#606 - Lainey Wilson

33:23Oh, shit. Use Perplexity and see what they got. Pick up Whiskey on a Wednesday. Look at twang in my bones Twang in my bones That's good I got that twang in my bones I think you need an MRI If you have a twang in your bones Pixie moon like daydreams Is this what people think of me? Mason jar of miracles Hey those are some good peaches Kissed by kudzu Sounds like you need some damn calamon lotion That's all that is Kissed by your cousin Yeah, kiss by your cousin It's just some guy Who has a kudzu rash on He's so Inflamed from the kudzu You can't even tell if you're related or not Kiss by my cousin That's a good one See if they make them sillier If you look up goofier ones There you go Honky tonk hiccups That is hilarious But it'd have to be honky tonk hiccups sand and boots that'd be the best they should have dude there's been a time where I thought I was about to have hiccups on stage oh yeah and what do you have to do oh I think you're supposed to eat a bunch of sugar or something right I do that anyway oh yeah alright so I ought to be clear but uh no and then there was one time where I was like I don't know what's happening but I feel like I'm about to burp I'm feeling I don't know.

34:59And it's just like you have to just get it off your, like somehow get it off your mind. Just like start staring at somebody or you're about to sneeze. Oh, the craziest. Oh, that feeling. One guy came to get, like, somebody was introduced me to their friend the other day. And the guy just kind of came in for, and as he's coming in for like a close, like handshake thing, I was just going into a sneeze. I didn't know. No, you did not. I sneezed right into him. Sneezed right into the guy. Yeah. And I think that's like a mating call in some cultures or whatever. I didn't mean it to be I don't know what did he do he just kind of went like that I don't know what would he do he wasn't stoked he wasn't upset he was understanding but it was did you say I'm sorry or just like thank you I was like well what do you expect you know so and that's what I think about the government that's what I said oh my gosh what are some of the goofier titles bringing back up Oh, my gosh.

35:59Lasso my latte. Ooh, that's a good one. That's what you're doing over there right there. God, I need that. Lasso that latte. Boot scooting Wi-Fi is pretty good. Stop. I'll hold up. Gravy on my guitar, it just reminds me. Hardy took me and some of my crew to a strip club in Huntsville. Mm-mm. And they have biscuits and gravy night. Uh-uh. Yes. Oh, that's great, huh? On Thursday nights. And how much is it? Is it pricey over there? Well, he gave me 101s, and it was like, have fun. It was like my end of tour gift. It was? And you're over there just buying biscuits and gravy? Well, it wasn't biscuits and gravy night that night.

36:42We had just missed it. This was like a Friday night or something. Oh, got it. I've seen them do bingo night at a strip club, too, which is kind of cool. Because everybody will get right up there and be using their blotters and stuff. and some of the Christian women will even blot out their eyes so they don't see all the sexual stuff. Uncle Buck's Boobie Bungalow, that's it right there. Is that what it's called? That's it. Uncle Buck's Boobie Bungalow, and they got biscuits and gravy. What night is that on? Yeah, we're going to have to ride on down there. Oh. Ride on down there. Load up. Load up.

37:14I'll take Tex for one last ride down there to Huntsville.

37:21God, I'm trying to think of what food goes good with a good tit or whatever kind of, I shouldn't even say it, but you know. Anything. Yeah. Well, supposedly, I don't know if this is true or not, but they were like, y 'all got to come back for biscuits and gravy night, blah, blah, blah. And I thought, that's nice, you know, sit around, eat some biscuits and gravy. No, they're rolling around in the gravy and people are throwing the biscuits. No. Yes. Oh, yeah. I don't want that. My mother loves biscuits and gravy. If I took her and you didn't get to eat it, she would be upset. Oh, this is Uncle Buck's third annual biscuits and gravy rassling.

38:03Rassling. Oh. I love how they spelled rassling. Well, the recipe better be good because I'll tell you this. If I'm even that close to biscuits and gravy. I'm going to eat it. Yeah. I'm going to have a little. I'm going to have a little. I'm going to have me a bite. You're telling me somebody ain't going to whip something around fast enough where just something's going to land in my mouth, honey. You're dang right. God, I just hope it's sausage gravy, too. I really like that.

38:31What about Halloween? What was y 'all's Halloween like growing up? Do you remember that over there? I mean, we'd go to like... Could y 'all even trick-or-treat or was there not enough folks? We'd have to go to Monroe to trick-or-treat because that was like the biggest town. We'd just go to like random subdivisions and, you know... Go to the rich subdivisions? Yeah. People that had lights out in front of their house? Oh, yeah. I was like, oh, these people got money. Oh, dude, we had electricity inside our house. Yeah, like normal people. That's right. But some people had a light right outside of their front door.

39:00And I was like, you got to be effing kidding. I know. I was like, must be nice. Must be nice to open your front door and see what's happening in the world at night. Uh-huh. That kind of shit pissed me off, dude. I know. I know. But we would like some years, like I lived on this one road that we just had a few neighbors. And so we'd go like see my granny and we'd go see, you know, the Olivos and we'd go down the road and see the Graysons. And would everybody dress up or no? Me and my sister would. Yeah. Yeah. Did you dress up for Halloween? Yeah, I dressed up. I had some kind of alternative or not like, like our mom was always working.

39:38So we'd have to get dressed up. Like our dad was like in charge of getting us dressed up or whatever. And he was like 75 years old or whatever. So he didn't know what was going on. What was I? Oh, I remember one year I was a ghost, but I was like too scared to stand on the sheet or whatever. No, you were like claustrophobic. Yeah, I was just like, I'd be like, ooh, but then I'd lift it up and be like, it's me. I'm under here, it's me. Like I would scare myself, you know? You are lying. Oh, I definitely remember that, dude. I was like, I cannot be a ghost anymore. What else? I was a wheelchair.

40:09One year I had a little chair, like a kid's chair that we put like around a rope on my neck, and I carried two bike tires with me. It was pretty cute. You are lying. I swear. You needed to be in that parade. I was right. What are you talking about? That parade that went through your town, that's the parade you needed to be in. Tallest kid, best list. He always got his own car in that parade. Dang it. He's over there just trying to whistle at people. We might have been from the same town. Dude, yeah, there was something nice about that. Or somebody that had too many freckles, they'd put them in the parade sometimes.

40:43You know, there'd always be some girl named Abigail or something that had too many dang freckles. That's right. Dude, I'll tell you something that was amazing was I was in, I had a show in Winnipeg, Canada after the show. They said there's some people here that are actors in town that were doing a show here and they wanted to come and say hello. And I got to meet the people from Little House on the Prairie. They're redoing it. Remember that show? That's cool. Yeah. They're redoing it. That's cool. So when's that happening? It's coming out. And I got to go to set the next day too. What was that like?

41:17awesome was it just like even the like the clothes and everything just seemed like from a different time everything period pieces there they are that's gonna be incredible and yeah the reboot you think you'd ever want to be in something like that i don't know i met the man who's doing charles engels and he's i would have to be his brother that was in an accident or something because he's really got the looks all locked up you know you ever meet somebody like that They're just so good. They keep all the good looks to themselves. Yeah. Yeah. They're over there just. There's a lot of people like that.

41:52Yeah. They're over there looking at photos of themselves and shit. I'm just hiding from mirrors, you know. Exactly. I won't just turn the light out. I'm over there just buying five watt bulbs from my house, you know, just trying to keep my own reflection away from me. Amen. Were you in pageants growing up? You were in pageants. Yeah. I was in one pageant, and it was a Farm Bureau pageant. My mama back in the day was the Farm Bureau queen, and so she was like, you know, I'd love for you to be in the Farm Bureau pageant. And so the onstage question was, what does agriculture mean to you? And I think I had one line, and I think it was what really sealed the deal.

42:35And I said, agriculture is the backbone of America. And then I think they just said, give it to her. Give it to her. Give it to her. Yeah, that's pretty much what I was right there. Oh, my God. You won it. I won the Franklin Parish one. That's big, though. That's big, boy. But my sister, she went through a little phase where she was doing some pageants. And this is hilarious, but she was doing the watermelon pageant. I think that's in Ruston, Louisiana. and she gets up to the microphone and she goes, I'm Jana Wilson, Kunkaskakent number three. And then in the microphone she goes, shit. And then walks off.

43:22She definitely didn't win. But she won a lot of people's hearts that day. Kunkaskakent. Oh, if you said dang Kunkaskakent. Oh, we had. That's beautiful. She was in another one and it was a junior miss pageant. And they asked her, they said, what does going green mean to you? And she goes, don't pollute. She's off. Didn't win that one either. Dang, dude. Y 'all needed what y 'all needed was like a kind of a question and answer groom or something. I know. Y 'all didn't practice it. We needed a coach. Yeah, y 'all needed a damn coach. We just like had the bullet points, you know what I'm saying? Just one bullet point.

44:03Yep. That's awesome, dude. Just to get to the point. Yeah, that's it, honey. We don't waste anybody's time up here. Don't pollute. Yeah, we got to get these crops out of the ground. That's it. We do not have time to waste. Did you tune in with a lot of that JonBenet stuff? Did you ever tune in with it? You know what? Being a kid, I remember a little something about all that. But is there a new show or something that's out about it right now? No, I don't think so. There was one that came out last year. Was it? And I watched it. Yeah, and I mean, I think it's one of those weird things because like a little kid was like this, you know, like.

44:40And so I started thinking about it. I think, and I know he's not going to be happy to hear me say this. And I'd love to have him come on the podcast and talk about it sometime. The dad did it. Really? I shouldn't have said that or he might have come on. Really? So they did find her, though? I don't think you did it, sir. Did they find her? Yeah, they found her. They found her. She wasn't alive when they found her. Some people think she's still alive. But yeah, anyway, sorry to bring the buzz down. I just didn't know if... What year was that? I was like early 90s? 96. Ooh, 96, baby. Dang. That is so strange.

45:21I know. Strange. But did you get caught up like that? Was there people in there out there? Were you like, oh, this kid, you know? Were you guys that deep in the trenches of it? Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. So we like went to the consignment shop and bought the dress they had. That's the one I wore. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, you guys were just kind of last-minute pageant. We're just like, or a double-up. Like for the Farm Bureau pageant, I was like, I'm going to wear my prom dress. Like we got to get our money's worth, you know? Yeah. So that's what I did. I like that. That's what I did. I like that.

46:00Were you ever in pageants? No, we didn't have that. They did have a good, but I didn't have any direction as a child, and I did get to dress myself for photo days and stuff like that. Did you? Like, what would you put on? I do a tank top sometimes. I would do. Tank top. Yeah, I did one year. I did a costume kind of thing. The wheelchair costume? No, skeleton. And then one year I did do a nice outfit. It was kind of like a bow tie and stuff like that. Maybe see if you can search that up real quick. See if you can find me in a little bow tie. Let's go. You were like, I'm going to dress nice today Yeah, well I'd seen somebody else dress nice And I was like, oh I see what they're doing I see what these bastards are doing Oh there's one That's when I lived in Russia For a little while Different times Right there Let's go Look at that ear pierced too That hair, I had glasses too I was blind as a cat That's actually me That's me.

47:00What if that picture of you when I look the same? That'd be crazy. We brother and sister. Man. God, those are the days. That was fun. Look at that. Being alive, piercing your own ear. Did you do that? Did you pierce your own ear? Yeah, I did. What are you freaking talking about? I'm a man. I did not. I went to the Claire's in the mall. Y 'all did? God. I was just a little baby. My mama got my ears pierced when I was like a few months old. Uh-uh. Really? Brought me home and my daddy was mad. You got it looking like it is kind of crazy. Your kid can't even see that good. And you got, dang, you know, you got earrings.

47:40Yeah. Like feather earrings. You got some big hoops coming off her or something. Hey. What's the youngest you can get a child's ears pierced in America? There's got to be a two week. I don't know. There's got to be like a catch and release type of thing or something. What's the youngest age to pierce a child here? Two months. What is it? Around two to four. After that vaccine, it says. Uh-huh. Because I guess if they put in that metal or semi-precious metal through your ear, you can't be allergic to things that are semi-precious. Uh-huh. So, that's it. When you're touring, are you choosing places to go now?

48:22Or like, what's that like? Well, it's kind of like mapped out to the point where it's like, Like, I don't know how it is for you. It's like we want to try to make sure that, you know, we're letting the demand build back up in that city and things like that. And then trying to make sure that we are going to different places, you know, kind of like popping in some of these little corners that we hadn't really got to hit just yet. So, yeah, it's like it's a team effort of just figuring out where we're going. We're about to go back to Australia. Yeah. You've been to Australia. So good. Did you go to Bondi Beach?

48:54I have not been to Bondi. Bring it up real quick. Just so you don't forget to go. It's worth going. It's like 18 minutes outside of Sydney. Okay. And you just take a ferry? No, you can drive right there. Oh, really? It's the most beautiful beach I've seen that's not like a super tropical place, if that makes any sense. Got it. So it's kind of like a city on the beach. Yeah. Wow. It's a pretty... Man, I'd love to do that. If you have a family and stuff, do you think you'll raise them over there in Nashville or not? Do you know? I will. You will? I will. I think Nashville is just a good spot. But like even if, you know, music wasn't a thing, I think it's just I think they got like good schools.

49:31And and I feel like you can go far out right now. You can go far out enough on any side and still feel like you're in the country. You know, I want to I want to raise my kids like I did, like playing in the dirt. And I don't know. I just want them to like be outside and and do the things that we grew up doing. You know what I'm saying? and just enjoy those things too because you see these kids at these supper tables on their iPads and on cell phones. I'm like, oh gosh. Grilling like digital meats and stuff on there. Yeah. Me and Duck took some kids that he coached last year to eat Mexican food not too long ago and these two little boys across from us.

50:19Sorry, that's just a great, that's like. That's kind of like, that's the Louisiana way of kind of saying we're having a United Nations meeting. Exactly. That's what was happening. Look, look. I mean, look. Yeah. But these two boys sitting across from us, they were twins. And they were just like, for 17 years old, like carrying on, great conversation, making eye contact. Like, it was, you could just tell that they were like raised right. And then I realized, like, they said they had never had social media. And I was like, that's why you can carry on a conversation? Dang. Dang. Well, a lot of people are homeschooling their kids now, too, and keeping everything away from them, you know?

51:08Which I'm not trying to, like, you know, keep everything away from them because I think then you kind of mess up, you know? Well, they said there's pedophiles in the roadblocks now. That's what I heard yesterday. You know? Yeah, I've heard it. Uh-huh. They're everywhere. Well, yeah, but I didn't think they were in the Roblox, honey, you know. I know they're out in these streets. Roblox facing mounting lawsuits as parents across USL's company enables child predators. Stop. So I just want you to think I'm making that up. Stop. That's how I feel, too. I discontinued my account. I just only had it for two weeks.

51:43You have to be protecting and watching. That's what I'm saying. You could do homeschooling. I want you to homeschool my kids. I'd love for you. Uncle Theo. All right. Dude, that would be so great. That would be terrible. What are you talking about, man? You would teach them something. You would teach them. You would educate them. Oh, hell yeah, boy. You would educate them. I'd teach them how to do CPR. Uh-huh. With a unique style that a lot of people don't do. Which is what? A lot of people breathe straight into the lungs. I kind of take a roundabout pattern. What are you, like people's elbow on or something?

52:27I do different stuff. Okay, okay. But are you really certified? Decent success rate. Yeah, I'm certified in CPR, honey. Are you really? I need to see like a badge or something. I don't believe it. Hey, hey, hey. I'm deputized. Did you know that? I can believe that. Look. I'm deputized. Are you? Yes. Just by somebody in town that was a sheriff gave you one? in Richland Parish they asked my daddy to be a deputy you better quit and uh and then daddy was like I'll do it if Laney can do it yeah I love that someone up there and got sworn in did you I love that dude I was at a Vols game like probably a year and a half ago and some guy up there some and I will say he was an I don't want to say he was an alcoholic but he had drunk a lot and he probably drunk most of his life and um you could tell because some of his kids didn't even talk to him or whatever but anyway what I was saying was he was like kind of he was getting drunk and I said I'm gonna go downstairs and say to somebody and he goes well look man if you have any trouble down there he goes I'm a sheriff just flash my badge you know so this guy gave me a sheriff's badge right I swear so I didn't know how they work or whatever so I'm down there talking and then something happened in this area where like some people started like we're kind of talking shit to each other and stuff so I just break this thing out right You're alive I swear You had the right to mean silence No I didn't do that I'm not a cop I'm a sheriff dude I'm just Sheriff's just raise the badge That's right That's right Yeah and then they go get something to eat You know what I'm saying Yes But I flashed that thing And then a real cop A female police officer Kind of like pushed me up against the wall And she's like What's going on here And they She like Was like Remanding me for having a fake Identification or whatever And I was like the guy Gave it to me you know But it was spooky for a minute I thought they were going to take me You thought you were really about to get in trouble Yeah it was like that When was that Probably two years ago or maybe a year and a half I think they were playing Georgia or something And they got their tails kicked Tennessee did but yeah But I remember like god that guy's The worst sheriff or whatever He didn't give me anything He's just like, yeah, like he could have told you.

54:49Yeah. If you got a piss somewhere or just whatever, that shit gets heavy, you flash this bitch. And I flash that bitch and I just, oh my gosh. Right up against the wall that lady had me. I was pretty nervous, but I respect her. She's doing her job right there. That's right. Oh, that doesn't look like me. That looks like a, first of all, that looks like a pretty decent looking woman in the town I'm from. I will say that. Oh, I remember them haircuts. Yes. Oh, God, yeah. When we had our bus driver, we cut everybody's hair. Your bus driver cut people's hair? Mr. Ray, yeah. He cut his hair. He had a barbershop.

55:25I don't know if he had a barbershop. I thought you meant as y 'all were walking off the bus, he just... He would pull over probably six times a year. He'd have those clippers going. He'd get everybody in there cut up. You are lying. 40 minutes, he'd cut everybody on that thing. That is hilarious. He'd walk right off that thing. Everybody would be looking slick walking off there. Pretty slick enough. With their ears lowered. And the best thing is if everybody looks the same, nobody looks better or worse. You ever had like a real bad haircut?

55:56I mean like a real real bad haircut I mean, yeah, I've had almost all of them. I think if you just look through pictures of me online, you'll see them. You're right, you're right. I've had one. Yeah, I went to that Roberts Beauty College or something that was in our town, and they were running a special. It was like 75 cents to get your hair cut. And I was like, well, at that price, I got to go over there. 100%. You got to see what it's about. It must just be a great deal. And so I got in there. I got in there, dude. And they were letting people that were just like, I don't even know if they were hair cutters.

56:27Some of them were just like recovering mechanics and stuff. They were letting anybody. Recovering mechanics. Anybody who could keep their hands stable enough in that bitch, they put a pair of scissors in them. And, yeah, they did stuff to me, man. I can't. I still will never be the same. I walked out of there. And I had to walk home about two and a half miles. And the whole time I was so just depressed. And I kept trying to get a good reflection of my head and different things I was walking by. Dude, a bad haircut, like a real bad haircut, it can be painful. Well, especially as a man, because it's like you don't have, as a man, you're not going to grow breasts or you can't wear lipstick.

57:02So, like, you are down 0-2 in your chances of. That's right. And then you just got to wait for it to grow back. Yeah. So you have one item going on. You know, maybe you can do eye drops. But otherwise, it is a haircut. It is a haircut. Duck dyed his hair bleach blonde. No, for what? As a joke. Just like as a joke. What kind of joke was it? Well, I don't know, but I'm going to tell you right now, I didn't think it was funny. I didn't think it was funny. I said, you better sleep with a ball cap on until that thing grows out. Now it's starting to look like frosted tips. Uh-uh, really? We'll take him down a day in Panama City and let him make a little bit of money.

57:36That's where he did it. Nuh-uh. As a joke, we were playing Panama City, and my mama and his mama had this bright idea. They all got it done? No, they just did his. They just did his. And they videoed my reaction seeing it. They did? And it was like, let me say, if you can find it, pull that up. I want to see that. My mouth is wide open. I was like, uh-uh, no, the wedding's off. Wedding's off, bro. Wedding's off, bro. Who's going to play at your wedding? Do you have to play at your own wedding if you're like a really good musician? No, no. I don't, I don't want it to be about, I want it to be about what it's supposed to be about that day.

58:18You know what I'm saying? Oh, yeah. Like. The love, the nuptials. I might write him a song or something and like share it later on or whatever before but like I don't know I'm just like I just didn't know if you have to play it your own I never thought about that I'm not I want to have some kind of jazz band or something like that Big X the plug which I loved y 'all's interview yeah he's great he is great we went and watched the show in Nashville when he was there it was fun it was yeah the whole yeah it's just like it's great energy you know where was he playing he was playing over at um not brooklyn bowl you're not you're talking about brooklyn bowl yep he was playing brooklyn bowl got it yeah it was good i saw red clay strays where'd i see them at they are so good i saw a video of you guys singing right you and brandon yep in canada yeah he's he's the real deal oh i mean they put on a hell of a show i'm just a fan i've yeah I think that it's just like timeless.

59:22It's like they stepped out of another time and they're just doing something so different. I don't know. I'm just a big old fan. And their audience, it's a lot of men too are their fans, I realized. Yes. Yeah, let me see a little bit of that.

59:43That's cool. It's cool.

59:53Oh. Oh.

1:00:11Pass the hat. I'll put some money in that. I'll put my second born in that hat. Uh-huh. That's special, huh? Yeah, he's cool. Have you guys done a song together? No. Do you like to do a lot of collaborations like that, or do you not like it? Well, no. It seems to be really hot right now, too. I love collaborations, but I was doing a bunch of collaborations there for a minute. Oh, that's right. You did another one with Hardy that I loved. Wait in a truck. Yeah. Oh, I forgot that was in a truck, too. Truck, truck. Look, sorry to say that. I didn't. I look. I don't care if you stay in it. God, I don't care if I just.

1:00:46I don't care if you Every one of your songs Talks about a dang Carmax I'm still gonna listen to them You know Well I ain't gonna do that Okay okay I ain't gonna do that I ain't gonna do that I forgot about Waiting the truck too Mmhmm But hey that's okay Waiting the truck Four by four by you Heart like a truck Mmhmm Truck truck And we got one Like I said coming King Ranch King George King James Yeah Yeah I got a damn Heart like a dang little 50cc motorcycle honey Yeah, I got a heart Got a damn outboard motor on it I got a heart Oh my gosh I got a heart that's got That's got damn training wheels on it My nephew just FaceTimed me the other day With no training with Ledger That's the four year old He was like, call Aunt Wayne So right when I think they don't love me He says stuff like that to my sister Like tap in?

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1:04:32and it can be tough when you're also running a business going and running going and running because one thing I don't have time for is messing around with a bunch of complicated systems or confusing databases or information templates just to sell merchandise nope what's really helped me is running my merch through Shopify they save the day it doesn't matter if I'm backstage I'm in an airport I'm in the middle of nowhere or somewhere or if I'm between nowhere and somewhere I can pull up Shopify on my phone and see what's going on. And Shopify has this new AI assistant called Sidekick. It feels like a little robot intern that actually cares.

1:05:12It helps you figure out your next move, gives you reports, edits images, even throws you content ideas. It's like they got a little wizard in there making everything smooth. So if you're ready to build your own empire, whether it's merch, a new product or the next best idea get on shopify.com slash T-H-E-O and make it happen that's shopify.com slash Theo yeah I think it would be fun to like teach a kid something cool you know if I had me a little kid I think I would do homeschooling if my wife wants to do homeschooling I would be for it but I don't want the homeschool kid that stays at home and never meets any kids even on the weekend or whatever.

1:05:55I'm going to set your ass up. Let me think of who I can set you up. You are? I'm going to set you up. Oh, yeah. Thanks. What's your type? Woman. Just a full-grown woman. Yeah. I mean, yeah, obviously. But, yeah, adult woman. Adult woman. Positive attitude. Warm eyes. Wants to be a mom. Okay. What else? Hard worker. Okay. Right? So, a nurse. I think I would like, but I think I may just say that because of hard worker. Yeah. But. Okay. I got to pray a little bit more about it too and just help get my kind of sights lined up, you know, let the Lord kind of. I'm going to tell you right now. He can.

1:06:39Yeah. He can. I'll be praying for it too. Yeah. Thanks. Because you can meet people, but you got to like, you know, you just got to meet the right one. That's right. You just got to be patient too. That's right. And he'll make it clear. he always does and I always heard that wah wah wah about you know when you know and all this stuff but like I do believe it now did you make like a little list list or alter or whatever an alter I made a list of like I went through some doozies I'm talking about like stuff I'm embarrassed about now you know what I'm saying I'm sorry God bless you but embarrassed to think that I let somebody do me that way yeah and then uh and then met somebody who just would never in a million years but I did like I took a few years to myself didn't even go on a date like but also nobody asked me out either like wouldn't nobody ask me out and um but those years were like really important for me and I figured out I'm like okay like no more playing around like I'm I'm the next person I'm dating like it's got to be I'm not gonna spend a few years of my life with this person if it's not like going in the direction that that it's supposed to and um so I was like okay yes I want somebody who is like you just said like hard working and I hate to say that this is even a quality on my list but loyal you know that It should just be.

1:08:14It should just be. Yeah. You know, it shouldn't be a quality. It is kind of true. We've gotten to a sad place. I know. That I'm going to be their only spouse. Yeah, I would love to be their only spouse. But yeah, I think write it down. Yeah, I just have to be more intentional about it, you know? I've done some of that, but I want to do even more of it. Because I want to see how fine-tuned could you get that arrow, you know? if you really locked in with some intention. But I do notice myself not spending time, like a lot of times, like wasting it in areas, you know, or trying not to spend my time wasting it in certain areas, you know.

1:08:54Yes. It's just kind of like cutting the crap. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that's a big step right there. Right, is you deciding, yeah. Is just being like, just no more. I want something. And then only the real thing can find you at that point. Yeah. You're going to find somebody She's going to be badass She better be I'll tell you I'm already pissed at her a little Are you? Yeah Yeah I'm mad at her too Thank you I've got a couple notes in my phone I'm texting her right Whenever I get her number That's it Because I'm definitely She's going to have to be I'm just trying to like Envision what this chick Is going to be like She better work out of town Sometimes I'm telling you that Okay because I don't want her messing my house up.

1:09:44That's it. That's it. That's it. I think the big thing I realized, I want to be able to have kids that have like a nice, like emotionally well upbringing. So that's what I need, like an emotionally well woman. Yes, just a good girl, like just well-rounded. Yeah, we'll find it. Maybe she has a couple animals or something. Or we could get some animals because sometimes you meet a woman, they already got too many animals. You could see they're trying to do their own little zoo or something. Yeah, put that horse in the front yard on the front porch, you know. That's how y 'all going to live. Well, that was my old way to meet a woman, just put that horse in the front yard, you know.

1:10:23But I'm not doing that anymore. Now the horse needs to go in the back. But I can't live like that anymore. What else? You have a movie that's coming up? Is that true? Yeah, Reminders of Him. Reminders of Him. Reminders of him, Colleen Hoover. And I will say I'm very excited about it. It was an opportunity for me to kind of dip my toes a little bit into being something other than a musician, which was fun. One of you done in some Yellowstone, right? Yeah. Was this more like extensive than that or like what was different about it? This, you know, it probably took me three or four days to like film my part.

1:11:08And I feel like with Yellowstone, because I was in like several different episodes, it was probably like a little bit more filming. But I had fun. I had fun. Like, I feel like I kind of like found myself within the character, you know, like I realized that, OK, maybe like I don't have to be playing music to feel like I can play the character. Dang. Which is cool. Like, I'm like, who knows? Who knows? I want to do a comedy. do you god that would be good you'd be so good at it we should make one then let's do it me and david spade wrote a movie it's almost done i can't talk about it anymore on the podcast because we've talked about it on too many episodes but we're editing it right now but is that so fun it was the editing itself's a nightmare but it's fun got it it's like a puzzle you're like figuring out okay we got to move this here how do we move this what do we do so it's probably like putting a record together yeah yeah it's been a big learning experience it's been good i think but yeah you definitely start to see like oh i could do more of these or figure out how to do it or create different ones like funny ideas yep are you gonna start like a festival back at home or anything do you think you thought about that we've talked about it i mean we've um like do you feel like you have to i guess it becomes like a thing i definitely like would love to be able to do something specifically like for my community you know what i'm saying yeah um yeah just you know just to like bring in some more people, some more fans.

1:12:34And like just even last year we played a couple shows in Monroe back to back. And I heard, you know, that a lot of people had lots of business that week. And that's important. I want people to flourish and do well. Like this is the community that believed in me before anybody did, you know. So I would love to do something like that at some point. But it takes a lot of like I want to do it right, you know. Oh, yeah. It's got to be right. Yeah. You want to definitely have some crawfish trucks out front. Crawfish trucks. That'd be it. I wonder what your festival would be called if you had a festival over there.

1:13:13I don't know. What would it be called? I don't know. You got to think. I mean, it's got to be like a neat critter that's from the area, I guess, kind of. I mean, it could be the Laney Wilson Festival. No, there's something cooler. Well, there's something probably that has a little more critter in it. Yeah, we definitely need a critter. Yeah. I mean, you have a decent amount of critter, it seems like. I'm not trying to un-critter you or whatever. You kind of un-critter, mate. I didn't think I could. Dude, did you ever go on, like, I remember you told me that you went on this horrible date one time.

1:13:42It was like a Valentine's date. Remember when we made a little cartoon about it? Oh, roses are red, violets are black. Why is your chest as flat as your back? But, dude, it reminded me. So one time when I was a kid, I stole my mom's car, bartered, whatever you did. You know, you're like 13. and this girl down the street dude had she was just looking pretty good you know and she was like willing to sneak out of her house at night right so i was like was she the same age yeah same age so i was like i'm gonna go pick her up and we're gonna go out to this like boat launch area that you can park the car out there and dance a little bit and put on some country music put on some top 40 or whatever you know they play some strawberry wine or maybe some I'm trying to think of whatever else.

1:14:27Maybe some John Michael Montgomery. Let's go. You know, something that'll just keep my eyes open, you know? So anyway, pick her up. And this girl always wore like a two-piece bathing suit because she was on the swim team at school, right? So anyway, but I don't even know why I said that. But anyway. Well, I needed the visual. Yeah. Anyway, picked her up. We go out there. We're listening to some music. A car comes across the parking lot, goes into the water and starts to sink, right? We're the only people. You are lying. Swear. We're the only people out there. It goes right off the boat launch.

1:15:00And then starts to sink. And the headlights are up towards the top of the water. The car sinks. You are lying. No. And it's me and her. And I'm like, oh, my God. I'm out here. We still want. I can't call the police. What do I even do? I'm going to get in trouble. Right. So jump in the water. We run right over there to the thing. And I was like, we got to get we got to do something. You know, what if somebody's in there? Like we were the only people out there. and she's like okay on the count of three we'll jump in and i'm like dude you don't do the count of three dude if somebody is drowning in a car you know what i'm saying like that is the one two yeah you don't you don't waste people's time that are drowning if you can just jump in right so anyway she goes i was like all right she's like no we have to do it i was like all right she goes one two three i jump she doesn't even jump you are lying and she's a swimmer she's a swimmer and i'm not that great of a swimmer that's a life lesson right there oh yeah yeah that's what i'm saying that's why you need to pick a woman who is willing to go that extra mile that's it because there's a lot of these fake ass swim team bitches out there but anyway moving on anyway i reached down in the car i get underwater reach down in the car and i feel like the car seat and stuff and um they had like one of those like covers on the car seat that was like that fur you know You know they had the white fur seat cover sometimes It was like It wasn't like Dalmatian it was something nice Or light It was fake probably But anyway yeah something like that Wolf or something And so I touch it And that scared me so much I didn't know if it was somebody So I start kind of vomit Like underwater I'm like getting sick Get back up above the water Now I can't hold my breath to go down Like the car is completely underwater so get out we run back to the car drive to this bar that was close by and we started just like we ran inside and we're like this car went off into the water there's like six people in this bar they all clear out of there and then they all run down to they'll uh drive down or run down to this to the dot and people are jumping in the water saying some lady's name or something got in my mom's car left so you don't know what happened Left one There was somebody in there Wasn't it I don't know But How did the like News not come out In the town or anything I mean We were kids I don't think we would have Heard it probably Because it was like It was more adult stuff So Did your mama ever know That you took the car She does now She does Sorry mama Almost saved that woman mama And if you'd have let me Borrow your freaking car Went out of freaking ass I probably would have Been able to save her I wouldn't have to sneak back home.

1:17:42But yeah, I think that was something. I'm still thinking about the girl not jumping with you. Oh, it's unbelievable. You can't say on the count of three and then not go. And who has time to do count of three? Somebody's drowning. You're like, all right, one, two. You don't do that. I don't know whatever happened to her. Dude, there was a beautiful girl in my town that kissed me one time by a fire and then I never, ever, ever saw her again. That's how it goes. God. Uh-huh. I wonder where she's at. You remember her? I don't know. Yes, I remember her. We need to get in touch with her. And she let me brush her hair for almost 15 minutes out there.

1:18:15You literally just had a brush and you were just combing her hair. She brought it. I'm not that creepy, yeah. But I would, yeah, I helped her out. That was my 4-H. That was your 4-H. It was. What is this? Oh, did you see Justin Bieber showed up, this fake one? What are you talking about? They had a fake Justin Bieber showed up the other night. To where? In Las Vegas, and everybody thought that it was him. I'm like, this does not even seem like him. No. It seems like Chet Hanks just had a long weekend, kind of. What in the world? But there were literally, I guess, like thousands of people following this guy.

1:18:54Watching everyone get scammed is wild. So many people get scammed nowadays. I just saw the other day that we're at one of the biggest scamming times. What are some of the biggest online scams? have they had any have they had any Laney Wilson impassinators oh my god I mean I don't know about like dressing up like that and whatever but I'm just talking about like online in general like the amount of messages I get about oh tickets scamming all that stuff well just like people who think that they are like actually in a relationship with me and stuff because like somebody's pretending to be me and so it's it's really bad I've ruined a couple marriages on accident didn't even mean to you didn't yes I sure did good.

1:19:37Lainey. Yeah. They're like, my husband of 30 years believes he's talking to you and this and that and whatever. Yes. And I'm like, oh no. And what do you have to do then? You can't call them. There's literally nothing like, there's nothing I can do. I'm just, besides like telling y 'all about it, you know? Yeah. If you are not married to Lainey Wilson, you are not married to Lenny Wilson. So that's... Well, you think it ought to be that simple, but I mean, I've heard all kind of stuff. I was... I mean, one woman got scammed by a buddy of mine and she showed up to the show, had her bag packed and everything and was just waiting there.

1:20:17Nuh-uh. Like, I'm going with him. And they were like, no, ma 'am. But she had been communicating with somebody online. And thought it was him. And thought it was him. Dang. So... It's getting that real. But I guess I would be shocked. How could you think it would go that real online? You know? It's like a certain, what I've noticed is it's like a certain age group of, it's probably like lonely, lonely people. Right. Whether they're married or not, they're lonely. Right. And I don't know. It's just like, they just find like the right person. They must try it to a million people to find the right person to actually convince, you know, and, and they're asking for money and they, they just, give them lots of money.

1:21:01Lots of money. And it's sad. It is sad. I guess I'm trying to give somebody email me and said I am I'm trying to think of somebody that would really have me just fired up probably. Can't even think of anybody off the top of my head. Probably like a night nurse or whatever, like a ICU nurse. Uh-huh.

1:21:30No, that's not it. It'd have to be somebody you know publicly probably. Somebody that you'd be like, I can't believe they're messaging me. God, yeah. Who could that be? Like a Pamela Anderson. Yeah, one of the Spice Girls or somebody. One of the Spice Girls for sure. Ginger or Baby Spice. Yeah, or Marjoram or whatever. Isn't that one? Sporty Spice. Oh, Scarlett Johnston. Who else? Johnny Depp. That's a man. I don't know. None of these people are doing it for me. Maybe Tom Hanks. Yeah, if Tom sent you an email. Look, Tom, one of the best actors in the world. But if he said, Theo, I'm in a bind.

1:22:11Yeah. And I need$200 ,000. Because that's the crazy amount. It's not just like, hey, I need$100. Right. People are getting screwed, glued, and tattooed. I would not say that. I would send him maybe$1 ,200. I am not sending it. Say, God bless you, Tom. Yeah, I'm not sending somebody. That much money is crazy. Yeah, I don't know what goes into the psychology of that. We should talk with somebody and learn about that. What is one of the biggest scams that's happened online with somebody? But, I mean, that one with Justin Bieber is crazy. Are people thinking that that's him? Like, I remember, like, Kip Moore got scammed, and there was, like, a Dr.

1:22:49Phil episode about it. I'm not Kip Moore, but somebody was getting scammed by somebody pretending to be Kip Moore. And it was just like the girl really thought she was, you know, in a relationship, like for real, for real. I'll have friends that will send me stuff. It's like, oh, is this you? And it's like a fake email or something. It's like, that would be insane if that was me. Like if you read through this, you know, it had like recipes for things I like for dinner. So I'm like, who do you think I'm going to send something like that? But I guess, yeah, people get caught up. I mean I've fallen for stuff When I was growing up Ponzi, sheen Stuff like that So I guess we've all fallen for something I was trying to buy A French bulldog You were bit by a French bulldog?

1:23:26No I was trying to buy I was trying to buy one He's got good taste I'll say that It's an old French bulldog And I got scammed Nuh uh This was probably about six years ago God Now that is not cool Because they're really cute And you see them And you just wanted them and did you see pictures or they also had videos of him it was just pictures i mean i'm a dumbass for thinking that like i've learned a lot that was definitely my thought really thought it was jelly roll ohio man says he was scammed by ai video of the singer a springfield ohio man said he lost money i really thought it was jelly roll uh appeared to be from a celebrity that happens to be a fan of.

1:24:10The message said he won$50 ,000 on a brand new car. I want to see it. Then the account sent a video of the man who appears to be singer-songwriter Jelly Roll asking him to cover shipping to get his prizes. They're not linking to the video, but this is the image from the AI-generated video. That is insane. That's the thing, Theo. Like, used to, you had to be like, I got to see it to believe it. Right. But now, you just got to figure out yourself. You got to have that wisdom and discernment whether or not to you believe it or not i mean there's been stuff in the past month going on about like me and duck having a baby getting married they gave me six fingers on one hand yeah oh and you say you're cheating when you're doing your songs or whatever yeah and then like they put my daddy in a hospital bed picking his guitar and i was i was in a wedding dress in the hospital room because i had to go to him to get married and then i showed my daddy the picture and um and he's like not pissed about just ai making that rumor up he's like i got more hair than that i'm like really that's what you gotta say i got more hair than that hey look if you got it you got to keep it that's right that's it dang yeah i guess everything's getting weird out there yeah but have you met any actual impersonators of you there is um there's a girl in london And that actually puts on, she teams up with this guy who I believe does Luke Combs.

1:25:41So it's like her and her name is Georgie, I believe. They just like put on these like co-headlining shows together, which is really cool. It's like a, there she is right there. That's pretty cool. The Laney Wilson experience. She's awesome. And she's got the dance moves and everything down. Like she does Laney Wilson better than me. She does. That's got to be pretty flattering. I'm like learning some stuff from her. You know what I'm saying? she's got the whole outfit and everything

1:26:11wow yeah it's pretty cool oh that's awesome pretty cool that's pretty cool look she does a cowgirl of a night she like she's just got it going on I'm proud for her that she's like you know making a job out of it like yeah seems like a fun job oh that's pretty special right there yep Yeah, my niece's first show that we went to together was your show over there in Baton Rouge. I think it was probably two years ago. We're about to be back in Baton Rouge. Y 'all are? Yeah. Well, I'm about to have to come. Yeah, come on. I'd love it. We're going to be there in September. Tell your family, come on. God, I want that.

1:26:50Oh, my mom's down there now. She would come. Yeah? Yeah. Tell her to come on. I'll bring her. Come on. Thank you. I'll have to. Oh I saw that they just opened up Your Exhibit at the Country Music Hall of Fame Yes Did you go see it yet? I did go see it It was wild My mama kept everything She kept my baby blanket She kept this little like plastic star That went like on the wreath The day I was born And it said a star was born today You're lying No So they were betting on you They were like She gotta do it Lord help us God honey yes it's so cool because i really got to like kind of zoom out and you know it looked like a bunch of tiny little steps like everything i've done since i was just young and then like me in person ain't hannah montana all that stuff that's my journals i wrote tim agraw a letter when i was 18 and was like all i need is a shot and i can do the rest you did and i still have never met to McGraw.

1:27:53Wow. I think I need to send him the letter now. Well, I think you guys will probably make a movie sometime soon. I'd like that. But yeah. Is that you right there? That's me. My God. That's me on a good day. I thought that was your stunt double from England again. That's Georgie. Yeah, that'd be so good. You start sending her to spend time with your family. I mean, honestly. They might like her better than me. Lainey, that's so cool. It's cool. And that's in the Country Music Hall of Fame? Yes. It's like, everything I've like ever done it for me like being able to look at it with my parents and I mean because they worked their butt off so I could do what I was doing and they when I tell you Theo they believed in me they they're they're the kind of people who are they're real realistic you know what I'm saying right like people don't those kind of things like don't happen in our area but for some crazy reason they're like no this is what she gonna do like this is like we know it and they helped me do whatever I mean whether it was like helping me buy my camper trailer or um if there was like a singing competition somewhere in another state or whatever I was like wanting to sign up for it and like mama would take me and um daddy would pay for the gas you know like it was just like a team effort so it's cool just to see everything come from it And it's just awesome.

1:29:19Yeah, well, parents just want to be proud of their children, right? And so I think, you know, and parents get proud of their children if they see them do something small or big, I think, you know. And so I'm sure even just to have something like that where so much of your child is kind of like recorded and has some, you know, in a museum. That's damn bad. I know. I said I ain't never been more proud that my mama was a hoarder. Yeah. But she kept it. Oh, that's beautiful. They were trying to send this tractor tire swing that we used to swing on. I'm talking about this tractor tire swing. It was like this big around.

1:29:54They're like, no, we don't need that. My dad's like, no, y 'all take it on up there. They're just trying to clean up the house. Yeah, that's what they're doing. Yeah. There's this stack of your dad's old pants. You're like, what the hell is this? No, just take them up there to Nashville. The exhibit just morphs into a garage sale. what um i know your bell-bottom pants i remember being at your show and seeing all these like uh girls and some men wearing different kind of laney bottom style pants right do you have a brand that's pants now or like is that become like a thing so i actually have a um partnership with wrangler which is so much fun because we get to do like we have like our fall collections and then we'll have some stuff for the winter and then we do spring and summer it's just fun it's like another way for me to be creative but we actually just launched a boot line too called golden west and really was inspired from really just like when i think of songwriting and how i've kind of learned how to write a song i feel like i've been given the opportunity to write with such incredible writers they've kind of taught me how to step into other people's shoes and like tell a story from their perspective um yeah oh there we go there they are there's the somewhere over laredo boots those top two right there are our best sellers right now really yep it's fun people are wearing these little boots now what is that called that little boot a shorty that's a shorty shorty yeah i've been seeing those we're gonna find you a nurse and we're gonna get her a pair of boots Yeah.

1:31:31We're going to hook her up. A couple Appaloosas right there. Uh-huh. Heck yeah. And tell her she can take them boots on out of town if she don't keep it together. Never mind. She can come back at least once. Okay. That's what I'm saying. At least once. Golden West. Oh, I like those. Yeah. They got some different styles. We're excited. And it's doing really well already. And I'm just excited to continue. continue are they only online or people can get them in some stores too um only online right now so okay yep and then we're just gonna continue like dropping you know dropping some and and see what happens but it's going in a great direction how do you start to feel about your that you have the possibility to think that your best songs are still ahead of you you know i know with comedians you start to think like man i'll never have a bit that's as good as that you know um how does that affect an artist like what's that like for you in your world i mean because you've had some you know you have a lot of great music you've had some that have been bigger hits than others that's just the way it goes but do you does that like what is that like do you have fears like that ever you know i mean it's absolutely like crossed my mind because i think just like being human in general that probably crosses everybody's mind you know even like getting out of a relationship like i'll never love anybody else as much as you know but i think uh I keep like shocking myself or like surprising myself and being like, well, he ain't done.

1:32:59I really do feel like we're really just getting started. Like even the songs that I've been writing in the past six months for the next record, I feel like we keep leveling up and I don't really know how that happens, but a grace of God. So he's delivering. Amen. Yep. Yeah, I believe it. I think, yeah, it's those moments because there's days where you'll feel like, okay, everything is being perfect. I'll feel this way. Everything's on the right path. And there's days where I feel like, man, I'm on a detour right now, you know. I know. And I think just trying to like tune, like almost like you're using a tuner for a radio dial to try to tune my heart in, you know.

1:33:39That's right. It's like positioning yourself. I'm learning that. Yeah. It's like positioning yourself so you can be. and also like getting rid of the things in your mind that are like stopping you or preventing you from finding whatever that next like great joke is or great song you know what i'm saying like you got to get rid of those roadblocks in order to to find them yeah and sometimes the roadblocks are people sometimes it's just like a sometimes it's yeah a damn roadblock it's an actual roadblock literally and you're just sitting there waiting for them to turn the sign around you know you just but no you're right sometimes it's people sometimes it's uh a habit a habit dude a habit how many people have not had made certain amazing things happen because of a bad habit probably god i know it's that's oh i just want to get tuned in just the lord fm honey that's what i see it the lord fm uh just reset let me know when that's the station because i'm gonna i'm gonna tune in too.

1:34:45Reset my dial. Tell Mr. Hodges we said hello. I will. Yeah, appreciate it. Come see us. Yeah, I'm going to try to come see you down there in Baton Rouge again. That would be great. Cool. And yeah, thanks for all the beautiful music. Congratulations and thanks for coming and just chatting with me about Louisiana. Thank you. Yeah. This is fun. Oh yeah, congratulations, Lainey Wilson. Best of luck. Yeehaw. Now I'm just floating on the breeze and I feel I'm falling like these leaves I must be Cornerstone Oh, but when I reach that ground I'll share this peace of mind I found I can feel it In my bones But it's gonna take