787: Get RICH: In Business, Relationships, and Life

0:00And so I think unshakable self-belief comes in having higher belief, getting a higher vision, so that you have to challenge yourself each day to remember how unique and exquisite you really are. And that's a daily, it's a daily bath. Hey, my name is Jenna Kutcher and I am obsessed with all things, business, marketing numbers, and helping you to navigate both the messy and the magical seasons of this thing called life. I'm a small town mama who took a$300 camera, grew a successful photo biz, and now I work from home and run a seven figure online business. I teach you the tried and true secrets to building a career you adore.

0:36Shy away from the real talk? No way. Money, hardship, growth, loss, and marketing are all topics we discuss here. Think of this as your one-stop shop for happy hour with a gal pal mixed with business school. Pull up a seat, make sure you're cozy, and get ready to be challenged and encouraged while you learn. This is the Gold Digger Podcast. I'm sure if you're listening to this, you are someone who would love to make more money in your business. But I think even deeper down than that desire is this desire to make an impact. And if I asked you, are you someone who truly wants to make a difference in this world, I bet you are nodding your head right now.

1:12And maybe you're wondering, well, how do you do that? My guest today is about to prove to you that in order to profit bigger, you need to live bigger. And in order to live bigger, you need to believe bigger, both in yourself, in your gifts, and in your potential. Marshawn Evans Daniels is a reinvention strategist, an influence expert, and a bestselling author who makes emerging and established women influencers of faith do just that. Believe more so they can make more so that they can ultimately give more. Featured regularly on CNN, Fox Business, and ESPN, her client roster includes HP, Home Depot, Ernst & Young, Delta, Tiffany & Co., Nike, Rolls Royce, and NFL and NBA athletes.

1:55So yes, my friend is a really big deal. Marshawn's book and corresponding 100-day devotional Believe bigger, discover the path to your life purpose is all about resilience, reclaiming your life and how God uses rejection, hardship and unexpected circumstances to awaken something greater within. But only if you are willing to embrace disruption, whether you are drowning in self-doubt and regret, feeling stuck or sensing a shift, but unable to discern what's next. This conversation is for you. You'll hear Marshawn outline her purpose map, which are five stages of divine reinvention, which will give you insight into your true gifts and calling and give you the courage to pursue it.

2:37By the end of this conversation, you'll see that difficulties are not designed to devastate you, but to ignite your bigger dreams, your bigger life, your bigger love, and more abundance that you were destined for all along. I can't wait for you to hear this conversation. It is so powerful. Marshawn, welcome to the Gold Digger Podcast. More to do is less time and an infinite number of tools to keep track of. Gold Diggers, do you ever feel like doing business has never felt harder? Well, the good news is you don't need a miracle to hit your goals. You just need HubSpot. Their all-in-one customer platform can make growing your business so much easier.

3:17Imagine this. High quality leads, fast closing deals, wildly happy customers, and more benchmark breaking quarters. It's not a miracle. It's HubSpot. Visit HubSpot.com to get started today. That's HubSpot.com. So Marshawn, you emphasize this huge level of importance about achieving these massive dreams. Like you are a gold digger at your core. And I want to know, and I want to kick off with some practical steps that our listeners could take to start cultivating this unshakable self-belief because I've met you in real life and I think you have it in such a beautiful way, but not only do you have it, I think you can teach it.

4:01Well, I think that's such a great place to dive in because I firmly believe that we are here to live a life worthy of the calling we've received, but it's hard to make decisions in alignment with a higher calling, which leads to higher purpose, higher prosperity, higher level relationships, higher love, all of these things at a higher dimension. I think it's impossible to do that with confidence alone. I think what you need, I call it Godfidence, which is a combination of understanding who you are, whose you are, how you've been made, how you've been wired, because otherwise we're relying on ourselves.

4:35And we've got a lot of cracks in our foundation, which is not a bad thing. It gives an opportunity for us to actually give ourselves the challenge to believe bigger than what we've been through, what we're going through, who we've told we're supposed to be, who we couldn't be, all of these things. And so I think the first and foremost thing is recognizing that you're not here by yourself, that you have a higher purpose, and it's going to take courage to live a life worthy of the calling you've received. I think the second thing is vision. We all need a vision that causes us to rise up. And I think the number one thing that women are struggling with today is not low esteem.

5:13It's not even a lack of confidence. I think it's vision that's not worthy of the caliber of our life. It doesn't ask us to rise up. And so we get caught in these airbrush lives on social media. We get caught up in thinking that even our businesses are our purpose, which is not true. It's dirty and filthy to make purpose about a paycheck. Now, what is it that I'm really here for. I am the embodiment of my purpose, but I need to get a vision. I need to tap into a vision that calls me higher, that invites the man that I want to meet one day to meet the highest version of me, that calls my clients to see the highest version of me so that they can be the highest version of themselves.

5:53And so I think unshakable self-belief comes in having higher belief, getting a higher vision so that you have to challenge yourself each day to remember how unique and exquisite you really are. And that's a daily, it's a daily bath. Yeah. Daily bath for that. Oh my gosh. I, okay. Let's break some of this down. Cause I just think this is so powerful. And one of the things that I love is how you tie your work to a much deeper purpose. And I think that there are a lot of people listening right now and they're thinking, and they're including this word that you and I both don't like, which is I'm just, I am just a photographer.

6:31I am just a mom. I am just a massage therapist. How does this connect to a bigger purpose? And, and I want to say this with so much grace, because I think that a lot of people, we are passionate about what we do, right? But when you put that purpose in what your job is, and maybe you don't love what you're doing, where does that leave us? Like, where do we go from here? Yeah, I think, you know, a word that can really anchor us in, I think is the word mission. and realizing that if you're in an army or in the military, look, I grew up around two brothers, eight male cousins. I used to manage NFL and NBA players.

7:09So he's a lot of masculine terminology. So stick with me. But if you're in the military, you're not going to be in the same position your entire time in the military. You're going to come in, you're going to learn a few things in the beginning season. As you get better, you grow in rank. And I think that's how we have to look at life as well too. You're not going to be a general, a captain on day one, but there is going to be a time that the reason that you started in basic training is for the purpose of leadership. And I think that for women, we've got to understand we are called to lead. We are also first generation wealth creators now.

7:42So we don't have the examples that men have had. Our names have not been associated with leadership. So what they have been associated with is motherhood, with reproduction, with marriage, with love, with finding Prince Charming, and then allowing the man to write the checks, bring home the bacon, which actually is also masculine because he had to go out and shoot the pig to begin with. So all of these things that have not been associated with us, but here's the deal. So one of the things in my book, Believe Bigger, I wrote that book. I had just come out of doing an event called Speak for Pay, where we're working with people to build world-class speakers, to build a world-class income.

8:19And we made$2 million in one hour. And I felt God say, I want you to step away. And I was like, I'll be a couple of months. I didn't know I wasn't as healthy as I was. And I didn't know that it would be a few years. I wrote this book. And what I realized over the last, you know, previous six years that I'd been working with women in the trenches is I saw this pattern. And I would talk about it on stage in these business environments. And so I put this framework together called the purpose map. And it walks you through these five stages of divine reinvention. I think if we as women understood that where we are is where we are supposed to be here, but it doesn't mean that there's not a there.

8:58So that first stage is called discovery. This is where you learn the rules. This is where we get shoulded on who we're told who we're supposed to be. This is where our identity around gender, around our roles, around what's appropriate. This is where we get shoulded on. Here's who you should be. Right. And then in the second stage talent, this is where most of us as women get stuck because this is where we, in first stage, we ask, who am I supposed to be? And the second question we ask, who did I decide to be? We climb all these mountains, motherhood, marriage, the mending mountain, making a difference.

9:30And for me, my mountain was the money mountain because I didn't think that I was going to be chosen as a wife or even maybe even be a mom because people said, because I was ambitious that obviously I didn't want that. So for me, I was just a business girl or just a person who made A's or just a girl who got scholarships or just that. But we couldn't see the multifacetedness. The problem is when we climb these mountains and we claim these titles, these titles become idols. We worship them. And these labels we put on themselves, they become fables. These stories we tell ourselves. So now we worship this position of motherhood or the job, the paycheck, the man or the kids.

10:10But what happens when he leaves? What happens when they grow up? And what happens when the job says, we don't need you anymore? We don't know who we are, but those things are necessary. And so things come into our lives. For me, I was engaged. It was infidelity. It came into my life and it split me up with this older version of success. And I was like, things like this don't happen to me because I make all the right decisions. How did I find myself here? And I realized that I had an addiction to success. I would never step into real mission because I was so focused on achievement and ambition.

10:44Most women right now, Jenna, who are listening to this and the reason why people love you so much is because you meet them in this middle stage called the gap. And the gap is in between our comfort zone, which some of us don't even know we're in because it's been successful and it's been challenging. The comfort zone doesn't mean that it's easy, but it does mean that it's time for you to leave this season of life. And with infidelity, I was engaged and I called my wedding off six days before my wedding because I found out my fiance was cheating on me while he was on the plane coming to Atlanta for wedding week.

11:18It was such a dramatic thing that it brought me to my knees to say like, why am I here? How did I end up here? And I think this is where your real mission begins is when the oldest version of you ends and it catches you off guard and you're gonna doubt everything about your worth, your readiness, your beauty, your goodness. You're gonna question if the sky is blue, but then when you push through that and there's some things you can do to shift out of that, there's a whole nother dimension called the glory zone where we step out of this gap into our gifts and ultimately into influence. And this is what every woman is supposed to go through.

11:56The problem is no one told us that we were more than just that and that we were actually here to lead from the very beginning. And I think when you see this purpose map, you'll be able to say like for people who remember what malls are or still go to actual malls. Yes. You know, there's that place in the middle of the mall with the red dot that says you are here. If you could just see where you are now and you could realize, oh, this didn't happen to me. It happened for me because something that's inside of me that I believe God is trying to bring out through me. And you need somebody to tell you that.

12:31And you need someone to remind you that this is not all that there is and that it's really an awakening. And I think that's what we're seeing happening with women right now. But I don't think we always have the language for it. And that was a very long answer. No, that was a beautiful answer. And oh my gosh, could I not agree more in that? there is something happening, an uprising. I mean, we see it amongst our peers. We see it in our communities. We see it in our friend groups. I just think that women right now, and I think there are so many catalysts in it. I think coming out of COVID and like, okay, did I appreciate the slowness?

13:09What do I want to bring back in? Now it's like, holy crap, life is moving fast again. And where do I want to be? And what is my purpose in this season? And all of these different things, the more conversations I have with women, the more women are being honest about like, I don't know if I want to keep doing what I'm doing. And I don't really know where I want to go. And so you said there are some things you can do to help ease the transition. Let's talk about those because I think a lot of us need them right now. And just that fear of like letting the old identity die so that the newness can begin.

13:44Like that's terrifying and also wildly exciting. So So walk us through that. Yeah. So after I called my wedding off and the engagement, and it was a very public wedding, I had been on The Apprentice. I had been also managing NFL and NBA players. I spent the highest paid defensive end in the NFL as my first client in my 20s. Then Rolls Royce was my next client. Then Tiffany and Company, Nike and Gatorade, all within the first few months. I am two years out of law school. I've never done this before. And I didn't know I had a natural gifting around this. And I thought meeting this man was the sign that I was on the right path, my faithfulness to God and making the right decisions.

14:25All of that came crumbling down. But what I really discovered is that there are versions of ourselves. I now call them our shadow. And I know a lot of people talk about shadow work. I'm not really a student of that per se. But the shadow I'm talking about is the part of you that just is with you all the time because you cannot see the shadow without the sun. and the versions of me, I had been in Miss America, I had been on the show, The Apprentice. I had this sports career. I was fastest growing woman on a sports agency in the country in less than a year. And I was an achiever. So the shadow looked really good.

14:59And I had to ask God, like, why did I end up here? And I think this is a question that we're really afraid to ask. Not why did this happen to me, but why did I end up here? I think the first thing of stepping out is asking the right question. Yeah. It's asking the right question, not asking from a victim, but asking from a place. Even if it's messy to dare to believe that you're really loved and needed and specifically chosen and you're here. Because I had at least that much belief because I'm like, God, we've been doing this walk for a long time. And I know you love me. And I know you know how much I love you.

15:34So I know this is not what you have for me as a destination. but clearly you've got me here for a reason. How did I end up here? Also wasn't, what did he do? It was, how did I choose this person? What eyes did I not have? Because this was a Monday morning before a Saturday wedding. And then so Sunday morning, people are getting ready to leave. They already had their plane tickets. You know, we're talking about dresses already paid for dresses, plural cakes, flowers, photographers, weddings are expensive, very expensive. We'll I'm leaning up against this vehicle, this luxury vehicle that my then fiance purchased for me.

16:12And now I don't know how I'm going to afford because I closed my business down, my sports agency down to become a bonus mom to his three children. And God whispered something to me. He said, you're going to change the lives of women like never before. And in my heart, I was like, one, couldn't you have sent me a memo? This is pretty dramatic to get me a message. I know where my prayer closet is. We talk every day. But then two, I was like, I don't like women. The person I am now, there was not a version of who I was that would have had a heart to do the work that I do today. And I didn't know what God meant, but I knew that he meant it.

16:50And so when I asked God, why did this happen to me? It wasn't that to me question. It was as honest as I could say. It's like, God, what do you need me to know? That was just the beginning of a journey of discovery. So I think the first thing is to ask these questions from a place, so of knowing your love, because if you ask the question from a lower dimension, a lower frequency of victimhood, then you're going to get an answer that may not be from above, but there is voices. There are voices that come into us that keep us down. And so, but today, you know, on the other side, as I was coming out of that, I realized if other people looked at my life, they would say I was unfocused because I've done a lot of different things and that at a young age.

17:30And so I came up with the title of reinvention strategist. I was speaking at an event, keynote talk. And I remember before the keynote, I was in the hotel room. I had to go upstairs because I just, it was still very fresh after the breakup. So I'm crying before, but I said something on stage and I said, you know, it's not about changing who you are. It's about changing what you do so that you can be who you are. And then God started talking to me about reinvention while I was at the airport at this one keynote talk. And I said, I'm going to teach women about reinvention. And this is why I am not sure what is next in my own life.

18:07And so I think the biggest thing is to ask the right questions, believe that you're loved. And then when you see people, when you hear podcasts like this, when you see people online, not just when you are voyeurism and like just looking at people, But when you see something that stirs something inside of you, lean into that because there's a lot of junk out here and there's a lot of superficial and a lot of things that will just make you stay in a place of wanting. But lean into the voices, read books that help you. I call it make your baby leap that cause something new inside of you to rise up.

18:41And that's where you can I call it a burning bush moment also. Like if you're going to walk towards the burning bush, that's only because you got to be curious. So if you're not curious, you don't ask the right questions. You can't step into what's in your promised land. Your promised land is always on the other side of a burning bush. That's what you do for people, Jenna. That's really my goal is to spark this curiosity that allows a new destiny to come in. Okay, it is officially that time of year. And if you run a business, you know the holiday rush is no joke. I've done more Black Fridays than I can count at this point.

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21:13Visit spectrum.com forward slash free for life to learn how you can get business internet free forever. Restrictions apply services not available in all areas. I am obsessed with this. And I, I am someone who is so much like you, Marshawn. I think that's why we connected is, you know, we have that like masculine energy of just like that push, like we could push and work ourselves to any solution. But we also have this like multi passionate, like excitement about life of like, I could do this, and I could do this, and I could do this, and I could do this. And that's exciting to us. Or I think some people would be like, this is way too overwhelming.

21:54But I also love this idea of reinvention, because I think both you and I, if anyone asked us, like, where will you be in five years? It's like, I have no idea. I literally, I couldn't tell you. Do you feel that way? Or is that just me? Cause I'm like, I don't know what I'm doing tomorrow. So I like not having to know what I'm doing. That's part of deciding and knowing yourself. But when you and I met, it was such a beautiful experience for me because you asked the question around, you know, leaving things behind. And I feel like I'm in this reset stage, Yeah. Which when you have, I've been in the high end business coaching space for 14 years.

22:34Yeah. That's like in dog years. You're like a grandma. Yeah. I get my hair colored now almost every time I go every two weeks at this point. And I realized with some of the younger ones, like, yeah, I, when I tell them that I'm like, you were in high school or elementary school when I started. Okay. But here's the thing. It is very humbling to not know what your next is, but here other things come into your life that require you to change your priorities. So for me mentioned, I was a bonus mom when I was previously engaged. I met a different wonderful man. Let me clarify. So you don't send hate mail to the man you see me posting online.

23:12Now, this is, this is, this is a long time ago. I guess 13 or so years ago, but the man that I married now, Jack, his name is actually Jack Daniels. We had three children in six minutes in 2020. I gave birth to triplets in 2020 at the beginning of the pandemic with no toilet paper, no Clorox wipes. People didn't even know where to find a mask. There's all the rage about masks. I thought I was going to have to deliver my children without my husband because that's how strict the restrictions were in the hospitals. And so that changed my life. When I say 2020 was a year of miracles, I released a devotional called a hundred days of believing bigger with six month old triplets.

23:52I'm writing that while the doctors are telling us we have a 4 % likelihood of even going full term. They just turned four years old this past week. All help, like so miraculously healthy. And I don't want to squander that miracle on my old identity of even my reinvented identity of helping people. Because when God said, when I was at that, leaning on that car that the ex had purchased for me. He said, you're going to change the lives of women like never before. I realized now he was talking about my girls. All this time, everything I've been able to do with helping women to step into becoming millionaires, find their voice, elevate their visibility, get on TV, get book deals, like awesome.

24:36But, but it was practice for my three girls. Right. And so when you and I met, you looked at me and you just like broke me down. It was just a look. And you said, you only have a little bit more time before they're off to school, you know? And I could see the love and the intention in your eyes. And it was, and this is why women with similar experiences, it's not the same of hearing it from a woman who's not in business who tells you that, right? But you being in business, you building at such a high level in a really short period of time. And by the way, y 'all, if you ever get to sit in a space with Jenna, you know, I'm like, Jenna, when are you going to like have a live event or something?