784: Steal My Simple But Effective Work Wind-Down Routine

0:01This episode is supported by What Should I Do With My Money? From Morgan Stanley. Okay, can we just talk about how money is legitimately one of the hardest topics to bring up. Like even when you think you have your stuff together, there's always this really weird awkwardness around it. That's why I am obsessed with this podcast. It actually makes money conversations feel approachable. I recently listened to an episode about affording multiple big life things at once, like a wedding, a house, an IVF, if they were all happening at the same time. And honestly, it hit home. So many people are wondering, can we actually have it all without sacrificing our sanity or our savings?

0:42What I love is that they bring in real experts who help break down these massive costs into actual doable steps. It's like having a money mentor in your ear who gets it. Search for What Should I Do With My Money in your podcast player. We'll also include a link in the show notes. Many thanks to What Should I Do With My Money and Morgan Stanley for their support. One of the things I appreciate about my evening wind down routine is that like, I will not get bothered. Like no one is slacking me at 8 PM or 9 PM. Like unless we are in a launch, we have very, very strict boundaries, respecting time zones and people's personal life.

1:18And so I love that. Hey, my name is Jenna Kutcher and I am obsessed with all things, business, marketing numbers, and helping you to navigate both the messy and the magical seasons of this thing called life. I'm a small town mama who took a$300 camera, grew a successful photo biz, and now I work from home and run a seven figure online business. I teach you the tried and true secrets to building a career you adore. Shy away from the real talk? No way. Money, hardship, growth, loss, and marketing are all topics we discuss here. Think of this as your one-stop shop for happy hour with a gal pal mixed with business school.

1:52Pull up a seat, make sure you're cozy and get ready to be challenged and encouraged while you learn. This is the Gold Digger podcast. If you're anything like me, it can be really hard to pivot from work mode into life mode, especially if you're an entrepreneur and the work is quite literally never done. Now, over the past few years, I've incorporated a few key practices into my daily rhythms that have helped me be more present in my life, even when there are needs in the business. And I am like weirdly excited about today's episode. I don't think I'm the only one, but I am obsessed with hearing about other people's routines, whether it's their morning routine or their skincare routine.

2:30Like there is something so fun for me about visualizing that person's life in a more detailed way. And I always feel like I get a few new tips and tricks to try in my own life. So today I'm going to walk through and share my personal little work wind down routine with you, how I exit the workday and enter into life mode. And for me, mom mode with more ease and less tension. Let's dive on in. It's all a little overwhelming, isn't it? Help desk software, payment processing, email marketing tools, blogging platforms, SEO tools, deal management tracking. Gold Digger, take a deep breath because you don't need more tools to get more out of your business.

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3:50HubSpot.com. We've all caught glimpses at those memes where they talk about entrepreneurship in this way, where they say entrepreneurs are the only crazy people crazy enough to leave a nine to five in order to work 24 seven. And I think those are funny. They're laughable, especially at different stages of entrepreneurship. But I also think that they can be slightly harmful and set this expectation or standard that this is what you need to expect. And this is what you need to do as an entrepreneur. And if you followed for any amount of time, you definitely know that I am not a stranger to burnout.

4:26There have been so many seasons where I literally don't shut down, where I really struggle to turn off. And I know what it's like to feel like you have to work 24 seven, or the only way to earn more is to work more, or you're constantly connected, bringing your laptop up and your phone everywhere and the pings and the dings are giving you anxiety. And I just know all of that. It's not a good feeling and it's definitely not healthy. And for me, one of the biggest shifts in really wanting to create more space and more definition between my work and my life was becoming a mom. And it's really interesting because if you followed our story for any amount of time, before we had my oldest daughter, Coco, I had two miscarriages and they were two years apart.

5:12And in that stage of my business, I was totally in a stage of business where I was trading time to earn money. And the only way to make more money was to work more. And I learned so much in our waiting season. I always talk about how I just didn't waste that waiting season because it taught me so much. And it also allowed me the time while I was grieving to figure out what do I really want? Like, what do I want life to look like? What type of mom do I want to be? Like, could I even be the type of mom I want to be with the business the way it is? And the answer was no. And like, whoa, was that an awakening in so many different ways and so many challenging ways.

5:51But at the same time, I can really look back. And if I hadn't gone through such horrific and challenging loss, I don't think I would have challenged myself because, you know, on society's expectations, I was crushing it, right? I had built the six figure business. It was amazing. I was so proud of myself. I am still proud of myself, but that business wasn't sustainable. I've talked about how, you know, hustle is often required to get the dream off the ground. But if hustle is the only way that you can sustain it, then it's not the dream. And that was a huge realization that I had. And so when I finally held my daughter after three years of waiting, I really recognized the fact that I didn't want this life of like, when I'm working, I'm feeling guilty that I'm not with my kids.

6:37And when I'm with my kids, I'm thinking about the work that I should be doing. And in order to kind of alleviate some of that mom guilt, I had to get really clear on what mattered in my business, but also figure out how to shut off that mode of myself and really enter into like motherhood in the way that I wanted to and like be able to transition from work to motherhood in a really seamless way. And I have ADHD. I mean, my brain and my thoughts are like crazy and complex. And so trying to wrangle my thoughts often feels impossible. I remember when I was trying to learn how to meditate and I was like, wait, you're supposed to like not think.

7:15And I was like, that's impossible for me. And now I know meditation on a much different level, but you know, it's really, really hard. And I believe at the core of my being that we all desire to be more present, to be in our lives, to like fully experience the richness of life. But I also don't think that is possible when we don't have boundaries in place and rhythms in place and routines in place that allow us to kind of transition from one role into the next. It was really interesting because we have some dear friends and sometimes on Friday nights, we'll go over and have pizza with them. And we got over to their house the other day and my girlfriend was still at work.

7:52She's coming home and her husband was home with both of the kids. And I had this like weird moment of realization of like, wow, since I've been a mom, I have very much been bouncing back and forth between work and life and motherhood is sometimes within seconds. Right. You know, I exclusively nursed my daughters. And so like Drew would just like, come on into my office and drop off a baby. And then I'd feed him and then he would go. And, and while I had the amazing support of him being a stay at home dad. I was also like very deeply integrated into their rhythms and routines as a family, which was so beautiful.

8:25I have no regrets about that, but I also recognize no wonder I feel like I have a hard time transitioning from one role to the next because I would often do it, you know, within seconds at the drop of a hat. And so I have been leaning in as I feel like we are getting out of the weeds of that stage of life as parents, trying to figure out and really just anchor down this beautiful like wind down routine that allows me to just be fully present with my children, fully present with Drew, fully free of all the worries and thoughts and ideas and tasks that need to get done. And yeah, so let's dive in.

9:02Okay. So one of the things I was actually talking to my therapist about this, because I just said, you know, sometimes I feel like it takes my brain like 20, 30 minutes to like release the work stuff and get into life mode. And if you have limited amount of time with your kids, that's like wasted time, right? Where you're not totally there. You're there, but you're not there. Right. And so my therapist had talked about the importance of having something in your life that kind of signals to your body, to your brain, that this is a transition. And one of the things that I've done for years, and I've talked about it on the show is like, Whenever I enter a threshold into a room, I try to just take a second to ground myself of why am I here?

9:43What is my purpose for being here? So it's like, before I step into my office, my purpose today is to record this content for you. When I step into my living room, my purpose today is to be available for my children. And so I've done that. But one thing I was joking about with other friends who work from home is I was like, man, wouldn't it be nice to have a 10 minute commute, just like 10 minutes of like playing music or sitting in silence or sipping your coffee or like whatever that is to like gear up and get ready for work and to unwind and get done from work. And if you work from home, you don't have a commute.

10:15We were joking. We were like, maybe we should just get in our cars at the end of the day and like do a lap around the block just to like, you know, have that time. And that actually might be a great solution for people. And so, you know, my therapist, she'll take her dog on a walk around the block when she's done with her work before she enters into her life. And she challenged me because I am prone to work until the last minute and then just like shut my laptop and try to get in to life with my kids. And like, that's where I feel the most scattered. And so she's like, you know, how could you just set aside like five minutes, just like ground yourself to like transition.

10:47You could do a meditation. You could walk on the treadmill. You could go outside and put your feet in the grass. Like what does that transition look like? And so I'm still nailing it down perfectly. But one thing that I've been doing is every day Drew picks Coco up from school and he takes Quinn with him. And so that is kind of a time where the house is quiet. And so one of the things I've been doing is I've just started prepping dinner. I like put on music in the prepping of dinner. I'm not on my phone. I'm not on screens. And like, that has just been kind of a nice way to like serve my family, have things prepared when they get home and help my brain transition out of work mode.

11:21So something for you to think about is just like, what is something you could do every day to signal a transition of like the work is done, the life begins. Think about what that could be for you. Let's be real. As business owners, we know a reliable connection isn't optional. I've had my fair share of slow and lagging internet. And let me tell you, nothing kills your groove faster. It is the ultimate productivity killer. You can't process payments. You can't talk to clients and your team feels stuck waiting on you. Back when I started my business, I learned pretty quickly that things only run as smoothly as your connection does.

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13:16They've got ready-to-use templates, AI tools, and support available 24-7 so that selling stays simple even during the peak madness. And ShopPay's quick checkout, well, it's a game changer. It means way fewer abandoned carts and way more happy customers. This Black Friday, join the thousands of new entrepreneurs hearing for the first time with Shopify. Sign up for your free trial today at shopify.com slash gold digger. That's shopify.com slash gold digger. Go to shopify.com slash gold digger and make this black Friday one to remember. Okay. The next thing that has been so huge in terms of a routine is something that is just a part of our team culture.

13:58And I know that not everybody listening has a team or has the autonomy to dictate how your team functions, but we have very, very strict boundaries in our business around how we're communicated with about work. And I just want to encourage you. If you are someone who your phone stresses you out because you're worried that someone's going to be asking you something about work, figure out ways to get it so that you don't have that anxiety around your device. So we use Slack to communicate. We only use Slack. We have to ask permission to text because I recognize that oftentimes I could be working and then two minutes later, my kid could run in and I'm with my kid.

14:36And I just don't want my phone to be something that I'm tying to work. And again, I recognize it's not possible for everybody. But one of the things I appreciate about my evening wind down routine is that like, I will not get bothered. Like no one is slacking me at 8pm or 9pm. Like, unless we are in a launch, we have very, very strict boundaries respecting time zones and people's personal life. And so I love that. And we set slack statuses. So like, if you're offline, no one's going to bother you. If you have like, you know, I'm getting lunch from this hour to this hour, nobody will ping you then just to like give people more space in their life.

15:11And so that's one thing that really helps. So one of the things I've been doing is here's kind of how the evening goes. So typically I'll finish work around 430 or five. And that is when the kids are home. We have a solid hour, hour and a half of just like playtime. So last night we were outside. We got this cute little playhouse and swing set. Coco and I were like running laps in the yard and we were pretending that we had a cafe and like, that's just like our playtime, like get energy out connection time. Then we feed the kids dinner. And a lot of times we will feed them dinner and eat separately.

15:45I know this is not a hot take for us. Like when we all eat together, it just always feels slightly chaotic where it's like, the kids need this. We're doing this. Like we're not there. We're there, but we're not there. And so half of the week we'll eat with our kids. Half of the week we actually eat after they go to bed. then six o 'clock we watch one episode of bluey so it's one episode they're eight minutes long every night the kids ask for an extra one i'm like i'm like babes one episode that we know mom and then we bring them upstairs and usually we divide and conquer for bedtime so drew will take one kid i'll take the other and then we switch so that we get time with each girl before they go to bed and typically speaking they are sleeping and in bed between seven and seven thirty so it's actually pretty awesome.

16:29And then if we haven't eaten yet, that's when we eat. So last night, Drew made steaks and asparagus and potatoes and him and I had that together, which was just much more relaxing and nice. And then him and I will either watch a TV show or we'll go down in sauna or we'll just like relax. But one of the things that I do is once I put the kids to bed, this is so funny. I do turndown service in our bedroom. So if you don't know what turndown services. If you stay at a very fancy hotel, I'm talking like Four Seasons, Ritz-Carlton, they do this thing called turndown service. It's so unnecessary and also amazing.

17:06So they go into your room before it's bedtime and they'll pull your sheets down. Sometimes they'll put a pillow on your bed. They'll get your room ready. They'll like close all the curtains. They like make an environment for sleep. And so once I finished bedtime with the girls, I go into our bedroom and I prepare our bedroom for bedtime. Now, this is also a time of transition for me from motherhood into wife and into an individual human. And I love doing this because it also feels like a gift for my future self, right? Like when I come upstairs after watching a show or reading a book or whatever, I get to just climb into bed.

17:44It's already ready for me. So I'll close our curtains. I'll pull down our sheets. I'll take our throw pillows off of our bed. I turn on my white noise. I get my diffuser filled. I have this now foods diffuser. I love they have eucalyptus and lavender. I do a mix of essential oils. I get the diffuser going. I turn our lamps on super dim and I basically just set the environment for a rest filled night. Now I'm doing this at seven o 'clock. We don't go to bed at seven, but this again, just helps me transition from being with the kids into like, okay, slowing down, just being grounded and enjoyment.

18:20I also do my skincare at this time. This has been such a game changer for me. I know this might sound silly, but spending five minutes by myself doing my skincare one, not only I would argue it helps the products actually sink into your skin better before you like go and lay on a pillow. But two, again, a gift to my future self. When it's 9.30 and I'm tired, I don't want to do my full skincare routine. So if I do it at seven o 'clock, man, I do it well and it gives my skin time to absorb. So kids go to bed, I do turndown service in our bedroom, and then I go into my bathroom and I do my skincare and I do it slowly and I just enjoy it.

18:59And again, it just feels like a gift to myself. It feels like self-care in a way of like, okay, come back to you. you know, you've been a boss, you've been an entrepreneur, you've been a mom, you're about to be a wife, but this is your time. And so I love that. So I love Primally Pure. I've also been trying, I've only ever talked about use Primally Pure for the last seven years. I also found this product, One Skin, it's called, it's a peptide cream and it's supposed to help like reverse age your skin. So I do my whole Primally Pure and then I finish with One Skin. They also have a really good SPF.

19:32So I'm testing out a few other products. And so, yeah, I do my skincare and that's when then I come down and I'm like just way more present and grounded for Drew. I also used to never be a pajamas girl. Let me tell you, I am a huge fan of pajamas. Now I used to sleep in like sweatpants and like old t-shirts. There is something about a matching pair of PJs and like that, like soft material. It just hits different. I swear to you. My two favorite pajama brands are nudes, N-U-U-D-S. And my friend Mallory Ervin has a line called In My Sundays. I've been meaning to try, there's a brand called, I think, Eberjay.

20:10But let me just tell you, actual pajamas, they feel more luxurious. They help regulate my temp. They just really set the stage. So you don't need to go out and buy pajamas, but I'm just telling you, if you don't have one pair of nice pajamas, it might be something you want to invest in. So kids go to bed, turn down service, skincare, get into my PJs. One of the things I'm really proud of us for is that we have this box. I've talked about it on the podcast before. It's called the RO box, A-R-O box. And basically our phones go in them from like 5 PM until 7 AM. Like most nights, we are getting 12 plus hours of our phones just being plugged in, in our box.

20:53So this box is so cool. It's just this cute little white box with a wood top has chargers in it. We have it in our pantry. So it's like not even really accessible. And whenever we are with our kids, we put our phones in the box and it has just been such a beautiful habit. So like, I don't even touch my phone until Coco goes off to school. So she doesn't see mom on her phone at all in the morning when she gets home. She doesn't really see me on my laptop or my phone, but that box is so nice. And what's been so cool is when you put your phone in it, it tracks your time that you're off of your phone.

21:24And it's so fun because it'll send you these little like notifications, these little dopamine hits of like, you just earned back 12 hours of your life. I'm like, that is awesome. So we put our phones in the box. They stay in the box until the morning. Sometimes we get a little, we like scroll before we head up to bed, but I would say we do very, very well. And our RO time would argue that for us because you can't cheat it. It tracks it. And so Drew and I really try to just stay off of our devices and wind down. And there's just so much science to behind like if you're looking at screens and lights and all these things of how your brain no wonder our brains feel overwhelmed so having that box has just been so great for us as a family it's been such a challenge and it's fun because you can like compete against your partner of like who can have their phone in the box more so we always tease each other because sometimes i'll like grab drew's phone to look up a recipe and is like are you just trying to get more ro time i'm like guilty as charged we try to go to bed like so my dream scenario is that we're up in our bedroom at like nine falling asleep by 930.

22:23Most of the time we're heading up to our bed closer to 930 and we're asleep by 10. But we do not stay up late. Like when people tell me that they stay up late and watch Netflix and stuff, I do not resonate. It does not work for me. I love sleep. And I think now that we're coming out of the weeds in parenthood, and we're actually getting pretty decent sleep, I like recognize how sleep deprived we were for so many years. And so yeah, we love to like control the controllables. And one of the controllables with sleep is like what time you go up to bed. So we don't have any devices in a room except for Kindles.

22:52We love to read. I read before bed every single day. I have not skipped a day. I will never forget my sister's bachelorette party years ago. And we like got back from being out partying. It was like three in the morning and somebody walked in the room. They're like, what are you doing? And I was like reading in my Kindle. I'm like, this is just how I fall asleep. I don't do business books. I only read for pleasure. I'm not looking at like personal development or anything that will get my wheels turning or fire me up. I just love reading for fun. So here are a few of my recent reads. I read The Women by Kristen Hanna.

23:22Super good. Really, really enjoyed it. Anything by Freedia McFadden. She is fantastic. She did The Housemaid, The Teacher, The Wife Upstairs. Drew, my mom, and I are all reading her books and then discussing. And so we have almost like a little mini book club. And they're just really good page turners. I'm currently reading a book called The Most Fun We ever had. But I just love that like wind down routine. And I think what's so interesting is that when we look at routines and like transitioning from like work to life, we really just have to figure out ways that we can honor the slowdown and release things and not hold on to things because especially as entrepreneurs, the work is never done.

24:04So whether you like have a notepad where you write down your ideas so that you can release them and not like go take immediate action, or you can set better boundaries. I just think this can be a really great way for you to transition into more presence in your life, whatever role it is you're playing. I like have loved just incorporating these little routines into my life and day because I feel like these transitions feel a lot easier and it feels a lot better for me to not feel like, Oh, you know, I should just crack my computer and do one more email or, Oh, I need to get back to that one person who texted me.

24:41It just has created a little bit more of a boundary around my life. And I feel like I'm also just way more present for my life. So take what serves you from my routine. Maybe try something new. Maybe try a little turndown service. Make your room feel all four seasonsy, even if it doesn't look anything like it. But think about your environment, what you can control and how you can transition better. And I think that will all be better for it. I hope you enjoyed this episode. This is so fun. a little departure from the marketing, but I mean, this is also very important work that we're doing here.