176: Sam gets Roasted by his Sister - Louise Thompson!

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2:41are you an Anne with an E on the end? yes oh gosh oh you're not oh you said that with so much hope I that it couldn't have been a better start to a podcast than that Anne chat we we in this podcast believe that Anne as a middle name could be slightly Karen-y you've already had this conversation yeah so like we call Pippa Pippa Anne oh nice because people do it's like a Louise Anne yeah Louise Anne Lou Anne Lou Anne Lou Anne yeah Louis, you are a bit of a Karen and we're going to get onto that a little bit later. It's true. I feel, I actually agree with you. I hate my middle name. Sorry, any ants out there.

3:17I always, I used to lie when I was younger and I'd pretend it was Anna. No way. I'd be like, Louisiana. No, you did not. I did not know that. Yeah. What's yours, Robert? You're also still called Mum, Mummy, but we're going to talk about that later a little bit as well. I know. And Daddy. Do you still call Dad, Daddy? Is that really, really weird? You are 36. What am I going to call him, Dad? That just doesn't sound right. It's so American. I remember the moment I called daddy. I remember it as well. And it was actually quite weird for me, being your elder sibling, and then you just making that shift.

3:47And I was like, he thinks he's too cool. Had to. To call him daddy. But remember, as well as listening, you can watch us now too. The full video of this will be released on YouTube every Friday, after the audio is out, of course, every Monday. Now, before we get started, please make sure to hit follow wherever you're listening. That'll mean you'll be the first to know of each episode. No, we're not going to do the little chant because Pete's not here. So we all get a break. But wait, what is the chant? Monday, Wednesday, Friday, whatever. Pete goes, Wednesday out. We will have to go Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Sunday.

4:18And we've all got to pretend. Do you do that every intro? Every single intro. At the beginning, not at the end. At the beginning. And we all have to sit there and pretend like we enjoy it. And we sit there, all of us going, I hate this. I look at people every time. It's amazing you have so many listeners. I know they love it the listeners now love it if we don't do it they'll be like where was your Monday Wednesday Thursday Sunday oh fair play you are sitting in peach chair you coined it by the way I've heard you cry today in your record again why have you snuck in I've got my powder by the way not a shock why have you when did you hear me crying I didn't I literally went did she cry today and Kalina came and went yeah she did actually I was like oh I'm a shock it's called being passionate Sam it is it's called having feelings have you ever cried on this pod i've teared up a couple of times i teared up with when pete whenever pete's like exceptionally nice to me i always get a little bit emotional like whenever he like says something like super nice like what kind of thing and you can see he actually means it so like for example when i did the run the charity run just before i went on it like i sort of like opened up and was like you know what i'm like really really nervous and like i've never done this before i just want to do myself proud i never really been proud of myself before in that kind of manner and he just like went into this triad of just beautiful speech and i was like oh my god i'm gonna cry on a fucking comedy podcast um i actually don't think i've ever seen you cry yeah you have oh that's a lie yes you have oh you're not a regular cry though it wasn't all that long yeah no but when i do i go it's only really to do with exes i think it's a relationship cry no animal cry as well are you what kind of animal stuff i cry a lot of movies at the moment as well i cried um i cried at a Project Hail Mary recently as well.

6:03I don't know if anyone's watched that. I don't know what that is. Yeah, there was like an alien who went through a tough time. When we were growing up though, Sam, like an alien? You cried over an alien? What the hell? There was an alien who was really going through it. But look, we're now turning this into He Said, She Said. What it is about is a format where I can get some answers from you. Stunning. First answer being, why did you ghost me over the weekend? I just put an Instagram story out to the people. Yeah, I know. I got lots of DMs. I know that was over the weekend but also the beginning of this week your followers are so committed like I genuinely had people being like you really need to respond to Sam like I'm really worried about him I think he'll be okay how do you know I was okay because you were standing on my roof in a fucking Instagram story I could see it and you tagged me you it's not like intentional ghosting I've just got a life oh please I could go out and do stuff on the weekend No, we've got spotlights and cameras on us now.

7:02Let's be completely honest here, right? You look at my phone call. When I call you up, you look at your phone and you put it back face down. I know you do. Okay, can I just say, because first of all, I don't really like taking phone calls. I'm more of a voice note or a WhatsApp person. If someone calls, I'm worried that like that opens up an hour long window where I have to communicate with someone and I like to shut that stuff down. So if, so yeah, I'm quite selective. Calls have to be like first thing in the morning or later, later at night. Occasionally, they're like, I'll try and freak you out.

7:31I will pick it up. And you'll be like, what the hell? Yeah. And I always am. You actually called me quite a few times when I was in Devon over Easter. And I worried then that something was wrong. Like I sent you a message. I was like, is everything okay? You called like four times in a minute. That is needy. No, it's just a brother wanting to speak to his sister and best friend. But like four times. And then you called Ryan like the same amount of times. You're going to turn into dad. Like always just calling Ryan first because he tends to be a little bit wrong. Ryan does pick up more than you.

8:00I've noticed that. I've noticed that. But okay, does that mean that you're like, how do you feel about the fact that we live next to each other and we do constantly hang out? You know, is this too much? Is this like, do I need to back off a little bit? Because I will. I'll leave you forever. But you say that, but we've had this conversation before and you never left. So I think that you're around and, you know, I think it's kind of cute. I think like the standing on the roof thing is maybe You love No I really don't like that Because it's really fucking scary When like suddenly a figure disappears in the roof light It's like actually quite scary sometimes Like also the girls find it like a little bit much So I have these two girls Holly and Louisa Don't say like that No they do Like Holly and Louisa work often with me at home And you'll like frighten them And like also some of your behaviour is just not really that okay Like you come round You've maybe met them like 10 times And you'll like literally fart and waft it on them and then you'll like go and like give people like handsy massages.

8:59You'll like come up behind people and be like, how are you doing? And then you just linger. But like, it's weird because you're so busy and you've got so much work to do, but you have these pockets of time where you'll pop round to the house and you'll just be like, so? And I'm like, can you not distract the team? I'm not scary when I turn up into the skylight though. I'm just sort of like, hey. But you are because you actually do, purposely you'll be like creepy about it. You could just, I don't know, you could, it's just like you're quite you always just need something like that could be like a like a nice offering do you know i mean it could be like write a little note like oh hey like can i pop round so it's like like no hi like oh and then you yeah i do get these half days sometimes where like i don't know what to do with myself because you said i do quite a bit and then like when i get those half days i do i don't have anything to do and i'm like i don't know i just so i just knock on your door.

9:51But I think because we've already established, obviously, that you have ADHD and you don't like exploring that much outside of your comfort zone. Like, it's sort of okay. Like, for you, it's comfortable just going next door. Yeah, just hanging out. So that's about as far as you'll go in your free time. What would happen if we were to move house? Yep. Because I've actually been thinking about it this recently. Why? Were you thinking about going? People keep... Are you actually thinking about going? You wouldn't do that. You wouldn't dare. But this is the problem. I'm stuck because I can't actually do that to him because I don't know what would happen.

10:25Yeah, too right. I'd be so lonely. I couldn't do it. If someone moved next door into your gaff, I'd egg the egg place. I'd be like, you know, and they're like, you're not my real mum. I'd be like, you're not my real neighbours. And honestly, I'd make their life a living hell. Okay, so what happens when we get to a place though? We're not going to get to that place. Yeah, but Sam, okay, so what if we were like, oh, we suddenly come into some cash and we want to go a little bit more market. Well, great, keep the place you've already got and then go somewhere in the countryside. There you go. Bish, bash, bosh.

10:52That should be really serious. Yeah. Yeah. You wouldn't go. But what about, can we like get maybe like houses somewhere else next, next door to each other? What, are you inviting me in? Yeah. I mean, to be fair, like it would be weird not to have you next door. It'd be weird having regular neighbours. Because I actually know the neighbours on both sides. Yeah. You'd miss it. You would miss it. So what's the plan then? Stay where we are forever. So when you, okay. real talk things don't need to change do you ever future plan yeah so like think about where you want to be in five years time yes I'm going to be married with Tally I'm going to have a kid are you wait are you no I'm just hopefully I'm going to be married in five years do you think you'll get married to Tally would you like to get married to Tally what does that look like is she actually the one yeah oh that's cute yeah and would you to be fair your kids would be very hot like lucky yeah it wouldn't take my genes you've done quite well there no I do I wouldn't be with I absolutely wouldn't be with Talia if I didn't think she was the one.

11:52I'm 33. I can't go, I couldn't go into anything now and be like, this is just a little bit of fun. I'd have to literally, she's my girlfriend. The moment I made her my girlfriend was the moment I was like, yeah, this is like, I see a future in this. So yeah, she's in my future. She is my future. People ask me about her all the time. Really? Yeah. And I'm like, I actually, I need to spend more time with her, which we're doing this weekend. Okay, wait, so, sorry, five-year plan. So, married, so you're not going to be, like, dad who didn't... Basically, I just want to know when Leo's getting a cousin.

12:27Are you going to have kids? How many years do you want to have kids? Well, look, it's all down to the girl who is carrying the child. So, and when she feels right and all that kind of stuff. If I just click my fingers and it was, like, the perfect... And it was my ideal scenario. Yeah, yeah. I would say time goes so fast I'm not ready for a kid quite yet I would say 36 okay so three years we could be having our third by that point third? you're having a third? have we not spoken, we speak a bit about the journey the fertility journey that we are on yeah I'm going to ask you about that because I feel like I don't know enough about that so marriage, maybe kids in three years time maybe, maybe But say like you literally, say you were to win the lottery and you suddenly get your mitts on five milli pounds.

13:19Okay. What are you doing house-wise? I know exactly what I'm doing. Yeah, tell me. Keeping the London gap. Yeah. And getting a country place. So then we are literally going to stay in those houses for eternity. Of course we are. It's on a main road. Who cares? But what about kids? Has Leo run into traffic recently? I haven't seen him run in there. But what if you wanted to move into a 10-bedroom house in London? How well off are you? Fuck, someone's doing all right. Bloody hell. I know, now it sounds like hypothetically I'm saying what my wife is doing. Yeah, but look, there's no point. So are we shaking on this?

13:57Yeah, let's do it right now, on air. Ready? One, two, three. Ryan doesn't get a say. One, two, three. Shake with it. We're going to stay together forever. In the same house? In the same house. In the same street? Yes. We'll make a blood pact. Oh, fuck it. Yes! Everyone saw it? Well, actually, do you know what? Talking, let's just roll it back ever so slightly. Talking about sort of like marriage and kids and all that kind of stuff. I've always wondered, like, you've said to me a few times, you're like, you can't imagine me on a date. And like me, like texting somebody. I saw you on a date. Did you?

14:29Oh, yeah. In the pub. It was so awkward. Why? You guys were sat so far apart on the chairs. But you weren't opposite each other. So it was like a round table and you were sat next to each other but really far apart and she was literally two foot taller than you and there was a conversation was not flowing um i thought it was do you know who i'm talking about i know exactly yeah we went for dinner me sam and pete the other day said girl was in the restaurant on the table next to us but me and pete arrived first and she was on the table next to us but um like sam hadn't arrived yet so i texted sam like heads up and then he came in knowing what was going on but he was like oh no he came in i've never seen him walk so fast past the table he was like hey guys how are you hey oh but like me and beat was was sat there and there wasn't a third chest he was like okay i'm gonna go wait in the bar bye and then just like scuttled off no it was it was death wait did you Did you say hi to her?

15:29No, no, no, no, no. Only because I just, I don't think like, what would I say? Did it end badly? No, no, no, not at all. It never got to a place, it never got to a place that it could have ended badly. It was just a few days and there wasn't a chair for me. So I came in, there was just a two, there was just, we were meant to be having dinner for three and they were sat on a two-man seat. Why? I don't know. It was a holding table. Ours wasn't ready yet. They were in a holding table. So I steam in, right? And they're on the table. and you know so we're to Pataga so like the outside's like very narrow and so like their table's there their table's there I'm stood in the middle of both tables and I've literally got my hands on my hips with no chair and you know when like you've realized there's no chair everyone in the vicinity has realized there's no chair and so everyone's looking at what your next move is and I just put my hand on my hips I went well it looks like there's no chairs here I went I'll wait inside by the bar and then just turned round and did a ui and turned back out wait did you actually sit by the bar yeah because that's such a grown up thing to do before I'm here I'll go and wait by the bar and then as you know it got even worse because then there wasn't a seat by the bar so I ended up just standing in the middle of the restaurant and then we scuttled out after him because we felt bad for him so then we all just stood awkwardly standing at a bar when you're like sub six foot is quite an awkward situation anyway I feel like you've got to be like a tall bloke to stand at a bar and make it look good what are you trying to say Well, look, I'm speaking for myself as well.

16:55Do you know what I mean, though? Being at a bar, you just feel like a bit of a child. I just have memories of us standing as kids next to Dad. It was even worse than that. There wasn't a seat. So me, Pippa, and Pete stood in the middle of the restaurant and then one of the matrodites came over and went, Scooby, can you wait outside? That's so awkward. So we shuffled outside. Had he been before? Yeah, it's lovely. Has Pete been? No, Pete never comes south-west. this is reminding me of didn't you date someone once who like second date or third date said to you yeah like lots of my friends have told me that I just shouldn't be dating you and I was like that's such weird chat that was also a date I had last year was that with the same girl?

17:35no different girl and like she was friends with quite a few like pseudo famous people and was like yeah they all think that I shouldn't be with you I quote actually the person in question who was talking to her said why would you want to be with him when you can be with someone who owns a yacht? Oh my God, yes. It was whilst I was in the cab with her and you know when you're like, you're locked in, you can't go anywhere. And I knew at that moment, I went, we're not going to end up together. You should be dating someone with a yacht. She literally, do you know what she did? She told me to answer me and she went, you are so lucky.

18:09I'm being deadly serious. I'm sat in the back of the cab with this girl. Pippa knows who she is. Pippa wasn't too sure. Wasn't too sure. You weren't too sure about it? No, just say it. You weren't too sure about it? I was like, what are you doing? Oh, right. Okay, fine. Just on the tea thing. I don't know why. I've spent like a little bit more time on TikTok than I used to recently. And I mean, like, she's just so hot. Like, I feel like all of these videos that Tally puts up. Have you seen them? Just these little like dancey ones. I'm like, fucking hell. Like, did we ever used to be that hot and cool?

18:42Like, it's just so, I'm like mesmerized. honestly i feel you i feel louise i look at her sometimes and like and you know i almost feel i was gonna i was gonna do something that's probably like really you shouldn't do we could take this out if this isn't the right thing to say it's almost her fault that she's that fit like because like i look at tally and i'm like you have no right to be that nice when you're that beautiful can i just ask so with the regular messaging that comes our way being your neighbor's yeah sister brother-in-law are you the same when it comes to dating like do you i mean clearly from the the chat with the can can i kiss you it's not necessarily that smooth but do you do you like do you play a game or are you just like straight up this is me oh this is me yeah yeah yeah yeah there's no games it's the prawns are good like should we have some Padron Peppers oh wait at the Davos yeah no wait so how did you guys first engage because Zara was through DMs right yeah yeah she DMed me what and then how did you you and Tani met through Rez your friend yeah oh because she came to the Staying Relevant O2 gig and I remember seeing her there yeah Wait, was she on the tube with us all like when we went to that club downstairs?

20:11Yes. The old 151. Yes, she was. She was there. But weren't you maybe? Yes, there was someone else. You were getting with someone else. So how did that all happen? Was that not a bit of a weird game to play?

20:24It's so true. But that's true because I remember thinking, oh, this. Hold on. Wait, hang on. It was quite confusing because there are like quite a few of your mates and then quite a few girls. And I was like, this is giving 14-year-olds energy on the tube to go to a club. because I couldn't work out who was chirpsing with who. Chirpsing. She's cool. But she's cool. I think I knew it was that she was a keeper when you told me that you guys were playing chess at her. Yeah, that was like a few of our date nights. We'd just sit down and play chess together. And also that she's quite weird. She's really weird.

20:52You told me that she listened to a podcast that was titled, like, Why Am I So Awkward? Yeah, she used to listen to, like, I think it was Mel Robbins and something, like, How to Be Less Awkward in Social Situations. You know, we're going away on our first ever trip together this weekend. I get nervous. Are you? Only because of mum. Wait, why? Well, just because, I don't know, because we've never had a trip away together. In eight months we've been together. You and Ryan and mum, like you guys are back of the car, like you're strapping in Leo to the car seat, like you're in it together. We're not very sexy as three.

21:23Me, mum and Ryan. But you've been in the game for years together. Do you know what I mean? Like you're seasoned vets. Like if you were a football team, like Ryan would be like the 32-year-old centre-back, like Virgil van Dijk you'd be sort of like the you know the most Sally you've been you're 33 you sort of come to the end of your career like no not in a bad way but it's like our mum's like the manager like sort of Jurgen Klopp and like but like you've all been you've all been in the same team for a while like Tali's like a new she's like Esteval Willian like the new she's like the new Brazilian kid on the block and like introducing her to a team a changing room is quite intense wait so you think it's more intense for you guys For her, yeah.

22:05For her, nerves wise. Oh, I thought you were going to be embarrassed. She's really excited. She's really, really excited, yeah. You actually went to have lunch with her family. I did, yeah. A couple of days ago. Yeah, I did. With the grandparents? I got the feedback yesterday. Yeah, well, how did it go? Her mum really likes me. Well, that's good. And then as we were leaving, Tally turns around to her mum and mum goes, what are you doing later? And Tally goes, oh, we're going to play PlayStation together. And I went, oh, no. I've got a question for you then. As a girl, right, say, I mean, let's say we're not brother and sister.

22:34but someone is messaging you back in my way, right? Right. Let's say the date's just finished and you've got a message because this is what I do. The date's just finished. Louise, I'm immediately phoning them. Did you have a good time? Same either. Shall we do it again? When? Okay, so I've just gone home. Are you dropping someone home at their door? You're in the car. I've got you a car on and you're in the car on the way home. Are you quite generous like that? Yeah. Yeah, you're happy to spend a bit of cash. Yeah, I know. Look, I get we're in modern times and stuff but I still like to pay for most things just because I feel like it's my privilege to be there with you.

23:08It's a gentlemanly thing to do at the beginning. But I've called you. We've only just left five minutes ago. Your phone rings. It's the dude who's just taking you on a date. Are you picking up? I'm like, did I leave something behind? I'm like, save your therapy chat for Pippa.

23:27To be honest, I'd probably still have a lot of that post-date anxious energy, so I just wouldn't pick up. but that's my vibe I just wouldn't pick up but like also what could you possibly have to say like how did it go that's what you speak to your friends about not the girl yeah but then I'd be like so how's your journey back going well fucking boring probably they're just sat in a car what that's they're probably messaging their friends slacking you off so they're not going to tell you the truth if you if I got ghosted I would I would die inside have you ever been ghosted no you've actually never been ghosted no so it's always you've always had a a conversation about how the relationship's gonna end?

24:05Oh, no. I think there's been mutual ghosting. Okay, mutual ghosting. Like, I think we both kind of realised it wasn't really gonna happen so we both decided, whatever. So, okay, so hypothetically then, you're, so say I don't pick up the phone and then you send a message the next day. What do you do if I don't respond for like, around the 24 hours? Call Tipper immediately or Pete and be like, what the fuck just happened here? And then, and then be like, no, she's just not Angie, mate. And then be like, and then double down and try even harder. Yeah, does it make you want it more? Well, just why don't you like me?

24:37So just more erratic messaging? More erratic. Way more erratic. At what point do you stop the messaging? Do I stop? Yeah, yeah. No, probably after the first ghosting, I'd be like, okay, do you know what? Maybe one phone call. Maybe just a phone call just in case. You're not telling the truth. I am. What do you think? Okay, what do you think? I think if you got ghosted, you would, yeah, you'd call people being like, what's happening? and then you'd send another one. Like you'd go in with a complete new message. He wouldn't be like, hey, have you seen this? Or like send question marks or something.

25:08But you would definitely be like, oh my God, like guess what just happened to me? Like you'd go in with something completely new. Yeah. Then they'd go to that again. And then you'd try and call them. Yeah. And then I'd leave it. And then you'd probably leave it. Then I'd leave it. So are you quite hot on like the phone call thing? Oh, I love a phone call. Early in a relationship. Straight in. Really? Yeah. I call people before a date, before my first date with them. Do you? Yeah. That's so intense. No, it's great because it breaks the ice beforehand. You're addicted to phone calls. I do. Like, literally, every time I see you, you're walking around the block on a phone.

25:38I know. Like, with your headphones in. But. But what do you have to say to someone that you don't know? I'll tell you exactly what I have to say. I literally, I'm walking back and I go, let's say it's Tally, I'll be like, I'll be like, Talitha Blinska, how are we? She's like, I'm good, how are you? I'll be like, tell me everything about your day. I'm like, tell me everything, I want to know everything. She's like, what the hell? She's like, we're going on a date. and I'm like, yeah, I know, but what better icebreaker than just to sort of do a bit of this and just have a conversation? Because then I think it lets her know that I'm not just a random, you can have a conversation with me and I can hold a conversation with you and it's not awkward.

26:11So you know you're going to get there and at least it's not going to be awkward. Because she's told you about her day. Yeah, and I'm not going to be like, how was your day? But I'm going to be like... That's exactly what you just said. No, I'm going to maybe crack a gag. Because you were like, tell me everything about your day. At which point I'd be like, fucking hell, this guy's intense. Yeah, I think that does sometimes... I don't have that much time. I think that does sometimes come across, but I just want them to feel comfortable around me prior to us meeting up in person. Okay. Does it work for you?

26:35It does actually, weirdly. I think it catches a lot of people off guard at the start, though, to be fair, and then they ease into it, and they're like, actually, we can have a pretty good chat. And then when you do meet up afterwards, you're like, okay, now it's just so much more relaxed, I find. Yeah. But I'm off the market now, so, you know. Yes, until death do us part. Have you been ghosted before?

27:00Oh, look at her. I actually don't think I have. Wow. I've done, I do a lot of ghosting, which is not a good habit. Because actually we're both notoriously terrible with our phones. Yeah. And that must be like some sort of weird environmental thing. Or is it genetic? Like. Genetics. But you're very selective. So it's like, it tends to be like a one way street with you. It's like, I will call, you will call and message whoever you want. and then, you know, you, you are not necessarily good at responding to everybody else. I am just like pretty absent on the phone. So like I, I ghost friends, relationships.

27:35I've had like DMs from men before. Men? I've had DMs from men before? Look, I've actually had a few famous people slide into my DMs. Oh, go on. No, I can't. Dude, oh, shut up. No, because actually they're married. Who? Oh, oh, oh my God. pre-marriage pre-marriage clock it clock it and then like there'd be like a little bit of conversation it's giving marriage and then I'd be like I actually just can't and I just I kind of panic and I get paralyzed wait can we rewind quickly so you've actually been we won't go into who they are but you have actually been DM'd by married men in the public art no they weren't married but now they're married oh now they're married they're now married to other people I know that are also famous oh wow okay we can deduce this I reckon we'll deduce this when you're gone um and And then it just went quiet.

28:24I actually, who have I been ghosted by?

28:29No, I'm quite good at like getting people to be into it. I've got a good formula. Is it? What's your formula? I can't give it away. It's just. Do you have a time limit? No, not with the texting. Okay. What was it when you face to face? Yeah. like a do you have a do you have a line no we don't have a fucking line you do have a line no I just it's in the bedroom it's too much well I live next door to you my bed is opposite yours and so we literally have a wall next to each other blocking mine and Louise's bedrooms how mental is that do you want to know what's really good is I've actually never heard you guys have sex yeah of course because it's a really thick wall it's not that thick do you hear me singing in the shower though yes all the time yeah yeah I always sometimes think to myself really shit songs because I belt it out in the shower sometimes I'm like I get it I feel like you do that on purpose so that we can hear you.

29:21I do sometimes, yeah. Yeah, she's like, so that's how needy he is as a neighbor. He's like, oh, constantly showing off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I sometimes, every now and then, it happens every blue moon, but sometimes I'll get a Ryan coming out and be like, Sammy boy? And I'm like, yes, mate. That's what you actually want. Yeah, yeah. You love Ryan. Yeah, I do love Ryan. Ryan's my brother. I adore him. You can never get divorced. Do you hear us showering and singing? I thought you were going to say shagging. Honestly. I thought you were going to say shagging. it's been a while mate thank god for that I hope you never have sex again no I I adore Ryan I absolutely love him I think he is just the sweetest he's just a safe part of hands yeah but no he's more than that he's more than that you know sometimes I actually get a bit jealous that you I can tell that you way before him to me it's true facts no no what do you get from him that you don't get from me a normal conversation for one I can vent to Ryan right and he will listen and shut up I will vent to you and this is the same for me this is a Thompson thing I will vent to you and you will cut in every five seconds to the point where the initial vent that I wanted has veered so far into a completely different conversation I had no idea that we were even discussing I can't even remember what the thing I was venting to you about yeah because it's context no I don't need to it's like you lack context so the questions just need you to listen have to be asked you know what I mean just need you to listen it's just called a conversation two way no you don't like sometimes you just want to go and he's so good at just listening and then you know he does he goes like this he goes do you know what i think okay what do you think and he'll give me like a really concise this is what i think and then i'll be like last year i had a moment where i was in a really tough spot just mentally i'd just done the run i didn't really know where i was at with myself and stuff and um and he'd just dropped leo for school and i was actually like mate can i take five minutes time he's like i'm just walking back from school we went for a brunch together and had the best chat.

31:17Best chat. And then he invites me around for a barbecue sometimes. You never do. He invites you around for a barbecue sometimes for a cigar. He's just the best guy. Adore him. We should do more double dates with you, Tally and Ryan. What we're going to do, we've already got some stuff booked in for this weekend, by the way. I booked a little horse riding session for you guys. Yay! Okay, that's great. That's going to be so fun. That's nice that you've agreed to that because when Tally and I were trying to plan a little Wimbledon riding session, you weren't that into it. No, I am now. You are now?

31:46Yeah, no, I'm cool for that. Do you remember, oh my God, there was a time for people listening, basically, I did a show called Celebs Go Dating and we, I ended up with somebody from that show, like just dated her after Celebs Go Dating. Which one was that? The goth girl. You know her. She came on Made in Chelsea for about one episode. What, after Celebs Go Dating? Yes. I've actually never seen you on Celebs Go Dating. I bought her on Made in Chelsea and we went on a double date. Wait, with me? You, Ryan, me and her. And you literally were like, well, I don't know if this is going to last, Sam.

32:22And then she literally binned me off on camera that next day. It was the most baller thing I've ever seen anyone do. Came onto my TV show, binned me off and then fucked off. I was like, she went, see ya. I went, that is so cool. But wait, were you guys actually serious? No, we were just dating. But is it on celebs go dating? Like, are you paired with people that could be loved? Yeah. No, well, it's not going to be love, is it? But like, yeah, it's like people that you fancy. Have you just done it once or you've done it twice? I did it twice. How has it been? Pete done it like four times. Four times, yeah.

32:50Four fucking times? Yeah. Four? Mm-hmm. Wow. You know, one day, Pete will find love. Didn't he used to date like lots of young people on TOWIE? Yeah, but that's when Pete didn't really know what he was doing. He didn't really know what he wanted. Didn't really know what he wanted. I feel like Pete now does. I feel like Pete's in the best place Pete's ever been in, actually, to be fair. I think we need to settle the thing right now about you fancying Pete I think we settle it right now like do you fancy my best friend like seriously no oh my god why am I like awkwardly playing with you I actually don't know well now you look like you now you do I don't fancy Pete we spoke about this with mum last week when we recorded my podcast okay I don't fancy Pete Wicks I already explained what it is the charm is that when somebody doesn't give you enough that it makes you want for them to like you I never thought you did but it's just very funny we would also be so chaotic oh my god I'm actually now like hypothesising us being together but like I think we would both have a drinking problem there'd be a lot of smoking it'd be quite toxic it'd be a toxic relationship and it'd be a wedding that wouldn't go down too well to be fair I don't think on the note of wedding yeah who do you think we'll get married first me or you well I imagine you seeing as you're engaged and you have a ring on your finger I know it's been a while it's been a while how many years so I did who was I talking to about this we were talking about wedding speeches because you know like the wedding speech thing is one of the reasons I think why I just like can't picture the whole event it's like why it's just a lot it's a lot to handle is it?

34:40yeah do you not have a weird thing about speeches? no I love them you like so you like giving speeches yeah what about if someone's like giving a speech to you? oh even better oh really? oh yeah oh tell me how amazing I am oh you like that? oh I love it my best friend ever like when Pete does my speech is Pete doing a speech? is Pete your best man? yeah Pete will be my best man yeah that's cute wait mine's gonna be quite upset 100 % no because I'll have like a few different people different needs Ryan and Pete quite different yeah I would have I don't think Ryan's a speech guy like I would have he's an emo speech guy I don't know what it means emotional oh but you know but so but Pete can do that like I would have Ryan as the like front of like the face front of house for you surfing you drinks any of the things basically the things where like my mates are pretty like chaotic so like Pete's chaotic in his own way my best friends from school are chaotic in their own way Ryan's not organised So no, but what Ryan is, is no guys, come on, let's actually do this.

35:39Sam's getting fucking married. That guy. Okay. Yeah. So Ryan's one of the, he'd be one of the ushers. Okay. So Ryan's the guy who literally like is kind of almost big brother to everyone. He's like, guys, no, we got to do this properly. It's got to be amazing. This is Sam's big day. Pete is in charge of stag and speech. Amazing. Yeah. Have you already spoken about this? With Pete? Yeah. Yeah. I've already told him. I don't know if I would be his but I think he's just playing hard to get I think he's just playing hard to get but yeah I love it but hearing Pete say amazing things about me would be amazing Do you think that you would do a speech at our wedding?

36:18Well traditionally no But I think you probably I think maybe you could do a speech with dad or in replacement of dad Well there was talk about that I know I remember What would the speech be like? That was your idea wasn't it I think that that makes sense because you love giving speeches. Oh, mate, I would be honoured. And everyone sees you everywhere anyway, so it wouldn't exactly be surprising. I would, all right, well, let's not play it down. I would love to give you a speech. I would love to. Amazing. I would write the best speech you've ever had in your life. Don't ask me to recite it now.

36:52Would you recite it off paper? Yeah, 100%. Oh, you would? Yeah, 100%, unless you had auto cue. It's not anything to me this morning. Unless you had auto cue. but I no of course that's such a wanky thing to say no it's in like I just don't my memory is terrible but maybe people do have autocue my memory is so bad but I would know I would write down like pages upon pages it'd be like a long speech can we just say the opening like how you would address the crowd

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39:48Ready? Ding, ding, ding. Okay. in my own time there's like literally 300 people everyone's talking to you it's like the biggest day of our lives ding ding ding ding it's really important like this is actually the best speech okay um ladies and gentlemen of the jury ladies and gentlemen would you be would you actually crack a gag no I wouldn't no no no I wouldn't I don't know whether that's like fake for the podcast or real for the speech I don't know because now I've got awkward I'd be like I'd go ladies and gentlemen if I could please have your attention um this is a little speech for are you crossing your arms no i thought it was like 10 pages ladies and gentlemen normally traditionally people don't fucking interject that's gonna be the problem is i'd want to interject the speech ladies and gentlemen um please may have your attention so i'm gonna be saying a speech no so i traditionally the brother doesn't always make a speech at weddings but I feel very grateful that I've been asked to say a few words my sister is many things she can be a little bit harsh sometimes a little bit of this, a little bit of that, I'll say some of your bad qualities first, just to like Sam, that's not what people do at weddings, they don't slag them sometimes that does happen and it's really awkward, yeah, it would be great I say a couple of bad qualities first but then when you go up you go up and I'd be like she's the most kind caring beautiful loving amazing person I remember this moment she did for me and it was the most I'll never forget about that moment I remember this moment that we bonded so much together blah blah blah and then I'd be like Ryan what a guy I'm literally sorry an actual natural yawn just almost came out mate do you know how long speeches normally take to prepare are you kind and caring okay right I haven't had any time you've sprung it on me within like literally in this podcast record and I haven't had any time to work on it.

41:50If you were being serious, I will blow your mind. Blow your mind. And I'll literally be like, right, dad, a few words. Hi, Louise. Cool. Done. I'll take it back. That's helpful. I'll keep dad on the straight and narrow as well. That's helpful. Would I let you do a speech at my wedding? If you wanted to do a speech at my wedding. Would you not want to? No, I actually think I would. You don't like standing up. No, wait, I'm not better at it. Well, no, you do stand up. Your legs work. but you don't necessarily like a crowd. I think I'm better with crowds now. Are you? After all my parliamentary activity.

42:23Okay, fine. Let's delve into that really quickly because this sort of, I suppose, segues into your surrogacy journey as well. What have you been doing in Parliament? Haven't actually, not public information yet. Oh, right, okay. We have had correspondence with the Secretary of Health and Social Care. Not defence. Sorry. No, we, yeah, working on this petition for the government to appoint a maternity commissioner. We've now got over 150 ,000 signatures. I haven't even had to lean on you for this one yet. You don't have to lean on me at all. Yeah, but you're very helpful. You've got a very loud voice.

43:07And we, where are we at? We've got, they're basically debating our petition on the 20th of April, which is really, really soon. So I'll have more to say on it after that. But essentially, the maternity care in this country is not in a good spot. Maternal death rates are the highest they've been in 20 years. Black mothers are four times more likely to die than white. Asians are twice as likely to die. And it's basically a postcode lottery. And if you're one of the least wealthy people in the country, your double your chances of dying are also double that of somebody that's more wealthy and obviously this is something that I'm hugely passionate about having been through the most traumatic birth with my son Leo four years ago and I feel this year especially like so driven to try to make a lasting impact in this space what I've realized is that the health care in this country especially around the maternity space is so fragmented no one really takes responsibility there's the nhs you've got these various different trusts government bodies charities but there's no kind of cohesive strategy and we believe that maternity commissioner would change that because as you know you actually follow politics much more closely than i do um back in the days people used to be in power for an extended period of time and now everything is is there's a lot of into party parliamentary change really regularly.

44:39So people might get close to changing something and then suddenly someone else is in power. Like even West Street has been rumored he might not be in that role within the next three months. So at least if we have a maternity commissioner, they can umbrella everything and keep the people in positions of power responsible in the longer term. It's something that I think sits outside of all of the parties, frankly. And it's a huge passion to find. So anyway, it's really exciting that they're going to debate it. You can come down if you want. First come, first serve. Are you going to be in there? Yeah, so we'll be in there.

45:12I'm actually not speaking because it's just... MPs are the only ones that are allowed to speak. In the actual House of Commons? So it's not in the main chamber with the green seats yet. It's in the... There's a room with a horseshoe but it is televised. Wow. And it will be really interesting to see actually who shows up. I've asked everybody actually that signed the petition. So over 150 ,000 people received an email stating that it was going to be debated. And I've basically asked all of those people to write to their local MP to ask them to attend because there'll be, it's taking place on a Monday afternoon and there'll be a lot of other people, a lot of other like pressing world news that will be happening at the same time.

45:56So the people are kind of pulled in a million different directions. But I'm really hoping that for the people that do value babies and mothers in the Houses of Parliament, that they will show up. How crazy. And they will support them. There might be some people who like, nay, something like that. Isn't that crazy? So I went into the House of Lords, which is the other side of the building, and there was a question, an oral question that was chaired in the main chamber in the Houses of Lords. And a lot of people said, were against it. Why? Not a lot of people. There were like some naysayers that stood up and they were like, well, the whole thing is actually documented so you can read everybody's responses.

46:39I'm going to pull out the people and start naming and shaming. But, you know, someone's retort might have been, oh, well, if we appoint a, this is my voice, if we appoint a commissioner for maternity, then, you know, there's lots of issues within the NHS. Do we have to appoint commissioners for all other segments of the NHS? Yeah, but also it's a little bit different, in my opinion, the mortality space to say like the gastroenterology department, which is not, which doesn't have the stark statistics currently, which are getting worse. Infant mortality is on the rise. Like one in three people are saying that their birth is traumatic.

47:23That's mad. And we have a declining population. Yeah, that's crazy. So people just don't want to have kids or they certainly don't want to have a second one. Lots of people are one and done. But yeah, that's my two pence on the matter. I've got to say, I just look at me, I'm just telling you, I sort of fluctuate between like sort of like having a laugh and we do the serious thing. But like I, as a brother, feel listening to you like really fucking proud of you. like the fact that you you dug your teeth in so much to something that like realistically you don't need to do like you're that's a calling that you felt you've had to get in touch with people and you've had to put yourself in that position you had to go and stand in parliament you've had to go and get petitions signed you've done all these things off your own back and as your brother somebody who that there's probably quite people who would have gone through what you've gone I don't want to do anything I don't want to be in that world anymore I don't want to be anywhere near it because it's PTSD so the fact that you're wading back into that world I'm very very proud of you and the things that you are doing and as a brother when you're 36 and you're making a difference like my sister's making a difference I never thought I would be this person and to be honest it has taken four years and this is really like the entry point for me this year 2026.

48:59I'll be honest I was really naive when I first set up this petition I thought it'd be get the signatures and it's done like they're just going to make this huge change. Yeah nothing really changes. And I said, like, you know, I'm doing it with Theo Clark, this ex-MP, and we're kind of going back and forth. And I was like, oh, my God, how long are we going to be working on this for? And then I had this realization, this stark realization that this is like a life's work. Like, it's not something that just changes overnight. It's something you dedicate a lot of time for. And it does make me feel emotional because the reason I'm doing it, it like it really stems from like a feeling that I just can't bear other people to go through.

49:34yeah and when and I was thinking a bit about this this morning because actually we recorded an episode for our podcast but we didn't get around to talking about it so I'm grateful to be asked the questions but when I was really really not in a good spot I used to have these like awful intrusive thoughts and I used to imagine people that were I used to have these thoughts

49:59basically I like just got by because of like the immense privilege that I have like I had family around the corner had some money to pay for therapy I lived close to a hospital which meant I actually survived on like three different emergency scenarios and I could stop working and I used to think about fucking hell if there were like teenagers or people that were younger that were going through PTSD and were at school obviously they wouldn't be having kids or at university or in a position where they couldn't escape where they couldn't basically just shut their whole world down for a year to recover like I wouldn't I don't know I just I don't see how those people even make it through and then I used to think about people who were you know mothers giving birth in like war zones whether it's like Ukraine or Palestine with no access to pain relief and it used to actually just like break me i was like i can't and obviously that's international work and i've not kind of gone that far yet but i knew that i just couldn't let other people suffer in the same way that i had like it's it's just now ingrained in me like i can't just let it i can't just let it be i remember i remember a horrible time where you you were saying some pretty dicey things when you were in the worst place and i was like fuck like i remember that yeah i literally wanted to die like every day i remember you being like being like i want a plane to crash into the house and just end it all and i was like fuck i don't know what to do here and like and you're right like someone's going through that and i'm literally your family next door and i'm like lying in bed with you because I can lie in bed with you.

51:49Do you remember, like screaming and crying? Yeah, mate. And I could lie in bed with you whilst you were screaming and crying and try and console you and stuff because I could take myself away from my work as well. Yeah, it was really fucking bad. No, but look, I always say this, you're the strongest person I know. By a mile. There's no well buts or anything. You are the strongest person I know by a fucking mile. By a mile. I had a cyst out of my vocal cords. I had a cyst out and I genuinely thought I was dying like I remember getting put to sleep when I have a sister out on my vocals and being I don't know what this says about me but being terrified never been put to sleep before and I was actually like oh my god and they like put the thing into my hand and I remember I meant to talk to you about it but I never did I remember having the thing being put into my hand I had the numbing cream in my hand and which apparently not everyone does but I didn't know at the time and kids uh yeah they just no but they just they put it on i didn't know they didn't ask they didn't ask you you asked for it because you said i genuinely didn't yeah you did they were like we could see this guy's a little nervous i honestly didn't i i don't know why they put it on um they put it on both as well um and they were putting it in and i remember being like fuck like i'm so out of control and i was like i was really scared and i was only having a sister move and apparently the recovery was like wasn't that bad and you were the last person i thought about really and i was like i cannot imagine what my sister like the fact that you were getting put under to get like your colon removed like that's just one of the times but like i think the scariest is being like wheeled into that room where you're having everything put in so like cannulas and arterial lines like seeing yourself like bleaching out and you're being like i just don't know what what's going on there's no time to even think am i gonna wake up yeah am i gonna wake up and what's going to happen to me in this operation who's going to be in there like am i ever going to see people again i remember i but i remember sitting there and thinking it would really hit home and it sounds probably quite stupid because they're so different but being put to sleep is being put to sleep and i remember being like imagine how my sister felt not knowing what the outcome would be and then and i remember being like i had this uh this surge of like pride to the wrong word but just like so much like respect i always respected you but like i was like fuck like mate i've never i i don't know if i'd tell you enough i'm i'm just i'm so proud of you i'm like not proud it's the wrong word because it's not like i'm not proud i'm like in awe of we do need to touch on your surrogacy journey as well.

54:41You're documenting it on He Said, She Said, which is part of the Staying Relevant family now. Woo! Yeah. Woo, woo. First of all, you enjoying that? Loving it, yeah. Nice. Had a great little conversation earlier. Me and the ride dog. Lovely. Good, good, good. I'm not really involved in any of this. Pete's sort of more involved than I am, which I think kind of does work, to be fair. So are we doing this? Are we doing this? As a family, are we doing this? Are we going on the Sargsy route? Is that where we're going? We are. I feel like we've had very little conversation about this. We never talk about it.

55:15We don't. Because I think like the truth is when we hang out, we like to keep it quite light and frothy at home. Like we don't always need to be having the deeper meaningfuls. But I should update you because you're my brother. Ryan and I are very keen. Actually, if you listen to the latest, he said she said episode. i'm slightly more keen um to grow our family and going down the surrogacy route is the option that is afforded to us with everything that i've been through physically and also mentally and i've done so much research it's a huge undertaking okay there's literally a mountain size project there is so much to know there's so much legal stuff involved there are so many different well i say so many different options the surrogacy in this country which is altruistic which means that the surrogate carrying your child is legally the mother.

56:06So that's complicated. We've looked at doing it abroad. So in the US, in Mexico, in Georgia. We used to go to Ukraine. I should probably come with you. Well, you know what? That would be really lovely. So where we're at currently is we've frozen the embryos. They pull some eggs out. It's daily injections. And then at the end of a kind of 10-day to two-week period, you go in and have a procedure. and yes they like suck them out they suck these eggs out of the ovaries yeah with a transvaginal ultrasound i didn't get very many eggs when i did it the first time around and then i went to a different clinic and i got some more eggs and so and actually ryan's got a few sperm problems so actually between us we've got like quite a few problems so i've got my womb problem in that like it's not hospitable i've not got a load of eggs but i've got some eggs ryan's got some sperm but not grey sperm.

56:58And then they combine the sperm and the egg together and it makes a little embryo, which is your gene little pool there. And then we get it fertilized. And then five days later it becomes something called a blastocyst and that is like a good to go cannon plant into a womb. Wow. And they fire it in there. Fire it in there with like a fucking bazooka. Maybe they get like a, I imagine like a syringe or something. Something like that. Squirt it in. Why is it? Pippa. I think just let Louise speak about it no Sam I like the I like the naive questions yeah so then actually we need we're having to pay for a courier to take it abroad in like a super turbo like a weird like little spaceship thing that's minus gazillion degrees to keep them alive cryo chamber that see you do know no I just know science I know it's like sci-fi it's a cryo chamber you can actually live forever if you have cryo chambers as well you should try and actually see if they have a big one for you because that's how I want to carry on going.

57:58Wait, tell me a bit about that. So basically, if you put... But you won't survive. If you strap yourself into a cryo chamber, you can freeze yourself until you decide to... Yeah, but you'll die because you'll be so cold. No, so that's where you're wrong. They don't freeze you alive. Yeah, they do. Who have they ever frozen alive? That's just not true, is it? No, they're going to do that. We're not having an actual argument on whether that's true or not. But wait, but then you can't live while you're frozen. So what, you get woken up in like 100 years' time? No, so you're near when near death. No.

58:25Yes, yes. I'm being serious have you ever watched Interstellar the movie yeah I love Hans Zimmer do you know what I think Pete would be really Pete would understand a lot about eggs and stuff would he yeah no he would why the fuck would Pete understand about eggs because he knows everything has he frozen eggs no but he Pete does know a lot so we've actually got four embryos what fertilised embryos like four potential kids fuck would you want Leo's sibling to be a four-year-old girl ooh Oh, I'd love a girl niece. That'd be cute. Oh, what, like your hypothetical? Male niece. What's Olive? Olive, no, Olive's peach, rose is mine.

59:05So this could be a rose. I think you should have two boys and a girl. That's kind of what I want. Yeah, that'd be cool. If we do get around to having a healthy baby at some point next year, which is what we would love to happen if we're lucky enough. You'd like me to be the godfather. Could you? Wait. I feel like Pete was going to be Leo's godfather. I love it. Fuck off. I haven't seen Pete in ages. We need to reconnect. We do, yeah. I feel like, could you, if we have to do it abroad, before we can get the parental order to come back into this country, we're going to have to live in a country, another country, for a while.

59:38Can you come out with us? How long are you going to live there for? A month. I know, Sam's freaking out. He's not going to have a neighbour to pass. That's mad. A month's fine. I can do it with a month. I'd love to come out. Yeah, where are we going? I'm not really in a position to dispose of that. well I'll tell you where you can catch that he said she said the SR production produced he said she said podcast and do you know what Louise is actually going to be hanging around for the bonus as well so we are not only going to be joined by Louise we're also going to be joined by producer our very own we even get the sofa out for her to be there as well so thank you so much Louise and we will see you in the bonus thank you so much cheers buddy This has been a Staying Relevant production.

1:00:52We'll see you next time. That's K-Y-F-A-I-R dot com. Way fair, every style, every home. Queen Carvania stood haloed by the morning sun. An army hung on her every word. My champions, I have sold my chariot on Carvana. T 'was a lovely SUV, an inexplicably queenly offer. They're even coming to the castle to collect it. Tonight, we feast. An offer you can feast on. Sell your car today on Carvana. Pick up fees, may apply. Here's a tip for you. There's a podcast out there with fans waiting to be your next customer. They tune in every week. They trust the host. And that host wants to talk about brands like yours in their own words to their audience.

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1:02:11Hello, Relevanters! We wanted to let you know that you can hear exclusive bonus episodes of Staying Relevant every month on Amazon Music. We are going to be playing Snog Marry Avoid, one of our favourite games, all with fictional characters. So prepare yourself for Sam to snog Woody from Toy Story and for me to marry Pocahontas. And possibly the genie from Aladdin. We don't know yet. We were sort of like undecided on that one. That's an avoid for me, that one genie. I don't know. I quite like it. Listen to monthly bonus episodes exclusively on Amazon Music and enjoy ad-free listening on Amazon Music for all episodes of Staying Relevant with your Prime membership.