How to Stop Wasting Years of Your Life With One Simple Word

23:53I don't know where they rank, but this is on there somewhere where I completely changed my perception of what a day looks like. And then the last thing is this, in life, you don't always get your goals. You don't. People say, I want more self-confidence. Everybody knows. Keep the promises you make to yourself, you'll probably get more self-confidence. Because self-confidence is a relationship and reputation with yourself. And if you can keep the promises you make to you, you're going to be a pretty productive person. But what if you had a higher standard? There's a chapter called One More Higher Standard.

24:21You always get your standards. You don't always get your goals. But if your standard is I always do one more, I always do one more. Now I keep the promises I make to myself and one more. I'm going to tell my daughter I love her every day and one more time. I'm going to do 10 reps on the bench and one more. I'm going to make 10 contacts and one more. I'm going to text message five friends, tell them I love them and care about them today and one more. Now you've changed your life the way you manipulate time because your standard is different for how you conduct yourself. And you've elevated that standard which has an energetic aspect to it.

24:55We have a frequency that also gets into that reticular side of things where things become, or you become aware of them by what we think, say, do, believe, and feel those five different levels. It gives us a deeper purpose. And you and I are both extremely faith-based people. And through that aspect of faith, we integrate energy and quantum science, the mathematical side of things. How does your purpose and faith that is integrated together relate to energy and quantum science, the quantitative side of the world? No one's asked me that. So that was the hardest chapter for me, brother. One more prayer, because I wanted to talk about my faith because I'm a faith-based person, but I also didn't want to put off people who didn't share my faith.

25:43And because I'm also science and quantum-based, I believe there's a quantum field. In fact, I don't believe it. I know it. I just happen to believe there's almighty creator that created it. That's all. I don't know why that's in conflict with people. And so, right. So there's this whole notion that, well, if you're faith-based, you're not scientific or energy. And if you're energy based, you're not faith-based. You and I know tons of pastors and rabbis that are very energy based people that are also dogmatic in their faith. And so why do I love you so much? Because we vibrated a similar frequency.

26:11And so there's a connection there. We've all felt energy before. We've all been able to vibrate at a frequency where there become answers to things that really we're not capable of answering on our own. And so for me, I know I feel energy. The key thing for most people is that if you don't believe in energy, you don't really believe in influence. You don't believe in inspiration. You don't believe in connection. You're always making people feel something. You're always emanating an energy. You ought to start to take control of what that is and be intentional about it and work at it. Because that is energy is influence.

26:41Energy is love. energy is emotion and so every part of my money and money don't forget money everything is and so it all has an energy frequency a vibrational frequency and so although i'm extremely faith-based i'm a christian you and i've sat around and talked about these things many many times i'm blown away by the fact that i that people would think well that would i would deny the fact that there's quantum energy in the world that's like denying that there's gravity i just happen to think that the gravity and nature and oxygen the way it relates with animals and all that stuff came from one place.

27:13But having said that, I'm very much, you know, some of my dearest friends are the people that are the best in the world at it, like Dr. Joe Dispenza. So, and yourself and others whom I admire greatly. So I'm super energy based. I'm super quantum based. And I can tell you that I believe in this podcast as a particular energy frequency to it, that people will respond to different than other ones, because there's two dudes that vibrate a particular way, spending some time together. You know, what's so amazing is we grew up similar in so many respects, but also differently in our faiths. And yet we ended up in the same place as faith.

27:45And one time when we first met, you had a statement and you said, God is good. And it wasn't just you were saying it. I almost cried when you said it. And I thought to myself, 20 years ago, if I met Ed Milet, because I was at a different frequency, I would have had judgments and conditions that separated a brother of mine, someone that I'm so connected to and through, inspirationally, energetically. And I would have let those three words, which I state every day as many times as I can today and believe full heartedly, despite my background, which is different than yours religiously in the dramatic sense.

28:23And no one in the world, I think I share beliefs with as much as I do at my left. And I hope he takes that as the compliment. And I study very hard to understand that. Why do you think people resist that defining moment for me in faith that look there's something bigger than us that loves us more than our mom loves us and that gives me the faith to be protected and promoted at all times and everything I look upon I say to myself God is good and I don't want to separate myself from anyone when I say that but I know that there's listeners right now going I didn't know Dave Meltzer was was a Jesus freak you know I know they're saying it and I know they're saying and I know my rabbi brother's saying, oh my God, did he not learn anything?

29:09But I believe God is good. And so do you. And that's what has blessed me to be where I am today with you on this podcast. Yeah, brother. I love you. I think that it's resisted because the truth is that religion has gotten the way for a lot of people getting to know God. And religion's done a lot of negative things in life. It's done a lot of positive things too, but organized religion. I think even some of my most devout pastor friends would say, hey, it's bumped up on doing some stuff. There's been a lot of wars over religion, right? There's been a lot of judgment over religion. And I don't really, I guess I'm religious in the sense that I'm a Christian, but I'm not a religious person in the sense that I subscribe to a particular dogmatic church.

29:52And so I think that's what the gap is. I think, and by the way, I think it's a reasonable assessment of people over time. I know something you don't know. I'm right, you're wrong. right? And that's not something God would ever say. That's not something that's true. And so what I have is a relationship with God, which means it ebbs and flows. When my dad died, I wasn't happy with God, right? When my dad got cancer, I'm like, what's going on here, man? What are we doing, right? So it's okay to question one's faith. In fact, if you don't, someone that never questions their faith will never grow in it.

30:25And so I just think the answers to life lie there. And I would just tell everybody to embrace your version of what God is. And the more you explore that in your heart, I think the more, by the way, any of you listening to this, here's what I do know about you. You wonder, you wonder, it's a calling that's been on your heart since you were a little boy or a little girl. You've always wanted to know. You always wanted to explore that. In fact, it's always going on in the back of your mind. What's true? What's life all about? What happens when I die, right? Most importantly is what happens when I live.

30:57And so I think these questions are beautiful and I don't think you should avoid them. And I think you should be open to whatever inspiration and answers you get and not use the judgment of other human beings or dogmatic religion from people to cause you to be suppressed in your pursuit of it because it's a beautiful pursuit it's what life's all about and you will find more bliss and happiness as you find your version of those answers and that beautiful pursuit in this idea of one more uh takes that faith that that understanding and you've really helped me understand what is the paradox or the paradigm of my life that I don't need to go get more healthy, more wealthy, more happy, more worthy.

31:41Because of my faith, I am happy, healthy, wealthy, and worthy. I just got to figure out what I'm doing to interfere with it. And the concept of one more to me is clearing the interference. It is clearing the interference because every time we say I'm gonna call my daughter you know I have minimums in my life I'm gonna call her one more time or one more minute which isn't easy with teenage girls but I'm going to do it even if they I feel rejection at times but it's never too late to have this one more philosophy of clearing the interference of our potential and everyone has different potentials how come so many people think well it's too late yep because they're carrying around baggage of the things they're ashamed of the things they failed at, they think, their defeats.

32:28They think they're invisible. They think they're not qualified. They're not special. You don't know about the things I'm embarrassed by. You don't know about my bankruptcy, my divorce, my financial setback, this sin I've had. And we carry those things around with us. And because so we think that somehow that disqualifies us from helping other people and living our best life. In fact, the opposite is actually true. I got to tell you something, bro. I haven't told you this yet. So I wrote this book, The Power of One More, basically when my dad died and and all the lessons in it about two weeks ago i woke up about 3 15 in the morning crying this is just for me and you but everybody gets to listen and it answers your question perfectly and i woke up and i told christiana i said babe she goes yeah because what changed my family life forever is my dad got sober that one decision changed our family i'm not talking to you right now if my dad doesn't do that i don't help millions of people unless my dad makes that one decision.

33:22I said, babe, she goes, what? I said, someone helped daddy. She said, what, honey? I said, someone helped my dad. And I've never thought about it before. Someone helped my dad get sober. She goes, oh my God. I said, I don't know who they are. That family, by helping my dad, changed millions of other people's lives. And Max and Bella's lives, my children, are deeply affected by this precious soul helping my dad in some quiet place, in some room somewhere that no one will ever know about. And I said, here's what's amazing, babe. Do you know what qualified that person to help my dad? Their messed up life.

34:07They were a drunken and alcoholic. All their mistakes, all the things they were ashamed of, all their life experience, that's what qualified them to change my dad's life and change my life and change millions of others whoever this person is it's some quiet coffee shop somewhere or a room somewhere they saved my family little did they know all those years they were drinking and using drugs was preparing them to change the world and it just occurred to me two weeks ago so if you're listening to this, your mistakes, your setbacks, your experience, your failures, your sins are the very thing. That mess is your message.

34:48It's the very thing that qualifies you with your intent to serve, your giftedness, and your experience to make a difference in the world and live greatly. And there's no better example of that than whoever this precious soul is that changed my family and millions of families forever because they were an alcoholic at some point in their life. And there's great significance to that in our lives. You know, one of the things that I can't still fathom is the size, scope and scale of how what I call the protection and promotion in my life, the mistakes, failures, setbacks and sins, as I see them as a hot stove that as a three year old I try to reach out to.

35:28And of course, my mom slapped my hand and she's never really hit anyone and screamed at me and she screams at very few. And I immediately said, why am I being punished? Because I didn't understand the stove was going to burn me. And, you know, here with faith, whatever your dogmatic beliefs are, with faith, there's something bigger than us that loves us more than my mom loved me at that moment to protect me. there is no punishment that that person that saved your father and saved his legacy and saved his family and now has saved millions around the world because it has given you the opportunity to be saved to be saved from yourself from the lessons and the love and the light that has always existed through you to others but I can't still I get choked up fathom when we have a young kid that begs me, hey, Mr.

36:19Meltzer, there's only two podcasts in the world I listen to, Edmire Letta and you, and can I please meet him? He has changed my life. I come from the Bronx and his family, and I've got a college education. I'm inspired to do great things, to be kind to my future self and to do good deeds in the world, to touch other people exponentially, brother, right? Exponentially, it doubles. And I see you doubling the thousands and the millions of people that are going to sit there someday and say, thank you, Ed Milet, or thank you, whatever the name of those guys were on their podcast together, that somehow planted a seed or watered a seed that changed an entire legacy.

37:04How do you deal with the importance of the ability to touch that many lives? First, I love you. You're special. you're the special one of all this stuff i've been doing um and i know you know that i feel that way i don't know why i'm gonna get emotional too it's this first time step back it's pretty cool that two rich guys are talking about this stuff you know i mean right like there's very few profound conversations and um you and i've had several of them now and i'm glad this one's being recorded i just deal with it like this i what i i don't think god calls qualified people I think he qualifies called people and I just feel like I'm called to do this and one of the things I talk about in the book is like how do you change your identity and your self-confidence and I say there's a trilogy faith intention and associations but the second one's a biggie how do I deal with it because I'm not I don't have every answer I do make mistakes I'd like to sound I'd like my life to be as smooth and as beautiful and as elegant as it sounds like in an interview but it's not There's mistakes I make all the time.

38:10But I know this about me. When I was a very young man, I know you know the story. Well, not that young compared to a lot of people listening. I was 30 years old. I won an incentive trip to go to Hawaii. And I'm running down the beach in the morning before the sun got up. And this man's running towards me. And he gets closer and closer and closer. And I realize it's Wayne Dyer. And those of you young bucks, if you don't know who Wayne Dyer is, Google him. But Dave definitely knows who he is. And I said, I was running with a Sony Walkman on. Sony Walkman. And I go, Dr. Dyer, you changed my life.

38:39And he lifted off his Walkman after he had ran by me. He goes, I doubt that. I bet you changed your life. But he goes, how did I help you? And he walked towards me and we sat on the beach together and watched the sun come up. Can you imagine? And at that time, he was writing a book called The Power of Intention. And here's what he said to me. And I'll impart this wisdom on to everybody else on this topic. He said to me, Ed, you're going to change the world. And I'm sure he had said that to other people. But for me in that moment, I felt like I was the only person he goes, and it's, there's a, there's a spirit about you.

39:09There's a, God gave you this voice and he gave you this ability to communicate. You're brilliant. And I'm like, just my hero saying this to me. And he goes, and none of that's why you're going to change the world. You're going to change the world because you intend to do well. You intend to serve. You intend to contribute. He said, I sense beautiful intentions on you, Edward. And I knew that was true of me. I've never believed I was talented or smart. I've never believed I was special, but I do know my heart. I do know I intend to help people. And he goes, the rest of your life, never link your confidence to your ability to do something.

39:44Link it to your intention to serve. And I've never forgotten that. That makes me emotional because I'm not the most talented guy in the world. I'm not the smartest. I'm not the biggest, the fastest, the strongest, the blah, blah, blah. I'm none of those things. But I do have a pretty good heart. I do intend to serve people. And so before I do a podcast like this, before I give a speech, before I do any business meeting. I do remind myself of my intent and I have tremendous confidence in my intentions. And I would acknowledge, I would tell everybody out there, maybe you should take a page out of that book.

40:12Maybe you should read that chapter in my book too. But your intention to contribute, to have a pure heart, to serve people, to make a difference is where your confidence should come from. Because you'll find whether it's your God or the energy field or a combination of both, the answers will come your way. The answers, you will find the people, places, and things that you need that are requisite to you delivering on this intention you have, but it starts with the intent. And that's how I carry that, you know, that not burden, but honor and privilege of some people wanting to hear what we have to say is that I know I intend to help.

40:44And usually the spirit helps me move them in the right way. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. We have all the links in our show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. So you know those pieces in your closet that you find yourself wearing like on repeat all the time, that sweater that kind of just goes with everything or these perfect pair of pants. Those are the pieces that make getting dressed easy, and that's what Quince does best. Quince focuses on high quality wardrobe staples with premium materials like 100 % Mongolian cashmere, organic cotton.

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41:51Now available in Canada and the UK, too. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E dot com slash ed. So you know I've been trying to take my health and my morning routine to the next level. And I used to do a whole bunch of different stuff, tons of different supplements. And then I found all in one in a drink with IM8. IM8 is the way to simplify your supplement routine finally, once and for all. 16 supplements replaced 90 ingredients across 9 major organ systems in one drink. You can have all these supplements for$2.61 a day. I've changed my mornings. The whole I am eight routine has changed my mornings. I feel great and I bring energy to the entire day.

42:29Go to I am eight health.com slash ed 10 right now, or click the link in the description and use code ed 10 for a free welcome kit, five free travel sachets, plus 10 % off your order. That's code ed 10 at I am eight health.com slash ed 10 code ed 10 at I am eight health.com slash ed 10. These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, prevent any disease. On with the show. Each of you, you and I included, we were born to do something great with our life. We were born to do something great with our life. And it's important to check in from time to time of what that current great thing is.

43:12And sometimes we think it's the big things. It's the people that are on both our shows. They've made this big movie. They've got this big song. They're this big thing. Who's greater? The man who helped my dad get sober or the fact that maybe I've helped some people because my dad got sober. That one act was greatness in his life. That kind moment with another person that says, I can help you. Let me connect with you. And so don't discount your own greatness, your own call to do something great. And it doesn't have to be a script or a play or a book or a speech or on social media. It's just doing something great and you matter.

43:49I don't mean this hokey. I'm telling you the truth about you. You matter. You were born to do something awesome with your life. Your family is supposed to do something great as a family. And maybe it's just checking in and reminding yourself of that and then asking yourself, what is that thing right now in my life? And so I just think that reminder is so important that, you know, it's great to voyeuristically look in on successful people or what we think are successful people. it's also important of the camera turn back on you and go you matter you matter you're great and that's probably the most important thing we'd say today oh gosh man yeah and you know one thing you just clarified beautifully is that great doesn't have to be big and big doesn't mean great right and i think we're so obsessed today we are in that to do something great it has to be big It has to be bold.

44:44You know, when I think about myself, honestly, Ed, and I can say this to you because I think in these sessions and when we spend time together, you've heard my heart. I was one of those people who actually never believed I could do any of this stuff I've done. I never set out when I started and I was like, oh, one day I'm going to be, I didn't have any of that. That's not how I'm wired. I was wired in like, I want to serve. I want to serve whoever comes. whether it's five people 10 people i'm happy i'll serve them and as i started to do that i got more confidence okay now i want to serve larger groups okay let me serve them and then it was like and i never believed at any point that there were these arbitrary abstract goals of like number one this like those weren't how i set out and so when i'm listening to you speak i hope someone's out there thinking, Jay, I'm like, Jay and Ed, I'm like you guys, where it's like, I don't vibe with all that like, like motivation.

45:43It's like, I just vibe with the fact that I want to have a great impact, like the person that helped your father. Yeah. And you know what we've both found in our life too, just to give you insight from someone called me seasoned today, you know, this is that, you know, the universe or God really prepares you to step into the next room when you step in with some faith. And so maybe it does start with five or six people and maybe that's enough, but perhaps in that space you're in, there'll be a little door open. And if you step into that one, you'll, you'll find, I think we think I have to have it all figured out.

46:16Wozniak's a good buddy of mine who started Apple. They didn't, they were a board company. They didn't know they'd be doing this someday. They stepped into the next space. And one thing I think we also want is an immediate result. And I talk about this in the book, maybe this would be the last little thing I'll share with you but i went to a birthday party as i was writing the book and it was for a young boy and they had a pinata we've all been to especially live in california you have the pinata and so what they did is they took each of these little guys they blindfolded them and spun them around and they're all dizzy and they're swinging and they're not even near the pinata that's life a lot of times you feel like man i'm blind i don't even know where i'm swinging right now but i'm swinging and so each kid hit the pinata and the candy didn't come out and so they take the blindfold off.

47:01That kid got tired. The next little boy came up, spun him around. So like seven of them hit this pinata. No candy came out. The last boy, the smallest boy, the youngest boy there, they filled the blindfold on him. They spin him around. He's swinging too. That's life. You just sort of swinging, right? They finally point him at the pinata. He hits the pinata just once. Bam! All the candy comes out. And all the kids jump on and celebrate. And I'm watching that and I'm going, Now, who broke the pinata? Was it the last shot or was it the cumulative blows of each of the shots on the pinata? Well, we all know the answer.

47:35It was the cumulative shots. Life's a lot like that, man, that we're taking shots, but we don't see any physical progress. But every one more we're doing is compound pounding progress. And in life, you have to be willing to buy into what is invisible progress. Most people quit on their dream, quit on their vision before the candy comes out. And what you and I didn't do is quit. We just kept swinging. And eventually the candy comes out. The candy could be your bliss, your joy, your financial success, your notoriety, your contribution. But most people are hitting the pinata of their life and there's no evidence it's working.

48:14But the truth is there's a compound pounding effect in life that if you keep hitting your life's pinata, If you'll stick around, there'll be some candy come out. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. If you want to hear the full interview, be sure to follow the Ed Milet Show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode that way. Now on with the show. Now, how do you, so one, I hope that people actually listen to you because people do discount themselves. They do things or have things happen to them that they're not proud of that they think define who they are.

48:47and they never allow themselves to bring something beautiful to the world again, which is an absolute tragedy. So if the one is bringing this new way of thinking, if the person that thinks they are the most disqualified is able to channel that and make somebody's life better, how do they turn that into something concrete that they can articulate? How do they turn it into a habit? What is that process of going from Neo waking up and realizing that he can do something to actually dodging bullets. I think one of the things is the way that we approach time. This is something that almost no one talks about anymore.

49:25So I feel like you may be behind. You may actually be behind your destiny right now. Like maybe you're not on pace. In fact, I think most people watching this, listening, will say, I am behind on achieving my destiny. I'm not exactly sure what it is, but I feel like it's slipping. I feel like I'm behind. So you better figure out time differently. and you can bend and manipulate time to your advantage. The most stupid, antiquated, ridiculous concept on planet Earth today very well may be that a day is 24 hours. It's so stupid. It's the dumbest thing ever. 24-hour days were contrived when there were no cars.

50:03There was no electricity. If I wanted to get you a message, I had to write something down if I could, send it on a horseback, hope you get it. That's insane. Never mind the internet. So it used to take hours days weeks months years to do can be done now in a millisecond in the internet or on our smartphones Yet we measure the time the same way that guy did that's bananas. That is so stupid yet everybody does it And so I about 25 years ago when I'm not the most talented I'm not the smartest and I'm really not and you've had guests on your show with IQs Maybe a hundred points higher than mine. This is the truth.

50:35I know a couple of them. I had them on my show How in the world? I don't come from you know a whole track record of success, right? I don't have the perfect upbringing. How in the world am I going to win? I got to do things other people aren't willing to do, which I'm doing. That's the one mores. And I got to fix the way I look at time. What would I need to believe about time? What would I need to believe? What would the question be? And so my days now are from 6am to noon. That's a day. It's six hours. And in that day, some days you just chill. But in that day, I'm going to get the amount of productivity, faith, working out, fitness, money, business, you name it, in that day.

51:09We've all had a morning where we go, I got more done this morning than I have in weeks. Well, why can't you do that every morning? So I measure time. I've compressed and condensed time. I've bent it. My day is 6 a.m. to noon, and I'm not crazy. You're crazy for thinking it takes 24 hours, just like some dude in a cave did 300 years ago. That's bananas that you still think that way, and it's unfair that people have taught you this. My second day starts at noon and goes till 6 p.m. That's day two, but what the cool thing is at the end of day one, this clock goes off about noon every day, bro, and goes, what did I just get done?

51:36What didn't I do? What do I need to be accountable for? What do I need to double my efforts? Just like you do at the end of most days, right? And then the next day is 6 p.m. to midnight. And some of those are just fun days. Sundays, I chill, right? But some days, they're really super productive. What I've done now is I have changed a manipulated time. I now get 21 days a week. Stack that up over a month, I'm going to kick your butt. Stack that up over a year, you're toast. Stack it up over five years, my entire our life is different than it would have been otherwise. And if you do this for about 90 of your traditional days that you think are, you will come back to me and go, that profoundly impacted my life.

52:09And here's the other thing that happens. The world responds to you differently when you value your time like that. What is precious is valuable. That's why a diamond or this watch is way more expensive than the piece of paper that's written down there because it's more scarce. When your time, when you interact with the world is slightly more scarce, they respond to you as if you're more valuable. So you get more accountability, more productivity, more fun, more joy, and the world flips its response to you. All of a sudden, you become more valuable and precious to people when your time is different.

52:39And you'll get thousands more days in your life and live a much more blissful and happy life than the person who only gets 24 hours. Yeah. So this is a concept that I really hope people take seriously. So I'm often asked how frequently I evaluate my progress and I'm like that's probably about every three hours and I think people are surprised to hear that it's not daily it's not weekly certainly not monthly or yearly it's like I'm constantly okay was I productive in this period of time yes in the book you reference it if I remember correctly is like squeezing the air out of all those gaps where most people like okay if you know if I get this done in my day then I'm fine and if you took that and made your day those six hours suddenly it's like okay i need to be really efficient what if you took that day tom and then combined it with the power of doing one more of that mindset and then chasing inconvenient things on top of it in those days and on top of that sprinkle the little self-love to make sure that you don't self-love little reticular activating system where we're doing repeated visualizations where we're finding the things in those days that we need to be able to find uh-oh you may just change your life you know i know exactly what happens and you likened this to Kobe Bryant.

53:47And walk people through like, so what Tim Grover has said about like his work ethic and extra practices and stuff. Cause it's like, I don't know how many times the successful people have to say the same things for people to get like, oh, okay, cool. I get where this is going. You know, one really simple thing is this. You need to get in a bigger hurry. If I could just distill it down to something simple, you need to get in a bigger hurry. You're too casual. You're too slow. You walk too slow. You talk too slow. You think in terms of too much time. And if you would just speed up the pace, man, like you know this, when you're around someone like Kobe or Grover or you or anyone that kind of vibrates at a frequency that feels like success energy, it's faster.

54:25They don't have to talk faster. Many of our most favorite people talk much slower than you and I do. But they're just in a little bit of a bigger hurry. I'll give you a Kobe thing that's not in the book, though, but just for me and you and everyone gets to listen. Kobe was scheduled to do my show six days after he passed. Oh, God. and deeper than that i was with kobe the week before he passed away let me tell you the story about this because i think it's pretty profound about the one mores in a volleyball tournament our daughters played volleyball together and um it's if you have a kid who plays volleyball you all are going yep i get what that is these are long days and noisy days so this thing starts It's about 8 a.m.

55:06All the dads are there. The last match was 10 p.m. Oh, God. Yeah, dude. And I'm the last dad in there except this other guy in a black sweatsuit with white stripes on it. And he's about 6 '6". And it's Kobe. And we've been around each other many times at these tournaments. We're the last of the two dads left. And so the tournament ends. His match was on a different end of the court than my daughter's was. Something happened. I have no idea why I did this, brother. I watched him this day. And I was on the other end and I watched him. He had his baby in his left arm, his little one. And he was rubbing the back of his daughter that was playing.

55:44And literally I went, I don't hug Bella enough. Look how affectionate he is. It just stood out to me. And because it stood out to me, his outward affection, I watched him, bro. And I watched Kobe walk out of the gym that day with this baby and his arm around his other one. And I watched him walk out. And he obviously stood out because he was so tall. And I can picture him right now, Tom, walking out of that door for the last time. Six days later, he died. And I wonder, see, if you want to know the power of one more, it's when I take it from you and you can't have it anymore. I wonder if someone would have whispered, Kobe, when he got in the car that day, six more days.

56:26How would that week maybe have been different for him? What would he have said? Who would he have loved? Who would he have reached out to? What would have mattered to him? How about the Saturday before? Kobe, one more day. He's getting on that helicopter. Kobe, one more hour. See, it hits us when I say that. And there's a whisper happening that you can't hear. Tom, eight more years, 18 more years. Whatever it is, there's a whisper. We forget. We're going to die. Napoleon Hill says, begin with the end in mind. What if you did that with your life? What if you began with the end of your life in mind and worked it backwards?

57:11Bro, my favorite thing in the world was to golf with my dad. My favorite thing, man. We're both no good at golf. Post my hero in a golf cart with me for five hours a foot away. And the conversations. Watch my dad walk a car. Do you know what I would do, bro, for one more round of golf with my dad? One more time. Hey, dad, good putt. Yeah, that was a good one, wasn't it? He put his arm on me. High five. You know what I would do for that? how would you act if you started to think about all the elements of your life like Kobe's last six days Kobe's one more day Kobe's one more hour me getting that back with my dad what if you started to look at the relationships you have in your life like it was the last time you had a conversation with him the last time you get to hold Lisa's hand and look in her eyes but how much more precious does she become maybe it's the last podcast the last interview How much more precious would it be?

58:09How much more engaged could we, as engaged as we are? That next meeting, that conversation with, is it Gerson over here, right? That conversation with him, man. See, when we begin to distill downs and we realize, yeah, there's a power to one more because they're not promised how many we have. And so that day with Kobe, it just burned it into my soul, man, when I watched him. And then to see six days later, he was gone. That time with his family was so precious. And so I would just challenge everybody, If you want to know the power of one more, it's when I take it from you. And there's a power and there's a blessing that you get one more in your life.

58:43You're going to get another chance to talk to Lisa. You're going to get another great dinner with her. You're going to get another show. Those listeners have another day to change their life. They have another opportunity to do one more. They have another opportunity to make their family proud of them. They still have more time. They don't just have one more day probably to be the one in their family. Life is beautiful. It's precious. and sometimes we only have an appreciation for it in its absence. Sometimes we only have an appreciation for the power of the one mores or the people in our lives when we imagine their absence.

59:13And so I would just ask everybody to consider that. Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Don't forget to follow the show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. You'll never miss an episode. I want to date with Rawls, Carty says. Rawls? Ruffer ass? This is the love story of real hinge couples written and read by me, Nicola Dinan. Listen to the free audiobook now.

1:00:03Grab a Pepsi Zero Sugar today. That way. All right, welcome back to the show, everybody. So grateful you decided to join me again here this week. And I have some special stuff for you. I've been asked a lot, what are some of the things on peak performance when you work with, you know, elite performers? I've been blessed that over the last 30 years, I've worked with some of the top athletes in the world, CEOs, political figures, and entertainers as well. and what are some of the things that you work with with them that you could teach us on the show and also that you've learned from them through, you know, friendships and coaching them.

1:00:37So I'm going to just share two this week with you because I think they're major. And even if you think you're familiar with these two topics, hang in there with me this week because I'm going to reinforce it on a much deeper level and explain to you that there's levels to this game of success and frankly of life. So the two things we're going to cover this week is repetitions, doing more repetitions, okay? And number two seems uncorrelated, but we're actually going to talk about deadlines and having deadlines in your life. It's two of the biggest things that I work on with the top performers behind the scenes that I coach.

1:01:08And so we're going to get into this week. Before I do it, my team keeps telling me to remind you all of this, that to get on my email list, if you go to edmylet.com, and I think it says join here, just put your email in there. I have nothing to sell you. There's not going to be a funnel you're going to fall into. I just want to be able to communicate with you regularly. We're going to start sending out a newsletter about the shows that come out before they come out, and you'll get early access. So go to edmylett.com and submit your email there, and you'll be grateful that you did. Okay, now let's get into it.

1:01:36So this whole success thing, the difference between winning and losing is so small, it's almost too scary to talk about. It truly is. And the reason that people don't talk about it too much is they don't really know what it is. there's a lot of people unfortunately that are now in the coaching business or personal development that have really never won themselves outside of telling you how to win and so a lot of their information when I listen to it or the successful people that I coach listen to are like what are they talking about and so I want to give you two things that I know definitively work and and this is from my own life and from the lives of the people that I work with and in a minute I'll give you a treat this has been such a passionate topic for me and so fresh on my mind as I was preparing for today's show yesterday, I was working, doing some other recording for something else working.

1:02:21And this concept came up to me and I recorded it out in my backyard, looking at the ocean. And I'm going to throw to that clip in a minute. It's about seven minutes long, because as I was doing it in the moment, the area of that moment, you're like, Hey, I'm going to do this right now because I know later it won't be as good or as fresh. And so I recorded something for all of you yesterday. That's going to be a part of today's podcast. And so if you're on YouTube, it'd be cool. You'll get a chance to see a different view. There's an ocean in the background. If you're on audio. That's okay too.

1:02:44It's going to be still the same information that the people on YouTube are going to get. But here we go. So number one thing is repetitions. I think most people don't really have a concept of how many practice repetitions it takes to get great at something. And in the clip I'm going to show you in a minute, you're going to understand exactly what I'm talking about, why reps matter. And there are levels to this stuff. Let me give you an example of things that would probably blow your mind. I think you all probably know who Steph Curry is. Steph is going to be a Hall of Fame, probably top 10 NBA player of all time.

1:03:14Some people think he's the best player of all time. But he certainly knows the best shooter of all time in the history of the NBA. Went to Davidson College. This is not a guy that went to a big-time school. He was not heavily recruited. And even out of college, he was small. So a lot of people wasn't sure whether or not he was going to make a great NBA player. And his dad, Dale Curry, was an NBA player. And even with having that pedigree, people doubted this kid. Now he's the greatest shooter, and it's not even arguable, of all time in the history of the NBA. But why is that? Because a lot of guys in the NBA are great shooters.

1:03:44A lot of them have a talent for it. A lot of them practice a lot too, right? Practice and doing repetitions. You don't get to the NBA with a lot of repetitions. But even in the NBA, there are levels to this game. Listen to this. To this day, Steph Curry takes 500 practice shots a day. 500. That's 3 ,500 a week, 14 ,000 a month, 168 ,000 practice shots a year. And now it's almost 2.8 million practice shots in his career. Think about that just for a second. Now, wouldn't it be easy for Steph Curry to go, I already know how to shoot. I've already made a lot of shots in my life. What's the point of me doing more and more of this?

1:04:24It's monotonous. I'm already good at it. It's just routine. And that's what you think with your sales presentation. That's what you think with your phone calls. That's what you think about everything in your life. And too many of you have set a standard for yourself that It's just as good as you already are. But Steph Curry knows that the more and more he does this reflexively, then he can operate under pressure. Then he can operate when he's fatigued. It's one thing to shoot shots. I was listening to his video of another great shooter named Ray Allen. And he said, man, I didn't just jump and shoot because in a normal game, I'm running up and down the floor.

1:04:54He goes, I watch a lot of guys do practice shots. They barely get their feet off the floor an inch or two. I take a full shot, jump just as high on my practice shot as I do on a game shot because I'm going to be that much higher off the ground when I shoot. so a lot of guys practice they make their 100 practice shots but it's not at full speed it's not under the same amount of pressure Steph Curry does 500 a day and he's already the greatest he's already made millions of shots and he keeps doing more of it because there's levels to greatness just get this straight greatness always rises to the top if you feel under recognized right now underappreciated at your job just realize this if you're great they eventually find you Success eventually finds you.

1:05:36If you want to be a millionaire in whatever your business is, you have to be outstanding at it. You can't be just the best person in your office or in your town. You got to be the best in the industry. And the best is not more talented. The best does more reps, repetitions. Tiger Woods was known to hit around 1 ,000 golf balls per day in his prime. He was obsessed with practicing. He would practice over 10 hours a day on the practice range. He would practice up to 10 hours a day. And he was already Tiger Woods. Think about this just for a second. A thousand shots a day. He'd say a thousand contacts a day.

1:06:12He was already Tiger Woods. He'd already won all these golf tournaments. He was already known as the one or two best players in the world. But there's levels to this game. That's how he dominated. See, it's one thing to win for a year or two years. But to dominate for a decade. Do you know that I know a lot of people that were successful in business for a year or two or three that are now broke? Or that used to be wealthy and not anymore? because when they got to a decent level, they stopped refining their game. They stopped doing the reps. Listen to me, please. Most of you that even have some momentum right now, you take for granted the game.

1:06:45Do you have any reps and hours I put in to do a podcast like this? I'm going to talk about it when the video comes back to me. I've done thousands of hours on camera, thousands of hours on stage, and I still practice and practice and practice because I know there's levels to this game. Let me tell you a fascinating story. About four years ago, a very, I'll just tell you, Adele bought a home where I lived and she lived kind of across the fairway at this golf course from me. And I didn't know that she had bought the house. And I woke up one night, it was like two o 'clock in the morning and I'm hearing all this music.

1:07:18It was blaring across the fairway into my backyard and I was really upset. I'm like, I got to sleep, right? So I go into the backyard and I listened for a few minutes and then it was not great music. It was karaoke. And I'm like, I'm not going to listen to this for the next two or three hours. I got to sleep. And so I actually got dressed and I started to drive over to her house, not knowing that it was her house yet. Cause she had just moved in. In fact, it was her birthday. And, um, all of a sudden the music changed and like a voice of an angel started singing. I mean, like of an angel and it was Adele.

1:07:55And I start listening to this and I stop, I go, I'm about to get a 30 minute concert from Adele in my own backyard. It was the coolest thing ever. And I just listened to this beautiful voice and I was so glad I didn't go over and ask him to stop. And the next morning at breakfast, I saw her there and I said, I just got to tell you something. I was almost in your backyard. She goes, well, actually one of the other neighbors did come over. And I said, it was just so great to hear your voice. And I said, I'm just curious, like, how often do you practice? Let me tell you what she told me. I wanted to make sure I wrote this down.

1:08:26She said, well, I'm about to do a Vegas residency soon. And me and my team will put in over 2 ,400 hours of reps and practice before we have the first show. And she said, I'll probably sing the average song there. I wrote it down here. At least 100 hours each, probably. she's already Adele she's already refining her craft because she knows under pressure when the crowd's bigger she's not feeling well or she's tired she still wants to be at her best see most people just have a standard of I want to get pretty good and then on their good day they're good but how are you on your bad day how are you when you're sick how are you when you're tired how are you when you're stressed how are you when you've had a fight with your spouse how are you when it's a really big appointment or an important one.

1:09:13And so I don't know, Tiger Woods does it, Steph Curry does it, Adele does it. You could argue these are three of the goats of all time in their industry, and I could keep naming people for you if you want. But hopefully that sets the stage for repetitions. Whatever you think is enough, it's not. You got to do more. And I address more in this video. I'm going to throw it to the video in my backyard I recorded yesterday because I can't do it this well again. So here we go. Listen to this. So this week we're going going to talk about two things, repetition and deadlines. And these have been two things in, you know, in my career that have become benchmarks of success that are kind of secrets.

1:09:47I was speaking this weekend in, uh, in Dallas for a friend of mine, Kent Clo there. And in the green room, there were several people in there, very complimentary that, you know, I was their, you know, best speaker they've seen in their life and nice things. And the guy said to me, he said, Hey man, like, you know, and I've watched you, I've come to this group, this particular group that I spoke to, I've spoken to them about every three years he brings me in. And it's a different message over the three years, actually completely different six years ago, three years ago. And then this year. And he said, like, he was like, I just feel like you're getting better and better, which is a great compliment to hear.

1:10:19I just, you know, love hearing that. I don't know if it's true or not, but I love hearing it. And I said, well, one of the things, man, is I'm crazy about getting my reps, my reps in my repetition. One of the reasons I do speak so much is it keeps me sharp and I keep getting better. You do something enough times over and over and over again. If you're smart, you're learning from each experience. You're taking notes. What worked? What didn't? What setup didn't work? What conclusion didn't? How can I tie it down different? Maybe it's the sequencing. Maybe something I think is going to work on stage doesn't work at all.

1:10:47But I said, I only know this because I've done hundreds, if not thousands, of reps on stage. And the reason that I still speak, people say to me often, like, why do you still travel so much and speak? I'm paid when I do it, but it's certainly not something that I need to be doing. I really do it, A, because it's not work to me and I feel like I'm making a difference when I do it and I'm having a sense of contribution. The second reason is, and I talk oftentimes about this with a lot of my comedian friends, I don't want to lose my edge. I want to keep expanding and keep growing. And the more speaking I do, the better I get as long as I'm taking lessons every time I do it.

1:11:20Well, this is true for you in your craft. You've got to do more reps, not only because you're going to have a higher propensity of getting more accounts, more clients, more whatever, but you're going to get better. Most people aren't doing enough reps at whatever their chosen craft is. My son asks me all the time in golf, Dad, what do you think I'm not doing that I need to? More reps, more reps, more reps. And I know people will tell you often in personal development, well, more isn't always better. Well, that's probably true to some extent in some things. But overall, more is better. And it's not just better because you're putting more out there with more chances to win, but you are getting better.

1:11:55and anybody that you've ever seen in your life, if you watch them over one year, three years, five years, they get better. You got to get great. The people that get wealthy in this world, they get great at what they do. Whatever they do, they're great. And so you got to do more reps. I want to challenge you this week, more context, more calls, more zooms, more whatever it is that you do. And then from each experience deduce what worked, what didn't and expand and improve from This is really important. Like, I think many of you have seen me speak on stage, for example, and you think, man, this is like, you know, if you think I'm decent at it, my gosh, like he just walks out there and does it.

1:12:32Well, I don't. I've just walked out there and done it thousands of times. And when I do it, I am, I reflect afterwards. I have some introspection. What, what did I enjoy about it? What didn't I enjoy? There are things that I regularly think, oh, the crowd's going to love this one. And then they don't, or it doesn't hit or the sequence is wrong. my stand-up friends when you watch a stand-up special on like Netflix for example or you know Amazon my friends have put those specials on whether it's Sebastian Maniscalco or Jeff Foxworthy or Nikki Glaser or Whitney Cummings or whatever Nate Bergazzi whatever comedian you see you understand they've been doing that routine for several years before they film the special oftentimes it's usually about two years in between specials and they start with new content two years They've told every one of those jokes with a different pause, a different nuance, a different setup to get it so dialed in.

1:13:23And these are the best in the world. And they won't record it for two years. Sometimes Rogan just went, I think, four years in between specials. And it's only for an hour of content. They want to get the reps in, the reps in, the reps in under different conditions, different circumstances, like small crowds, big crowds. And in your case, friendly clients, not so friendly clients, like over and over and over. Then you get great. Then it's almost automatic. And then you become more impactful. So more reps at whatever you do. The second thing is deadlines. I'm kind of a psycho about it. And not enough people have deadlines on what they want to get done.

1:13:58For example, many of you know I'm developing the houses on my island. And one of the mistakes I made is I did not give them a deadline on when they were going to be finished. So they're just getting done whenever they do. And not only is it taking longer than it needs to take, they're missing the rhythm of success. Successful people have a pace, an urgency, a speed to them that's unnoticed by the naked eye, but it's critical. And the only way that you find that pace is if everything has a deadline. So if you're going to make 10 contacts today, by what time? Not just 10 contacts. Don't lollygag the 10 throughout the day.

1:14:27By what time? If you've got a money goal for the month, by what date? If you've got a weight loss goal, by what date, what specific amount of weight? About everything I have has a deadline to it. this video that I'm recording right now, I had a deadline set for when it had to be recorded by for me. And it's moved me toward, you know, what started to happen. I knew the deadline was coming. My mind started working on what I wanted to say. I started processing the information sooner. I knew it was coming. And so I've worked on this like three or four times over the last three or four days, as opposed to, Oh, I'll just wing it.

1:14:58Let me knock out a video. So deadlines create urgency. They create the right pace, but they also trigger your subconscious mind, particularly your unconscious mind starts to go to work on whatever it is you're going to do when a deadline's attached to it. And it doesn't do that if there's no deadline. So let's just say, for example, I had a presentation I wanted to have completed by. If I don't set a deadline to it, it does not go to the unconscious file to start working on it. But when I go, I have to have that presentation ready by Thursday at 3 p.m. This clock starts ticking in your unconscious.

1:15:29And now you begin to create all and pull from all the resources of your unconscious and subconscious mind to start working on that presentation, even though you may not have consciously started working on it, because there's a deadline attached, the big parts of your brain go to work on something. Isn't that powerful? A lot of data tells us this lately. By simply attaching a deadline, your subconscious and unconscious mind starts to go to work on making that thing great, even though you haven't consciously worked on it. And you rob yourself from all the benefits of memory, of cadence, of pulling those files up, of references, all the power of your spirit and your being.

1:16:07You rob yourself of all of that simply because there's no deadline attached because it doesn't move the file up in your subconscious mind to go to work on it. I don't exactly understand how that works, but I know that it does. You know that it does too. You ever have to get up really early in the morning beyond your normal time? You realize that isn't it more difficult to sleep those nights because your mind's like, I got to get up at four. I got to get up at four. It's going to work on getting up, which isn't good for your sleep because there's a deadline set on it. The deadline makes you more productive, gives you the speed and urgency that you need to get something done.

1:16:38So now you're in the rhythm and pace of success. But that's the other part. The invisible part is your mind's going to work on making it great, even though you consciously have them. All right, everybody, repetitions and deadline this week. All right, so there you have it. So listen, I wanted to play that for you because I wanted you to have some understanding. And the other thing about repetitions, and then I'm going to talk about the mind because I use some terms, their subconscious and unconscious mind. And I want to make some distinctions for you about those two things because they are slightly different in my opinion.

1:17:04But one thing about reps, just like for this podcast, for example, you guys, you know, I could mail in these podcasts when I do them. And I think my producer will tell you that, you know, most people have a producer that writes everything for them. And I write every one of these shows. All of the content you're seeing here today did not come from a producer came from me. I don't have somebody write my scripts. When I have someone come on the podcast, I do have a producer do a cursory review, but I try my best every time to put two to three hours into every single podcast, sometimes five and seven hours when I'm interviewing somebody.

1:17:37I'll watch other interviews of theirs. I'll read the book if I have the time to do it. You know, I've been a guest on hundreds of podcasts and it's blown me away over the years, the discrepancy and preparation level. And so I think when you see somebody do something, whether they're speaking on stage or they're great at sales or they close well you know they're persuasive or a podcast like this you think well they're probably pretty natural at it well yeah there's three stages of progress in life i've covered this on a podcast a long time ago but the three stages are the awkward stage awkward is where you just knew it something and you're terrible at it right you're just not any good at it because you're new at it and when you do enough enough repetitions you move from awkward to what i call mechanical and it's kind of where you kind of know the words you know the structure it's pretty darn good, but it's still kind of, you know, hit and miss.

1:18:24It looks a little machinist. It looks a little rehearsed. It doesn't seem, what is step three? The natural stage. And the natural stage is it just looks like these people were born to do it. It's easy for them. They roll out of bed and it's a cakewalk. And then there's levels to natural. See, a great high school shooter looks pretty natural when you go to high school and you go, well, that kid's the best kid. Then when you go to division one college, that's the best kid. And then when you go to the NBA, they can all have a natural shot and then there's Steph Curry. And I know from golf, having a son who's a professional golfer, you know, you go to an average golf tournament, you can find the two or three kids who look a little bit awkward.

1:18:57Or maybe they have a mechanical golf swing. And then there's the two or three that are natural. And you go, that's a natural. Well, no, you just got more reps and more productive reps, more correct reps. And then even from there, then there's Tiger Woods. And that's a whole different level from the best of all time. And so these reps matter. I just want to challenge you to be doing more of it by the way it makes you more comfortable it takes away your nervousness you operate well under pressure we always operate reflexively to our habits under pressure and if you haven't practiced what's incredible to me is that people just lose the stomach for it and here's why it's boring it's monotonous unless you're trying to learn when i get off stage you guys anytime you've seen me speak one thing i won't that you wouldn't see is i immediately go through it's borderline self-loathing i've had other speakers even pastors and i discuss this But like when I get off the stage, my mind immediately goes into what could I have done better?

1:19:50What worked? What didn't work? What did I forget to say? How did I miss that moment? Man, I talked right over the applause or I hesitated there. And I go into this mode where most speakers, just so you know, when they walk off stage, if you wonder what they're actually doing, they're asking the mic, they're asking the AV people, did I do okay? When they go back to the green room, did I do all right? When a singer walks off stage and they seem so confident, they killed it. Was I okay tonight? They immediately become insecure my stand-up comedian friends almost every single one when they're done bro I messed the third joke up.

1:20:20Can you believe man? Was it all right? Did they catch it? So everyone looks confident up there right when they get back the great ones are in self-reflection They're in awareness. They audit the performance. They learn from it. They get better I'm, so addicted to that that i've been speaking on stage for 30 years I've been fortunate that i've been picked the number one speaker in the world now three of the last four years And I don't that's all a matter of opinion. It's nice to be acknowledged for it but I certainly don't feel like it. If you knew how much beating of myself up I do, when every podcast is done, the first thing I say to my producer is, was that okay?

1:20:54And he's nodding and laughing right now. I guarantee you, right? Because it's the first thing I say. And then I'll go through for hours afterwards in my mind, what I could have done better, how I should have said this. Oh my gosh, I hesitated there. You think, is it that important? Yeah, because it's my craft. It's my form of expression. I think if you started to look at your career, whether you're a custodian, a janitor, a flight attendant, an entrepreneur, a school teacher, a police officer, you play the piano, whatever it is, what if you started to look at your career like you were an NBA athlete, like you were Tiger Woods, like you were an artist like Adele, that it's your form of expression.

1:21:33Steph Curry's form of expression is basketball. Tiger Woods' way of expressing his genius and his greatness was in his golf. Adele's greatness and genius is through her music. Well, in my way, it's my speaking. It's my content. It's my work. Have you ever been on a flight with like an exceptional flight attendant? Like an exceptional one. They bring a joy, an effort, a professionalism, an attention to detail, a standard that's meticulous. And you notice it. I always tell them. Or a server in a restaurant. You've had hundreds of servers, haven't you? Then there's those two or three special ones.

1:22:12Have you ever had anybody do any work on your home? You know, a lot of people do work on your home. And then there's the one and they just take pride in it. And they're good at it. And they've got this mix of confidence and humility. They're confident they're really good, but humility that they want to get better. That's the nuance of success. And I don't want you to miss this. You've got to be great. Don't let everybody out there tell you you're awesome as you are. Would you say that to your kids if they were bringing home D's and they could get A's? You would never say that to them. And by the way, you don't even believe it anyway.

1:22:45Because you know you were born to do something great. I look at you, I look at my friends like I believe in you so much, I see the best version of you, not the current one. Now I love the current one, but I know there's another version. And I don't accept the one in front of me if there's one that could be better. I don't accept an 8 out of 10 speech for me if a 10 was my capacity. that's the point i guarantee you those thousand shots that tiger woods hit we're with focus we're with reflection we're with adjustments afterwards that's what makes it worth it every shot's different that steph curry takes every note's different for adele every time she's learning more about her voice and her nuances she's also told me that sometimes when she's singing a particular song, lyrics for another one come to her.

1:23:33So why is that? Well, now we're going to talk about something that I covered in the video there. What is the difference, by the way? Because it's conflated stuff. And there's even a debate that they even exist, by the way, the subconscious and unconscious mind. But is there a difference? Because Freud actually, for a long time, Freud thought they were the same thing. And then he kind of evolved his thinking. And to me, there's a little bit of a difference between the subconscious and the unconscious. We know what the conscious mind is. We all know what that is. But the subconscious, when we talk about the idea of deadlines now, as we shift into that concept, what the subconscious does is it has automatic actions like breathing and heart rate.

1:24:09It does that for you. It regulates your daily life. It can be identified when you're introspective. It stores memories, beliefs, and experiences. It can be identified through introspection, as I've said, but it can also protect you from sensory overload. It's almost like the subconscious mind is almost like an operating system running in the background. And when you have a deadline you set on something, which was part two, it enrolls a part of your mind that's not enrolled when there's no deadline. And that's why, like I said, when you got to get up early in the morning or even right now, if you have something major coming up or you have before, like you have a due date and you're pregnant, what it does is it starts to cause you to flash forward to that day and the aftermath and the preparation for it.

1:24:53Getting the room ready for the baby, having a stroller in place. You start to do things when there's a deadline or a due date. If you've got a big presentation coming up in the next few weeks, your mind thinks about it and starts to work on it, doesn't it? Or you've got a party you're planning or you ever have before. Your mind's working on it even when you're not. That's what the subconscious mind does. And you only enroll that part of your brain when you put a deadline on something. That's why repetitions and deadlines matter. The unconscious mind includes thoughts, memories, desires that aren't consciously known.

1:25:25And when you set a deadline for something, you begin to pull from thoughts that you don't have consciously, memories of previous successes or failures that serve you in the new one with the new deadline, and new dreams and desires that could be somehow correlated as a vertical or something connected to this thing you've got that a deadline's on. You can also have socially unacceptable ideas, wishes, and desires that are just there in your unconscious. Your unconscious also has traumatic memories and painful emotions. The unconscious mind has automatic responses and reflexes like breathing and digestion in it.

1:26:03And it's not something you can just summon on cue, but when you put a deadline to it, you can. The reason that this matters is your brain is constantly trying to conserve energy. So when you come up with a goal or an idea or a to-do list of things you need to do Your brain immediately does not want you to put a deadline on it because then if you put a deadline on it It can't save energy. It's constantly trying to get you to avoid deadlines I'll get around to it. It doesn't matter as long as I get all 10 done today Who cares by when it doesn't matter if I do my homework as long as you know, I get it done But when you put a deadline your brain tries to resist it because your brain's like ah now I can't hide from you and then you flipped on your subconscious and unconscious mind and now it's taking energy.

1:26:45That brain of yours is constantly trying to avoid you and to get you to avoid deadlines because it doesn't want to enroll the part of the mind that then requires energy from it. It's an energy saver. It's so lazy, it's crazy. And so that's why there's such massive power to deadlines beyond you'll hurry up, beyond the pace that I said, the rhythm and pace of success, beyond that. You've enrolled and enlisted a part of your brain that isn't enrolled if there's no deadline attached to it. Does that make sense to everybody? And so if that does make sense to you, here's the key benefits of some deadlines, okay?

1:27:19Number one, the pressure of an approaching deadline can push you to work harder and faster to achieve the goal. By the way, what's great about that is then you've knocked that out. You can be on to the next thing. I think when I said earlier there's levels to this thing with the repetition, there's also levels to the pace. They're just levels of the pace. there is typically an impatience to most successful people. And I know patience is a virtue, and I'd even in my life like to have more of it. But I have to be really candid with you. The standard for speed with the ultra successful is different than the other people that don't win.

1:27:59It's invisible. You probably wouldn't know it. But when you were around them, they even seem a little pushy. Some people would call them demanding. and this is why as a leader, if you're leading people, you've got to have deadlines and you've got to focus on the reps and you've got to focus on speed. The key benefits of this is it does put some pressure on people. Pressure is good. Pressure is a privilege. Remember this, the separation is in the preparation. I don't separate myself when I get on stage. I separated myself before I ever got there. I don't separate myself doing a podcast like this.

1:28:32I separate myself before I ever got there. Tiger Woods didn't separate himself necessarily on the golf course. It was before he got there. Adele doesn't separate herself on stage. It's before she gets there. Steph Curry, before he takes the court. For you, it's the before. And this is the stuff that you'll never see on Instagram. It's not sexy. It's not beautiful. It's what you do when nobody's watching that matters the most, not when they are watching. If you do the right things when nobody is watching, you will shine when everybody is watching. That's the irony. Deadlines help with prioritization, getting things in sequence.

1:29:06Sometimes stuff needs to move in front of other things sequentially. And when you have a deadline, it puts in priority the sequence of things. It can help people identify the most important tasks in your company. You don't have enough deadlines. I'm not talking about month long. I'm talking about hours long. Hey, 10 contacts by noon, five of these by then three zooms by this, right? Like deadlines. I know this isn't like glamorous. It's not the same as what I'm talking about breathing or walking on the beach. You know, people love those. But when it comes to the work in life, most people start to, this is low vibration, man.

1:29:39I don't know if I want to know all this, but yet you want to be a millionaire yet. You want to win. Do you want me to talk to you as a friend? Do you want me to give you the real stuff? Cause you can just come to my content every week and I can just make you feel good. And I do that a lot because I think life is about that. But then there's times where we have to look at each other, friend to friend here, mentor to mentee and say, Hey, let's go. Let's get this together, man. There's another level, my friend. Sister, you know there's another level. You can feel it. Improved planning happens when you set deadlines.

1:30:10Deadlines force individuals to think through steps they need to complete in a task and use their time effectively. Deadlines create accountability, both for who you are working with and for yourself. When a deadline is set, people are held accountable for meeting their commitments, and this shifts the company. When you want to shift the energy of your church, your Boy Scout troop, your Girl Scout troop, the scouts, whatever they're called now, a business, a family, you put deadlines on things. Right? Hey, we're gonna take a family vacation this summer. Hey, mom, dad, when's it going to be planned by?

1:30:41Where are we going? What are the dates? It also facilitates collaboration. Deadlines can help teams stay aligned and work together towards a common goal. It also does something that I call early issue identification. By setting deadlines, potential issues, challenges, and problems get identified sooner in the process, which allows you to make adjustments that don't happen when there's no deadline. Then you get caught last minute. Oh my gosh, this happened. Oh my gosh, that. I'll give you an example. Today, today, I was supposed to do another podcast with a guest today. They were going to be in their home.

1:31:15There's an issue with their roof and they can't do it because of the noise going on. But because I have deadlines on how many shows I have to get in by when, we're okay with that. But can you imagine if there was no deadline and that podcast, I needed to be released next week to 10 million people like we do every week, and there was no deadline on the other ones, then this problem comes up, we'd be in big trouble. But right now we're good because we've identified the potential problem well in advance, rescheduled it. That's because there was a deadline. And so this is because it forces the brain, as I've said, to use energy immediately.

1:31:47So your brain's going to resist this stuff. So you've got to resist all of it. So listen to me. Last thing I'll tell you. You deserve to win. You do. And I think you're much closer than it might seem. For most of you, it's not a major overhaul in your life or your approach to your business or your life that's required. It's a simple, small, fine-tuning, like a little carburetor adjustment on an old car. See, the world would convince you you're either on it all the way or you're miles away. I don't think you're miles away. In fact, I know you're not. You wouldn't be listening to me today or watching me today if you were miles off.

1:32:31You're not miles off. That's the enemy trying to get you to believe that. The truth is, and I've said this many times in my book, The Power of One More, which is sitting right here. Now it's up straight. You're one decision away. or one new action, one new adjustment, one new contact, one new relationship, one new thought, one new idea, one new deadline away. You know what happens when you shoot all those reps, all those shots? When you're in a slump, you find the adjustment. You go, my elbow was too far out. I got it. Because not only are you doing the reps, you're evaluating it and making adjustments as you go.

1:33:09You're much closer than you think. Trust me. I know it seems miles away. I know it seems like it's never going to happen for someone like you. Let me let you know something on the inside. I thought the same thing about my life. Most of the people you admire went through that same self-doubt, went through that same idea of, man, this is not me. This happens to other people. I keep doing this and it's not happening. I'm telling you that if you'll begin to do the two things we talked about today, it may be for you the one thing you need to change. And what I'm going to do every single week on this show is I'm going to keep bringing you ideas that work, strategies that work, inspiration that moves you every single week on the show.

1:33:51And the reason that I do it, I have to oftentimes reflect on. And the reason that I do it is I so deeply believe the world needs you. I don't believe the world is going to change because of a political movement. I believe the world changes from a grassroots revolution of good people making a difference in other people's lives in their core genius way. If that's a great flight attendant, a great astronaut, a great scientist, a great doctor, a great teacher, a great salesperson, a great mom, a great business leader, a great singer. I just believe the world's better when people are at the highest expression of themselves and expanding all the time in their life.

1:34:34Big believer in you, my brother or sister. Big believer in you. If today helped you, set a deadline of the next two minutes to share this episode with somebody. And maybe you need to listen to or watch it twice. That would be the repetitions that might serve you. Thank you.

1:35:23It's a collection of real love stories about five couples that met on Hinge. The stories are written and read by Tembi Dinton Hurst, Nicola Dinan, Curtis Garner, Raven Smith, and Rufy Thorpe. I, Hunter Harris, wrote and read the foreword. The audiobook's out now. Give it a listen. This episode is brought to you by ChatGPT. Hey, it's Bill Simmons from the Bill Simmons Podcast. Have you guys heard about ChatGPT work? It's the new way to use ChatGPT for bigger multi-step projects. And when you need more than just answers, give ChatGPT work access to your apps and files, and it can create real work documents like spreadsheets, slides, and structured reports.

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