Nikki Glaser: I don’t think I’ll ever drink again | Trending Now

0:00This is your fix. I am your host, Stassi Schroeder. Welcome to Tell Me Lies, the official podcast. What's the most unhinged thing of season three? Steven, because he's so evil. I do think he is misunderstood. You see everyone face consequences. It's intoxicating. The writers just know how to trick you. There's always a twist in this show. Tell Me Lies, the official podcast, January 6th. And stream the new season of Tell Me Lies, January 13th, on Hulu and Hulu on Disney+. us. Hey guys, Graham here. It's Friday, which means we get to share with you another one of our most popular clips from a past interview.

0:39This trending clip comes from our TikTok. Hope you enjoy. This week, Nikki Glaser.

0:48Think you'll ever drink again? I don't think I'll ever drink again. I have no plan on it. You know, there are times where I go, I could probably have one, but I just don't want to risk it. I can dance now without it. I can have sex without like I used to drink because I was nervous to be around people. I don't need that anymore. I don't have social anxiety in that way. I used to facilitate things for me that I don't need it for anymore. But then there's things like pot that I'm like oh I give that up and then I go back to that because that facilitates things for me that I haven't found other ways to do it sometimes.

1:19How did your life change? I mean then I just then my eating disorders cranked up because it just like jumps to another thing but for me that was a better thing to be abusing at that time than alcohol alcohol was like I was going to get a DUI which was going to financially destroy me and potentially physically destroy me or others like it was just my relationships were based on drinking it was the only way I could have sex because I was scared of sex and so I would get blackout drunk I would hook up with people and then the second I would have to have sober sex because god forbid it was like the bars were closed or we couldn't get booze and then I'm like oh yeah let's do it and I'm like, having sex with someone, I'm like, I hate this, but I have to go through with it because if I don't, then I'm an alcoholic.

2:01It was leading me to be in all these situations, you know, waking up in the morning being like, who did I meet last night? What did I say? Making friendships with girls that I would see them the next day and they'd be like, thank you so much for talking me into getting that abortion. I'd be like, what? I don't even know who you are. I would have like, because I was such a lucid drunk, I would get blackout drunk and no one would know I was drunk, so I'd stop telling people stories because I just figured I'm probably gonna have told them when I'm drunk. Then when I quit drinking, people would be like, um, we've met before and I go, was it after 2011?

2:31And they're like, yeah, and I'm like, well, then that's your fault. Like, you're not memorable, so you should get like an eye patch or something, or like an accent, or just something, but you're forgettable, that's not on me. What role, if any, did JD's death play in it? My cousin died at the age of 30, and he was a couple years older than me, from alcohol consumption. He was so young and he was my best friend growing up. You guys were like as close as you can get. Like my brother. But then we had been many years of us not being close. And then I get word that he is like not doing well and he can't keep a job and he just stays inside all day and smoking and drinking.

3:10And like, you know, I wrote him a couple of emails being like, JD, like, come on, like snap out of this. Like, I think I had quit drinking at this point. And so I was like, here's a book. You can do this. and then he just died one day. And it's a progressive illness, alcoholism. And so I just knew that no one wants to start out being like a sloppy alcoholic that's in bed all day drinking or whatever. But like, it doesn't start out that way. It starts out like, fun, drinking, party. But it eventually gets there. And I just saw like, it will get there for me. And I just wanted to cut it off. But I hadn't talked to him in so many years.

3:44So I don't think I didn't let myself be sad about it because it was like, you weren't there for him. You could have like saved him. so you don't get to be sad now that he's dead because you didn't do anything. But it seems like it bothers you talking about him now. Yeah, it bothers me because I feel like I couldn't have saved him, but I feel like my family could have. I feel like my family could have adopted him when he was not doing well at a young age. He was already like my brother. We spent so much time with him. We'd sometimes talk about it. It just feels like we could have done something, and so I sometimes get into blaming.

4:16but now I look at it and I'm like that was always the way it was gonna go with him and there was nothing to do about it but it's just um what impact do you think your mom's drinking had I didn't like who she was when she drinks I love that she looks forward to it and feels herself and like can let go I get what it provides for her because I felt it too but I didn't like seeing this person that I knew and trusted like this is how they act act differently it used to I think as a little kid, like just, you know, you see your mom act different. Like your mom makes a weird voice and you're like, stop it, mom, you're being weird.

4:48Like it just made me embarrassed sometimes, you know, it just feels unsafe when your adult guardian gets intoxicated in a way that they start acting like a baby. I mean, that's essentially like drinking makes you stupid. And then you see your parents get kind of stupid and you go, no, you guys have to protect me. You're being stupid right now. But then when I got older and got into therapy, I was able to talk to her about it and be more open about it and now we have really really good boundaries around it and I have no problem with it anymore and it's it's we've come a long way I used to be very angry about it did you oh yeah really angry because what all the things that were wrong with me I needed a reason why they're bad oh my mom drank that's it mom you're the reason I don't have a boyfriend you're like it you're searching for something that doesn't mean it's your fault and so I think for a while I was really mad at my mom and like used to blame her and now I Don't have any anger about my mom's drinking.

5:42She's managed it amazingly. She's hilarious. She Was a great mom. She just gets a little too drunk too fast, which I do too What was the thing about her not loving you? I guess I had it in my head that my mom didn't love me. Maybe it was just something I said but like I She's gonna hate this.

6:03I I am so obsessed with my mom, I can't even stand it. But I think one of my earliest memories, I'm so sorry mom, and maybe I'm inventing it, but I was maybe four and I was screaming at my mom having a tantrum and I said, I hate you. You know, like in a four year old screaming. And my mom goes, you know what, Nick? I hate you too. I think that's when my brain was like, start making memories, this is profound. And so I remember my first thought was, wait, you can't say that. Like, I'm allowed to say it to you, but like, you just breached the parent-child relationship. I can say crazy shit all I want, but you can't give that back to me.

6:40I knew she didn't mean it, but I just, but it was still like, whoa, my mom just said she hated me. And then we didn't talk a lot. We didn't share our feelings. Wasn't really a touchy-feely family. So I think I just took all of that as like, she didn't love me because I'd see my friends, like their moms hold hands and stuff. And I'm like, oh, so my mom doesn't. But meanwhile, I had a dad who wanted to hold my hand. Like I, my dad gave me all of that affection that my mom maybe was a little bit more reluctant to, to do. But now she gives it to me all the time. Like I just have to ask. My mom goes, you know, I didn't hug you because you didn't like being hugged.

7:11Right. And I was like, I was a weird child. I really didn't like being touched. I didn't like certain sensory things. I've, you know, I speculate that I was a little bit on the spectrum and maybe still am. And at a young age, I like people touching me or getting too close or certain fabrics. I was like a weird kid. So I think my mom was probably just like, okay, don't touch her. You know, when really, she really was amazing and maybe had a couple moments where it like wasn't the greatest, but who doesn't? And also considering her childhood and what she came from and for her to only have that be her problem, triumph.

7:47Like she's amazing. I got the best mom possible out of the situation that she came out of. She's so strong. She's so smart. She's so funny. And I have so many addiction issues. Like now I look at her drinking and I'm like, oh, I so relate. And now I can like empathize and not be so mad. And that's this week's fan favorite. To see more popular videos, go to our YouTube channel at youtube.com slash Graham Bensinger.

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