S3E10: The Energetics of Personal Branding & The Law of Attraction

0:00Welcome to Brand You, the ultimate personal branding podcast. I'm Caz Grant. And I'm Toby Lee. Together, we're here to help demystify personal branding. And to make it accessible and effective for everyone. Follow along as we guide you through creating your own personal branding journeys. So, let's get started. Let's Brand You.

0:26hey everybody welcome back to another episode of the brand new podcast proudly sponsored by spark house today we're going to be talking about personal branding and the law of attraction which i know toby is very excited about right now i'm kind of sweating my head going like i feel like i have an idea we've just been talking before we started recording about what what this episode is going to entail um but yeah just talk us through what do we mean by by this as a general idea yeah so i know like half of our listeners straight away will be like oh my gosh law of attraction woo woo like switch off like bear with us bear with me on this one and this is a little bit like self-indulgent episode because i like really believe in this kind of stuff but once we tell you how it aligns to the personal brand and we go into some of these discussions some of it might click and you might be like ah ah like that's why it's disconnecting a bit so we're not just thinking think good vibes and good things will happen are we that's not what we no no we're really getting down to like the energetics of everything and obviously like when we're talking about energetics like everything is energy but also like when we're putting stuff on social media or putting stuff out to the world if we're not aligned to that energetically and we're putting it out there people feel that and i can't get the science on it for you now and like tell you exactly why they feel that but they just feel like something is not right and when we're talking about personal branding and growing that know like and trust you're never going to get to that part if there's a disconnect happening between what you're sharing and your audience is feeling from you so that's what we're kind of talking about it in the fact of like personal branding but basically the law of attraction is like the energy that you put out to the world you will attract back but that can be in lots of different ways so the positivity side of it yeah if you are slightly more positive about things you are more likely to attract positivity back It's because what we focus on grows as well.

2:37So if you're focusing on the negatives of every single situation, your brain's going to pick up the negatives of every situation. We've got something in our brain, a part of our brain, called the RAS, reticular activating system. And that's the focus part of it. That's what focuses on. What we focus on grows because of our RAS. So if we're focused on finding negative things and negative situations things aren't going right for us we're more likely for more things not to go right for us okay yeah so that's the kind of positive spin on it but when we're looking at the law of attraction and energetics as well we're looking at like things like money and things like that like we're not going to attract more money to us more business to us more growth to us if there's if there's a like an off kilter there either so people are i don't know wanting to be hugely successful through their personal brands and grow into this hugely successful person but at their core they've got all this misalignment and money worries and like I'm not worthy of receiving this much money and everything like that and then it's like well money's not you're not going to get the success you're not going to have the money because you're repelling it right okay so it's mind-blowing like if you've not dived into the world of the law of attraction like dive into it a little bit and open your mind and expand it to it because it is so interesting so from a kind of outside point of view i'm kind of like listening to what you're saying and i'm probably where half of the listeners might be sitting as well in terms of going to me it also kind of sounds like that you're saying if what we're putting out say content wise isn't authentic is is is that what you mean like in in terms of if we're not just just using the example you use it of somebody with like money concerns um not saying we have to necessarily share that or talk about that that is going to impact our posts and our opinions on things and what we share yeah yeah absolutely absolutely so it's kind of looking at it from like i think the easiest thing is i guess to to look at it from a that success kind of point of view is all around success like if we're portraying ourselves online and not being as authentic and being you know that ego bigger than bigger than our boots kind of person we're really successful we're smashing business we're doing all of this inside you're like my bank is on zero yeah and it is really hard right now and it's really awful like there is gonna be that that mismatch so when we were talking in storytelling episode about you know maybe sharing some of the struggles and things like that that's how we connect and that's why it's so powerful because people can feel it yeah they know you're not that big boots guy that you're trying to portray to the world and sometimes maybe you need to practice that a bit and and do some things to make you eventually get to that level of success so maybe at the beginning you're not feeling quite like that which is fine yeah but then you know you try and show up on camera a bit more you try and show up a bit more authentically and share some of the struggles you do all these different steps and then suddenly at your core like your nervous system is just then that successful person it might so it might take the doing to get to that bit you know people with like people trying to fake their confidence online and you can kind of sense that a little bit can't you we're not saying don't do that at the start because you've got to do that to get energetically that confident and to come across like that but it's looking at really from your personal brand point of view is something not quite right with it at the moment is anybody out there feeling like well I'm not getting the right opportunities to me the right doors aren't opening for me the right clients aren't coming to me and And the clients that I do get, they're not the ones that I want, that have got the money that is needed for my services or whatever that is.

6:54And it's looking and it's thinking, hmm, if I take stock of this at the moment, like, would they, would I attract my ideal audience? Because am I energetically like them? Am I that kind of match to what they're looking for? because again if someone's going to spend a hell of a lot of money with you or something like you need to be pretty good at what you do and confident about it coming out there yeah there's a mismatch to that you're not going to get the money through yeah so yeah we just need it's just a different perspective for people to look at it because i think sometimes we push push push so hard for all the external stuff and the external validation the clients and the money and everything like that we don't get it yet because we're not there yet and I guess some people kind of see personal brand as being a front rather than actually something that is is just you communicating your brand yeah yeah I see a lot with visuals and photos of people who you know come across really confident and then you meet them and actually they're quite introverted and and, you know, sort of barely keep a conversation going, whereas you thought, you know, having seen them on LinkedIn with their photos and that, I thought they'd be really out there, you know, or vice versa, you know, somebody who perhaps their photos aren't doing their personality justice because when they walk in, they light up the room, they're the life and soul, but actually their photos are very reserved, you know.

8:28So when it comes to kind of like my job, I'm always trying to assess the person who walks in the door. sometimes it's quite useful if I've not actually met them or had too much conversation prior to a photo shoot because I'm going what's the impression I get from you instantly because that's what you need to be telling your audience this is who you are you know rather than um you know we can build you up and make you seem uber confident that's not how you walk in the door which probably thinking about it now comes back from doing actor headshots you know I don't want to make you appear really bubbly and confident and bold when actually when you walk in the room you just don't have that air around you when you're walking for an audition and that's a really important thing that casting directors have a finite amount of time to work with someone because they've got they've probably got 30 parts in this one production to cast yeah they're on to the next so um you know they've got to be sure that going off your headshot and they choose i want you to come in for an audition that you are going to be the person who walks it um also for you like it might be it might be annoying or sad or irritating if you don't get a certain role that you would love to get but if you're not a match to that role yeah oh that's yeah really how hard is that is that one job gonna be yeah like how exhausting how tiring you're not gonna feel right you're gonna feel like an imposter like you're probably not gonna love it while you're doing it either so becoming like an energetic match is also going to help you as much as it's going to help other people.

10:03Well that's essentially that's essentially sums up my acting career to be honest but it was exactly that I was pushing myself as something that the industry didn't see me as in terms of when I walked in the room I wasn't that kind of so I was thinking coming out of drama school that I'm the handsome you know I'm going to be the love interest, I'm going to be the main character and things like that. But you know that was built off growing up doing theatre and my mum saying, oh you know, aren't you so handsome? You know, and then you know, and grannies and things like that seeing my show and going, oh you're incredible and that you know, I was sort of nurtured with that.

10:46But the reality of it was, I'll share this with you just because it's fresh in my memory, I've just delivered a couple of workshops to the musical theatre students at the uni and um we're sharing it with them I remember my agents saying to me on the phone once saying uh you're actually more like the best friend I was gonna say that I was like okay he said you you're handsome but you're attainable so it's amazing how in as few words you can actually hit the nail right on the head and I had a moment where I sort of thought you know I can either be really bitter about this and be like I hate this industry I hate my agent I hate everything or go okay no actually if I embrace this there's a real learning to come from this that actually the energy I give you know I'm not the you look at any Netflix romantically now you know they're really tall, massive bicep, six pack, do you know what I mean?

11:43I understand. I am not that. I'm not giving off that. And it's very easy when we bring it back to kind of personal branding to be so consumed about what we want to be seen as, which is usually... Or what we think people want to see us as. Yeah, great point, yeah. Or as the world wants to see us as. Or Stephen Bartlett's doing this, so I want to. Elon Musk is doing this, so I want to. Like, trying to be other people. emulate them and we kind of have to do that to an extent like you know we take influences and we'll try things yeah but yeah until we fall on what actually is is real and true to us so yeah i totally get that yeah um and that was a great way of like explaining it with the acting and going from roles there because many of us probably haven't been in the acting world but you can we can take that in on board for anything can't yeah it's the same and it just wouldn't i bet once you flipped that to the best friend kind of thing and you went for those kind of roles again I bet it was a more enjoyable process going for them more enjoyable processes at the interviews and the auditions more enjoyable playing the parts because it fits and everything kind of locks together and even even being able to communicate and sell myself in terms of saying this is the kind of stuff I do you know bring it back to your business like if you're really aligned with everything it's so easy to talk about like there's no you know so with photography now I completely wholeheartedly understand why I do this um you know there is something in the way I work with people that at the end of it you'll feel better about yourself that's my kind of like core mission um and the acting background with that casting side I feel like I'm now looking at individuals and helping them on that journey of going, let's make sure you don't fall down the trap of being represented wrong or misunderstanding what it is that you're trying to say to your audience.

13:43For example, a lot of time people say, oh, I hate getting my photos taken, I really don't want to get this done. And I sort of flip it sometimes and say, well, don't be so selfish. It's not for you. These photos aren't for you. This is for your audience. This is for your audience to look at you and go, wow, I want to work with that person. Don't they look great? and as soon as you kind of flip it and go okay yeah it's not about how I look in the photo and it's not about the whole world either it's about the people that would want to work with you so your section of the world as well so we're not trying to please everybody yeah we're trying to be in more alignment with who we are use our uniquenesses and superpowers yeah and extend them to the world because then everything just sort of aligns and just works easier and better and feels better as well and i guess it goes back to like the other episode that we talked about the other day with the person not feeling proud of what they were doing again if they don't feel proud at the moment then maybe they shouldn't create a personal brand in a way because yeah would they be coming across not in the right way and they might not want to share some of the authentic right ways because they're not at that stage yet so maybe some people need to hold back off of some things I don't know it's interesting isn't it but it all goes back to the clarity part having clarity first before you're sharing anything online and just really understanding yourself so much more because we are all different but we're all amazing and incredible human beings at certain things half of us don't even know what those are and half of us don't even know then what those are that we've currently got but there may be ones that we want in the future based off of our goals and then what we can do to bridge that gap because our energetics is something that's happening now and it's who we are now but we're human beings like we can grow and evolve and develop and get better and change ourselves like neuroplasticity is a real thing like we don't have to stay static anymore i know like our parents or grandparents can't change they're in that fixed mindset aren't they we're not in that fixed mindset anymore so we can grow into and go along that journey it's not to say that if your energetics are off now and you're not attracting that kind of thing that you want now you can never do that it's like no hold on you're not going to right now because you're not quite there what do you need to do to get there and i think there's been i feel like i've been off energy with it all for for quite a while and coming from a military background i think i definitely pushed and forced my way through like the military world because it was like to almost prove myself and to keep up with the boys and there was lots of things I was so uncomfortable with I was just pushing through because I you know I was in that world in that vortex and since coming out it's like it's been like 10 years of like oh my god like what is I'm allowed to do things that are a bit more in alignment with me oh brilliant what are they yeah am i yeah interesting it's so interesting i think this is a great episode to come at this time of year as well because i think we get to this year this part of the year the end of the year we look back and we take stock on what's been working and maybe what hasn't and we've got that period over christmas and new year where we can go hmm what's working what's not who am I at my core yeah what would move me in more alignment to what I want to be doing and who I want to be in my life I was actually chatting to someone in the changing rooms at the gym last night and um we were talking about like not understanding ourselves and not knowing ourselves as much and it's like how many people out there are like that and then and then we're on the brand new podcast we're saying Percy Brand and show up and get in line they're like yeah great because I'm doing this and I'll do that and that and it's like brilliant and they do that and it's like something's still not working it's like well because is that really you is it really you and is it really what you want yeah is it really what you want is it what your family wants what your friends want what you've seen other people have and want what you're picking up on social media or is it your nervous system core being wants that's interesting yeah it's a deep dive isn't it it's a very deep dive a very deep dive but a good time of year to do it I think yeah definitely because I think people get lost into kind of new year's resolutions and this is where I want to go next year and that and actually sometimes they're not authentic or actually what we really want it's only because we're trying to achieve or strive for something that isn't realistic and how many new year's resolutions fail yeah because we're not that person and we don't actually want that thing so yeah we we want to you know start january and we all go to the gym we go to the gym anyway all year round but anyway people start in january it's a good it's a good analogy to use because most people start in january and then by the end of january they ain't at the gym anymore and it's back to normal people in the gym and nice and quiet again isn't it it's lovely but January everyone that goes to the gym before that is like god it's busy why are they all in the gym yeah yeah yeah but but when you're not it's like well actually again at your core do you see yourself as a healthy person are you a healthy person do you think that because if you don't think that you're not going to stick with the things and you might need to push through a bit at first to get to that point so you feel it and you are it but also there's different things like over the years I've found a few different things that I can do to move myself into that bracket as well and I think podcasts are a great thing nowadays because again we're training our brains to not be in that fixed mindset we're learning different ways from different people so if you're not a healthy person you want to be more healthy so you want a vibrant energetic great personal brand out there you're possibly not going to have a vibrant energetic personal brand out there if you're not a healthy person because you're not going to be energetic and vibrant you're not so there's that mismatch so maybe you have to work on your health for that so okay to work on your health you need to become someone who thinks they're a healthy person you're not going to just instantly do that you're going to have to maybe listen to some podcasts that get you thinking differently like oh i could do that you're going to have to look at the stories that you tell yourself i'm i hate the gym you're telling yourself you hate the gym in january you're not going to be there in February no you're not okay it might be uncomfortable at the moment you might not like it because you're not used to it but actually can you start telling yourself I'm excited to go to the gym today I wonder who I'll meet I'm looking forward to going to the gym today because it's going to help me become that vibrant energetic person you're not saying like affirmations like I am a healthy person and your brain's like no you're not you're saying I am on the road to becoming a healthy person and your brain's like yeah you are on the road to it okay so it's like what stories are you telling yourself as well if you want to have a hugely successful personal brand that's monetized and pulling in lots of money but internally you're like living in lack and you're like i money doesn't come to me money's hard money's a struggle like money doesn't grow on trees all of this stuff it's like hold on catch yourself saying some of those phrases because your your personal brand's never going to attract that for you because you don't think you can yeah so you're gonna have to rewire rewire and fire different neurons so that you actually become that person and then suddenly once it does sort of all click and come together and you have changed energetically into that person like someone will contact you through your personal brand a little bit like i've got an opportunity do you want to make 500 quid or whatever it is and it'll be like oh which just kind of came in it yeah because maybe making money isn't hard but it was a story that you were telling yourself and once you've rewired that story hmm possibilities price point and and altering your price is always an interesting conversation and somewhere most businesses get stuck don't they going you know i feel i need to shift my price point to here now my business is ready but i personally don't feel comfortable selling at that point so i won't do it i'll stay down here but there is something really liberating that when you confidently do do that and then you're not rejected people do want to buy into it or they might even be more influenced to you know because they're going to take your services seriously because you're costing this much not that much um yeah that that can that can really have a real positive kind of like snowball effect it's a bit like as well um excuse me it's a bit like as well like kind of like making purchases for the business there's that kind of old adage of like you know you spend money to make money and you know I can resist for ages not buying anything new and then go on a bit of a spending spree thinking you know I need to update this it'd be great to have that to add to my lineup of offerings and things and then sure enough the interest comes in whatever it is that's going to justify those purchases and that's one type of thing if I'd have never done that would those opportunities have come along or you know um is yeah so I can kind of relate to that.

23:39Because you wouldn't be energetically at that level to receive those. Yeah. Whereas if I made those purchases going oh I really can't afford to do this but I'm going to do it. Yeah. After that I would have just been bitter if nothing yeah yeah yeah yeah none of those big opportunities came in reticular activating system kicks in focus on i knew i wasn't gonna get anything from that kicks in oh it finds ways to say that it wasn't gonna get it of course it does that person rejected me that person didn't want that that person keeps saying no and then the more you feed into that negativity and that that narrative of you can't the more you can't yes and the more you're not speaking to the right people you're not taking the right opportunities up you ignore that dm that could have been a thing because you can't get that so it's like it's madness when you start thinking about it all but yeah also kind of empowering when you do when you start thinking I can change it yeah I'm not there now I'm not perfectly formed now I'm not attracting what I want to now because of some things that I need to change when I change them I could potentially then attract that and then it's like okay but yeah it's work isn't it it's extra work for everybody to change into that energetic match but podcasts reading things learning things developing yourself changing that mindset self-talk there's a good book out there called uh what to say when you talk to yourself it's quite like a little book but it's brilliant and and we've all got this internal dialogue and we're all repeating the same rubbish stories and I had all the time of how we can't.

25:14It just gets you thinking about actually, what can I change that and how can I change that to more I can? Because the people that you see that are successful, they're just the ones that have told themselves that they can, that it's a possibility when it's got hard, it's like, it's cool. I know this, I believe in this. I am an energetic match to it. It will come at some point in the right time, it will come so yeah it's an interesting subject and i hope we haven't put people off with this subject and indulging me on the law of attraction one but hopefully it's expanded some people's mindsets out there as well some people that maybe wouldn't dive into the law of attraction and now maybe a little bit more curious about it there's so much out there on the law of attraction and if you want to get really really woo woo go and google abraham hicks because that's even next level of law of attraction positive thinking and there's a good book that i've started reading at the moment also called ask and it's given and that's um all about the law of attraction as well um and again just gets you thinking a little bit of a different way um but yeah if you're starting a business or just want a space that helps you focus and grow then you will want to check out spark house at the university of lincoln it's right in the heart of the city with creative energy and practical support.

26:38They've got flexible office spaces, specialist business mentoring with physical tenancies and they even have virtual office options if you're not quite ready for a full-time desk. Having supported over a thousand businesses since opening, Sparkhouse has a track record for helping startups succeed. If you need an office space in Lincoln, email sparkhouse at lincoln.ac.uk and check out the show notes for that email address to get in touch. So today's action step, we want you to have a little think about your own personal brand. Are you attracting the opportunities that you want to attract through it as it is at the moment?

27:17And if not, that's completely cool, but have a little audit over these next few weeks and see, is there an energetic kind of mismatch anywhere? Do you need to work on the tone of voice on your visuals or anything like that to showcase yourself in a more congruent way and more aligned to who you actually are at your core that will then actually talk to your ideal audience and resonate with them we are on instagram so head over to at brand new podcast and give us a follow so you can keep up to date with all the latest tips from recent episodes and when episodes are dropping in the future and give us a subscribe on any of the platforms that you listen to us on and watch us on YouTube, Apple and Spotify.

27:58Thank you once again to Sparkhouse for supporting us with this podcast. Here's to branding new.