Dr. Martha Beck: Rewiring a Lifetime of Anxiety 

27:50and it wants you to be happy and calm. So let's go. It is 2030 and you are waking up in a normal day in your perfect life. Before you wake up, you wake up refreshed and rejuvenated and happy for the day. Don't even open your eyes at first. Just tell me what you hear. I can feel the wind blowing a little bit and I can feel the breeze from the ocean. I know that I probably have my window or my doors open. Oh, absolutely. Not probably. We're maxing this out. You want maximum performance? Max this sucker out. Okay? And look at the color of the sheets. What kind of sheets do you have? What kind of bedding?

28:34I'm picturing the ones I have. They are gray. They're gray satin sheets. Sweet. Cool. That's so awesome that you already have one component of your ideal life right now. So now I want you to sit up and look around the room. How big is the room? What does it look like? What's the color of the walls? Are there pictures? Yeah, there's pictures of my family. I got to be candid with you. It's actually the room I wake up in now. Awesome. Picture that room. It's actually where I am. I mean, not where I'm filming today, but actually this house, that room, I would say is that room. And you may not even know what you're doing, but maybe you see yourself with a bunch of friends in a cave or what, you know, I don't know, in a boardroom.

29:13I see my granddaughter in my lap on Bill, my horse, and she's not born yet and she's not conceived yet and no one's even ready to have a granddaughter in my family yet. But that's what I see. Oh, I have the shivers. I'm feeling the chill of truth here, Ed. All right. Take the brakes off what you imagine. What you imagine is it comes to you as easily if it's a big dream as if it's a small dream. I really agree with Joe Dispenza. We live the life we imagine, and most of us imagine the same thing we saw growing up going on forever. And so we never create anything but that. What do you see in the house?

29:53I see out of the house. So what would be different is that when I come down the stairs, I can actually see the ocean when I get down to that level. So I don't really see a lot of things in there that are different, but I know what I see when I look out. and when I look out, there's this huge wide open like door slider that you can walk out and you can look out from being in the house and you can see the waves crashing. That's what's... Oh my gosh. Little bit of theory. The reason our lives are so anxiogenic is we have been cut off from nature. I mean, that's one of the reasons. And we evolved to wake up to sounds like wind in the trees and birdsong.

30:30And there is research to show that those sounds give us homeostasis and the ocean does the same thing. So I love that you can't really see what's in the house because it tells me that your spirit is moving you out to commune with the natural environment where we evolved to be happy. So the big takeaway of my book was when I realized looking at the neurobiology of the brain that creativity and anxiety toggle, that they're opposite systems. And if you are in the anxiogenic part, the anxious part of your brain, and you drive yourself and you succeed in our culture, which is about being driven, you'll get as burned out as I did with my third Harvard degree, my third child and my third job.

31:14It was like, and my third progressive illness. Now I have no symptoms of those illnesses, by the way. They're not supposed to get better. They just did. And the reason they did was that I learned to exchange anxiety for flow. So you watch those waves. You're looking at the waves because the waves are telling you something. Can you feel nature speaking to you? The wave comes in and then it recedes. There is no push. There is no anxiety. There is the flow of everything in nature and everything in nature breathes in and then out and in than out. But our culture says, push, push, push, push, push, push harder, never stop.

32:02It's insane. And it's suicidal in the end. Y 'all should really do what we just did. Now, the reason that this is relatively easy for me is I've been doing some of this work now for about three weeks. Here's what will happen. It's the absence of anxiety. And like, you'll feel it in your body. Like you'll just like, it's the absence of it. Like you can't really do that work. And what it is, is it's curiosity, but it's also specificity and it's not rushed. And like, that's why even when she didn't ask, I said, I can actually feel the sand in my feet. Cause I've noticed with me, it's not just visual.

32:37There's some kinesthetic aspects of it, which is like, what am I feeling? Is the wind on my, and I can just be honest with you guys. It's a, for those of you that are like achievers, you're like, Hey, this is great, but I'll just be candid with you. It's very easy for us to get back to that other person. It's very easy to get back to the, all right, let's car max out. That's that, that place is easy to find. So it's not like I'm going to be in this meditation or in this moment, a hundred, but what I can do is potentially return back to that work without the stress load on my body, my heart, and my spirit.

33:11In other words, there's an ease, as she said, the flow to doing the work. And I'm going to tell you the number one thing that I have noticed the difference as I'm doing the work since I've been making some of these changes and this is huge for me my cognitive abilities to um recall things on cue and command have become much more heightened than before in other words like on stage guys finding references for talking points and things that were harder for me to find before are easier My I've written literally three or four brand new talks the last three weeks and not done them under duress or pressure.

33:52I haven't had any. I haven't had any angst as I've been doing it. I wasn't fatigued when I was done doing it. That's the other thing. I mean, I'm interviewing you, so I'm going to shut up here. But the other thing that other I want to acknowledge what you're teaching. The other part of it is I've not been so damn tired after I'm done my work. You know, I mean, Martha stipulates in the book, you can live anxiety-free. I'm not telling you I'm there in three weeks, but I've diminished it significantly. So, hey, guys, I want to jump in here for a second and talk about change and growth. And, you know, by the way, it's no secret how people get ahead in life or how they grow.

34:26And also taking a look at the future. If you want to change your future, you've got to change the things you're doing. If you continue to do the same things, you're probably going to produce the same results. But if you get into a new environment where you're learning new things and you're around other people that are growth-oriented, you're much more likely to do that yourself. And that's why I love Growth Day. Write this down for a second. GrowthDay.com forward slash ed. My friend Brendan Brouchard has created the most incredible personal development and business app that I've ever seen in my life.

34:52Everything from goal setting software to personal accountability, journaling, courses, thousands of dollars worth of courses in there as well. I create content in there on Mondays where I contribute as do a whole bunch of other influencers like the Avengers of influencers and business minds in there. It's the Netflix for high achievers or people that want to be high achievers. So go check it out. My friend Brennan's made it very affordable, very easy to get involved. Go to growthday.com forward slash ed. That's growthday.com forward slash ed.

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36:00When it comes to what your family eats and drinks, you know your choices matter. You're the expert because you know what fits your life. And getting it right starts with good information. That's why America's beverage companies are sharing more information about our ingredients at goodtoknowfacts.org. No spin, no judgments, just the facts straight from the experts for more than 140 beverage ingredients. Visit goodtoknowfacts.org. you talk about i want to use the term the correct way because i wrote this down sensing truth in the body that's kind of like a correlated tool right like i want to stay in there just for a minute because that's a big difference for me like i didn't realize how much i carry anxiety and stress in my body like back back aches fatigue um my feet are sore i I also have some autoimmune stuff.

36:55I'm actually Thursday this week going to see a rheumatologist finally about it. And this stuff is just starting. Here's what I can tell you all, guys. At about 54, this stuff just like eventually stacks in your body. It just does. And like you don't need to wait to be 54 to fix this like I am. You can be proactive with it. But can you tell them the tool about sensing truth in the body? Because it's sort of in the same zone here. It's finding your line. I mean, I had a friend who was a bodybuilder who went skiing for the first time and he was just, he wanted to be at speed. So he'd put himself straight down the line, level his skis and just go without, he would just go as straight as he could.

37:34And he would crash every time. But when he learned to go back and forth between letting the gravity pull you down and then letting the slope pull you up and then doing that again and again, you begin to move with the flow of nature and you become much, much more powerful. and it's not coddling. It's getting aligned with the forces of nature and science in the brain that can work hard, not work hard, work fun, work easy, work playfully. And all of that has gone out of it for a lot, especially of men, because it's considered sort of pandering to yourself. But my friend Boyd Vardy, who taught me to track lions, he lives in South Africa.

38:21And he was the one who told me that we were tracking lions and it was super exciting. And then he said, here's the thing. When you find the track of your right life, the print you're looking for, like you learn a lion's footprint or a rhino's footprint, you are looking for joy in the body. Joy in the body. And I was like, whoa, say that again. Really good. Most of us, because we've been tensed up and we've been gunning down that hill and we're going to crash and we don't care because we're tough. We are not even paying attention to the danger our own bodies are in from this sort of reckless course we're taking.

39:00So Boyd will take men out tracking and teach them to feel the insides of their bodies the way you're learning through illness. That's how I had to do it, too, through illness. And then you start to look for something in your life that gives you this feeling of uplift, ease, and joy and playfulness. When you said that about being on your horse with your granddaughter, who is just a twinkle in someone's eye right now. Right. I felt it was a track. Okay, that. And there are tracks that you're kind of sure of, like that probably is a lion. And then there's a track that is a dead cert. Yes. That one landed in my body as I was looking at you.

39:40So just in case people out there don't know how to get there, I've spent 30 years traveling the world and talking to people looking for the sense of what is truest. And I found that there's one thing that you can say, whether I've worked with prisoners, I've worked with heroin addicts on the streets, I've worked with billionaires. And everyone responds with the sense of truth to this sentence. I am meant to live in peace. I am meant to live in peace. And if you say that to yourself silently four or five times, you'll actually start to feel the physics of your body changing. It's a deep, deep truth.

40:25And that means that at no time, on no day, in no hour, in no minute, in no second are you ever required to do more than you can do in peace. And when you start doing that, what happens is not that you slow down, is that you start to ski life. You start the joyful feeling of just staying balanced in the things that you love while the forces of nature help you move forward, give it to you, lavish it on you. the universe is dying for you to be kind to yourself and when you are you're gonna feel that sense of truth so when you said that about the granddaughter that was like bong for me well for me i think it's i am meant to live in peace i think that's a bong i mean this is an all-timer you guys just because i'm such a good case study for a lot of you too right let me tell you what my wiring is, which is crazy.

41:26But my wiring is, okay, that's the lack of work. That's the lack of productivity. That's the lack of success. And so I either choose peace, everyone, I bet I'm giving you a breakthrough right now. I choose a peaceful state or I choose a productive state. And, and, and I think most people are like me, you may not have the level of anxiety or where that, but I do think when you picture peace, it's a Corona on the beach and that's it. And, And in my crazy wiring, like I think in order for it to have been work, I have to be tired and stressed. Does that sound familiar to any of you? This is when I put on my sociologist hat.

42:07Let's go. And tell you that until about 300 years ago, everybody woke up to the sounds of one another's voices, maybe water, maybe wind, maybe birds. and that they stayed with people they loved or knew all day long doing things that had a direct application to their happiness. Children played and learned by playing. When the industrial revolution started and factory labor became the biggest thing and obsessive materialism became the measure of success, they started installing like blaring horns in villages that would go off at 5 a.m. so everybody would have to get up and go into the factory away from their loved ones, away from nature, away from everything natural.

42:44We started batching children in same age, same size groups and making them sit at desks and learn things that had no application to their actual curiosity. We live in a bizarre, anxiogenic, crazy society that tells us we have to be productive. And the only image we can even have of peace is that we get a little break from that. But let me tell you different. When you leave the hemisphere of anxiety and you go into the right hemisphere, what happens as you start to restore the joy and the peace in all those little parts of yourself? I tried this as an experiment with myself and many clients as I wrote this book.

43:27And what everyone got was an absolute explosion of delighted creativity. Yes. And all the problems we'd been facing and trying to solve anxiously, we found those solutions because the right brain is wildly productive. When we let it out of the anxious gate, when we let it out of the social norm, it starts generating solutions that just will blow your freaking mind and your life gets so much fun. fun and everything. Martha, you're exactly right. You guys, choosing peace does not mean you're not choosing productivity. In fact, you're probably choosing more. Check this out, everybody. I've only been on her work for three weeks.

44:09And when I speak, which you guys know, I, I price, I don't know. I might be the most book speaker in the world. I'm, I probably am. And, and so typically when friends or my wife or kids say, how'd you do dad? I normally go, eh, it was a five or a six, or it was terrible or this, or I screwed this up. And it's very real. And it can be almost a debilitating process. And the last three weeks, there's been multiple occasions, including the last speech I just gave, where they had you do and I go, actually pretty good. And here's the kicker. I wasn't so tired afterwards. I didn't need to take a nap after.

44:48I wasn't, I, there's a place to create from that. And the only other experience I've had doing is I've been doing more faith-based speaking with my Christian faith. I've been doing more speaking doing that. And I've told many of my friends, the difference is, one, I'm better when I'm doing that. But two, I'm not tired after. It's not a grind because I think I'm in this peaceful state as I'm communicating. So, guys, this is not like whimsical, like let's sit on the beats, like what's your dream life. This stuff works. Next up is a little song from CarMax about selling a car your way. You wanna sell those wheels You wanna get a CarMax instant offer So fast Wanna take a sec to think about it Or like a month Wanna keep tabs on that instant offer With OfferWatch Wanna have CarMax pick it up from your driveway You wanna get it done to it You wanna do it all So, wanna drive?

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46:22What's an integrity cleanse? Oh, I love an integrity cleanse. When I was 29, I was completely miserable. This is the time when I had the three jobs, the three kids, the three illnesses. And I wanted to be free. And I was looking at all these wisdom traditions, and they said, the truth will set you free. So I was like, okay, I'm all in. I'm not going to tell a single lie of any kind for an entire year. And that is what I did. And please do not do this. That year, I walked away from or blew up my childhood religion, which was very intense. That meant losing my family of origin. I decided I really wasn't cut out to be an academic.

47:02I kind of hated faculty meetings. I basically burned every bridge but love. But let me tell you something, Ed. Oh, it set me free. Don't do it the way I did it. It hurts. Don't do it. every day, tell yourself, I am going to be aware of whether I am saying or doing things that feel like peace or not like peace. And if you choose something that is not like peace, do it deliberately and say to yourself, I am choosing this, but it is not peace. You say something to a person that's not really true. You say, okay, I said that, but it wasn't my truth. Stop lying to yourself. that's the first thing that's where i would say go on an integrity cleanse take a month and don't lie to yourself once but it's not but it's not one of those things where when your friend says how do i look at this you shouldn't go you look terrible you look fat like there's a there's a limit to it i'm paraphrasing what you said but i did things like that and it was horrible i mean i tried to be kind but i'd be like why do i say that's true so i learned after that year i decided that that's a big ear martha that's a damn here it was a big year the reason it started really was that i had a surgery for all the illnesses and within the surgery i had one of those experiences that are kind of near death um i wasn't dead but um i became very conscious and sat up and looked around and my body was tape like on the gurney or whatever they've had me on I'm like, how am I sitting up?

48:32And then I lay back and this light appeared. And I won't go into it too much. But oh, good heavens. That is how we are meant to feel. When that light touched me, the joy and the relief and the laughter and the beauty of it were just like nothing I'd ever experienced before. And then it said, you're not dying, but your job from here on is to go out and live your life so that you feel like this all the time. Do you most of the time? I would say about 95 % of the time, yeah. Really? Yeah, and I'm pretty productive. And you have great energy. You have very high but loving, kind energy. Is this you before that year?

49:22In other words, was this your energy? Were you this high energy, this kind of energy even before? Or is this a different being almost that I'm talking to? Exhausted, frantic, on edge, sharp and short with people because I was so tired all the time because I never slept. I cried so much. My ex-husband used to call me puddles. You know, I was a wreck, Ed. I was an absolute shipwreck. And that's why I took drastic measures to change it. And I think that's why I was given that experience in the surgery. I don't know if it was my brain or subconscious, whatever it was, but it reoriented me in a way that set me free from our culture's belief that anxiety is what we need to be happy and safe and productive.

50:06I dropped that lie. I knew it was a lie. You know, millions of people listen to the show. They love it. Is this my truth still? Is this what I still should be doing? I think re-auditing your life regularly feels good. I made some decisions a couple years ago about some people that I just like. They're just not in alignment with my integrity anymore. They weren't bad people by any means. It's just they weren't. And by the way, I know and you teach us in the book that this is an internal game, not an external game. But people are a part of your environment. Guys, we've only done 10 percent of what's in the book.

50:38Maybe not even that. But we shouldn't let everybody go without them at least knowing what the sanity quilt is because this is another thing. It's still remember it, number one. And it's also just valuable. And let me say one thing as she answers this, you guys. You will unleash new levels of productivity and creativity if you will begin to ask that question, and I have it written down here, and that statement to yourself that I am meant to live in peace. And when you repeat that over and over and do these exercises, you'll unleash more productivity, more energy, more success, more bliss and joy in your life, not less.

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51:37Let's at least make sure that we let them know about the quilt. Okay, so I was thinking, you know, society gives us patterns that we're meant to replicate. Okay, I get a good job. I become ed. I become really successful and wealthy and people love me and admire me and everything. And that's the public speaker mode. And then there are people who take the accountant pattern. And it's kind of like making a quilt by very, very carefully gritting out the pieces and making sure they're cut right and sewn together perfectly. Now, there's something called a crazy quilt where you take pieces of fabric that just don't really match anything, but you love them.

52:15And you take your favorite and then you take your next favorite and you just sew them together. And then you take your next favorite and sew that to the first two. And you go around and around in a spiral until you've got a quilt that you can square off and finish. And they call that a crazy quilt. And I thought, that's how I want to live my life. And that is how I do live my life. I take my very favorite things and I put them in the center. of my attention, if not my time, always in the center of my attention. And then I take my next favorite thing and I put them together. So for example, I talk about South Africa a lot because I'm in love with it and I'm in love with the wild land there and the people there.

52:53And I love to coach people. So I was talking to the owner of the preserve who, his specialty is he restores nature to its pristine, beautiful Eden-like form. And he said, the problem is I could restore all the planet, all the ecosystems on earth, but you can't change people. And I say, Dave, I can only change people, but maybe. So we put it together. And now every year I go to South Africa and I coach seminars by taking out people to, you know, learn from animal trackers and learn from the animals themselves and be in this primordial place where humans develop. Two things I love, the African wilderness and coaching.

53:37Throw them together. Now, what's the next thing? I like to do watercolors. Great. Put that on next. What's the next thing? I love jokes. Okay, put jokes in there. And so you go round and round, putting the things you love at the center, and you will create what I call an economic ecosystem where your joy and your vividness will be so infectious that people will start paying you to do what you're doing. I never set out to be a coach. People just kept asking me and paying me. I couldn't figure it out. I still can't. But anyway, the result, I thought it's not a crazy quilt. It's a sanity quilt. It's insane to get up and live your life like a robot.

54:19It's insane. And Jeff Bezos tells all his employees, he says in his annual reports, to wake up terrified and stay scared all day. Huh? Why? Why? To be more productive? Well, he's already one of the richest men in the world. So is it really worth thousands of people living in constant fear? That's the quilt of our society. Everybody goes, oh, that sounds right. To me, that's the insanity. And putting your life together out of the things you love, and it will not look like anyone else's quilt. But I call it a sanity quilt because it will give you back to yourself. So good, Martha. This is so good.

55:00I, I want to go five more minutes. I'm sorry. It's just, it's really, it's really, I love you. Are we tired? We are not tired. We are pain here. Right. We are. And I, I, I haven't done a lot of shows where like, I want to really keep going. And so, um, my audience knows this when they listen. It's just that I just feel like, I feel like we're, I'm, I'm trying to find something in here for all of you today, guys, because I just want you happier. You do deserve to live in peace. And so I just, I want to reach as far as I can, because I care about you as a human being. And I, and I know a lot of you, this is easy to slough this off and go, yeah, I'm going to get around to this when, and I, I am a, I'm a 54 year old who waited to get around to it too long.

55:45You don't need to wait to get around to it for one second. You can begin to give yourself these gifts. Let me ask you this last, by the way, I want to say the book's name before we're finished, which it's Beyond Anxiety, Curiosity, Creativity and Finding Your Life's Purpose by Martha Beck. So now you guys know the book is always finished with that. But I want to ask a question after that. If there was something we didn't cover today, like someone just says, hey, Martha, I heard you on the Ed Mylet show. They ran into you at Starbucks and she said, I got all this stuff. I'm working on my sanity quilt and I've got, you know, the I've got this visualization technique of my perfect day and I'm treating myself with kindness.

56:20I'm repeating the right thing. But when anxiety pops up, is there something I can do quickly that's like a hack? Everyone's always looking for a hack. Can you give me a hack? Yeah, here's your hack. And it's the entire life's work of a great psychologist named James Pennebaker. He just did this experiment once where he had college students write down what they did for a summer vacation. but he had some of them write down something traumatic or difficult or unpleasant that they were dealing with. Right after doing it, those students were a little disturbed, but for a long time afterward, they had higher levels of satisfaction and health by any number of measures.

56:57So here's what I want to give you as a hack. If you have even a second with your phone, with a notebook with your computer sit down get calm and and look for any part of you that is feeling anxious at all and just say are you okay in there write it down with with your hands are you okay in there and then if you're writing in a notebook switch to your non-dominant hand and let it let yourself write whatever comes up you don't have to switch hands but if you do it some more surprising things come up. But if it says, I'm really anxious about, like, I'm looking for anxiety myself right now. I can't find any.

57:37This is the problem. I have trouble coming up with examples. That's awesome. Okay. I'm kind of anxious about the geopolitical state of the world. So I would write down, and it was, I'm nervous about politics and things. And then I say, I would write down, tell me everything. Put it all down. Tell me everything. I care. Now, it is playful, but it's deadly serious, too. The part of you that is saying to the horse, you're okay, I've got you. In order to write to the part of yourself that is anxious, you force the awakening of a part of the brain that is compassionate. Did you use that voice as the voice you want us to use?

58:20That's why I said playful. or we're using that voice as a point of emphasis for the show. You follow what I'm saying? I was being a bit silly. Okay, okay. I want to make sure because I didn't know that because there is a technique where you'll use a playful voice to minimize something's impact. So that wasn't that. That was you emphasizing the terminology. Okay. Weirdly, it can help if you're doing this aloud. It helps to whisper. When we whisper, the right side of the brain turns on. I don't know why. Psychiatrists taught me that. I believe it. Yeah, so really genuinely. And if you walk in and your spouse or your kids are being grumpy and obnoxious, don't get caught in that.

58:57Sit down with them. And you will only be able to do this with them if you can do it with yourself, your employees, everybody. You sit down and say, what's going on? Tell me everything. And then they say, well, and then say, say more. Tell me more. But after five to 15 minutes, most of your problems will have been solved by the creative right side of your brain. If you engage in this dialogue and you will start to discover the compassionate witness that is actually what you are. Can I lay out a really trippy quote from an Indian guru here? This guy named Nisargadatta Maharaj. She said, mind is interested in what happens while awareness is interested in the mind itself.

59:44The child is after the toy, but the mother watches the child, not the toy. So an anxious thought is clutched in your mind the way a child would clutch a toy. And when you say, are you OK? I'm here. Tell me everything. you become the loving parental force that can embrace your anxious self and then it can like a like a tired horse that you finally when you got that horse out how did it how did it act once you got it free actually i could tell you his name is bill and once we got him out and he calmed down he was uh he there's mud he was rolling around in the mud and playing in the mud he was super happy, like overflowing with joy afterwards.

1:00:28He breathed. He breathed a bunch, by the way, at first too. Yeah. And you'll find yourself breathing more deeply as you go through this exercise. Tell me everything. The part of you that is in compassion breathes more deeply. It's really interesting. You'll see all kinds of physiological effects just from writing down. Are you okay in there? And then, no, I'm feeling a little blah, blah, blah, blah. Tell me everything. tell me more. No, I'm not anxious anymore, but I thought of a solution. It's actually really fast. Slow down enough to do it for five minutes and it will speed up everything you're trying to get done.

1:01:02I love it. I'm going to do it with a non-dominant hand too. So she threw that in there. I'm going to do that. This was extraordinary today, guys. You're welcome. And I'm grateful to you, Martha, for the work you do. It's helped me. Everybody can tell from listening to today's show. And I'm honored that I get to share some of your work with the world today. And you are a miracle on legs. And I'm so grateful for what you put into the world and so deeply honored to be here with you and to be heard by whoever happens to listen to this. There's going to be a bunch. I can tell you that. I want to meet you in person.

1:01:34So I hope we get a chance to do that. If you have another podcast, we have to agree to do it in person. I'll come down to Florida. I'll be right there. All right. I love that. All right. Thank you for today. Thank you, Ed. So good. Everyone share today's episode. Everybody needs to hear a piece of this. There's some piece in there today. Somebody needs to hear that you love and that you care about, starting with you. God bless you. This is The Ed Myland Show.