Pete FAILED a test??

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1:38So, do it. Do it. Welcome to Staying Roundup, the podcast hosted by two bestest of best buds, me, Sam Thompson and Peter, James, Jonathan, and Jason works. Yeah. This episode will contain swearing. If you don't like it, go f*** yourself. And this is the bonus episode, which means it's Thursday, so you'll be able to watch this on Josh's YouTube channel on a Sunday. And then Monday's main episode that came out audibly, you can now watch on Josh's YouTube channel as of last night, which is Wednesday, which means that you can catch us on a... Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Sunday. God, it's like you're held hostage every time that happens, and I love it.

2:18Make sure you rate, review, do all of that crap. Follow us on socials at Staying Room Podcast. You know the fucking score by now, you bunch of... We have a bit of housekeeping at the start of this episode, and it's a big one. For dog's sake, season two is out now, everybody. Yes, it is. All episodes available to stream on you. The first episode aired on Monday on U and W at 9 p.m. Obviously, we're recording this before its release. And Pete, I spoke to him outside. You're a little bit nervous for the world to see this, aren't you? Petrified. Why is that? it's that tricky second season you know what I mean those tricky seconders the tricky second season obviously the first one you know did very well surprisingly so there's a lot of pressure on the second season and I've got a slightly different role as well which means that if people don't like it I will be to blame so yeah I am a little bit nervous about it well by the time this comes out I'm sure that you will be aware of how much people loved it.

3:26So please do go and watch it. Can you catch up or do you have to record it? All episodes are available to stream on you. And then each new episode, if you want to watch it on UNW, comes out every Monday at 9pm thereafter. And this is series two. And then there is also a Christmas special, which I was watching this morning as part of the edits or going through that, which will be coming out near Christmas. And then series three has also been recorded. so there is going to be a lot of dogs and a lot of me coming up over the next few months so fucking strap in yeah a lot of dogs and a lot of Pete could be doing worse out there I would also just like to point out because whilst we are just plugging my shit it has its own home now it has its own social media channel which is Pete Wicks for Dog's Sake please follow it you can get all the behind the scenes we can catch up with different dogs and doing all sorts of stuff on there so it's now got a little social home Merci beaucoup that's French

4:26you can now carry on what's the monday meeting well yeah i mean i got to be honest with you at this point i i would really like just to abuse you for this but i also didn't attend the monday meeting but what i will say is i i remembered and i was excited about the fact that i knew you'd forget it but i forgot that i said i'd be there until I read this script, actually. So I still hadn't realised, and I actually took the piss and went, of course he wasn't at the Monday meeting yesterday, and then forgot that I'd also said that I would be there. I actually feel so much better. Yeah, so I wasn't there.

5:02However, you, I mean, I just completely forgot. You remembered two hours later and asked to redo the Monday meeting. Yeah, no, it was a tough one, that one. I actually had a day off as well. I didn't have a day off, but I was going to try and be part of it. But Sam, full day off. What did you do with your day off?

5:26It's just a bit of admin. Just relax quite a bit, to be fair. Yeah. Code for nothing. I woke up and I called Pippa at about midday. And I was like, Pippa, how the hell did they go? You woke up and called Pippa at midday? No, I said I woke up. I don't know why I said I woke up. fucking no I got up I went to the gym in the morning right okay so I went to the gym in the morning had like a really relaxed like sort of morning time good good you need to take some time for yourself dude but you know we never really have much time so I was like okay I'm going to enjoy this time and then I called I got bored at around midday and I was like I don't really know what I'm going to do I'd already been around Louise's and fucked her off and I was like I don't know what I'm going to do so I called up Pippa and I was like what's up like what can I do what's up bitch do you want me to come into the office and she went well you know you could have come in earlier for the 10 o 'clock meeting that you said you were going to do on the last episode and um and it made me feel really really bad about myself actually I then went can I come in now and again I was hit with no um no reason why either again just no I'd just like to point out that there is um you know as you all know Sam loves to tell you all we're bosses now um however Sam is not allowed to come into his own office and today he was 15 minutes late and he called Pippa to apologise to Pippa for being late.

6:47I'm so sorry I'm going to be late. I didn't do that. I just explained there was traffic because I just wanted people to know that I was trying to be on time. Well I'll tell you something I unfortunately next Monday is the TX of for dog's sake so I'm going to be on radio then this morning and doing all sorts of stuff so I'm not going to be available for the Monday meeting. Well well well. so third time lucky shall we try again we are just about to celebrate the first year of staying relevant and this will be sam's first monday meeting so are you are you can you take the reins i could take the reins um you know i i feel like you know we sort of sped into this actually without giving much background if you don't know what's happened is that last week i actually said that i was going to take charge of the monday meeting um and obviously lead it as you've just heard we uh we we i didn't turn up so so i promise i want to make a vow right now next monday josh i will fucking be there with bells on i'm gonna have a slide the one that was most disappointed josh was josh digital josh uh decided very kindly he was like called up people went shall i park in the uh in the in a pure gym car parking space so sam can get in on time to which then people went oh I'm sure he won't turn up where were you parked today?

8:06in 86 in 85 okay alright we cannot wait for the next complaints to come rolling in and also just for the record when we do it and again for a little bit of context Sam keeps parking in a parking space that isn't ours we've actually had complaints about the fact that he's parking in someone else's parking space the parking space in question is number 86 what Sam has done despite the complaint is gone fuck it I'll do it anyway double down baby because what he thinks is going to happen is when someone turns up at the door and knocks on the door and says get the fuck out of my space he thinks I'm going to handle it but what isn't going to happen is me handling it so we're all going to watch Sam and I can't wait for this we should set up a little camera just for when Sam has to have the conversation about why he feels like he is the authority and the give a fuck to park where he wants gotta double down yeah you double down they've got to make them realise it's my territory now that parking space is mine I'm going to pee on it I'm going to pee on it.

9:02It's going to be my territory there. So we're going to have two spaces. I'm not just going to pee on it. I'm pretty sure there are cameras. But anyway, next Monday. Because that would be the problem with peeing on it. It's getting caught. Next Monday, I will be there at the fucking staff meeting. We're going to have PowerPoint presentations and everything. And who's going to be delivering those? Because you haven't switched your laptop on in fucking five years. Yeah, I don't even know if it works, actually, to be fair. I do Zooms on my phone. What is your staying relevant email address? Oh, fuck, I do know this.

9:34So you're going to try and catch me out here, but I've got it. Monday meeting, he said it now, he will be there. I would like an update afterwards, Pippa, if you could, on how it went. I would like the minutes, everything that Sam has led you all through. Because we have a lot of exciting stuff coming up over the next few weeks. There's a book, there's a special announcement that's going to be happening about something that we're doing as a team. We've got loads of shit happening. So there's a lot to get through on the Monday meeting next week, isn't there? be prepared everyone though because I don't take any prisoners when we do this no I'm going to come in pretty heavy handed on all of you as Sam said he doesn't take any prisoners when he does this which he's never done yeah I feel like I'm not going to be taking any prisoners but he assumes he's not going to take any prisoners alright so be careful yeah can't wait this is what I've always dreamed of being a boss it's like sitting there just being like so what it's amazing isn't it what you've always dreamed of but you could have done it on any of the Mondays for the past year but we've waited until specifically next Monday the 13th of October because it was the dream and he always knew on Monday the 13th of October 2025 his dreams would come true.

10:41I begged Pippa to redo the meeting. She went, well, there's no point doing that now. We've literally just gone through it. I wanted to come in and redo the entire thing. Well, look, Monday meeting, that's set. Now I've got some other things, some exciting things because we've got some new pods to shout out. We have got, Sam, our very own fan podcast. No, we fucking don't. So it's a big shout out to the Relevanters the morning after. It's hosted by Tash, Louise and Kian. They record after every... Kian. They record after every main episode we put out and they basically discuss staying relevant.

11:20So listen, it's a new production. They do it themselves. The first episode came out. There was some sort of sound issues. So it's unfortunate for that. but it is their first time and there was only two out of the three. I love the way Pete's just gone in with the straight problem. They couldn't hear it very well. The critique instantly. Slightly muffled and they may have lost some of their content along the way. But what I will say is fucking keep plugging away. We all have to start somewhere. I'd also like to point out it's hosted by three of them but only two on the first ever episode because one of them was ill.

11:50So, but we love you. Big up. Listen, we're all about promoting new talent on this show. so all of you, the relevant us, if that's what you're going to call yourselves, you should go and listen to that podcast in all seriousness. So it's called Relevant Us The Morning After. You can get it on Spotify, and it's like a nice little forum. I don't know what the kind of how they're going to be doing it and all the rest of it, but we see you, we hear you. So, and by the way, Pete doesn't even listen to our podcast, so the fact that he's listened to yours is fucking phenomenal. So well done for that. But that's not the only new podcast.

12:26Again, like I said, we like to promote new talent. because there is another new pod on the horizon. Again, they're starting from sort of nowhere, don't really necessarily know what they're doing. And, you know, but we like to promote new people in podcasts. So, Sam, it was great to see you helping out on You About. Again, it's a new pod. Bear with them because they, you know, they're not really where they should be, but they're trying. But thankfully, they got in the big guns. Sam how was it doing a podcast with your nemesis although they have used that joke themselves to promote their own podcast but how was it?

13:07Mate as you said essentially it was just me sort of doing a guest role Tom Grennan obviously is on tour I think he's in Australia at the moment Singapore he was in and so he asked me whether I'd go and stand in and play his role in You About the podcast with Roman Kem and it was the poor fucker I literally turned up. It was the one time I'd just been to the football the night before. We recorded it on a Sunday. And my voice completely fucking gone. So I literally could barely talk. But it was fun. I mean, Roman's a lovely guy. In all seriousness, Roman is very good. We spoke about the pyramids.

13:43Well, not only that. I mean, you came up with some really brand new topics that haven't been discussed on podcasts before. And I don't know where they would have got the ideas from. But you discussed your potential future children. Not daughters, sons, obviously. You know, fucking where'd you get these ideas from? It's fucking crazy, isn't it? So that was nice. Sam is going to have a son called Kit. Let's hope that takes off. We have a real problem with that, actually, by the way, because that's the name that Pippa wants to call her son. Well, yeah. And I actually got an angry phone call from our producer being like, why are you telling everyone you're going to call your son Kit?

14:22I told you that name. It's my name. You're not allowed to do it. She was actually being serious. So basically, it's the race to who has kids first. But, yeah, no, it was nice of you to go and do that. It was good. They asked her, this is fun, the You About team asked Pete to send in a voice note, you know, to sort of add into the pod. Pete blind refused. I did learn something really interesting from Roman, actually. And wrap your head around this. So, come on, wrap your head around this, guys. Just take a minute, sit down, try and wrap your heads around this. Mate, listen to this one, listen to this.

14:56So our bodies, right, our bodies... Yeah, yeah, guys, strap in. They're essentially controlled. Everything you do is controlled by your brain. Yeah. Wasn't that just crazy? Sam, I'm going to be honest with you, I've done something nice for you today. I never know if this is a good thing or a bad thing. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What have you done that I would actually genuinely really quite like? Got yourself a cat. No. No, I haven't. I've done something specifically nice for you. Oh, my God. Oh, I can't think. Are we going to hug? I love a hug. So I've done something nice. What I'm going to do is hug you.

15:36Is that what you think? That's all I need. No, no, no. That's all I've only... All right, I'll give you more of a clue. I've done something really, really nice for you, but also for Vegas. So you've bought me something on your Avias collecting credit card then? I have said. I have been online shopping for you. Oh, my God. Yay. We always said we were going to do that together. Yeah, I've done a shopping haul on ASOS, Selfridges, Rees. Yeah, I've really gone for it. You said I was going to be there. Mate, you said I was going to be there and I wasn't there for that. Well, I just think because you've been on your style journey and you glow up, I'm just going to kind of add to that.

16:04So I've done a bit of a kind of a styling haul. And I've collected even more Avios by shopping via the Avios app. It's just one extra step where they track your spending and reward you with Avios. Some retailers give you 10 Avios per pound you spend. So I've spent big. Really? You're normally quite stingy.

16:25I have spent big And I've done it for you Out of the kindness of my own heart And to help us to get to Vegas Oh Peter Because you want us to go Don't you? Yeah yeah I do And I don't want to go to Vegas With you dressed like that But mate that's really sweet I'm very very grateful Listen I've just It's not specifically for you It's for us It's for Vegas So you've bought yourself clothes as well? I might have seen a few things Oh let's have a Oh we're going to do a try on But this is specifically for you We could do a little catwalk trial. Oh, my God. Fashion show. Slay queens. Right. Okay. If we start, do you want to go and get yourself ready and we can do like a little trial?

17:00The first one is sort of like it's day to day. Just sort of casual day to day in Vegas. Just we're out around the street. Just chilling. We just do what we do. Go and get yourself dressed and I'll talk you through it. Okay, cool. Right. Trousers are from Reese. I can tell from here. A taper fit. I look so fresh and so clean. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's a dressed up day today. Oh, I've got to put my zipper up. Casual but smart. Yeah. I think you look great. What have we got next? Well, next up, we have to get to Vegas. Yeah. Plane outfit. That's a very good point. I like cosies. Did you get me cosies?

17:32Listen, listen, listen. Just go on. Go on, get ready for your plane outfit. Oh! I mean, it is going to be sort of about 35 degrees in Vegas. Yeah, but the flight sometimes gets a bit cold. Which is why you've got the sort of classic white tee and a Birkenstock. Because when we get to Vegas, you can just take the jumper off, tight around your waist and you just look effortlessly cool at the airport. You know, I've kind of gone for the kind of 90s celeb flying through the airport look. You can whack it over your shoulder. And then another outfit, which is my personal favourite, because I thought, listen, what I've done there is kind of style you a little bit how I think you should dress.

18:02But I've done something that I think is more Sam appropriate. This is for the pool, because we'll be doing a pool party. You're just rocking in and I really want some, I want to wear you, I want you to wear this with confidence. I look, I don't even want to say it. Do you want people to go, Sam Thompson is here. He's large and in charge and he's in Vegas. Large and in charge sounds exactly, I feel like I'm in Benidorm. I like it. Nah, brother, you can't do this to me. Listen, it's the three stripes, man. They're from Office, mate. I collected Avios for this. I can't do this. Look how great you look.

18:30Look at me. No, I think you look great. I know you're kind of a big deal in the UK, but in Vegas, no one knows Sam Thompson. They don't know you won the jungle, but they are going to know you're there. All right, that was the idea behind it. So what do you think? If you want me to wear this, I'll wear it. For you, I'll do it. Well, yeah, this is also, this is just sort of a little joke saying you'll be okay. I can't tell whether you're mugging me off or not. The first two I really like, but this is going to be a struggle. Me round the pool. You won't even want to be seen with me round the pool in this.

18:57I just thought I'd do something for you. That was just so lovely of you, man. I really, I really, I really appreciate this. So 10 % of it was for you. What was the other 90? I want to go to Vegas. Yeah, I want to go to Vegas too, man. Yeah, I really want to get to Vegas. It's for the Vegas challenge because I don't think we've been making as much progress as we were doing really, really well. But people have been slacking. I'm going to be honest with you. You've been slacking. Okay. But are you saying we might not go to Vegas? I'm just saying it's touch and go at the minute. We need to buck ideas up here, guys.

19:31Okay. Production team, looking at all of you. Wow. You're actually taking this seriously. Yeah, of course I am. Yeah. No, I like it. I like it. Listeners, if you also want your everyday to pay for your holiday, then you can start collecting today by searching Avios. Season C's to apply, please, for the love of God, we cannot not go to Vegas. We have to... I have been waiting my entire year for this. But also fairly obvious. No, but like... Is it like... Sorry, is this thing you discussed on the pod? It's groundbreaking, this pod. Honestly, if you just want to learn a little bit more, like some of these mad fucking theories of your brain, right?

20:11You know this thing? I don't think I've explained it properly. No, no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait. Your brain, and this is, listen, thank God for you about, because otherwise I wouldn't have known this. Your brain, it controls your body. It comes from there. I actually think about it. That round thing in there, it all comes from there. Think about it, your body is just in essence a vessel for an alien object in your head. I can't get my head around that. my mind is blown and that's my mind telling me that because it's controlling look so wait hold on it's my brain doing that yeah it is it is everything in your body is controlled by one thing anyway moving on I learned something else actually as well oh did you yeah the Mandela effect yeah so people thought that Nelson Mandela died in jail but he didn't no he didn't basically people think what the Mandela effect is is that people think that what's happened is, I can't remember fully what it was.

21:09Is that your brain not controlling things? No, no. Basically, is that some people are actually from a parallel universe stuck in our time. Yeah. Yeah. So, you heard it here first. Nelson Mandela's not dead. Okay. He's in a parallel universe. Yeah, this is it. Okay. Okay. Do you know what I've got? A perfect example. Your piece. Okay, so. Your brain's doing that. In Snow White, what does the wicked lady, the queen, say to the mirror? Nelson's alive. No, what does she actually say? I don't know. You must know fucking Snow White. Not personally. Who's the fairest in the wall? Who's what? Fairest in the wall.

21:54You know she looks into the mirror? Grumpy. What does she say? Mirror, mirror on the wall. No. Who's the fairest of them all? It's not that. but we all think it's that but it's not that what is it? is it just who's the fairest of them all? I can't remember I'll have to tune in to find out but it's crazy because we all think certain things are the way they are but they're actually not no I mean it's amazing isn't it? fuck I've literally caught the you about but I'm now like spreading it in do me a favour leave that sort of shite for that podcast because over here in reality we'll just crack on the way we are, shall we?

22:33When Roman told me it sounded, I was like, I get what you're saying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I liked it. Well, listen, good, good. Didn't hold a candle to you though, Peter. Oh, no, listen, Roma is a better presenter than I am. Well, no, back onto this pod though, because something really, really big to update you on. Obviously, it's time for our weekly football check-in. Yep. Obviously, our sponsored football team, Great Bar United, are, they've had a mixed start to the season. Obviously, first game was a 6-0 loss. Second game was a 3-2 draw. Then it was a 3-2 loss. Fuck me, it was a 3-2 loss.

23:13But don't worry, we brought it back. A 1-2 draw. So great by United. No wins as of yet. Two losses and two draws, Peter. How are you feeling that money's been well spent? Yeah, I mean, it's good. You are obviously struggling with just reading because it's two losses and three draws. Fuck. But that equals five. No, there's four. There's four here. Oh, didn't see the bottom one. Yeah. So on the fifth game, so they're on three points. Why am I seeing four games? Because there's four listed there, but it's not a loss this week, but another draw, another one all. Oh, it's another one all. Yeah, I believe that's where we're at.

23:48Is that right, Pippa? Yeah. Okay, right. So three points after five games. It's all looking good. I mean, let's just, if you could just, you know how you use your brain to control things? If you could just get your brain into Sam T. footy mode. Right. Because I think at this point, this is when they really need a little bit of advice because things aren't going well for them. I'll be human. So if you could just look at the camera, direct this at Great Bar United, what do you think is happening? Lads, I've got to be honest with you. Sorry. Lads, I've got to be honest with you. This isn't, it's not your finest start to any sort of season.

24:26And we're, you know, we put you out of the O2. We've brought a lot of people to the cause to the point where rival teams are now asking us to hit them up. And you're letting us down. There's not much else that can be said really other than sort of this pure disappointment of, you know, begged, borrowed and stolen from the bank account of Pete Wicks to fund your pitch fees and also the fund of shirt sponsor. it's not good enough and we will be looking at, well, the other Mavericks, what are they called? Who are the other team? Just fucking get better, you fucking losers. You know what I mean? Don't worry about what else he's doing.

25:02Worry about what you're doing. Because you're currently, you're embarrassing me. It's fucking embarrassing. I'm in the BBC News supporting you, right? BBC News as if I put money into you and you can't even win a fucking game. 15 ,000 people at the O2 were chanting your fucking name as if that's not motivation enough for a Sunday League football team and you can't even win a fucking game. Oh, because we haven't got ex-pro footballers. Just get better. Train harder. The fuck is wrong with you? That is one of the best team talks I think I've ever heard. So, look, lads, we love you to bits. You know, we're not going anywhere, but, you know, as Pete did say, this is...

25:42The love is dwindling. That's all I'm saying. All right. And listen, much like when, you know, a team starts off and we've seen it multiple times in kind of football, especially in football, sometimes something's got to give. Yeah. You know, and at the end of the day, we haven't started well. This is a sort of a collaborative effort between Great Bar United and staying relevant. So it may look at some serious changes being made. And by that, I mean withdrawal of cash. Withdrawal of funds. Although there is nothing more staying relevant than a football team that can't buy a win. Um, so yeah, either way, we're proud of you.

26:19But it will get to the point where I will buy a win.

26:25Now you know what kind of dad Pete's going to be. Olive can't get into school, have a backhander. And a reach around. Anyway, on to emails. Obviously, this is the bonus episode. It's a lot to do with you. So if you want to get in contact with us, then email the worst email address in the world. which is hello at srproductions.co.uk. So after all the housekeeping, we've got a very important email from Ben. Guys, have you seen the news? That always worries me. I hope Sam is feeling okay thinking of you at this hard time. In case you don't know what I'm talking about, Maya has announced she's not doing our Halloween party this year.

27:14so you're not worried about hosting the whole family for the holidays why would i be wayfair had everything i needed to get the house holiday ready what if mike brings his cheerful dogs my tree has tons of five-star reviews telling me how sturdy it is but what if everyone's plus one brings a plus one we'll see how extendable this extendable table really is and extra chairs are on the way okay what if there's a blizzard and everyone has to sleep over ready to go with extra bedding and towels. From guest-ready essentials to holiday decor you can trust, Wayfair delivers. Los Deportes bring families together.

27:47Maybe it's watching el partido or cheering from the stands. While you are taking care of everyone else, don't forget to take care of yourself. If you are 45 or older and at average risk, it's time to screen for colon cancer. ColorWard Plus is non-invasive, requires no prep, and can be used at home in about 15 minutes. Habla con tu médico or request Color World Plus test online. Hablemos de lo que nos hablan. Available by prescription only. Hi, I'm Nick, co-host of The Best One Yet. You optimize your workouts, your portfolios, and that rando startup idea that hit you in the middle of the shower.

28:18But if you're not hydrated, you're already playing catch-up. So we keep a stash of liquid IV in our studio. One stick mixed into 16 ounces of water is clinically demonstrated to hydrate faster than water alone with three times the electrolytes of the leading sports drink, plus eight vitamins and nutrients. Whether you're traveling, exercising, or podcasting, the best business news ever. Liquid IV makes it easy to stay hydrated wherever life takes you. So shop now at liquidiv.com. Liquid IV hydration that goes wherever life takes you.

28:50I didn't know that. That's why I didn't get the invite. She's not doing it. So all that's happened there is we've made Sam feel better about himself. Wow. Wow. That is, I never got to go to one. never got to go to one you just missed out on the chance did she write that on her social she must have she must have written that on social there isn't a part of me that cares god I'm gutted about that well yeah but listen I'm going to be honest with you I planned something for Halloween for you it's because you knew I wasn't going to be going there didn't you there's been a lot of talk of Halloween in the SR office we can't fully announce why but let's just say something about it let's just let's just say halloween i'm dressing up this year is gonna go off like you've never seen it go off before mummies zombies little bo peep strippers it's gonna be fucking vampires gonna be phenomenal we're doing a staying relevant thing.

29:57Yeah, and awkwardly there is eight people in the stand by the office. Only four of us are going to enjoy it. The other four enjoy trick-or-treating. Right, question time. Da-da-da question time. Would you one more question about my Halloween party. Would you ever throw a staying relevant Halloween party? I'd rather not. But quite fun? No. Why? Don't want to. But why not? I don't really like Halloween and I don't really like parties. You love a party? What are you talking about? Not when it's forced fun. Oh, it'd be amazing. It'd be so good. I think we should step in and actually be like, Maya, don't worry, we've got this one.

30:36Really? Yeah. Yeah. It's amazing though because she wouldn't come to yours. I think she would. I don't think she would. I think we should ask her. I don't think. I think we should send her a message now and be like, Maya, if I were to the Halloween party, would you turn up? Well, you've spent three years trying to get her on the pod, Sam. Yeah, but that's just sort of time hasn't allowed. Time hasn't allowed. I mean, what would you do if she actually did end up on the pod? Do you think you'd be able to control yourself? Of course I would, mate. We're friends. And what about you and Maya? Mate, we're best buds.

31:06Best buds? We're best buds. All right, you heard it here first. So Sam and his best bud, Maya, after three years, still trying to get her on the pod, still nothing. Nearly. We're going to get there. We will get there. No problem. Unusual best bud relationship, that one, I'm going to be honest with you. She's been out of the game. Do you know what I mean? She's living life. She's been out of the game. Yeah, I don't know where she is, but she's flying around places. Oh, she's best bud. I haven't called her in a while, to be fair. Oh. Not since she blocked your number. Anyway, question time. We're going to move on to some questions that you guys have sent us via the question box, which goes up on the socials every single week at Staying Redmond Podcast.

31:45um okay sam uh you have a new car yeah um you park it in the wrong spaces yeah uh you've already clipped all the wheels on it and scratched the door you've had it for three weeks um you so far have only driven it around fulham yeah um but uh people want to know who we think is the better driver out of you and i oh pete he's a far better driver not even not even worth having a conversation about that i i'm a i'm a terrible terrible driver and even worse parker um i like to drive i just i'm just not very good at it i i to be honest with you i mean i think we told the story before but i've you know there was a time in stanford airport where i actually had to get me and pete both drove to stanford airport and i made him get out of his car to park my car for me because i just couldn't i couldn't get the angles right when i was fucking trying to reverse in just wouldn't work out for me So yeah, Pete had to go in and then we had a little crowd watching us, watching us park.

32:40It's happened on two occasions, that. Yeah. The car parking. I've also had to try and guide him in to a parallel park somewhere along the King's Road. That also drew a crowd, funnily enough. But I think what people really want to know, and I don't think we've ever imagined, because I know people struggle to imagine me existing. But I think you can probably imagine me driving more than Sam. I can imagine Pete driving. Yeah. What I can't imagine is, but I've seen it, but I feel like everyone else needs to see it if you haven't been in a car with Sam, is the way you drive. So obviously for people watching this, if you could just show them your kind of steering wheel action and then explain it to the listeners.

33:23I can explain it. Your hands are at 10 and 2 at all times. How close to the steering wheel are you? Because I see you as a... No, no, I actually like to lean back. Lean back. Bit of a lean backer. Yeah. And I love a bit of music as well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What is the kind of go-to? Unwritten. I love it. The rest is still unwritten. Okay, just on... Mate, honestly, give me a little bit of that. Bit of Britney, Toxic. Just on repeat? Yeah, mate, that's my vibe. That's my jam. Christine Aguilera. Unwritten and Toxic. Yeah. I like the nostalgic noughties as I'm sort of driving along. It's nothing like listening to the nostalgic noughties as you clip your alloys and drive around...

34:03Toxic. as you're crunching your rims over the fucking curb. It's nothing like that. You know, as you're leaning back, one arm on the steering wheel, winder down. You know what I mean? You just sat there with your new tan out the side of the window, just a little orange arm poking out, your mullet blowing in the wind. The rest is still on me. As you do a 75-point turn down a cul-de-sac in Fulham. Um, nothing. Yeah, no, it's lovely. God, you visualise that so well. Everything about those things has happened. Um, I mean, I've been to Sam's house and the parking is suspect at the best of times. You have to hope for a space.

34:46Which is why, which is why the thought of Sam, because he seems, he drives to the office quite a lot now. It takes him 15 minutes when he gets home to park sometimes because he has to go round and round the block and then hope and then, oh, no, that space is not big enough. Despite the fact you could get a fucking jumbo jet in it. That is so true. So what Sam needs is a two space entry. So true. Two space entry. Because you just don't want to. But if you watch in Power of the Park, go.

35:16And then I'll get it wrong. I'll come in too steep. So I've got to come back out. And the worst is when you've got a fucking audience. And you've got a car who wanted to get in that space. And is watching you fuck it up. Knowing he's not even going to get in that space. Oh, it gives me. honestly I hate nothing more than parking in front of people it's so terrifying look you know we're saying this and we're taking the piss but we've never really put it to the test on who the better driver is yeah but I think it's pretty obvious well listen it's not been proven so at some point we may have to we may have to look at doing something what hit the track we've you know we may have to look at doing something I failed my driving test because I forgot to put my handbrake down and I tried to move off with my handbrake up and the guy literally I don't know if you've ever tried to do that.

36:01I imagine most of you haven't. When you try and drive off with a handbrake up, it makes a fucking horrible noise. It's like it goes, and like it lurches. And I literally couldn't understand what happened. And so I tried it three times, did every check under the fucking sun, was like, why is this happening? On the third time, I turned around to him and went, I don't know, I don't know. And he literally, the guy looked at me and went, and just put the fucking handbrake down. And I went, have I failed? and he went, I'm not going to tell you. And I knew I'd failed. I knew it was a major. So I literally went, mate, can I just drive back?

36:35And he let me drive back and finish the test. So did you pass second time? Yeah. So did I. What did you fail him? So in both of my driving tests, I got zero minors. Yeah. But on the first one, I had one major. What was that? I screamed at someone. Shut the fuck up. What did you say? At a zebra conchrist. I was 17 in a mini. And yeah, at zebra crossing, I was back to go, there was no one there, and then fucking some little fucking then just ran out of nowhere across the road. And I had to stand on the brakes halfway across it, and bit you out of nowhere. And I went, fuck, you. And then the guy went, let's go back to the center.

37:18I was about five minutes. So, and then the second one, I had no rub, but yeah, I failed on road rage. If there was ever going to be a man who would have failed on road rage, it would have been you. But no minors. No minors, which is great. and actually, Joe, I got loads of miners on my second one. You're going to love this. Very, very Sam Thompson. I got all of my miners for driving too slow. I didn't even realise you could do that to the point where the guy went. It was probably because the fucking handbrake was on. The guy, the geezer literally went, you know you can speed up. I went, I'm fine because I knew you can't get a major for it.

37:52You can only get, I mean, you can get a certain amount of miners that turns into a major but I went, I'm just going to drive to the speed. my instructor was going speed up and I was like nope what about your theory did you pass that first time no that was like seventh time what yeah really to the point where I used to not turn up to theory I used to book it it used to cost a bit of money as well theory I used to book it but then just not turn up oh I don't know when you passed but when I did theory test there wasn't hazard perception oh I had hazard perception yeah so there wasn't I had to do it for the motorbike yeah I had to do hazard perception but do you have to go to the centre and do it on the computer yeah Yeah, yeah, yeah.

38:28But yeah, no, motorbike I passed first time. Oh, God, man, I remember that so hard. Going in and like the maths, if you break at this speed, like how the fuck am I meant to know that? Just like, you just look with your eyes. And it asks you to do like the physics of it. I couldn't understand that. So then I just stopped turning up. Genuinely, my seventh attempt. Now, as you know, the steering wheel of the book is on the way. Yeah. All right, which is very, very exciting. Just recorded the audio book for that. We just finished the audio book. it's going to be at the start of November which is very important but you can pre-order now there's also going to be some other exciting things so you need to, we're on full book mode at the minute but we need to make Sam's other dreams come true which is Sam has always wanted to be an author and Sam would really love to make it into the Sunday Times bestsellers list so we need you to buy the book it's the last thing we're going to ask you for this month in terms of all your hard earned cash But yeah, so make sure you keep an eye out for that.

39:29But we've had a question in. Now that we have a staying relevant book on the way, would you ever do a staying relevant movie? Oh, yes, please. So there's the answer to that. But what I'm just going to add to that is if we did do a movie, who would you have play you? Oh, we're not playing ourselves? As non-actors, I imagine not. I think we play ourselves quite well. We tried it once in a sitcom. and I'll be honest with you, I'd... John West, you know? I'll be honest with you, I don't think we could have found anyone worse to play Sam than Sam. But who, in a movie, who would I want to have to play for me?

40:06Who would you want to play for you? I'd have Jonah Hill. Sorry, I know you're answering. Apologies, it just came to me. Go. Was that your brain just told you to? Yeah. It's amazing. Apologies. It controls everything. Jonah Hill. Jonah Hill. I love Jonah Hill. Right, but what, okay. Well, I'm sort of thinking Superbad kind of vibes. Which means you'd be McLovin. What? McLovin. You know what? McDonald's? No. You've never watched Superbad? No. Oh, my God. Maybe you're a bit old. Maybe it was a bit before your time, a bit after your time. In terms of, like, the teenage years. The, um... Oh, mate, it was unbelievable.

40:44It was so good. So you'd have Jonah Hill? Jonah Hill. That's not where I thought you were going to go with that. Yeah. I think he's such a great actor. Great comedy actor as well. I'd really like Jared Leto. Oh, I can see you as Jared Leto, actually. I think he's very, very cool. Jared Leto and Jonah Hill. I just think very, very cool. I mean, based on the fact that there's probably, because, I mean, really, if we're talking about, like, actors that I really like, I mean, someone like Joaquin Vittel, I know we've spoken about, but I do love him, isn't I? But he's not very Pete. Yeah, they've got to represent you.

41:14Yeah, which is why I'm confused by Jonah Hill for you. Well, he's just a bit of a klutz, you know, a bit fun. he doesn't look like you though there's not really much of a similarity I feel like personality wise he could probably fit into a Sam Thompson I think so yeah Jonah Hill for me because I just feel like you've got to know who you are I'm not fucking Brad Pitt I'll take a Jonah Hill at least you're realistic so let's just and just because they're in front of us producer Pippo who do you think could play her oh Pippo I think we're do you know what I'm going to say I'm going to give you an Anne Hathaway oh my god i can so see that and yeah what about digital josh oh the way you're looking at me yeah what the fuck is that guy the beady-eyed guy you talking about the one from armageddon he's on con air yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and he's in um armageddon as well what's his fucking name the guy he's in reservoir dogs yeah yeah well i've got to find him he's a little bit older now I know that guy.

42:17No, you're thinking... Who's the one that everyone says? You're that Rami Malek guy. No. You do look a lot like Rami Malek. Yeah, you could do a little Rami. Yeah, but the one you're Googling is fucking savage. Yeah, he's quite old. Steve Buscemi. Yeah, Steve Buscemi. Steve Buscemi. Steve Buscemi. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mate, bro, are you telling me that's not Josh? No, that is Josh. Are you telling me that's not Josh? No, no, no. Fucking fuck. Yeah, Steve Buscemi. So we've got Steve Buscemi, Anne Hathaway, Jonah Hill and Jared Leto. starring in a brand new film, Staying Relevant, the movie. Oh, that's such a good line-up.

42:50Watch out for it. That's a fucking good line-up. Anyway, and that's us done as well. From Staying Relevant, the bonus episode of two best friends, me, Sam Thompson, and Peter James Wicks. Now, to feature on this bad boy, email hello at srproductions.co.uk. And I've kind of lost where I am. Okay, make sure you rate reviews, all of that sort of stuff. Follow us on socials. It's sort of the same intro and intro we've done for the past three years. It is, it's similar. Yeah, it's sort of every year. It's the same. Every week, it's the same. It hasn't sort of changed or updated at all. Rate five stars, leave a review.

43:24Haven't read them for a while, actually. Nice, nice done. Actually, we haven't read the reviews. We should have a review episode where we pick out some of the best reviews because we haven't done that for a while. Because last time we did the reviews and the reason we stopped reading them was because they were all slagging off Pippa. So it wasn't the head? No, it wasn't about my round head, no. Thank you. Wasn't the voice, wasn't the head? No, not the arms. No, not the shine, not the short leg. The sweat, the sweating? On that note, come back next week. This has been a Staying Relevant production.

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46:03at BKFSEA.com. Hello, Relevanters. We wanted to let you know that you can hear exclusive bonus episodes of Staying Relevant every month on Amazon Music. We are going to be playing Snog, Marry, Avoid, one of our favourite games, all with fictional characters. So prepare yourself for Sam to snog Woody from Toy Story and for me to marry Pocahontas. And possibly the genie from Aladdin. We don't know yet. We were sort of like undecided on that one. That's an avoid for me, that one, Jeannie. I don't know. I quite like it. Listen to monthly bonus episodes exclusively on Amazon Music and enjoy ad-free listening on Amazon Music for all episodes of Staying Relevant with your Prime membership.