Totally Extra: West Ham 06/07 - Tevez, Mascherano, Pards & Curbs

0:00The Athletic FC

0:30the beggar belief it all adds up to one of the weirdest seasons the premier league's ever seen

0:43friday 17th of october hello duncan alexander hello james welcome to a totally extra welcome benji laniado ceo of pick fair benji hey jimbo i just thought i'd remind you of that oh no thank you thank you this is like what's Pickfair say again what's Pickfair oh Pickfair it's just probably the best online platform for launching a photography store or website or portfolio well that's handy yeah you're CEO of Pickfair yeah that's the one you could have been CEO of West Ham well yes I got is this real yeah this is real I was outbid by Golden Sullivan by by how much I think maybe 80 million pounds 80 so close yeah yeah yeah But I was in the running nonetheless.

1:30What year was this? This would have been 2008 because the global financial system was crumbling. There were administrators who were kind of running the process because the owners of West Ham were in a lot of financial trouble. And I emailed in. I emailed in, I did. Did they reply? No, I showed proof of funds, which was I think£350 at Nationwide Branch Crouch End. Ah, bad job. And said some very nice words about Iceland in my email, which I thought could help. Didn't respond to me. But in some of the write-ups post-deal, it was revealed that the only other bidder was an enterprising fan. That's extraordinary.

2:10Is part of you quite relieved that your bid wasn't accepted? I hadn't given much thought to an actual tenure as owner of West Ham. Right. But I like to think I would have brought passion. and not many pounds. Not many pounds. Yeah. And 350 pounds may sound a paltry amount to some. This is 2008. Ken Bates bought Chelsea for a pound. Right. I mean, the Glazers bought Man United for a lot less than a pound. Minus money, if anything. Yeah. So, all right, Benji, well, who knows? Maybe one day we'll be doing a totally extra about the incredible season that the Hammers have under the CEO of Pickfair.

2:52One day. One day, Jimbo. Hmm. All right. Normally we have chat about restaurants and that at the start of the show, but that was lovely. That was lovely. We also normally get a quiz question from you, Duncan. What have you got today? I've got a bit of a two-parter, if you want. So you can either, people can play both. But part one would be, who am I? Okay. I am a former West Ham player. Oh, yeah. I played in both the 1992-93 season, the first Premier League season, and the 2006-07 season, the one we're looking at. I had one cap for England and I played quite a pivotal role in the relegation battle of this very 2006-07 season.

3:30Who am I? Well, I imagine that clues might be scattered throughout today's show. You mentioned it being a two-parter though, Duncan. Yeah, just if anyone found that too easy slash too hard. What about the only two players to play in 2006-07 who also appeared in the Premier League last season, 2024-25? What, not just for West Ham but in general? In general, yeah. Just two players. Well, one of them's going to be James Milner. One of them is always James Milner, yeah. So who's the other one? Well, answers at the end of the show. Excellent! Well, we've got a whole bunch to talk about today. Really looking forward to our chat about West Ham and that remarkable season.

4:10But first up, we're going to open up the almanac. This week in football history, Manchester United became the first English club to compete in what was then called the Intercontinental Cup, forerunner of the World Club Cup, etc. This was back in 1968, though, when they took on Estudiantes. They drew 1-1 within Estudiantes' side, featuring Juan Ramon Varon, father, of course, of one, Sebastian Varon, later to turn out for the Red Devils. Man United losing the tie, though, 2-1. United, Manchester United have lost it, 1-0. Incredible scenes on the pitch now. as supporters of Estudiantes come onto the field.

4:53The reserve players, the manager, the technical staff, all on there delightedly cheering the crowd. There's Bobby Charlton, a great sportsman even in defeat. October 18th, which is actually the day this podcast will go out, in 1992, that was the day that Ian Rush became Liverpool's all-time top scorer and, through a weird coincidence, also the day in 2005 that Thierry Henry became Arsenal's all-time top scorers and both Rush and Henry still lead the way for their respective clubs at the time of recording. Rosenthal, around Bruce, Ronnie Rosenthal, Ian Rush. It's a moment of history for the man now confirmed as Liverpool's greatest striker.

5:41Also this week, October 14th, back in 2018, that was the day that the great Peter Brackley left us. has there ever been a better football commentator? I'm sure everyone's got their own favourites but Duncan, you're shaking your head. I'd agree. Yeah, he was the best. Just the best. Good play again from Lazio. Dangerous ball towards Rabanelli. What a good finish too. Oh, he rolled back the ears there. Rabanelli. Very good. All right then. Well, miss you Peter. But thanks for all the good times and let's get on to 2006-2007. This is the Totally Football Show with James Richardson, part of the Athletic FC podcast network.

6:30The year, listener, is 2006. It's the year that the words Borat and Mankini first entered this world. High five! And Australian wildlife presenter Steve Irwin departed it. It was the year that social media platform Twitter was launched. Don't look for it, it's not there anymore. It was the year of Arctic Monkeys. I want to bet that you look good on the transfer. Amy Winehouse, the year the BBC News tried to interview IT expert Guy Cuny on live TV, but instead put on Guy Goma, a man who'd been sitting in reception waiting for a job interview. Were you surprised by this verdict today? I'm very surprised to see this verdict to come on me, because I was not expecting that.

7:10When I came, they told me something else, and I'm coming. you got to United United. So it was a big surprise anyway. A big surprise. Exactly. Yes, yes. 2006 was the year of the World Cup in Germany, which Italy not only qualified for, but somehow won. While in the Premier League, the 2006-07 season was proper Man United. Rooney and Ronaldo powering past defending champions Chelsea for a ninth Premier League title. Wayne Rooney now for Manchester United. Oh, that's lovely. By far the most interesting story that season in the Premier League was the one that was happening in East London and concerns Benji, your West Ham United.

7:49Now, summer of 2006, your club had just finished ninth, top half of the table the previous season. You got to that FA Cup final where, but for Stevie G, etc. and so on. You qualified for the UEFA Cup. Things were looking good with Alan Pardew. What were fans expecting for the season ahead? I mean, there was definitely a bit of a come-down post-FA Cup final, But I think everyone was pretty proud with how we'd equipped ourselves in that game, minutes away from winning the FA Cup. And the team had been pretty consistent and the XI pretty predictable throughout that season. And therefore, I think we were going into the new season thinking, you know, a couple of upgrades, similar levels of consistency and predictability, and then we should be on our way.

8:30A couple of upgrades like perhaps Carlton Cole, who arrived from Chelsea, Rob Green from Norwich City, and Lee Boyo returning from Newcastle United. And then, Duncan, then on deadline day. Yeah, possibly the most surprising double swoop in Premier League history. I remember being at work at the time and no one could believe it. It just made no sense that West Ham United had signed not only Javier Mascherano, but also Carlos Tevez. Two men we'd just seen in the World Cup that summer turning out for Argentina. With all due respect, they had no business being at West Ham. Yeah, it's definitely a remember where you were moment.

9:10I was walking past the Foxtons on Muswell Hill roundabout because that's when every Foxtons had a Sky Sports News telly, like piping out, and I saw it through the window. And then my phone started ringing and it was my friends and family saying, what on earth is going on? And it was completely and utterly ridiculous and thrilling. It was so exciting because I think Tevez had also been very good at the World Cup. I think he'd been named South American Player of the Year. They might have to fact check that. Either way, he'd done amazingly well at Corinthians. And there he was with his mate Mascherano, standing either side of Alan Pardew on Sky Sports News.

9:47It's extraordinary.

9:52He certainly is in the middle, in the middle of two World Cup world-class players and in the middle of an intrigue. How and why was the deal done so suddenly, unexpectedly and cheaply? incredible starstruck the pair of them it was a deal that was shrouded in mystery one line of the announcement all other aspects of the transfer will remain confidential and undisclosed aroused well provoke one or two raised eyebrows and of course within months some of those details would be disclosed with dramatic consequences i'm no lawyer but i would suggest putting that in the in the nothing to see here whatsoever.

10:32Does this look weird? Well, it definitely isn't. The other mystery, by the way, was Pardew, in the first training session, asked them both, where do you play? He didn't know. He didn't know that Mascherano was a midfielder and Teva's a striker. Well, I can see how a manager might wish to, you know, take on board what the, because sometimes a player has been, especially with a national side, used to turning out in a position, but they feel actually they do better elsewhere. Anyway, Alan Pardew, we'll touch on him and his unique managerial style presently. But for now, Benji West Ham fans found themselves in dreamland.

11:03It was an extraordinary moment and just an extraordinary season. You sort of started with this kind of optimism and hope and by the end of it, there was so many random moments. Nigel Riococca on MTV Cribs, Carlton Cole and Carlos Tevez at the Embassy Casino in London, Hayden Mullins legitimately keeping Javier Macerano out of the West Ham line-up and eventually even the anti-terrorism act of 2001 was involved with West Ham due to this whole sort of scenario. But it was... I'll explain that later. Okay. It was initially incredibly exciting. I was 22 at the time and this was one of the most exciting moments of my West Ham life.

11:43I mean, what I find amusing is that the season started with a 3-1 homing against Jarsan Athletic with Zamora scoring twice and new signing Carton Cole grabbing the third. That's what West Ham should have been doing, right? That's a nice steady start to the season with players who should be playing for West Ham scoring for West Ham against Charlton. All fine. Do you know who was playing for Charlton that day, by the way, up front? Marcus Bent. Sorry, Darren Bent. And Jimmy Floyd Hasselbeck. Really? How weird is that? He had this weird sort of like end of his career where he went to like Charlton and Swansea.

12:13Well, I think this is very much the era of everyone in the Premier League having a weirdly big name striker. Obviously, Bolton are involved in this season in a few points with West Ham. And, you know, they had Elhaj Jouf. They had Nicholas and Nelko. Which is the object of one of our previous pods. and big Kevin Davis as well. So everyone had firepower. And yeah, weirdly, this is the lowest scoring Premier League season in history. Well, we probably had our best complement of forwards for quite some time. We had Carton Cole, who ended up being a West Ham legend, sort of in spite of himself. Marlon Harewood, our top scorer the season before.

12:46Teddy Sheringham. And sitting there forlornly on the bench, Dean Ashton. Who this was like, he didn't know it at the time, but he was really never going to play football again. He'd injured himself in pre-season. Sean Wright Phillips of all people had fallen on his leg in an England camp and he never played again the national and also Bobby Zamora and Carlos Tevez forgot about Bobby Zamora and then of course Carlos Tevez turns out Luke Friedman writes in he says when they signed Tevez and Mascherano I said to a mate West Ham would challenge for trophies his dad replied they'll mess it up there West Ham how right he was and indeed after that decent opening match West Ham go on to make one of their worst starts to a season And in decades, there's an eight-game losing streak, which equaled a record from 78 seasons before.

13:33What was going on? I mean, there is a very strong argument to say that the arrival of Mascherano and Tevez completely destabilised West Ham and gave this kind of, you know, blew a bit too much air into the squad. And there are a lot of players here, and Pardew may well have been responsible for engendering this, that were a bit too big for their boots, that were being pretty unprofessional off the pitch, and we can go into some of the issues there. But one of the biggest disappointments was Nigel Riococca. So he was kind of earmarked as a future England player, England captain, Man United and Arsenal were circling.

14:07And his form just absolutely fell off a cliff and he sort of started falling out with the West Ham fans. And that story was quite sort of emblematic of what was going on at the time. Right. Eight games in a row to lose, though, is pretty horrific stuff. Included in that, there was the UEFA Cup exit in the first round against Palermo. and perhaps more embarrassingly, a League Cup defeat to League One Chesterfield. Yeah, it was. And in terms of betting in Mascherano and Tevez, Mascherano ultimately failed to displace Hayden Mullins. Right. And it was a big sort of debate among West Ham fans at the time.

14:42It was like, well, Mullins is playing absolutely brilliantly. Is it actually right that Mascherano takes his place? There were question marks about whether there was something in his contract about a number of appearances. Pay to play. Yeah, I'm not sure that was the case. I think genuinely Hayden Mullins was keeping him out. And he picked up an injury, I think, Mascherani. He only played five games for us, lost them all. I think maybe seven in all competitions. Lost every single one of them. You're absolutely right. Three starts in there. Although, then in January, moves to Liverpool and ends up playing in the Champions League final.

15:08At the end of that season, goes on to win five La Liga titles. Did it all right for himself. Yeah, he did it all right for himself. He didn't need to play for Liverpool because he played for three teams in the same season. That was way through. And also, no, I was just going to say that it was part of, I think it was part of his transfer to Liverpool that the process of that actually shed some light on his ownership status, which then led to the decision against West Ham. Sorry. Absolutely. I was going to say, well, one thing that Mascherano did do is he started learning English pretty effectively.

15:41And I think by the time he moved to Liverpool, he could speak a bit. Tevez had absolutely no interest in learning English. And he said since that this was apparently due to beef over the Falklands, which is interesting. He just didn't really, wasn't interested in our culture. In fact, he used to quite regularly go for steak suppers at, do you know, Buenaera on a Broadway market? Yeah, he used to go there when he wasn't, you know, at casinos with Carlton Cole. He also had this interpreter called Kieran, who apparently he got on really, he integrated brilliantly into the West Ham squad. and the problem with Kieran is that when Tevez had been out late at night Kieran would give it away with the kind of shaggy eyes and hangover the next day so you'd always know that Carlos had been out if Kieran was hanging but yeah didn't ever pick up the language just while you were saying that Benji I was just thinking when air is lovely in what's it it's broad Broadway market Broadway market right on the other side of town way over in Battersea if you like an Argentine steak oh yeah I know the place you mean Santa Maria del Sur yeah yeah is that still going Yeah, yeah, very much so.

16:43And what was it? We're talking steaks? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Beefed de chorizo. I haven't been there for a long time, but it's good. Beefed de chorizo? The Argentinian cut? Isn't that what it's called? It might be. Pretty sure. Okay. Washed down with some of your Malbec? Might be. Yeah. Could do. Yeah. Let's go. Anyway, Alan Pardew. Hey, and this brings us on to dinner, actually. Don't go there with Alan Pardew. That would be the moral of the story coming up. I'm not sure if you're familiar with this, but we should talk about Alan Pardew and how the West Ham fans felt about him. You may recall Pardew performing an ill-advised salsa when his Crystal Palace were ahead in an FA Cup final briefly.

17:22He had an unconventional style. And there's one story that stands out for me from his West Ham days told by Stevie Bacon, the club photographer, of a time when he was dining with Pardew and the fitness coach, Tony Strudwick. Yes, I think so. Right, says Stevie, we ordered our meals and Pardew asked us what we were all having. Eddie had gone for the chicken while I'd chosen the steak. Pards turns to Strud's and says, that sounds good. Tell you what, if yours is better than mine when it turns out, I'm having that. When our meals arrived, Pards duly looked at Tony and said, yes, I was right. Yours definitely looks much better than mine.

17:57I'm having that and went to swap the plates over. I said in disbelief, you can't just take somebody else's dinner. He replied, when you're the king, you can do anything. was that indicative of his West Ham approach? I think I think it may be slightly indicative of Alan Pardew's managerial style which is when you're on the up it's you know he's got his chest out he's feeling kind of like the big man very arrogant and you know you never saw that better than when Jason Punchen scored at Wembley and he's doing a salsa on the sideline which I loved by the way you did like that it was brilliant it was fun and it was a man that kind of absolutely swinging is what's it called and having a nice time.

18:37But when things start going badly... As they were here. Yeah, I think that that sort of personality becomes slightly more dissonant when everything's tumbling around him. Right. You mentioned some of the team, some elements of the squad may be getting too big for their boots. Well. It's also an era where there was lots of nonsense going on. Talking of boots. They signed... When things were going really badly, They signed Upson and Lucas Neal, both who went on to be great for the club, just not that season. When they signed Upson, he arrived in London with no boots. And he had to buy new boots from a shop near Upton Park.

19:17And he then did his car fond debut. This is from a piece by Jacob Steinberg. And he only played another 11 minutes that season. So there were lots of unfortunate things happening that year. There were also two members of the squad. I think it was Etherington and Roy Carroll who ended up in counselling for gambling addiction. There were players losing like tens of thousands of pounds to each other on the team coach. So there were lots of kind of mitigating factors to the madness. And I just don't think he could like corral it and make any sense of it and turn things around. Well, he was being kept on in his job, not least by the fact that there was a change going on behind the scenes at the club.

19:54West Ham were up for sale. In November, the new owners duly arrived, Who was it, Benji? Was it an American investment fund, perhaps an oil-rich nation state? Well, it was certainly a recently rich nation state to some extent. It was the Icelandics. It was a guy by the name of Björgolfa Gudmundsson, who was the money man. But it was Eget Magnusson, Ege, as he was affectionately known, who was the face of the takeover. Right. Was he the biscuit magnate? Not in a cup of tea sense, but in a... They had some sort of involvement with biscuits. Yes. But actually, their thing was banking. They were sort of, you know, one of the poster boys of the roaring Icelandic economy.

20:38Right. Which pre... You called him Gary Baldy, really. Oh, very good. Gary Baldy. Do you know what? I think someone did dunk, you know? Maybe you. Maybe you did, wasn't it? Yeah. Right. Anyway, in they come, perhaps sparking a new mood of optimism. Well, it's worth just very briefly remembering how this had come to pass. So like Iceland deregulated its financial sector in 2001. Right. Because they basically wanted to get involved with all the cheap credit that was like flying around the global financial system. That cheap credit was not future proof. Spoiler alert. Should we run you a bath with bubbles?

21:12Yeah, please do. Anyway, their three biggest banks sort of turned into global investment giants overnight. They went instantly mad and borrowed huge amounts of money from all over the place. And once they had this massive pile of cheap credit, they started basically funding anything and everything across M &A, all sorts of onward debt. They were basically playing. Including West Ham. Well, they were playing at being Wall Street, just without any kind of safety net whatsoever. And briefly, it was amazing. There was like a new billionaire every week in Reykjavik. And one of them, Björgolf Gudmundsen, who was the chairman of one of these banks, bought West Ham.

21:49Fast forward to 2008, by the way. This is, well, maybe we can save this for later. No, tell us now. I can't wait to hear how to finish it. These three banks had combined assets of more than 10 times Iceland's entire GDP. And exactly at that moment, the bottom fell out of the global credit system. And I think in like three days, the Icelandic lenders couldn't roll over any of their debt. So it became due. They defaulted on all of it. The Icelandic stock market lost 95 % of its value. The krona plummeted. All three major banks were taken over by the government. and Lambanski's assets in the UK were frozen under the Anti-Terrorism Act, which made their ownership of West Ham untenable because they'd done the same thing, I think, for Al-Qaeda, where any kind of money, basically because there was four or five billion pounds worth of Icelandic assets wrapped up in the British economy and they were worried about it taking flight.

22:41So suddenly, essentially, everything, you know, more or less everything that was owned by Lambanski in the UK was suspended and they had to quickly sell the club. And that's when it kind of went out to tender, Golden Sullivan came along. You sent your email. Yeah, yeah. What could have been? And then we appointed Avron Grant. So it's all causal. Right, that's a story for another time. But in this period here, the real terror that West Ham were facing was the ongoing series of disastrous results. How hard you are than Al-Qaeda. Don't think that's appropriate, Duncan. Less than three weeks after the arrival of the Icelanders, West Ham go down 4-0 at Bolton and Alan Pardew is sacked.

23:24Curiously, he immediately joined West Ham's relegation rivals Charlton, who at the end of the season went down and haven't been back since. But excitingly and crucially for the tale of West Ham season, in his place at Upton Park arrives Alan Kerbishley, a former West Ham player and a man who himself had done wonders in a 15 year tenure at Charlton. Alan was busy playing a charity golf match when we recorded this podcast, but he was very kind and spoke to me beforehand about it. Here's his thoughts on what he found when he first walked in. Well, I came in December, I think, middle of December and obviously in the bottom three I've been looking at their results and looking at their squad and that and when I was approached I had no hesitation going in and I thought, yeah, we'll get a couple of results quickly and it'll ease the pressure off but that didn't quite happen And why was that?

24:21Well, because we weren't playing well enough we wasn't, you know, we didn't my first game was to open the Man U and we beat Man U Second game away to Fulham, got a draw. And then we went 10 games without winning. And I couldn't, you know, couldn't quite understand. We just beat Man United and drew at Fulham and then couldn't win a game. And it was a bit tough. Yeah, a 6-0 defeat to Reading in there as well. Well, that was the catalyst, I think. And that was like New Year's Day or something like that. And, yeah, it was dreadful. And there was a few home truces flying around. What were the home truces that were flying around?

24:58Well, perhaps the fact that you're too good to go down and, you know, we get ourselves out of this and we do that. You know, it was, I think the squad, I'm not being disrespectful here, but they'd won promotion. They'd done very well the next season, et cetera, et cetera. And, you know, just thought it'd be a matter of time before the results would turn around. But obviously it wasn't.

25:29This is the Totally Football Show, part of the Athletic FC podcast network. The Athletic is the only place you can read articles by Daniel Taylor, Amy Lawrence, Phil Hay, James Pearce, Oli Kay and the very best football writers around. Alan Kerbyshire, we'll hear a little bit more from him later on. But how was that 6-0 for you, Benji? Yeah, horrendous. And I think that was probably the moment that most West Ham fans thought, right, that's it. We're down.

26:12Yes, this was probably the kind of zenith of Red Inns. Nadir? Oh, sorry, of Red Inns? Yeah, but still, it was an absolute beating. And there were some proper home truths dished out in the dressing room afterwards. Right. Away truths, technically, but yeah, fine. I mean, there was, I guess, a slight reaction. West Ham drew their next two games. They were about to beat Fulham 3-2 before Christenval got a last-minute equaliser at Upton Park. They then went to St. James' Park 2-0 up and then blew that. James Milner, who's played in every game ever, scored one of the Newcastle girls. And then they lost their next four games in a row, which wasn't very good, including a 4-0 defeat at Wett Charlton, which must have been particularly painful for both managers, or not particularly painful for one Alan, but very good for another Alan, which led to the 4th of March and a home game with Tottenham Hotspur.

27:07Right, well, before that fateful day, on the 2nd of March, something pretty huge happened for West Ham's season off the field. In the course of the takeover of the club, the Icelandic new owners had done due diligence on the club's dealings and had uncovered the truth about the Tevez and Mascherano transfers. Mascherano, who subsequently had moved on to Liverpool, that move had also shed some light on his ownership status. It basically turned out that agent Kierjurabshin's company, Media Sports Investment, and a combination of investors and offshore companies had basically held their rights, owned them, even though they were turning out for West Ham, they were essentially owned by third parties.

27:47At the time, there was no rule against this in the Premier League because it was an entirely new idea. However, the fact that it was they governing the future of these two players and the fact that West Ham hadn't fessed up to this until the new owners had come in, they counted against them. Those were essentially the two rules that West Ham were deemed to have broken, the influence of third parties and the fact that they hadn't been honest in disclosing that. A legal process was begun against West Ham, which eventually ended in a hefty fine, about£5.5 million. but at this point West Ham's relegation rivals were calling for a points deduction and for a club in the Hammers position that would have been absolutely catastrophic.

28:30Two days after this news comes through as you say Duncan West Ham faced Spurs in a game that was billed as a must win for their survival hopes. Yeah so the night of March the 3rd the Saturday night West Ham were rock bottom on 20 points Watford were above them on goal difference, having played a game more. Then it was Charleston on 24. Man City was 17th, so that was safety. They were 10 points ahead of West Ham and City had a game in hand. So, you know, 10 games left. No wonder this game was deemed a must win because it really was. It really was. It featured a very early appearance from subsequent West Ham legend Mark Noble, who was only 17 at the time, but he got stuck in early doors with one tackle, Benji, and then scored the game's first goal.

29:18Yeah, and he actually scored three goals that season. All of them were volleys from Carlos Tevez assists, which is quite a nice way to start your West Ham goal-scoring life. But for Tevez, up to this point, he hadn't scored a goal. It was March the 4th and he hadn't scored a goal. 1 ,142 minutes he'd been playing without scoring a goal. And do you know what? I'd like to correct some kind of fake history here, which is that he was somehow underperforming or a flop. By this point, the West Ham fans already adored him because Carlos Tevez, I think, he's one of the most endearing footballers I've ever watched.

29:55He comes from Forte Apache in Buenos Aires and he was nicknamed the Little Apache growing up and he just fights and he scraps and he's a real trier. And the West Ham fans fell madly in love with him. He just hadn't scored. Right. And of course, in this game... He does score. He does. and the celebration as well has since become pretty iconic. He basically whips his top off. And with Carlos Tevez, there's always a little bit of a wobble under there. And he launches himself into the West Ham fans. Cantonaresque almost. It was amazing. Yeah, he sort of jumps two-footed in the fans and golfing. And it's iconic and it's one of the most famous moments in West Ham's recent history.

30:32Andy Gray says on commentary, I think he might get a booking. I think he might, Andy, yeah. It is Tevez! Goal! For Carlos Tevez! at long last and for West Ham United the luxury of a 2-0 lead West Ham went 2-0 up in that game that must win game but they didn't win it did they? 4-3 it finished to Spurs which left you 10 points from safety with 9 games to go having only taken 2 points from the previous 10 matches so by rights the story should have been done then and there, really. Alan Kerbysh, as you revealed to me yesterday, was strangely confident, though, after that result. Well, that was the game.

31:23Obviously, the rivalry between West Ham and Spurs is well-known. But, yeah, Tevez scored his first goal, which was quite incredible. Mark Noble came into the side roughly about then, as well as a 17-year-old. But it was the first time after the game, which got a bit of a shock, We got a bit of a telling off in the car park for some fans as I left the ground and etc. But it was the first time I drove home and thought, well, look, I was winning three-odd. I've not got too many changes to make if I'm going to make any for the next game. For the first time in a long while, obviously results were dreadful and you think of making changes and you're going to do this and do that.

32:01But that was the first time that I was thinking I'm not going to do too much. Yeah, absolutely. I think everyone felt gutted after that game. but there was absolutely something to hang your hat on in that performance and we'd had that moment for Tevez and it felt like this could be the beginning of something for him. And it was. And it was. And for the rest of that season he was pretty important. How important is a point of contention and was decided by a tribunal at the end of the season? We can come on to that later because there were some other incredible performances in the tail end of that season.

32:35Well, let's talk about Rob Green, for example. his performance against Arsenal. Is that one? Incredible. That was where Bobby Zamora had put us 1-0 up and we went on to be the first team to win away at the Emirates, having been the last team to win away at Highbury. Yes, that's right. We beat them 3-2 the year before when Sol Campbell subbed off and left at half-time. But this game is kind of like a highlights reel of Rob Green. It's Rob Green. It's extraordinary. But it wasn't just Rob Green. If only XG had existed then, we could have had a much better grasp of what happened. We simply didn't know.

33:04Simply didn't know. But he was lorded left, right and centre. But James Collins also was amazing in the sort of tail end of that season. And Mark Noble, who'd come into the side, kept his place and was really, really good as well. Yossi Benioon? Yeah, this was sort of, this probably was him slightly past his peak at West Ham. I think that Liverpool had tried to sign him after the cup final and they sort of came back again the summer afterwards. But yeah, you started getting a little bit of that amazing mercurial Yossi Benioon coming back to the fore. So everything that would have been missing in the first half of the season sort of suddenly turned up in a hurry.

33:38But you also got the Zamora and Tevez partnership as well because the first game after the 4-3 defeat to Spurs, you go and win 2-1 at Blackburn, come from 1-0 down, Tevez equalises, Zamora scores a winner. Curves mentions a bit of luck. I mean, that goal shouldn't have stood. No way. I mean, Tevez essentially cleared the ball off the line for Zamora's winner. Off the Blackburn line. Yeah, off the Blackburn line. You know, it got in the way, but the goal stood. But Duncan, back to you. Yeah, and the next game is a home win against Middlesbrough. Zmora scores after two minutes, Tevez scores just before half-time.

34:08What strikes me, if you watch these Tevez goals, and there's lovely compilation clips, obviously, is just the absolute limbs at Upton Park every time. And it is a different time. I'm sure for you, Benji, that must hit deep. It must have been bewildering for the West Ham fans. You start off with such high hopes, then you're mired in the depths of despair. and now suddenly all of your team is just clicking in a way that you'd given up hope for. Yeah, but it was just so exciting. And it was, again, it's one of those moments where you feel vindicated supporting a team that are mostly crap because when things like this happen, it just feels so much bigger.

34:48And I had it last season with Wickham where they won 10 in a row and some of the wins were ridiculously lucky. But when you're a fan of a team that doesn't do that very often, you realise you're on this run and you realise something's happening. and it is a very special moment. And we were seeing what we'd been hoping for on deadline day in August, whenever it was, which is this world-class player sort of spearheading, asterisk legally, not maybe completely spearheading, our attack and scoring brilliant goals and just being an incredible player that, of course, Man United swiftly came in and bought.

35:21Right. West Ham winning seven of the last nine games. Carlos Tevez scoring six goals in that time. What was the turning point? Does Alan Kerbertshire think? Let's hear it.

35:37You're listening to the Totally Football Show with James Richardson. Now we do four times a week. Keep up to date with us on Insta and enjoy us in glorious Technicolor on YouTube at The Totally Show. Looking back, can you put your finger on why that turnaround happened? Why the results suddenly came so emphatically in your favour? As I said, I mentioned the Blackburn game because that was straight after the Spurs won, which we went up to Blackburn, who were a decent side, and we got a result. We had a bit of luck, as I said, and we got the result. And then we was playing teams like Bolton and Everton who were going for Europe, but we was beating them at home.

36:12And, yeah, I'll tell you what I think the turnaround was. The players' confidence came back. I think we only used 13 players in them last nine games, where obviously before that, when you're getting beat, you're chopping and changing and you know training's a little bit difficult because you're leading people out and there's a lot of unhappy faces but in that running we used 13 players I think and that was the big difference and I was seeing players doing things that they wouldn't even attempt before we started that little run you know before we started that run so it was a testament to the side we took over because they say we we only used 13 players and And, you know, nine of them, well, no, 11 of them was already at the club.

36:57At the end, I think it was only Lucas Neal and Lewis Balmorty who were playing. And Carlos Tevez, who'd come infamously just at the start of the season, suddenly started scoring. What was the reason for that? It was quite simple. We had an interpreter attached to Carlos. And I sat him down one day and I showed him the pitch. And I divided it into three sections. the attacking third, the midfield third and the defensive third and I started giving him marks out of ten for what he was doing and I gave him eight out of ten defensive third, I gave him nine out of ten midfield third and I gave him three out of ten in the attacking third because he was never in the attacking third and I said to him, how are you going to start scoring goals if you never go in the attacking third?

37:45And I paired him with Bobby Zamora and he started scoring. Well, whatever it was that had gone on between the interpreter, Carlitos, and Kerbs, what a difference it made. And I think this is something that Sheffield United particularly felt acutely. Tev is so decisive. Six goals in those final nine games. Seven wins for West Ham in that span. Although, on the 14th of April, they went to Bramall Lane and lost 3-0. And if you look at the Premier League table after that, West Ham were now five points behind Sheffield United, with five games to go. So although, as we're going to discuss, it goes down to the last day and it's probably the most dramatic relegation button on the last day in Premier League history.

38:30It could have been over a lot sooner had they not succumbed. They were brilliant, but it wasn't a perfect run-in. Seven wins out of nine, though. It was title-winning form all of a sudden and, as I say, bewildering for the fans. But to the final day it went and a trip to Old Trafford to face Man United, who they'd beaten in Alan Kerbysh's first game in charge, of course. And as mentioned previously, this was back when it was still proper Man United with Sir Alex in charge and Rooney and Ronaldo. What was the situation on that final day? OK, so Watford down, bottom. Charlton down. You know, they spent a long time saying, has Alan Kerbysh taken us as far as he can?

39:08In some ways, yes. And in other ways, no. So basically the final relegation spot was between Wigan, West Ham, Sheffield United and Fulham. Wigan were on 35 and were the favourites to go down, but they were away at Bramall Lane. West Ham, as we said, were away at Old Trafford. So in some ways, the West Ham game was important, but just as much attention should be paid to what happens between Sheffield United and Wigan, which is one of the, I would say, one of the best Premier League games of all time. Really? Sheffield United only had to draw that game. Yeah, a draw was fine for Sheffield United.

39:43They were at home. Wigan were probably the third worst team in the Premier League that season. But that's not how that game... How nervous were you ahead of the match at Old Trafford, Benji? Oh, excruciatingly. But we had beaten them at Upton Park. And the way that the momentum was flowing, it felt like we probably could. And United have won the league already and did rest a few... I think Ronaldo certainly started the game on the bench. But yeah, I think it would have been pretty hard to predict a 1-0 win, and of course, Carlitos with the winner.

40:32who else but Carlos Tevez set up by Bobby Zamora yeah yeah brilliant and you know after that game somewhat ironically the next time we would see because he goes off to Manchester United would be in a Man United shirt and what he did before that game was you know he created another iconic moment where when he came back when he came back you know he was lining up at Upton Park and we're all singing his name his chant was there's only one Carlos Tevez it was a very very original one but the whole stadium is singing it right and he turns to the crowd and he crosses his arms to make the hammer sign with his hands right and maybe people had done that before but he truly popularised that as a kind of a West Ham thing.

41:15And that remains to this day, you know, a very well-trodden celebration for West Ham players. Fans do it when you're, you know, when I took my son to his first West Ham game over the summer, I made sure he did the crossed hammers in the pictures we took. So he sort of created in a matter of months, three iconic moments for West Ham. First of all, that free kick at Spurs. Then that winner at Old Trafford that kept us up on the last day. And then the crossed hammers to the fans whilst playing for Man United upon his return. Extraordinary. Well, West Ham wouldn't win away at Old Trafford again for another 18 years after that fateful day, but they did it when it counted, that Carlos Tevez goal, ensuring the win that kept West Ham up.

42:01And Benji, after being, what was it, 10 points from safety with nine games to go, West Ham fans call this the greatest escape ever. Yeah, and I think what maybe makes it even greater is we'd signed Nigel Quasi in January, who is famously the relegator. Duncan, does this ring any bells? Hasn't he been relegated with more clubs than any other player? I believe so. My favourite Nigel Kwasi stat is that he's the only player to make fewer than 100 Premier League appearances but play for five different teams, which maybe speaks to the same trend. Well, can you think of an escape act that's more dramatic than this one?

42:38Not really. I mean, I think it's got a bit of everything. I think you do have to respect the fact that West Ham's squad was insanely good and it shouldn't have been in that position anyway. And maybe they just, you know, we didn't understand underlying numbers in these days, but I'm sure at the time West Ham's were quite good and maybe it was just them actually regressing to the norm in the closing stages. But yeah, it was at the time as a neutral, it was incredibly exciting. It's very few times in Premier League history where West Ham United games become like must watch. And for those couple of months, it really was.

43:08And I think we should just mention what happened at Bramall Lane. and Sheffield United were the team that blew it on the last day. And that had consequences because they were obviously the most aggrieved at West Ham. And the tribunal, I think, happened over the summer or maybe it was a year later. Well, the decision didn't come through to 2009. Oh, is that right? But this is the kind of coda to this season to some extent. Before we get to the coda, let's just get a little bit more from Alan Kerbyshire. A few final words on how he felt on that final day of the season and indeed what happened next.

43:43For all the bravery of the combat, the final day comes around and West Ham is still in the bottom three. Martin Tyler saying, an afternoon of purgatory awaits for the visitors as you troop out there at Old Trafford. But when did you start to think that you might actually do it? I'm sitting up, you know, where you sit, I was trying to say you've got a better view behind the dugouts and the ball came to rent on Fernland after about five minutes. He went to knock it to Lucas Neal, backheeled it onto his left foot and swept it out to George McCartney, whoever else was playing left back. And I just thought, in all honesty, if he'd have tried that 10 games ago, he would have fell over or it bounced off him and Rooney would have run through and scored.

44:27That was the difference. I mean, I turned around to Merv and said that. Look at what he's just done. He would never have attempted that. Or if he did, it wouldn't have worked 10 games ago. who's incredible to change. Your broad smile at the final whistle. Can you remember how that felt? Brown gets it back. But West Ham have survived. Great character, great controversy. But great escape, great escape. Magnificent for Alan Kervishly. Well, yeah, I mean, obviously he was hearing the other results and what was going on. And, you know, I think I'd had an interview afterwards saying that hopefully as long as I'm at the club, the club will never be in this position again.

45:07You know, that's how I felt. You know, the club was too big to be in a relegation battle. And the following season, we finished 10th, I think, mid-table, whatever. And yeah, after four or five games, we was in the top four when I left. So, you know, I look back and a lot of the fans call it the great escape, and it probably was. But in my eyes, I was just looking forward after that. in terms of where the club could go. Alan Kerberstein, of course, famously, West Ham have never been in this position again, Benji. Yeah, two years later. After all that, two years later, we go down with Abraham Grant.

45:49Right. Well, HBC says, what happened to Kerbs? He did a good job linked to big clubs at times, but never managed again. Well, let's talk a little bit about what came next for everybody. Sheffield United, of course, go down, as did Charlton with Alan Pardew. Minutes after the final whistle of their game against Wigan at Bramwell Lane writes Neil Warnock in his autobiography Sean Bean burst into my office and blamed me for relegation in a foul-mouthed tirade. That must have been quite a scene. Happier scenes at Old Trafford for West Ham. Carlos Tevez went on to be named Hammer of the Year by the fans and established himself as a cult icon.

46:27He moves to Manchester United and then Manchester City and wins three Premier League titles up there. Curbs, though, after leading West Ham to a 10th place finish the following season, then resigns a few weeks into the 2008-2009 campaign after the sale of certain first-team players had been sanctioned without his say-so. He sues the club for constructive dismissal and wins. But as Alan says, it took me a year to sort out my differences with West Ham, which was far too long. Then the opportunities I was being offered really didn't appeal to me. It was mostly championship stuff. Suddenly, you find that it's been two or three years and you're out of favour.

47:07You're forgotten. A real shame, that, Duncan. Yeah, I mean, if you look at what he did with Charlton, took them all the way up to the Premier League, and then they've not been back since. And then what he did at West Ham in just a couple of seasons, he was clearly a very good manager. I mean, he was being touted for England jobs at the time. He obviously became a bit of an early football meme in the sense that every job that came up for about a decade, it was, you know, we'll give curbs a call. But yeah, it's a shame, really. It is. I hope the goal's gone well for Alan today, but it's a pity we haven't seen more of him on the Premier League benches.

47:42As for the ongoing beef with the Blades, Sean Bean later pitches up at Westminster with a petition and a collection of Sheffield United fans hoping to get the early tribunal's decision not to award a points deduction against West Ham, hoping to get that reversed. Eventually, Sheffield United, having sued West Ham, receive an out-of-court settlement of around£20 million. And it's probably worth mentioning amongst all this that Sheffield United were pretty decent about this because that decision came about when West Ham were in the middle of their Icelandic-inspired financial collapse and they essentially structured the payment so that it wouldn't send the club under.

48:24Is that right? I don't know, but I absolutely don't want to be giving Sheffield United any credit whatsoever in this situation as a West Ham fan. If West Ham had gone down because Sheffield United is still alive and kicking. Still beefy, especially because I took my nephew up there last season, two seasons ago, and we had a last-minute equaliser ruled out by Robert Snodgrass. But anyway, West Ham fans and Sheffield United fans, yeah, beef. Beef to this day. because Jimbo I would argue firstly that it's very difficult to definitively state that a single player has kept a club up right you know when you saw as discussed you know Jimmy Collins and Robert Greene I would counter go and look at the highlights of Tevez's Mark okay but I'd also I'd also say that he also was part of the reason we were so destabilised at the beginning of the season right so either way I just I find that I find that legally uncomfortable Jimbo but I can see why it was slightly annoying.

49:21In recent years, we have seen points deductions handed out, I wouldn't say willy-nilly, but with a lot more abandon and for breaches of rules. And if you were a Sheffield United fan, you would say, okay, you found that they breached the rules, and not just in an arbitrary way, but by bringing in players who've had a material impact on their season. And if we've gone down on the finest of margins on goal difference, that should be reversed. I can see why it pinches. What I would say as well, that at the time, the whole idea of third-party ownership was kind of up in the air. Jurabtian had pioneered this at Corinthians, where I think at one stage only five of the players actually belonged to the clubs.

50:03The rest belonged to this kind of MSI sports vehicle that he'd created. And it caused them a hell of a lot of chaos, and they got relegated and had seven managers in 18 months and whatever. So I think it was a grey area when he came over. And West Ham obviously were like, yep, we'll have some of that. and eventually because of all this it was FIFA I think banned third party ownership full stop some years later so it was clearly legal in some parts of the world I think as we then discovered it wasn't legal in the Premier League but there was precedent there was precedent said Benji hopefully we should point out as well that Sheffield United have been back to the Premier League and absolutely stunk the place that was two of the worst things I've ever seen So, you know.

50:49So there's that. Mitigating circumstances. Anyway, as you were saying before, Duncan, this West Ham season was one of the most entertaining, certainly for neutrals, and exhilarating quite a lot of the time for West Ham fans that we've ever seen. Would you say that's been your most exciting West Ham season ever, Benji? Definitely. You know, the last couple of years when things have been hard work at West Ham, you do find yourself kind of looking back nostalgically. And one nice moment we had recently was when Carlos Tevez came onto the pitch at half-time and we all sang Juan Carlos Tevez all over again and yeah I think a lot of West Ham fans were thinking back to this season and those moments that he produced very very fondly that weren't necessarily determining no absolutely not very unimportant moment that meant nothing but everything but everything isn't that football isn't that football quite there you go alright well that was a little bit of a dive into the extraordinary 2006-2007 West Ham but we can't finished today's Totally Extra Duncan without revealing at least one of the answers to your twin threat.

51:53Yeah, well, the first part was the Who Am I? The former West Ham player. Who played in 1992-93 and also featured in 2006-07. In fact, was essentially the man who sent Sheffield United down because he scored the penalty that gave Wigan the win at Bramall Lane. Right. Having, Sheffield United fans, this is another beef of theirs, having missed the penalty for them when he was still playing for the players at the start of the season. So had he scored for them and not for Wigan, different story. And that is, of course, big bums, David Unsworth. Correct. Very good. So that was part one. Part two was...

52:29Did you get that, listener? They did. Many of them. Part two was the two players who played in 06-07 in the Premier League, but also played last season in the Premier League, 2024-25. Obviously, James Milner is one. But who was the other? Was it goalkeeper? No. Oh. he nearly played against his son last season but not quite oh Ashley Young correct yeah he was playing for Watford this was part of you know part of his ascent and he actually I think he scored at least once against West Ham that year he was so excited where was his son playing well he played for Peterborough didn't he last season and then he wasn't brought off the bench and everyone thought it was a disgrace rather than a sensible managerial decision so yeah it was a disgrace wow what an extraordinary totally extra So thank you so much, Benji, for coming in for that.

53:18Very welcome. Duncan, many thanks to you as well. And all the producers who helped out. Producer Lucy's there right now. Producer Jesse's put this together. There was a chunk of Producer Charlie as well. And above all, listener, there was you. So many thanks for being with us today. We'll have another totally extra next week when we'll be on the Champions League beat. So we'll be pitching up earlier on after the Tuesday matches. but as ever if there's a subject you'd like covered in a roundabout fashion by the show do write in to us for now from all of us here it's goodbye

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