How To Avoid The Sunday Scaries And Build The Ultimate Reset Routine

0:11What is up? I'm Grace Beverley and welcome back to Working Harder. the podcast shape guidebook on how to improve your own life and achieve what you actually dreamed of doing because life's too short for boring podcasts and bad advice.

0:25What is up and welcome back to Working Hard. Today it's another Thursday bonus episode and I wanted to chat about the art of a Sunday reset and I wanted to talk about this because I feel like I see so many resets like Sunday resets on TikTok in particular. It's very much like this routine and it's like cleaning the whole house and all of that and that's just that's not really what I want for my Sunday if I'm perfectly honest but I also feel like you can get much more out of your week if you do do your Sunday right both in terms of relaxation and in terms of organisation so I wanted to talk about that a little bit but I think one thing as well is that I've been getting quite a few questions through to the Instagram for working hard recently from listeners who feel like they want to start getting their shit together a bit more and my answer to that a lot of the time is how you spend your Sunday.

1:12Like I think first of all if you're too burnt out how you spend your Sunday is important. I think if you are not organized enough how you spend your Sunday is important. I think if you are not on top of your budgeting or you find yourself getting to the end of every week and you've like exerted yourself far too much or you thought you were going to get loads done that you didn't end up getting done. The right Sunday reset is the answer. So I really wanted to talk about that because I don't think it's all about cleaning. Like I don't think it's all about getting your surfaces looking nice but I do think that's part of it and I think that a lot of these things the reality behind them is like having the right approach to you like dopamine on a Sunday is incredibly important for the rest of the week and that is not going to be me saying like don't scroll on a Sunday because I don't believe in that at all actually if you're going to scroll anytime maybe just scroll on a Sunday but I think that by doing certain things that ruin your week because you end up having so much on your plate other than just trying to make a living, it makes life very hard.

2:06So on top of that, I feel like if you're someone who struggles to stick to routines, it is so much easier to stick to a Sunday routine than to stick to a Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday morning routine, for example, or a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday evening routine. Like there's always so much like washing to do and food shops to do and all of that. Like work is already hard enough. I feel like as much as possible, you want to get that on weekends, but also not ruining your weekends in terms of the fact that you spend your whole weekend doing chores. So it's a fine balance but I feel like I have a good set of questions that I ask myself that form this exact Sunday reset and I'm going to talk you through them.

2:44And the whole idea is that you're not getting the Sunday scaries, you're not waking up exhausted before work, you're not spending a whole Sunday being productive, you're not spending a whole Sunday cleaning but you're also not shooting yourself in the foot every single week where you haven't done anything that you needed to do and in the weekdays you end up working all the time and doing like all your home stuff all the time. So this is my cure to the Sunday scaries. I think the first thing that's important to say is that I do not believe that a Sunday reset should take up all of your Sunday. In fact, I think that a Sunday reset should take up two hours a max of your Sunday.

3:19I'm going to say one hour more likely, one and a half at a push. Sundays are sacred to me, not on a religious front I'm not personally religious but I do not believe in spending the whole day worried about work the next day or frustrated about work the fact that you have work the next day ruining that day when you could have lived it in the moment and I also don't want to spend loads of time working on a Sunday ever just like ever ever ever so there is this very short list of things that I do every week that I swear by to feel better the next week and as I've said this only takes me an hour one hour and a half tops and I personally prefer doing it early on a Sunday afternoon because I do not believe in waking up and working on a Sunday.

4:05I do not believe in setting alarm on a Sunday unless it's for something fun. I do not believe in doing this at 7pm on a Sunday because that is for a movie time. So I think that is really important and what I would highly highly recommend to not let this bleed throughout your whole Sunday. You want to set a timer or an alarm. like you want this to be something that first of all it takes far less time than you think it does so a lot of the things that you're putting off are going to take a fraction of the time that you actually think they're going to do but also because you just need to not let it bleed into the rest of your Sunday so I am most likely to do this at around 12 midday on a Sunday to 1 30 laters I might do it while my husband is uh watching a football game I might do it after I've already been for a cute brunch and Pilates with the girlies.

4:53It's not the main event. In fact, it is a tiny little lunch break equivalent time frame that's going to improve the rest of my week. So these are the questions I answer. And the way this is split out is questions that I specifically answer and then actions that I have to do. So a lot of the actions come out of the questions, but some of them are just chore based things. So number one is, is my schedule realistic this week? I'll look at my Google calendar and I'll just look at it and I'll look at the work days because I'm self-employed kind of, although I also work at a company, kind of confusing, but also in the evenings.

5:31Like, is this realistic? Especially knowing if I have a big work thing coming up or if I'm on my period and I know I'm going to be more exhausted than usual or whatever it might be. looking at my week is it realistic and that is when I will start cancelling things like if I look at my week and I'm out three evenings in a row I'm probably going to cancel one of them I'll be perfectly honest and I probably shouldn't have put them in in the first place or if I said I would go to a certain networking event and I'm like do you know what that is not the priority this week I'm not going to be doing that this week whatever it might be I will look at and I will go through and basically start deleting things I would advise that you get to a point that you don't actually need to go through deleting things because you know your rules for when you're even working out your calendar in the first place.

6:15But I would always review ahead of time. And I think that sometimes you get more Sunday scaries based on the hypothetical of work and like this week's going to be so bad. And you might find that when you start, I would say that if you find you're the type of person who when they start looking at work, you want to do all your work, you just need to curb that. Like you just need to be like, that is not for now, that is a problem for tomorrow. But I do think that really understanding what you have on this week is going to make it better and is going to make you a much more organized person in work and you are able to like emotionally regulate around your week.

6:44Then number two is workouts. So when am I working out and is it blocked in my diary? The answer to both of those should be yes, no, incorrect. When am I working out? It should be clear. Is it blocked in my diary? Should be yes. So the way I literally block workouts in my diary is I will put the workout in and I will put the travel to and from the workout in my diary. So there is no complication or confusion around when I'm getting to that workout, if I'm going to have time to shower after and get to work or get to dinner or whatever it might be. So at the moment, for example, I know I'm working out like three to four times a week.

7:15I should be able to look at my schedule and I should know when I'm working out. I should know what workouts I'm doing because I follow a plan. So that's pretty easy. And I should know that I have time to do that. So that's all blocked in my diary. Then my next question, and I would also say if you're someone who finds it hard to stick to working out and you find it doesn't become a priority and all of this just get it in your diary just get it in your diary like you would every other thing you are negotiating with yourself too much you are giving yourself too much opportunity to be like oh I guess not today no we're not doing that anymore then number three is where do I need to protect my time this week I'm very good at intensity and I always want to go all in on things so for me this is more about forcing myself to be realistic about my energy levels and what's actually going to work for me this week rather than going headfirst into a schedule that's not even realistic.

8:00So it's related to the first one, like is my schedule realistic this week? But it's really about like I need to make sure that I don't say yes to go into the pub after work this week or I need to make sure that I do say yes to go to the pub after the work this week or whatever it might be. It's just about understanding what type of week I'm going to have and where my headspace needs to be, where my mindset needs to be so I can go from there. Then, very important question, when am I having fun this week? I feel like I don't do many fun things in weeknights and for me fun is not necessarily like shaking my ass on a table at a club.

8:30It could be sometimes but really when I'm having fun this week is like my weekly girls night. I have a weekly standing girls night that I've talked about so many times where we go ugly and we sit and just chat and sometimes get takeouts, sometimes someone cooks. It's just really cute, really wholesome. I had it last night. I always feel so whole afterwards. I just think it's so nice and we see each other enough that we can actually hash out things that we're going through or whatever it might be and truly get that support on it. To me that's fun. Games night is also fun. Going for brunch with girls is fun.

9:02Having a nice walk with friends and going for a roast is fun. Just making sure I have enough fun for that week. That's also when I'll shamelessly send out a load of messages being like, hey what are you doing this week to some of my favourite people so that they can see me too. Then are my finances sorted for the week so have I got enough money in my current account for example are my bills covered in the account they come out of have I made my investment for the week if you do a weekly investment or for the month if you do a monthly investment and it's that time of the month but really just making sure like I have visibility over that then my last question is related to my first action and this is just making sure I know my food for the week so if there is a shop that I need to be doing writing out the shopping list if there is meal prep I need to be doing deciding which recipes I'm actually doing I currently use a meal prep company just I've been finding that really easy when things have been chaos but this is where I do food shop and meal prep otherwise so that will be my last one is just working out what I'm eating when in the week and working out when I'm going to get that food and when I'm going to cook it too which might well be in the action section that first section which is all the questions shouldn't take you more than half an hour it really shouldn't it could take you up to an hour, it really shouldn't.

10:14And you've got to keep going. You've got to keep that timer in front of you. You're on D &D. You're not looking at your phone. Your time is in front of you. You're literally just doing this audit of your week. It can be over so quickly. Like this could literally be done in 10 minutes if you put mine to it. Then things to do is the next section. These are a few things you'll have to amend them for yourself because we all have different chores and things to do. But there's obviously the food one. So if I'm going to go do a food shop, then I will have got my list. And that's probably the last thing I'll do.

10:41So you don't want to leave the house in the middle of a Sunday reset but obviously I've got clear on the shopping list so that might be one of my actions. Anything that needs to be washed just put a wash on. Also sometimes I would recommend putting a wash on to start this process because it might be done by the time it finishes and that is going to give you so much dopamine because you're going to get something done and loads of other things done as well. Fold anything that needs folding, if you need an everything shower, if you need to style your hair, like I fucking love having a shower, fucking hate styling my hair personally because that takes about an hour and the shower is actually a nice thing to do but that's when I'll work out a list of things that I actually need to do so it might be that you need to clean all your counters or dust things or mop the floor or hoover or as I said put a wash on fold something hang things up to dry whatever it might be speed round like blast some music set a timer for 30 minutes or 45 minutes do not go beyond that timer and do not go on your phone during this time you will feel so good by the time you finish this and do like you could take five hours doing this if you wanted to but I assume you don't want to so don't do it like just set a timer and don't let yourself do it because it really doesn't need to take that long and I think a lot of the Sunday resets I see like the reason you feel so good watching them is because you're like oh my god the dopamine released from just like cleaning all your surfaces and sometimes I'll even do like I'll clean out my jewelry drawer or I'll clean my makeup brushes or I'll clean out one drawer or something.

12:04I try and not do that classic ADHD thing, which I do all the time, which is try and like overhaul my whole life on a Sunday. Because sometimes I'll be like, oh, I'll do a whole cupboard clear out. No, it's never that. It's I will do this one drawer or I will do this vanity or whatever it might be. But that like really, I try and do one of those things on a Sunday because personally, and I know I don't need permission to relax, but personally, I kind of do. Like in order to enjoy watching a movie on a Sunday afternoon or evening or spending a load of time brainwreck scrolling, I need to feel like I earned that a little bit.

12:34So if I've gone on a walk, I don't need to have worked out, but like if I've gone on a walk and if I've had some nice breakfast, if I've done this or I've cleaned out a drawer or whatever it might be, I will very much have earned that. And that to me is more relaxing. It doesn't need to be for you. You don't really need to earn your rest, but I personally, that's the only way I work. The last part of my Sunday reset is then when I do something that has absolutely nothing to do with productivity or planning at all. So this is all around switching off completely and I would really recommend knowing what does this for you because you're going to get into that Sunday reset and especially if you are a little neuro spicy you are going to get into that and you are going to want to overhaul your whole life until you hit a wall two hours later or three hours later and you're like oh my god I've just wasted my whole Sunday.

13:18So you're going to do something like you're gonna put your phone do not disturb and put it in another room or watch a whole episode of something that's like particularly gripping and you have to pay attention to like with subtitles or whatever like get yourself in to the relaxation slash not planning zone like maybe a true crime documentary or a part of a series you're watching or have a bath and read your book escape out of this planning phase because you'll get obsessed with the dopamine that you're getting from this and that's great but you're done now. You do not need to spend more than an hour or an hour and a half on a Sunday absolute max making sure you've done all these things but by doing all these things you will feel so much better for the rest of the week.

13:57I feel like we often don't get it right when we're thinking about the fact that Sunday's supposed to recharge you because I think a lot of the time they end up being a mix of kind of chores and panic or relaxing too much at the expense of, I obviously don't believe there's such thing as relaxing too much, but actually if you're relaxing all day on a Sunday and you've got so much to do for the next week and you're leaving all of your washing, all of your folding, all of your cleaning, all of your admin, like absolutely everything till your work days, that's when you're probably feeling so exhausted in the week.

14:26But also I think it's really easy to spend Sundays doing too much and I just don't believe in that. Like I believe in Sundays for relaxation. I don't even book plans on Sundays anymore, like this Sunday is the first Sunday in a while that I have plans and that is just grabbing brunch and going on a walk in Richmond Park and I'm very excited for that but that is literally the maximum I would allow myself to do on a Sunday. Also one thing I actually love in this slot which you could put right after doing these questions and doing this reset is going to the cinema. Like I love a Sunday afternoon cinema.

15:00It recharges me. I'm completely concentrated on the film. We've been going every single weekend because we got an unlimited membership which is actually so cheap. We got it for£20 on Odeon. this is not an ad at all I'm a paying customer but like that's insane 20 pounds we've been going every single weekend just to watch whatever's on sometimes they're like things I never would have seen and you still have such a good time like cinema is great and I completely disconnect and I get a little treat and then I come back and I'm like oh that was my Sunday like I was fully concentrated on that new world I was in for a few hours so that's nice and I feel like once you've done this you've done enough to feel prepared you do not have to have Sunday scaries You can enjoy your evening knowing next week is handled.

15:37Also, if anything pops up in that evening where you're like, oh, I want to deal with this, I want to deal with this, I want to deal with this, just dump it in your notes for the next morning. Do not get back on that planning because it's addictive. And well, for some of us it is. And you could end up taking your whole Sunday headspace with that, but you're not going to do that. You're going to write it down. You're going to deal with it the next day because you've already done your Sunday reset. So that is my Sunday reset routine. I feel like it's not about having like a Pinterest perfect Sunday.

16:04I think that it's not about doing the kind of TikTok Sunday reset that works for you. You can take or leave whatever on that list actually is helpful for you. But I feel like it's the routine that makes me feel it's the perfect balance between recharging, resting, and kind of brain rotting, and being productive in a way that I need to be productive, like preparing for the week ahead. It's a perfect balance of those things. It's not too much of any of those things, if that makes sense. And it allows me to fully relax on a Sunday without doing that, like cutting off my nose and split in my face.

16:34I think that's a saying. Some weeks I do all of it, other weeks I just manage the planning bit. I'll call it a win but I do feel like every time you do it, Monday feels a lot lighter. You wake up feeling like you're one step ahead instead of already playing catch up which is personally how I love to start every week. It feels like you are looking after your future self which is what I always try and do but I know it isn't always that easy and I feel like you just like don't believe that you have to have your life perfectly organised. You just need to feel like you've got yourself covered and you've done an audit on certain things that come up again and again for yourself so that you're not going into a week like on the back foot but give it a try let me know if you give it a go and please report back also please let me know if there are questions that you would add that I could benefit from I would love to see this as a full scientific experiment of how we can feel good on a Monday and how we can banish the Sunday scaries because we don't deserve that we deserve a nice Sunday and the perfect amount of rest recharge and actually being a tiny teeny bit productive within time bounds so that you never need to think about that again and you can actually relax so I hope you enjoyed that as I said please share your tips with me because I would like them and either way I will see you next time