693: How A Simple Journaling Practice Can Have a HUGE Impact

0:01Okay, I have been on this ruthless pursuit to purge any clothes that I'm not actually wearing. Like if I haven't reached for it in months, it's got to go. I am trying to be really intentional about what I bring into my closet right now, which means I am only buying pieces that I know I will actually wear and use. Revolve just gets it though. I'm literally wearing my brown Autry sneakers from there right now and my new suede purse. It fits my laptop in it. So it's basically a fancy shoulder bag that works for everything. I love finding pieces like that. Things that look good, but also work hard for my actual life.

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1:15So happy shopping. We think we are just different and we're not allowed to ask for any help. And I just encourage people to not just journal, but also go out and find your support squad because other founders and entrepreneurs are going to understand what you're going through more than anybody else. Hey, my name is Jenna Kutcher and I am obsessed with all things business, marketing numbers, and helping you to navigate both the messy and the magical seasons of this thing called life. I'm a small town mama who took a$300 camera, grew a successful photo biz, and now I work from home and run a seven figure online business.

1:52I teach you the tried and true secrets to building a career you adore. Shy away from the real talk? No way. Money, hardship, growth, loss, and marketing are all topics we discuss here. Think of this as your one-stop shop for happy hour with a gal pal mixed with business school. Pull up a seat, make sure you're cozy and get ready to be challenged and encouraged while you learn. This is the Gold Digger Podcast. Are you living life with intention? As business owners, it can be so hard to make time for ourselves amongst all of our other responsibilities, like taking care of ourselves and our families, working out, eating three meals a day and digging our biggest goals.

2:28But what if I told you that a CEO's mind needs a daily workout and a mental gym just as much as your body does. Staying motivated to chase your dreams can sometimes be difficult, but the solution to stay on track may be simpler than you think. In fact, it may only require a pen and paper and just five minutes a day. My guest today is the founder and CEO of Silk & Sonder, a San Francisco-based VC-backed self-care and self-improvement brand delivering thoughtfully designed and science-backed journals to help women reduce anxiety and stress, boost productivity, and achieve their goals. With customers in all 50 states, thousands of five-star reviews, and millions in revenue, Silk & Sonder is leading the charge in community-based self-care at a macro level, and they're solving our loneliness epidemic by offering easy-to-use, fun, and effective tools for connection, belonging, and self-fulfillment.

3:20Maya Agrawal's motto is, life's too short to not be in the driver's seat of her own life, And I think that is a perfect place for us to start today with this conversation about living life with intention. Let's dive on in. Recently, my team went down to a four-day work week so we can spend more time in the sun and less time in front of screens. In order for us to be able to do that, we have to work smarter and not harder. That's why we're so excited about HubSpot's integrated AI tech. It's helping teams like ours automate the more tedious parts of running a business like doing research, summarizing information, writing copy, and more.

3:56Recent research shows that marketers are already slicing time spent on admin tasks in a half thanks to AI from five hours to two and a half hours per day. Just imagine with all that extra time, you could be joining us with a four-day work week too. Start saving time in your business with the help of the AI power tools built right into HubSpot CRM. Learn more and get started today at HubSpot.com. So I recently got this beautiful box in the mail. One thing to note, my husband always is like, what did you order every time a box shows up on my doorstep? And I was like, babe, I didn't order anything.

4:33And I opened it up and it was a beautiful journal and it was this beautiful key chain. Now, the following day, my husband gifts our four-year-old this really cute jewelry box. This girl loves jewelry and it has a key. And I'm like, dear Lord, we are going to lock it and lose this key. And so your key chain arrived at the perfect moment in time, because now my daughter carries around this little key chain with your company's name on it with her little jewelry box keys. So first, welcome to the show, Maya. Thank you for having me. I'm so excited. And how freaking adorable. That's so cute. I have this little image.

5:12It's awesome. It was the perfect timing. and I was like, oh, I have just the thing. And so your package arrived just in time. So for those of you who are like, wait, a key chain, a package, a journal, talk to me about what I'm talking about. How did you get to where you are today? And what inspired the starting of your company, which is called Silk & Sonder? Yes. Awesome. Well, first of all, the key chain is a metaphor to reclaim the driver's seat of your life. And so the fact that your daughter is already carrying around this key chain is a great sign because she's telling the world, look, I own my journey and here I am.

5:47So, you know, I started Silk & Sonder, which is a self-care and self-improvement company based in San Francisco that helps women across every generation from Gen Z all the way to boomers reclaim the driver's seat of their life. So our products, our journals and our companion mobile app essentially help women discover their dreams, achieve their goals, reduce anxiety and stress and boost their productivity. But rewinding all the way back to how I got started, I grew up in a small town called Santa Barbara, California. My dad's a professor. Both my parents immigrated from India in the late 80s. And so being the first child of immigrant parents, you know how that tends to go down.

6:29We are taught at a very early age that the only thing that matters in life is education and achievement. And so growing up, I was conditioned to believe that there were four paths to success, being a doctor, a lawyer, an academic, or an engineer. And so being the good Indian daughter that I am, I wound up studying computer science and business in college. And then I ended up in New York working for Goldman Sachs. And that really began this hamster wheel journey of fulfilling other people's expectations of myself, chasing society's definition of success. And so, you know, one job after another, I was a software engineer and product manager.

7:06and ultimately that chase of gold stars and building those safety nets, at a certain point, they catch up with you, right? So like every classic millennial woke up with a quarter-life crisis. And by that point, I had hit my fair share of ruts. And so in my mid-20s, I had built this facade that life was amazing. And I was dating my then boyfriend, now husband. I was living in San Francisco and I was working at Stitch Fix, which at the time was on the verge of going public. but I woke up just ungrateful, under fulfilled, unhappy. And I had no one to go to because this was on paper, the life that I thought I wanted.

7:42And so, you know, that's what led me to start Silk and Sondra because this personal journey of mine led me down this path of self-discovery, self-reflection, but I needed that inspired action and therapy felt intimidating to navigate. Coaching at the time wasn't as popular, it was expensive. And I didn't know what the results would be. And then self-help books lack the accountability and meditation apps, quite frankly, just didn't work for my brain. And so even though I was a skeptic of journaling, I managed to put together a guide for myself and it ended up doing wonders for my emotional health, organization, focus, productivity.

8:17And then I would talk about it with my girlfriends. And so that's when I knew that a community-based approach to daily personal wellbeing and personal growth was necessary. And so here I am, you know, a few years later, and now we have millions in revenue and tens of thousands of customers in every state of the country. And I'm so glad I, you know, quit my day job to do this because it's so rewarding. One thing that I love on your website is it says emotional health doesn't need to be so serious or stigmatized. It just needs to be prioritized. and you go on to say, as a culture, we're more stressed, anxious, and burned out than ever.

8:57Without proactive practices in place to combat the stress of modern life, we're falling short of achieving the deeper fulfillment that we crave as we carry out our daily lives. So talk to me a little bit about how the mission, which started as something for you personally, kind of transformed into something that transcends so far beyond just you. Yeah, it's a great question. And I love sharing this anecdote, which I think you'll appreciate too. But when Silk and Sonder was a nights and weekends project and I had built kind of the initial minimum lovable product version of it, I received an email.

9:29And this was a woman in maybe her late 30s who had adult ADHD and she had two daughters. And she came to me and she said, your product has changed my life. The fact that I get a new journal in the mail with all these exercises, it helps me stay focused and organized and inspired. And that's when I knew that I was onto something much bigger than myself, because this woman was a different age. She came from a different background. She was battling different issues. And for me, that was my signal because it also made me realize that we live in this world where mental health is its own box. When in reality, mental health is the note.

10:03It's how we're doing in all areas of our life. And regardless of whether you have a clinical diagnosis or not, it's just a part of your identity. It's not your soul identity. And so, you know, I started to notice and talk to customers about their journeys. And I realized two things. One is as a society, we are so reactive. Only when the bad things happen, are we suddenly like, oh, I should work on my emotional well-being or I should have a good self-care routine. But when it comes to working out, it's always proactive. You don't go to the gym and question, oh, when I lift a weight, this is how the muscle is going to expand.

10:40you just do it. And so why don't we have a system in place, no matter who you are or what you're dealing with. Silk and Sonder is tailored to your lifestyle and your routine. And you just do the reps. You show up for yourself for five minutes and you show up for everybody else. And now we have thousands of stories beyond just ADHD, right? People dealing with chronic illness or being a busy mom or struggling with her new identity. We're always changing and evolving as humans and life hits us in the face. And so Silk and Sonder is providing somewhat of that stability when life gets tough. And then you've got this community of women who've experienced similar things as you and can be your shoulder to lean on when times get tough.

11:20And also the cheerleader when things are going great. You know, it's so interesting. The person that you brought up, like I have ADHD and I have been someone who has like a journaling graveyard. and last year was a huge shift for me because I was someone that would always like go out, buy a new journal. I'd be like, this is it. And then like three days in my journal would think I died, right? Like they're like, where did you go? And I had to start incorporating a five minute daily practice. And it was something that I had heard about on a podcast and it was just this very simple practice. And I was like, if I can just do this for like 30 days, I just want to see what would happen.

11:57And it was so transformative for me to just do a daily check-in, but also to have like a log to look back on and be like, are there themes here? Are there things that I'm noticing? Does my menstrual cycle change or experience of life? And it was so fascinating because I feel like we're somewhat documenting our lives, whether it's online, but we're not actually like going to the core of it. And one thing that I love is that you talk about how your silk and sonder journals are backed by positive psychology. Can you talk about any like scientific evidence that supports the act of journaling in general?

12:30Because I think there's something to be said there. And for people who are doubting or they're like, I don't know if I can actually get this into practice. Talk to me about that. Yeah, absolutely. So there's plenty of research and clinical psychologists that have confirmed that the act of journaling helps your brain fire those happy feelings and also process those emotions. And so especially when you bring pen to paper, there's scientific evidence on how that improves immunity, how that helps heal trauma, how that helps improve cognitive function, and then of course, reduce anxiety and stress.

13:04And so there's plenty of physical and mental health benefits. You are being forced to reflect, process emotions, and then start to think about a path of, you know, how can I get past this difficult time and, you know, organizing your thoughts around it. But I think there's also additional science and research behind how Silk and Sonder approaches it, right? It's not a free form journal where people have to be self-disciplined about it. We're giving you these themed prompts every month. We're using this concept of novelty, which helps, you know, keep things fresh and exciting. And we all know what that does to our dopamine levels.

13:38And so there's a lot of cognitive behavioral therapy and narrative therapy and art therapy baked into not just the journal, but also our extended library of wellness content in our app. And then the last piece is, and it's something we often forget, but generosity and accountability. So sharing your experience with others not only helps you achieve your goals, you're 65 % more likely to achieve your goals if you share it with someone else. But if you consistently meet with those people again and again, that number shoots up to 95%. And at Gold Digger, we know how important those goals are. And so when it comes to accountability, Silk and Sonder is also solving that through these community events and this consistent Silk and Sonder experience.

14:16So it's this marriage of both journaling, but also the accountability component to it as well. So I'm super curious. I love that you have both a physical and a digital aspect of it. And I think that's really, really interesting. I also think that has to be really challenging, right? Like as a CEO, I'm like, hey girl, like this is amazing. Walk me through kind of why you have both the benefits of both, maybe the challenges of having both because it's a beautiful marriage, but it's also two different business models and two different teams and things like that. So talk to me about that. Yeah. And you know, like, I think for me, because I was exposed to the world of technology and data science, you know, my previous jobs, and I saw how Stitch Fix used technology as a vehicle to create these magical moments for consumers, not just online, but also offline.

15:10I had a hypothesis that we would do the same because when it comes to your emotional wellbeing and dealing with feelings of loneliness or social comparison or all these things, I knew that we needed a guided structure that was offline because that's what science tells us works. And as human beings, we crave connection and belonging. And so first the journal, you know, when I started it, it was very much the space to disconnect in order to reconnect with yourself because we're living in this digitally bombarded world. However, in order to share your experiences and connect with others, you've got to have that powered by an app or something that's digital because then you can take your pictures and you can share virtually.

15:52And then more importantly, the app really provides the opportunity to add personalization and allow, you know, what is Jenna's life today? And what is it going to be like three months from now or a year from now? And how can Silk and Sonder be that accountability buddy for you. And so together, you know, we know that we can't just stop at an analog solution, nor can we start with just a digital solution. We have to marry the best of that guided journaling experience from both. And it's very hard to do, but I always say, you know, that's what makes entrepreneurs special. We do the hard stuff because nobody else wants to.

16:25And if you want to actually solve a problem, you have to kind of do it holistically and not just in these baby pieces. What has it looked like in terms of your own journaling practice and how it's evolved from before you started to like where you're at today? That's a great question. So when I started, I was a total skeptic. You know, my girlfriends were like, you're always complaining. You're so negative. Just go watch the secret and journal. And I was like, I don't have time for dear diary. I have so many blank, beautiful notebooks that I haven't touched. I don't want to do this. But then when you're at rock bottom and you have no choices, you try, right?

17:02And I started with a very simple five-minute practice, like you mentioned, three things that I'm grateful for, three things that I am seeking to accomplish. And because I would wake up anxious, I would write down three things that are making me anxious. And just by writing it, I started to notice that I would problem solve around it, or I'd realize, oh, this might not even happen. Why am I stressing out about that. So that five minute ritual has now evolved into anywhere from a 15 to 30 minute ritual in the morning. Even before I brush my teeth, I open up, I actually have a blank journal first where I start with just free writing.

17:36And I typically, depending on what I'm in the mood for, sometimes I need a brain dump. Sometimes I need to write a million things that I'm grateful for. Sometimes I am talking about challenges and converting them to gifts. So I do my free right thing. And then I immediately use Silicon Sonder to help, you know, do the fun, lighter journaling prompts. And then the planning, what am I going to do today? Because I think one thing people get wrong about journaling is it's not just reflection, right? It's the act of writing things down. And so if you're action oriented, journaling is still for you, you can write the things that you want to accomplish today, right?

18:11And then break it into baby habits. So now, you know, journaling and reflecting and taking inspired action is 100 % of my day. I mean, I even, you know, from work, I'm writing things down, even, you know, the preparation that I have to do for quarterly planning, I start with pen to paper because of what that does to my cognitive function. So yeah, now it's my crux. And there are times when I'm extremely overwhelmed. And I literally book five minutes or 10 minutes, you know, with a meeting with myself, and I write things down because that helps, you know, download whatever's in my head. So much more time.

18:47It's so interesting because for a long time too, I feel like I had a limiting belief of like, I wake up when my kids wake up, which could be five in the morning, like today, or it could be 7am and I'm still sleeping because every minute of sleep is perfect. And so I started journaling at night. And one thing that I noticed for me, that was really helpful as somebody with ADHD is that a lot of times I have trouble having my mind slow down, right? Like I'm like in bed and I'm like, I didn't send that email or I need to check my Google calendar. And so what has been so helpful for me too, is like trusting that my thoughts live in a place where I can revisit them and then I can release them in a totally different way.

19:27And so it's interesting because I think a lot of people have this like very specific visual that journaling needs to happen, you know, on a cozy couch with a beautiful blanket and a hot cup of coffee and music playing. And it's like for many of us modern day women, it is going to look absolutely different. Whether you're sitting in your car at the pickup line or it's before bed and you're tired, but you want to like jot things down. And so I love kind of shifting that narrative because I'm like, it looks different for each of us on a daily basis. But the biggest thing that I found, and I'm curious if you found this as well is if I have it out invisible, I do it.

20:03If it is in a drawer, I mean, same thing with like vitamins or like, you know, it's just like the same type of thing. My skincare is out on my shelf. So I see it. Have you found anything for people who have failed to follow through on journaling in the past that has been helpful to help them become consistent with it? Yes. Well, first of all, I totally agree with you. And I think over time it changes, right? when you have kids and all this stuff. And so it's so impressive to me how people make Silicon Sonder and journaling in general adapt to their constantly evolving routines. However, I do think habit stacking is super duper important.

20:39And so if you're new to journaling or if you've lost the habit for a bit, I always recommend when do you feel anxious or not like yourself? So if you wake up anxious like me, I recommend that you spend your five minutes in the morning. If you have trouble sleeping, do it in the evening. If you are scattered throughout the day, figure out a time right before lunch and just take those five minutes and do it. And I think that consistency of me time and making it less of a chore and more something that you're excited about, you know, you get to write these things down in this pretty journal. That is what is going to lead to change because the consistency of that habit, while the routine may change over time, that craving of, oh, I didn't do this and I feel a little off, like that is going to help over time.

21:21And, you know, 95 % of our customers say that Silk and Sondra has improved their mental health. And that's because of the consistency, right? And the ease of how it integrates. But you've got to make that time commitment to yourself and choose when it works for you. Yeah. Could you share with us a few different journaling prompts that anyone could do if they just whipped out a notebook and a piece of paper and were feeling inspired from this conversation? Share a few things that could get people thinking. That's a great question. I think to start, I would definitely recommend starting with five things I'm grateful for, because there's so much science around physiologically, you cannot feel stressed and anxious if you feel grateful at the same time.

22:02So start with the silly things, right? If you're lucky enough to have shelter, if you have running water, it sounds cliche, but if you truly are in a hard place to feel grateful, start with the basics. Thankful for my body, my brain, whatever it might be. And then you'll start to notice the small glimmers day to day. And then, you know, that's, that's like one exercise. I think for people who are a little bit more action oriented, I recommend starting with gratitude. And then, you know, what are the three things that bring me joy? And then maybe another one that I like to ask is what is working well in my life right now?

22:37And what is not working well in my life? And for the things that are not working well in my life, Like what is one action that I can take to help turn this around? And I think of that framework of just reflection, getting clear on what we're looking for next and why, and then actually coming up with a habit comes full circle. And then you start to see the magic transform. Yeah. You can't dig your biggest goals without a little hard work, which is why I bet you'll love listening to the Hustle Daily Show brought to you by the HubSpot Podcast Network, hosted by Zachary Crockett, Jacob Cohen, Rob Litterst, and Juliet Bennett, The Hustle Daily Show brings you a healthy dose of irreverent, offbeat, and informative takes on business and tech news.

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