7 Ways to Crush Fear and Activate the Genius Within You | Ed Mylett

30:29And when that happens, okay, now you're in coherence, but there's another part that happens in this Einstein part of the brain. That's actually what the latest neuroscientists, psychologists are thinking is connected to this GPS part of our brain to the frequency of where all of the tools resources people are that resonate with that frequency so we've been evolving for what two and a half million years this homo erectus to now 108 billion humans on earth with a brain that's been changing and growing and my belief is we're just scratching the proverbial surface when we talk about you know a little quantum mechanics or quantum phase with entanglement how we're all connected we're all tuning into the frequencies that are us and within us and all around us now when we learn to use our brain better uh it's just mind-boggling how we can achieve goals and dreams that we thought were impossible to achieve before this is the fun part now that to me this is the fun part and by the way when you see two people that are vibrating at frequency like this you get an interview like what you're experiencing right now everybody like we both have done lots of interviews and we know when we're in the midst of a great one and everyone, I just want to be clear, please follow John, please.

31:47And if you're listening to the show or watching it, share my show. My gosh, people need to know this. You know, someone you care about or believe in or love that should be hearing these things. A couple more tips. And then I want to talk about something pretty serious at the end, if you don't mind, because you're just such a pleasure. But one of the ways that you could do some of this work, many of you know about vision boards and we can have a competent person talk about it. John, I can have you touch on that a little bit, but John goes even deeper into these accomplished boards. I think you call them and he's got a crap board, which I've never flipping heard of in my life.

32:19And again, guys, you're just not going to get this anywhere else. So could you just, these are strategies that are real, that work, that we both do. So there's two prolific entrepreneurs who are now in this space that are saying, these are the things we do. And isn't it ironic that we both do them and we're both addicted to them and we both attribute it to our success. So please talk about that, brother. So, um, I have my vision boards and I actually have my exceptional life blueprint that I've created. It's about 50 pages of my prayers, my rituals, uh, for my spiritual growth, health, wealth, my money story, my intermission, my outer mission, you know, some of the stuff, you know, either that I have or that I'm creating.

33:06And so I create these visual representations to trigger the biggest part of my brain called the occipital lobe and to activate my memory center. So I have vision boards for what I want to create. So I'm giving my brain the exact instructions so that not only it focuses helping me achieve that, what most people don't understand about vision boards or creating goals in writing that are specific is that your brain is a deletion and distortion tool as well. So if you give your brain the instruction of this is the stuff that's important to me for health, God, spirituality, charity, fun, experiences, my children, my mother, my father, myself, whatever it is, and you say, this is what I want to trade my life for.

33:53Delete and distort everything else. Now, all of a sudden, and you're using your brain as a deletion and distortion organism in order to be able to help you hyper-focus on what you want. So part one is get absolute clarity on what you want so your brain helps you eliminate what you don't want. Part one. Part two, right, part two is I tend to be a goal-seeking guy, right? And I used to not celebrate the small stuff. And I used to just like, you know, five, bigger goal, bigger goal, bigger goal, more, bigger, bigger. And somebody says to me, like, are you going to like slow down just to enjoy some of the stuff that you actually have done for yourself and for people in your family?

34:36And I was like, well, let me create an accomplished board. So good. So accomplished board. You passed that test on your own 40 years ago. Celebrate that. You helped this person who was challenged and celebrate that. You did this for him or for her or for yourself. Celebrate that stuff to remind yourself, I'm tough on myself. Come on, let's go. It's a goal. Let's go. And sometimes I forget the stuff that I have done, the stuff that I do do that I need to remember. So I created an accomplishments board and a list so I can just go to it when I feel like holy shit am I am I smart enough to achieve that next thing am I good enough what a lot of people don't know Ed is when I was a kid I used to feel like I wasn't smart enough and when I was a kid it helped me back and today I still feel like I'm not smart enough and that fuels me to get smarter so I use it like I set big goals like oh god I don't have the skills I don't have the knowledge but I can figure it out I've got contacts I've got friends and there's books, there's Google, there's, there's YouTube, there's holy mackerel.

35:51I don't need to have all the specialized knowledge anymore. So I have accomplished where we also, you know, crap board is what conflicts are, are happening right now. I often say that there's only four things that are holding you back as a human being, only four, there's not 25, there's four that are the core. One is if your vision and goal is bigger than your self-image. Okay? So if you feel you deserve it, you can have this vision and goal and be excited about it, motivated about it. You will not do what it takes to achieve. One. Two, if you have limiting beliefs. If you have a vision and goal, but you have a limiting belief that you're too young, too old, whatever the case is, your limiting beliefs will drive your behavior.

36:34Three, fear. Fear of being embarrassed to shame, ridiculed, or judge. Fear of failure. Fear of disappointment. and we'll talk about disappointment or fear of succeeding and failing again disappointment most and then the fourth one by the way is you're lacking the knowledge and skill required so that actually sets up a self-doubt trigger which activates the frankenstein brain which causes you to lose motivation but most people prefer to master disappointment and comfort zones instead of mastering change. Wow. So if I master disappointment, I know what I got. I just have to deal with, well, okay, this is what I got.

37:15And if I master my comfort zone, then at least this is the devil I know. Yes. Versus mastering change, and we know what's going on in our brain. We know what's happening neurologically, biologically, emotionally, physically, and all of that is a skill. it's just a skill so why not just master change why not become an adaptationist right now in the time that you need it the most in the world because if you don't then you're just going to keep repeating the same patterns that are going to get reinforced and it makes it harder in three months six months in six years so master change now and make that one of your core competencies and then you master your life.

38:03Oh my gosh. You guys, anybody familiar with my work know how much I love this man and how much we line up on these things similarly. I love the way that you phrase things. And guys, one thing about change, one of the reasons we hesitate to change as humans is it's an energy depletion too. Humans kind of want to conserve energy. You have to realize one thing, everybody. Then we're gonna go to one more part and then I'm gonna ask you about grief. But guys, we love to gravitate towards what we're most familiar with. we create these patterns in our life and we repeat them over and over and over again.

38:35And if you're not conscious of what they are, if you don't create new ones, you're just repeating the same life in a different year over and over. And that script that John talked about, your script is the same as it was five years ago, 10 years ago, 20 years ago, with slightly different characters and slightly different dressings in the room. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on to our next guest. Welcome back to the show, everybody. I'm so excited about today because the woman sitting across from me is the definition of brilliant.

39:10Oh, you're sweet. It's just true. And she is always the smartest person in the room and never feels the need to prove it to you. And that's the real definition of humility and brilliance combined. She's a cognitive neuroscientist and a true mental health expert. And her work's made a huge impact in my life. the last time she was on the show you guys went crazy because of how detailed her messaging is and her content is and so dr caroline leaf thank you for being here today oh ed thank you so much for that lovely introduction i'm very i'm very very flattered very honored thank you and i love talking to you it's always just you're an amazing interviewer thank you pull the best out of me well i love listening to you she also has a new book out that you can pre-order right now depending on when you listen to it but you can order it at any time but how to help your child clean up their Mental Mess, A Guide to Building Resilience and Managing Mental Health.

40:02You wrote this for how to help your child, but when I'm reading the work, I'm like, this just helps humans, right? That's what it's for. But so what is something, a strategy, you said awareness of the thought helps it lose its power over you. I'm using my description of it, right? So I've always said that, now I know why. Yes. Okay. What is something, a tactic or a strategy or a technique that somebody can use for their child or themselves that can help this in these 63 days that you would be proposing they do? Okay. So what you do is you do the five steps of the neuro cycle, because what I did was strategically look over the years at how can you actually find the signals and do this whole deconstruction, reconstruction thing.

40:41So you can't do it in one shot. So what you want to do is do a neuro cycle, which is five steps. And I'll go through those in a moment, but you're going to do five steps in the sequence. The first part of the sequence is the first more or less three weeks where you go through the five steps in around 45 15 to 45 minutes not more and not less then the second 42 days where you're stabilizing you just do it in five minutes so the five steps are basically gathering awareness and notice i say gathering okay so it's a very conscious and deliberate it's not like a mindfulness awareness which this is beyond that so when we talk about mindfulness meditation breathing decompression all of those are very important to prepare the brain so what you would do before you dive into the neuro cycle and you'll see this in my box and in my app i've got an app as well called the neuro cycle there's a two to three minute brain preparation which could be anything from focusing on momentum worry to doing a 7-3-10 breathing exercise so it's something to just get the neurophysiology under control then you or it could be a meditation a prayer whatever then you move into the actual work and I'm about to slip off this chair.

41:44Okay, go ahead. And you move into the, I get so into this, into the work of gather awareness, step one. So gathering awareness is a very specific process. Everything's very layered. Your mind-brain connection, psychoneurobiology, mind-brain-body, I'm actually a psychoneurobiologist to study that connection, is very ordered and sequenced and structured. And if you want something to change, you've got to follow the steps of the order. So the neuropsycho is a system in that you can put CBT techniques, you can put prayer, You can put whatever works for you, but put them in the right step. So when we gather awareness, we are gathering apples off a tree.

42:21We're not just randomly looking at things. You're very organized. Okay, what am I going to gather awareness of? My emotions. I'm feeling depressed. I'm feeling anxious. I'm feeling frustrated. Whatever. Just label them. Related to that emotion, what am I doing? What are my behaviors? What am I doing? What am I saying? How am I doing and saying them? So maybe it's depression and maybe it's withdrawal. Then the third thing is you're going to say, how do I feel in my body when I'm feeling depressed and withdrawing? Maybe cardiovascular issues, part palpitating. And then fourth category is how am I looking at life in this moment?

42:53As I feel depressed, gut ache and withdrawing, I feel that life sucks. Very simple example. Those are four signals. So step one is to gather those four. Step two is to ask why. You're going a little deeper. Why am I feeling these emotions? You're not solving the whole problem. Don't try and solve it in one day. Just go as much as you can handle. It's very draining. So that's why I say limit. So it's why am I having this? Maybe I'm having this depression. I seem to be having it because it's happening a lot. I'm not sure why, but it's happening five times a day. Or it's happening once a week. Oh, if it is once a week, am I having the same behaviors?

43:29Why am I doing that withdrawing? How often am I withdrawing? What other things am I doing? Why do I think I'm doing that? So you work through each of those signals and try and get some more. don't stay too long on those two steps and then you write now you don't journal you write you dump you literally dump what you've gathered awareness of and what you have reflected on because the first step was to gather awareness the second step was to do this reflection thing and then you dump it down on and literally in mind just write it all over the page i've developed a system called the meta cog and for kids it's the bubble cog and it's basically writing in a way that looks like a tree so it's starting from the middle and it's working around in circles and branches and colors and arrows and everything's connected everything's either on a line in a bubble if you don't like doing that just write any old way but try to write dimensionally don't do it in lines try and just put it all over the page because it brings in forces the two sides of the brain to work together creates a very strong connection between the conscious and the subconscious through the bridge of the subconscious yeah and it starts diving deep i mean it's like i I can tell you now that when I worked with patients that had symptoms of schizophrenia, this is an extreme example, but just to show you how well this works, we would have them just basically medicoge out what all these steps I'm going through.

44:45And they would have one whole personality on this side and they'd be continuing the same conversation in another whole. So you'd see the shift and then we could show them, hey, look what's going on. And from there we could unpack and find roots and things like that. So it's phenomenal in getting insight. Now you spoke about introspection earlier on. introspection insight it means diving into the depths of the non-conscious that's the most intelligent part of us writing part of step two or is that step three so writing is step three sorry gather awareness step one reflect step two writing step three you're bringing order out of chaos you're getting those three steps are taking deeper deeper deeper getting increasing your introspection insight pulling up things that are associated now that is things all over the page a lot of it won't make sense things may shock you that come out day one not really but as you progress through the days, more and more will come up.

45:32And for example, around day seven, people start saying, oh, I never saw this connection. Day 14, like insight into, oh, that's associated with that. I didn't see that. This is why I'm doing this. So there's tremendous growth. If you don't force it, you just go through the cycle. I want to interrupt you, but I want to ask you. Go ahead. Do you think during that awareness in the writing that you are uncovering some of the things that might trigger you as well? Totally. So it's step four. Excellent question. Step four is looking at what you've gathered awareness, reflected on, and written. You look, what are my triggers?

46:04What are the patterns? This has happened. What can I do? So step four is moving towards reconceptualization, reconstruction, healing, putting plant food on the roots to heal them. It's leading to that acceptance. You're not going to know why someone raped a child, why someone did this. That's their story. But that's your story. So you need to find out, I'm not crazy. I don't have a broken brain. I'm not genetically flawed. I don't have a mental illness. I'm showing up like this because of what happened to me. I can't answer why. I have to get to a certain level of acceptance, but at least I know why.

46:35It's not me, it's because of. And that helps you heal and move forward. So it's very progressive. It's not walking in circles round and around and around. You know, this is where you can bring in things like this, or psychodynamic theory and AC. There's a lot of different therapy techniques that people can bring in, experiences from EMDR and into all these, because this is a system. Yeah, into these spaces. What's the fifth step? The fifth step is an action, active reach. So you're going to, from the triggers and things like that, you want to move towards an antidote for today, an action for today.

47:06So what can I do today to keep me in a safe space? I've done the work for today. I'm not going to fall back into working on this anymore. I've got to get going through the day. And also your brain and mind need a rest. They get tired. So it's an action. It's like a visualization, a statement, a combination, a little prayer, an affirmation. So this is where you would fit an affirmation or a CBT-type technique. like maybe a little visualization exercise. So it's something that you do and say, maybe something as simple as, I can do this, I don't know how, and then visualize a rainbow. I mean, it could be something as simple as that to an actual little technique or it could be a breathing technique.

47:41So it's an action that keeps you going through the day, which helps you focus on the fact that you are moving towards healing. So you're removing energy from this thing because this process has brought this from the non-conscious to the conscious and it's weakened these branches. In the non-conscious, it's strong and driving. When the non-conscious and conscious are working together, then this is weakened. The protein branches, the chemicals, so I can start restructuring and reorganizing. I've got to tell you what I'm thinking when you're doing this because this applies to two different people.

48:11So everybody stay in here. So those are the five steps to sort of begin to rewire yourself or change your brain. The other part of me listening to this is if you're thinking, I really don't have a lot of these issues of anxiety or worry or depression, I also think that's the formula to create a change. Like if I had a goal and ambition, I'd become aware of what I wanted, right? Touching. I'd have all these reflections about it. I would then write about it. And I like the idea of it not being linear like a book, but actually all over the place. So that's almost like a dream personal vision board or dream board that you're doing.

48:44Then I'd think about what were the triggers I need to create to generate this state. It could be snapping my fingers. It could be seeing something. It could be walking into my office. It could be getting into my car. It could be a particular person. So I'd use that trigger to then create that state. And then obviously the fifth would be what's an action that I can take towards this step. You've got it. So that cycle can be used to uncover trauma, you know, reverse trauma, create brain health, but can also be a creative process in order to change your life. So you are brilliant because that's exactly where I started my research.

49:1538 years ago with people with traumatic brain injuries and learning disabilities and people that just wanted to improve their life. They just wanted, and it's called brain building. So it's the neuro cycle, and that was the first iteration of this thing was to develop brain building. So it was helping kids learn. So getting data in, as opposed to deconstructing, it was constructing. Sure. So it's taking from the knowledge in school to learn for an exam. Or what is the goal in your vision? So that's the brain building aspect of the neuro cycle. This is huge right here. I've got to tell you something because everyone always wants to create change.

49:43They're like, all right, do I get a vision board out? Like, do I? So this is a five-step process. It actually does it. To actually do it and to do it reinforced. And by the way, in 63 days, you're a different human being. Totally different. I do a thing. You're talking about visualization techniques. I should share this with you, and then maybe you can speak to why it might work. So everyone asks me, I don't visualize very well. Yes, you do. You just need to get quiet. And it's a muscle you build. You know, when you decide to start visualizing your life, it is difficult. But one thing I've done is I've created, I teach it to a lot of my athletes, is I use what I call like a highlight reel technique.

50:15So what I actually start with is I start, I've never said this on the show because it's part of my private work. but I want you to speak to it. I actually start by visualizing memories from my life that are highlights. So it could be, for example, you know, the birth of my son, the birth of my daughter, a home run I hit in baseball, an award I got, a sale that I closed that was important. These are things my brain are already familiar with, to your point earlier. It's already been wired. I've already repeated the emotion. It's already in there. And so I see those things and those are easy for me to recall because they're familiar and then i move to what i want so my brain i think begins to think they're one big highlight reel is there any data to prove that that's true meaning i'm already visualizing what i've already something i want i've seen an achievement i've seen an achievement and then i see the one that i want to achieve and for me my brain more easily sees the future when i start with things that i'm already familiar with in my past because I think we do that in reverse.

51:15So if we've had a traumatic, someone's hurt us in our life. We see this, we repeat it over and over, and then we then regenerate it in our real life with the next relationship. And that's why people end up dating the same person over and over again in a different body. Exactly. Right. Exactly. Okay. So I'm jumping out of my chair with excitement because you've said exactly the correct thing. Okay. So what you've just described, remember I said a moment ago, I spoke about how I'll recall this conversation because it's a great conversation and I'll build it. That's what we're talking about here.

51:43So you are recalling these. You're recalling those and you're using those to unmask your natural resilience. Yes, that's exactly right. So I actually call these insurance policies. Okay. So they literally, so when I work with a person to actually be able to build their brain, we're building an insurance policy. So you should be spending time on doing exactly that. So as you do that, you activate a whole different way that your energy flows across the two sides of your brain. You're going to the highest level of intelligence. You unmask resilience. you increase your wisdom, you tune into the depths of your non-conscious where pretty much your intelligence resides.

52:17Because your conscious is basically a workhorse and it's guided by your non-conscious. So what we've got to see is what is dominant in the non-conscious. Now your non-conscious is a gentle lady, gentle man, and it's basically always looking for the things that are blocking this growing and keeping you stuck in those. So it's on your side. But you have to tune in to what's coming up. So when you describe, when you want to do something difficult, you first think of something good. What you've done is you've listened to wisdom from your non-conscious, which is that process. You've then called those up.

52:50You've activated your resilience. You've put yourself in a highly intelligent, wise state. Now you're in a state that's more able to cope with that. So when I work with a patient, for example, I would never start with that. I would say, okay, let's talk about, you know, your favorite moments or your tell me a story about tell me a great movie. Yes. You know, let's talk about a great book, anything. and then we would focus on that. When they were in that state, I knew that I had got the mind-brain connection, the psychoaneurobiology. I feel like thinking about the things that have been positive in my life or experiences creates a neurochemistry to which I can create out of it.

53:22That's exactly what you do. Right. Yes, you have. You've changed all the flow. These change, they increase gamma, which is a way that you want to flow. Okay. And when your eyes are open, you want what we call low gamma across the whole brain. Okay. And then there's certain other patterns. I won't go into the details. And that's got to go into have a certain beta pattern and so on. Those energy waves, when they are flowing in that state, they activate the different parts of the brain to then be on high alert to respond and do what they're designed to do, which then impacts your neurochemistry, then your endocrine system, your cardio.

53:58Everything then comes together. And you are in this prime state. Your HPA axis is now on high alert. And you now are in the ideal state for solution finding. This is so good. You guys, this is why I do the show right here. So let me just give you this again. Step one, gather awareness. Step two, reflect. Step three, write, play, draw. Step four, recheck. Step five, active reach, which is basically what we've been describing here. What about physical movement and brain health? And it's not in here, but I want to ask you about that. I find that my anxiety and depression and concern and worry or angst is often something physically I'm doing.

54:33I feel like there's a physical nature to it. And I have found that when I change my physiology, I tend to feel like I've changed. Maybe your physical body is your unconscious mind. I don't know. I'll let you answer this. But when my body begins to move in a certain way, I have found that to be a pathway out of some of the negative emotions that I'm feeling. And I'm wondering, even with children, is part of the mental health issues we're seeing that they're less and less active physically, meaning a lot more video gaming, right? A lot more stuff on their phone, a lot more stuff on their Mac or their iPad.

55:07Whereas when I was a kid, I'm sure mental health issues were very prevalent. But we were outside playing. We were playing football. We were running around. We were running. There was nothing to do inside, right? So we were outdoors more. And I know that's not really part of what we're talking about here. No, it is related. Is it related? No, it's totally related. And part of it, you'll see in my books, in my NeuroCycle app, where all these steps are, the NeuroCycle app, I literally walk you through the process. and in the children's book, the active reaches, I encourage that physical activity.

55:33I encourage, and you'll see throughout the actual five steps you can bring in the physical activity in different ways. So basically your body, your mind stores in three places. Mind, which is all around you, these gravitational fields and so on. Brain, the trees, but in the body, in the cells. So therefore, that's why we have body memory. That's why when you have to recall something that you get your body response as well. So that body response is really important. For example, if you're trying to get your children to talk after school and they don't want to talk, let them have a little rest, but go for a walk.

56:04Start doing something. And the action activates and releases. So it's not that the non-conscious is the body. It's that the non-conscious is operating in the body. It's your driving system. It's mind driving. So your non-conscious is the thing that's always using every part of you. Your mind, brain, and body are on your side. We have this psychoneurobiological link that is our superpower, that literally when we understand how to read it, we can move forward. So you explained, you said that if you feel angst, you can feel your body feeling it. Angst, emotional warning signal. Your body feeling it, physical warning signal.

56:41You're probably not totally focused initially on your behaviors and your perspective. Then you move. As you move, you start unlocking and getting an idea of, and that's full under the behavioral signal as well. Then it starts unlocking the others, and you start getting into that space where you can work on going through this process. And then you can fit movement in anywhere. The reason I feel so big about physical stuff and brain mental health is like, take your spouse for a second. You think about the moments of your life that you feel the most connected. Let's just be honest. Some of it can be your sexual time with that.

57:11Why? What's happening? Something physical is happening between the two of you. When I want to open up, like with my children or something like that, when I really want to get them to talk, you're so brilliant. Because I found putting them on the couch or sitting on their bed is okay. But if we take a walk, we take a walk to your point, we're changing something there. Even laying on the couch with your spouse watching Netflix when they're actually touching each other and laying on each other compared to when they're on one side of the couch and you're on the other. There's a deeper connection when something physical is involved.

57:46The other part of it that you write about in the book that I've never really looked at before, and you talk about this particularly with children. So the book is written, you know, Dr. Lee's books have been for everybody. This one's more specifically guided towards children, but really everything in there. Parents for children. Right. So to have parents help parents help their children. Yeah, parents and children. Right. But sleep. So if you have a child or yourself, because I know this is true with me, when I'm not sleeping, something's not so good with me typically, right? But it's interesting to me.

58:13I never thought about sleep when it came to my children. If they're not sleeping, that's probably an indicator or something. So talk about sleep and children and even how it relates to each of us individually. Absolutely. Well, what I've tried to do in this book is to try and find the things that are no hot button topics to try and help parents have a and to teach the neuro cycle in such a way that it's super simple. It's very practical, whatever. So I take areas like trauma, sleep, et cetera. And I'm glad you've mentioned the sleep because there's so much scariness around sleep, too. Because, you know, you go to a doctor, one of the first things they'll say about you, is your child sleeping?

58:42Are you sleeping? And they have to sleep or they're going to die. It's not quite that extreme. But, you know, it's very fear-mongering. And, yes, there is a valid point to sleep. Sleep is very important. But how many hours of sleep a person should sleep in a day, we don't actually know. And also people have different patterns of sleep. So this thing that your child must sleep eight hours a day is… Not necessarily true. Yes, exactly. But if your child isn't sleeping and there is a persistent pattern of bad sleep, there's something going on. That definitely would be classified under your behavioral warning signals, and it's worth investigating.

59:14And that's why I actually put sleep neurocycles into the book on things. There's different ones that you can do because preparing yourself for sleep starts when you wake up in the morning. It's like when you wake up in the morning, the first thing is as the chemistry starts readjusting so that you can become conscious. at that moment to train yourself to just, what are my four signals? What am I feeling? Am I feeling sad? Am I complaining? Quickly assess, do a quick assessment of your four signals. So it's, what are my emotions? What's my body doing? What are my behaviors in this moment? Like, I know I'm lying in bed, but am I tense?

59:47And what's my perspective I don't want to do today? If you can catch that, those four things can take you 10 seconds and can really, really prepare you for a night's sleep. It sets you into it, opens your mind that you can actually then face the day. So that's one thing you can do. I've got a whole thing there that you can do, a sleep neurocycle for children as they wake up. Then if you see there's a pattern of children not sleeping, it's to find a time during the day that's a good time. Either early evening when they've been to school, they've had dinner, they've played. That's sort of a good time to kind of work around.

1:00:18But you can find, don't do this when they're exhausted. And then you can do a whole neurocycle to try and work through what the cause could be. When we don't sleep, the main reason we don't sleep, and a lot of people will maybe not agree with me here, but the main reason we don't sleep is because we have unresolved issues that we're scared of. Yes, I for sure agree. It changes your energy in your brain and your brain, all the things, the melatonin and all those things. Because there's so many cases, and I actually give a case in the study in the book of quite a traumatic situation of a child who was abused physically and sexually from three months of age but just could not sleep through the night.

1:00:49And they did everything, all the sleep aids, all the white noise, It's everything you can possibly do. And not that those don't work. They are definitely going to facilitate and help. But the core issue was the child's abuse and the impact of that, although the child was out of that unsafe environment, that you had to deal with what was going on. And that child was very young. So once the parent just happened to come across my stuff and do the neurocycle, and the child saw the parent doing it and started doing it, and within four days this child was sleeping. Now, this was an eight-year-old. They didn't use this book because this book wasn't out yet.

1:01:24The child saw what the mom was doing, saw the change in the mom because the kids watch us. And this was an eight-year-old and said, I want to do what you're doing. And so she adapted it as best she could, and this child started sleeping within four days. So the core issue there was a trauma that was unresolved. And you said it yourself. I know. I do. If I've got something that I haven't dealt with or something's worried me or I have that phone call before bed that sits, that's it. My sleep's gone until I've dealt with it. Can I give you one with children that I think is unsaid? And I know you're such a person of faith, so I'm going to give you what helps me sleep.

1:01:55And it leads to this unresolved stuff. And I just want to say this to everybody. It's prayer. And let me say why. So prayer at night is a chance for me to take my burdens and put them on my higher power. In my case, Jesus. But whatever your faith is. And I know you share my faith. And I wonder how many people are praying with their children at night. because this is an opportunity for your children to probably open up. I think it's an opportunity for them to relieve themselves of their burdens. And I have found that when I have really deep, beautiful prayer, even if it's brief, that I sleep better at night because there's a perspective that I get that I'm protected.

1:02:36Safe. And I really wonder that. The second thing is, I want to ask you about both of these. So this is for adults, but it also affects our children. More and more our children are on their screens late at night. I know this is just a brain issue. So it's not necessarily trauma, but there's all this data about blue screen time and how it's difficult to sleep. I don't know if it's accurate or not, but I know when you're doing homework, it's stressful. I think people let their children do their homework too late at night. And now that's a problem. Now it's a stressor. Now it's a trauma. Also, they're on their screen.

1:03:06And a lot of these schools put so much homework on their children. This is being real. It's like a real thing. Yeah, the school system is a problem. So when your kids get home from school, wouldn't it be smarter to get them, A, to start doing their homework earlier so they're off of their screens and away from stressful stuff before sleep? Also true for you as an adult. And just prayer. I know it's not a major part of what's happening in here, but am I right that both of those things would probably make an impact on sleep and maybe then their mental health? Absolutely. You know, if you look at prayer in terms of any religion or any philosophy or any belief, if people don't even believe in anything, it can be seen as a way of just trying to organize yourself and then believe that it's not just me, there's something more.

1:03:50And we know what's common to all mankind and that's love. So, you know, to talk to a child about loveness, so you could do a loveness neurocycle, you could call it a prayer neurocycle, whatever you want, but you can actually say, okay, well, let's look at what are. What am I feeling right now? And why do we think we feel that? And you can go through the five steps and that's your prayer. And your little active reach could maybe be in some quote, a little scripture. It could be a visualization of something, whatever, a beautiful quote or something like that. So that is basically a form of prayer because you're tuning into an unconscious, which is your spirit, which is your wisdom, which is your – and you're teaching a child to do that.

1:04:22So, yes, it is a form of unloading your burdens into either you believe it's Jesus, God, loveness, whatever. I love to talk about godness and loveness because that's something that's relatable to anyone. Everybody, right. You know, so you kind of step into that space. And there's so much physics behind this too and quantum physics and science behind how you're collapsing the consciousness. And, I mean, it's just we could talk for another two hours about that. So, yes, totally, I do believe that. And it'll set your brain waves to a point where your brain can start shifting into sleep mode, which will then have a neurochemical effect on the melatonin and those kinds of things and controlling adrenaline.

1:04:54and so it will have it has what I've shown with my work is that when you use mind stuff and specifically the tool of the neuro cycle which is mind management and as I said you can put whatever you want in that you are changing your psychoneurobiology so you're changing cortisol levels you're changing homocysteine levels you're changing all the things that can keep you awake you are getting them to the point where that you're dropping changing getting brain balance with the brain waves that kind of stuff so it's real I mean that's very very real I don't think I think I've done an interview in like 45 or 50 minutes with more stuff.

1:05:25We've done thought trees. We've done the neural cycle. We've done the non-conscious mind. We've done, you know, all of these different things here. We've done the highlight reel, which I kicked in here today. If I was to ask you, I could ask you one more question. Did you want me to answer the second part of the other question? Yes, yes, yes. What was the second part of the other question? The second part of the other question was blue screen time. Oh, yes, okay. Bullying, social media, all that stuff, it's immersed us in stimulation. so it's good very good and bad all we need to do is teach our kids to manage it that's the key it's not going away so it's not a bad thing if we know how to manage it so it's just finding what works for you and your family in terms of blue screens and all those things there's a lot of science that supports and contradicts the concept listen if a person's worked up it doesn't matter what you do about blue screens they're still going to stay awake so sometimes people if they're relaxed enough and they're watching their film or whatever before they go to sleep it's not going to be an issue It's very much up to the individual.

1:06:22It's how we are managing it. You've got to experiment with your child and with yourself and see what works for you. That's really important. So it's a bio-individual aspect. But just to bear in mind, if we don't manage the immersion that we live in. Before, for example, very quick, kids would get bullied at school. That's not anything new. Bullying has been around since the beginning of time. The difference is it follows them home now. It's 24. It's the immersion. It's an immersion experience versus an intermittent experience. And when you have that distinction, that's what – so we have to learn to manage the immersion.

1:06:50So, I mean, I can go for hours about that alone. But that kind of gives you a - Well, by the way, I would love you to stay for hours. I would actually love that. You know, unfortunately, you have somewhere to go. I can sit here all day. I know. I could stay all day chatting to you as well. Let me ask you one last question because I think people want to know this. I have a very good friend. I've been thinking about the entire interview who has a child that's just really had chronic struggles with mental health issues over and over to the point where they've done cutting and it's gotten really severe.

1:07:16and that child probably, in my opinion, should be more physically active. I know they have prayer in their life that neural cycle could be a game changer for them. So I can't wait for them to hear this. I really, really believe the neural cycle could be a game changer. And to think that maybe in 63 to a certain amount of days, if it's more traumatic, you said a little bit longer, that someone can create positive and or remove negative things in their life. Balance the two together. When is, I guess the last question I would have for today is, because it's worth asking, when is it time for medication with somebody in their brain is that something that you know i'm you must believe in some cases if someone's you know schizophrenic that potentially they need medication or do you believe medication never when does someone take a step and the risks of doing so okay so loaded question first of all you'll just quickly refer to your friend's child who's self-harming what is the age just very quickly teenager teenager okay so that what they need what we all need is to feel empowered and not to feel that there's something wrong with us and our current biomedical model will say that you've got a broken brain and so that creates a sense of hopelessness we also need to help our children develop psychological immunity so not just immune system like our immune system helps you know we build our immune system you build your muscles and resistance training we've got to build our psychological immunity and what we've taken from our children in a lot of our current models is that ability to say it's okay to be a mess.

1:08:37Let's work through this mess together. So a huge part of my work and the book that I've just released is about you as a parent knowing how to manage your own, get your own, and then model what they see. Model and model. Exactly. And then allowing a child the space, no matter what they say to you, no judgment, no compassion, but saying, listen, I see how you're showing up. I validate, I recognize. Let's work through this together. Here's a system that's scientific that we can work through together. And the key, Ed, is empowerment. You have to get a person empowered to change their relationship with themselves.

1:09:07And when that happens, that's when the growth comes. The cutting, the self-harm, whatever it is, alcohol addiction, whatever it may be, is coming from, yes, the traumas, you can go through all that. I bet you that child probably has had so much therapy that they can tell you why they're doing it to a certain extent. But to get the change in a person's life, it starts with feeling, okay, I am empowered to do this. It's okay to be like this. It's not me. I'm responding to life circumstances. is here's a plan for me to be able to move forward and be empowered to actually re-wise that my brain and my body do what my mind, what I know my wise mind wants it to do.

1:09:41So that's a simple answer to that. Medication is a very complex answer, but I'm going to do the easiest, quickest version. Up front, I'm not telling anyone to stop their medication immediately because of the withdrawal. Let's make a quick distinction between drugs and medicine. Medicines are aimed to try and fix a problem like insulin for diabetes. We can test for diabetes, we know there's a biological cause and we've got a drug that's fairly specific to the problem. When it comes to a child cutting, which is a behavior, depression, perspective of life sucks, battling, all the things that you describe with your friend's child, which is obviously this is very surface what I'm saying, but that cluster of things, that is not a brain disease that's going to be fixed by a drug.

1:10:27That's not coming from something wrong in the brain and a chemical imbalance. It's coming from some cluster of toxic issues and things that that child doesn't know how to process. Self-cutting, for example, is so much pain inside yourself that it's too much inside. So it's easier to transfer the pain to the cutting so that that pain detracts from the internal pain. And that's an energy that's no energy is lost. It's only transferred. So it's transferred energy. So we must transfer a child's energy into being able to create safe spaces so that they can talk to us as parents, not just the therapist, but us as parents, caregivers, people that they trust.

1:11:03Peers are fantastic for supporting. And that will help them sort of transfer that energy. So a drug is something that like alcohol, cocaine, and psychotropics, they fall under the same category. They're not fixing anything. They're not restoring. They're all drugs. and a drug is a psychoactive substance so it changes the state of the brain versus a medicine is trying to fix something so antidepressants aren't fixing chemical imbalance, that's been disproved it's a myth pillars of psychiatry that are used to say that you've got a chemical imbalance etc they're not doing that, what they're doing is they are providing temporary relief so if someone is in such a bad state so for example someone's having very extreme delusions and hallucinations which is not a disease of schizophrenia, it's schizophrenia symptoms.

1:11:52So instead of saying schizophrenia, bipolar, etc. as a label or diagnosis which is very unscientific and inaccurate and actually does harm, research has shown to the person. It doesn't recognize the enormity of what they're going through. It's rather, let's say, they describe it as behaviors because of something huge in their life and let's look at this whole person. They don't need a disease label and a medication to validate what they're going through. it's valid enough for them to get the support they need. A label and a drug put it in a little box and make it small, telling them the story, letting them talk, going through that process, gives it the size that it needs, if that makes sense.

1:12:27So the drug, the way I would recommend drugs is to see them as drugs, not medications. And if someone's in an extreme state, temporarily. Like if you have a headache, you take an ibuprofen to relieve the symptoms. But you don't go on ibuprofen chronically, in other words, every day. That's how we should look at these things. Great answer. So if someone's in a really bad way. Medicine. And by the way, she also said in the very beginning that if you're on medication, she's not encouraging you to get off of it. And if people do want to withdraw, I have interviewed top scientists in the world that are drug withdrawal experts.

1:12:58And they can go and listen to my podcast. And they can search through drug withdrawal. And they'll have the top experts with all the resources to guide them through that process. What a remarkable conversation. It just flew by. It did. It did fly by. You're brilliant. You're exactly how I introduced you. You're very kind. I think the neuro cycle can change people's lives, undoing trauma, undoing negative thoughts, but also creating your life through the neuro cycle. So, guys, I'd pour myself into that. You can get any of Dr. Leif's books, but right now you've got How to Help Your Child Clean Up Their Mental Mess, which, boy, do we need.

1:13:30A Guide to Building Resilience and Managing Mental Health, which all of you and I need. And we have Brainy, which is a toy for the kids that we've created. There's a Brainy character throughout the book, Ed, and we've made toys as well. So it's really something about the parent and the child. The child can hold us up and... You're awesome. You guys, get the book. Share the episode. Change people's lives. It's that simple. We're the number one growing show on the planet because y 'all share it every single week because I get brilliant people to sit across from me and we get the best from them in the hour we spend with them.

1:14:01Thank you. That was a great conversation. And if you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed Milet Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Now on with the show. Welcome back. So good to have you with me here today, and I'm honored to spend this brief time with you. I think I have something important to ask you about and for us to visit about today. So let's get right into it. What are your fears costing you? I think it's time to evaluate that. Like you and I right now, what are your fears costing you? You know, we have these weights that weigh us down in our life, these burdens, these fears that we have.

1:14:38Have you ever stopped to think about what it's actually costing you to have these anchors and these weights wearing you down, these fears? You know, people ask me all the time, Ed, is making your dreams come true, the work you put in, the sacrifices you made, the people that let you down, all the dark times in your life, all the times you went broke, both financially and emotionally, is it worth it? It's a very interesting question because they always phrase it that way. Is it worth it? Yet in our lives, we spend most of our times evaluating and contemplating what it's going to cost us. So let me say something to you up front.

1:15:15The price you will pay to become the person you're worthy of, the price you will pay to become the real you, the price you will pay to make your dreams come true and your vision of reality and the people around you blissful and happy, that price, and there's a severe price, is infinitely smaller than the price you're going to pay if you don't, and that others around you will pay. You know, I don't think God gave you another day in your life because you needed it. I think he added another day to your life because somebody needed you. But here's the thing. They need the real you, the authentic you, the one who's playing all out in their life and pursuing their dreams.

1:15:55I can tell you the answer to that question is as good as you think it'll be to make your dreams come true and dreams that you can't even imagine right now, visions of your life, but maybe even more importantly, as good as you think it would feel to meet the real you, the one you were born to be, and remember this, you were born to do something great with your life, but to finally get introduced or reacquainted or reintroduced to that person, maybe you years ago knew them very well, that version of you, but things have happened, these anchors, these fears, these toxic relationships, whatever they might be, these disappointments in our life, we've moved so far away from that person that we're capable of becoming that we don't even recognize them anymore.

1:16:31As good as you think it'll be to meet that person for the first time or once again, it's a million times better. Now, here's the hook. You have to start thinking like a rich person. And I don't mean just financially. I mean, rich in spirit, rich in emotions, rich in relationships. And for many of you, including me, we want to be rich financially. People ask me all the time, Ed, why do you put out all this free content? I mean, you put out the best content in the world. Everybody else charges for inferior your content. You put out the best stuff, and I appreciate when people say that, and you don't really charge for it.

1:17:01This is free. I do that because I believe in the law of reciprocity. I also want to make the world better, and I believe I put out enough good stuff. If someday I ask you to come to an event or participate in something, you probably want to come. I want to pour into you because I don't think God gave me another day because I needed it. I think he gave me another day because people need me, and they need you, and you need to remember you were born to do something great with your life, my brother, my sister. You were, and I want to remind you of that today, but I think it's time to evaluate what are my fears, my patterns, a toxic person in a relationship that I'm in with right now that's weighing me down.

1:17:38What's it ultimately costing me? Because it's just your life. That's all we're talking about. It's just you, just your life. And by the way, you're not getting out of it alive. You are not getting out of this alive. So all these things that are weighing you down are truly silly because at the end, we all end up in the same situation where our body eventually ceases to exist. And hopefully our soul goes to heaven. But in your case, you got to stop thinking like a poor person. And I'm talking to me as much as I am you. Let me tell you what I mean by poor, poor in spirit, poor in emotion and poor financially.

1:18:11See, when I was broke financially, when I would go into a store and I wanted something, I wouldn't get what I wanted. I would get what I could afford. Sound familiar? So I was a guy who would flip price tags over. Oh, it's this, it's this. And I would evaluate what it would cost me, not what it was worth. And so oftentimes in life, people ask me, Ed, was it worth it? But in their life, they spend most of the time contemplating the cost. It's gonna cost me this. It's gonna cost me that. You know, maybe I wanna become the person that would be able to cost me losing this person in my life. It'll cost me time.

1:18:45It'll cost me my hobby that I like spending so much time in. It'll cost me pain and emotion and whatever. It'll cost me, I'd have to let go of my fears. I'd have to let go of my patterns. And these invisible things that weigh us down in our life, they kill us. And so there's a lot of walking dead in the world. There's this old saying that, they say it about men, but it's people. Most people die 75 or 80 years old, but they really stopped living at 21 or 22 or 23 years old. We just don't put them into the ground until they're older. too many people are walking around like this, and maybe you relate to it.

1:19:21Maybe you relate to a percentage of it. These fears, these relationships, these things we worry about, these invisible boogeymen, what are people going to be thinking about me? Do you want to get to the end of your life? And if someone asks you, honestly, how did you live your life? Do you want to answer truthfully, scared? I lived afraid, afraid I wasn't good enough, afraid I wasn't worth it, afraid of what other people would think about me, afraid to lose people around me that didn't even love me, or care about me, or want me to be my best, I lived my life afraid. Or at the end, you want to say, man, I maxed out my life.

1:19:56I got all the emotions, all the memories, all the achievements, all the richness in every area out of my life. I maxed out my life. Well, I could tell you this, if you hold on to these anchors much longer, it's going to keep costing you. And the longer you do it, see, even these things, sometimes what holds us back is our feeling bad about things we've done in the past that we're not proud of. And we use these memories as weapons against ourselves. We stab ourselves with it over and over, or someone who's cheated on us or made a mistake. We use them as weapons against ourselves. And that's what you need to be asking yourself, whether it's worth it.

1:20:30Is it worth it to make your dreams come true? Is it worth it to change? Is it worth it to grow? You bet it is a million times better. Because when you make your original dreams come true, you don't understand the ripple effects of all these other things you can't even think about right now that happened. When you meet the real you, it's spectacular. You have to remember this. You can't love yourself. Everyone here, man and woman, macho man, and every single body listen to this. You can't love yourself if you don't even know yourself. And you can't know yourself if you're not truly being yourself.

1:21:01And these anchors cause us not to be us. I'm personally haunted with the thought of getting to the end of my life and never meeting me, never getting introduced to me. I want to meet that man. I'm interested in who he is. And I want to do the things every single day. Because once I got wealthy and I was rich and I went into a store, I didn't look at price tags anymore. I looked at whether it was worth it. And I got what I wanted. And our lives are a perfect metaphor of that. We're constantly evaluating the cost instead of whether or not it's worth it. Cost versus worth is a subtle difference. Is it worth it to change?

1:21:41Is it worth it to let go of these memories? Is it worth it to drop your fears? You will never meet you otherwise. Some of us are held back by crappy programming our parents installed in us when we were young. Remember this, most things in life are caught, not taught. We catch a way of thinking. We catch a way of having emotions. And we have to ungo. We have to unleash ourselves and let go of those things in our life. So what's the thing for you? What's the thing? Is it a person you need to let go of? Is it a fear you need to let go of? Is it an operating pattern? Is it a memory as a weapon you're using against yourself?

1:22:12Is it just you're just not sure? You got to remember who the hell you are. And if you've never met them, you need to get introduced and you need to get acquainted because I can tell you of all the jets and islands and cool stuff I've accumulated in my life, all the accumulations are wonderful. And I want you to accumulate the things you want that will provide memories for your family if they matter to you, the donations you can make, the people you can be there for, all the different things you can do when you get financially secure. All those things are incredible, but they don't bring us fulfillment.

1:22:41They can bring us temporary happiness, and there's nothing wrong with temporary happiness, but fulfillment, all of that stuff doesn't add up to meeting you, finally meeting you. At some point in your life, don't you want to meet you or get reacquainted because you once knew her, there was a time in your life where you knew her or him, you'll never meet them otherwise. And so I have to tell you something. You have to start, you have to start to make a bold move in your life because you're worth it. Your family's worth it. And the world needs you. You were born for a reason. You were born to do something great in small ways and in big ways in your life.

1:23:23And oftentimes in our lives, what hold us back sometimes is the stories we tell ourselves. See, it's not the events of our lives, circumstances that define us. It's the meaning we take away from those events. And those meanings create an emotion. And that emotion drives our behavior, that emotion of fear, that emotion of anxiety, that emotion of sadness. Or it could be an emotion of bliss, of confidence, of increase, of belief, of being guided, of being protected. But you have to ask yourself that question. See, it's not the event. It's the stories we tell ourselves. And listen to me. An emotion cannot exist long term without a story attached to it.

1:24:07You've had a lot of things happen in your life that were emotional, but the story didn't stick or you didn't take away the wrong meaning. It's so that emotion doesn't stay. If you're feeling one of those emotions, it's attached to a story. It's a story you're telling yourself. The emotion can't stay without the story. And the story is just the meaning you took from the event. It's just a meaning you took from an event. So sometimes the story you're telling yourself is, I don't want to be alone, so I'm hanging on to this person that still weighs me down. Or where I'm at is good enough because I don't want to risk what I've got.

1:24:39And that's a story. or I've made this mistake before or someone hurt me and what it meant was X, Y, Z and you have a feeling about it. These anchors are actually lies we tell ourselves that are anchored in a story that doesn't serve us, that causes an emotion that sticks. So if we change the story, either we take a different meaning from an event and say, could it have meant this? See, when I was a young man with my dad's drinking, I thought this means our family's less than and we're dysfunctional and all these things I attached to the meaning I attached to that story that was happening. And then at one point I realized, no, what was actually happening was God was using that to teach me how to learn to be present with people and read people and be empathetic with people and believe in people.

1:25:26And that God was using that story for me. When my baseball career ended, I was injured. It probably ended a career that would have ended anyway, quite frankly, but I was a pretty good player. And when I got injured, I remember thinking, man, this is my only dream in my entire life, right? God doesn't answer prayers, right? This was my prayer to do this, right? The meaning of this is I just was never good enough. The meaning from it was it just wasn't meant to be. I wasn't meant to be somebody. I wasn't meant to do something great with my life. And I attached all these meanings to what was a pretty traumatic event.

1:25:57But I could have attached the meaning of that time that God's got something bigger in store for me, that there's something bigger and bolder for me, And that Ed Milet I thought I was was not going to be a baseball player, but the Ed Milet I thought I was could be this other person who contributes to millions of people's lives. So once I attached a meaning to it, that what God really did was I probably would have played three or four or five more years and then been released and then been in my mid to late 20s. And maybe I wouldn't have taken advantage of a lot of the opportunities that came along.

1:26:26So that career ended right when it was supposed to so that I could start to redirect my life in a direction. And from there, I got a job at an orphanage, and that orphanage changed my life. Because of that orphanage, I met these young boys that looked just like me. These boys were all wards of the court. They were taken from their families, or their families were incarcerated or dead and had molested them at some point in their life. And so baseball ended, and I'm finding myself making$6 an hour at an orphanage. And I'm thinking, God, you took multimillion dollars playing in front of hundreds of thousands of people a year, 50 ,000 people a night from me to be with eight children in a cottage making six bucks an hour.

1:27:06And that's exactly what he was doing because what I needed to be was I needed to be connected with people. I needed to love people. And what's even crazier about it is the way I connected with those boys is they had grown up with all this pain and suffering and dysfunction in their homes. And that's what I grew up with in a different way with my father being an alcoholic when I was young. My career had to end that exact day it ended so that I would end up in that exact house with those exact boys and they could have someone who understood them, who could see them and knew who they really were because I was just like them.

1:27:37I recently said to Jesse Lee on my podcast, I said, all people that go through any pain in their life, especially when they're young, we have different eyes. We just have different eyes. Our eyes just say, please love me. Please protect me. Please be good to me. Please be kind. Please be gentle. Please believe in me. We have these different eyes. And I remember when I walked in there, they had my eyes. Not the same color eyes. My boys were of every ethnicity, every background. We had those eyes. And when I meet someone who's gone through pain in their life, I see those eyes. But I found out something.

1:28:14We don't just have the same eyes. We actually have the same heart. We have the same heart. And every single human being has that heart. It's whether or not they'll unleash it, unleash the real them, release the real them, or will they continue in their life to suppress the real them and settle for this less than version of them because they've created a bunch of stories and a bunch of fears and a bunch of relationships in their life that they hide in these stories. They hide in these emotions and they never unleash the real them. I've figured this out. All I've ever wanted to do is change how I feel.

1:28:48I didn't like how I felt. I wanted to change how I feel so I would accumulate and achieve and do things to change how I feel in my life. And as I've gotten older, I've realized if I can change how I feel, I can get all those things the easy way. And that's what I've started to do in my life, maybe from 40 to right now, 52 years old. So I want to challenge you today. Evaluate this thought. Evaluate what are your fears costing you? What are these anchors costing you? I want you to really pray about it. Really think about if you're on a walk right now, you're driving in your car, just what's it cost to me?

1:29:24And what would my life look like? Potentially. And by the way, you don't even really know. Just so you know, it's going to be so much bigger, so much more beautiful, so many small things that are going to happen along the way of you meeting you. And by the way, what's great is you'll continue to meet new versions of you. See, when you start to live your life without all these fears, without all these people anchoring you down with all these patterns and stories, what's great about it is there's a new you that shows up every couple years. And there's this new version of you, an improved version of you every year.

1:29:54One of the things I'm excited about is to meet the 55-year-old me. Because I didn't die at 21 or 22 like most people, getting around to bury me at 85 or 90. No, no, no, no. I'm reborn all the time. I can't wait to meet the 55-year-old me. I'm chasing that guy. And when I get there, I can't wait to meet the 60-year-old me. But the 25-year-old me was nothing like the 30-year-old man. I mean, a similar character, but different life, different contribution, different thoughts. Too many people are exactly the same person they were two or three years ago. And that's what it's really costing you, isn't it?

1:30:29And the reason you're not happy or as happy as you could be is you know this isn't you. You know this isn't you. You know there's more in you. Deep down in your heart and your soul and your spirit, the reason you're not happy isn't these other people, isn't your boss, isn't your job, isn't your body, isn't your lack of money, isn't any of it. It's that you know this really isn't you. You know this really isn't you. And it's time you meet him. It's time you meet her. It's time at least you get reacquainted if you once knew them. I want to challenge you to do that today. I want to challenge you to step out and drop whatever that anchor is or multiple anchors of these weapons you're using, these mistakes you've made, these choices that you regret, blah, blah, blah.

1:31:11Stop it. That's not who you are. Your destiny is now. It's in the future. It's moving forward. And there's something great waiting for you. And is the price worth it? Absolutely. Is the cost worth it? A thousand percent. Because eventually you start getting what you want, not just what you can afford in your life. And here's the truth. You can't afford to get to the end of this life without meeting you because only then will you love you when you're being you you can meet you and when you meet you you can truly love you it's time for you to step up remember once again i'm going to tell you he didn't add another day for you because you needed it he added another day because some other person in the world needs the real you