746: 5 Surprising Ways I’ve Changed in the Last 5 Years

27:47And I also think too, there was such a learning curve going from all the beautiful things that you had done into this brand new digital space. And it's so wild because our communication has gotten so dang good to the point where like, we can wake up the next day and be like, I'm so sorry I said that to you yesterday. And that way you're like, I was rethinking the way I phrased that. And like, I actually didn't mean it that way. And we recover so quickly. And we also know each other's intentions and heart. And like, we also know like the chaos that is likely happening behind the scenes, like when we're quick shooting out text messages or slacks.

28:23And so it's so interesting because I think that when you are bringing up a team, most entrepreneurs, especially if you're a solopreneur or you're a side hustler, you never really imagine yourself managing a team of people, right? That really isn't the vision of entrepreneurship that most of us hold. And yet as a business grows, as the plans change or the goals grow, your team grows. And so all of a sudden, now your day to day is managing humans and not necessarily creating. And I think for a lot of people, that can be really hard. And for me, I, I was not a great communicator. And I was in a phase of life where like everything just felt frantic, right?

29:03Like it I was like, the baby's sleeping and I'm done feeding. I have 20 minutes. Like, let me shoot all this out and like, hope everyone can catch this like spaghetti at the wall. And I feel like you've taught me so much about communication. And it's an area that like we consistently keep working on. But like that has been so much growth. And I would have said I was a good communicator then. And I feel like, no, no, I was not. That's such a huge compliment. So thank you. I want to honor that. I also want to honor that. Yes, we have both grown in this area. And let's reiterate what Jenna said. We did not start here.

29:44We have grown here. So I remember when I accepted the integrator role and listening to Amy Porterfield's podcast with her integrator, Chloe, at the time. And I remember them talking about how they were just BFFs and they were like totally each other's brains and so forth. And I just remember thinking like, that's exactly how I want to be. Like, I'm just going to come in and we're going to love each other 100%. We're just going to get each other and we're going to do the dang thing and it's going to be great. And I just set these high expectations about like, I'm going to come in and lead and develop this team and did not take into consideration myself that from your seat and the entrepreneurial founder seat, that that's going to take time.

30:28That's going to take trust. That's going to take me showing up consistently and showing you that I can do that. And so that is something I look back on of like, you can expect to like vibe off the first beat, but recognize that it takes time and energy and investment to build this relationship. And then from a communication perspective, to learn from each other and to learn about each other. One of the most powerful tools for me has been human design. And Jenna, you just did an incredible episode with Jenna Zoe on this topic, where for me, diving into my own self-discovery of how I communicate and interact with the world around me has allowed me to then understand more about how you interact and navigate with the world around you.

31:18and has made me more open to, okay, this is how I receive her when she does this or this. And so now I can communicate, this is how I receive when you do this or this. And I think being able to, again, know myself has allowed me to know you better too. And then to shape how I communicate or how I receive or how I then speak to you and the team too. so it's so cool too because like with human design like you and I kind of keep nerding out on it but I also feel like it gives us opportunities to both acknowledge like how we're built and like just certain aspects of ourselves but also like how we can grow and one thing I think we do so well for each other is to notice like I noticed you did it this way like that is amazing like even yesterday you did that like hey I noticed that you paused a beat to check in with me on this.

32:11Like, and it's just like so cool too. And I think it's such a reminder that like everyone has different communication styles and learning about like how people receive. It's kind of like the love languages, right? Like how do you love? How do you give love? Like it's very similar to that. And everyone on the team has very different styles. Like there's certain people on the team that like, they just don't, they don't want a small talk. They want to get right to work. And then there's certain people on the team where they want the hi, hello, how was your weekend? How's your aunt doing? What did you eat for lunch?

32:40And like learning that about people just brings more humanness into the business and the work. And so I think communication has been a huge shift and really to just being super intentional and thoughtful, but also like open and honest with each other. One of the funniest stories they have of us is I always like, well, just check on Marissa. Like, and I just would say like, Hey, just checking in. And I literally just meant like, how's it going? How are you doing? And finally, one day she's like, I got to tell you, I hate when you say that. I feel like you're like just making sure that I'm like doing my job.

33:14And I was like, oh my gosh, no, I like totally just meant like, how's it going over there? And like, just like those types of things. It's so great. Like it's so life-giving. It makes me laugh because it's like, oh, my intention was fully different than the way it was being received. But being able to also express that is so powerful because then it just like elevates again, you did this different level of like camaraderie and understanding and empathy and love. And I think that's really powerful. We also have more channels of communication now too, than once we did in the beginning. So I, in the beginning, when I came into the brand, we primarily communicate through Slack and through audios.

33:54Yep. And now we communicate through calls. I remember when getting a call on your calendar was like, can I please get on your calendar? But now it's totally different. I just picked up, I feel like in November I was having a day and I just called you. I was like, Hey, I just need to talk to you like about this right now. This was on my mind and my heart. And like, I would have never done that in the beginning at all. Not that you were not approachable. Let me preface that. No, no, no, no. I, I had, it was, it was so weird when I think back. Okay. Five years ago. So I'll paint a tiny bit of context, but also when I look back at this, I'm like, wait, what?

34:35So obviously a lot of people know with our fertility journey, it took us three years to have Coco. And when she came, my pregnancy was really rough. I was really depressed. I was so just like anxious the whole time. And so I blacked out the entire first year of her life of my calendar. Like I was so fortunate that I was in a position to say like, I am saying no to everything. And there's something interesting. And I don't know if it's the ADHD, the human designs, probably all of those things. But like, I actually hate having things on my calendar. Like my favorite days of my life are days where there's nothing on it.

35:11And like, I can do anything. Because there's something weird. I'd love to know if other listeners relate to this or not. I think it's just I don't know something. My sister's like this. So I know I'm not the only one. But if I have something on my calendar, and then like the day comes, and I don't want to do it. And I like dread it. I'm like, who put this on my calendar? I'm like, I did. Why did I do that? And then most of the time I do it. And I'm like, so thankful I did it, whether it's like a girl's night or meeting someone for lunch or whatever. Anyways, when you joined the team, I was in this like black and white stage of life of like, I just need to black out my calendar.

35:43I need to focus on being a mom. You know, if the baby's fussy, like I don't want to be like struggling to get on a phone call. Like I didn't want any commitments to anyone. And there's probably a lot of therapy necessary there to like fully unpack what that maybe was, but it was so black and white. And I remember you being like, so what do you do for team calls? I was like, we don't do them. Like I, I didn't want anything on my calendar. Like it was just so absolute. And so it's hilarious because today I literally have six meetings on my calendar. So things have absolutely changed. And I think though, what's beautiful is you brought in this level of like community and collaboration that didn't exist.

36:28And when I think of like what an integrator is, an integrator is, has never been the right word for you, but like, that's the only word that I can think of to even encompass it. But when I think about that, it's so beautiful how it brought everyone in. And it's so funny because our team loves each other. When I tell people like we have an all female team, people are always like picturing like the bad girls club TV show or something like, I don't know. And I'm like, no, like we really respect each other. We enjoy each other. Like there's something really, really special in it. And so you brought in that collaboration, but like not without resistance from me.

37:08Talk a little bit about that. I mean, that is actually really funny. Oh, buddy. There is a lot of resistance. I remember handling partnerships and then wanting to map a campaign maybe two months out. And you're like, I don't know where I'm going to be in two months. Like, I don't know what I'm going to feel. And I was like, how am I supposed to book this campaign? It was very hard. It was very challenging to navigate working ahead because we do batch work in this brand. We do get ahead, but it was hard to plan out even further based on that. And it was hard to collaborate sometimes in that way.

37:47And if there was like something I didn't understand, I need more context on, it can get cumbersome going back and forth in Slack. So now being able to like, oh, right. So it's like incredible to now have our team calls. We also have our team retreats, Yes. Which you started when I came to the brand as well, which has been incredible experiences together. And oh, my gosh, the best of times. And so it's very challenging onboarding and first few years with that mentality. And I'm very thankful that we have evolved past it and that I can pick up the phone randomly if I need to. But also to like you are so willing and flexible now as well.

38:31If we need to like bump something up or communicate through anything, you're always available. Yeah. So I mean, man, I'll look back at that girl. I'm like, whoa, I think there's something. I mean, I really do think I need therapy around this now that we're talking about it. Like, I think there was something in me five years ago that like, I think one becoming a mom, obviously huge shift. but I also just think too, it was like, I was so afraid to like be boxed into anything. And like, when I think about that, it's like, I had so much resistance to like being locked in and committed to anything because I just felt so, I felt like when I imagined it, I felt like a leave, like blowing around, like, where's the wind going to take me today?

39:17And that is not a great way to run a business. Let me tell you somehow we made it work, but it is so interesting. And, And it's funny too, because, you know, today I have a bunch of calls and I've kind of been working through this year, figuring out what is my rhythm and like what, what feels good and really creating boundaries around that as well. Like for me, I am now creating and I've, you know, it's such a privilege to be able to do this, but to say like no calls on Monday, we're taking Fridays off. So Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, going to be a little bit of a grind. If you need to talk to me, it's going to happen on these three days, but it's been a really cool thing to be able to look at my calendar, look at my rhythm, think about like the energy that I have in different times of the month as a woman and just different things like that.

40:02And really honoring that and setting boundaries around that, but being available. And I think that's really cool. But man, have we gone a long way. Calendar blocking, like, who are you? Oh my gosh. I don't even know. Another thing that has shifted so much. And I will say, and I will go on the record saying this, I think we have one of the best team cultures that exists in this space. And I think that there was a lot more urgency and maybe scarcity. And I feel like we have really worked hard and intentionally to hit a place of more peace and ease and fun in the business. And when I think back to five years ago, I think that there was this, and it's not desperation, but it was almost like consistently just like trying to figure out like, is this going to keep working?

40:56Is this going to keep working? There was like that uncertainty of like, how does this business work? How does it scale? Do I want it to scale? What is that going to look like? Who do we need to do this? And I feel like we have landed in this beautiful place where like, we feel like we have the team built out. We have the right people in the right positions. We're constantly working on refining things. And we're also much more relaxed. Like if something goes wrong or something doesn't have the result that we want, there is this beautiful release in it where there's no, like we are really good at letting go.

41:29And I think that that's something newer. And I think that's something that we're consistently working on. But I think a lot of that comes from this ability to like experiment and have fun and test. And I feel like there was a lot more rigidity in the past. It's time for Cyber Monday, Dell technology's biggest sale of the year. You'll find the lowest prices of the year on select Dell PCs like the Dell 16 Plus with Intel Core Ultra processors. And with built-in advanced AI features, it's the PC that helps you do more faster. From smarter multitasking to extended battery life, these PCs handle the busy work so you can focus on what actually matters to you.

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42:48Can you believe that we're already wrapping up 2025? This year was packed with travel and so many new memories. One of my favorite moments was our team retreat in Arizona with the incredible women who helped me keep this business running. I also recently took the kids to Nashville during fall break and somewhere in between I squeezed in a trip to Puerto Rico with friends. We booked some of our most memorable stays this year on Airbnb. There's something special about finding a place that doesn't just look great in the photos but actually feels welcoming the moment you walk in. That this feels right kind of feeling.

43:21If you've got trips coming up, whether it's a family vacation, a retreat or a work trip, your house will probably be sitting empty while you're gone. Have you considered hosting your home on Airbnb and letting it work for you? It's a simple way to earn some extra income that can be put towards a future trip or home improvement projects. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.com forward slash host. I think that you've changed that in me. Ooh. I think that has actually been one of the biggest needle movers, not only in the brand, But for me as an individual working in the brand, because I came in with more of that rigid structure.

44:05Yeah. And that we need to do things a certain way. And it would be very hard for me to let go of something that did not go well. Or it would be very hard for me to stretch goal it. Yeah. And think, can we really reach this or experiment? Yeah. That is not natural for me. And so I think it's been beautiful to see not only how you have interrobed that into the brand as a whole, but also how you, you know, sprinkled that into myself and likely others on the team, too. And having that mentality of like, we got this, we can do anything. Let's just test it. Let's try. It's OK. We're not saving lives here.

44:50Yes. Do you know what I mean? Like it's such, it's such a different mentality. And it's, I really feel like it's been a big gift too. I think that a lot of times, and I've shared this story before on the podcast, but it's been a while. But when I first learned launching, this is kind of a funny story. I should have written about it in my book. When I first learned launching. So I reached out to Amy Porterfield, who said, no, she's not gonna teach me how to launch, which she's now my best friend. She sent me to this guy named Rick, Rick sent me to this other person who shall be unnamed of, Oh, this person can teach you how to launch.

45:24And I flew to, I think it was like Virginia. I honestly don't even remember what state it was. I spent like three days. I stayed at her neighbor's house. Now, when I think about this, this whole situation is very weird. I paid a good chunk of change. Did I ever tell you this? I paid a really good chunk of change and she was helping me map out like my first digital launch ever. And it was for an Instagram program. And she basically like taught me. And like, when I think about it, my cortisol rises of like launching is like the world is ending. Like you need to like have, you know, your food ready and you're not going to sleep and your computer is going to be on your nightstand and everything's going to break.

46:03And like, it was this, like, I mean, it felt like you were going into war is like how she taught me it. and that was like very much her reality and it was so stressful and I did this first launch and she was kind of like mentoring me through it I honestly don't even know if she's still in the online space and like every like text all times a day like everything's breaking this is wrong we need to shut this thing down it was so stressful and like at the end of it I was just like is this even worth it like we hit the goal sure that's awesome but like this like I don't want to do this four times a year.

46:37Like, you know what I mean? Like just visualizing, like visualizing that. And I am really proud of myself for like shaking that off and being like, this is not my story. And this is not how I'm going to do this. And it took me a while. I'll be honest. It took me a while, but it's so interesting. Like when you learn from somebody and like, that's the headspace. And so I do think that like in the last five years, like launching is so fun. Things are always going to go wrong. And I feel like we have a very good system of like, whoops, let's recover. And there is no bitterness. There is no, like no one's getting slapped on the hand.

47:13Like it's very much just like beautiful, complex effort that we all recognize. And it just has changed everything. I was recently talking to Carrie on our team who has been with me basically since almost day one with launching. And she was just like, she's like, it's so fun. Like it's, you bring the fun back into it because it's like, again, we're not curing cancer. I wish we could, I wish that was what the work we were doing, but like at the end of the day, like we're serving people, we're imperfect and we're showing up. And so I think that's been a beautiful thing. And I do think to your point, Marissa, like one of the reasons why we work so well together is I'm more of like the free spirit creative one.

47:50And you're more of like, let's stay linear here. Let's stay on track. But I think that when we put us together and we can challenge that within one another. I think that's like a huge thing of growth as well. I couldn't agree more. I really couldn't. And it's a true statement friends that like nobody launches like us and that we really do launch with ease. Yeah. And joy. We do enjoy and fun and like, yeah, community with each other. Like it's not, it's, it's rare. It's not like others. It's very rare. And I want, if you're listening to this and you're like looking at people launching and then they're telling the behind the scenes about how awful it was, like there is a different way.

48:32There is a different way. And I think too, it's like, if your whole business model is around launching certain products or offers or services at certain times, and like you just dread it, like you've got to shift that because that is your business at the end of the day. Like that is it, what you've built. And so, yeah, that's really changed. The final thing that I think we should talk about, and I love your perspective on it is that one thing that I think you've helped me with so much and I've grown in so much over the last five years is that like as the visionary, it is so easy to get ideas. Like I could never run out of ideas.

49:08I have a million ideas. I am a machine. I am an idea machine. And I think that it is so good for people that are the creative visionary to have somebody in their life who is there to remind them. Last week, you said this thing was the priority has changed. Is it shifted? Let me know. And I think that's part of why you and I struggled at the beginning, because I was just like, I'd get so excited about an idea. And I would just like word vomit it and expect people to understand it, buy in, want to like drop what they're doing and go start this new idea. And Marissa would be the one that would be like, like, hold up, let me look at the calendar.

49:46Wait a minute, we have other priorities. And that was really hard for me at first, because like, I would just get so like that giddy, excited energy and then be like, Oh, maybe this idea wasn't it. But really, she was just keeping us on task. And so I think that I've gotten really good at honing in ideas, presentation of the idea, and the timing of the execution. Talk to me about this. oh my gosh I feel like I was the troll under the bridge in the beginning that was like no we can't do this and this is why here's xyz of why we cannot and then Jenna would be like here's xyz of why we can and one of the things I didn't quite understand is the excitement yeah you always had so much excitement about it but the way I perceived that excitement was like oh we're going to do these five things and we're just like, these are great.

50:38And like drop, we're just going to drop it and let's go. And that's like hive mind. And so for me, like my mind very much works in the way that like I go A, B, C, D, and I'm very good at like focusing and prioritizing what needs to happen and thinking through the big picture. And again, why we work so well together is you can give that idea. And then in my mind, I can see, okay, these are literally the steps that need to happen to get us there. And I think something that's beautiful about your human design and being a manifesting generator is that you can totally have these big ideas and you can bring them to fruition and you can make it happen.

51:16Sometimes what happens in that design is that you miss some of the details. And so we have to go back and we have to fix them. That's very frustrating for someone like me, who's very process oriented, system oriented, who wants to get through all of the dang details. And so we did have some sticking points with you having these beautiful, great ideas. And then me being like, this is not realistic that we can do all of these things. And I need you to figure out what you want. Yes. Yes. Oh, my God. That would be great. I mean, I'm pretty sure my team used to dread when I would like go to masterminds, because I'd come back with like a notebook full of like, and here are the 10 new things you're going to do.

51:58And it's so funny because now I come out of them with like clarity that I love what we're doing. Like, you know what I mean? Like I come out of them with like, we don't need to do anything. Like, I feel like we're on the path. And I think a lot of that too, is like getting quieter with myself and not adding complexity and not self-sabotaging, which I think a lot of founders do is like, I want more peace and ease, but I also want exciting and new. And it's like, Like, yeah, such a good job of getting really clear on not just like, what do we want the business to look like, but how do we want the day to day in the business to feel?

52:34And I think that really shifted things. And it also makes like those really like shiny ideas. When I start to think like Marissa now, we're all like put on my Marissa hat and be like, okay, this is a great idea. But if I have to do all of these things, am I willing to do those things? Do I want to really do that? Is that really in alignment with what we want? And it kind of like gives me that pause. And I feel like that even like a 10 second pause before presenting an idea for a creative visionary is like enough to like take a beat and be like, wait a minute. And so, man, we have grown so much.

53:10We have. And I also want to honor just on this last note here, too, that you have been so intentional and mindful around how you do take that beat. And now, too, you'll give me time to process it. Like you honor my like marination and that I really do need to think about a lot of different things where I feel like you are very quick. You're able to be quick in your decision making. And me again, it just takes a little time. So I just, again, want to honor that not only from a, hey, this is a communication standpoint, but getting that buy in with your ideas, with your team as a visionary and taking time to pulse check before you truly start rolling forward.

53:52Look at us. I'm so proud of us. I know. I know. Five years later, baby. Well, I hope that everyone loved this episode. It's been really fun to even just reflect. And maybe this is a reminder for any listener to just take a few minutes and really look at how you've changed. I think that there is something beautiful to be said about pausing and looking at the growth and the evolution and the challenges and the setbacks and the ways that you've shown up and overcome. and five years has felt like a blink, which is wild. So thank you for coming on, Marissa, and just walking through this with me and challenging me.

54:29And I just, I love what we've built together and I'm so proud of us. I love it too. Thank you for having me and just cheers to growth and good company. That's right. Until next time, gold diggers. Start digging your biggest goals. Boom, baby. I'm over here giving you a virtual high five because you just finished another episode of the Gold Digger Podcast. Did that go by way too fast for anyone else? If you want more, head over to golddiggerpodcast.com for show notes and all the discount codes from today's sponsors. And if you're looking for a new crew of movers and shakers like you to bounce ideas and ask questions, be sure to join my exclusive community for Gold Diggers on Facebook.

55:13The link's waiting for you at golddiggerpodcast.com.