Adwoa Aboah

0:00This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed Human Welcome to Ruthie's Table 4 a production of iHeart Radio and Atomize Studios

0:13In September, the River Cafe will be 36 years old and one of the great joys of having a restaurant for so long is watching the second generation and now even a third generation of our early customers grow up Adwa's parents, Charles Eboa and Camilla Lowther have been part of the River Cafe family since we opened and Adwa has gone from being a young child ordering pasta, butter and cheese and then playing in the garden space outside with her friends to a formidable woman focused on the political and social issues relevant today after her own struggles with mental health and to support young women's well-being she founded the organization Girls Talk, providing a safe space for girls to access resources, share experiences, create community, and feel less alone, a place to escape the chaos of the everyday.

1:09I think a beautiful phrase. Today, Adwa's just come from the kitchen, grilling scallops and frying zucchini, and she's going to tell us what she learned and read the recipe so you can cook this at home. It's both moving and exciting for me to have Adwa here. Oh, that was so nice. So you've been in the kitchen. You've been in the River Cafe kitchen. Do you remember coming here as a child? My God, all the time. Little girl. All the time. Ronnie and Jonathan, they used to take us all the time. And you've just been in the kitchen. And so you watched, your request for the recipe was scallops, grilled scallops with chili and zucchini.

1:50eat. My name's Adriana and I'm a chef at the River Cafe and today I'm cooking some scallops on the grill. So first thing that... My name's Adjo and I'm not cooking anything on the grill. You can cook it with me if you want. Yeah, okay. Okay, cool. We put them in the center of the grill because that's the hottest place. How long do you have to leave them on for? Not very long at all. So you just keep them, don't move them around, keep them where they are and then they'll start kind of coming off. You can kind of look at the bottom and see how they're cooking. Because if you move them too quickly then they'll stick.

2:31Oh wow. And then we're going to get some fritti made. I think Harry you're doing fritti right? Can you drop some fritti for us please? So we have two recipes. One I think it's really for the batter for the zucchini, and then quite simple, the scallops. Scallops and zucchini fritti. Full, firm, ripe zucchini, one liter sunflower oil. For the batter, one cup all-purpose flour, three tablespoons extra virgin olive oil. I always get really confused at the tablespoon and teaspoon. Yeah, well, there is a difference. Like one is quite small. No, no, but like the way it's written. Yeah, because it goes T-B-S-P, that's tablespoon.

3:16And T-S-P is teaspoon. Yeah. Three tablespoons extra virgin olive oil, three tablespoons warm water, three egg whites. Scallops, 16 shelled sea scallops, two lemons, extra virgin olive oil. Cut the zucchini into ovals, then into thick matchsticks. For the batter, sift the flour into a bowl, making a well in the center. Pour in the olive oil and stir. Loosen the paste by slowly adding enough warm water to make a batter the consistency of heavy cream. Leave for 30 minutes. Heat the oil in a high-sided pan to 375 degrees. Beat the egg whites until stiff and fold into the batter. Dip zucchini, then fry in batches in hot oil until golden and crisp.

4:09Serve immediately. Scallops, heat the grill. Season the scallops very generously on both sides with salt and pepper. Actually, she said only salt and then pepper at the end. Don't put the pepper on. Yeah, it burns quickly, so put the pepper on afterwards. Place on the grill until lightly brown and crisp, then turn over the grill on the other side. The scallops should be tender on the inside and crisp on the surface. Serve with lemon and a drizzle of olive oil. And I had some chilli on mine. so do you have to plate it all up yes that's the really fun part about working here is that you get to plate all of your food because who would usually do that in like another restaurant you bring it up to the pass and maybe someone on the pass would plate it but here you get to do it and it gives you I mean for me it's really satisfying good portion here we go that's it Wow I'm coming here for dinner Tell me about going to Vogue with Edward because we did when Edward Enneville became the editor we did the party here do you remember that?

5:23We had a party for him It was a great party You were the cover for his first issue Yeah, that was mad that Vogue party I remember that like it was yesterday I remember us driving here and I, you know, Edward and I still laugh about it now. It's like, it wasn't naivety. I think it was just this, we were just doing something that felt very special to both of us. It was like this, we were embarking on this new journey and it wasn't necessarily that we were, we were completely naive to how the world was going to embrace it. You know, not only just people in fashion, but worldwide. You know, it really went viral, do you know what I mean, I think.

6:05and so as we kind of pulled up I pulled up I can't remember who I was in the car with maybe it was like my mom and dad and sister and we pulled up the shepherd's bush roundabout and it was projected on shepherd's bush roundabout what the hell is going on and I looked on my phone and it was just like going mad and I actually like broke out into hives I was like oh my god this is so much I don't even know how to like deal with the situation I pulled up to River Cafe and And Edwin and I just giggled. We could not stop laughing. I think we were both so overwhelmed by what had happened that we kind of just, like, could not stop laughing.

6:44It was mad. It still feels really mad. We all had ravioli. We had this long discussion before whether all the Vogue people, the models and the actresses and the young beauties of today would actually have gluten, carbs, cheese, butter, and whether we would serve it. And we did. And Bo was actually really cool because we said, do you want to find out what people want to eat? And they go, no, we're done with that. We're done with, you know, if you have a food preference. We're just going to do the menu and what they eat. And everybody had ravioli and everybody, a lot of people had seconds of ravioli.

7:21And yet the whole issue of being a model about your body, Talk about being a woman in a profession that requires you to be a certain shape and size. I think, I don't remember being worried. I think there were moments when I was at school where I was kind of worried about what I looked like. Sometimes I didn't, I wasn't at a girls school, but you know, I lived in a house full of women. So sometimes when someone would get a bit weird with food or they'd have issues, it kind of sometimes bleeds into everyone else within the community. Do you know what I mean? We see that all the time. And I think when I started modeling, I don't, again, remember feeling that pressured about it.

8:09I think I just felt incredibly painful in my own body in general. So it wasn't necessarily weight-related. I think there's always been parts of my body that I haven't loved, and I've had to grow to love. Are you the kind of person that can eat but not gain weight? Yeah, because I've always done lots and lots of sports. But were other models that you were with, did you feel that to be a model you had to be a sport? Yeah, I got weird with food for a period of time. Actually, when I got sober, and they call that transference, I think I was just trying to control something else in my life. So I got a bit weird with food when I was about 22.

8:51I think it was just control, to be quite honest. And I think, wait for me. You know, if I'm, I suffer with anxiety, you know, and so when I'm anxious, it just falls off. It falls off, yeah. I'm not the type of person, sometimes I am eating, but it literally just falls off all the time. So sometimes I haven't even been, like, aware of, like, dropping weight. I think I've always done a lot of exercise and kind of now do Pilates. So I used to build a lot of muscle. So my body has changed, like, you know, over the course of, like, many years, I think. And so I think when I got started modeling properly, I decided there was a part of me that had that to do it, to really kind of walk into it again.

9:51I had to take on, it was almost like a, it wasn't necessarily that I felt like that, but I had to be like, this is who I am, do you know what I mean? Like, take it or leave it, do you know what I mean? I'm not going to be sucked into this idea that I should be thinner or look a different sort of way for you to kind of appreciate me or want me. So I had to, and that's not exactly how I felt all the time, but I had to sort of fake it to make it. So it wasn't necessarily, I think I've always, I don't know, I was speaking on my own podcast about this the other day. I think, I wonder if my relationship with myself will ever be what I want it to be whilst I model.

10:41I don't know if my, I have a, to a certain extent, a healthy relationship with myself. But I wonder if my relationship with my body will ever be what I want it to be as long as I'm kind of within the industry. And yes, it has changed like drastically. Do you know what I mean? the likes of amazing people spearheading different sorts of movements. But, you know, we only have to kind of look at certain photos or fashion shows and we see the kind of pressure that's put on us. I almost find it painful. I haven't been to that many catwalk shows. I think it probably has, Jane. When you see, you know, how thin and kind of serious and, you know, I know it's there to just showcase the clothes, and so it's like being a hanger.

11:32But there is something as a woman to see women doing that job. It's a little bit distressing. Yeah, and also when you know that someone's kind of unwell, whatever that looks like for different people, when you know someone's kind of suffering with disordered eating, but they are praised and celebrated within the industry and they work even more, it's that in itself is an uncomfortable thing to get your head around i think that's where sometimes the pressure for me lies it isn't that i want to be unwell it's just the fact that i see people doing well because of it do you know i mean and that's a that's that's a mad thing to get your head around do you know i mean and it's and i don't think that kind of breeds um healthy ways of looking at yourself, you know, if you're being told that you are better for being thin.

12:27And I suppose the other, you know, we haven't talked about, we've talked about body image and modeling, we haven't talked about race. And I think that there is also the issue of what it was like to be or what it is like to be a woman of color in a very, what was, thanks to Edward, it's not so much and people like Edward but how that affected you? I think that's something that I'm really delving into at the moment is how a lack of understanding about my own identity has really kind of hindered certain aspects of my growth do you know I mean and having been brought up in a predominantly white space what that how that has affected me how the things that I've tolerated the things that I've kind of brushed off and I think because of the resurgence of Black Lives Matter the conversations that they were having it kind of it really kind of shook people's core it wasn't that we were just talking about slavery something that happened you know years and years ago when people many years I know but for certain people like they weren't around where they happened when that happened so they were like oh I wasn't part of that I mean I would I I didn't do anything like that.

13:39And I think Black Lives Matter kind of brought it, made it current. And suddenly you were kind of, they were speaking about things that you had to check yourself on. And I had to, suddenly was, I think, validated in a lot of experiences and feelings that I had surrounding my own race and how I'd had to kind of navigate certain situations. And also I think I was, also my privilege, you know, we talk about colorism within the community as being someone who's like mixed race and lighter skin the way that I was treated compared to um my cousins who are you know who are a lot darker skin than me you know I think that's a conversation that we don't have enough either um but um for me I think it was great you know when Edward started doing what he was doing what he does and continues to do and sets the bar so high continuously.

14:37I think for me, it had always been unspoken how uncomfortable I'd felt in certain situations. It was almost that I didn't want to give it a name. It's like, I felt that there were certain reasons why my career hadn't taken off. You know, when I'd started with certain people, you know, who looked very different to me, I think I still was searching for something that was completely unattainable, different hair, different body shape, you know, sometimes even like, you know, different coloured skin, you know. And so I think I didn't want to blame it on something like that. I was like, why? You know, I started at the same time as Cara.

15:19I started at the same time as so many girls and they kind of reached such great heights. I was like, why is that? Do you know what I mean? I think it was quite nice when Edward, There was many things that were beautiful about it, but having him come in and be like, we've got to change that. This is what is going on, do you know what I mean? Were you born here or in Ghana? Yeah, yeah, born in London. And your father is? Yeah, Ghanaian. He was born in Accra. So going back was part of your childhood? Yeah, very much so. It was always something that we did. Sometimes my mum came, and sometimes it was just the three of us.

15:54And I think it felt quite alien at that time, and as I grew older and kind of my career changed and obviously I became like a grown-up, my relationship with Ghana very much changed. I felt like kind of, instead of just a kind of traveller, someone who'd like been born in London and who'd come back to Ghana, I felt like they really claimed me, which was really like a kind of beautiful experience, you know. I think especially after the British Vogue cover, you know, it was like they call you a Bruni, which means like a kind of traveller because I'm obviously a little paler skin than most Garniers.

16:29And I think after that, I felt very much kind of claimed by the people there, which was really, really amazing. But I have the most amazing memories of Ghana. We always used to stay at my grandma and granddad's. It's just a modest house next to a nursery. So there were always kids playing outside. My grandma has always had a little kind of corner shop, So we'd go in there, get our, like, cold bottles of, like, Coke and, like, biscuits. Then we'd sit there and watch her and my Aunt Mary. All three of them lived together. So we'd watch them do their thing. Did you cook? Did she cook for you? Yeah, she cooked.

17:10And then she had a woman who also helped her comfort. What is Ghanaian food like? It's amazing. I mean, you've got the jollof rice. You've got lots of different kind of fish. You've got fufu. What's fufu? So it's like a kind of dough that you dip into a soup. The spice there is kind of like, it's like an oily one. It's amazing. And chili. Yeah. A lot of chili? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And fish? Really spicy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Did you go to the market? Yeah. God, the markets are mad. Are they? Mad. Like insane. Just like bustling food, clothes. People wandering around. It's like mental, but amazing.

17:56And how long would you stay? We'd stay for like two weeks. I have some cousins who usually stay there a bit longer. Dad and my sister were there this year. My dad goes back all the time. He does. All the time. My granddad's not alive anymore. My Aunt Mary, she's not alive anymore. But my grandma is very much still there. And my Aunt Tina lives with her. So what was it like growing up in your house? You have memories of meals, you know, cooked. My house has always been a place that is kind of people are in and out at all times. You know, I very much grew up with maybe it was someone who had to move in for a bit.

18:40You know, my godfather would move in or someone in, you know, distress would be upstairs living in an upstairs room. there were always parties and dinner parties and lots of different people kind of in and out of the house my mum has always been like an entertainer my dad as well the home has always been one that kind of it feels like sacred but they're not precious about it a place that people want to come to the carpets are rolled up when a party happens but they've never been kind of like prim and popper about their places. And were you kids part of it? Yeah. You weren't sitting on the steps watching the party go on.

19:24You were down there. No, we'd be down there. We'd do things like coat check. Yeah. Yeah. And we'd charge everyone money. And then they'd find all their coats just piled up on one bed, pretending like we'd organize them. Or we'd be sat on the staircase watching everyone get up to whatever mischief they were getting up to. and then later on we were just joining in. Would you go out a lot? Would you go out to restaurants? Yeah, we do such amazing things, you know. What did you do? That's the thing about growing up in London. It's like, I mean, I wouldn't want to bring my children out anywhere else.

20:00I loved it. Galleries and restaurants and they took us everywhere. It was never about separation. It was like, you want to sit with the grown-ups, you learn how to sit with the grown-ups, you you know learn how to converse and listen and talk to whoever might be next to you or in front of you but it was never like my parents were never into the idea of like putting you on the kids table yeah you know if we were younger it was like come out enjoy yourself when you get tired just sleep under the table yeah yeah do you know what I mean and then we'll go home and then you went away to boarding school yeah yeah what was that like the food yeah horrible horrible and Millfield was it Millfield yeah I was meant to be rather proud of it, but it was terrible.

20:45I mean, do you know what? Maybe this is my snobby side. I'm not great with a buffet. I think school kind of, like, traumatized me from that. I mean, some days it would be good. Like, the salad station was, like, banging. Like, that was good. But to be quite honest, I lived off Domino's for, like, five years. Oh, you were allowed to? No, you weren't. We weren't allowed, but we'd, like, sneak it in. And then in prep, we'd, like, run out and get the pizza and bring it back in and all share it. On Fridays, we were allowed to order an Indian or a Chinese. Yeah, interesting. So that must have been quite shocking to go from a house that was full of people and friends and good food.

21:26Yeah, I think it was also, I mean, there were certain days where it was good. Chinese day wasn't that bad. Indian day wasn't that bad. How old were you? 13 to 18. That was five years you were at? Yeah. And then you'd come back weekends or would you stay? Well, you were only allowed, what do they call it? I can't remember what they used to call. Exeat. Exeat. Yeah. You were only allowed a certain amount of exeats, but I had the best housemistress on the face of the planet, Mrs. Orton. And she, I was really homesick. Yeah. I mean, I kind of got over it, but it wasn't my favorite of years being at that school.

22:08I had some great friends, but I was just desperate to come back to London. Then from Millfield, you went to university. What was that like? Brunel, yeah. Where is Brunel? That's in Uxbridge. I mean, I tried to get into Goldsmiths. I failed my English exam. I can't remember which one it was because you realise that it really doesn't matter. No, definitely. Yeah. But I'm just telling you. I mean, try your best, do all the things, but don't put that much pressure on yourself. We're here with a friend of mine's daughter, the head executive chef's daughter, Pearl Palena. Pearl joined us today because she's a 15-year-old aspiring actor.

22:49She's an enormous admirer of your work. I can't believe Pearl's 15, though. Oh, no, no, no. There you go, there you go. And so we were talking about whether university matters. So what was that like? Obviously wanted to save money, so lived at home. But were you happy then? Yeah, I had the best time. Did you? Why? Because I think it was just, I was back home. I was back in London. I was back, it was more, it was predominantly, I mean, Millfield was very kind of like intersectional, do you know what I mean, in many ways, but it was predominantly white. And I think coming back to London, it wasn't just the kind of necessarily race.

23:27It was also a boiling pot of people who've grown up differently, do you know what I mean? It was like, I'd grown up completely different to a lot of the people in my kind of class, but I just felt like that was just more me. I just wanted to be amongst that. So living at home, did it come back? Did it feel like before you went to Melbourne, you were back to being a child again? No, it was very weird. I wouldn't say it was a great time for mine and my parents' relationship. I think they thought sending me to boarding school, there would be more rules. but actually when someone doesn't know you like a teacher you can get around them do I mean like actually you've kind of weirdly got more space to roam um and so coming back to London obviously there were certain rules but I think if I was honest and I've you know I've spoken to them about this anyway I think coming back home after five years I was a bit like you can't really tell me what to do do I mean I like we haven't lived together for five years so I think that dynamic was quite hard on our relationship.

24:38I think I probably regressed. I think I wasn't used to the fact that I was back living under their roof and I was very much a different person. I remember once saying to my father, I might have said this before, saying to my father when I was 30 or 28 or whatever and I'd been living in London and working and my parents lived in upstate New York in Woodstock. And I once went home and I said to my dad, oh, I'm going to leave the baby and go into New York tomorrow. And he said, I don't think you should do that. And I said, you know what, I live in London and I work and I don't have to ask anybody's, you know, nice way of saying permission, but it's interesting that when, you know, I go home, I don't know whether I'm a child or I'm an adult.

25:24And he said, I'll make it really easy for you. The minute you walk in that door, you're a child. And it was actually quite nice because I thought that's kind of why I like going home, you know, is it suddenly somebody's saying, you know, no, why don't you stay here, or whatever, it was just interesting. It's like a dance, isn't it, you have to learn how to live with each other again.

25:54When you went to Brunel, what were you thinking of majoring, what was your... Theatre, yeah, that's what I finished, that's what I majored in. Did you eat out a lot? Did you party? Yeah, I went out all the time. Did you? All the time. I mean, we were so funny. What year was this? I was 18. And you were born in 1994. 1992. So what, did I finish school? 2010. We had the best time. I worked as soon as I kind of finished school. Modelling? There were bits of modelling, but it wasn't, it was like a different time, do you know what I mean? So I worked in a shop, I worked as a nanny. But we were so, we had so much fun, do you know what I mean?

26:38We was like, I don't know how it is for you, Pearl, but we just, we were so carefree and mad and doing our thing. But you were probably 18. Yeah, and we all pile our money. Yeah, you know what I mean? But I mean, just being, but I just mean being young, do you know what I mean? It's like, we weren't bothered about kind of what clothes we were wearing or anything like that. We didn't have the pressure of social media or anything like that. It was just about being in a gang, do you know what I mean, and roaming the streets. Mostly girls, or was it? Yeah, mostly. I've always been a girls' girl. And we'd all put our money together and share one meal, like poor restaurants where we'd just sit for hours and hours and hours outside kind of coffee shops sharing one coffee between five of us.

27:23And they're like, can you leave if you're not going to buy anything? Can you leave? or we'd go to like kind of my friend Josh Delissa who might as well be my brother he had a restaurant called Boom Burger we'd go in there get cheap prices we had some Mexican restaurants around the area and we'd all put our money together to share like kind of one plate of food because I mean we were quite naughty we were spending our money on like alcohol and going out so we didn't really have a massive interest in spending our money on food. So modeling when did that happen? And how did that happen? I mean, I've been modeling on and off since I was probably, since I left school.

28:01So since I was 18, I did a few bits and pieces like before, but my mom was very strict about, and my dad as well, about finishing school. Modeling kind of took quite a long time to kind of take off. So that's why I kind of worked. Did you enjoy it? Yeah, I did. Did you like the process? I think I've learnt to like it more. I learnt to like it when I, as cheesy as this sounds, when I started to like myself, to be quite honest. Do you know what I mean? That's when it became more fun. And yes, there are days when I'm on my period or I'm a bit exhausted when I'm like, this is literally the last thing I want to do.

28:40Do you know what I mean? It is be like kind of showcased in front of a bunch of people and then kind of, it's like Instagram have to kind of, and then I start picking apart my kind of who I am do you know I mean face value not who I am as a person actually but can I ask a question yeah what made you want to do a podcast I think it goes back to this this idea of storytelling I think and the information out there on what lived experience does in regards to stigma reduction and suicide reduction um and so So I couldn't think of a better place. There's something about an honest conversation, an honest chat.

29:22Intimate, isn't it? Yeah, there's so much intimacy within that and to just listen to someone. And I think it really was that. It's like to talk to someone, to hear their side of a story, to hear where they've come from and where they're at and where they hope to be. I think that's definitely the essence of having the podcast is that idea that when we hear someone else's story, we're going to feel less alone. So you were talking about Girls Talk. Tell me when the next series that you're so excited about is coming out. So podcast, I'd say just keep a lookout. It'll be towards the end of the year.