Listener Questions Pt 1 - BOD020

19:28Pete:Well, I think it's most important is to be open, have good conversations. Yeah. Right? There's no right way to do this, I don't think. It's funny. I mean, your mom and I, from the day we got married and moved in together, firstly, we didn't move in together before we got married. Christian upbringing. You know that. Was it 1923? And also, we had everything joint from day one. And you know I've not suggested that you do that, obviously. No. I would never suggest that now. Certainly not pre-marriage anyway. No, and even so, I think you should retain some financial independence from one another, but you should be on the same page and heading in the right direction.

20:08Pete:Yeah. So it's early days, Jess, so don't overthink it, right? We're not probably talking about yet, you know, planning kids, buying a house together. You may be. Those are big things. You know, you might just be renting a place together. Yeah. In which case, chill out, enjoy it, you know, make sure all your bills are covered. I think it's important to take into account wages I was just going to say that I'm thinking of your sister sorry I'm also thinking about me but I'll continue yes okay so where there is a disparity of income yes it doesn't necessarily make sense to me that there's an equal contribution towards everything I think if it's bills in the house yeah then fair enough but I think if you are say going on holiday together yes there may be some well actually if you earn twice what I earn maybe we can split it 60-40 something like that 17-30 and I think you just need to have intelligent grown up conversations about it I would probably encourage you to have a joint account for the key bills yeah food water in due course rent yeah so water yes it's like yeah food and water yes you do need water oh you I had a weird mental glitch then so you buy water it's like well yes you do actually it's the thing you shower in every morning that's a real brain glitch yeah that was yeah water heating light all that sort of stuff electric internet all that sort of stuff and if you decide that you're going to kind of pull resources for stuff you do together like if you go out for a meal you know we're gonna go out for a meal twice a month yep so you have a little fund for it have a fund and both contribute to that yes and then have your own sort of fun money yeah exactly and then stuff that you're working towards together you can contribute together and you can do that in monzo pots or whatever i also think with fun money you should have a threshold that you consider this is if i spend this much or more this is something i need to run by my partner yes it's not a permission thing it's a it's a hey it's a courtesy like hey i'm not gonna spend 50 quid 500 quid whatever it is without saying hey kate i really like this i'm really interested in this yeah could we you know because it's it's not a permission thing you're right because it is your money but it's courtesy to the person that you're living with and sharing you know yeah you don't want to be in a situation where that purchase means they have to pull your weight definitely and you know i think there needs to be accountability i don't think it's a case of sort of checking up on each other, but if we're going to do this together, we're both committed.

22:50Pete:And I think it's important to be open. What you don't want is stuff being hidden. No, because as soon as it starts, I mean, I think it's weird. I would consider that almost like a form of cheating, hiding expenses and things. It's a form of financial abuse, I think. Yeah, you've got to be really wary of that. That's not healthy. So I think for Jess's question, open and honest communication. Be conscious of any wage disparity. Yeah, talk about it and be adult and come up with any agreements on how that is worked out. Yeah, and don't have maybe necessarily everything joint. Keep something separate.

23:28Pete:Definitely don't have everything joint. Have joint stuff joint. Yeah. And keep your own money separately. Yeah. I had a friend whose daughter was married, isn't now, and they kept their finances largely separate except for the stuff for the house. It wasn't married, right? They own a house and all that sort of stuff. And he bought a house on a 900 quid a month payment. A car, I'm sorry. I was going to say, what? He bought a car on a 900 quid a month payment and just sort of came home and said, I bought a car. And she said, how much is it? He's going to be 900 quid a month. It's like, well, you know, yes, it's your money, but, you know, we could save to buy a bigger house with that.

24:09Pete:we could go on a lovely holiday you know all that sort of stuff it was basically it broke their marriage really interesting you know who it is but I'm not going to say I'll tell you offline alright it's yeah so yeah it's interesting isn't it that those those things just open and honest communication really important and after every conversation hug each other and tell each other you love each other definitely aww nice just remember that you're on the same team very much so I don't you know it's important to be positive but honestly but practical yeah money has the power to really damage relationships well Ben and I have had a lot of serious conversations about this because the fact that I'm in the position to buy a house and he isn't could have caused rifts jealousy whatever Ben's a stand up guy so it hasn't but we've had lots of conversations about I will never use it's my house in an argument or I will never you know really important it's not that ever going to be like that and then we've also talked about how bills are split and how it will be me paying the mortgage and only me because it needs to be mine and stuff like that.

25:13And if you are just open and honest from the get-go, you'll be all right.

25:18Pete:Definitely. Good luck with it, Jess. I hope you have a wonderful house with your partner. Thank you for your question and the kind words. Really appreciate it. Question three is from Cam and we've actually had a couple chats with you. Yes, well, I tried to ring Cam. We've had some email back and forth. Yeah, and he's been supportive from day one. Thank you, Cam. Thank you, Cam. Hi, Kate and Pete. I hope you are well. I have come across For Meaningful Money And I have also sent a question on there But I know there's a backlog It's like six months backlog Yeah it is The reason I came across Is whilst I feel I have my finances in check I still don't know everything None of us do No that's true I'm 27 I quit my 9 to 5 18 months ago Due to a toxic work environment That was affecting my mental health I started a dog walking business That I have now moved Into a dog training business Cool The massive change for me Was living off the emergency fund Whilst building the business And like Kate Not wanting to spend it Yep, that is what it's for.

26:07I am now in a position where I am making money to pay my bills and have replenished my emergency fund and have a stable growing business. Brilliant. My question after this essay, I do apologize, don't at all, is that I would also like to start investing into a stocks and shares ISA and I believe this is the missing piece. I have savings, emergency fund, sinking funds, business savings, etc. but I don't invest to build wealth. The main reason being is I feel I know what to do but I am genuinely worried about setting up due to making a mistake the fear of it just puts me off I feel like this is a common thing and others may feel the same so I thought I'd ask the iconic dad and daughter duo for support I understand you can't give specific advice many thanks Cam I think he's definitely right that this is not an uncommon thought

26:53Pete:oh no totally but I mean what a great result that is he's got out of a toxic work environment he's found something he obviously loves to do and he's building it and has got his finances fully back on track Yeah, amazing. Replenished Emergency Fund and the Stable Growing Business. Love that. Emergency Funds, savings, sinking funds, business savings. Love it. But I don't invest to build wealth. Just to pause, I don't think we've ever said sinking funds. Oh, no, we have said sinking funds, but just to confirm what it is. Sinking funds is saving for short-term stuff. So if you want to save… Birthdays, Christmas.

27:24Pete:You want to say, right, I'm going to set my Christmas budget for 600 quid. You save 50 quid a month for 12 months. Yeah, okay. So he… Where to start. The issue is where to start, isn't it? it's about getting going. Watch our investment series. Well, yes, which hopefully has helped because it's obviously gone out by the time we're recording this. Yeah. So I think there's only two investment wrappers that count, pension and ISA. So Cam's talking about ISA here. Specifically stocks and shares, yeah. Yes. And you know that I generally say, look, if you're an employee working for somebody else, just join the pension.

28:03Yeah.

28:04Pete:Right? It's automatic. You'll get added to it automatically anyway. Stay in it and do that. That's your kind of baseline before you even get paid for the future. Now, Cam is self-employed. Yes, so he does need to be putting some aside. He does, really. And he doesn't say whether it's a limited company or whether he's self-employed. It doesn't really matter. I think he said to me previously in a DM, self-employed. But I could be wrong. You know, usually limited companies, when you get to sort of 50, 60 grand, it's probably worth setting up a limited company per year of income, that is. Yeah. So I think, Cam, I would say, look, don't discount a pension.

28:41Yeah, that's a good thought. Start at 5 % of your income and start and keep it like that for now, right?

28:47Pete:Just while you really cement the business and really, you know, fully get it embedded and properly off the ground. And that would be with a SIP, wouldn't it? Yeah, pension on a platform, probably. Yeah, so pension, 5 % of your income, or like 50 quid a month or 100 quid a month. Yeah. All right. I like percentages because your income rise, then so does your amount going in. And if your income lowers. It can drop as well. So I would start with the pension, and then anything else you're able to save after that, I put into an ISA. Yeah. Because when you're young and you're building wealth, any money you put into a pension is going to be, it's 27, so it's going to be at least 30 years, before he can access it.

29:33And so it needs to build up ISA here.

29:37Pete:And I'm thinking we put up a reel recently. Yeah, it got a bit of backlash. Got a bit of blowback. I understand, but it was because it was slightly out of context. Yeah, which is just, that's just something I need to be aware of. Because I was saying this, I'm like, you know, focus on ISAs in the early years. I think if you watch the video, it very clearly said, put pensions in, put your minimum in your pension and focus on ISAs as a young person. Like there's nothing wrong with it. No, no, a load of grief. If you're like, this is crap advice and you need to pay into a pension. I forgot to say about context, right?

30:07Watch the freaking video.

30:07Pete:The point is, you know, you need to make sure that a good chunk of your money is accessible. Yes. And pensions are just not going to be. So building wealth for the future, you're going to need to build some accessible wealth. So I think fairly minimum into a pension, 5%, something like that. Anything else you can save once your emergency fund's in place needs to be in stocks and shares ISA. So that's Rapper chosen. Thereafter, you're into a fund, remember? platform, wrappers and funds right so choose a platform that works you are an HL, Hargreaves Lansdowne client really easy to use great app, all that sort of stuff not the cheapest but fun let's trade off for a really easy app pension and ice are the next level down those are your wrappers, your accounts and then you need to think about the fund inside it now here's where we really can't give specifics but I just I think the way to start particularly if you've never invested before, is what I call a multi-asset fund.

31:06Pete:And it's a kind of off-the-shelf, done-for-you portfolio. And if you're worried about starting like Cam is, understandably, it's a whole world that we wouldn't know about otherwise. No. That is, knowing that it's like that kind of cookie cutter, ready to go. Yeah, done-for-you, very broadly diversified. The money is spread around, so it reduces risk, right? Yes. And so there are all kinds of options. Here are some cam for you to look at. These are not recommendations, okay? Vanguard Life Strategy Range, HSBC Global Strategy, LNG Multi Index, Fidelity Multi Asset Allocator. These are just different companies offering the same thing, off-the-shelf portfolio funds.

31:52Pete:Have a look at them, all right? Yeah, they're examples, not recommendations. No recommendations. We can't do that, right? But, I mean, you know what you invested in, but we shouldn't say it. I'm pretty sure we've mentioned it on previous podcasts. Oh, have we? Yeah. Yeah, well, I mean, because it's just kind of, it's done. You don't have to think about it. There's no skill involved or needed by you, the investor. You just buy it. And the money goes in every single month. I do nothing. No, right. And the money just goes in every month and it grows. Especially when you set it up as a direct debit.

32:20I haven't looked at that in six months to see how much it's grown.

32:23Pete:yeah but i just want to encourage you cam because it's it looks like you're doing everything right and you've you know the fact that you're thinking about it is half the battle massively start low start slow use it as a learning experience you've got this go for it i feel very proud do you i'm like there are babies and they're going off into the world they're older than me but they're still no it's good i love the fact that we get questions this is so important if you can get this stuff right man alive it's out for life secure question four this is from freddie hi kate and pete thanks so much for your podcast it's so refreshing to hear the basic step by step i am recommending it to friends thank you thank you freddie then asks about an episode about lysis which we did so yes we can just jump past that okay so my question is about timing the leap from renting and saving in a lifetime isa to paying a mortgage with that money instead should i get a mortgage as soon as I can afford the minimum deposit?

33:19Or am I better off saving for a bit longer to put down a bigger deposit and have a smaller mortgage? I'm sure it will depend on circumstances, but I'll be keen to hear any of the rules of thumb. And I'm sure Pete has some pearls of wisdom.

33:33Pete:Unlikely. Huge thanks and keep up the great work, Freddie. Thank you, Freddie. It's a really good question. Yeah, it is. Should I get a mortgage as soon as I can afford the minimum deposit? Did you clench? I clenched a little bit. You know I don't like that word should, right? Well, they might not know that because that's a meaningful money thing. Is it? We talk about that. Have we not mentioned it here? Well, when have they ever asked anything? No, I feel like that might have come up, but it is hard. The lines do blur. So I don't like the word should because there are very few things in life and in personal finance that are absolutely binary non-negotiables.

34:05Pete:You must do this. As you rightly say, I'm sure it will depend on circumstances. Basically, the reason I have a job, because my job is to know clients well enough to be able to help them navigate the personal finance system for their unique circumstances and their unique personalities. So, you know, if anybody goes on a podcast or YouTube video or on TV or whatever and says, you should do this, I'm generally skeptical, right? So this is going to come down, I think, to how you feel and mostly about your monthly payment. A mortgage is such a massive amount of money and it's such a long time, right?

34:44Pete:that really it comes down to monthly affordability. So, you know, should I get a mortgage as soon as I can afford the minimum deposit? Well, minimum deposit means bigger loan, which means bigger monthly payment. That's what you need to be comfortable with. Or do you stick it out, you know, if you're renting currently, do you stick it out for another year, save a bit more, hence smaller borrowing, hence smaller monthly payment? Only you can answer that question. but essentially I think it comes down to that monthly cost. Yeah, it's really interesting. Go and play on some of the free mortgage calculators because I found seeing it, what happens if I put this much of my deposit in?

35:29What does my monthly payment look like? Because what happens if I put this much in? And I found physically seeing, okay, right, well, it's only, you know, in value of commas, only 50, 60 quid more a month. but actually it's a food shop yeah totally

35:46Pete:you know and that's massive and when you've got to think that there's also council tax water gas food everything still got to run a phone car phone car everything that 50 quid a month can be the difference between feeling pushed and feeling okay a bit more comfortable yeah and if that's and mentally that's crucial so yeah like you say it's truly personal to you but I think you're right about the monthly payment it's how you feel you can cope with it. Yeah. You know, if you're being sort of slightly machine about it rather than human, you'd be like, well, okay, you know, you... You would do the bigger You would overpay.

36:23You know, you don't change your phone

36:26Pete:very often and you overpay and it's just like, come on, let's be real. And yeah. Life is more nuanced than that. Infinitely more nuanced. That's the problem. Yeah, I know. It's a real inconvenience. If we were machines, it'd be easier because you'd make every decision based on the finance and the maths and the logic, but because we're touchy-feely, squishy humans with emotions and fears and concerns, and those emotions, fears, and concerns fluctuate, you know, based on a million reasons, news cycle, you know, what sort of time of the year it is or whatever, all these things are a factor. You've just got to say, well, actually, am I going to be more comfortable with a lower monthly payment or am I comfortable with a slightly higher one?

37:10Pete:but I don't want to rent anymore. Yeah, I completely understand not wanting to rent, especially if you've got your heart set on owning a house. I think it's interesting. You don't want to be, with the monthly payment, you don't want to be pushing yourself to the limit. No. Because if anything were to happen to your income, hopefully you would be at the point with having emergency funds and things. But you don't want to be feeling panic, oh God, I'm going to lose the house. You can not buy a house without emergency funds. No, I know. but let's just say in this situation because you know I'm sure people do of course they do so I think yeah just making sure that you've got a buffer and that you're going to be comfortable month to month because you do need to live as well yeah you do it'll change you obviously you've got this coming I'm thinking of this all the time like okay I'm going to have to change if I have certain beauty appointments well that's not a priority feeding my dog is just send her over to me we'll feed her but you know so you are going to have to change once you've got the commitment but you should still live yes oh definitely and if you know that higher payment each month is going to mean that you don't live is it is it worth it and that's a very subjective question yeah exactly good job all right question five this is from nick james dash l4g it was a youtube comment okay um it was commented on the credit card part two episode.

38:36Pete:Okay. Our credit card's the enemy. Yeah. Our credit card's the enemy. Yeah. Part two. Okay. Great title if I say so myself. Great episode. Thank you. I find credit cards so unnecessarily confusing. I have two that were set up so that they would take the full amount every month by direct debit. So if I ever did want to borrow a larger amount over four or five months, say, how would I stop the direct debit? I'm assuming you can't just cancel it on the banking app won't the credit card people come after you and how do you make payments to them if not by direct debit good question nick james dash i4g or l4g um no for god's sake don't just cancel your direct debit because your credit card company will know that you've done it and you'll get probably a fairly arsy letter before too long or email because you know yeah because it's 2026 yeah okay you'd be surprised though when it comes to stuff like this a lot of This is in writing.

39:30Pete:I know, yeah. But you're still in writing just digitally. I've not had a single letter from my credit card company. Because you've never been late making a payment. I bet you any money if you were late. See, I want to find that, but I'm not going to. No, probably not worth it. Especially not when I'm buying a house. Sorry, continue. There's a knack of your credit score in one easy lesson. Look, so don't just cancel a direct debit. What you need to do is change the agreement with the credit card company. They'll be, believe me, more than happy for you to change it so that you're not paying the full amount of every month.

39:59Pete:Yeah, because it benefits them. They're going to get interest, right? Now, actually, I think it's a great idea to have it so it's forced to pay off every month. But if you, you know, let's say you had a big payment to make and you think, actually, if I make it on my credit card, I'll get points maybe towards my holiday flights or whatever. And you think, yeah, no, that kind of makes sense. And then what you don't want is five grand going out of your account at the end of the month or whatever. So I just changed the agreement but you need to do it at the credit card company's end. Don't change your direct debit.

40:31Yeah. Okay. So make sure that's changed before you make the big payment.

40:35Pete:Yeah. Remember early on, we talked about the difference between standing orders and direct debits. Direct debits, in this case, the credit card company pulls the money out of your bank account. Yeah. Standing order, you push it out. Well, because they're in control of a direct debit, obviously you can cancel it. Yeah, but they ain't going to be very happy about that. And they're going to get notified because they set it up essentially. So don't cancel your direct debit. get onto your credit card company and saying, I want to just change that. It's literally a switch. And they will say, yes. Yeah, absolutely.

41:04Pete:So that is five questions. So I think this needs to come to a swift end. Yes. Otherwise we'll be here forever, which, you know. Well, it'll be an hour and a half episode, which nobody wants. Well, they might want it with me, but maybe not with me. Nobody wants either of us for that long. So we'll carry on next week? yeah I've been thoroughly enjoying answering questions yeah it's nice actually it's a nice change of pace so yeah we will thank you so much for those of you who sent them in if this has tickled your fancy god what's the matter with you if it has if you realise that this would be a really great opportunity for you to answer your question because you've seen that we do it with no judgement and we have a laugh and we have a good time and we also answer your question then please feel free to email us with your questions.

41:54So you can email us at hello at bankofdad.show and just put podcast question in the subject line so that I can sift it out through a fan mail that I get. Yeah, and we're thinking that we're going to dot these question and answer sessions throughout depending on the volume of questions.

42:12Pete:Yeah, you know, if you're doing sort of every 10 episodes or, you know, every couple of months or whatever. But you don't forget a massive influx of them. Maybe we'll do a little bonus episodes. Yeah, something like that. We'll work it out. but keep them coming in hello at bankofdad.show as you say and what's this is episode 20 isn't it yeah so I mean I don't think there will be any show notes but in case there are you can find them on hello at no bankofdad.show forward slash episode 20 I don't think there will be but no I don't think we've covered any links maybe to mortgage calculators yeah I can find some that would be good for yeah money saving expert I'll give you the link beautiful cool Thank you so very much for watching and listening.

42:55Pete:Leave a review if you are listening to this, like they said on iTunes, like it's 1997 then. If you're listening to this on Apple Podcasts, on Spotify, if you can leave us a rating or review, it would really help. Likewise, if you're on YouTube, then like the video and subscribe to the channel if you're not already. It really helps us out. And obviously, you get notified. If you click the notification bell. Oh, yeah, yeah, bell. God, you're starting to sound old. I am, aren't I? I've been doing this for 16 years. I didn't get it wrong. I know. I had to explain Instagram to him quite recently. You've been explaining Instagram to me about a dozen times over the years and I'm still on the one.

43:30That's why I have the access to the accounts.

43:33Pete:Yeah, exactly. Anyway, thank you so much for watching. We'll catch you next time. We'll see you next time. Cheers.

43:52Thank you.