Riding the Giant Waves of Belief with Garrett & Nicole McNamara

0:28So, hey, guys, are you frustrated with where you're at right now?

0:33this is the admired show all right welcome back to the show everybody so i was just telling them off camera my number one guest i wanted on the show this year is this couple and the reason is is it's very unique in life that you get a chance to talk to human beings who have done things that basically no other human beings have ever done before or at least very very few and in their case that is 100 % true. And also their show's awesome. I've been watching the show 100 Foot Wave. It's coming up on its third season now on HBO Max. But here's the deal, everybody. He has ridden the biggest wave in the history of mankind.

1:12She is the brains and the security behind the operation. And frankly, as I look at their content, she has so many special things to share with you today about success and belief. And I just think they're two of the most unique, remarkable people in the world coming to you today from Italy on their way to Switzerland. Garrett and Nicole McNamara, thank you for being here today. It's an honor and we're really excited. So thank you for the invitation. Well, I've never had such a powerful, good intro. Thank you. That made me feel very special. Well, it's actually true. It's actually true. So guys, I just want to picture this.

1:50Picture like an 85. We'll put it on the YouTube version. It's a picture like an 85, 90 foot wave. And this man has ridden it. It's just, it's just unbelievable to me what they do with their life. But as I was diving into you guys, I'm going to be honest with you, Garrett. I'm watching a lot of the things Nicole says, and I'm writing them down a little bit more. I mean, what you do blows my mind, right? But when I started to listen to your wife, I'm like, oh my gosh, she has a career like in my industry as well. So to do something great with your life, no matter what it is, all of you listening to today, if you have a dream, I think you have to start with some level of belief in the cause.

2:24Watching this thing you said, if you could just give me your opinion about this, but you're talking about how really the world today is trying to sort of rob us almost of trying to live our authentic self and our dreams. I literally played it three times in a row and then I played it for my daughter. So talk a little bit just about belief and how that's the foundation to do anything like what you guys are doing. You know, there's so many components to breaking free. And I think that's what it is. It's like breaking free and having the confidence to be our authentic self, to tap back into our authentic selves.

2:59Because from the moment we are born, we become conditioned to fit in, to fit into society. Like, oh, you have to do this to succeed. You have to do this to get you. But that's really not the case because then you're just going to be the cookie cutter, fit in the box. And, um, you know, that's where society really wants us. Uh, so to break free, you have to have the courage. And what I've realized is you have to be able to be uncomfortable because it's uncomfortable to go against what society is telling you you need to do. And it can be scary. So you also have to be fearless because the way we're kept small is by our fear, fear of not being loved, fear of not succeeding, fear of failing.

3:58So if we can be okay with being uncomfortable and fearlessly go into something with our authentic self. And when you are your authentic self, you don't give up because if you're really doing something authentically, you just keep going until you make it happen. It's actually natural and effortless ease. Yeah. And I mean, we've, we were in a position where it's like, when you know it in your bones, no matter how many people tell you it's not possible you still know in your bones that it is possible so you really have to be committed yeah you just have to you know they either jump on the boat or they stay on shore or get left in the way and that's the thing it's really also surrounding yourself with people who believe in you.

4:54If you are around somebody that says, Oh, that's not possible or that's too hard. They are not part of your success or support team. And the only way you're going to succeed is if you are completely surrounded with people that believe everything is possible and believe in you. So good. You, you do do things though, that like no one has ever done Garrett. Like, So we're talking about fear. Nicole mentions fear. I'm just curious. I look at these videos of you, brother, and I'm just like, what? Like, I'm in a six-foot wave body surfing, and my heart rate's like 150. This man's on 80-plus-foot waves.

5:38Do you still get scared? Or do you rely on your preparation and what Nicole's doing behind the scenes? Or is it like, oh, my gosh, I'm living my dream. I'm exhilarated. Or are you afraid when you're catching a wave like that? Like what's going on in your body and your biochemistry and your mind? Well, before 2016, I didn't have fear at all. And since then, since I had so much pain from my shoulder, I'm choosing to be afraid. Fear is something I feel we choose. We manufacture in our mind when we think about the past or the future. And we're not in the moment fully enjoying the moment, doing our best in the moment.

6:17And since I had this bad injury, I've been choosing to go back into the pain that I experienced for so long. And I also haven't gotten myself physically prepared to where I used to be. So, yeah, I'm choosing to be – I haven't rode very many giant waves. I have had a few, and I've had a few major wipeouts on giant waves, and I was afraid I wasn't going to enjoy it anymore. And I still enjoy getting pounded. I still enjoy the underwater ride. I've just been a lot more, what would I say, patient, a lot more patience now. Do I have it right that when you were 35, you kind of quit the dream? Like, tell me if I'm wrong about this.

7:01About, you know, that age where, to be honest with you, most people quit their dream. When they're in their 20s, they're going to try really hard at whatever it is, their business, their music, whatever it is. and then enough rejection or enough fear. In your case, you can describe whatever it was. And so you kind of check out and go get a surf shop for a few years, right? So what was that like? And then what was the switch to go, nope, I'm going to be back in this when the end of my life's over, I maxed it out type life. Evidently, you chose, both of you. Well, when it comes to surfing, your career is pretty much over at like 30, 35 usually.

7:36Yeah. And I was so grateful that I'd been able to surf up until that point. And I thought to myself, man, I should be so grateful. I can go do a nine to five. I can go do whatever it takes to keep putting foot on the table besides surfing and, you know, do what you're supposed to do. and uh i did i opened the store i'm driving to the store one morning actually every morning i was around the store but this one particular morning i looked out and my favorite way was perfect and i'm driving by and i just got really depressed and you know i really did give up on my dreams and open that store and driving by as i was getting depressed i thought to myself oh how do i figure out how to keep surfing i got to give surfing one more chance and i went to the store that morning got out a piece of paper and wrote a business plan to keep surfing what was in the business plan well the the two things that i had to do was win the eddie cow which was in my backyard i lived closer than everybody to the to the actual event location and win the jaws contest and then I'd train, train and eat perfect and manifest.

8:47And I put those, that business plan on the refrigerator, in my car and on the bathroom mirror. And so every day, all day, I looked at it. Anything that I wasn't doing that wasn't on the plan took me further from accomplishing the goal. So I really just focused on what was on that paper all day, every day. Nicole, I heard you talk about manifesting before too. Like it's one of like in my space, it's a pretty overused term. Right. And misunderstood probably by most people. So what does it mean? Like, obviously, you're part of the planning process, the security, the safety. He's out there doing his thing.

9:29There's a dream or a goal. You go, OK, we're going to go to Nazare and there's going to be this big wave or whatever it is. What is what is manifesting like for you when someone says that? What's it mean to you? it's it's creating your own reality it's taking control of your life and i think if we all were taught in school in kindergarten that we were a hundred percent each and every one of us pure potential we can create anything we want everything we think we are creating Every thought is creating our reality. And that's really essentially manifestation. So when you can know that in every cell of your being as a truth, because that's the thing, you have to believe it to be true.

10:19People can tell you it a million times, but unless you truly believe that you are pure potential and every thought creates your reality, it's not going to work. but if you do you're going to see your life unfold magically in front of you so the crazy thing for me is somehow i naturally started doing it without being told that it was a thing or knowing it was a thing and i want to say i don't know around 25 30 i saw the the movie the secret remember that movie but i don't know when it came out when i finally got to see it and i was just It's like, that's what I'm doing. That's what I've been doing.

11:01This is a real thing. This is a thing. And so I just kept doing it even more. Wow. I told you all, it's going to be mind blowing. Just so you all know, I'll give you a little inside scoop. We have major technical issues today. And I wanted to do this so badly with these guys because, listen, there are people that give great speeches or write great books. And there's so much value in that. Then there's very there are people who actually live this stuff and do it like it's who they actually are And that's these two

11:37So hey guys, as you know, i've partnered up with my good friend brennan brouchard Who's created the greatest personal development system that has ever been designed called growth day There's everything from journaling to accountability programs live messages every monday from myself and other influencers There's an opportunity for you to get courses that would cost thousands of dollars completely for free It's incredible. Go to growthday.com forward slash ed and check it out. I wanted to ask you, because Nicole, you're talking about, you know, like getting culture conditions us to conform, right?

12:12To conform. And I actually given this talk right now where I talk about, I think it starts when you're a kid, when you're taught to color within the lines in your coloring books. And I think most of us are conditioned by the time we're six, eight, nine years old to color our life within the lines. Don't go outside the lines. You're a bad boy. You're a bad girl. That's where all the danger is. Yeah. And it seems to me the people that live the most blissful existences are willing to color outside the lines. And I'm not just saying this. When I was writing that talk, I thought of three or four people I was familiar with.

12:45And Garrett and Nicole, you were a couple of them. And but Nicole, I want to ask you about risk because you have a young family. And I think one of the things that holds us back is is also our partner in our life, justifiably being afraid of risk. If you've got a job right now and you're in and let's say the wife has a dream to start a business. But she says, honey, I want to mortgage the house and I want to open up that restaurant or that barbershop or whatever it is. there's a huge risk because it's one thing when you're single and young at one time when Garrett was doing this, right? But it's different when you have a family, your risk is the loss of life for your spouse.

13:26So how do you deal as the partner with the risk element of it? I mean, I think this goes into what I was mentioning a moment ago is that it's really, truly all who we surround ourselves with. And it's that fear because it's actually not a risk. It's a fear. It's a fear that you're not going to succeed. It's not a risk. So if we could live without fear, there's really no risk. Is some of the fear, Nicole, let me ask you, I want to ask you about that. Let's, let's, let's go back and forth on this point. Both of you is some fear healthy though. So do you truly have no fear or is some fear cause you to prepare to some fear cause you to mitigate the risks, um, or maybe to plan more strongly, or do you think that's some different emotion than fear compelling you to do it?

14:22No, I think fear is, is a key component in being able to succeed. Uh, because when the fear arises, you just have to be aware of it and be able to look at it. Okay. like what, what am I actually really afraid of? Like with him riding big waves, am I really afraid that it's that he's going to not come home or like what, what is the fear or you wanting to ride a big wave? Like I know for myself, it's, I just really like to breathe. That's why I'm not going to go surf a gigantic wave, you know? So yeah, you just have to really sit with the fear. Like, the practical example you give of a wife wanting to start this business and it being scary, you know, it being a risk.

15:11It's like, okay, so you're afraid you're going to fail. Okay. If I do fail, what's going to happen? Are we going to really truly end up on the streets or will we figure it out? Because we're a partnership and we support each other. And that's what we do. If we end up failing, we figure it out. You know, our children won't starve. But that goes into the manifestation. You know, it's all interconnected and it's this web. And once you get caught in the web of fear and risk and, you know, trying to stay inside the lines, it's going to keep you trapped. It's a web. So how do you get yourself out and focus on what you do want to happen?

15:52And focusing on what will happen if you do succeed? Like, what if you just focus on succeeding? That's a really interesting point. Like, what if you actually focus on the success part of it? I know you're right. I just, I like the way you say it better than me. You know, when my dad passed away a few years ago, and I've been the blessing, a very good friend of mine's mom passed away last night, actually. And we were talking this morning about this. At the end of life, I don't think you like regret the crashes in the wave. I don't think you regret the times you failed. I do know that at the end of my dad's life who lived a very good life by the way but at the end when we were talking about regrets he it was I wish I'd have started a business when I had the chance I wish I'd have bought that rental property you know I maybe we should have traveled a little bit more you know and so I think at the end of life the regrets are by omission the things you didn't do not the things that you that you didn't fail that necessarily all right Garrett I've always wanted to ask you this so here we go and I know everyone wants to know this what's it feel like man what does it feel like take us into you catch the perfect wave the big wave what what is going on in your soul when that happens well if you're in alignment and everything's lining up and what you've been focusing on for so long comes to you and you're about to ride it it's just following your heart and not thinking and it's spiritual it's blissful it's so beautiful and it's overwhelming with uh endorphins and dopamine at the end um it is like being in heaven you come out and it's just like the best feeling ever and then you want that feeling again and it's funny you you get the best ride of your life and all this and and you want another one what what has to happen in you for it to be the best ride Is it the absence of thought?

17:49Is it being fully present? Is it what is it that happens in you that makes you capable of doing that where I can't or wouldn't at least right now? Well, the fully present part and just feeling your way through it is a big part of it. But the physical and emotional come through putting it all on the line, going as deep as possible to where if you don't make it, this wave is going to eat you. And somehow threading the needle and just getting right into the barrel. and then when you're in the barrel it doesn't seem like you're going to make it but you have to keep processing the positive i'm making it i'm making it no matter how like i can describe one barrel that jaws barrel i came down turned away from the wave so i could get deeper and then turned under the lip and right when i go under the lip the wave hit me three times just kind of kissed me like a little spray of the lip hit my and blinded me so now i pull into the barrel and i can't see i'm blind and i'm feeling myself in this massive cavern so much power so much energy and i'm telling myself you're gonna make it you're gonna make it and i'm starting to get sucked up the face and right and i could feel myself about to fall backwards and i feel the wave backdraft it sucks and then right when i was about to fall it kind of goes silent for a second the backdraft stopped and then this for hurricane force wind comes from behind it's called the spit a compressed wave turns into a compression chamber first it pulls back and then it explodes and it right when i was about to fall the spit the force of the wind picked me up like a hurricane and threw me out in front of the wave and I landed out and then I look up and I'm oh my god oh my god thank you god and it's yeah but that was the most uh overwhelming spiritual beautiful moment of my surfing career is that the one that got you to shut the shop down yes I have why we won the event the year before but that was solidified it yes that really um put the feather in my cap that i was somebody in the surfing world brother doing the show a long time that's that's one of my favorite moments ever right there it's interesting in a very different way as i was hearing you describe that i was to be honest with you i was thinking about like being an entrepreneur and starting my business and points in time where i had to tell myself i'm gonna make it i'm gonna make it i'm gonna make it in other points in times where i'm like thank you god you carried me through this part of it and i landed on my feet i'm not exactly sure how that all happened but it sure is beautiful it's interesting um you want to ask you another question about that i used to spot i used to be a part of a group that sponsored carl edwards he was a nascar driver many years ago very successful one i don't know if you remember didn't i meet him yeah successful dude and i had asked him one time like what's the part of racing that most people would know about and the first thing he says well one, don't look at the wall.

21:08And he said, I mean it because if you actually look at the wall, you gravitate towards it to Nicole's point earlier about thoughts, right? The other thing he said was, and I never thought about it before, but I wanted to ask you, he said, probably the scariest moment is there's a crash in front of you and all there is a smoke. And you know, on the other end of that crash, there's, there could be five, 10, 20 cars, and you're doing one 50 right through the smoke and you don't know what's on the other side of it. and you could be killed on the other side of that smoke and when I was what I watched a video of you last night it's and I know even the video doesn't do it justice you guys he looks like a speck like he looks he looks like a mouse on Mount Everest at the size of this wave I mean the grandeur of it is there an element of that for you Garrett where you're just like I have to embrace the unknown and I'm just going to sort of figure it out as I go.

22:02I don't, I can't know everything on what's on the other side of that smoke or on the other side of that break. Is there a part of you that's built this muscle of like, you know what? I don't know. And I'm going anyway. Yeah. That's when preparation comes in and your team and anything that I've accomplished was always, I give a lot, half of the credit to my team and going, coming down a wave and And not seeing it perfect and not knowing if you're actually going to be able to make it. It's kind of, for me, more exhilarating and a little more fun because it's more challenging and you don't really know what you're going to get.

22:41You're getting it. You're going to expect on the other side. And I always did love the underwater rides. I always loved getting pounded. So I would do my best to put myself in the right spot, do my best to make my waves. but if I wasn't going to make it, I always really enjoyed it as well. Gosh, I guess I just, I'm blown away by you. I just, I'm blown away by you. Nicole, what's been the scariest moment?

23:07In our surfing career? In anything. No, it could be whatever just came to your mind.

23:15No, I mean, definitely from season two, we lost my brother for several minutes, which felt like a very long time. And it was the first time we ever lost somebody. I mean, he was found, thank God. But there was that moment where he was lost. And it's like, you can't call the Coast Guard. It's not like, hey, can you find my brother? He's under a wave. Just this moment. And then Garrett's like, where is he? I'm like, he's nowhere, you know, like what, what do you do in that instance except surrender? And, you know, it's funny because the other scariest moment was, uh, the last birth of, uh, our child say, um, you know, we, we were, we got really sick.

24:10I got COVID and nine months pregnant and my liver shut down and they were saying she could be stillborn. And I mean, that's obviously super scary, but in both those situations with my brother lost at sea and, uh, you know, Faye not knowing what would happen when she was born, uh, you know, it's that surrender. It's kind of what you guys were just talking about, the surrender to the unknown. You know, if we would have panicked with CJ or panicked with the birth of the baby, would that have changed the outcome would that have helped the outcome no so it's like surrendering to the unknown knowing that you've done everything you could possibly do and have to sit in that moment and be at be okay with how it's going to play out you know because panic and stress it's just adding to to the situation it's not helpful so what do you do in those moments of complete, you know, loss of control, because that's what it is.

25:18You're at an absolute loss of control. I'm out the back and I'm just visualizing, okay, he's got his flotation on. Okay. He's going to pop up sooner or later. We're going to find him. If he's passed out, we're going to bring him back. And then I process a negative thought, which I usually don't. And I thought, okay, I've always shared with people that these waves are so powerful that they can strip you naked with one lip on the head could rip your wetsuit off and all your flotation. And I kind of visualized that for a second like oh my god did that happen and that was yeah that was probably one of the scariest moments of my career not knowing where he was and no eyes on him

25:58what does it feel like Garrett when you crash in a big wave like that what happens to you and what are you doing are you are you trying to say I'll let you tell me I was gonna say stay calm but what do i know well every wipeout is so different but usually they're super powerful and it's like mike tyson just punching you underwater and then it's like a washing machine on spin cycle with king kong shaking up and down and then you you come up when you when so you're getting pounded you pull your inflation you're coming up and you're hoping there's not another way you're hoping you get your lips out before the next wave comes you just get your lips up and all this foam is coming in and you're barely getting a breath and wow another one rolls over you and yeah and that can happen over and over and over repeatedly uh usually you get like two or three maybe four and then your partners come and get you in the jet ski but sometimes you pop up and they're right there but usually it takes at least a second one because they get eyes on you when you pop up and And then they're like, OK, you got to calculate where to be, where he's going to pop up next and be right on the side of him when he pops up.

27:10There's no time to spare in between waves. How dangerous are those guys? I always wanted to ask you this, Nicole, you're doing all those safety stuff. How dangerous? Because the video is always like you surfing the wave. But then once in a while, they'll show the guy on the Sea-Doo pulling you out there. And I'm like, even though he's on a Sea-Doo, that looks pretty frigging gnarly to me, too. Like, is that is that a dangerous? This sounds naive, but they're also in peril as well, aren't they? Those guys. I don't know who you've been toe surfing with, but we use Yamahas. Okay. There we go. Let's slide that in there.

27:43Sorry. Yamahas. No, I'm joking. Very good, brother. But are they in danger too, Nicole? Those guys? Or because they're on machines? Oh, yeah. They are, right? Actually, some of the craziest situations I've seen involves the jet skis. What do you think your kids are learning from you two? Are you consciously doing something different with your children and the way you raise them or teach them? I mean, it's not a normal upbringing. I mean, you travel a lot. What are you trying to instill in them for their lives? We feel like we're giving them freedom to be who they are. And at times it's we, you know, second guess ourself.

28:30Are we doing the right things? And we were at this hotel the other night by chance because I got our car, a flat tire on a car. That's a whole nother story. And the lady who was working at the hotel, very nice lady, she said, I've been here for over 10 years. I've never seen children play together like your kids do. And I've never seen such loving, caring children towards each other. And that really made me go, okay, we are doing the right things. I mean, we're definitely living outside of the norm when it comes to how we're raising our children, for sure. but one of the things that is really important to me is emotional intelligence and being able for them to be able to feel and not stopped from feeling and then learning how to identify those feelings and then how to move through those feelings you know there's a lot of times, um, our middle child, she's fire.

29:36She has a lot of feelings. She's very loving, but at the same time, she can be extremely fierce and she gets big, big feelings. And you know, the, the newest thing I've been trying is like, Hey, feelings are like clouds. They pass by. So you're feeling it right now, but in a little bit, that cloud's going to move and there's going to be a new cloud. So don't get stuck on that one cloud because so many more are going to come. So you just enjoy the feeling and it's going to pass. Even if it's not a good feeling, it's going to pass. Like just getting them, you know, just conscious of their feelings.

30:16But the other thing is, is, you know, there's all this, uh, for barrel, especially the oldest with the surfing, you know, always it's all day long. We're going surfing. We're going surfing. oh barrel working on his surfing this and that we gotta go train get it at it they come home oh barrel did this barrel did this i just look at him like i don't really care i'm like did you do something kind today did you give somebody a compliment did you help somebody did you help someone you know it's it's for me it's for them how are they going to show up in the world and how are they going to share their gifts with the world for me it was really chat it was really challenging because it's the use your words and not much, not much, um,

31:07Control. We're not controlling our kids. No, not much consequence. And, uh, and the consequence that there are there. I mean, if we were more, if we, we're not real consistent always with the con with the type of consequence, if we were more consistent with the consequence of the way that we give them consequence it worked really well but we're soft and and a fold when they come on we're not perfect yeah but for me with the usual words were super challenging now i'm 100 behind it and when he's crying for no reason let him cry let him have his feeling and before it's like come on that's not i'll give you a reason to cry you know old school and then um just really the consequences i mean if it's really soft and loving and kind and okay, go, go sit and sit over there.

32:01That's your spot for the next five minutes. You can't move. Okay. But being mean and, and using, I don't know, how do I explain it? Like with your dad, the other, I finally shifted. I took me a long time and I finally shifted to where I just want to love them. When they're getting mad, I just want to give them love. When they're upset, I just want to give them love. When they're doing something wrong, I just want to give them love. And it took me a long time to shift to that. But I know 100 percent without a doubt, with all of my heart and all of my being, that that's what we need to be doing for our children.

32:33And that's how we need to show up as parents. Just love them always. And that's, you know, that's us. It's instead of reacting to our children, we need to respond to our children. Yeah, that's a that's damn life lesson. When you're just saying that about the meanness, my kids are, my son turned professional golfer yesterday. I got to caddy for him in his first tournament. Yeah, congratulations. Yeah, it was cool. It was cool to compete with him. My back's killing me from carrying a tag, but that's another story. But I have to tell you, they're both in their 20s now. And if you go to the moments I regret as a dad, it was the moments that Garrett described that he knows is wrong.