Is Pete entering the I'm A Celeb Jungle?

0:00Therapy's biggest impact doesn't show up in some dramatic breakthrough. It shows up in the smallest moments. You bite your tongue instead of escalating. You put your phone down instead of firing off that text. You say what you actually mean instead of what would hurt someone else the most. Nobody applauds those moments, but they quietly change your life. That's what growing feels like. And that's exactly what Grow Therapy is here for. Grow is therapy that works, covered by insurance. Sessions average$21 with insurance and some pay as little as$0 depending on their plan. There are no subscriptions, no long-term commitments.

0:37You just pay per session. Grow connects you with thousands of high-quality licensed therapists across the U.S. offering both virtual and in-person sessions nights and weekends. You can search by what matters, like insurance, specialty, identity, or availability. And you can book a therapy session in minutes and begin in as little as two days, not the national 48-day average. See if you could pay as little as$0 for therapy in seconds at growtherapy.com slash ACAST. That's growtherapy.com slash ACAST. growtherapy.com slash ACAST. Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plan. This ad is sponsored by ZocDoc.

1:20Hi, it's Danny Pellegrino from Everything Iconic. Have you been putting off that annual doctor's appointment because you don't want to make the call? Or maybe you've been meaning to find a new dentist, but you have no idea where to start. I find that's especially true when you move. It's hard to find your people. I've been there, which is why I use ZocDoc. Now, as a busy podcaster parent and someone who's always juggling a million things, I love anything that makes life easier. And ZocDoc lets you search and compare local in-network doctors with over 250 ,000 providers across more than 200 specialties.

1:51You can read reviews from real patients, find a provider who feels like the right fit, see actual appointment openings, and book instantly. I recently had a last-minute health issue pop up and I needed to see someone fast. Instead of calling around or sitting on hold, I found a doctor on ZocDoc and booked an appointment in just a few minutes. It made the whole process so much less stressful. Now, taking care of your health just got easier. Download the ZocDoc app today. That's ZocDoc, Z-O-C-D-O-C, and book that appointment on your to-do list.

2:46You. Go to Bombas.com slash audio and use code audio for 20 % off your first purchase. That's Bombas.com and use code audio. Welcome to Staying Relevant, the bonus episode hosted by me, Sam Thompson, and Peter, James, Jonathan, Joseph, Wicks. This is the bonus episode, which means it's Thursday, so you'll be able to watch this visually on Josh and Kira's YouTube channel on a Sunday. and obviously Monday's main episode, which came out audibly on Monday, you can now watch on Josh and Kira's YouTube channel as of 5pm last night, which was Wednesday. This episode will contain swearing. As always, if you don't like it, go f*** yourself.

3:24Make sure you rate, review and do all that crap. As it is the bonus episode, if you want a feature in the bonus episode, then email the worst email address in the world, which is hello at srproductions.co.uk. We are going to start with an email and a very serious one. Oh, bloody hell. Again, I think it's aimed at you Oh no Parking wars We are involved in a battle of the bays At Staying Redmond Productions We have received an email informing us That our car parking spot is out of action this week As they are trimming the tree over the parking bay And that is because Sam Well, it's a struggle for him to park the truck under the tree So they've had to trim some of it So where are you parking this week?

4:11I haven't parked anywhere because we're obviously off to a photo shoot me and Pete later, which is very exciting. And so I couldn't drive to that. So yeah, I just took an Uber in. I parked in our bay this week. I messaged Pri to ensure that I wasn't parking in the wrong bay and told Josh to get the fuck out of the bay that I pay for. So he parked in the gym, which was nice. But I didn't tell Josh that. I told Pippa because as we know, I don't know if you know this, but Josh has also taken on role as Pippa's Uber driver. Yeah. Because he gives her a lift everywhere. Because she's become lazy and believes that at this point now, because she pretty much runs the business, that she can just get people to do whatever she wants.

4:53There's a point of her influencer career. Josh, yeah, well, yeah, exactly. She gets cars places now. It just so happens that Josh is the driver of that. And just for context as well, just in case you think it's just sort of two friends, you know, driving in together, she sits in the back. Right, that was one time. She sits in the back and Josh has to ask her whether or not she would like radio music. She quite often says, it's okay, I've got AirPods in. Yeah, I've got to make a few calls. She messages beforehand just to say I'd like a quiet ride. So no chit-chat. She slams the door. She slams...

5:26You don't open the door and close it for her? So it's not an exec then? Well, it's only Harris. That's really interesting though, actually. I always find that whether it's my sister or any sort of female, slam the fucking car door when they get out, like, with real pizzazz. And I don't understand it. I don't know what it is. You really want to make an entrance when you get out of the car? I've never noticed that. Mate, my sister, honestly, she'll get out, slam it, and I'm like, what are you doing that for? I've done ex-girlfriends as well. Pippa obviously does it. I feel like it's because, especially with your car, it's a big car.

6:08So you imagine it's going to be a heavy door. Yeah. But they're weighted, the doors. You can just nudge it. I feel like, yeah, I feel like you could just close it. But I feel like ladies sometimes think, God, this is going to be an effort, and then crack the fucking thing closed. Crack it, mate. Yeah. And then, you know, you've got Match in one hand, Keith Janglin in the other. And see, we all know that's what's just happened. Well, I mean, this is the point, is that, you know, Josh may have to get a bigger car for all of Pippa's bags because she quite often turns up anywhere she goes with at least three bags.

6:38Big Stanley Cup, you know, you've got to get that water in, obviously, you know. Yeah, whatever she needs. I mean, she literally, she's nomadic, Pippa, which means that at any point she could set up shop and just live because she's carrying 10 and a number of different things from Mountain Warehouse, which is her favourite shop. I'm hoping that's not where you're getting the heels from for Vegas. No, do you advise me on M &S? Okay, excellent. M &S, we love it. Right, so first email, Sam. All right, here we go. So this is from Lila. What a lovely name. Hi, guys. I'm not usually someone to, what, what?

7:14I think it might be Lila. Fuck's sake. Lila, what a beautiful name. Hi, guys. I'm not usually someone to email in, but I watch your podcast weekly and it never fails to put a smile on my face. so I'd like to say thank you for that sometimes life can get pretty hard but watching Staying Relevant and particularly behind the scenes by the way yes I did have a question what are your thoughts on fanfics they are a controversial topic and I recently have started writing them as a way to wind down when I'm stressed I will admit when I watch the episode Staying Relevant where Louise told Sam she felt he should date someone normal it sparked an idea so I planned and started writing a Sam Thompson fanfic so I've attached a link to my email.

7:59I cannot wait to get your book and read it. Hope you all have a brilliant Halloween and Christmas. Never stop being you. You're all amazing. All the best, Lila. What a lovely message. Lila. Fuck. Lila. Right, I'm going to read the fanfic to you in a minute. Oh my God, we've actually got it. But before that happens, what's a fanfic? Fanfiction. A fanfiction. Not a clue. Yeah, yeah. So basically it's where a fan of a certain thing. normally it's a fan of a certain like show or fantasy novel or something like that that's come out as a movie so for example there's loads like harry potter fanfics lord of the rings fanfics when there's an already there world um and then they basically make their own version in that world that's written by a fan are we actually me and you are in a fan fiction of one direction i don't know i still and not because you didn't explain it clearly but because it's beyond me why and why like what what's the point what i don't understand it's like a way for fans to write it's like a fantasy is it like the sims kind of where so in this particular world within a world that you control no it's written as if like sam is your boyfriend or you are the person's boyfriend so it's as if it's as if so so what i'm about to read yeah which by the way uh the blurb is the hidden truth yeah it's as if sam is part of her life yeah it's it's written as if as if he so so like he's not a real person but it's no it's still him so it's still so he is a real person that he's a real person that's part of her life yeah so like ryan's in it louise is in it leo's in it but it's like this person writing it is is also part of it and what do you do with it so oh Okay, so it's as if they are in Sam's life.

9:51Yeah. And why? So they can live out a fantasy that they are, like, with Sam and in his family. And it's... Oh, God. It's their way of writing, like, about their fantasy, which would be, like, to be in a relationship with Sam and be part of the family and stuff. And, like, there's a chapter called, like, Stolen Glances and stuff like that. Stolen Glances. Okay, prepare yourself, Sam. Yeah. You ready? Yeah. So the fanfic, The Hidden Truth. Some stories begin quietly in the corner of a busy kitchen with laughter that isn't yours or a casserole dish carried next door. Clara Pembroke isn't looking for the spotlight.

10:37She moves softly through the noise, steady and calm, the one who makes things work. Sam Thompson has never known how to live without the noise, always moving, talking, thinking faster than everyone else, chasing brightness even when it wears him out. When their paths cross more often, Clara doesn't try to tame him or turn the volume down. She notices, accepts and quietly anchors him in ways he never expected. And in return, Sam's chaos pulls her into life louder and warmer than she thought she belonged in. Sometimes the people who change your life aren't the ones you were looking for at all. That is fucking brilliant.

11:17That is so good. That is so good. She knows me. She gets me. I need to hear more about Clara. Who the fuck's Clara? Clara Pembroke, the bird who I'm with, in a fictional sense. What's the point? Because basically she's written a scenario in where I have dated a lady called Clara Pembroke who, and I believe in Lila's mind, is the perfect, perfect person for me to be with. So is that all she's wrote? Or there was a whole... There was a whole, like, novel. No. You're in it, Josh is in it. How many pages? It's like, I'm reading it now, it's chapters and chapters. Oh my God! Send it to me now. Please read out a couple of chapter headings.

12:10So Stolen Glances is one, The Hidden Truth is another. Sure. Okay. Chapter one, The Casserole. Chapter two, Stolen Glances. Chapter three, Quiet Care. Chapter four, Small Glimpses. Chapter five, Home Sweet Home. Chapter six, Hot Fever. Chapter seven, Sparks. Chapter eight, Entwined. Chapter nine, Heartfelt Compassion. Can we have Hot Fever, please? Hot Fever sounds like it could be a little bit dicey. If you want to, if you send it to me, I'll read it. Is this where it gets a little bit steamy? Because a lot of these fanfics, it gets quite steamy under the covers. And people are licking all sorts of things.

12:48Have you ever heard those erotic novels? No, no one's heard that? Okay. I just thought, oh, sorry, sorry, I've got this wrong. The whole book is called The Hidden Truth. And it is the Pembroke Legacy series, The Hidden Truth. This is just book one, so there's more to come.

13:12sorry and what I've just read sorry I was confused by this isn't a chapter that is just the blurb so that's just the blurb on the book I love it chapter 6 fever I'm going to start and read this strap yourselves in alright this is the first time that I've obviously seen or read this the first clue came in the morning by 8 o 'clock Clara still hadn't arrived Usually she was through the door by then, Albert in tow, hair slightly damp from the bus ride, always with a quick smile for Leo before shepherding him into shoes and coat. Clara might forget her bus pass or her own breakfast, but never Leo.

13:53Louise checked the clock again, frowning. She's late! Ryan looked up from tying Leo's shoelaces. Maybe the bus was delayed. Not this late, Louise murmured, already pulling out her phone. She called once, then twice, straight to voicemail. Sam, perched on the arm of the sofa with the coffee in hand, raised his brows. Clara? She's not answering. Louise tried to keep her voice steady, but the knot in her chest was already forming. I'll take him, Ryan said quickly, grabbing the school bag. She might still be on her way. But when he returned, the knot tightened. He set the keys on the counter, his face grim.

14:29She wasn't there. Her brother came with Albert instead. Louise's stomach dropped. Liam? Yeah. Who's Albert? Who the fuck's Leo? I don't know. Sam's only been mentioned once in his own fanfic. What the fuck is going on, Louise? Ryan? Leo? Yeah. She said she was sick. He forgot to call. He looked worried. Really worried. The room went still. Louise's heart thudded in her ears. Sam didn't hesitate. He set his mug down with a decisive thud, already reaching for his jacket. Come on, we're going. The terrace street looked different with Sam there, bleaker somehow. The bins lined unevenly, paint pealing on doors, the hum of traffic heavy in the air.

15:10Louise walked fast, her worries spurring her on. Sam matched her stride, jaw set tight. Liam's police car was parked at an angle outside. The front door opened before they knocked. Liam stood there in uniform, his face pale with exhaustion. She's upstairs, he said quietly. His voice was calm, but his eyes betrayed him. She's been like this since yesterday. I should have called, but I was trying to sort Albert. I'm on a double shift. So is Max. Neither of us can be there. And I don't. His hand dragged down his face. I don't know what to do. I can't leave her like this, but I can't take Albert with me either.

15:44What the fuck's happened to Clara? Who's Albert? Who the fuck is Leo? Calm, guys, calm. Louise stepped in without hesitation. Then we'll do it. Albert can stay with us. Leo will love it. And Clara comes too. She needs looking after and she won't get it lying here on her own. But what's wrong with fucking Clara? Calm, calm. The boys don't need to catch whatever this is. Relief flickered through Liam's face, tempted by guilt. Are you sure? Positive. Louise's tone was firm, decisive. You've carried her long enough. Let us take some of the weight. Sam didn't speak. He was already moving. Sweet. Already climbing down the stairs.

16:24I'm going to be honest with you, a hot fever we imagined was going to be sexual. Otherwise a sex scene. What it turns out to be is someone's sick. Oh, she's got a fever. It's an actual fever. We find out a little bit further on. I won't keep reading. But later on, it's cleared up when Liam says, it's flu. Shut up. So.

16:49But Sam was worried because Sam shakes his head, his eyes fixed on her power face. And Sam comes out because he's very observant and he always knows what to do in these situations. Sam says, she needs a doctor. I mean, go and read it. if you want. It's interesting. I still don't, despite having read some fan fiction now, don't understand the point. Well, normally what they do is a bit more romantic. This is sort of mundane, everyday stuff. Someone's got the flu and taking Leo to school. Someone's got the flu. Leo's going to school. Ryan's tying the shoelaces. You're worried and think she needs a doctor.

17:30There's some geese called Liam and Max. Albert. And Albert. We don't know who they are. maybe they're part of Clara's love. We don't know. We just don't know. But Clara's it. Let's hope, Godspeed, Clara. Godspeed. And let's just hope you make a speedy recovery. I actually know her, Clara. Yeah. I actually know her, Clara. Okay, good. Is she okay? Yeah, she's fine. Does she need a doctor? I don't know. Just send her a text message and just make sure she's all right, just in case. I mean, look, the fanfic stuff is interesting. I do not fucking get it whatsoever. whatever well no but as i said normally it's a little bit more have you ever listened to an erotic novel before no have you not oh my god they are have you but wait wait pippa is this like oh as if yeah 50 shades of gray yeah no i just the way you were surprised pete hadn't i didn't have him down as that pippa you must have i've never listened to an erotic novel you read an erotic novel no 50 shades of shit no i've never a lot of girls love an erotic novel well by the sounds of it so do you no it's not you know it's not that it's just like what i would think from a from one of those novels is more of like a men are turned on by what they see women are turned on by what they hear what they hear so what i didn't realize though i thought it was going to be very much like he grabbed me and kissed me close and like held me tight you showing her a tiktok and your cheeks like brush me and clara yeah i just skipped to the end normally it's like very like i thought it's going to be sort of a bit like that our cheeks brush but erotic novels like he grabbed me by my waist pinned me down entered me yeah it's like that kind of vibe if um I mean I Clara not Clara Lila Lila Lila if you're going to call it hot fever I feel like it's kind of false advertising especially if it's just a cheek brushing what I would call that is sort of lukewarm illness as opposed to hot fever got the flu we'll come back to fanfic let's get on to question time shall we question time so we're going to move on to some questions which go up on our socials every week at Stan Reddleton Podcast the first one Sam, will he face a forfeit for not attending the Monday meeting?

19:44no, because I feel like everyone's just giving up on me to be fair no, no, no, we could never give up on you however, I do feel like this is potentially something that you shouldn't be involved in whether you should be part of a forfeit should I get a say? you can't have a say on whether you should have a forfeit from your missing of the meeting. So team vote. Show of hands if you think Sam should have a forfeit.

20:10Unanimous. So maybe we will come up with a forfeit. Maybe what we should do is ask you what Sam's forfeit for missing Monday meeting should be. You get to decide. This is interactive now, this podcast. Yeah, we'll do it. We love a poll. So maybe we'll get the audience to decide what your forfeit should be. All right, fine. Yeah? All right. Cool. Next up. Oh, this one's a good one. Have the boys seen the Skims bush thong? Thoughts, please. I have discussed this already. I have seen it. I think it's mental.

20:49Therapy's biggest impact doesn't show up in some dramatic breakthrough. It shows up in the smallest moments. You bite your tongue instead of escalating. You put your phone down instead of firing off that text. You say what you actually mean instead of what would hurt someone else the most. Nobody applauds those moments, but they quietly change your life. That's what growing feels like. And that's exactly what Grow Therapy is here for. Grow is therapy that works, covered by insurance. Sessions average$21 with insurance and some pay as little as$0 depending on their plan. There are no subscriptions, no long-term commitments.

21:26You just pay per session. Grow connects you with thousands of high-quality, licensed therapists across the U.S., offering both virtual and in-person sessions, nights and weekends. You can search by what matters, like insurance, specialty, identity, or availability. And you can book a therapy session in minutes and begin in as little as two days, not the national 48-day average. See if you could pay as little as$0 for therapy in seconds at growtherapy.com slash ACAST. That's growtherapy.com slash ACAST. growtherapy.com slash ACAST. Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plan. This ad is sponsored by ZocDoc.

22:09Hi, it's Danny Pellegrino from Everything Iconic. Have you been putting off that annual doctor's appointment because you don't want to make the call? Or maybe you've been meaning to find a new dentist, but you have no idea where to start. I find that's especially true when you move. It's hard to find your people. I've been there, which is why I use ZocDoc. Now, as a busy podcaster parent and someone who's always juggling a million things, I love anything that makes life easier. And ZocDoc lets you search and compare local in-network doctors with over 250 ,000 providers across more than 200 specialties.

22:40You can read reviews from real patients, find a provider who feels like the right fit, see actual appointment openings and book instantly. I recently had a last minute health issue pop up and needed to see someone fast. Instead of calling around or sitting on hold, I found a doctor on ZocDoc and booked an appointment in just a few minutes. It made the whole process so much less stressful. Now taking care of your health just got easier. Download the ZocDoc app today. That's ZocDoc, Z-O-C-D-O-C and book that appointment on your to-do list. Hello, I'm Monica Reinagle, host of the Nutrition Diva podcast.

23:14Summer is here and with it, the hot and sticky weather. A morning working in the garden or maybe on the golf course can leave you more depleted than you realize. And plain water isn't always the most efficient way to restore the balance. That's where Liquid IV comes in. Its science-backed formula is clinically proven to hydrate faster than water alone. Whether you're exercising, playing outside, or simply surviving a summer heat wave, it's an easy way to stay hydrated. Shop now at liquidiv.com. Liquid IV, hydration that goes wherever life takes you.

23:51I haven't seen it. Here it is. So Skims, which is, um, oh my God, the Kardashian, Kim Kardashian's brand, uh, that does like leggings and stuff, didn't it? Yep. Has released a thong covered in hair. I don't get why. What? I mean, I have no issue with a little bit of bush like in terms of like if you want to have a bit of hair down there and like anywhere like your body, your choice. You know? Like, do you know what I mean? You can do whatever you want. I'll do whatever I want with my hair. But I don't know why So just to clarify then, because we're not just talking about hair, we're talking specifically on the pubic region.

24:38What do you do with your hair? My pubic region? Yes. I like to keep it neat. How often are we still V-ting? We're not V-ting anymore, no. We're not V-ting anymore. We've moved away from the V-ting. But I like to keep myself pruned. Have you pruned for Vegas? No, because obviously I'm not going to be doing anything in Vegas. Normally before a holiday, people are tiling themselves out. Josh has had a haircut, the head variety. I'm not entirely sure if Josh has pruned his bush. I don't know, but I can't understand why you would strap on some hair onto a thong. I can't understand that. I genuinely don't get it.

25:16But I spoke to Liv Atwood about this, and she said she's basically, Kim K's just a marketing genius. It's basically like, it's not for any point. It's just something that people will buy because Kim K's bought it out, and it's basically stocking filler and it'll fucking sell out. I believe it has sold out. No, it hasn't. No, it hasn't. And I just don't, but I don't, I don't think, I don't know if she's explained it. If she has, then someone please tell me what the point is. Does anyone know? I mean, she literally must be able to just do anything. I tell you, you know what? It makes your, should we sell a fart in a jar seem quite, because.

25:52That's what I'm saying. Because I think she could and it would sell out. So maybe you just need to get to them upper echelons of fucking Kardashian and then you can sell your own fucking pubic underwear. I just can't understand how that's... With all your cut-offs. That's got to be a joke. If you're getting that in your stock and you're like, ah, fair play, that's quite funny. I mean, I'm, again, reluctant to ask because, I mean... Well, let's ask the team. No, I don't think it's... Ladies, would any of you buy a... Let's ask Josh. Josh, would you buy a... I wouldn't buy it. No, you wouldn't buy it.

26:21Well, you know, I don't know if it's for people who struggle with pubic bush, similar to you struggle with chin hair. Would you buy a Skims beard that you could stick on? Like a beard wig? Yeah. Like a Pete Wick's beard wig? Well, it doesn't have to be specific to me. Oh, yeah, sorry. There are other people with... No, I wouldn't. No, I don't think I'd buy it. So... Pippa, would you ever buy a Skims beard wig? With your balding bollocks, would you buy a pubic wig? Is that effectively what it is? No, but whose hair is it? It's faux hair, it's faux hair. It has sold out every colour, every size.

26:54No, but it can't... Pippa, okay. I mean, how do you colour match? As a lady, as a lady, why are people... Careful. Why would, as a lady of the earth... Careful. Of the earth, yeah. As a woman of the day. Of the day. Lady of the earth, woman of the day. Yeah, all of those things. As a day walking woman. Yeah, at night time you lay down. Yeah. Why are ladies and females, all men, but mostly females I imagine buying that.

27:30What's the attraction to some people? Well, it says on the website that it's their most daring panty yet. I didn't finish reading that before I started. I'm really sorry. Can you delve into the national women's mind? I don't want to. And just figure out why people are buying the Bush skims. as a lady. Well, I'll tell you why, mate, because it is one daring penalty. But like... Maybe it's because... Maybe if your partner's into that thing. Oh, right. That kind of thing, and you don't like having it on yourself, maybe it's... Maybe it's a way of having it temporarily. Or maybe it's like down with the patriarchy.

28:14Maybe. I won't shave. Maybe. What? Well, you know, sometimes it's just like, you know, I'm not doing this for... Sorry, did you start that? sentence with down the patriarchy down with the patriarchy yeah i'm down with the patriarchy look at my fucking dairy hair daring hairy panty i mean so we don't know we don't quite know why this is selling out what it is people are you know and i'm just gonna join the pete wicks train here and i maybe i shouldn't be doing hell but like people are people are mental like how how are you like unless there is a reason like people said like an actual like a moral reason or some other reason that you're like i want to go and buy them but like but like how the fuck are you how are you going well fuck me kids kids from skim so i have to buy a pair of them yeah but just just to clarify though before we go into that if you do have a moral and ethical reason why the skims daring hairy panties for you then you're excluded from this you're not mental but like because morally you have a reason how are you following that trend and being like no it's the right to sit like this is so cool i mean i've seen it i i the hair on a lady or no no no the hair is on the outside of the panty but what's the point which i kind of i i don't understand because i i I assumed initially before I'd see it that maybe the hair, that is fucking vile.

29:46Why? Why? Because it doesn't make it any more enjoyable to wear. That's what I don't understand. If anything, it's probably a bit more itchy. Do you have different colour hair? Yeah. Oh, my God. What is the point? No, it's just, I just can't. I start looking at it. I actually start worrying about society. So it's not age relevant. You know, if you are an elder lady and you want a daring panty, then go get yourself because, you know, I mean, Christ. I just start worrying about things then because I'm just like, God, there are enough people in this world who would buy that simply because it's come from some girl who was on the Kardashians.

30:34So do you see why now the fart in the jar was an odd thing for me?

30:42No, because... No, it's different. No, because I feel like that's a fetish. Because morally, if you need a fart in a jar... I feel like that's a fetish. I feel like some people... What, that? No, no, the fart in the jar. The fart in the jar is a fetish. People sell farts in jars on OnlyFans, by the way. I don't know how you can guarantee that there's a fart in there, but they do. Well, I mean, how do you trap it? It's fart in a jar. Yeah, but if you get that on there before... Yeah, you've just got to be quick with the jar lid on. So how does that process work? Well, you put it down there, you go...

31:09And then you just whack it on.

31:13and then i imagine like opening unsealing that after it's had some travel time as well there is nothing like topical conversations that's damn relevant hey it is what it is man like we skimms bush thong we got to talk about it it's out there i wish i wish the guardian reckon and it's a Bush revival. Oh, right, okay, cool. But as I said before... The Guardian. Fuck. But, mate, Pete... You're on the brink of a Bush revival. But that's fine. You're on the same path here. Look, we're nothing wrong with Bush. Let's go off on a slight tangent. Do you like Bush? That's exactly where I was going to go.

31:56Yeah. Do you know what? I don't mind it. I don't mind it. I have no... When was the last time you... when was the last time you got lost in the bushes because it's it's rare because it's you know it went out of fashion and now it's coming back 70s and 80s it was big and now it's coming back you've been single for a lot of this year have you seen a revival in the bush not quite as of yet but like no no as of yet but like i but as i said like if you want to if you want to grow bush then grow you know i don't have a problem with it. And if you want to beat that bad boy... It's not for me. It's not for you.

32:36No, sorry, what I mean is it's not for me to tell you how to design your bush. It's not for Sam. When was the last time you saw grass? I've seen grass this year. Yeah? Yeah. Lovely. I think it suits some people. You know, different haircuts for different people. It's very, you know, it's similar to your head. If it suits, you know, go with it. Exactly. If it doesn't... Very 70s, isn't it? Very 60s, 70s. Yeah, it's simply, and I think it died out. The 90s really, really was the kind of start of the Hollywood. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. You know, and, you know, everything goes around in circles. Fashion, trends.

33:16Exactly. They come and they go. Very retro. Yeah. So, yeah. Now, this is an interesting question. Bush forever. Bush forever. And we don't hate it. We don't hate it. You slay queens. Like, whatever you want to wear, you wear. Whatever you want to grow, you grow. So this is an interesting one, mate. It's a good question here. Starting to see some I'm a Celeb speculation. Pete is going on holiday in two weeks' time. Is this your year, Pete? So. He hasn't said how long he's going on holiday for, by the way. And when he goes on holiday is exactly when I'm a Celeb starts. There is a point to why this is a question.

34:00Yeah. This time last year, I made an announcement to you. Yeah. There is a reason behind this whole thing. I told you that I wouldn't be here after thingy because people already know. No, you're not. No, I'm not. Pete, if that was your reveal, I would have slapped you. I mean, it's pretty much exactly what we did for Strictly. No, but I needed more than that. I needed more. I needed you coming in with, like, jungle-themed stuff. I would have gone mental. It was a pot plant. I would have gone mental. No. Well, listen, I can't confirm or deny, but, you know, you never know. Never bloody know. You never know.

34:47Will I be in the jungle? Will I not be in the jungle? You never know. Imagine if Pete hasn't told us, and he goes on holiday, and he just like appears on TV and we're like, what the fuck? No, listen, the jungle is Sam's thing. It's not my thing. The jungle's been there for years. No, no, no. But like you won the jungle. Like, you know, we've done, we've done. Hey, the jungle would be, and I mean this in all seriousness, the jungle would be the best thing that you could, personally you, could ever do. By the way, so much better for you than Strictly. Which is mad because this time last year, the best thing I could have done was strictly.

35:28It was better than the jungle. Mate, the reason the jungle would be so great for you is you turn everything off, you go and sit around a campfire, hopefully with people you like. And that's where it all goes tumbling down. But if you do like them, mate, you do nothing all day. You just like, but mate, you just recalibrate. I think that there's a massive difference between you and I and that is a recalibration for you. to recalibrate on TV is great for you, not for me. I think our experiences will be very, very different. And I don't, I wouldn't enjoy it. I think you'd love it. I think you'd absolutely love it.

36:08And I think you'd win it. Well, I certainly wouldn't do that. Let's be fucking honest. I think you'd win it. I think, I genuinely think, well, at some point I think you're going to do it. And when you do, I will be on that fucking bridge, holding on, literally, I'll be in that family and friends tent just watching. If you don't give me an answer to the family and friends tent, by the way, I'll be fucking fuming. Well, I mean, you're alumni now, so you'd just be there anyway. I would. And I would be the guy coming into camp as well. And if you didn't fucking cry. But no, there's speculation every year about everyone doing it and all sorts of people, but I am not doing it.

36:43I know a few people are doing it. Who have you got? You own, they're like YouTubers and shit. Yeah. Thankfully, I'm not doing it this year then. although it will be a recalibration of myself sitting with YouTubers in Australia in the jungle doing nothing. Because we all know I love to do nothing with people who I don't know. One of my favourite things to do. You would love it. And when you eventually do it, I think you're going to come out and be like, that was the best thing I've ever done. I will almost guarantee it might be. I could almost guarantee it. Because weirdly enough, I do know myself slightly better than you know me.

37:20It's not my, well, factually, It's not my cup of tea, I will be honest with you. But I get why it is great for some people, but I couldn't live with people I don't know for three weeks and I wouldn't want to do that. I wouldn't want to recalibrate on TV. It's just not. But as an experience, though, I think it would be great, but I'm not doing it. And I have no plans to do it. Yet. Excellent. Well, the last question is probably the most thought-provoking that we have. Sneeze confetti or burp glitter? I'm going to have to look a bit for this one because I don't actually know what that means. I think it's a would you rather.

38:08Oh, right. Okay. Would you rather sneeze confetti or burp glitter? Fucking hell. What? Do you either sneeze confetti out of your nose or burp glitter out of your mouth?

38:27Excuse me, you can have found this in... Now, Pete, this is a really important question. Sorry. Now, really think about this. I think I might have just had a stroke. Just think about this. Sneeze confetti or burp glitter?

38:44Think about it every time you burp. well is this what I would rather for myself yeah you have to pick one because for you I would rather you sneeze confetti because you burp and blow so that would mean that you would you would just cover everything in glitter it would be a constant stream and you burp a lot very good a lot very good point um whereas rarely sneeze so less tidy up for me I what how am I

39:16I would rather sneeze confetti. Why? Why? Why is that? Because I have to pick one. No, but let's delve into why. Because I don't sneeze very often. I don't burp very often. But what I do know is that confetti is easier to tidy up than glitter because glitter gets everywhere. But think about all those strands coming out your nose holes. Well, they just come in. No, you go. You go, weee. No, who sneezes like that? I've never heard anyone sneeze and go, sorry, I'm just going to sneeze. Weee. You just go, and then it's just one hit and then you can just tie it up. No, because not just that. It comes out and goes, weee, and then goes back in.

39:54And then every time you... Okay, so what we're doing is just changing the question. So would you rather sneeze, weee, confetti, or how does the burp go now? And does the burp last for 15 minutes as well? No, the burp just... It comes out in a dust cloud. I don't know how much longer I can do this. Sneeze confetti, easier to tidy up just in general. If you're choosing to burp glitter, I think you have something wrong with you if you asked us this, but I think you have something wrong if you're choosing to burp glitter. We all know and we've all been around glitter enough to know that it gets everywhere.

40:29I mean, for weeks after you find it in your beard and your hair and on bits of clothes and constantly doing that, especially at the rate you burp, you would just be a big glittery mess all the time. Whereas confetti, as we know it happens, it's very easy to tidy up. It's just get Henry out, give it a little fucking hoover up, job done. Glitter, it stays with you for a long time. I have a question on the back of that. Oh, thank God. Would you rather be a piece of string or, as we discussed before, a brick?

41:08would you rather be a piece of string or a brick? So you, you literally had your piece of string, but you had all of your thoughts and you were you, but you couldn't speak because you're just lying there like a piece of string. Right. Would you rather be that or sitting there like, like a brick? Again, you can't speak. because he obviously doesn't have a mouth. In that pose that you're doing there, would you rather be a piece of string or a brick? I mean, you know, what sort of string? It's about that long. So about 30 centimetres of length of string and some string that comes from a ball of string.

41:55So in terms of thickness... Quite thin. Quite thin. So in which case brick. Why would you have to be a brick? Why would you have to be a brick? Well, it's just fundamentally there are more uses to that. I don't know exactly how useful a 10 centimetre long piece of string is. Whereas if I am going to have thoughts and feelings about what I'm doing with my life as a brick. Yeah, put through a window. I can't express them, but I can build things. I can be used for murderous intentions. Throwing a peatwicks brick through a window. You know what I mean? And yeah, imagine throwing me as a brick through a window.

42:34I'm unable to say why I've been throwing through, but I'm just looking at you thinking, yeah, I'm in your house now. Yeah, and you're just sat there as a brick. So I imagine, again, you know, did I choose brick last time? No, we actually just thought, this is why it was kind of a... Because we've done this before, so I chose brick last time. So this is now, it's two nil for the brick. Two nil for the brick. You know, we're struggling to find things I would rather be than a brick. A worm? I think that was the one last time. Oh, was it? Yeah. I've got my memories so I can tell. So we've gone, so brick or worm, rather be a brick.

43:08Brick or string, rather be a brick. I don't know, but make sure, because this seems to be a new narrative for Stan Relevant. What would Pete rather be than a brick? If you want to send in suggestions, I can explain my logical reasonings for wanting to be a non-vocal mute brick with the same thoughts and feelings that I currently have. but so far brick is king and on that bombshell thank you so much for listening staying right on the bonus episode what would you rather brick or string I'd rather be a piece of string 10 so many years long why or no a worm actually I'd like to be a worm so it's now brick string or worm yeah worm for me why well because I can actually move you're a piece of string or a brick you just can't you just wear someone's place to you at least with a worm I can bury bury myself into the soil.

44:28Still waiting in line? Again? That's time you'll never get back. Save time and money with Stamps.com. Over 4 million businesses have skipped the line with Stamps.com. Join them to save up to 90 % off carrier rates from your computer or phone right now. Print postage for certified mail, registered mail, and packages in seconds. Then schedule a pickup right from your home or office. For a limited time, go to stamps.com and use code podcast for a free welcome gift. Taxes and fees apply. Hello, I'm Monica Reinagle, host of the Nutrition Diva podcast. Summer is here and with it, the hot and sticky weather.

45:05A morning working in the garden or maybe on the golf course can leave you more depleted than you realize. And plain water isn't always the most efficient way to restore the balance. That's where liquid IV comes in. Its science-backed formula is clinically proven to hydrate faster than water alone. Whether you're exercising, playing outside, or simply surviving a summer heat wave, it's an easy way to stay hydrated. Shop now at liquidiv.com. Liquid IV, hydration that goes wherever life takes you. Thumbtack presents Tile Trouble. Every single time I use my sink, I make eye contact with the uneven grout on my kitchen backsplash.

45:42The crooked corners eye me and I'm haunted by more tiling questions than I thought possible. What kind of pro can fix a backsplash? Can I replace one cracked tile or should I replace them all? What? What if I just use Thumbtack? I can hire top-rated pros, read reviews, and compare prices with a tap. All on the app. Thumbtack knows homes. Download the app today. While every other channel is fighting for your customer's attention, podcasts are where they've already given it. No one accidentally listens to a podcast for 45 minutes. They choose to be here. They trust the voice in their ears. and when that voice talks about your brand, it doesn't sound like advertising.

46:19It sounds like a recommendation from a friend. Acast gives you that trust at scale. Digital precision, post-read authenticity, and performance data that proves it worked. Don't fight for attention. Buy it with Acast. Learn more by visiting acast.com slash advertise.

46:40Hello, Relevanters. we wanted to let you know that you can hear exclusive bonus episodes of Staying Relevant every month on Amazon Music. We are going to be playing Snog, Marry, Avoid, one of our favourite games, all with fictional characters. So prepare yourself for Sam to snog Woody from Toy Story and for me to marry Pocahontas. And possibly the genie from Aladdin. We don't know yet. We were sort of like undecided on that one. That's an avoid for me, that one, genie. I don't know. I quite like it. Listen to monthly bonus episodes exclusively on Amazon Music and enjoy ad-free listening on Amazon Music for all episodes of Staying Relevant with your Prime membership.