Jesse James: Why I chose to go to rehab | Forward Progress

0:00Hey, it's Thursday, which means we're coming at you with a short feel good story from a past guest. Hope you enjoyed the clip. This week, Jesse James.

0:14Why decided to go to rehab? I think like things like life and I think there was certain stuff that like, you know, I'd got myself in similar situations for years, not with adultery, but just with getting myself in trouble and drinking and like you know I think drinking for so many years was a giant band-aid for for stuff in my life and then once I once I quit drinking I filled it up with just like overworking myself and working myself till I was delirious and like you know and I think I've since working so much you know I felt a lot of resentment towards other people and it just like it was just a bad situation, you know?

0:58And I like, wasn't the best dad, you know? I, I just, my, just couldn't make it work, you know? And I think stress and everything else, like actually, uh, Dan talked me into it, you know, said, man, maybe you should go get some help. Did it? Yeah. You know? And it, and you know, I'll you, I don't need no help, you know? But then when you're all by yourself in my shop and there's a million paparazzi and I can't go anywhere and everybody hates me and I don't have any friends and you start feeling like the weight of the world you know it wasn't a nervous breakdown or anything it was like that it was just like man you know how is this happening why you know and it's if it was something that I didn't cause myself then I think it would be easier to digest you know why why me you know like but it wasn't why me it was like hey me me you know I did it you know I created this tornado of bull for myself like how do i fix this how do i be you know and like just got my car and drove there four in the morning told carla hey you got to watch the kids and split didn't tell anybody i was going didn't do anything and i went and like let me tell you man it's the best gift you could ever give to yourself if you've suffered any kind of like abuse as a kid or drug abuse or anything like that to go give yourself the i didn't even know what was wrong i sat there the first couple days like look at all these stupid you know depression and like i'm i'm not like that you know i'm fine you know but you know but i'm the guy that like just ruined my marriage because i banged some stripper so you know and ruined my life so there's got to be some kind of flaw in my personality that made me like think that was okay you know so so i went and it it's the best ever how did it make you feel the first time you opened up in a group setting oh it it was good you know that it was a it was kind of it all of a sudden once you put no one ever they don't go in there oh this is oh look at your up this is what's wrong with you this is what you did they don't do that you know they like make you have to realize it for yourself you know and for three quarters of the process, you're still like kind of, man, what, what, why did I do that?

3:26Why did I do that? And all of a sudden, man, it just clicks like, oh, this is what happens, you know? And it's, it's, you know, and like the kind of upbringing and the kind of stuff that I was around is like basically the same stuff that like, you know, can, you know, career felons and, and people on death row and stuff have, you know, they go through the same kind of like abuse and trauma and stuff like that that's what you create out of those kids you know and like for me to like kind of pull through it and like you know see it for what it really is and like i owed it to my kids that's i you know i did it for myself first and foremost but you know what i owed it to my kids to like be a hundred percent the best dad i could be you know and like do the put in the hard work you know three serp therapy sessions a day sometimes four wow you know to like you know you can't you can't pull the weed out unless you get the root you know you got to go in there and like figure out what the problem is and what what you need to do and rectify it and then basically and leave it all there describe the role-playing exercise you participated in um that was one that sucked because i like i had a girl you like each member in the group like becomes a member of your family or particular instance in your life and like a girl was me and like she was me at seven years old when my dad broke my arm and so like you know uh like to stand back and see her act me out man it was powerful it like really got me because I think you're you know you just when some stuff like that happens to kids you either like turn to like milk toast or you get tough and I got tough you know I was a tough mean kid like no one you know I didn't fear anything and I could fight my way out of anything and if I didn't have something I stole it so like that that's how it was and I think that stuff all that tough guy stuff was a big masquerade for like there's this kid that's like scared of his dad's gonna be out of him you know and like you don't really realizing it later and doing something about it you know that's what i did how much different is life today than it was then well i still have the same welder and it still works exactly the same so not much different in that respect um i i think i'm a better person i think I think I've embraced my craftsmanship and my life more and like, you know, five years after the fact, you know, it's like, I think I could have went one way or the other.

6:12And I think I've made the right decision. I mean, stepping out here and seeing where I work every day, it's like, why'd you move from California? It's like, duh, look how awesome it is here. That's it for now. But if you're hungry for more in-depth interviews, head over to youtube.com slash Graham Bensinger. You can dive into our deep library, which includes more than 2000 clips spanning 12 plus years. Thanks again for listening.

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