More Rosebud - Gyles's Diaries episode 36

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1:52Gyles Brandreth: I'm Giles Brandreus and I'm so glad you're here because without you there wouldn't be rosebud and since this is tuesday there wouldn't be more rosebud uh if

2:02Michèle Brandreth: you're listening to this first time around this is coming to you on tuesday the 10th of march

2:06Gyles Brandreth: 2026 i'm giles and i'm sitting in our studio at the wonderful grovner house which is a hotel but also a way of life on park lane in london's mayfair it's where we have our studio and where the team here have been so lovely to me this week because I've been celebrating my birthday. More of that in a moment. I'm not alone here because on a Tuesday I'm never alone. I always have with me my friend, my producer. It's Harriet Jane.

2:37Harriet: Hello and happy birthday.

2:39Gyles Brandreth: We'll come to that in a moment, Harriet. Jane, or is it Wayne? We'll let people into a little secret. We had a meeting here a few days ago with a wonderful actor called Larry Lamb. And Larry Lamb is going to be appearing on a special, you'll know him, wonderful actor. People remember him particularly, I suppose, from Gavin and Stacey. And anyway, he's a delightful actor and I've known him off and on for a while. And we're doing a special Rosebud live from the Fleet Street Festival sometime this summer. We'll give you more details in case you want to come along. But he met Harriet for the first time.

3:15Gyles Brandreth: He came to really to audition for us because he wanted to do some poems as part of his rosebud. We thought poems, who wants poems? Who wants the truth? Who wants the story? His, you know, childhood. What's made him Larry Lamb? What's it like being called Larry Lamb? Anyway, he came with his poems and we were bowled over. But he was clearly bowled over by Harriet. And he called you today, Harriet. What did he say to you?

3:37Harriet: Well, he wasn't bowled over, my only child. He called me to say, can I have your email address because I need to send these poems to you. Yeah.

3:44Gyles Brandreth: He was bowled over. He'd already called me to say, can I have a mobile number?

3:47Harriet: No, no, no. Anyway, in the course of the conversation, he said to me, are you Spanish? And I said, no, I'm really English. I mean, I am. And he said, but your surname, Jane, J-A-I-N-E, is it Jaine? And I said, I don't think so. I think it's just a boring English name that's got garbled. And he said, but do you like olives? And I said, yeah. And he said, well, you're from this town in Andalusia called Jainé, apparently, which specialises in olives. No, so there's an actual place called Jainé.

4:24Michèle Brandreth: That's what he said.

4:26Harriet: And then, and he said, you know, maybe some olive trader or a conquistador, he said, came from that place to England and had fun with some English ladies and spawned, he thought, a whole.

4:43Gyles Brandreth: group of people with my surname and did he mention the red hair i said well i don't look very spanish

4:49Harriet: and he said well i said are there a lot of redheads in spain he said yeah they're all over

4:54Gyles Brandreth: the place there you are well i think larry lamb sees himself and this is just me observing the situation as a possible conquistador as far as you're concerned so watch out i'll be keeping

5:07Michèle Brandreth: he's not listening to this i hope he is no because he'll he'll be great it's not quite

5:11Harriet: embarrassing. Not embarrassing at all. Don't you're setting me up with future guests? Because I want to see Larry Lamb doing his poetry brilliantly. You will.

5:18Gyles Brandreth: You'll be producing that episode. You will be there.

5:20Harriet: It could be a bit awkward.

5:21Gyles Brandreth: It won't be awkward at all.

5:22Harriet: I told him I was going to prep a flamenco dance, so that will be a bit awkward.

5:27Gyles Brandreth: Listeners, you, I'm calling you listeners, I'm meaning you, you listening to this at this very moment. You can picture the scene, can't you? Larry Lamb calling Harriet, saying, I know the village you come from. Are you into olives? Moments later

5:39Harriet: she's saying i'll do a flamenco dance for you yeah you and i was going to learn the castanets i

5:44Gyles Brandreth: think exactly they're already it's already the castanets talk castanet talk i think that tells

5:50Michèle Brandreth: us all we need to know doesn't it yeah so we are here and it's not just harriet and me because it's a special treat today's one of the days when michelle has come along my wife of coming up Michelle for 54 years.

6:07Bob Monkhouse: I don't know you're the one that does the maths.

6:09Gyles Brandreth: Yeah but we've been together now and it doesn't seem a day too much.

6:13Bob Monkhouse: I'm not sure how it'll last. Let's have it last

6:17Gyles Brandreth: the week because we are mid-birthdays. The point of today is well not the point of today the point of today is we're going to do some diaries in a minute but the point of today is that it was my birthday on Sunday the 8th of March also International Women's Day and it's Michelle's

6:32Michèle Brandreth: birthday this coming Saturday the 14th of March the day before Mothering Sunday your birthday also

6:39Harriet: is the birthday of Albert Einstein yeah and Michael Caine gosh Michelle not a lot of people

6:48Gyles Brandreth: know that yeah exactly I think it may be Tessa Sanderson's birthday as well it's Pam Ayres birthday

6:54Harriet: I know that the poet Pam Ayres there's a lot of good people on this day a guest on Rosebud Pam

7:00Gyles Brandreth: heirs. So it's your birthday, darling, on Saturday. It's my birthday this Sunday. We celebrated, Michelle and I, on Saturday last. We're going to see the producers, wonderful stage version at the Gallic Theatre in the West End. I always like to be doing something on my birthday. I like to be doing something.

7:20Harriet: Yeah, keeping busy.

7:21Gyles Brandreth: At the Barnes Music Festival, we had the first revival, really in 100 years, of an opera by Edward German called Tom Jones. Henry Fielding, the great English novelist, one of the pioneers of novel writing in this country, lived not far from where we live in Barnes in southwest London. And I have this idea that there should be a statue to Henry Fielding in our part of the world. And I thought I'm a patron of the Barnes Music Festival. Let's see if we can revive this opera written by Edward German around 1903. very popular in its day but since fallen out of favour and so we did a concert version of the opera and i appeared as henry fielding in full 18th century costume we may put up some photographs

8:11Harriet: of this is that sort of britches and a britches i'm just relieved that you've got clothes on at all yeah i mean you don't often see jiles clothes do you michelle were you wearing tights i was

8:24Gyles Brandreth: stockings in fact stockings stockings so just describe the outfit because that is interesting stocking well buckle shoes yeah stockings which go up how far uh they go up above the knee and

8:36Harriet: they're held up by garters yes okay and then britches which go below the knee yep and then

8:41Gyles Brandreth: marvelous waistcoat marvelous i think it's called a jabot a kind of white yes yes yes a thing around your neck like a frilly necktie come a white shirt uh lovely waistcoat with lovely buttons and then a fantastic frock coat a gentleman's coat with i think it's called a frogging

9:01Bob Monkhouse: kind of gold brocade but it has a very good sort of swagger feel to it which it makes men feel very important i think we should remember that yes clothes really do serve a purpose don't they

9:13Harriet: They do. That's why the military, they put all those uniforms on. Yeah, exactly. It's absolutely true.

9:17Gyles Brandreth: And I was given a swagger stick to wear, a kind of cane that I could stride along with.

9:21Harriet: It's called a swagger stick.

9:23Gyles Brandreth: Well, in the army, it's called a swagger stick. I think you have to be a colonel or a buff to have a swagger stick.

9:27Harriet: And is it the time of wearing wigs?

9:30Gyles Brandreth: Yes. That was the challenging bit. Because the wig undressed, I looked like Farrah Fawcett Major. You'd be lucky. Or some star of the 1970s.

9:40Bob Monkhouse: You'd be lucky to look like her.

9:41Gyles Brandreth: I would be lucky to look like her.

9:42Bob Monkhouse: Yes.

9:42Gyles Brandreth: but when it was properly styled it looks like a long judge's wig yeah a gray judge's wig well long wig i want to see the photograph see what you think and a tricorn hat of course and interestingly putting on the costume gave me the role that's why costumes are so important and i was being henry fielding i was telling the story of henry fielding who died much younger than me He was only 46, I think, when he died. But he had gout. He'd lived a very full life. He'd had a, well, he had a happy marriage with lots of children. I think there may have been one or two children by the wayside as well. And then, scandalously, his wife died, which was a great sadness to him.

10:24He then married his wife's maid.

10:28Gyles Brandreth: Oh. Which caused a lot of brouhaha. I think he had five children by his wife.

10:32Harriet: Yeah.

10:32Gyles Brandreth: One of whom, I think, pre-deceased them. And then another five children by the maid. Golly. But he was happy with the maid.

10:38Harriet: He didn't have his britches on very often.

10:41Gyles Brandreth: they're very actually there's easy access oh good right these are britches you can drop yeah at the at the drop of a smock you can the raising of a smock you can drop your britches but i have to say

10:51Harriet: men do like i mean this is just from my observations widowed men do like to move on

11:00Gyles Brandreth: or they definitely did in the past have i told you this and then we must get on with the diaries

11:05Harriet: Well, we've got a few other things to do. I'm going to give you a present.

11:08Gyles Brandreth: Well, I'll just tell you this, if I haven't told you before. It's this, Harriet. Dr. Anthony Clare, who introduced me to all the research on happiness, said to me, there's lots of research that shows, we have discussed this, that married people are marginally happier than cohabiting people who aren't married, just marginally. But he said the real difference comes with a long marriage, like Michelle and I have had, when one of the parties dies. With a married couple, when one of the parties dies, when the wife dies, the man who remains, the widower, he within three years will either have remarried, found a new partner, or he will be dead himself.

11:45Harriet: Yeah.

11:45Gyles Brandreth: Within three years.

11:47Harriet: Because he didn't have anyone doing the cooking.

11:48Gyles Brandreth: He showed me the evidence of this. And he said the other way around, when there is a couple and the husband dies, for the wife who's left behind, it makes no... Nothing matters at all.

11:59Bob Monkhouse: Yes, it makes no difference whatsoever.

12:01Gyles Brandreth: Absolutely none. Isn't that extraordinary? I must do some homework on Larry Lamb's marital status before I let him come to do this recording. I don't think we need to do that. Well, I do, because we do homework. You must do homework as well.

12:12Harriet: Oh, I'll write the notes.

12:13Gyles Brandreth: Yeah, you write the notes and get them from me.

12:16Harriet: I'm going to make sure he's happily married.

12:18Gyles Brandreth: Well, if you aren't, Larry, don't worry. We'll sort it out.

12:20Harriet: A young Spanish woman.

12:22Gyles Brandreth: Yeah.

12:22Harriet: Right, Giles and Michelle.

12:24Gyles Brandreth: Who brings her own castanets. It is time for you to receive your birthday present

12:29Harriet: from Rosebud Podcast, i.e. me. Oh, Harry. Yes, and from the Rosebud family, because I'm sure everyone listening will also join me. Well, thank you, Harriet. Thank you for listening.

12:40Michèle Brandreth: That's totally kind. So is there a card for us both? There's a card for you both. Should Michelle open the card?

12:45Harriet: Michelle can open the card, yeah. How lovely.

12:47Bob Monkhouse: May I open it straight away?

12:49Gyles Brandreth: Please, on behalf of us both.

12:51Bob Monkhouse: Wow. It's a long time since anyone's given me this sort of a thing. I feel very excited. It is. It's lovely, isn't it? I wish I had these every day. Oh, look, it's got the owl and the pussycat.

13:02Gyles Brandreth: Oh, that's perfect.

13:04Bob Monkhouse: Isn't that perfect?

13:05Gyles Brandreth: And what's the message say? It says, Giles and Michelle, you're going to have to help me read this out.

13:10Harriet: It says, happy birthday to you with much love and gratitude and rosebuds from Harriet. Oh, that's clever. Thank you, rosebuds.

13:19Bob Monkhouse: Oh, can I see the guard? Yes, of course. There it is. No, no crying. No crying. No crying, Giles. It should be nice.

13:24Gyles Brandreth: I have to say, I love your handwriting. Good handwriting. Who taught you the handwriting?

13:30Harriet: I think I just developed it myself.

13:32Gyles Brandreth: It's lovely. You can tell. I could say you're a girl of a certain vintage. Yeah. You know, it's beautiful. Well, thank you, darling, Harriet, for that lovely card.

13:43Bob Monkhouse: It's lovely, isn't it?

13:44Gyles Brandreth: And there's a present as well? There's a present.

13:45Michèle Brandreth: So this is for you, Giles. Shall I open mine last?

13:48Bob Monkhouse: OK.

13:48Gyles Brandreth: Or do you think? Shall we open Michelle's first?

13:51Bob Monkhouse: Wow, there's lots of scrunching going on.

13:53Gyles Brandreth: Actually, can I say it's very sweet of you.

13:55Bob Monkhouse: Yes, it's very, very kind and totally unexpected. it. My golly, I'm not making...

14:00Gyles Brandreth: Oh, Michelle!

14:01Bob Monkhouse: It's gloves. It's lovely gloves. Is it mittens? Mittens is what it's got because the tops are still open. They're mittens. And it's a lovely, lovely sort of orangey colour.

14:11Gyles Brandreth: And can I say it's brilliant. Thank you so much. I didn't suggest this to you but you've no idea how, what a brilliant present this is.

14:17Bob Monkhouse: Oh, brilliant. It's lovely. This is really a lovely colour. Thank you. So thoughtful. Oh, I'm going to burst into a tears over for Michelle's present. No, I think Giles wants to put it on. Is it soft?

14:26Michèle Brandreth: Is it soft?

14:27Bob Monkhouse: It's very soft. You're really up to it for this because it really is very beautifully soft. It's lovely and so thoughtful. I'm very, very touched by it. It's really kind of you. I really like that.

14:40Gyles Brandreth: Now, everybody.

14:41Bob Monkhouse: Yes.

14:42Harriet: Okay.

14:43Gyles Brandreth: I've got a present too. Drum roll. Drum roll. What she doesn't know is the card and the label, et cetera, goes into the memoirs box.

14:50Harriet: Oh, really?

14:51Gyles Brandreth: So, you know, 100 years from now, some student I hope will be leafing through and saying, Who was this Harriet?

14:57Harriet: And they'll see the Paddington Bear wrapping paper.

15:00Gyles Brandreth: And in lovely Paddington Bear wrapping paper. I'm wearing my Woody and the Pooh sweater. Paddington Bear wrapping paper. Beautiful pink bow. I love it.

15:09Bob Monkhouse: That would really suit you, that pink bow.

15:11Gyles Brandreth: Thank you. We have always kept the bows, haven't we, Michelle? Yes, we have. We've got a drawer at home. We've rolled them round our fingers. We've got a drawer at home where this goes in, because I think we should recycle all this. Yes, I have.

15:24Harriet: I got that out of my drawer. Yes, yes. That's why it's a bit crumpled. No, but it's ideal.

15:29Gyles Brandreth: So if you keep that, Michelle, and don't lose the label, because that's got to go in the memoirs box. I won't.

15:33Bob Monkhouse: I'm very delighted to have it.

15:34Gyles Brandreth: Wrapping paper, though, we're a bit more violent with, you know?

15:38Bob Monkhouse: Well, it's very well wrapped. I'm sure I can guess who did it.

15:43Gyles Brandreth: It's like Joan Collins when she married a much younger man, and they said, you know, do you think the age difference would be difficult for your health? And she said, you know, if he dies, he dies.

15:54Bob Monkhouse: Did you? Yes. She did. She's famous for saying that. Be careful because it is fragile, Giles. Oh, it's fragile. Yeah.

16:02Gyles Brandreth: Is it your dreams?

16:05Bob Monkhouse: Bob or her?

16:07Gyles Brandreth: Oh, I'm going to cry.

16:08Bob Monkhouse: Oh, don't be silly. Please get a grip. He cries about everything. Please get a grip. That would be... I get emotionally engaged. No, you don't. You just start sobbing.

16:20Gyles Brandreth: Because I get emotionally engaged. Oh!

16:25Bob Monkhouse: Cry into the cup.

16:28Michèle Brandreth: This is very, very sweet.

16:30Bob Monkhouse: Isn't it nice?

16:31Michèle Brandreth: I'm very sensible. It's an antique, Charles. Oh, really? Yeah, you do. It's an old...

16:36Bob Monkhouse: It's a nice size, isn't it? It's a 19th century nursery mug. Yeah, so you can hold it.

16:42Michèle Brandreth: This is very special. Yes. This is a 19th century nursery mug.

16:48Bob Monkhouse: Can you read it off so that people can hear it?

16:50Gyles Brandreth: I can read it. It's very interesting. With a moral. Because it was given to a child. to remind them of the importance of gratitude. G is for Giles and for gratitude. And G is for gratitude, which we must all share.

17:10Michèle Brandreth: And this is Androcles and the Lion. And this is a Bible story, I think, possibly in the Apocrypha,

17:19Gyles Brandreth: where Androcles here, who is, I think, a Roman slave,

17:26Michèle Brandreth: manages to take a thorn from the lion's paw.

17:32Bob Monkhouse: From the paw of the lion.

17:33Michèle Brandreth: And the lion shows his gratitude by saving Androcles.

17:37Bob Monkhouse: There you go.

17:38Gyles Brandreth: And I know this because Bernard Shaw, the great Irish writer, who spent his life, as so many Irish writers did, in England, wrote a play called Androcles and the Lion, which is lovely. Well, that is a beautiful present, so thank you very, very much.

17:52Bob Monkhouse: And it's in beautiful condition. It's in wonderful condition. In well looked after.

17:56Michèle Brandreth: Well, I feel, as an antique, in beautiful condition, I think that's actually rather an appropriate present.

18:01Bob Monkhouse: Well, for both of us, actually. We're both fairly... Well, this is the week in our year, Michelle,

18:05Gyles Brandreth: when you and I are the same age.

18:06Bob Monkhouse: That is correct, yes.

18:08Gyles Brandreth: Tragically, we don't look it. You look younger than springtime. I don't think so. And I look like, as you often say, who do you often liken me to, old...

18:16Bob Monkhouse: Manoa.

18:17Gyles Brandreth: Old Manoa. That's who you liken me to, who I think was Samson's father.

18:23Bob Monkhouse: Oh, dear. or was he Delilah's father?

18:25Gyles Brandreth: He's an ancient, an ancient figure.

18:28Bob Monkhouse: Again, from the Bible. Old Manoa.

18:32Gyles Brandreth: You often say, you're old Manoa.

18:34Bob Monkhouse: Yeah, well, there you go.

18:35Gyles Brandreth: Sit up straight, old Manoa. Is that what you say?

18:37Bob Monkhouse: No, I don't say that. But I shall say,

18:39Gyles Brandreth: I'm nonetheless grateful for you being in my life. I'm grateful to have Harriet in my life. Most of all, thank you, listening person, for being there, because we're grateful to you. And we're now going to get on with this week's episode, which is my diaries. But happy birthday, Michelle. Happy birthday, Giles. And for June the 6th, happy birthday to Harriet. And if you're listening and you're a Piscean too and it's your birthday, happy birthday to you. Whenever your birthday is, have a good one.

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20:38Gyles Brandreth: On with my diaries now. We have reached October 1973, which means I'm 25 years of age. I'm living in London. Michelle and I are sharing a flat together in Muswell Hill. We've in fact got married earlier in the year, in the summer. We haven't yet told our parents that we are married, so very few people know. I am still trying to find my way in the world. I'm doing some broadcasting, some television, some radio. I'm doing some after-dinner speaking. I've got onto the speaking circuit. And I'm getting more involved in the theatre. I've been approached about organising a special gala event at the Oxford Playhouse, which is a repertory theatre in Oxford, and also about the possibility of putting on plays there, which is very exciting to me, but I'm young.

21:30Gyles Brandreth: Where am I going to get the money from to make this happen? How am I going to make any of this happen? And also, I'm travelling around the country, earning the bulk of my living, in a sense as I always have, by doing public speaking. Even when I was in my early 20s, I joined this agency, and I was sent to ladies' luncheon clubs and business events. And here I am, all these years later, more than 50 years later, I'm still doing it. This week I was doing, as you know, I did one the other day for Bankers Fidelity, which was an American insurance company. They were in London, they invited me to speak.

22:10Gyles Brandreth: So I'm still earning my living that way. It's quite curious. Anyway, let's see what's happening here. And if If Harriet, there's anybody whose name you don't recognise, like I'm coming up with two names that were once household names, Dame Flora Robson, does that mean anything to you? No. Great English actress, born 1903, died in 1984. She'd appeared in the original Oxford Blouse Company back in 1923, which is why I was getting in touch with her. But she was in a film, Catherine the Great, in 1934. Oh, yes. She was in many famous movies. Big star. Played Elizabeth I in a famous movie in the 1930s.

22:45Gyles Brandreth: Jane Asher, have you heard of her? Yes. She's still with us. Lovely actress. Beautiful.

22:50Michèle Brandreth: Still beautiful. Marius Goring, English actor. You probably haven't heard of him. No. Particularly associated with the film The Red Shoes in 1948. Oh, yes, yes. And the TV series The Expert that he starred in for many years.

23:04Gyles Brandreth: Oh, that sounds funny. Anyway, these were people I was getting in touch with. And somebody called Valentine Dial, known as the man in black. I think when I met him, he called himself the man in red because he got into terrible debt. Well, that's fun. Yeah.

23:18Michèle Brandreth: Wednesday, the 17th of October, 1973. Yesterday, Blackpool. Tomorrow, Oswestry.

23:24Gyles Brandreth: Today, in our living room, Dame Flora Robson, Jane Asher and Marius Goring rehearsed the scene we're going to be doing from The Importance of Being Earnest

23:35Michèle Brandreth: at the Oxford Playhouse Gala on Sunday. It was Dame Flora's idea and a wonderful one. she is so real as miss prism it's very poignant i cast jane and marius as cecily and dr chasuble they're perfect it's a perfect scene with some of my favorite lines the chapter on the fall of the rupee you may omit it is somewhat too sensational michelle did a salmon quiche and salad for lunch dame flora talked about her window boxes jane talked about her cookery marius talked about Marius.

24:11Gyles Brandreth: Michelle said, men, they're all the same. Monday the 22nd of October 1973. I'm on the train to Tadworth to address the South Headlands group of WIs. As I go, I can report on last night's golden gala. It was all I could have hoped for and more. Valentine Dial risked outstaying his

24:39Michèle Brandreth: welcome and was a touch too self-referential the man in black is now the man in the red etc but everyone else was spot on especially celia johnson the audience loved her and fenella fielding outrageous who ended act one by bursting through an eight foot high photograph of herself and

25:02Gyles Brandreth: singing a fabulous near the knuckle number with sapphic references to vita sackville west and Violet Trefuses that worked a treat. Wow.

25:13Michèle Brandreth: Michael McLearmore was completely extraordinary and unreal.

25:18Gyles Brandreth: This was an English-born Irish actor who founded the Gate Theatre in Dublin and did this extraordinary show. He did a show about Yates, a show about Oscar Wilde. Anyway, completely extraordinary and unreal. I went over to collect him from his room in the Randolph Hotel

25:34Michèle Brandreth: and he treated me as though I'd been working for him all my life.

25:38Gyles Brandreth: Ah, dear boy, there you are now.

25:41Michèle Brandreth: I helped him to tighten his truss.

25:43Harriet: Oh, gosh. He looked like an ageing Pierrot. Has given Michelle the giggles. Certainly has given me the giggles.

25:51Bob Monkhouse: Mentioned the word truss. Yes.

25:53Michèle Brandreth: He looked like an ageing Pierrot on steroids. In broad daylight, he wears full makeup, powdered face, mascara, lipstick and an improbable wig that is too small for his domed head. For his 15-minute scene, he had insisted on bringing his own carpet with him from Dublin. He needed it, he said, so that he could find his way around the stage. He did a sequence from The Importance of Being Oscar. His evocation of Oscar Wilde is a wonder to behold. Afterwards, in the wings, he was shaking with nervous energy, sweating profusely but so happy that it had gone so well act two opened with john gould at the piano nobody knew who he was but he threatened to steal the show and he might have done had it not been for sir john gilgood sir john had told me that he would do a bit from richard ii i told him he didn't need to come to the run-through, but he turned up at the beginning of the afternoon in a chamois leather jacket with a paisley handkerchief tied around his neck and sat in the third row of the stalls gazing up at the stage expectantly, apparently spellbound.

27:13Michèle Brandreth: I offered him tea. No, no, I want to see my colleagues. That's why I've come. They're all so good. Even Marius is doing well. he closed the show with rich the second i watched him do it twice once in the run-through and then in the evening each time it was precisely the same every inflection and each time at exactly the same moment tears began to trickle down his cheeks so wait giles is this you've put on this

27:46Gyles Brandreth: gala at the oxford playhouse this is extraordinary to mark the 50th anniversary of the oxford playhouse which had been founded in 1923. In 1973, I, age 25, was invited by the woman who was the administrator of the theatre to organise this event, this Golden Gala. So I found a list of all the people who'd appeared there, particularly the people who were there in 1923, who included John Gielgud and Flora Robson. So I wrote to all these distinguished people. I wanted younger people as well. that's why I got John Gould in, because he was a sort of young person and current, and was hilarious. But we had all these distinguished actors coming along.

28:29Michèle Brandreth: And for me, age 25, to meet somebody like Dame Flora Robson, who was a complete delight, and then befriended us, came to our flat, and we kept in touch with her. Yes, it was lovely. And this was somebody, you know, who'd been born with people like Ellen Terry were around.

28:44Gyles Brandreth: So if, like me, you're interested in the history of theatre, this was living theatre. And then Sir Jean Gielgud, regarded by everybody as the great classical actor of the 20th century, is Richard II, which he first did in the 1930s, world famous, came and there he is sitting there doing it for us.

29:05Harriet: It's amazing they agreed. It's brilliant. And what I now realise is they paid their own fares.

29:12Michèle Brandreth: Yes, I know. I don't think we even picked up the bill at the hotel. Gosh. I mean and Michael McLiamore this eccentric Irishman I was quite shocked when he said

29:20Gyles Brandreth: I mean I communicated with him he had to bring

29:22Michèle Brandreth: this carpet and I think he had to bring it as hand luggage because I didn't know how to get a carpet

29:27Gyles Brandreth: from Dublin to London

29:28Harriet: was that because he had to have it in his dressing room

29:30Gyles Brandreth: no he had to have it on stage and I'm familiar with this because as you know I do a show now with Dame Judi Dench and Dame Judi has to have a carpet on the edge on the stage so that they can see even if the eyeset is going where the colour the edge of the carpet goes they have a light coloured carpet so they can see the difference in the edge of the carpet so they don't fall over. So he had to have this.

29:50Harriet: And did they suggest what they wanted to do? Did he say, I'll do Richard II?

29:54Gyles Brandreth: I probably asked him to do that because I wanted something from this earlier era. So with some of the turns, I suggested what they do. With Fenella Fielding, I had huge photographs, I remember this now, of all these stars. The set was all these stars in eight-foot-tall photographs, which cost a fortune.

30:16Harriet: Yeah, I bet.

30:17Gyles Brandreth: The printing. About£50 a photograph. That would now be£500 a photograph.

30:22Harriet: You spent all their train fares on the photos. Yeah. It was good. You put the money on stage. And I did. Yeah. And then Fenella Fielding came up

30:32Gyles Brandreth: and whispered something to me in the wings. And I said, okay, go for it. She was the first half closer. We did all these wonderful pictures. of these great people, like Sir John Gielgud, Dame Flora Robson, you know, and Fenella Fielding and others, who was then, at the height of her fame, she'd been in Calley Hall, screaming, she was a great cabaret star, wonderful, eccentric lady, and her moment, we say, Miss Fenella Fielding! And there's a spotlight on your photograph, and then the person would come round the side of the photograph and do their piece of wild applause. Miss Fenella Fielding! Nothing happens.

31:12Gyles Brandreth: Then you see a hand scratching at the photograph from behind. Then two hands burst through the photograph.

31:20Michèle Brandreth: The photograph is torn in two and the real Fenella Fielding steps through the£500 photograph.

31:27Gyles Brandreth: Gone forever. Camp. How camp is that? It brought the house down. Nobody knew she was going to do it. Gosh, she was a star. Fantastic.

31:35Harriet: So it was for one night only.

31:38Gyles Brandreth: It was for one night. So it didn't matter that she'd ripped the£50 picture. It did ruin the set for Act Two. I had to remove it.

31:45Harriet: Oh, yeah.

31:46Gyles Brandreth: But it all was well. We rearranged the set during the interval. But it was a fabulous night, a night to remember, you know. Extraordinary. Anyway, on we go. Wednesday the 14th of November, 1973. A dilemma for the newspapers today.

32:01Michèle Brandreth: Do we go for drama or romance? The Daily Mail offers a compromise. On the left-hand side of the front page, the headline, Heath's Moment of Truth. Edward Heath was the Prime Minister. Faced with the blackest situation since he took office, the Prime Minister yesterday dug in for a bitter economic and industrial siege. It was a day of drama and shocks. On top of the fuel crisis and the miners' and power engineers' threat to the whole anti-inflationary policy came the news of the most disastrous trade figures in our country's history. Ministers were left in a mood for belligerent defensive action.

32:39Michèle Brandreth: even a winter general election on the issue who rules the country, the unions or the government is being discussed. While on the right-hand side we have a fabulous photograph by Norman Parkinson of Princess Anne and Captain Mark Phillips on the morning of their wedding the souvenir picture that spells out the happy days ahead. And inside the paper details of the minute-by-minute TV coverage On BBC, 7.30am, Fyfe Robertson with news, views and horoscopes. 8am, Alistair Burnett and Valerie Singleton discuss the day. 9am, Pete Murray on the Royal Route. Cliff Mitchell-Moore in Great Somerford plus Bob Weddings.

33:27Michèle Brandreth: 11am, the Queen and Royal Family leave the palace. Reporter, Michelle Brown. Whoa.

33:37Harriet: Yep.

33:37Michèle Brandreth: There you are. Michelle was there.

33:41Gyles Brandreth: She was, you know, she was hosting her own show on television.

33:45Bob Monkhouse: Amazing.

33:45Gyles Brandreth: And there she is, reporter Michelle Brown. The Queen and Royal Family leave the palace, and who's telling you that? Standing in the mile, it's Michelle.

33:53Harriet: That's very impressive, Michelle. C 'est la vie. C 'est la vie.

33:57Michèle Brandreth: But you actually, the truth is, Michelle gave it up because she didn't much like it. But for several years...

34:02Bob Monkhouse: Well, also because we had the children to look after. That was the real reason. Yeah.

34:06Harriet: And was this live, Michelle? So you'd have been doing it, thinking on your feet? Yes. She was live.

34:12Gyles Brandreth: She was standing in the mall with a microphone, saying, here comes the Queen, here comes Ruzan.

34:15Bob Monkhouse: I didn't do sort of reset ones. The diary goes on.

34:18Michèle Brandreth: Listen to this.

34:19Gyles Brandreth: And I've just been watching my girl outside Buckingham Palace. This is the royal event of the year, and my wife is the reporter of the day. Younger, more professional.

34:28Bob Monkhouse: More. More. Don't get a grip, man.

34:33Michèle Brandreth: I will get a grip. Younger, more professional than all the rest. And I'm not just saying that in case you try to take a sneak peek in here. I mean it. Because, of course, I was writing this in my diary. Michelle might have access to my diary. Anyway, on we go. I've also now seen Princess Anne. She doesn't look quite as lovely as Norman Parkinson's pictures that make her out to be. But I have to say, the dress is simple and striking, and she does look good.

34:58Harriet: Yeah, I remember that dress.

34:59Bob Monkhouse: I remember it as well. She did look good. Yes, she did. and she looked not overdoing it.

35:04Michèle Brandreth: Friday, 30th November, 1973. The country is stumbling into darkness. No coal, no oil, no sign of when or how it's going to end. And yours truly is shambling back to London after 36 hours on the road touting my wares. Today it was Birmingham. I've been a guest on Pebble Mill at One, talking with Arthur Negus, professional old darling, about my discovering pantomime book. Afterwards, in the green room, I had a jolly sandwich lunch with Mr and Mrs Charlie Williams. Charlie, the star guest on the show, must be Britain's first, first division black comedian. He's huge, making a fortune. Millions, I imagine.

35:48Michèle Brandreth: He's very charming, very Yorkshire, everyone's me old flower, very self-deprecating, apparently amazed by his own good fortune. I'm just a poor booger from Barnsley. and he plays on his colour with almost every gag. He, if you don't shut up, I'll move in next door. He said that three times to various people this morning. He does all the racist jokes you get from Bernard Manning and co, but because of his colour, they're somehow acceptable. Also, he's likeable. You can't not want him. Yesterday, I was not far from Williams country, in Bradford, for the Yorkshire Post Literary Luncheon. Me, Dennis Norton, Leslie Thomas, Jimmy Cooper and the entire Monty Python team.

36:33Michèle Brandreth: Too many, too much. We were still at it at 5pm. The Pythons were the stars. But where Charlie Williams would have given the crowd an old-fashioned turn, their contribution was a bit rambling and ramshackle. They're friendly, except for Graham Chapman, oddity, and Terry Gilliam, loner. Michael Palin, Terry Jones, Eric Idle, normal and straightforward. I like John Cleese. He passed a note along the table to me when I sat down. It said simply, nice speech.

37:06Harriet: Well, that's very classy of him, Giles.

37:08Michèle Brandreth: Nice thing to do, because they were the biggest stars in the country at the time. And he's always been nice. Well, he came to be on Rosebud, didn't he?

37:15Harriet: Yeah, yeah.

37:16Michèle Brandreth: Fifty years later. Yeah. Jilly Cooper. Jilly Cooper, we've had her on Rosebud. This is 50 years ago. Jilly Cooper didn't speak, but crinkled up her nose when she was introduced and shook her head like a Labrador puppy. Everybody loved her. Dennis Norton was impeccable. Laconic delivery, arched eyebrow, and a very nice man. I spent a lot of time talking to Leslie Thomas. He has sold a million copies of The Virgin Soldiers in Britain alone. He talked much about himself and his achievements, but the audience was happy. They knew where they were with him. With the Pythons, they weren't entirely sure.

37:57Michèle Brandreth: Eric Idle said, John Cleese is normally very dull, but can be interesting on Mondays between 5.30 and 6pm, and on the first Thursday of every month. The ladies of Bradford in their petaled cloche hats were not sure whether this was a joke or not. Oh gosh, that's funny. I'm interested, actually, by, in a way, the quality of my observation of these people at the time.

38:20Harriet: It's excellent, John.

38:21Michèle Brandreth: And also how many of these people have stood the test of time.

38:24Harriet: Absolutely. And are still with us.

38:26Michèle Brandreth: With Michael Perrin on Rosebud as well.

38:28Harriet: I know, I know.

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39:09Gyles Brandreth: Monday, 17th December, 1973. News from the world

39:14Michèle Brandreth: According to our beleaguered Chancellor of the Exchequer, Anthony Barber The nation is facing the gravest situation by far Since the end of the Second World War In an emergency budget He is cutting public expenditure by hundreds of millions And because of the shortage of coal Thank you miners And the price of oil Thank you Sheikyamani Electricity consumption for business is being reduced to three days a week. Wow. After Christmas, television is going to be obliged to shut down at 10.30pm. The lights are going out all over the land.

39:54Bob Monkhouse: I didn't remember. Do you remember this vaguely? Well, I remember it vaguely, but I wasn't aware that it was as bad as it was. I'm really surprised, not able to get any sort of...

40:05Harriet: Was it scary?

40:06Gyles Brandreth: Well, I think we just carried on regardless. I think we did. Eventually, we're forced... offices started closing, I think it was a three-day week. You wouldn't have lights on on certain days.

40:14Harriet: It was quite fun. You just have a day off.

40:16Bob Monkhouse: Yes, but you don't get paid if you don't get to. That's true.

40:19Gyles Brandreth: But we were already freelancers.

40:21Bob Monkhouse: Yeah. It's quite scary. That was scary.

40:23Gyles Brandreth: I think we're getting to the bit where the interest rates begin going up and up and up.

40:26Bob Monkhouse: And it became really frightening. And we really were strapped for cash. It would be more than that. But anyway, I'm reporting it.

40:32Gyles Brandreth: Clearly there's high drama in the world.

40:33Bob Monkhouse: Yeah.

40:34Michèle Brandreth: Yeah. News from the home front. We are buying in candles. Listen. We are buying in candles and taking refuge with an assortment of mad ladies, e.g. Sunday night supper with our new friend, the solo aviatrix, Sheila Scott. Wow. Oh, do you remember Sheila Scott? You met her. You interviewed her on a TV show. I did.

40:55Bob Monkhouse: I did lots of things like that with different people, and she was very good to talk to.

40:59Michèle Brandreth: What's interesting to remember about this period is that Michelle was the star. She was on television. She was meeting these famous people and interviewing them. And Sheila Scott had gone in 1971, not long before, as part of a 34 ,000-mile flight going around the world and a half. She became the first person to fly solo over the North Pole in a light aircraft, male or female. She was truly intrepid.

41:25Bob Monkhouse: She was.

41:26Michèle Brandreth: Anyway, Sheila Scott, she flies around the world in her tiny aeroplane, breaks another amazing record. she has more than a hundred to her credit and then sits alone in her flat in Marble Arch. Her best friend is her mascot, Bucktooth. And now us. Her achievement is colossal and her stories of flying over the pole without sleep simply amazing. She does sleep, she catnaps alone at the controls mid-air. But essentially, she is barking mad. Her company is interesting, but exhausting. ditto vanilla fielding just in from drinks with her in connell place michelle i don't remember this at all just in from drinks with her but i don't remember the details i don't remember this at all just in from drinks with her in connell place she's lovely that husky purring voice is for real, but she is unreal.

42:25Michèle Brandreth: Fun, clever, funny. It's carry-on screaming, sprung to life, but ultimately wearing. Friday the 21st December 1973. I envy people who don't feel the need to hide their vices. At ten in the morning, Jack D 'Emanio takes me to a pub by a broadcasting house. It is closed, except to him. He knocks on the door and is admitted.

42:56Gyles Brandreth: Do you even know who this man is, Harriet?

42:58Harriet: Yes, you've mentioned him before. He was the presenter of the Today programme.

43:02Gyles Brandreth: He was a radio presenter.

43:03Harriet: Oh, radio, yeah.

43:04Gyles Brandreth: He'd been big in the wartime as a war correspondent. He was a radio presenter of the Today programme. So famous, always getting the time wrong. He was drunk.

43:14Bob Monkhouse: It was part of the fun, I think.

43:15Michèle Brandreth: Well, wait for it. The landlord serves us whatever we want. There is no charge. We are the landlord's guests, so it's quite within the law. Jack drinks shamelessly all day long. It will kill him, of course, but he seems reconciled to that. Paddy Campbell is completely unselfconscious about his drinking too. Do you know what I mean by Paddy Campbell? Patrick Campbell, he had a stutter.

43:44Harriet: Oh, yes, I think you've talked about that. Call my bluff, he appeared on and was very famous.

43:48Michèle Brandreth: Yes, yes. Paddy Campbell is completely unselfconscious about his drinking too. And at 12 noon today, I had coffee with Bob Monkhouse at his house in Loudoun Road, St. John's Wood. Before I left, I asked to go to the bathroom. He said, go downstairs, it's more fun. And it was. The bathroom walls are covered with huge, amazing, larger-than-life, full-colour photographs of naked girls. With huge, amazing... Well, we'll get the drift. But what impressed me is the fact that Bob, at home, with his wife and family, should be so at ease with himself and the world that he can have these incredibly sexy pictures on open display.

44:29Michèle Brandreth: Today's been a long day, but a good one. 8.30am with David Jessel at LBC, previewing the station's festive fair. Michelle and I are hosting and making the Christmas Day programme for LBC. Three hours of it. I like the idea of working on Christmas Day. I like the idea of working when others are not, getting ahead of the game. 11am went on to record Paddy Campbell stuttering charmingly in Eaton Square. 12 noon, record Bob Monkhouse talking about Christmas cracker gags in St John's Wood. 3pm on to Barnet to be met at the station by Barbara Cartland's White Rose Royce.

45:10Gyles Brandreth: Miss Cartland is a joy Pale gold hair like spun candy floss

45:15Michèle Brandreth: White powdered face Jet black eyelashes The size of tarantulas And a dress of flowing pink tulle She did look like a very old version Of the Sugar Plum Fairy But what a pro

45:29Harriet: I can totally imagine her

45:30Michèle Brandreth: She was fantastic As you know, great romantic novelist She greeted me at the front door And led me straight through to her drawing room asking me at once about William, that was William Lewisham, her grandson who'd been at Oxford with me, and whether I'm taking the right vitamin pills. Have you tried my brain pills? And the right honey. The right honey is so important. She sat herself down in what she called her interview chair, and I perched on a stool at her feet. As I pushed the microphone towards her, she leant over the arm of the chair and flicked a switch. Suddenly, she was suffused in a warm glow of pink light.

46:10Michèle Brandreth: On the floor, around her chair, were a series of theatrical lamps tilted towards her. It's only radio, I'm afraid, Miss Garland, I said, awed. I know, my dear, but it's a performance nonetheless, and I owe it to my public to always look my best. She talked a lot of twaddle, at great speed, all about the joys of virginity and the number of proposals she had had before she was 21 and the ten novels she has written this year. Or was it since breakfast? But it flowed effortlessly. It'll barely need editing. And I'm very grateful. I'm grateful too for the pot of honey, the tubs of vitamins and the autographed first edition of Men Are Wonderful wrapped in pink wrapping paper, signed in pink ink.

46:58Michèle Brandreth: she promised to name one of her heroes after me. Sir Giles has a ring to it and told me I would go far. You have good manners. Good manners are absolutely essential to success. All the great men of history have had perfect manners. And I can tell you something else, young man. Good manners are a sure way to a gal's heart. mark my words courtesy conquers everything

47:30Harriet: oh you've really taken that to heart Giles haven't you well

47:35Michèle Brandreth: she was clearly in her own strange way rather a remarkable woman wasn't she we have kept that present she gave us unopened

47:44Bob Monkhouse: yes we never opened it

47:45Harriet: wow

47:46Michèle Brandreth: because it was so special

47:47Harriet: yeah

47:48Michèle Brandreth: and she did name there's a Barbara Cartland novel with Sir Giles with a Y as the hero but what's funny to me Woo-hoo, Giles. Michelle.

47:56Harriet: Sir Giles.

47:56Gyles Brandreth: Thank you. Michelle has often said, and I've told you this before, that I've never grown up, that I'm doing now. And I often say to you, I feel we're editing the school magazine, you and I, Ariad. But here we are 53 years ago. I'm pressing the recording button. I'm saying she's so fluent, flowed so effortlessly, it'll barely need editing. And at the end of many a recording, you say, God, they were so fluent, it'll barely need editing. Yeah. Nothing has changed. Nothing's changed.

48:25Michèle Brandreth: it's so strange you weren't even born at this time i know it'd be great to have barbara cartland

48:30Harriet: as a guest it is when you read these diaries you think oh it's a shame we missed quite a few well

48:35Gyles Brandreth: obviously hundreds and hundreds of brilliant people we may be able in the basement room will be the tapes of me talking to paddy campbell to bob munkers to barbara garden all that is there

48:48Harriet: somewhere i mean barbara cartland would be fascinating and we've talked haven't we It'll be in the basement.

48:54Gyles Brandreth: Yeah, in that room with all the archives. If we can find a way of getting them, we might do some special episodes for Rosebud of me talking to the late Lamented.

49:04Harriet: Yeah.

49:05Gyles Brandreth: You know, I've got.

49:05Harriet: Yeah, absolutely.

49:06Gyles Brandreth: Ronnie Corbett, some of our favourites.

49:08Harriet: Yeah.

49:08Gyles Brandreth: And I think you know, I've got the last ever interview with Quentin Crisp. Yes.

49:13Harriet: Yeah, well, I think we're going to put these out at some point, aren't we? Yeah, we are.

49:16Gyles Brandreth: Maybe we can find Barbara Carton, bring her back from the dead.

49:19Harriet: So get ready, listeners. Okay.

49:20Gyles Brandreth: We've almost reached the end of the year. So, that was my encounter with Barbara Cartland.

49:26Michèle Brandreth: Saturday the 29th... Oh, this is the end of the year.

49:29Gyles Brandreth: Yeah.

49:29Michèle Brandreth: Saturday the 29th of December, 1973. Yesterday, we went to the matinee of Peter Pan at the London Coliseum. Outside of Shakespeare and Uncle Vanya and the importance of being earnest, it's probably my favourite play.

49:47Gyles Brandreth: Maggie Smith as Peter was good Dave Allen as Mr Darling and Captain Hook was not

49:57Michèle Brandreth: we couldn't hear him the Coliseum is a vast space he was lost in it and he is an outstanding Irish raconteur and this is a piece that requires an outstanding English actor I loved it all the same When I was a child and used to see it every year at the Scarlet Theatre, when we got to the bit where Peter asked us to help save Tinkerbell, instead of clapping our hands, we lit matches and cigarette lighters. It was magical. All over the theatre, tiny flickers of firelight. My favourite Peter Pan story is the Hermione Gingold one. She's seated in the fourth row of the stalls. Peter Pan calls out from the stage, Do you believe in fairies?

50:45Gyles Brandreth: Gingold in a stage whisper, Believe in them, darling. I know most of them.

50:53Michèle Brandreth: Supper at home last night for Michelle's parents and her brother Simon. Plus ma and pa, Polly, Jen, Peter, Sarah and Lizzie. All quite jolly. It's all the family. At 11.15pm, the last of my panto talks on Radio 4. The truth about Robinson Crusoe. Today, at 5pm, we're going to see Toad of Toad Hall, with Richard Goulden giving us his mole. And next year, asks Michelle, are there plans for us to move beyond your childhood? Michelle. Isn't that interesting, though?

51:30Harriet: Michelle does a really good line in one-liners, don't you think?

51:35Gyles Brandreth: I do think, but what I think is intriguing is how consistent she has been.

51:40Harriet: Yeah?

51:41Michèle Brandreth: she's coming up with the same quips 54 years later well she's still trying to get you to listen to them giles to grow up to move on yeah and it's clear harriet that we haven't no have

51:54Harriet: you left your childhood behind harriet uh no not really i don't think i've still got a lot of um things that i keep from my childhood and i have them arranged in my office and things and And I think, you know, people ask you what age you think you are. And I think I'm quite young. I think I might even be 14 or 15 or something. I mean, not 100 % because that would be a bit strange. But I think that's where I am. I'm not 30 or something like that. I'm young, yeah. But someone did say to me, I spoke to someone who'd lost their father young. And he said he felt he was stuck at that time. whenever his father had died, let's say it was 1973 or something, he said that all the music he loved was from 1973.

52:44Harriet: All the programmes he was interested in were from 1973. And I think to some extent I sort of slightly got stuck in...

52:51Gyles Brandreth: Because your mother died when you were 13, 14 years old.

52:54Harriet: So something sort of, yeah, that maybe does happen. So what about you? How old are you?

53:00Gyles Brandreth: Well, I'm in my teens or early 20s. I'm in this period. The heyday. All the things that, well, was it they? I don't know. I suppose I'm repeating all these things and all these people. What is interesting, all these names from the first 25 years of my life, if I didn't know them then, I made sure I knew them. If you're interested in Maggie Smith, one of the thrills of Michelle's in my life is that Maggie Smith became a friend of ours, a proper friend, you know, come round for supper in the kitchen and really liked Michelle. When Michelle had a special birthday a few years ago, Maggie Smith came and wanted to sit next to you.

53:35Gyles Brandreth: And she was lovely with us. And people who follow Rosebud, we've got a wonderful conversation with Maggie Smith and the American actress Kathleen Turner here. And so many of these characters that I first met then, we're having them on Rosebud now.

53:49Harriet: But I think you keep up with the times as well. Yes. I don't feel you're someone who's stuck in the past. No, I'm not stuck in the past.

53:56Gyles Brandreth: I'm still enjoying the things I enjoyed then.

53:58Harriet: And you still know who the TV stars are of today. Indeed. And you're thrilled to meet them on This Morning. Absolutely.

54:04Gyles Brandreth: And that's funny enough. why I do these things, why I go out and do this morning, in order to meet the now people.

54:09Harriet: Yeah, so you're not just somebody that only knows about people of 1950.

54:13Gyles Brandreth: And we like going to new plays and seeing new things. We like knowing the new equivalents of John Gielgud and Flora Robson are. That's exciting to us. I should say to you, if you're listening, you're not a member of the Rosebud family. We do do extra episodes every Sunday for Rosebud family members. and two of them are of particular interest. Every other Sunday I read from one of my murder mysteries, but every other Sunday it's me and Harriet chatting. And we do a sort of down memory lane where we take each other on journeys into our past. We've got nostalgic. And then we do sort of funny, ridiculous episodes, really, which are our current diaries, what's happening to us right now.

54:54Gyles Brandreth: Family secrets, that's called. Family secrets, we're now calling it. And some of the secrets are true family secrets. And if we do a stage show and there's talk of that, so watch this space if we do a stage show um i think family secrets may be part of it and there may even be an opportunity for you if you come along well to share a family secret of yours with us so if you want to join the rosebud family simply go to a website that is called www.patreon.com forward slash rosebud that's p-a-t-r-e-o-n dot com forward slash rosebud

55:31Harriet: and all the details are there but jiles jiles i think we should play a clip a bit of the one we did recently about lemon meringue pie about food because it was a really fun and i think everyone

55:43Gyles Brandreth: would love to hear a bit of it you would love to hear this it's it's somewhat ridiculous this has been a very lovely day for Michelle and me coming to the lovely Grovener House and being given them beautiful presents. I know. So before we leave you with this amusing extract can we say thank you to you Harriet for you know having a couple of old crocs like us in your life and for bringing us some old croc in the sense of the crockery you gave me the lovely mug.

56:10Bob Monkhouse: I wish to say I do not feel like an old croc.

56:12Michèle Brandreth: You're not an old croc.

56:13Bob Monkhouse: Old I am but I'm not an old croc. You'll never be an old croc.

56:16Michèle Brandreth: I accept old. I withdraw the old croc. Yes. You are younger than Springtown.

56:22Harriet: Don't worry, I'm not that crazy. And I'm not an old croc either, because I've lost weight.

56:25Gyles Brandreth: I'm improving my posture. Brilliant. And when you see me in my Henry Fielding costume... Wow. Move over, Larry Lamb. Henry Fielding's in town. Meanwhile, we're going to have lemon meringue pie, specially made for us by Harriet Jane. Cue the music and get out the Rennies.

56:48Harriet: And this is going to be a real disaster, Giles. No. Don't laugh. We're on a trip down memory lane. All this stuff's going to come out. It's sort of, it's kind of collapsed.

56:59Gyles Brandreth: Oh, darling.

57:00Harriet: It doesn't matter.

57:01Gyles Brandreth: I can see that bread liquid is spilling out of it all over the plate.

57:05Harriet: Oh. Oh, you never know. Well, that's okay.

57:09Gyles Brandreth: Give me the dryer plate, mate.

57:13Harriet: Oh, it's lemon, like lemon juice. Like lemon juice.

57:17Gyles Brandreth: You brought old tea. It's now collapsed totally. It's now collapsed completely. Oh, no.

57:21Harriet: Well, I'm going to make a new slice.

57:22Gyles Brandreth: I'm just showing the camera. I mean, to be honest, I don't want to be hurtful.

57:28Harriet: On Bake Off, this would be... This is comedy gold on Bake Off, isn't it? It's comedy gold, no.

57:32Gyles Brandreth: It's actually... I mean, I'm taking a photograph. I don't want to make you a person to tears because this is supposed to be a lovely sentimental trip down memory lane. Oh, gosh. The truth is, it is a disaster.

57:42Harriet: It is a disaster.

57:43Gyles Brandreth: The meringue hasn't stuck to the lemon. The lemon has melted. the pastry is a complete joke. That's it for this week. Thanks for being part of the Rosebud family.

58:19Thank you.

59:14Barbara Cartland: We'll see you next time. to program banks boost up to$150 ,000. Cash account offered by Wealthfront Brokerage LLC. Member FINRA SIPC, not a bank. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. Christian Bale was preparing for his role in American Psycho, dressing the part, hitting the gym for the first time in his life, even getting his teeth redone. There was just one problem. He didn't actually have the part. Leonardo DiCaprio did. Listen to our podcast, What Went Wrong, every week as we unearth the chaos behind Hollywood's biggest movie flops and most shocking successes.

59:56Barbara Cartland: Available wherever you get your podcasts.

1:00:02Barbara Cartland: Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com.