Ep. 120 How To Rebrand Your Life in 2025 With Manifesting Expert Roxie Nafousi

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1:32what is up and welcome back to working hard hardly working happy new year it is january it is 2025 and i hope you're feeling well i hope you're feeling ready to take on 2025 because today we are doing something we have never done we are making history by having a returning guest specifically for this january 2025 first episode of 2025 special back in september i sat down with Roxy Nafusi to talk all things manifesting. I had a long episode plan. I had questions upon questions but did we get through all of them? No. Her seven steps of manifestation was so fascinating that we yapped on about them for about 90 minutes.

2:12Anyway that was one of our most popular episodes of all time. So I thought what if we had a Roxy back to come on to give us the new year pep talk we all need because it's manifesting season and in this episode she answered my questions, she answered your questions. She was actionable, incredibly inspiring. And so I really hope you are ready to sit down and manifest the fuck out of 2025. What I will say as well, disclaimer, this is an episode made for people who either like manifesting and believe in it or don't, because I am a, well, I have always been a manifesting skeptic. I've said it before, I'll say it again, I'm not the type of person who, I don't know, I'm just, I don't, I don't identify with being that woo woo.

3:02And I think that's actually why Roxy's first episode shocked me so much because it's a really complete approach to goal setting and life planning under the name of something which I think has been demonized quite a lot. So I actually have used this seven step method. I really enjoy listening to it. I really enjoy finding out about it I think it really helped me beyond just goal setting which I am really good at um it helps me really identify actually which psychological and mental kind of mindset based things were very much holding me back um which I think because I've always goal set and I've always just written things down and I've always been like yep this is what I'm going to do and this is how I'm going to do them and this is what they look like in daily habits don't get me wrong that is still incredibly important and this comes into the process that we were going to talk about but if you have very kind of limiting mindsets and you don't genuinely believe that you deserve certain things you're never actually going to get there because you're going to constantly self-sabotage so what i really wanted from this episode was like a no-nonsense guide to you rebranding in 2025 i don't care whether your rebrand is like a little rebrand it's just like a little refining of the logo or if your rebrand is entire we're changing the name probably not your name unless you want to you can do that if you really like but it does feel quite drastic changing the name of the business you're changing the your marketing you're changing your logo you're changing literally everything because you've realized you deserve so much more than you have been currently putting into your life or you've been getting out of your life I really really hope you enjoy this episode whether you are watching it or whether you are listening to it the way this episode is designed is that you can listen to it and you can come out of it and you can get ready to start planning your 2025 in its entirety start planning exactly how that relates to the life you want to build yourself whether you get there this year or whether you get there in five years time and in 2025 we are no longer letting self-sabotage and beliefs that we hold subconsciously hold ourselves back from the life we actually want to live and deserve to live because that's a fucking waste of time and we're better than that.

5:13Before we get into the podcast, if you could just go and rate this on whichever podcast app you are listening to this on, it makes a huge difference to the podcast and the types of incredible conversations we're able to have, the types of guests we're able to get on. So no, it's probably something you don't think about. But if you could just go rate it now or follow it, it makes a huge difference. Thank you so much.

5:39Thank you so much for joining me. Oh, thank you for having me again. A New Year's special and actually the first ever time we've had a guest back on the podcast. Oh, I'm so honored. And in such quick succession as well because it was only September. Do you know, I feel like it was really meant to be because we emailed your team. We were like, I'd love to do something again. And you were like, Grace is going. We've got one slot. Take it. literally I was actually that's so funny because I I have not talked online at all about the fact the move to LA um but this will be out by the time actually I will probably be in the process of moving so if you don't already know I am currently moving to LA only for three months I know it's literally the most boring thing an influencer could ever do but here we are um we're gonna go straight into this because this is going to be a 2025 special for anyone who is at the beginning of their 2025 and really just thinking do you know what this is the year I'm gonna smash some goals this is the year I am going to I don't know start a business or commit to going to the gym for anyone coming into 2025 being like this is my year and we are going to talk about exactly how to make it your year so first things first before we get into it for anyone who didn't listen to the last episode better get over there right after this one um can you define manifesting for us because I know there is a lot out there around manifesting and you are the self-proclaimed like PR for manifesting like don't worry guys it's not just like wishing on a star um so let's get clear on what manifesting actually is so manifesting is using the power of your mind to change and create the reality you experience and what manifesting isn't is it's not wishful thinking it's not just about positive thinking it's not magic it's really about becoming so empowered and so full of self-belief that you make things happen it's about aligned action it's about gratitude it's a very full practice that is rooted in science spirituality wisdom and yeah it's an incredible practice that can transform anyone's life and I think the reason that my book manifest has reached so many people is because it's kind of like the perfect book for cynics so if you think i just do not buy this shit i challenge you to read the book and not see how it will change your life yeah and i think that that's one of my favorite things about manifesting because i actually like there is footage of me online having been like i'm not really a manifesting type of person and i think actually the difference is how you see it and how you go about it and I think a lot of the manifesting that you put into play and that you talk about is actually reframing what you think you deserve and building your self-worth so that manifesting isn't just wishful thinking it's actually actionable steps yeah in the right direction yeah absolutely couldn't agree more this feels like a weird question maybe to ask a manifesting expert but what are your views around new year like do you like new year so I actually love it and I think that I don't know why New Year's resolutions are getting such a bad rep people like oh fuck the New Year New Me thing so you know people really kind of are giving New Year's a hard time I feel but I think it's an incredible opportunity because there is no other time of the year where we've all had a break together like you know usually when we take our summer holidays or we take our holidays every Easter or whenever it is you're still getting emails you've still got people on your bag you've still got a lot to get back to whereas after christmas everybody has been off you you have not talked to the retail sector i'm so sorry that's fine you might get a day here all that um but you know there is this kind of real communal sense of a new beginning and that like energy that we're all in together is so uh contagious and electric and motivating and it's a time where you can really think okay I am starting afresh and so many people need that feeling they need to feel like they are leaving behind maybe a challenging year or a challenging time or maybe that they're just so ready and invigorated to start a new year and think about okay at the end of 2025 what do I want to have achieved and who do I want to have become um and so I think it's a I think it's an amazing time and I'm all for it and I think this is the time now to really think about both what you want to leave behind and what you want to take into the new year and I love getting really reflective at this time of year and what is your kind of goal setting or resetting process when it comes to the new year so it comes in two parts I think the first is this reflection so I will kind of lay out loads of questions for myself so first it's thinking about maybe the more challenge the challenges I face so what were the challenges I went through how did I deal with them how could I have dealt with them better um what do I not want to take into the new year and that could be people friendships like there aren't really many but for some people there might you might have some toxic friends you want to leave behind or relationships or people that you're texting that aren't giving you the love you deserve um it might be habits you know there are bad habits that you know you want to leave behind because you know they're not serving you and I guess really that's the overarching question is what is no longer serving me.

11:03And then you want to think about what went well, you know, where did you show up for yourself? Where did you overcome a challenge and feel proud of that? What relationships really made you feel loved and respected? And how can you honor them going into the new year? And so that reflection for me is a really important starting point. And I absolutely love I like will light candles, get my journal out and make it a real experience. and then I go about doing my vision board so for me my vision board I kind of split them into different categories so I have a large piece of card and I have sort of career personal life which is more like personal development so how who I want to become what habits I want to commit to relationships and then sort of like travel hobbies other miscellaneous the only time I'll ever use that word good to say it out loud it felt so good I was like am I gonna say that weird word and I nailed it I actually nailed it in 2024 I know so proud of myself um so then what I do is within each category and the reason I categorize is because I think it's really important for you to look at your life as a full picture you know not just it's very easy to just focus on this is the relationship I want or this is the career I want actually life is a culmination of all of those things so under each category I personally just bullet point my goals and I'm really really specific about them so what you don't want to be doing is you know just writing like career more money or promotion you want to be saying what's the exact job title you like or if you want to change careers you might want to be thinking about not only the job title and the exact figure you want to earn but also what do the relationships with your colleagues feel like how do you feel in the morning when you go to work how are you being challenged do you feel like you're being given responsibility so you want to be really specific about everything that you can and then you can add imagery if you want to to kind of like make it feel fabulous and get in an ad in that kind of inspiration but I think the mistake that people often make with vision boarding is by the way I don't use any imagery I just do bullet points do you yeah I just with my terrible handwriting a vision board of bullets of bullet yeah yeah yeah well do you know what fuck I should have changed my vision board webinar to the bullet board webinar and then you could have trademarked it for fuck's sake next year next year um so I don't use imagery but you can but the thing is is when people make vision boards and I get tagged in a lot of vision boards and I think people make this mistake where what they're actually creating is a mood board it's just a bunch of pretty images yes and yes look it's nice to be inspired by it but it's actually not helping you to focus your goals and really be specific and so for anybody that is making a vision board don't just do pretty pictures you've got to be specific and i think the thing is is why are we actually making vision boards or visualizing our future self or setting really specific goals we're doing it because we're trying to make our subconscious mind work for us and it can only do that with the specifics so you know the way it works just for anyone that wants the science behind it is that when we regularly visualize a goal or we have a specific goal that we're focusing on the subconscious part of our brain which accounts for 95 of our brain's activity will filter out unwanted information and seek out information that is aligned with those goals so we have lots of different cognitive biases that we use that help us to do this but that's why you actually need to be specific no it is it's so true and i find i don't know if anyone else finds this but i i have like an actual shift i can feel within my brain when i get to the point that i realize actually i don't i am now exactly clear on what i want my life to look like i am exactly clear on what I want my job to look like or all of these different things I think before that point it's so easy to also let other people's versions of success infiltrate your version of success being like I want to be successful it's like what does successful mean to you because to me actually at the moment successful means working less and being able to have more freedom and a number of these different things whereas successful to me two years ago was taking as many opportunities as physically possible and being completely slammed but it's with great opportunities all of that it's like this version of success shifts and if you don't have clarity on it in your head how can you make the right decisions like if an opportunity comes up how can you say yes to the right ones and no to the wrong ones if you don't have a very clear view on what you want your life to look like i think it's a really good point because i think and i talk about it in my books but when we're thinking about what we want we have to get rid of the noise and the noise is other people's expectations what society says we should want and what the past us wanted sometimes we let's say we've had a goal for like five years or we've always wanted to be this when we were older or we always wanted to do this and then that changes but it can be quite hard for us to admit we don't want that anymore because we feel like we're losing a part of ourselves but actually we really need to come to this process with a lot of vulnerability and being able to be honest with yourself about what you really want and think will make you feel most fulfilled and content and at peace and uh and fueled with purpose and drive and so that requires vulnerability and then it requires courage because I think a lot of people might when they come to making goals or writing what they want or making a vision board they often will stop themselves really um dreaming as big as they can because they try to be realistic when people say to me oh I'm just going to be realistic I'm like oh my god please don't yeah I hate realistic.

16:56And people say to me, where's the balance? And I think it's a really good question because people say, okay, well, what's the balance between having realistic goals and actually just, well, why can't I just say that I want to manifest being on a yacht? And my answer to that is like, why do you want to be on a yacht? Or why do you want a Lamborghini? Or why do you want to just have a Chanel handbag and that be on your list? Because to me, if somebody's goals are just that or they just want to have two million followers or these kind of like wild dreams, what is the reason for that? Because ask yourself, is the reason for that because you're trying to find validation or status through those things?

17:37Because if you are, then I know I don't think you can manifest that because we manifest what we subconsciously believe we are worthy of receiving. So manifestation is all about self-worth. So we're trying to find firstly self-worth within us. And then when you have that, what you'll see is you don't need a Lamborghini to feel enough. You don't need a Chanel handbag. By the way, I don't know which of your listeners are actually thinking about Lamborghinis. bikinis but but i'm just gonna go with that example because i've started but um you know like like why do you want these things and can you actually think about something that is actually going to bring you true happiness um and that's a much more important journey um to and pursuit to go on that why is going to be what fuels you when motivation drops off because as we kind of said at the beginning of January you're full of this you're full of motivation there's this like new energy you're excited you set your goals and then a few weeks might pass a few months I mean I don't know who's getting to a few months without their motivation dropping but some people might but you know the motivation starts to fall off and if that's all we're relying on we'll give up but if you know your why the why is what's going to drive you through the discomfort through the times where you don't want to get up you don't want to do it you don't want to you know commit to those goals anymore and so I've seen a lot online about 2025 being the year of the rebrand and everyone's saying you know I'm sitting here planning my 2025 rebrand or me up late at night planning my rebrand I have a few mixed feelings about rebrands what are your thoughts on a kind of whole 2025 rebrand look i'm here for it i'm here for anything that motivates somebody to want to be a better version of themselves and sometimes we need terms like i'm going to rebrand myself to make us think about it so if that's what kind of gets you going and gets you motivated and inspired to change then i'm all for it i think that you know we are constantly evolving and we're constantly changing.

19:47And it's really important to figure out what direction you're going in. And for me, when I step three, align my behavior, which we spoke about last year, it's about stepping into the character of your future self. And I think you can really use this idea of rebranding to help you with that. So you're kind of rebranding yourself from the old you to the new you, the you that is your highest self, your most empowered self, your most confident self, the you that has better boundaries, that is more committed to your routine or your healthy habits, that is better at saying no to things that don't serve you.

20:23I think all these things are a brilliant mindset shift that you can, you know, help push you forward. And so what are the key steps you would give to someone to follow if they want a full 2025 rebrand? I would start by asking them to visualize their future self. close your eyes and think about the best you that could exist and think about how does that version of you feel how do they behave what habits do they commit to what boundaries do they set and then I would after doing a little visualization on it I would get out a notepad and pen and write down everything you thought of and then after that after you've written down everything how that person feels and how they behave.

21:08Ask yourself, how can I start bringing that version of me to life today? What can I do from now? And that might be in your routine. It might be in changing, you know, who you spend time with. It might be that you need to detox. You know, for example, I can't remember if I mentioned this last time, but, you know, I always think about, I think, dressing the part of your future self. You know, it's in my, I talk about this actually in my new book but dressing the part is so important okay because how we dress does does change how we feel and how we can show up and I think that we are all multifaceted people who have lots of different versions of ourselves and the way that we dress can help us step into those different characters and I love doing a wardrobe clear out and you can so do this as part of your rebrand go through your wardrobe and look at every item and like think to yourself does the future me wear this and trust me the shit I got rid of was so like it felt so good give it to charity get it on Vinted whatever you want but just even something like that or clearing out your wardrobe declutter your room like even those things really make a difference the market's uncertain revenues tied and hiring on hold that's why results driven companies are using Upwork to keep work moving.

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23:48That's wearfigs.com. code FIGSRX. For people who have continuously set goals at New Year's, so they've done it in 2024, they've done it in 2023, they've done it in 2022, and they've got to the end of the year, and one of those things on that list has been ticked off, and they wish they'd done the others, so it's not necessarily a, do you know what, that wasn't going to serve me anyway. What would you say to them when they're now thinking, is there even point? Should I even be setting any goals for 2025 considering I never actually go about reaching them? I think it's important to kind of take responsibility and ask yourself why didn't I reach those goals like what happened self-reflect you know was it because I just didn't want them anymore was it because I didn't want it enough was it because there was fear that was stopping me from taking risks?

24:46Were my insecurities holding me back? Were my limiting beliefs holding me back? But no, you absolutely should keep setting goals. I mean, I think as humans, we need goals to keep ourselves motivated. We need a reason to wake up in the morning. Otherwise, we just feel stagnant and stuck. And I think that is really, honestly, problematic for our mental health and the moment you have something to work towards and to focus on you do feel better um so yeah do not give up on goals just because you didn't reach them before but do ask yourself why they didn't work out and what about when we get a few months into the year and life starts throwing a few curveballs um and you look back say it's april and you're looking back or someone watching this episode in April you're looking back and you're thinking oh god I've gone a little bit off track I'm not where I thought I would be by April how do you kind of recalibrate to make sure that you're still moving in the right direction I think first it's really important to just come at it with complete non-judgment and acceptance and I think the worst thing people can do is kind of beat themselves up about it because that only lowers your self-worth and feelings of confidence and makes things worse.

26:08I think it's about just being like, okay, it didn't quite work out this time or, you know, I fucked up or yeah, I got distracted. And hey, what was causing that? What were the triggers? What made we go, you know, and I think it's also really important to recognize that our subconscious is sabotaging us so often. And we have to have that awareness. And if you're listening to this in the beginning of the year, watch out for what your subconscious will try to do because our subconscious feels safe in what's familiar and what it knows. And so that's even if, you know, what's familiar isn't good for you, your subconscious doesn't care.

26:44It just wants to feel safe and it wants to feel comfortable. So when you start making change and you enter a new feeling, your subconscious will often try to drag you back to sabotage you. So most of us have been on a diet at some point in our lives where we've tried to get healthy or get fit and change the way that we eat. And what happens is we'll do really well because we're full of motivation and we'll start feeling really good and we'll think, oh my God, I actually feel really good. I'm going to celebrate with a McDonald's or a pack of candy kittens or whatever it is. That is just our subconscious self-sabotaging.

27:17It's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. You're not used to feeling this good. You're not used to feeling this motivated. Let's drag you back to what you know, to that feeling of guilt or shame or regret or those constant feelings. And so it's really important to recognize that that is happening and give yourself a bit of a break, you know, and know that you just need to push through the discomfort until you find a new sense of home, a new sense of being. If you have fallen off the wagon, don't worry. Just think about resetting with simple things. Okay, what can I do tomorrow to just, I love a big reset day.

27:52So if I'm really feeling like, oh my God, everything's gone to shit. I'm feeling so exhausted i'm feeling burnt out i feel like i'm unmotivated i need one full day or even half a day where i can reset i go for a long walk i do some yoga i meditate i journal i do it all you know it's like a crash course on like self-development and then usually that helps me find my foot again and so how do we stop our self-conscious sabotaging us um awareness is like the most important thing and i think that anyway on any journey of growth or evolution or whatever it is we we need to constantly be aware of our patterns of behavior our patterns of thinking um and by increasing our awareness we can constantly start to question ourselves so as you're going to go and you know reach out to that ex that you haven't spoken to in months why am I doing this why am I going back to this kind of person um why am I keeping myself stuck in that pattern and how can I actually sit through the discomfort right now until that feeling subsides and passes and I can actually you know feel better on the other side it's like when I used to drink and do drugs a lot I mean this was a constant thing I mean it was a bit different because there was an addiction at play but it's the same process of you know I might go a few days without drinking or without taking drugs and then my subconscious would be like no no no let's go back there and on times where I was able to succeed and push through that discomfort it was because I would fast forward my mind to the feeling of not so if I was ever tempted to go out and for anyone listening you might let's say your friends have invited you on a Friday night and you're like oh my god I know I'm just gonna get so drunk and I know I'm gonna wake up with a hangover I want you to fast forward your mind to waking up on that Saturday morning and think about how good it's going to feel to wake up feeling fresh to get to the gym to start your saturday feeling good and use that visualization to really like pull you through i really love that and i also think that what you talked about there a little bit is just having having these barriers like these things you put in place to stop yourself sabotaging it might be you know a kind of visualization of what's that saturday morning look like one that really helps me is i have a number of different like social media folders yes social media can be terrible but it can also be really helpful for certain things I have a few different ones that I will make myself watch if I am feeling a certain way so I have different ones like ones on self-worth or confidence ones on like gym motivation ones on like whatever it might be and I sit anytime anything makes me feel a certain type of way like oh yeah no do you know what I should I did say I would go to the gym today I should do that I save it down into that folder or anytime it's like I don't know something of like super confident people or people talking about how you're sabotaging yourself and all of this like I save it down to the self-confidence folder all of this and then anytime I feel in a way where I feel like I'm about to self-sabotage myself like just because it's a comfortable place to be I will specifically go and like give myself my own little for you page by going through those specific folders i love that and i think it is just really understanding like it's an element of mothering yourself like if you were you know if it was your child who was continuously going through these things you would understand what their triggers were and you would get to a point where it's like okay when you're feeling like that we're just gonna go to the park or we're gonna go see some friends or we're gonna do this and actually having those habits in place for yourself almost as if your your own mother I think is it personally helps me anyway I love that and obviously there's self-sabotage there's also I have no doubt some people listening to this episode who are like do you know what I want to rebrand or I want to change my life or I want to work towards this thing I know I can do but I continuously haven't done for years and years because of the company I keep because of you know the type of life I'm generally living like the people who are around me the types of things I do for fun all of this and I do think that's really hard to break out of like we do say that you are a sum total of the five people you spend most most time with and all of that and if you know you obviously when you suffered with addiction that was kind of very you know that's quite specific and there's a lot of different things that play there I think a lot of people even you know are finding it really really hard especially coming out of you know it might be coming out of uni or coming out of school or whatever it might be and just being like do you know what none of my friends live the type of life that I want to live and I love them but I also want to over the next few years I want to reach xyz how do you approach that without chucking all your friends in the bin and you know ending up super lonely or whatever these fears that are going through people's heads when they're thinking do you know what I can't just change all my friends at once yeah how do you actually go about changing that and building the life you love i think you know you definitely don't need to sort of get rid of all of your friends but if your friends are living a very very different lifestyle to what you want to live then you do need to make some changes and i think that it can be just about spending less time with them slowly kind of like easing your way out finding communities and uh you know engaging in activities where you can meet new people who are aligned with you and i do think that you know part of i think growing up like what i've learned is that like not all friendships are forever and not all relationships are forever in fact i think that people come in and out of your life and i think it's actually a beautiful thing that people come into your life for a time they you serve each other in this incredible way you learn something about each other and then life moves forward and other people come in and out and I think that obviously that's not to say we shouldn't nurture our really loyal and long friendships of course we should but there does come a time where you have to understand that the people you surround yourself with will either be ones that can help you move forward or they can be ones that hold you back and I personally think that your true friends will be okay with you going and starting a new direction they're still going to be there and if they're the kind of friends that are like well if you're not drinking with us coming out with us fuck off then maybe they're not the greatest of friends um but i think it is really about deciding what you want um because at the end of the day it's your life and you only get one chance at it yeah no i think that's so true and i also think if you're terrified of you know for example losing your whole friend group overnight and you know just because you want to do x y and z i also think you can you can think about adding before you think about subtracting like when it goes you know if you're i i went through like a real like going out a lot phase and very much kind of it was a lot of my life and i would plan my life like i wouldn't book anything in at weekends because i knew i would be hung over and i knew i would have gone out late and all of this and it took some time to move away from that but I think the way I did it rather than just being like right cutting all of these people off in one go and don't get me wrong some people had to go and that's kind of like the way things happen but as you said the right ones will last and still be around and still have friendships that are based on things that aren't going out and drinking but there's also adding people into your circle that make you you know that are more in the direction you want to be in spending time with them it's not necessarily about never seeing the other people it's like okay well if you go out two three nights a week at the moment could you maybe go out one night a week and spend another night at home and then see that person that does move you in the right direction the next day or whatever it might be like you have a friend that you go to the gym class with all the time or to the gym with or like go on walks with or you know sit at a cafe and do some work on your own businesses like you don't nothing it doesn't need to be drastic and I think a lot of people get basically don't make decisions because they feel it has to be drastic or they make drastic decisions and then they pull themselves back from them because they're like oh my god if I just fucked up my whole life and I do think that actually some of the biggest like quote-unquote rebrands that I've done have been quite gradual but with like a few main things that I changed whether that was adding another person or adding another habit or whatever it might be doesn't need to just be like typing in your group chat being like by the way guys you're all wasting my time and making me hungover every weekend totally i also and i've just asked you a question and literally spent 15 minutes asking answering it myself afterwards um which is actually what i'd love to do even in my spare time one of the best ways we keep ourselves accountable and some of the when you want a big change often you start blurting out a lot of these things that you're trying to do because you subconsciously want other people to keep you accountable like you feel safer being like by the way guys i'm going to do this this isn't this the rest of the time a lot of us keep our goals really close to our chest it's like when you know you're about to break up with someone and you suddenly start telling everyone all the terrible things they've done and it's because you want people to keep you accountable and i do think as well like forcing yourself to even it might be party friends like using this same example forcing yourself to tell your party friends about your exciting goals and like seeing how they react and seeing you know maybe they would be super supportive maybe they want to get out of that as well like maybe they want to do this and actually you know it probably won't be everyone but actually even finding like one person within that group who does want to go to the gym in the morning with you or does want to you know whatever it might be I think can be super helpful and don't be afraid to like lead the change you You know, I when I changed, you know, my lifestyle.

37:51Yeah, there were some friends I didn't see at all. But then for other friends, I actually became the safe haven where when they were hung over, they'd call me because it'd be like, oh, my God. And I could like look after them or give them advice because I wasn't in the same situation. Or, you know, I'm always the friend is like, let's meet for lunch instead or breakfast. Or and you do find one day you'll wake up. And, you know, I've had this recently. I was like oh my god I have so many good friends and so many lovely friends and that's happened so gradually and in such a beautiful way so uh you know don't be afraid to change your friendship slowly but surely and friends come in and out you know you might lose touch with people for some time but then you'll find they'll find their way back to you a bit later on too a hundred percent like a lot of the people who I thought I'd lost at one point in terms of like our lives just didn't align and we were in very different life stages all of this have come back around and others have come and gone all of this like it doesn't need to be this constant like drastic cycle of like you know cutting people off all of that what would you say the biggest lesson you learned in 2024 was that will that when you are going into 2025 you're really thinking will help guide your kind of manifestation and goal setting journey oh my goodness I don't really oh fuck sorry just asking the hard hitters here wow um do you know what I think that I feel like I grew up a lot in 2024 and I the biggest thing that I have changed about myself I would say is that I learned how to respond and not react and I have I've always been a very I'm quite a strong personality very emotional very in touch with my emotions um but also found that I could be quite irritable and quite um like like I don't know like I had such high standards for myself and my work that I could get quite easily um yeah frustrated um if things weren't going right you appear to be atting me as well quite loudly actually um one thing I've definitely learned is how to control that and how and actually what I understood was that irritability was coming from burnout and so I know now that if I'm getting easily irritated I need to take a step back but I have calmed so much and that has been amazing and it served me so well and I think that a real sign of growth is when you don't react the same way you would have before and so I really hope to do more of that next year and just um just realize that things I think I don't know if it's just an age thing you realize that things just are all going to work out fine and things are not that big a deal and just let it go and it doesn't always need to be perfect and that is a very liberating nice place to be yeah no I completely agree with that and having said there that you're you know you've suffered with a little bit of burnout or feeling burnt out that's obviously a horrible place to be and I think that you know one of the things that come with going into a new year is this real excitement and raring to go and going 100 miles per hour and all of this how are you intending to balance wanting to go 100 miles per hour or wanting to reach all of these goals whilst also making sure that you're not like hurtling towards burnout again yeah I think it's just constant check-ins with yourself you know there are times to just like go full throttle and there's times to just put the brakes on and it's just recognizing that you can't have it all one way all the time so you know check in like for me like I say I know if I'm getting irritable that is a sign for me to back the fuck off and just relax and take a beat because it's not good for me if I'm if I'm feeling like that I also know to you know turn off my phone at night I know to have weekends like for example the last few months I was writing my fourth book and I worked every weekend every second every morning every night you know I you I did not start for months but I knew that's what I had to do to get that work done as soon as it was finally handed in weekends were sacred again after 6 p.m was sacred again and so that helps me kind of keep that balance it's just finding your boundaries and being strict with yourself rest is as important as motivation yeah I mean it's also like part of productivity you know rest is productive she says tattooed on herself on her forehead needs to be um but I also think a part of what you said there was you know when you were saying you were really pushing towards this book and you were doing a lot of work for it and all of that I think that what can be a little bit toxic about the online conversation of balance is this assumption that you're always going to have this perfect balance and I actually think what you said there was really profound in terms of the fact that actually at parts of the year you absolutely did not have balance but the crucial thing was not feeling like you'd gone back to step to square one and actually instead just knowing that this was a temporary thing that was you know bound by time and bound by something you needed to do and if in that process you'd be like oh do you know what i've fucked my whole routine and i've gone against everything i say i do and all of this you very easily could have pushed yourself off the piece of track yeah yeah um and actually really it was a temporary thing and you know it was a temporary thing and not thinking about it as going back to square one i think is so so so And also not complaining about it.

43:28Like going in with excitement. For me, it's like everything is about the mindset and the perspective you take on things. And those times where you have to just go for it, try and like, yes, you're going to burn, you're going to be tired, but enjoy it. Like this is like the hard work is part of the enjoyment as well. Like enjoy the fact that you're like working towards something that you really care about, but then know that you're going to give yourself that rest on the other side. and that way you can enjoy both kind of the hustle and the reward.

44:32So I'm going to ask you a few big questions, which have been highly requested off the back of the episode we did before. So we're going in. Okay. First things first. Do you think you can manifest love? Yes. Absolutely. I think it's the hardest thing for most people to manifest because we hold the most wounds around love and relationships. But yes, you absolutely can. So how do you do it? Step one, be clear on your vision. Know exactly what the kind of person that you want, what you want that relationship to feel like and who you want to be in that relationship. Step two is believe you are worthy of it.

45:11So remove fear and doubt. so that's about healing and processing your past and working with therapists changing your language using affirmations meditation whatever it is to help you heal those wounds step three is align your behavior so go on dating apps allow your friends to set you up you are not going to meet someone sitting at home I say that to myself not that I'm single but if I was step four overcome tests from the universe this is about not settling if you are engaging with people that don't treat you right that don't give you respect that aren't going to give you what you want you are taking up energetic space and blocking somebody who is right for you from entering your life so say no to them let them go close the door step five is embrace gratitude don't be thinking i'll be happy when i meet someone be grateful for your life now for being you know in a position of you know empowerment and independence and enjoy that while still knowing what you want i call it the manifesting sweet spot knowing what you want whilst being entirely grateful for all that you already have.

46:10Step six, turn envy into inspiration. So make sure that when you're looking at other couples online, instead of being like, oh, I can't believe there was someone that I'm not. Think, oh my God, what an amazing showcase of love. I can't wait to experience that for myself. And then step seven, trust in the universe. Do not allow yourself to become desperate. Desperation is a low vibe energy that will block you from receiving. Instead, sink into this trust and surrender that what you want is coming your way that is my seven steps to manifesting also by my book that was so good that was like a um it was like a rap battle but on manifesting i really enjoyed that i don't have a response from you in for you in rap but i wish i did oh my god thank you i never considered myself a rapper but here we are amazing manifest manifest part of my rebrand um and what affirmation should we be bringing into 2025 my favorite affirmation is oh god my favorite affirmation is i am enough i've always been enough but i would also bring in i am ready to receive um i'm excited for what's coming and i let go of what no longer serves me i love those and i think they're i don't know i think i say this because you know as i've said before I've been someone who has looked at manifesting and just instantly assumed it's not for me and I think that we're all on different scale different kind of scales of things that you know work for us and things that we like and things that resonate with us and I think that there's so many different ways to see every single affirmation like it doesn't need to be you know you don't need to be the person kind of reciting it to yourself in the mirror you also can be the person reciting it to yourself in the mirror you don't need to be the person who writes sit down you also can be but I think regardless of that it is categorically true that if you do not feel ready to receive the life that you've been working for or that you want to work for all of this you will not get it because opportunities will pop up and you will just say no to them or you will not see them in the way you need to see them or you'll say yes to the wrong ones and actually being really really really clear with what you want and being genuinely ready to take that on is i just don't think you can do it without it absolutely i've got my let's pull an affirmation for the for the viewers let's do it i feel like these are this is your 2025 affirmation it's coming right in okay let's pick one each okay cool what's mine gonna be okay right um i actually just before we pull this when um i was at your um was it at your higher self dinner yeah was there tarot card reading yes yeah um i mine was actually hilarious and i got the piss taken out of me so much because mine was he pulled something else and he goes are you doing a lot a lot of things abroad at the moment and i was like oh yeah you know like i'm i've been working a bit in the u.s all of this because do you have a business yes and he goes your international expansion's gonna go fantastically oh and then i like sent it to tala's ceo being like i've just had my tarot cards read and they've said my international expansion's gonna get amazing and if that doesn't say everything about me and what i would get from tarot card reading about international fucking expansion i was like i am both embarrassed and impressed i am the fact that this is the vibe i'm giving off is like please international expansion international expansion wow he's better than i thought it's like amazing okay ah mine is i am more powerful than my fears and doubts oh i like that one give us some fears and doubts um i think something i still struggle with is basically growing up my mom really pushed the evil eye on us it was like you should never like seem too good or seem too happy because other people will be jealous and then they will hate you and one thing that I have definitely found myself really like afraid of recently is because for the first time in my life I am so confident and happy and I'm really trying to enjoy it and so I'm probably expressing myself differently I'm showing up online differently and I constantly have this fear that I'm about to be like hated and taken down because I'm happy and I find it really like every time I open a DM a part of me is convinced that someone's going to be like you fucking I like it yeah but they're not and even the odd was and actually I know because I really I don't mind I understand that you know one is liked by everyone but it's definitely a twingling fear that I'm still working on and that was probably also layered with the fact that that is like there have been studies done that literally show that the more successful women are and the more confident women are the more they are disliked by the wider population like it's really depressing but it is true yeah and i think what's helped me there has also been like and if so so what does that make my happiness different does that make my work different does that make like if i did open up this dm and it was like you are a piece of shit and also you're ugly like as in like does that change anything genuinely about the way i walk outside today or the way i do my work today all of this like no it yeah it can't really because i gotta get on with my shit but actually also thinking and so what if that is the case like genuinely so what cool like that hasn't changed anything about my reality and i feel like that's quite powerful too because it is really hard as women to both be confident not be hated for it we see like we demand women to be humble online or no matter what they've done we demand to hear their sob story and we demand to hear like what what they got handed and like all of this we demand that from women so it's also you have society against you feeling like happy and confident and not you know feeling fine showing that totally right time for me to air my dirty laundry oh i find joy in the ordinary so that actually for me that says especially as you're someone that's trying to find you said you're trying to find balance right that really is saying find joy in the simple pleasures that is how you will find balance if that's what you're looking for for 2025 that's where it is the the joy is not just in the mass international expansion

52:38it's in the little moments yeah no I think I mean I think you're so right and I think that's one of the like one of the big things that you know as I said like with finding balance and like trying to really question like why I want certain things and why I deem it so necessary to work every single hour of the day like you know like what is pushing me to do that because it's definitely a validation thing it's definitely a self-worth thing like I have that so like productivity and being seen as a hard worker is so intrinsically tried into my identity that it is hard to strip that back without also feeling like I need to live an entirely different life because I've also created a life for myself based on the fact that I clearly believe my productivity is the biggest thing I can possibly ever offer to the universe um and so I do yeah I think that's a it's a good one because in terms of the like joy in the ordinary I think that I've needed to only find joy in like these big huge things that I work towards for months and then finally get to talk about and people say they're really impressive and like all of this is it's just like actually genuinely does that make you happier than being able to wake up in the morning and like go on a little coffee walk with a friend or have a chilled morning for once or saying yes to a lunchtime opportunity which i would never fucking ever ever ever do and i think that that is it's very true and i've no doubt that i'd read all those cards and be like for fuck's sake so much to do but i think that's i think that's right i will keep it thank you so much she'll go in the back of my phone case oh now i have to do something to change my life gosh so tough um okay last one what is the best way to take back control of your life make a decision to that's it it's really about making a choice and recognizing that uh the only person that can change how you feel or how your life ends up is you it's true and i always say there's there's many things in our life we can't control but the things that we can we should that's really that's a really really good point And I think that a lot of the stuff we stress over is stuff that is uncontrollable anyway.

54:57And really learning to control the controllables and knowing that actually, do you know what? I can't control these five things that are going to go wrong today. What I can control is my response, is how I adapt to them, is how I keep my mindset in check, all of this. And I think that becomes really powerful because it's very easy to think, especially, I don't know about you, but like especially as a business owner, it's very easy to think that everything is uncontrollable and therefore every single day will be an absolute shit show and actually just being able to be like cool well at some point you've got to get fine with being you know happy even though or like feeling joy or feeling comfort and feeling control even when things are like flying around absolutely and I also think that is a perfect place to end because when you think about taking back control of your life I think it's really really easy to spend a lot of time consuming content looking at resources like doing a lot of things that aren't actually doing the thing and I feel like there will be a lot of people listening or watching this episode who just go on and click something next and just continue about their day and I think that you saying do you know what all it takes is one decision is a very good call to action in terms of actually just being like okay so let's do it like let's Fully decide what you want your life to look like.

56:17What are the categories again? Finance, relationships, friendships, work. All of it. All of that. And actually getting very, very, very clear on that because I think it is so easy to, even in the new year, to drift through consuming all of this content and not actually taking control and taking action over your own life. Absolutely. So it's time to go and start writing some things down. Well, thank you so, so much for joining. me this has been amazing oh i think you so much people will find it really really helpful and i can't wait to see what everyone does in 2025 thank you

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