Smriti Mandhana On Controlling Emotions, Handling Pressure & Failures | FO561 Raj Shamani

0:00You've not been able to soak in the environment. Yeah, 2017 World Cup final. I was 8, 19 years old. I never knew what to do. I just went to bat. Saw that was first time women's cricket had 20 ,000 people. And that's my first match at Lord's. I went and the third ball was like, Thak, zero out. Till I realized what's happening, I was already out. You were not focused on the batting. You were focused on like, what's all this? I wouldn't say I was focused. It's just that even if you're not focusing it, I feel it's more than avoiding it. you should just embrace it. At that time I was avoiding it. Today's guest, Smriti Mandana, one of the biggest stars in Indian cricket.

0:37She opens up about the sacrifices behind success, bouncing back from failure, handling expectations and constantly pushing herself to become better. Okay, take me on the day of final match of the World Cup. You have to walk me through that day. Morning, see, I wake up for breakfast as usual. Everyone's family's were there. Indian cricket family went back. I did my mobility routine, ground, it's a walking distance that we stayed at. But I like 10 minutes drive to the stadium. So for D.Y. Patel matches, I used to start listening to songs on AirPods in Room only. What song do you like? I saw the Indian entry song.

1:13Tufan was my go-to song for a very long time. So first I enter, I like kind of see and I just try and soak it in and be comfortable around it. Because once you're comfortable, you just feel like, okay, it's your space. I have that routine, touch the ground. Go sideways twice, sideways just twice, three backflips. Look at the sun just near the 23 yards. Like just do that. You have a 30 minute rule, right? Yeah, it's a 30 minute rule. Like I wouldn't dwell on anything in life, not only cricket. Anything in life 30-40 minutes. Anything in life. Anything in life. I think I've got up, done. Let me name like top emotions.

1:48Then you tell me what do you feel about that. Like what do you think about anger? Just if you get angry, you could talk something which would hurt the other person a lot. So rather than hurting that person, just be quiet. What do you feel about sad as an emotion? For me, I feel I just go quiet for a very long time. I hate sympathy. Any sort of sympathy. If someone has been thinking about it, then I'm fine. Even if I've got out, I've had a bad World Cup. Don't look at me as a bichari girl. I don't like to portray myself. I'm strong. When was the last time you cried? Good question.

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3:31Okay, so let me show you two pictures. And you tell me what has changed. My hairstyle and my shape changed. My hairstyle and my shape changed. There you go. These are two different eras of Smriti. Okay. This is you when you started, but probably a little after that. And then this is you right now. Tell me just the differences and I'll write down. Oh. What are the differences between the KDU versus who you are right now?

4:08Interesting. I'm thinking, love batting, love batting. Don't tell me the similarities. We have covered that. maybe I was very organized and disciplined this person is not that organized and disciplined I see I you know somehow I prefer my younger self more than my self now why would you say so I feel I was a lot like a confident extra confident kid I had like I'll show you like you know I was a very I would fight with anyone and fight with anyone and I would like show the world like what it is kind of a person I was like fight with guys get my work done I'll see and you know I was again very organized disciplined very clean and neat and this person is not I wouldn't say he's doing the same thing now what has changed how is this person today not organized at all I try and be but see we are traveling 11 months it's so hard it's literally very hard to be very organized with your stuff you're packing you're literally living in a bag so you just crush everything in a bag no no no I pack properly okay but I wouldn't say like my room would be really really clean after a day or two like again it's not the worst I've seen like I've seen a lot of people who are worse okay but I'm not worse but this person was like if there's seven subjects that seven books lines say subject wise like iron your own uniform, polish your shoes and keep it.

5:49Like this was like ultra. I'm not saying I'm bad now but this was like too much of a perfectionist. So this is maybe not now. My mom only says that where did I go? So perfectionist, confident and what else? What deep questions are you asking? How basic questions are you asking? I don't even ask deep questions. Even if you speak to my friends, they would come and be like, you're doing a podcast with Smriti, are you mad? That time I'm using my brother's bat. I think it's just bad. It's not even my size. Look at my tiny hands and the bat size. This is my own bat made for me, especially with sponsors on it.

6:28It's a good change. It's a very good change. It's a good change for women's cricket. I feel it's not only a good change for me. I think it's a good change for women's cricket to have this virgin now. Yeah. and yeah i don't know i mean otherwise i think pretty similar like chill only even chill i'm still chill in life still scared of dude still scared of dude that's the similarity so you you pointed out three specific things okay clearly you wanted to win and you're winning you still want to win i'm sure that those things have not changed those things ambition will keep probably you're more ambitious now than you were because you must have realized the power of ambition and what you can achieve yeah yeah i believe in manifestation a lot and i believe i i think i watched the video like the secrets i don't yeah so i i am a big big believer of that i can't read a lot so i watched my mentor made me watch it who who's a mentor so amrita ma 'am was someone who kind of at that age when i was 13 14 kind of took me under her wings and yeah something she saw in me at that age i was very i was not ambitious at that time i would say i loved cricket i loved batting nicely enjoy chalo pandar visran maro enjoy karo jau her you know i didn't have like india khelna hai ye karna hai wo karna hai when she saw me and she saw that like i don't know what she saw in me but she was like no you're built for something else and all of that stuff and then she started teaching me the kind of right things to do in terms of fitness, fielding.

8:08She was very strict with me at some point of my life. And I would wake up at 5 a.m. Oh, she said that this was wrong. I would wake up at 5 a.m. Kampal Sari, I had to do 12 Surah Namaskars. My one fitness routine, she had sent it to me. Like 30 seconds squat jump. I was kidding. 30 seconds squat jump, 30 seconds burpees, 30 seconds mountain climber 5 sets I had to compulsory do it that was like morning then I start my stationery shadow batting all of those things and till 7.38 I had to do all of those things everyday day in day out for like 5 years and very diligently I did it I like never ever said like as I said someone makes me do it I'll do it and I was really really scared I should not upset her and in those 4-5 years she taught me all the right things in terms of like say leading a team as well she would make me sit down with a notebook watch Ash's test match wake up in the morning and just put down field sets watch me make me watch take me to ground and watch make me watch a live match and be like what's yeah no all those all those things and I had to tell her so like kind of the cricketing knowledge what I got is a lot from her and yeah she made me watch the video of secret made me do all of those things right like i am icc number one batter world cup winner all of that stuff put under the pillow sleeve have a blank check yeah i don't know if you've seen secret no tell me tell me all of this okay so what was what did you write and put it under the pillow what did you do as a kid you know you like she used to make me write icc player number one player like player of the year and all of the stuff batter of number one ranked batter which is pretty the best thing to achieve then world cup winner and yeah like there are three four exactly I don't like these are the main things I used to like write it on the whole page put it under the whole page like multiple times yeah multiple times like and then you have to like sleep with it it's all those and then you would put it under your pillow every day you would write it or just one time you write it every night this is all every night four five years I was a machine at that i and i still feel like if you work yourself right at 14 to 18 you're good like in life you would not maybe but you'll be doing something good in life so from 14 to 18 like 4 or 14 to 19 4 or 5 years you wrote a letter every day not a letter it's like a kind of a notebook which i had to write affirmations affirmations and then just like i'm gonna it's like it's already happened i am sorry i am this i am that not that it will happen yeah it is happened yeah so i had to believe that i was still i was playing state level and i'm like oh i am world's best pattern so i had to believe that okay i will i am going to be or i am already and then put it under the pillow and i used to find it so stupid and i still i don't know i still don't know why i did it but kind of a lot of things in that came true also so which is then I was like I don't have complaints about it but at that time it was it felt like oh papre kya bura hai ho ra hai meri saath but then yeah she thought me a lot of right values also like and what else would you do like ye ek thok hai manifestation letter bina ke rakha what is the other thing you were saying then I had to write goals that's why I still write goals I have like 7 day goal a week month goal like say if I'm developing a shot by end of 7 day I want to learn this shot or I have learnt this shot I have learnt this shot you always talk that it has happened it has happened you start believing and you start goal setting was a huge thing for her goal setting also you tried in a way that it has happened to you no goal setting was like more in a way where I want to get here okay yeah like seven days i want to get here two weeks i want to get here that was a lot at that time now i do maybe a monthly goal or a yearly goal i still do that because i just feel like goals are something which are the reasons you wake up and you have that desire to do and something like i don't remember what was it i had to like write a blank check and put it on our photo wall or something like that and see it every day and i don't know what what for what it was i was a kid too i was just doing what i was told to do like i don't know i i think you should see that secret or i'm sure you would have seen i'm sure you have seen it because it's a pretty famous thing but why would you write a blank check like why would you put a blank check i wanted to buy a house for them we were rented house that was the only aim of my life okay did you ever write that on your paper yeah i want to buy a house for my mom that because I saw my mom like really really work hard to make us where we are or get us to where we are so that I was always like are you tension with mommy I was like I'm telling you that kid was very like carefree confident like just imagine 13 year old telling his mom why tension I'm buying it for 4-5 years.

13:32It happened. Yeah. It's been 5 years. But it happened. Actually, I bought it at 17 only. Sweet. 18 actually. So, it was pretty cool. So good. Yeah. So, it was like a year later. But yeah. Nice. So proud. So, you would write that. I believe in, by the way, manifestation, visualization, all of these. I don't find them stupid at all. I don't. At that point, I found it very stupid because I was too short. but now i when i look back i just feel like yeah it was it was like very necessary like i feel like prepared for a lot of things but it's true and by the way every person every athlete specifically who i've met or have read about they used to follow these certain things okay like michael jordan michael phelps your jokovic everybody you name it and they have it like in women's if you look at right now alien goo she's killing it i don't know if you know her she's a women's ski player okay she's world famous right now master believer of master manifestation like you just name people and they all have some kind of ritual so it's not stupid at all I also still do it but not like the secret book but I do it in my own ways what is your way

15:02goal setting is a huge thing one month and one year and you have a long term goal as well I think I gave away that and do you have a goal attached to a timeline or just a goal and my goals are not to do with um so i've realized this is a big change i think that's a lot of big change which i had is i don't attach my goals to scoring a certain terms or runs of winning world cup or winning a specific tournament i think my goals are attached now to what i want to do in terms of how i how my day should look like or how my body should feel like or how my batting where i want my batting to be at give me an example like say like when two years back when i sat down and i was like okay i wanna change these things in the next 10 months i should stop eating sugar i have after that i should not feel like i've missed any sessions going into that tournament i have to feel like i have given everything i could even after this it doesn't work out it's fine i'll go back still work hard but i've given everything i could to get here as well so that's the feeling i wanted to get and yeah like so many things like like you just want to like say i i want to master a specific specific shot then i just feel like i'll give you give myself like that month or two and then i'll try to work work hard on that specific shot say i want to hit sixes at will which is not particularly my strength and then that's how then i will want to be at a month later that i want to do that and i i know that if i do that for a month i'll end up doing that on 31st day so interesting so yeah what what happens when you can't and when you don't achieve your work it's okay put my head down work harder that's cricket you know that's cricket which is taught me get out on zero get out on hundred just put your head down get back to work you get a hundred also you have to go back do your ice part do your recovery sessions next day morning you have to go still gym and get out on zero same routine so you know it's just i feel the goals are good but it's not like the end of the world like i really do everything possible to get there but if not it's fine i mean i i'll just be like okay where have i gone wrong that's a question which you need to ask yourself i ask myself then you know your answers mostly honest people honest to yourself people know your answer I think everyone knows their answer some people accept some people don't I think I have a very high acceptance of my own mistakes which is something which helps me a lot give me an example of the day where you made a mistake and tell me the mistake and then what did you do to fix it or something okay not every time but say sometimes you get out on 10 runs when you're batting extremely well and then you sit down and I'm like what should I play what happened and then you're like that mobility session you were lazy you didn't do that that is why you know you just you know you just know you just know and then it's like sometimes people would be like I did everything I did everything but there are some people who will be like I don't know I did everything so so I think I'm the second part of it like i wouldn't know that and what what was your biggest mistake let's say you said you were at the best time of your life you were in form and still didn't work out you stopped thinking about it no i did think in dubai world cup but i remember the time i started taking actions i forget what's happening okay so i've left the dubai world cup the next morning i called my manager and like I need this this things like you know we can't do these things now for the next whatever years I play cricket I can't be shooting before like I would give you like 7 day slaps and then we'll arrange our shoots I can't be like a mad dog like I'm a cricketer at the end like I wouldn't like like my training is more important than anything else like they always prioritized it but sometimes you know you you have this thing I don't know they have pushed push but you know i should not manage my shoot schedules earlier i would do zap time but now i got a lot more organized with that then i called him saying that i want the sort of people to help around me so that i sort myself up in in a way like training way nutrition way all of those things i made that call for 10 minutes and i said next seven days please get me these things and that was like the night we got knocked out next morning 7am I made the call I changed yoga and meditation or something which I was like literally running away from I was like no no I don't make it for me I'm talking what's different then I went I did yoga I did meditation it changed me a lot you do meditation?

20:10yeah I do meditation I do worked out yeah it did work out it calmed me down got me extremely calm in a very different way like not even like a surface level like it actually calmed me down quite a lot so that that big change I had to do and then once I made those changes for me then what's happened is not important for people who have like I feel like who have the fight to make that change then they won't dwell on the past mistakes like if you keep crying and sitting on those mistakes it's i feel is what are you getting out of it you're not getting you're not improving yourself you're not getting better so so yeah that's one thing which like for me i never dwell on something for a very long long period of time and what happens like you're saying that you were in the form of your life and you're playing cricket really well and yet then you couldn't perform and you got knocked out like what happens when you're in form and you still can't make runs like what is there what changes in your body and changes in your approach because you hear this a lot right like this person was in zone but see he can't perform or she can't perform and we are watching from the tv and we are like yeah we were banking on her and she's not performing what goes on in your head is it the pressure that because i've been playing so well i need to play and then that messes up what is it yeah that's one part of it because you kind of build up that tournament in your head in a very different way and then you're just like okay i have to do i have to do i can't get anything wrong by till here i can't get anything wrong so what have started happening was i i think i started getting really hard on myself with these sort of things where I need to do this, I need to do this, I need to do this.

22:01I can't go wrong in these things. And again, as I said to you about my batting, like I'm such a mad perfectionist around it that if it's a little bit there, then I start messing up a lot more in my head. Even more if it's a bigger tournament coming. And then it kind of deteriorates a little more. so so yeah I think more than the pressure pressure to see as cricket as if you are batting well match big match it's a it's a first 4-5 balls thing okay like after first 4-5 balls you wouldn't feel it a lot like you know like when you like first 4-5 balls is the time where you are kind of because bigger the match it's not the match day which is it feels pressure the approach towards the match the night before that the morning before that is when you start if you're stressing about it but once the match starts and the first three four balls happen you're not saying oh this is the biggest match of my life you don't think all those things you know it's only the first four five balls where you have that jitters and nerves and if i would get out in the first four five balls i would have been like yes i have to work on my jitters.

23:22But I would never get out on the first 4-5 balls. It was after that. That means the solution and all is not jitters or big pressure. It's something different. Interesting. Like, you know, if you go and first ball you get out in a big match. Yeah. I would say, okay, maybe that is pressure. Yeah, that's anxiety. Anxiety, nervousness, nerves. Jitters, yeah. You played first 5-6 balls like whatever, in whichever nerves you have, you've played it. You've got to the grip. After 6-2 ball of your innings, you're not like you're not thinking about match occasion as much in your head you're just thinking batting the next ball so I don't think it was ever to do with the pressure or anything for me it was more to do with the build up for the tournament in my head then overthinking around it and then losing my feel overthinking about it and then as a batter when you're not feeling the way you want to feel because of what my batting is it's more like a touch batting it's not power batting so if you don't feel the way you do it doesn't come in results it's very hard walk me through the day like walk me through the night before what was going in your head no no you said you were overthinking pressure stuff like that overthinking that I also said overthinking night before you can't do it this is when you have like 7-8 days and say if I am batting extremely well I don't even think yeah I have a little bit in the night session I have a little batting then I'm like oh what's happening what's happening what's happening what's happening because it's such a weird thing batting can't go never never it's like can't go again it's not a form it's again how you are your body is feeling sometimes your bottom hand is tight and for feel and touch players it's very important for me at least it is very important so so yeah there were 7 days and then I start thinking a lot about it then I go back to the room and I'll think a lot about it try and change something and then something else happens then next day it's even worse batting then the same that the chain happens until i approach the tournament it's gone so i at that time now of course i have said that it is okay it is fine don't overthink it's in last two years i think i've got that right so even if i'm not feeling fine it is okay this one two words three words is has changed a lot for me is it same in the world cup as well yeah or is it a little different because you're the final match world cup night there will be some extra thought or extra pressure in your head or no i'm like no there's just another day

26:05okay let's let's do like take me on the day of final match of the world cup let's say um you have to walk me through that day like as if i'm there and tell me what happened when you wake up what did you do what was the first thought who did you meet the team ritual breakfast like walk me through the entire day with details when you wake up and you realize it's a big match day a little bit maybe if your heart is racing at 65 it will race at 75 come that day take me like don't don't tell me what like tell me morning say i wake up for breakfast as usual okay so you woke up at nowadays we have an afternoon and evening matches okay go to world cup final I think we went to I went to breakfast everyone's families were there at DIY party right so at breakfast it felt like it's our floor everyone's mom dad's like literally it felt like one big Indian cricket family when I was here it was pretty cool like till I went till the breakfast I just felt like oh and then I saw everyone I was just so very happy about it What was the first time before?

27:10What was it you said? Like I just woke up and I was like, Oh, it's World Cup final. I just felt it and then I was like, Okay, let's go to breakfast. And then I saw... What time did you get up? Nicely, I was like, I'm chill like that. 8, 9? 8, 39. Okay. 9, I woke up, 9, freshen up. I heard my music. Then I was like, World Cup final, and then I was like, okay, let's go. Breakfast, let's eat it. Spanish, I think I started breakfast. chilled with everyone 11, 11, 13 went back did my mobility routine half an hour which is what I live little bit of activation stuff took a shower ground it's a walking distance that we stayed at courtyard merit and it's like literally the D.Y.

27:58Partial is just walking distance which I don't I love the stadium but I like 10 minutes drive to the stadium why? for my music it gets you in a in a zone like you know you just feel like you should listen to two three songs so for dy part till matches i used to start listening to songs on airpods in room only so that i get depends tour to tour kabhi love love songs kabhi sad songs kabhi i'm more of that but like tufan and all of that like you know full so depends on what zone or mood i am in so before going to the world cup you're listening a sad song I don't I am pretty capable of doing that because I feel it calms me no like slow songs not like sad also I would say slow song your favorite slow song I am Arjid Bikarjid which one I think my all time favorite of him would be Channah Meriah

29:10I'm not listening to Channa Mereha Channa Mereha World Cup final I heard a lot of like this South Indian entry songs VGM songs like background music songs Tufan was my go-to song for a very long time I would feel like it doesn't suit my personality I think in my mind a certain way but in on like my personality is not such okay what do you think of yourself and i'm like a cholera up and that one dude not dude like i'm just like one i'll fight everyone okay and i'm like there i'll be playing a shot and smiling i'm like you're not this i don't know sometimes what it is like you're a south indian hero in your head yeah like you know i like full like an entry song with a goggle and all but somehow it doesn't happen like even I get a hundred and I'll be like okay I'm just like jump and have a like hand like moment and I will like show to all of those things and what I do is I just remove helmet and do this reality so yeah so that I think I heard two three songs before going to the final then got into the bus which was two minutes per drive.

30:32And then rain happened. We had a rain delay for an hour, which was stupid. I'm like, I say matches, this is how I just said, start is always very important. it's time to get two, three balls first. And then whatever happens, happens. three, four balls first. That's the toughest part of the match day. Any match day is the first approach towards the first three four balls. Because mentally, it's like a, like you're getting towards that. right and you're doing everything towards that as a batter and you have one ball out so you just have to make sure that you are really calm about it so rain really happened and I'm like then of course magically disappeared we had a toss we lost the toss we're batting first I was like okay batting first team meeting before the match the new thing I started a little soaking in the environment sometimes I go 5 minutes before and I soak in the environment like so that I'm used to it when I play I should not feel stressed okay so first I enter I like kind of see and like when it's loud and all I just try and soak it and and be comfortable around it because once you're comfortable you just feel like okay it's your space because once your heartbeat gets back to normal yeah then it just feels normal if I do batting then my 10 balls will play so I try and do it before so I was in my zone more has it happened with you before where you've not been able to soak in the environment and then yeah 2017 World Cup final I think I got out third ball zero I was 8-19 year old I never knew what to do what happened till the World Cup started I was already out on zero I'm coming back and I'm like oh kia hua I didn't know what happened like because you couldn't take in the environment yeah take in the environment did not do all of those things like you know i didn't make myself feel comfortable i just went to bat saw that was first time women's cricket had 20 or 1000 people in lords at lords and that's my first match at lords everything happening at once i went in the third ball is like zero out till i realized what's happening i was already out like you were not focused on the batting you were focused on like i wouldn't say i was focused that it's just that even if you're not focusing it I feel it's more than avoiding it you should just embrace it at that time I was avoiding it now I'm like wow you know like you know that's how it's changed now I'm like I embrace it I'm like it's fine you know all of those things so that happened I went to bat doing all of these things also first four five ball I don't know what happened ball came I don't know I didn't realize after fifth or sixth ball I was like and then yeah I mean it was pretty cool after that what happened after 7-8 hours we won the World Cup so what was going on in your head when you were going for the batting

33:36just I only tell myself watch the ball and play accordingly it's not too much I tell myself nothing how do you get back like how do you get your heartbeat normal just by soaking in the environment you get back I try and do like 3-4 deep breaths if at all I feel sometimes a lot but very rarely I am pretty like like a very chill person what do you do like deep breath as in like you count like just like 3 seconds in 3 seconds out sometimes when I feel it sometimes if it's a D20 match and I've played 2-3 dot balls and then you have that pressure of getting that scoreboard going so that time just to clear your mind at that time you want to play 5 shots sometimes I just and then I'm like okay watch the ball because still even that time the basics don't change no like the basics of batting don't change so I have to remind myself that Baba on the occasion you still like the basics of batting watching the ball sometimes it's like too much pressure too much pressure in the head not the match also but sometimes you feel like we played at Lords now we played the test match and we hadn't played Red Bull first time at Lords so and from T20 World Cup we just straight away went to so I had to keep telling myself Baba musti must you know you don't do must like you know after T20 you're playing test match and as an opener you're like there you have to hit you have to like play out sometimes I'm like I'm the best player according to so it's like some affirmation words you tell yourself you talk to yourself yeah if that's what I said if sometimes I feel like okay I have to get in a zone that is some days you are in that zone so you it again depends on what day you're in and when you're walking let's say you've changed put the kit you're walking on the ground walking on the pitch till that time do you tell yourself anything?

35:31do you talk to yourself? no okay I have that routine touch the ground go sideways twice sideways twice three backflips look at the sun just near the 23 yards like just do that and yeah they start and then first three balls in your head you are thinking that don't get out that you are thinking that God will play three balls no no first three balls first three balls you are like I'm going to throw it because it's my day like what is first three because you said first three four balls are the most problematic so I said like when it's a bigger match day for everyone yeah for me it's not actually I'm like not like a very first three four ball person I'm in the 70s 80s tension when I am out I don't know I have some random stats I have got out on 70s, 80s and 90s I don't know some number of times X number of times you've read I think I would have had like 20 odd extra centuries if I would have not really done all those things but first 2-3 balls just same thing, watch the ball play accordingly what happens at 80 I am also still wondering what happens there was a year where I was not getting out on 80s anymore and I had cracked it like let's go what is it different in that year?

36:56nothing I don't do I just feel it's cricket I mean you can't overthink from some things you said I'm nervous when I'm 70-80 I'm nervous I'm nervous I'm nervous same as it is at that time it is sometimes like you're batting extremely well on 80s and you must come it's not nervous it's not nervous it must be it must be It's a very fun thing. Then it's a problem of fun. So, it's a problem of fun. It's a problem of fun. Or even saying that, yes, fun, fun, do it. That time you go in like that 50-50%. Do it or not. Do it or not. No, no, no. Let's go. So, in that you get out. When you thought that you should do it, then you're not out to you.

37:34So, when you said that you don't do it, then you're out to you. When you're in the middle of it, thank you very much. But I have realized, I think, cricket has its own way to answer your questions like you can do a lot of things right you can do a lot of things here and there but sometimes when it has to come it will come when it doesn't have to come it wouldn't come and now i've accepted it that okay just put your head down do your work but how do you come in the zone then if let's say you are not in the zone zone form is a very overrated word okay it's not like you're not in form sometimes you're not batting the way you want to bat sometimes you're not you're batting well but some days your mind is running like a train it's just like so many thoughts are coming that is the day where maybe i feel i'm not in zone because at my best i don't think i just watch the ball and react that's the best i bat okay but there are days where you like this will kill this will do this you start thinking the shot beforehand that is when I feel I am not in zone and that's when I have to just remind myself what's the world like you know that's how I want to do that day nice interesting and do you have a superstition?

38:54I used to have many tell me generally I sit on the left side of the bus 4th seat but I don't know it's superstition it's just got used to as a kid you enter the seat is open and then it's just a thing then I used to always enter from the left side of the so I opened so the person is always on the right and I have to be on the left I broke that on WPL final actually wow what a day and yeah I'm like 200 left right

39:39200 is a huge score to chase like right to right it's just enter it and I was like anyways left and actually we chased it down so now it's nothing there like now I'll enter wherever it is left right like something superstition then then I still have a little bit but I have changed a lot I don't want the leg guard to be given at the first go I don't think anyone has ever had that so you go first thing and you ask for a leg guard your leg stomp so I don't like the umpire telling in the one go that's on your leg I like so that's why I cast the bat a little further away and then she will or he will tell me to get the bat in to mark the leg guard so I have to have it like twice, thrice like I can't have it on the one go

40:36very strange it is good and I don't know if it's superstition or a habit if I get out I tap the boundary rope three times yes completely I don't know how it started after getting out yeah no superstition is not good it's not good but I don't know three times I will come back next time next time I will come back I don't know that's a that's a thing I don't know why it has happened and I think it's a more your father and mother do they have a superstition? mommy used to not watch for the longest time she said I have a problem in my heart and then you know mommy said son you fell you know what's your fault so she used to she used to not watch she now tries to watch but bigger matches she can't watch she gets very nervous like World Cup final my mom she's like she told that firstly tickets were a lot of problems but she's like I want one ticket for myself I'm not coming to watch the match but I'll come to see you guys lift the trophy so I want the ticket to enter so she watched she didn't come for the match she was she was at our hotel room from up like you could see the ground she was up there 15 minutes 10 minutes I think when you were supposed to win she came down so that's like that's my mom my father my brother is very like serious he'll watch it very seriously papa is chill I don't think they have I'll ask them next time do they have any superstition or anything I'll have to ask them would you call them after every match before match I call them when I sit in the bus first thing I call is mom dad what do you say they have a particular way of saying all the best like with a tone my mom has a tone to say all the best and my father has a tone as well so they That's their superstition, I think.

42:28Like, when they wish me, they will say, nothing, it's just all the best. Everything is okay, right? Like, sometimes, like, in UK, you're playing and it's raining. It's not raining. Okay. Enjoy. Like, it's a two-minute call, but I don't remember a match I've played without calling them. Yeah. It's always, as a kid, I've always called them, even now. But it's just a ritual since the years you have made it. Yeah. I don't know when it started or what happened, but it's, for the longest, time for the last 15-20 years so i remember going for a mat and calling them nice that's a good thing yeah it's a nice thing i'm getting a blessing getting blessings from parents before mat is pretty cool hey good who between both of them who sacrificed most for you i think both in their own ways have sacrificed for me but mom in particular sacrifice me but she like because of those whole problems of family we kind of had to change our house and then our first father was part of the joint business we had so when we had nothing like he didn't know what to do a lot and then my mom used to start doing exhibitions she was very creative and that's how she actually raised us and maybe she used to always she used to work there and again cook as well take care of the house so yeah in that ways i think she's kind of like but never like never happened that they said I had to say that I had to do a lot of things but it wasn't that they tried their best to get whatever best we could and when did you realize that she is sacrificing or she is like working really hard to make sure that you always because I used to help her with all those things from day one you like from very early on you realized 9 10 only when you start realizing I understood that it's good I didn't know what the money was I didn't know the world but I knew that my mom was like really like working so much so I used to help her do table mats go for her exhibitions I used to stand in the exhibitions like it's like the exhibition halls or the like used to go to other cities used to take the stuff and I was I've done Abacus UCMAS that so I've done all the 8th level so my mats is pretty good nice so I so used to have like the clips as well hair clips so I was very good in the calculation so you would station me there.

44:53I used to tell auntie's auntie you're four-handed. So I've done all of those. I've seen her like work really hard. So it was like for me it was always like you know I want to give a very nice life to them. And they used to always encourage you to play cricket. Right? They were very supportive. But relatives were not in the beginning. Yes. I mean look at my brother also played. My relatives didn't have they didn't have they had an issue with cricket. But it was just Till that point anyone had not even heard women playing cricket. And start me it was like when I played school level and all we traveled from a general boogie and all of that.

45:34And for a Marwadi family it's a little like like a girl who left a general boogie in school. What's going on in school? All those like I would also I still feel it's like genuine concerns also. I don't know if it was a problem or what. But like genuine concerns also. How will she manage? She's just 9 or 11. Mom wanted me to play sports. But she was very keen on tennis. Because at that time against Ania Mizra was a huge impact. And single individual sports. She wanted me to do individual sports. Plus women's tennis was a lot famous than women's cricket at that time. Way bigger, yes. You knew Serena Williams.

46:16You knew Mariya Sharapova. They were like big names. She wanted me to do that because and I. There was someone to look up to. Yeah. Yeah. Because there was at that time I didn't know a lot of women cricketers. You don't know what's happening. So. So yeah. I think my mom wanted me to play sports but tennis more. But very early she understood that it was a lot of bad. So I used to be like I will play. I need tennis now. But after that I will play cricket. So that's how then they were like pretty cool with it. and then after 2-3 years it became like they are doing that what would they say like when I was reading again somewhere that relatives will say that this will be dark, it will not be married this is all every relative talks like mommy is also like me, we will see we will see we will see what we will see what we will do we will see you we will see they were very but the best thing is never came to us what happens problem how would he respond same I think he doesn't care I think my family in general they are not very like what will I say that's why they have let me like just be nice like I could take my own decisions at any point in my life and they they are all worried is my happiness and my well-being which is every parent yeah if that is happening they don't care if they're upsetting the world they're upsetting the relatives yeah they've never been a lot of parents that is so good yeah yeah it's a very rare thing that's luck that's absolute luck like their only care is about me and bhai i have to be happy yeah which is so rare because there are every parent want their kids well-being and happiness but there are some parents who care about what they will say way more than anything else and which is so sad very normal thing i feel it's very normal they would like again i don't know why it happens but they would do a certain way be a certain way because what people will think and all but i have never even been raised in that environment like i never knew that it would be like that we have to go with our people's guess.

48:42Like, you know, for me, it was always like, you know, you want to do what, you got to do what you got to do kind of a thing. And when did this happen to go with our people's guess? I don't even know. I don't care. I still don't. But you said like, I don't care still. No, but the kid version of you didn't care at all. But today, you care. I mean, in the jungle. I'm in the jungle, I'm in the jungle. I would not do a road fight at that time I couldn't do a road fight but yeah I don't think I still care about what will happen never no I think it's just a like with now social media it's just a 20 day thing 20?

49:26I said that 15 days the big thing if you win also you lose also it's just a 20 15-20 day thing right you have a 30 minute rule which is yeah it's a 30 minute rule I don't dwell on anything more than 30 minutes it's not a rule but but you can make it one yeah it's a good rule it's a good rule to give in a playbook of Switi Bandana mindset playbook I don't even know in mindset it can be a great rule let the world actually know this 30 minute rule it's a rule like I go back and it's like in my mind I didn't stop watch for 30 minutes but like I wouldn't dwell on anything in life not only cricket anything in life 30-40 minutes so far something happens something happens I think I've got up done yeah anything happens do you have emotions do you let yourself I think I don't have a lot of emotions I don't even have that I'm hiding do you allow yourself to feel yeah even when you're alone let's say not in front of public let's say this is a very public version of you no no of course I do feel and I have those emotions you're not numb or do you feel that you've gotten numb so I could go quiet but like crying sadness is something which I don't relate myself a lot to yeah I don't know why but it's very weird but there'll be eight people around me crying about something and I would just have extremely practical approach to that why are you laughing?

51:01no I didn't say that do you think inside it? because I feel I think it's a blessing some people who can cry because I don't cry as like quickly and I just feel like you should let the person be them I'm not a huge believer that I am like this you can also make this and there's no written success path or any path and what is success I mean people can make success but actually success is being happy like it's not about like what people have made success to be success. I feel success is actually just waking up, having a good 8 hour sleep and being happy within your own self. And I feel if someone wants to let out their emotions, do that.

51:47If I am what I am, I can be that. But I do feel on days where those self-doubts and all those things come. But again, like 30 minutes and I'll start doing something else. Do you cry? Maybe bathroom sometimes. bathrooms and shower and sometimes yeah maybe front of maybe one or two people of like I feel like when was the last time you cried good question I don't remember you know I cry for movies I don't cry for my real life okay if I watch a movie I cry so I think I was watching Musafir Cafe and it just got me emotional happy emotional and I cried why I also got very emotional at movie I don't know like the same Musafir cafe it's a very nice not even I got very happy emotional I was like yeah man I also want to do something like just leave everything just go at a open your own cafe I took right for Preeti oh no I was like like you know I mean the character Preeti I felt bad for her I was like just that emotions are less these emotions are less I was like happy emotions so cool like you know just away from the world away from everything just go on do your own bit like I think after cricket that's me like you know not seen not like just you want to be alone alone I mean it's just in your own yeah just be whatever wherever I would be just like because again I'm not a very social person so that's how but if you will see something in the movie you will cry about that in bathroom no no no I'll cry there only so I remember crying for Musafir cafe in UK when I was watching it yeah that's the last time I cried I would have cried myself you said like you would have cried in the bathroom she would have cried in the bathroom some matches hurt you some matches hurt you what was the last match that hurt you see Dubai really hurt me necessarily I did cry a little bit after that

54:06this world cup we could not make it to the semis that hurt me not necessarily I cried but I did it hurt me but there are a few matches where you feel like shit I should have like this was going to happen and what hurts you your own performance or team's performance who do you blame first you should always start with yourself like that's like that's how you have to be. First, you should start about your own self. What you could have done better. If you are the one who is like, you have to do this means you only don't have expectations of you that you could win that match. So, how will it be? Fair.

54:44So, I think I start with my own self first. I'll start with that short as I said. Whatever. Then maybe think a little bit about the team. This person would have played or this team. This person would have played all of them. Like, what we could have done better as a team. I don't get anything to add to anyone. Like, there's a lot in team sports, but I don't think, I'm not necessarily, like, I wouldn't go to a press conference and name anymore. Name dropping or whatever, I don't like it. Like, you're a team, you should back each other. You win as a team, you don't win as a team. Yeah, you can criticize the performance.

55:22You can criticize that, okay, this went wrong. This should have gotten better. We could not prepare. Whatever. whatever but name dropping is something which i'm not a big fan of fair which is the right approach you win as a team you lose as a team you lose as a team and then first introspect within yourself do you feel responsible yeah for a lot of things yeah of course because you you use certain vocabulary which is very interesting like almost every time you say like when when you were speaking about your mentor you said the first thought was i should not upset her right when you were talking about your mom and dad then you're with the team as well do you feel like do you have this constant feeling of this is my one big problem that you know i start i like blame myself first a lot about everything or i feel responsible for that person as well a lot which is a good thing also a bad thing also why is it a good thing and why is it a bad thing good thing that i'm not putting things on like anyone being a good person like technically bad things is sometimes like which now i have changed a lot that you don't let that person take decisions like because they have to also learn from their own like mistakes be it your parents your friends your teammates whoever so that's something which i think i have learned now with the leadership roles with wpl and everything that you know you you just let them be So guide them here and there.

56:52But what they do is not your responsibility. Like, I don't know how do I explain it. Because I am what I am because of my mistakes. And if I kind of protect them again and again about their mistakes, they're never going to grow. Then they start being dependent. And you need leaders in your team. You don't want someone who's following someone. You just want leaders because 15 leaders is great. leaders in a sense in their own life so yeah again I have changed that quite a lot now what's up how do you think about leadership see I I was always a captain as a kid I started leading Maharashtra team when I was 16 like the senior side I was leading when I was 16 and like Like I never knew, but I think I started enjoying it as well because like I feel, I feel, I think like that, that sometimes, you know, the preparation part in terms of leader, leadership, the preparation towards the game.