174: Sam’s big update and Pete’s a hero!

0:00Thank you for calling the Bombas Comfort Line. Bombas make socks, slippers, tees, and underwear made with the highest quality materials. Press 1 for comfort, 2 for style, 3 for donation. You chose style. Bombas is styles for whatever you enjoy. You can run in Bombas, lounge in Bombas, dress them up, dress them down, but always give back in Bombas. Because with every item purchased, another is donated. Bombas, comfort worth calling for. Go to bombas.com slash audio and use code audio for 20 % off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S dot com and use code audio. Hi, I'm Angie Hicks, co-founder of Angie.

0:32And one thing I've learned is that you buy a house, but you make it a home. Because with every fix, update, and renovation, it becomes a little more your own. So you need all your jobs done well. For nearly 30 years, Angie has helped millions of homeowners hire skilled pros for the projects that matter. From plumbing to electrical, roof repair to deck upgrades. So leave it to the pros who will get your jobs done well. Angie, the one you trust to find the ones you trust. Find a pro for your project at Angie.com. This episode is sponsored by ZocDoc. Have you been putting off a doctor's appointment or need a dentist and don't know where to start?

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2:21and Kira's YouTube channel for 5pm on Wednesday. And then there'll be a bonus episode, a very special bonus episode this week, which will come out Thursday audibly. And then you'll be able to watch that from 5pm on Sunday on Josh and Kira's YouTube channel, which means you can catch us on a... Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Sunday. Wonderful. Before we get started, make sure you follow, subscribe, at Staying With The Pod, all of that sort of crap. You know the score by now. And whilst we're at it and we're doing the housekeeping, because we know we love a bit of house. Cleaning house? Yes, we're cleaning house.

2:54Sweeping. If you haven't already, and even if you have, do it again. Vote for us from the Trick Awards. Oh, yeah, please. We really want to do a speech so badly. Me and Pete want to get up there. Sam wants to have another go at doing a speech because last year he was so excited he forgot to talk and just went thanks and handed over to me. Quick tug on the bollocks. Yeah, quick tug on the bollocks. And this year he's actually going to prepare something. So we would like to make it two years in a row since we don't have much luck at the British Podcast Awards because they hate us. They do. They really do hate us.

3:24But we love Trick. They've actually put up a video today. Have they? Yes. Yeah. How's everyone's commute going? Okay. Yes. If you are on the tube listening to this, then good on you. Talking of April Fools, because that is when we were recording this, just in case you weren't aware, and this is specifically for you, Helena, we haven't actually done Fake Tan. Oh, yeah. just a little joke yeah although I actually do want to do a fake tan line funny enough Sam has spoken about this previously to me do I want to go in on the fake tan line what would you call it I actually really like staying tanned that wasn't my idea that was the team's idea but I think it's a fucking cool name and I genuinely want in all seriousness to start a fake tan line for men and women started by me and Pete Wicks yeah I'm not gonna do it no he said no so far but that's not a definite no it's just like a maybe not.

4:17Well, based on what we just said about the Trick Awards, which obviously we want to win another award, there are no prizes for second place. Yeah. But we have recently come second in an awards. Well done, everybody. By a very well-known company called Casino Kings, who have created the Profanity Index, which ranks podcasts based on their volume of swearing. Now, I cannot believe that we didn't win that. I know. I think it's a fucking disaster that we didn't win that. We lost to My Therapist Ghosted Me, co-hosted by Vogue Williams and Joanne McNally, who topped the list. I can't believe that. So across the episodes analysed, it's how many swears there were per 10 ,000 words, which typically equates to around 60 to 75 minutes of talking.

5:11We came in in second. we racked up 402 swear words across the analysed episodes, which is roughly 58 per 10 ,000 words. That's actually quite low. It's very low. Fucking... Up those... Shit... Turbo... Bloody... Slag... Silly... Fucker... Prick... Twat... Bellend... Fuck... Not nice people. Yeah. In third place, Friends of ours, The Buckleys, which was co-hosted by James Buckley and his wife Claire, They got 311 swears, which is 51 per 10 ,000 words. Yeah, rookie numbers. Rookie numbers. So we are looking to actually win the Profanity Index if Casino Kings are still going at this time next year.

5:54We are indeed. And so if you could vote for us on that. It's not a vote, is it? It's not a vote. No, no, it's down to us, mate. We just swear more. So say we're going to fuck you. You bloody buggers. So, Sam, staying relevant. Peter, you are back. Where am I back from? Well, you came straight here from... Oh, yeah. I'm back on Hits Radio Breakfast there we go yeah yeah yeah he's a breakfast man I'm a breakfast show host everybody yeah yeah how have the early mornings been oh they've been absolutely brilliant they've been no they've been really hard yeah he's mentioned it a couple of times no I don't talk about it listen you say you don't talk about it no not having that no Pippa do I do I talk relentlessly what yeah Sam literally before we pressed record you're like I'm just so tired I'm just so tired yeah you'll just never understand how tiring it is Pippa only worked on Breakfast Radio for two years she'll never understand.

6:42Yeah. Also, also, yeah, what we've had is I've done a full day's work before I've come here. So. It's so true. You know what I mean? Guys, guys, guys, I've done a full day's work since I've been here. What time do you normally get up? I normally get up and around, my alarm goes off a quarter to seven normally. Okay. And what time are you up for breakfast radio? 4.30. 4.30. 4.30 wake up. I know it's not the earliest, earliest, but it's just like, I only got two hours sleep the night before. Why was that? Because up all night, I don't know, because I have a setting on my sleep circuit where if I can't get past, if I get past a certain time, which is 10.30, and I don't get to sleep, I can't sleep all night.

7:25What? Yeah, basically, if I get past a certain time at the night. What, and your body just sort of goes, well, there's no point now. Genuinely, yes. My brain just completely fries and goes, no. And then my brain starts playing music to myself in my head. does that happen to you? over and over and over again what's the brain playlist? oh mate recently it was that Dracula song

7:53we're starting to understand you a little bit more now so let me get this right if you sort of happen you get in bed you check your watch, your phone and it says 10.31 and then from that point for the rest of the night it's going on in your head exactly that Dracula Do you know what I found really weird recently? This is what? Well, that's not what you find weird. No, that's just like, that's happened to my whole life. This, and then, do you know what? To get to sleep and to get that music out of my head, I've been, I sing a song to me. No, I don't have a wank. Haven't had a wank for a while, actually.

8:24That wasn't the wank. That's, that's wank. That's. Oh, well, my girlfriend's away. But she's back tonight. Whee! Whee! Summer's not going to be sleepy for another reason. Whee! Gonna be honest with you. Might get a tickle. might get a tickle okay yeah might get a little tickle you know what is crazy though mate my knees are sweating a lot at the moment I'm getting really sweaty knees at night is that oh okay I wake up but only my knees sweat right what you just have two little damp spots under the back of the neck I can't stand it and they're soaking wet so my knees are sweating but nothing else is but why I mean have you looked into it no because I don't want to chat GPT it's going to freak me out so how has Breakfast Radio actually been then you've interviewed everyone you know.

9:08Yeah, I know. Vicky was in yesterday. Just got your pals in. Yeah. Jamie and Sophie came in. Jamie and Sophie came in. We had a chat. They put a pregnancy machine on me. Apparently, that pregnancy machine, which is really tough to do, by the way, apparently that's literally like the smallest contraction for a girl, a lady who's giving birth. Listen, obviously as a man, I'm not going to begin to say it's harder, but there is no way for us to prove that. I could not believe. I'm just saying no I'm not saying I'm just saying we can't prove that Pete's the kind of person where the girl goes oh my god I feel really ill he goes have you had enough water no no no Jamie and Sophie came in and it was really nice we were talking about their new show and then Vicky was in Vicky and Erkan oh so you did two lots of couples I did two lots of couples both talking about their new baby shows as well yeah because you've got you know Vicky and Erkan I actually feature in the first ever no you do not Yeah, of course I do.

10:04She came to me for some advice. They were so nice. Vicky's such a nice girl. She's great, isn't she? She's great. Urquhain was really good as well, actually, to be fair. Lovely guy. And we played that game where it's like, tell off your kids if they've come back and they've done something bad. Ooh, nice. Yeah. When she goes Geordie, wow, it's scary. Frightening. Terrifying. Okay, so anyone else you've got lined up to interview? Because you're doing it for the whole week. Yeah, and then next week as well, actually. Oh, so you've got two weeks? Two weeks. How are you going to manage? Oh, my God, guess who we're interviewing next week?

10:31the Furies, but not Tyson, Paris Fury and Venezuela. I know, I didn't think it was a real name either, but here we are. Like, Venezuela. I probably, you know, just a little bit of advice. Who's getting married? She's 16. Yeah, a little bit of advice. I wouldn't go in with I didn't think that was a real name or the shock of her being married at 16. Oh, I was going to go in and be like, so 16, bit young. I wouldn't. I, I wouldn't. No. No. No. No. Thank God you told me that. No. How are you going to, like, okay, so, hi, Venezuela. Hi, Venezuela. Do you want me to be Venezuela? Yeah, yeah. So I'm Venezuela.

11:12And Paris. Yeah, I can't be two. Okay, fine. This isn't, do you know what I mean? I'm not James Backerboy. This isn't Split. I'd be like, great movie. I'd be like, hey, Venezuela, how are you? So. Now I'm panicking. So, Venezuela. So congratulations on the marriage. She's just had her hen do, actually, apparently as well. How was the hen? This seems so weird. Just had her hen do. How was the hen? They went to play bar. Yeah, so I don't know what you'd do at 16 on a hen do. Like, you're not sending this, are you? Are you? Can you? No. How old can you drink? 18. 18. Oh, right, okay. That's boggling my mind.

11:56So your hen do, obviously, you couldn't drink. I, yeah. First question. So Henry couldn't drink. What did you get up to? If, just for anyone listening, when are you doing this? It's next week. Next week. Listen to it. Listen, if ever you needed a plug for an interview, this be it. And I'm cool. Paris, how do you feel about it? Yeah, Paris, how do you feel about it? Like, you must be over the moon. You get to walk your daughter down the aisle. No, that's Tyson doing that. So Paris, you get to watch Tyson walk Venezuela down the aisle. and like that must be a real amazing moment were you on the hen do like what happened there um the furies are coming out basically that's why we're doing the interview so it's it's meet the furies uh or party with the furies or um i will do the research before i do it obviously this is next week so yeah yeah yeah you've got quite done the research yet time for the research uh yeah feature with the furies at home with the furies at home with the furies but i'm very excited because apparently it's a huge show and they are very interesting and apparently they're very lovely as well actually.

13:03So very excited for that. It's going to be very, very nice. Apparently she makes a lovely trifle, Paris, as well. Oh, I love a trifle. Have you ever had a trifle? No, I've never had a trifle. Trifle, trifle. I've never had a trifle. Trifle? I was really clutching this seat. It's a trifle. So do you know what's in a trifle? Meat? No. No. Meat. Isn't it like a cottage pie? No, it's not. It's not. Sam, describe to me your ideal trifle. Whipped cream, mincemeat. Okay, sorry. Whipped cream and mincemeat. Beef and cream. Yeah, with peas in it. Do you think it's a shepherd's pie with cream on top? Cream, yeah.

13:51I'll tell you how I know that. You don't know that? I do know that. I do know that. I'll tell you exactly how, because I just watched it in Friends. But he got it wrong. No, he didn't. Did he get it wrong? Yeah, he did. The pages were stuck together. Motherfucker. I spent my entire life thinking that's what a trifle was. No. So a trifle is jelly. It's a dessert. Jelly, custards. You do have cream, and you actually use, like, sponge little kind of cake things, which are actually called lady fingers. Oi. Just saying. But, yeah, it's sponge, jelly, custard, whipped cream. Yeah. It's really lovely.

14:26You can put a bit of vanilla essence in there. Amaretto's quite nice in it. I quite like it with rum. How many lady fingers do you like? As many as I can get in. The whipped creamier, the better. No? Okay, that's where we draw the line. So, excellent. All right, cool. I wish you didn't know that, because I wish you'd gone home and told Tally that you'd made her a trifle and just put together some peas, mints, and a dollop of cream on top. We're going to game together, actually, tonight, I think, if I get home in time, yeah. Is that Inuit? No, no, we're actually going to play on the PlayStation.

15:01Who are you looking down at the camera like that for? She's been away, hasn't she? Yeah. First time you've seen her? Yeah. So she's been away for a few days. God, do you know what I can't wait to do? Game. You're going to game together? Is she a gamer? Yeah. No, she's not. Or is she just doing this to get, like, because it's... No, no, no, she is. She's playing Mariko all the time. So I was like, oh, that'd be quite a fun date night. You're so sweet, the pair of you. I can't even take the piss because it's I mean that is quite cute you're gonna fuck after yeah I think so yeah alright okay yeah we're gonna bump and grind yeah that's actually genuine what I say but obviously all of this is gonna happen before 10.30 because that's when he has to get married otherwise that Dracula song again so would you say you're more of a morning person or a night owl I'm definitely a morning person and what's your bedtime routine because I know you've got a routine oh my yeah yeah okay so So for me, I like to have dinner around 6.30 to 7pm.

15:58Has to be at that point. And is that, so when you say you like to have dinner at 6.30 to 7, is that sort of you want to cook it and eat it within that half hour period? I hope at 7.30 latest. For finishing of the meal. Finishing the meal, yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. And then I go and have a shower whilst the food's on. Wear a bib. I go and have the shower and the food's on. And then I go and do my face. and so I go and put my Le Maire on. I've just bought Le Maire. Explain to everyone what Le Maire is. So Le Maire is this facial cream. Extremely expensive. Mate, it's massive. This is what I was going to say.

16:33So, my man's moved on from Nivea. Mate, this facial stuff. Pippa, how much? Le Maire moisturising cream, £1 ,105 from Cult Beauty. Okay. For 250 millilitres. Let me explain to you. I go into Space NK, right? Because I need some face cream. We're not getting any younger. I'd like some face cream. What's wrong with Tesco? I don't know, because Space NK was right next to me. And Tally was like, it's a great place to go. Tally did warn me as I walked in. She went, look, they're going to try and do you here. So like, just like the people who work in here, they're going to try and like. You got someone, you asked someone, that was the problem.

17:10Mate, so I went in and she went, I'm going to have you back here because they're going to see you coming from a mile off. So I walk in and I went, I just want to look younger. I went, I want the wrinkles to go, and I want to look younger, and I want a day routine and a night routine. Did you by any chance have the Rolex on? No, I didn't, no. The guy came over to me, skipping over, and he went, sir, follow me. And I was like, okay, this is great, amazing service. Tally's then, to be fair, he's gone straight for the Le Maire. And Tally's gone, no, we're not going to be taking the Le Maire. And I went, whoa, whoa, Tally, why are you saying that?

17:41Don't be rude. I was like, let the man show us. No idea the price. She went, Sam, it's so expensive. I went, it can't be that bad. It's absolutely fine. Is that the best one? He went, yeah. I was like, okay, we'll take Le Maire. And then I was like, well, actually, I need some serum. He went, well, sir, Le Maire again. So he pulls down this other Le Maire thing. I was like, okay, cool. This is amazing. Tally's literally tugging me at the back, being like, you've got to stop. I was like, no thing that comes in a tub that small is that expensive. And so I was like, I'm going to be fine. We go over to fucking till.

18:11It's 1 ,300 pounds for three items of Le Maire. then you know when you're there and I'm like I'm giving it the big one already I'm like yeah I can't wait to use this on my face you've already told your bird to shut up and so I've literally I've gone so deep that he goes and he talks to me as if it's normal he goes yeah so that will come to£1 ,300 sir and I literally you know when like he says it so conversationally that I was just like like fuck I don't know what like and then Tally's like looking at me now like go on what are you going to do now mate and so like I pulled out my card I was like shaking.

18:47I went, yeah, it's fine. It's fine. He goes, would you like some points on that, sir? And I was like, what do you mean points? And Tanya was like, I'll take the points. So she took the points and I had to pay. I have never, and I do mean this, I have never felt so robbed in my entire life. How long have you been using LeMay? I actually called my agent and went, we need to work, boys. I said, we've got to work. How long have you been using it? A week. A week. And have you noticed a difference? No. So 7.30, latest for dinner. During that period, you have had a shower. You have put on your La Mer 1300 pound face cream.

19:23What happens after dinner? You're showered, you're ready. Your face is radiantly taking in the money. You've eaten. I normally then, I play with the cats for about at least half an hour because I feel bad for them because I'm not home enough. Will you specifically set out cat playing time? Cat playing time. And what sort of games do you play? Like Monopoly? No, I've got a little thing on a string that I like they chase after. On a string? Yeah, and then I like, just sort of like, they love springs. So I go springies and like throw the springs at them and like they skid down the ground. Play fetch with a cat.

19:52Yeah, exactly. And they actually do, cats do play fetch, which is wild. And so I play with them for half an hour because otherwise they just don't really get any human interaction like if I haven't been there for the day. So I just feel like I should. And then after that, me and Tally, if Tally's there, sit down, settle down, watch the series. I'm watching 90210 with her now at the moment. Yeah, not my go-to. Yeah, but she wants to watch it, so I watch it with her, and I'm now obsessed. It's fucking brilliant. Okay, so a little bit of TV time. A little bit of TV time. And then I go to bed at 9.30.

20:23Nice. Yeah, and that's me. That's me done. That's my night, and that's my perfect evening. Nice, I like it. All right, okay. So it's not too much of a routine. What's yours? I mean, it's quite structured. Yeah. I'll be honest with you. It's sort of quiet by this time, by this time. I have to. That's my brain. I don't know whether it's ADHD or autism. It's one of the two. Everything has to be at the exact right time. Okay. All right. I mean, I get home from work. I'll take the dogs out and stare at a walker bed. But not before you've had your strawberry sort of twirly-wurly. I might have a cornet on.

20:57You'll have a cornet on. What we would all do. If I sit and watch, you know, obviously I've just finished Yellowstone, but I might watch an episode of Yellowstone. And I'll sit in silence for a little bit. I like a bit of peace. I might do, you know, get on the laptop, do some bits or whatever else. Just fumble around, really, for a couple of hours. And then, yeah, so take the dogs out just before bed. So about 11 o 'clock, 12 o 'clock, I'll take the dogs out. That's late, isn't it? Bloody hell. Well, it's just this. Oh, I'm having a panic attack if that's me. Why? Well, mate, because then you've got it.

21:31Your heart's gone a bit because you're working. My heart's gone? Well, no, because you're just walking. Where's it gone? You're walking around. It comes with me. Yeah, I know if you're walking around the plot, you're a bit knackered after that, probably. I've got a Rottweiler. Yeah, that's what I mean. He's dragging you all over the gap. No, he's calm at that point because he just wants to go to bed. Oh, right. Okay, fine. So you've dragged the Rottweiler out. Yeah, yeah, take the dogs out. And then I'll get in bed and I'll just lay there aimlessly until I hopefully fall asleep at some point. And how do you sleep?

21:56Not very well. Are you a side sleeper, a back sleeper, a face forward on the pillow sleeper? Either I'll put two pillows so there's a gap in the middle and go face down, arm side. Yeah. Or I sleep like that. Holding your bollocks? Well, just... Just protecting, just in case someone comes in. Holding the ghoulies. I think. But then I wake up in a different... How do you wake up? Diagonally across the bed. My feet are always off the bed. I'm probably... The bed stops there and I've got that much of my leg off the bed. Always, both legs. So I don't know what I do in my sleep. Do you know what I think we should do for this part?

22:32No, we're not filming me asleep. there's nearly there's an app that you can play when you're when you're asleep and it records anything that happens at night so it's when people snore or they've got they sleep talk and they want to they want to see whether they do we should do that for both of us and see if one we snore and two whether we sleep talk I don't think I sleep talk you wouldn't know I do well I've you know I've I've slept with a few people mate I've never been told I sleep talk I do snore but I dribble I'm a dribbler you're a dribbler if I'm on my front I dribble. Wow. That's fascinating.

23:07Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm a dribbler. So onto something that I think is big news that we've all been wondering because we've spoken a lot on this pod. It has kind of become a place where we don't just talk about kind of staying relevant. We've really branched down into, you know, based on the mere beauty fashion, those sort of things. We've spoken multiple times about your glow up. We've spoken about your outfits. we've now speaking about your skincare but something that has cropped up that everyone has been wondering and has kept us in comments non-stop is what's next for the hair because you have spoken about the hair and I understand that you phoned Pippa and gave her a bit of an update and a possible for summer I don't know if you're happy to reveal you are a sneaky sausage as far as I'm aware and I've heard a source has told me that you are thinking of going back blonde

24:05This episode is sponsored by ZocDoc. Have you been putting off a doctor's appointment or need a dentist and don't know where to start? You've definitely been there and that's why we use ZocDoc. Actually, over the holidays, Michael had a dental emergency and seemingly every office was closed. But we hopped onto ZocDoc, found an in-network dentist, had great reviews, saw real-time appointments available, which was key. It was on New Year's Day and booked an appointment in just minutes. It took so much of the stress out of the already stressful situation. ZocDoc makes it easy to search and compare over 250 ,000 local in-network providers across more than 200 specialties.

24:47So you can find the right doctor or dentist and book instantly. Ready to be seen. Download the ZocDoc app today and book that appointment on your to-do list. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C. ZocDoc.

25:21Seals are on now at Lowe's. In-store and online. Valid through 916, while supplies last. Selection varies by location. See Lowe's.com for more details. Thank you for calling the Bombas Comfort Line. Bombas make socks, slippers, tees, and underwear made with the highest quality materials. Press 1 for comfort, 2 for style, 3 for donation. You chose style. Bombas is styles for whatever you enjoy. You can run in Bombas, lounge in Bombas, dress them up, dress them down, but always give back in Bombas. because with every item purchased, another is donated. Bombas, comfort worth calling for. Go to bombas.com slash audio and use code audio for 20 % off your first purchase.

25:58That's B-O-M-B-A-S dot com and use code audio.

26:07I am. My God. I am. I'm thinking about going about blonde. Where has this come from? Not fully blonde. And I'll tell you why. Why? We kind of know this. not only did you phone Pippa, but I believe you and Pippa, when you were on your run the other day, she looked at your phone and had a look through some of your saved TikToks, a lot of which were sort of spring-summer style and different ways of styling mullets. And I think you'd looked at some blonde mullets and some different things for some inspo. So is that where the kind of idea came from? Yeah, but to be honest with you, mate, I just feel like it's time.

26:45Summer's coming and I'm going to just put a few highlights in there, I think. We're going back. And also I said... But now you've got... Because last time you didn't have the mullet. So are you presumably going to highlight from front to back? I think maybe, yeah. Just so there can be highlights at the bottom as well? Yeah. So it's just the whole middle section? I think so. Wow, okay. Yeah, I know. Bit nervous for it. I mean, I'm excited. We're all excited. Josh, tell me how you feel. I'm ecstatic, actually. I can't wait to see it. Kipper, do you think this going back blonde is a good move for Sam?

27:12Fucking hell. Yeah, I feel like recently loads of people have been saying it kind of out of nowhere, so I fear it's got to. It's just planted the seed, isn't it? Yeah, and it's grown rapidly. Shit, but the problem is, man, I'm going bald. No. I've seen it. I've seen it. I actually sent Pippa a message being like, Pippa, it's actually got really bad recently. It was on Bake Off. Mate, there's a clip, and it is so bad. It's so bad. I literally bend down. They go, don't open your oven. And I stupidly go, don't open my oven. And I looked at that clip and I went, I actually look like Fryer Tuck. No, genuinely Fryer Tuck.

27:45So you think a blonde Fryer Tuck would be better? No, I just don't. My worry is that I don't think I can blink because it makes the hair even worse. Yeah, but I think at this point, because you've already decided you're going to get a hair transplant. So, you know, I think maybe one last summer blonde. One last summer blonde! I'll be honest with you, I think the blonde is better for you. But I'm going to keep the brown, but highlight it. I think we've lost the plot here. Oh. What do you mean all? No. I think you've got to pick one. I think... No, I'm highlighting frosted tips. No, I think what we're doing then is you've already got three haircuts on one head.

28:19Now we're having three colours on one head. I think we just go natural and then highlight much how you used to do. Shit. I think you should do it. I'm actually here for it. I think that would look great. I think it's going to happen. I think we're going to do it. I think it is going to happen. So are we talking for the second year in a row? It's going to be a Sam Thompson summer glow up. I don't know. It might be a glow down. Two years in a row, we are having a Sam Thompson. It's a double glow up, guys. It's a double glow up. Oh, God. And you mentioned it there. You've got Bake Off coming up. Oh, mate, Bake Off's come out.

28:55It's out now. If you haven't seen it, go and watch it. I come last. Now we can talk about it. I'm going to be honest with you. Am I shocked? No. I was actually really proud of my meals as well. I made one fucking great meal. It was like a sponge. And the sponge was all right. But the custard I made was brilliant. Did you do a creme anglaise or a custard? A thick custard? Custard. I did a custard is what I did. And made it from scratch? Yeah, made it from scratch. And what happened? Did it split? No, the custard was amazing. I had a shell in my sponge. And Paul Holly was like, oh, there's a shell.

29:34I was like, mate, just take the shell out. Like the thing tastes great. Yeah, mate. Stop judging me. Yeah, but everyone else's, their custard was just like, was cement. Mine was the best custard. And he basically marked me last, even though I had the best custard. And that's when I had a bit of, I was like, Paul, come on, mate. This is actually, like, I've really worked really hard for this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And how did that go down with him? Well, he was just like, In this charity baker.

29:58I gotta say, I did actually, because you do, you put so much into it. And then when someone goes... Well, yeah, too much, a shell. When someone goes, it's not that good. You're like, oh, that's actually really hurt my feelings. Yeah. But it was a great show. I mean, mate, you'd love it. It's exactly what you would want it to be. It's a bit of a cult thing, Bake Off, isn't it? Everyone loves it. So if you do love Bake Off and you love Sam Thompson, go and watch him on the Bake Off. Molly May's just done it. But despite that, go and watch it and see Sam on the Bake Off. Yeah. It was a real, real good bit of fun.

30:30But look, it's not all about me. You know, Pete has had one heck of a week. Not actually so much. Pete as much as your dog Rodney is now an influencer Rodney actually yes Rodney is an influencer Rodney and I had a big job yesterday it was he's I put him to work um it's about time because if you've seen the signs of him he's eating me out of house and home um but yes he went to work he worked with a very famous dog who was it can we know no no okay fine um uh but yeah for a little campaign and it's the first one that Rodney has actually been requested for so it was very nice to take him to work if you know me I have previously done you know Eric has retired now he was the face of Butchers he's been on calendars he was on the front cover of my book and he's done a number of different front covers but time hasn't been kind to him and he's now ugly as fuck so he's been put out to pasture he's been put out to pasture he's enjoying his retirement he's good he's happy Rodney's taken the mantle and I will say he was fucking superbly was he he was a one take wonder on every level do you ever get nervous when you're doing those kind of animal things You're literally like, I don't want my dog to show me up as an owner.

31:38It is quite nerve wracking because what happens is when you film these sort of things is not only do I have to do my job, but then you have to worry about having the dog there. And the problem is, is sometimes people aren't dog people. So they expect the dog to just sort of like just do what they say straight away. To make them lie down. Yeah. So if you could come in, sit down, look up at you, then bark at the camera, give it a wink, look back at you, then do a little dance and then go, you're like, what the fuck? Bear in mind that obviously Rodney is not an acting dog. He's just been trained by me.

32:16But let me tell you, it was a proud dad moment. Was it? Honestly, it was a very proud dad moment. He was exceptionally well behaved, did everything in the first take. He was a fucking angel. And question, did he get paid? No. Are you going to put him out to work? No. No, do you know what it was? It was a campaign that I had, and it's to do with me loving animals. So I was like, why don't Rodney come along? I'm not actually putting him to work. Well, I put the cats to work when I can. Yeah, before someone comes in on me and starts going, wow, you've been putting on fucking dogs. Because technically, he's six months old, it's child labour.

32:57But no, no, no, he basically came to work, And he was included in a campaign thing. But there was a very famous, very famous dog there. Wow. And Rodney was as well behaved as the trained dog. Very nice. That's all I'm saying. Are you going to be taking on a walk down your new trail very soon, I think, aren't you? It's a very dog heavy week this week because tomorrow at time of recording this, I have had an incredible honour bestowed upon me, Sam. Yep. Essex County Council have officially named, and I will be opening. Is there going to be a ribbon cutting? The Pete Wicks dog walking trail. Yes.

33:35I will be down there doing press and photos tomorrow. But it is a specific dog walk that you can take your dogs on. It's all about, you know, getting out there, having a nice place for your dogs, going on this, you know, magical little walk in Will County Park, I believe. Good for your mental health, all that sort of stuff. So I'll be going to do that. But it is the official, if you're looking like, you know, explore Essex and all that, you can actually, if you are a tourist coming to Essex, you can go on the Pete Wicks dog walking trail. Imagine all those tourists turning up. It's like, guys, this is Buckingham Palace.

34:07This is where you can get your Union Jack umbrella. Bring it over off to Essex to see the Pete Wicks dog walking. It got me thinking, what if, because, you know, listen, we love the dogs in the office. You know, lots of us have got access to dogs. What if we did the staying relevant and we all went - Dog trail. We did the Pete Wicks dog trail one day. I'll bring the cats. It's the Pete Wicks dog trail. Yeah, bring me any animals. No, no, no. So you can't walk it with any other animal. Oh, really? Well, there's obviously rules. Oh, there's rules. Shit. Oh, fair enough. Okay, fine. So it literally has to be a dog.

34:38Shit, it's like a park ranger who comes over to you and be like, I'm really sorry, mate. You can't do that. Yeah, well, they've employed someone, which is to just keep the trail going. That's wild. So if I turn up with a cat, they'd be like, sorry, mate, not for you. Yeah, because it's a dog trail. Wow. Because obviously, you know, it's risky then. There's dangers involved in the dog trail. So you have to sign waivers and all that sort of stuff. Shit. No, Sam, come on. Oh, my God, you bastard. I honestly... A gamekeeper for a fucking... Mate. A walk around a fucking field. Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ.

35:06Sorry, the Pete Licks dog trail security here. I genuinely thought you said that was such a straight face. I was like, yeah, 100%. That sounds legit. Do you know what? I will say this. Pete does very dog heavy things as we all know he loves dogs that's not a surprise to anyone but what you don't see is beyond the TV beyond the Instagram photos of him, Rodney and Eric Pete does adore an animal just a few days ago Pete and Pippa saved a stray dog this is a legitimate story there was a dog outside of this studio and he was stray and Pete and Pippa took him to Battersea Dogs and Cats Home to try and find if there was an owner.

35:53I believe the microchip had run out, so they stayed with the dog the entire half day to make sure that dog was safe. So it's... Okay, I'm the only one clapping. Fuck me. Right, okay. I can't clap myself, can I? Yeah, Josh. Josh and Kira, come on. So, yeah, I mean, look, so effectively, I mean, this sounds made up based on the fact that I have a dog rescue show. You could not write this. You literally couldn't write it, could you? We were in a meeting, Josh, Kira, Pippa and I the other day, and it was, what, half three? About half three. So we were in a meeting in the office, and then one of the girls from reception in the building came in and was like, Pete, obviously they know my dog's coming here quite a bit.

36:36Pete, have you got a lead? We've got a stray dog outside who's really scared and, you know, we can't catch him. So I got up, I took one of Rodney's, They went outside and there was a number of people around this petrified dog. Like, I mean, he was shaking, like, petrified. Couldn't get near him. He was all over. So I spent about 45 minutes outside with this dog, trying to coax him and eventually managed to get a little slip lead on him. And bless him. I mean, he was a lovely dog. And when he stank and he was underweight, I feel like he was potentially someone's dog. Because by the time we got there, I mean, he was petrified.

37:10And it took such a long time to even get close to him. But he was quite... friendly i'll be honest with you like by the time he you know i'd spend a little bit time with him he's quite friendly um so then i called pippa to bring in my phone because if you find a stray dog it's really difficult if you find a stray dog knowing what to do with it is the hardest thing yeah because then you're kind of stuck now ordinarily what you can do is you can call the council wherever you find him and then it's passed on to a dog warden they'll come pick up but that's not always the case and that's not always the best thing to do either but dogs are supposed to be microchipped in the UK.

37:46So Pippa came. You want to take over here, darling? I came and Pete was sat on the floor outside in reception with the dog. And like by this point, the dog's like nestled up into Pete and they're like best pals. And then Pete kind of had to pick up this dog and take it outside to his car. But like quite full on for a stray dog. Like you just didn't know how it was going to react to Pete. It was like, it'll be fine. And just kind of scooped up and it was fine. We went outside, put him in the car. Very gently, very slowly, very patiently took a while and then went to the vets yeah so we took him to the vets because uh dogs are supposed to be microchips if you're talking to any vet they can microchip uh because if he was lost then that would the microchip if it's registered will tell you address who his phone number all that sort of stuff now we did have a microchip so we thought happy days but unfortunately it wasn't they hadn't registered the microchip um and actually the numbers were coming up in a different country so don't know this dog's backstory now i i personally think and i've obviously been around dogs and dogs like this for quite a while i think he potentially had a home but had been lost for quite a while because he did stink didn't he darling yeah and he was underweight i mean he couldn't wait to get some food down and we're in the vets now at this point we're knocking on it's now got to nearly five o 'clock so i've called uh lisa at dogs trust who's been in here and said, Lisa, what are the next steps?

39:08Because the vets can't keep him because it's a small high street vet. Dog warden not answering the phone. No one's answering the phone. And I'm not a big fan. I don't know if people know this, but this is – I'm going to say it anyway. And, in fact, you can keep this in. The problem is if you find a stray dog and you call council and it goes to a dog warden, dog warden picks it up, there is a seven-day rule in the UK, which means that if the dog has not been claimed after seven days and it is with a council, they can euthanise the dog. Didn't want that to happen. Called Dogs Trust. Dogs Trust, I mean, you know, where our office is, which is in South London.

39:42Called Dogs Trust at Basildon. The nearest one to Dogs Trust is Harefield, which is North London. Spoke to Lisa and Lisa was like, have you tried Battersea? Because it's very, very close. And despite the fact, obviously, different charities, I'm a patron thing, but Battersea, they do amazing stuff as well. Everyone just wants to kind of rescue and look after dogs. That's the main part of this. I then called Nicole who works on my dog show because she used to work on Paul O 'Grady's dog show at Battersea. She spoke to someone at Battersea. They reopened Battersea because it had closed. Wow. And a couple of ladies and we took, at this point, Pippa and I had named him because he was a lovely tiger brindle connor.

40:19So Pippa, you named him? Tony. Tony the Tiger. Tony the Tiger. So we took him to Battersea and dropped him off at Battersea there with some wonderful people there who I believe are assessing him currently still got seven days for anyone to claim and they'll try and see if they can find previous owners if there was a previous owner um in which case they are going to be keeping him and trying to re-home him so if you do see tony i don't know if they kept the name but i'm going to be getting an update at the end of this week uh on the website it was the dog that that pippa and i actually rescued wow but i do sometimes think everything happens for a reason of all the places and of all the offices how weird yeah that it ends up being our one on a day when i was here yeah that's crazy isn't it that's so that's that's the universe there because i genuinely learned loads because what i would have no idea about what a dog warden was or like what you do and like pete said that's probably not actually sometimes the best thing but because of like the contacts you had and the way in which you were able like pete was like not gonna leave at one point he was like i'll just have to take it home if i can't find somewhere for it like with ruddy with Eric.

41:25I was like, I don't know how this is going to go. But like, I just don't know what would have happened though if you hadn't. It's mad. It's really difficult because a lot of people do that because you don't always know what the best thing to fucking do is. And this poor thing, if it had looked like, because he had no collar on and nothing else and we've got to park very near here. Now it could be, when people dogs on harnesses, it's very easy for a dog to slip a harness. It's quite hard to slip a collar. So maybe it's it, but because he was so underweight and he stank. He just stank like piss.

41:57That dog's been on the streets for a little while. So I don't know. Hopefully, if he did have a home and he was lost a little while ago and has been kind of on the streets for a bit, hopefully someone finds him like a tiger bender, kind of staffy type dog. If not, then that's, you're going to rehome him and hopefully you'll find somewhere very happy and safe. Potentially, you never know with someone that I know. Well, there you go. if somebody claims him, get in touch with the pod because that would be such a cool full circle moment and bring him back in and just don't lose him again. Do you know what's mad?

42:34It's obviously like I start, I don't know if I can say this. Fuck it, I can. I start filming again for series four in two weeks time. Yeah. And Battersea aren't currently currently filming with Alison Hammond for The Love of Dogs. so when I turned I mean imagine there was no cameras it was literally like what I do for the fucking show but there were no fucking cameras I mean Pippa took some lovely footage of us driving around on her phone but then when I got to Battersea I literally said to him he's coming traitors like because obviously they're the enemy in the TV world but it just goes to show how amazing charities are because everyone actually does what's best for the dogs so shout out to Battersea shout out to Lisa at Dogs Trust and all the people for making that happen so that hopefully Tony is very safe now and finds a home.

43:18Go on, Tony. Yeah, what a mad, what a mad little, little kind of weird dog day for us in the office. Fucking, I'll tell you what, that is, God, it's just, I'm an emotional wreck. I'm an emotional wreck and I just, oh my God. And I don't know how this is going to send you, mate, because this might just send you over the edge in terms of emotion. Molly Mays released two trainers with Adidas. They have a double lace on these ones. I mean obviously That has got me

43:52It's got a double lace What like Are you lace at the bottom And at the top It's got a double lace And I just wanted to know Like you know How do you feel about Double lace Two nowadays And what Molly's doing In the fashion world With her sneakers I mean I love I love a lace So surely two's better When I look at a trainer So I've seen it So it's the You basically lace up to halfway and then you know tie the knot and then put in a separate lace that then laces up there lace there lace there so it kind of looks a little bit like a bow and I believe the trainers I mean firstly let's actually give us some props on this yeah girl from Love Island has done a collaboration with Adidas fair fucking fair fucks do you know what I mean like in all seriousness fair fucks and I can is it released yet I can almost guarantee you that's going to sell out.

44:47Oh, 100%. Now, what she's done is she has redesigned two Adidas. Obviously, I like fashion. So she's redesigned two Adidas classics, the Superstar and the Samba in colorways, which match something that I think is very much her aesthetic and the people that follow her. I think she's gone for a matcha-colored Samba and a caramel latte superstar. I'm impressed with that. Question, Pippa. Do you know what it is? I like fashion, don't I? But yeah. As a Molly May superfan, Pippa, are you going to be copying a pair? And will you double lace them? The double lace thing is sort of just adding an element.

45:30She hasn't designed a shoe. The shoes are already existing. She's picked a colour for them and put two laces on it. Now, don't get me wrong. No, it's fucking incredible. But it's a specific. You're allowed to say how amazing she's done from Love Island within the same breath of being like, it's not exactly like it's fucking... I mean, she hasn't reinvented the wheel. Yeah. But, as you said, she's nailed it. And you cannot hate against that. And what I will say, what I am going to say, I quite like the colour of the sandbar. Whoa! Peacock is going to be buying a pair of Molly May double lace sandbars.

46:07What I will say, though, double lace is fucking stupid. Don't ruin it for yourself. If a bloke does it, but also not the first to double lace, because there are other fashion designers who have recently done. Should we all cop a pair then? No. I don't think we'd get a chance because they'll sell out. I can guarantee they'll sell out. That's why I don't think I would buy them. The amount of people that are going to be wearing double-laced matcha sambas for a this and yap is incredible. Off the charts. Do you know what I mean? Imagine a nice sort of like dusty green aloe set with a matcha double-laced samba or if you decide you're just going a little bit chill and you want to go down the full Adidas vibe.

46:49You know, a brown firebird track pant with a caramel latte superstar. I mean, if you're doing that, guys, you are aesthetically an Instagram's, you know, you're a queen. Pippa, what kind of person does buy a Molly May shoe? Someone like myself, absolutely. Oh, she would be gagging for a hair. Someone like myself. They are actually quite nice. Then I don't dislike them. No, no, no. Take away the shoe, I'm talking about like the Molly May part. No, but I think I love Molly May. I love Molly May. LDA one. I love Molly May. She lives with mum. Birthday's coming up. Well, do you know what? That's actually, I think, the nicest I've ever heard Pete be about a Molly May bit of clothing.

47:31Well, do you know why? Because actually, have you seen them? They are actually quite nice, the colours she's peaked. I already like, listen, Adidas actually make great fucking shoes anyway. So the shoes are just fucking great. But it's quite a nice colour, eh? I'll tell you what's going to really piss you off. As everyone probably knows, we invested in a sports team, a high-flying sports team. Yeah, we went on BBC News. We went on BBC News. To discuss club owners. Just to set the scene on this, Sam organised this BBC News thing. And during the BBC News interview, Sam said, watch out Ryan Reynolds and Tom Brady, Birmingham City, I believe, for Tom Brady, and Wrexham with Ryan Reynolds and the other fellow no one knows.

48:17They've done amazing things. I mean, Wrexham have climbed, I think it's like four or five promotions in the past five years since they took over. Tom Brady's got a huge stake. And actually, Michael B. Jordan has got a stake in a football club as well. Lots of people are doing that. So we thought, let's jump on that trend. And yeah, we invested heavily into a football club. At the start of this season. So just as they were beginning a new season, they actually got a promotion. That wasn't down to us. Well, it wasn't even down to them. No, there was quite a few teams that dropped out of their league.

48:52So we started well. We are sort of coming towards the end of season one. Yeah. So we've even got a photo of them behind. Sam, do you want to hold the picture whilst we do? No, I think, do you know what? I don't even want to hold it. No. Well, let's give you an update on how they're getting on. Sam? GBU, I go to Great Bar United. have folded as a team. After nine years together, GPU is no more. On our first year of sponsoring, those fuckers have been together for nine years. The moment we get involved, they're fucking folded. What is the opposite to a Midas touch? Because that is effectively what we've got.

49:33We are so shit. I mean, I'll tell you what, lads. Don't worry. We'll invest. Fast forward six months. I can't fuck this. We are done. After nine years, they survived. How has that happened? As a grassroots football team, the passion, the family environment, you know, friends playing football together. Sam and I are fucking getting involved, all right? I put them in a fucking bright pink kit and the cunts go, fuck this, not anymore. They've bounced after nine years. And it's such a shame because results were on the up. No, they weren't. Oh, no, you're right, they weren't. They've lost every game.

50:10They have asked if you guys are interested. They're putting a new team together. Oh, no, they're not. You're joking. You're lying. I'm absolutely not. What have they asked if we're interested in? For the upcoming season, we're putting a new team together under a different name, AFC Old Boys. Then they've actually put brackets, Pete can relate. And then they've asked if we would like to be the sponsor for the next season. Well, firstly, not the best pitch, I've heard. secondly now this says to me if we're going to dive into this a little bit further you know the reason for a team folding the fact there are still people that senses tension I was going to say I believe there may be mutiny in the camp so actually you know there may be some disagreements which means that there is a core of GBU who I believe we are now calling the old boys who are looking to start again and you've left the other boys behind and this is what happens when you lose all the time shit gets real you know there's never normally tensions in a winning team but when you are fucking shit and losing every week and you can't find a route out of the gutter of football then I imagine you know tensions you know rise we don't know if there was infighting we don't know what the situation is but AFC old boys good luck with the new season we will not be a part of it no we won't be a part of it we're really disappointed in what's happened here as owners we can only blame ourselves.

51:35Yeah, that was a four-figure sum that you have just washed down the swanmy. Pissed up the shitter. BBC have also been back in touch asking you two for comment. You're fucking joking. I declined. You're joking, you're joking. No, it's going to say you two have declined to comment. Sorry, what? Is that true? Has BBC come back in? Yeah. BBC West Midlands, yeah. For what? They just asked for a comment. Why is your team folded that you've invested in? They just asked for a comment. Oh, we're so doing it. Get us on that interview now. No, I don't think that's a good idea. I think we need to get on the BBC interview now.

52:09Excellent. We'll make that happen. But in other news, this does mean that staying relevant are available for potential sports. We are indeed. Anything up to 15 grand. No, Sam. So what we are going to learn from last time is we're going to research the team and we are going to look at form and previous performance. because what I don't want to do is waste money on thunder c**t. No, exactly. I don't want to waste money on people who haven't got the passion, the effort, the motivation to win a game. But when we do find that team, we're going to invest heavily. And it doesn't have to be football. You know, if you are part of a paddle club, Sam would love to be part of that.

52:53Hockey. Netball. Basketball. Swimming club. Badminton. Badminton club. there are lots of different clubs that we are potentially looking at being involved in because you know it was a learning curve for us it was as sports club owners and we are looking to learn from our mistakes and I think the mistake that we made fundamentally is that we sponsored a shit team we did so we are looking for winners just putting it out send us your CVs this has died and so has my

53:28so has Pete Zest for life. So is my motivation and zest for life today. That is all we've got for Stay Relevant the podcast. The iPads died, as is Pete's motivation. As is GBU. As is GBU. But we will be back. And as Pete said at the start of this, we have a really special two guests for our bonus episode. So definitely wait out for that. Thank you so much for listening. We love you so much. I'm going to give you a clue. I'm going to do a Sam think dump and laughs.

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55:10Hello, Relevanters. We wanted to let you know that you can hear exclusive bonus episodes of Staying Relevant every month on Amazon Music. We are going to be playing Snog, Marry, Avoid, one of our favorite games, all with fictional characters. so prepare yourself for Sam to snog Woody from Toy Story and for me to marry Pocahontas. And possibly the genie from Aladdin. We don't know yet. We were sort of like undecided on that one. That's an avoid for me, that one genie. I don't know. I quite like it. Listen to monthly bonus episodes exclusively on Amazon Music and enjoy ad-free listening on Amazon Music for all episodes of Staying Relevant with your Prime membership.