, it's been hard, but I didn't mind, because if she couldn't get there because she's got football, then I'm not there anyway, so it made no difference. But we have missed a lot. Yeah, true.

23:39Millie Bright:Mum and Dad cancel a lot because they choose football overboard. What do I always tell you? Plan ahead, and if I can be there, like you're 50. Yeah. I drove all the way up, surprised her at a meal, and then I drove all the way back to London. so I will always try and make it where possible but that's hard for me because I always see it going in the family chat and I have to be like sorry guys football as always

23:57Nicola Bright:and that's the one thing we have at the family chat so we've always put photos in if we've had a birthday meal we've always FaceTimes at the meal so that she can just be part of it but it's just become the norm at the minute that Rachel but you know what I'm so excited now she's retired from England is we do actually get this time together

24:11Millie Bright:more time yeah

24:12Nicola Bright:it's like we've we're catching up so everybody tries to cram it all in yeah it's the kids though as well Rachel

24:20Millie Bright:they pull on your heartstrings like I come back and Vinnie and Harvey are like we've missed you and then I have Al be like oh I do love seeing Auntie Millie back and like went out for a meal the other night and you're like oh you're not going are you Auntie Millie I was like no I'm just going for a meal because normally when I say I'm going they know I'm going to London yeah so it's getting this time back that's like really really special but that's what I told you when I retired remember I was saying like I just have so much time to do the things that I didn't get to do with the family and stuff.

24:48Millie Bright:But on that note, have you got any plans for Mother's Day? It'll be football. Take a wild guess. Football. Football. Yeah. What about you, Rach? What's your mum going to be doing? I actually don't know. I've not looked that far in advance at my schedule yet. But if I'm available, I'll definitely pop up and see her and do something. We always have like delayed events, don't we? Yeah. We always celebrate on different days. Exactly.

25:09Nicola Bright:She will have something planned for her, don't worry. And it's only a day, so you can do that day any day. I mean, it's Mother's Day every day when you see your children anyway, so that's all you need. You have a FaceTime. It's still a gift on Mother's Day because you don't get to see her very often. So we take FaceTimes, Rachel. Your mum will be fine with that.

25:24Millie Bright:Right, I know I don't need to give you any introduction to what comes next. It is my favourite, Block and Delete. Sign her up, guys. It's just to think. My favourite part. Like mother, like daughter. Honestly. Right, so Nicola, welcome to Block and Delete.

25:42Nicola Bright:I'm not going to give you 10, but I'm going to give you my one this week. When somebody asks you a question for their opinion and you give it to them and then they're offended, I don't get it because I can't get why what I've said is offensive when you've asked for my opinion. That's a really good one.

25:59Millie Bright:I'm sick to death of people asking for my opinion and then when I give it, it's not good enough or they don't like it. Yeah, so that's so true. People don't like to hear the truth sometimes, do they? Don't ask for it then.

26:10Nicola Bright:And it's like my mum always told me to tell the truth. Well, that's the most dangerous thing you can ever do. tell the truth she tells it but obviously with being ADHD as well it's the thing what you you say it as it is there's no filter and it's a yeah you say it as it is but you I really cannot understand no matter how people tell me like I said something the day like somebody oh you look good for your age I mean somebody said you can't say that that's offensive but why is it somebody said that to me I won't be offended you know what I said

26:38Millie Bright:the other day though this I think this were a little bit bad no I don't think it was actually we went shopping and we were in lift with Gran, me, mum, Gran and Albie. And then there were this, and I will say it, there was this little old lady, like fully grey hair. She looked like my nan. So I'd say, oh, my little old nan. And I said, oh, Albie, stepped aside, let this little old lady come in. And then my mum and Gran looked at each other and I went, should I have said that or not? And I went, oh God, I'm ever so sorry. Like, I just, I've seen you as my nan. Yeah, maybe don't say the old part.

27:08Millie Bright:Or the little part. Or the little part for that man. I thought it were cute, little old lady. That's how it's something I do, though. Just say it how it is. And then I looked at, I seen her face,

27:19Nicola Bright:let's say, I was like, oh, have I said something? At least you apologised to her. That's the main thing. I said, oh, sorry, I didn't mean anything by it. You're just reminding me of my nan. But that's the sort of thing. You would just say things as they are, the true things, and then it gets you in deep water.

27:32Millie Bright:I agree with that, actually. Don't ask my opinion if you don't want it.

27:35Nicola Bright:Yeah, because I find it hard then when you've given the truth. Well, then next time you're just going to be like, no. yeah I can't give you my opinion because you won't like it but that's offensive isn't it because they know that you're thinking

27:45Millie Bright:yeah they won't like the answer either so you're screwed right best of your part between a rock and a hard place right so I like to do the lighter part which is obviously gratitude so is there something that you would like to share that you've been grateful for this week

27:57Nicola Bright:yes it's a person this week and she's called Annie and she's my littlest brother's girlfriend because she turned up out the blue to Amy's obviously she had a cesarean she'd only just come home it was day three of having the baby and she turned up out of the blue and said, Amy, I've come to take your dog out. We were into getting nursery. Yeah, because Coco's obviously a Spaniel and she's so lively and she's so missed the long walks.

28:20Millie Bright:She's not had a walk for like three days. She's been out guarding.

28:22Nicola Bright:So she came, she'd got a dog treat bag. She'd got everything. She was taking her out to Derbyshire and she just took the dog. For hours, bestie, hours. As she was going out, she said to Amy, I've left you a little something. And you know, like you always get the baby things. Well, she works for the co-op and she'd left this bag, brown paper bag and inside it was chocolate bread, a bunch of roses and just some little snacky things and some tea bags and just some nice things for Amy. Yeah, you don't think to do that, do you? She didn't have to do it. She just came out the blue and she took the dog, which she knows means a lot to Amy that her dog's had a walk because Amy's dog is a baby as well.

28:59Nicola Bright:And then she brought Amy some little bits and it were really nice, weren't it? Yeah, it was lovely. Annie, did you say?

29:05Millie Bright:Annie, yeah. Well, I'm grateful for Annie then for doing that because that's such a kind thing to do. Yeah, you're all grateful for it. Is there anything you're grateful for? What are you grateful for this week? Auntie Millie.

29:19Nicola Bright:Everything, that's good.

29:20Millie Bright:Everything. For me. Oh, you're going to make my heart melt, Harvey. He's such a cutie. He's got such a good heart, this kid. Look at his little smile. Cheeky chops. Right, everybody. We hope you enjoyed this episode. A special shout out to all the mothers out there. We hope you have a wonderful day. And for those that unfortunately can't be with us on Mother's Day, we're all thinking of you. And for all the families, we send our love and to keep celebrating everybody, whether they are with us or not with us. Mama B, hope you enjoyed. I've loved it. She's definitely making another appearance because we're too in sync.

29:55Millie Bright:And we love you all. And we hope you enjoyed this guest. But there's more to come. We loved it. We love having Nicola. She's literally my second mom. So thanks for coming on. And keep sending us your gratitude and block and delete. Yeah, we love them guys. We love it. Keep sending them in. Bye from me. Bye. Bye.