E144 - Everything You Were Told About Approaching Women Is Wrong (Full Attraction Guide)

34:32Like for me, I think a lot of it has come from just as you progress with your career and you develop your people skills. Like I didn't have a whole lot of charisma when I was in my twenties. Like that, that was something which I had to learn and develop myself. And I think thankfully from my profession, you know, when you put yourself out there on camera, on YouTube, naturally you have to, especially if you're doing a vlog, you've got to entertain people. And you're like, how do you become an entertaining, charismatic person? And that is something that just will come with time. As you, one of the best things about what I do is back in the day, I used to edit all my videos.

35:10So I would watch myself. I would study myself. I'd be like, why do I do that?

35:15Tristan Yoder:Why do I say that? like just like weird awkward things that i would pick up on i'm like okay we need to fix that like we need to improve how we do that so that helped me um just become more charismatic more confident and then um just going on loads of dates i think an experience from dating women and different types of women and um you just the confidence will build up you're like okay yeah cool i remember the first I go on like the early days when I would go on a date, I'd be shitting myself. I'd be like, oh my God, this girl is so hot. Like, I don't know how this is going to go. And it would, I would just reek of no confidence and it wouldn't like be a very slow start.

35:59But now, because you kind of, you've become the man, like you've, you've got all this evidence behind you that you've, you walk the walk, you talk the talk. And then it's the, the abundance mindset. I think that's probably one of the most important things. If you naturally have an abundance of women, you don't even need to pretend to have the abundance mindset. You just have it. And you don't need to do any work. But for those people who don't necessarily have an abundance when it comes to choice, that's probably a little bit harder because you need to fake it a little bit. You need to act like, hey, I've got loads of women.

36:30But in reality, deep down, you're like, I'm obsessed with this woman. I really want to make this work because I really like her. But I kind of have to pretend that I don't like her and that I have loads of other options and like, fuck, this is quite hard.

36:41Tristan Yoder:It's the most beautiful starting phase because you're like a baby deer trying to find its legs. Like sitting there trembling underneath the sweat of your brow. Like, oh, she's so beautiful. But after a while, after you go on more and more dates and get with more and more beautiful women and it starts to calm your central nervous system, you're like, all right, she's nervous too. Okay, and then it becomes to the point where you're not even nervous and you can start seeing their nervous patterns and you build yourself up to become the man. And you're like, oh, okay, now the game is in my favor. really good but one thing i tell my students your first hundred approaches it's just the sacrifice to the approach gods you're just you're it's a sacrificial lamb don't expect anything from it if you get laid from it if you get a number from it if you get slapped from it cool all that we're doing right now is collecting data and that's that's the hardest part i think of the game is getting comfortable with understanding that this portion you're not going to get any results it's like with business it's like your first sales calls you're shaking and it's going to be two,$200.

37:40Tristan Yoder:And then afterwards it's like, yeah, yeah. The price is 20 ,000. You just start dropping your balls into it more and more. And when you start getting more, one of the best parts of getting beautiful women is that it inspires you to get even more beautiful women. Like you get that, you get that girl that you think that you could never get and then you get her and then you get tired of her because she's really not that great. She was just the upper echelon of what you could see is your potential as a man. And once you break through that ceiling, you're like, Oh, yeah okay all right i could get hurt who else could i get what's going on and then you start building up that confidence it's like with business it's like bro you sell a first time you sell a thousand dollar package you're like calling your dad you're like oh dad we did we're we're in the big leagues now we made it man we made it and then you sell your first ten thousand dollar package and you're like oh shit what's a hundred thousand dollars look like how do we get there and starts expanding expanding expanding your mind but for those guys that are just getting started out that don't even worry about what we're talking about over here on this like opposite end of the spectrum just focus on getting rejected like walk outside and realize that you're gonna get told no and it's like joining a boxing ring or going to a boxing tournament expecting not to get hit or going outside and walking in the rain thinking you're gonna dodge the rain pellets no don't work like that buddy yeah and one one of the mental reframes that i picked up from alex mosey was once you can feel sorry for your competition like it becomes so much more fun it's like oh i just got rejected 50 times i feel so fucking sorry for the next guy that has to come walk this path because it's a long fucking road but you know because i'm doing it now i get to look back and be like damn it's fucking worth it so worth it so how would you separate the different decades of a man when it comes to dating for example we got one group this is the beginner group where they're late teens okay from i don't know 16 to 20.

39:30Then we have 20 to 30, 30s to 40 and then 40s plus.

39:35Tristan Yoder:I think one of the overarching concepts that you're going to want to impact on all of them is that you need to work on your social skills as a human being. Dating is just a branch of social. The reason that human beings have what we have right now, like it's amazing penthouse, it's amazing city. The society that we have is because we're able to communicate effectively between each other. So between 16 to 55 plus, you always need to be refining your social skills on how to, how do I acknowledge people? How do I say hello to people? How do I present myself in a room? So that's one thing that's going to be overarching.

40:08Tristan Yoder:For the young guys, 16 to 20, you're going to get your heart broken. You're going to play with some fire. You're going to get your ass kicked. Like I remember I was in college, man, and I graduated, ended up moving to Mexico, about 25 at this time. And I hooked up with a sorority president from UC Irvine baller school like in Southern California it's super expensive school and when I'm hooking up with her I'm thinking like why could I never get these types of girls when I was in college and then I looked around I'm in a you know badass villa in saloon computer monitors everywhere and I'm like oh because she's too busy hooking up with guys like me now like it's it's just the game so how old are you now 30 okay yeah so so for those for those younger guys you hey man it's we all go through it delayed gratification guys like i think 30s is probably the absolute prime i mean yeah i'm 35 now and it's i don't think it's ever been better to be honest which is probably one of the the downsides that's not really spoken about too much is when things are going so good and you have so many options then it really does become quite off-putting to actually settle down like if some people go oh mike why not married why don't you have kids yet and i'm like my life is really quite good like um i kind of love my life right now we're balling right now kind of work quite hard to get here so let me enjoy it a little bit so uh yeah that's i mean not that there are many downsides that is a potential downside but yeah it the good times do come but they will be a lot better if you put in the effort in your 20s 100 and for those guys that are coming onto their 20s, I would say focus on personal development in that time space right there.

41:54Tristan Yoder:Focus on your mindset. Focus on your self-speak. How do you talk to yourself? How often are you going to the gym? Focus on building yourself up so that when you get to your 30s, you have a cushion. You can be able to spend some money on some dates. You're able to go ahead and flex a little bit because the game never stops. There's always a new batch of 18-year-olds, 20-year-olds, 24-year-olds, the men that are following in behind you and men that are aging out of the game. never stops and so i love the game like it it's just the fucking sickest thing man to think that life continues on whether we're here or we're not so enjoy it with the time that we have so for those guys that are in their 20s you got to read the books you got to do the journal you got to do the meditations you got to hit the gym you got to i would say the 20s is about facing insecurities becoming aware of what it is that you're scared of inside of yourself and addressing that as a man and if you can go ahead and start to really do that hard work looking yourself in the mirror like thinking like fuck what do i don't like about myself and then the cool thing is like you said just pretty much accepting except height you can change everything about yourself you can if you're overweight you can get skinny if you're skinny you can get big if you're big you can stay there like you can do so much with this time that we have it's being very diligent in your time and where it is that you're putting in your time tokens and then when you get to your 30s man it's oh it's so good it's so good i'm you know i'm 30 30 and a half now and i've just watched the qualities of women that i that i talk to go up i see girls just be way more submissive i see my body starting to you know take real shape and real size and like this i'm excited for the 30s the sake is juicy over here buddy so obviously yeah you've got a lot of good times to come all right guys quick pause here i've got a question for you are you in shape are you not in shape is there work to do most likely if so i have the tool for you which is going to help you out massively it's the thirst app this is something which i personally use myself when it comes to my training and my nutrition i have all the programs in there which i use on a regular basis and for those who are just looking to lose a bit of body fat the same thing goes for women as well a lot of people don't realize that i used to coach for a large chunk of my life so all of my coaching experience has been put inside of this app i want you to learn as much as possible about how to get yourself in shape there's exclusive videos in there telling you how to do it how to execute exercises properly the foods which i eat and a newly added nutrition section where you can track your meals and your daily macros is pretty much this pocket-sized version of myself which i'm going to carry around with you all day every day so if there's something which might interest you which it definitely will do i highly suggest to Check out the link in the description.

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44:42Tristan Yoder:In terms of areas in the world, we're talking about, you know, you've got South America, you've got North America, Asia, Europe. How would you categorize the type of women in those areas? And if a guy is looking for a particular type of woman, And would it help if they spend some time or relocate to those areas or not? This is the thing that pisses me off about American woman. The pussy isn't any tighter. So they have this like, it's like, just because you work harder for it doesn't make it any fucking like sweeter, bro.

45:22Tristan Yoder:So I'm so happy that the passport bros, I'm not like a passport bro, but like the digital nomad lifestyle has come to fruition. because especially if you have a strong passport, you could fly anywhere, bro. And if you have charisma and social skills, you're getting bitches anywhere. Forgive me for, but straight up, like my mindset when I go to a place is like, oh, I'm everybody's type. I'm finding the girl that likes me and I'm going out. And if you have this mindset, bro, you go anywhere. So to speak about it, like North American women, I think the ones that travel and don't get indoctrinated with the constant bombardment of feminist movement.

45:59Tristan Yoder:I don't need a man. City girls throwing ass in the club. Like that is literal poison from people at the top that are just feeding poison pellets into the mind of society. And I'm so happy to be looking at the outside, looking into the United States instead of like, you know, having the, being in the forest, trying to see the trees. Because it is just. Well, I have actually very little experience of dating American women. You're not missing out, buddy. Obviously, I've done a couple of trips there, but um yeah i mean it right now at this point in time it is not exactly that appealing for me and i also noticed that obviously i spend a lot of time here in dubai or in europe you just you have fewer america women women there like they predominantly like to spend most of their time in america yeah so uh yeah i don't have a whole lot of experience bro my biggest turnoff with a woman is when she doesn't have a passport and the only place that that's a thing that's a bro my dick goes soft when i'm talking to an american girl like because you know i have 97 men on my instagram but for the for the three percent that trickles through like there's this beautiful girl that did brazilian jiu-jitsu ass the size of a moon i'm gonna ask man i like like a big girl bro i'm a big ass like a guy i'm gonna argue with that but it's just like this super cool girl and i was like oh where you from she's like oh i'm from louisville kentucky some random fucking part of the states i was like oh you want to come out to bali and visit me and she's like oh no but i don't have a passport yet immediately i'm not responding to that because what the fuck do you mean you're 27 years old you don't have a passport i think it's 50 of the states doesn't have a passport that is absolutely wild i can't believe why that's the mindset of the united states bro like think about that one out of two people in the states doesn't have the passport book that says i can go to mexico okay i can come to dubai why is that you don't how does it work do you want to get a passport you go to the post office pay 125 and wait two weeks that's the that's the literal fucking process and one out of two americans doesn't do it because we're so indoctrinated like i mean you do have you have a lot of choice in america like i will i will give that to america you you've got a lot of variety there's a lot of people you got like the the vibe of new york you got la you got miami other places like inland it's there's a lot of different scenes and vibes but yeah you you should have that curiosity and urge to want to actually go and explore the world a little bit so the thing of the united states is we're so we're sold such a capitalistic lie like especially in the black community man oh my goodness the black community we're indoctrinated with hip-hop music from a very early age one of my first memories as a young child, as watching Lil Wayne on MTV, Fireman.

48:49Tristan Yoder:Oh, yeah, yeah. Fireman. Shout out to my boy Wheezy, man. That's my dog right there. But one of my first memories was looking at the big chains and the watches and the big cars. That's what we value in the United States. We value the very materialistic thing where if you go outside of the States, it's like, what's the world look like? If you're in Europe, it's like, what the fuck? You could take a train to Germany, to Spain, to France, and flights are like 20 euro, 30 euro to go from one country to another. Versus in the States is because it's so massive. We have a very limited view of what looks.

49:25Tristan Yoder:If it doesn't happen in the States, it doesn't happen. Yeah. That's the news media. If it didn't happen in California, Texas doesn't hear about it. New York doesn't hear about it. There's such a big psyop on the attention of the United States that if you don't get out of it, you're just stuck underneath this iron cloud. We, we, we complain about China being, you know, controlling government. We complain about Russia being a controlling government, but the whole time they have the wool pulled over the eyes of the American people. Yeah. Oh, Mexico. No, it's cartel. That's, that's people getting beheaded.

49:58Tristan Yoder:Columbia. Oh, you're going to get drugged. You're going to get robbed. And all of these different premonitions about what it is that's going to happen, that it just dissuades people. And then you combine that with, you need the car. Oh, oh, the reason you're not getting any pussy. you need the car the reason she's not texting back it's because you need to do steroids the reason that you know you're not getting any female attention it's like oh you need to buy this you need to buy this you need the rich or me you need all these different things before you can feel worthy enough as a man to walk forward into a conversation where i'm like bro just go say hi to the bitch like go say hi like start the conversation so america i put that like hey i've met some really cool americans that travel but outside of that like put them lower tier South America the woman can still be very very very much woman like the love that I felt from a 20 year old Mexican girl bro oh my goodness let me sit up in my chair when I talk about this man I had this extremely beautiful 22 year old kindergarten teacher that loved me to tears she would wake up make me coffee in the morning tell me how handsome I am and just the love that she gave me it made me feel like I could run through a mountain bro like just think about that you have a member on your team that just truly believes in you because everything that she's seen around her is not like the most amazing thing and carmen it's like it's not like the most luxurious place in the world and a lot of people live in really modest places but when like you bring her to her your house i had like a two-bedroom house like nothing crazy by any means but she sees this and she just like puts all of her faith and her belief into you yeah but do you not feel as though oh man like if i'm not careful i'm gonna break this girl's heart that's that's the game like you as a man have to be very careful because we've all done it like especially when we're playing the game you sell the dream yeah baby it's you and me we're gonna we're gonna take it to the moon like i think i could see a real future with you and then what happens you break a heart you break two hearts you break three hearts and you realize like damn if i just told him i wanted sex or like had just treated it such as that i might have still gotten what it is that i wanted and i wouldn't have to go like this backtracking now without absolutely destroying them without absolutely destroying them and that's the game bro think about it we've all had you probably broken a heart i've broken a heart i know this motherfucker's broken a heart we're all breaking hearts we're getting hearts broken it's just a cycle unfortunately cyclical that's that's a sad part of the dating scene like when you're in your your late teens or early 20s you're so pure and like innocent and just it's so easy to fall in love like i remember me i would just fall in love so quick i had no control over my emotions and i would get absolutely destroyed i thought fuck that hurt and then it would kind of you know it would happen a couple times more but then you become a little bit more i don't know if you become like fully immune to it but you just have way more control over your emotions and i guess you're just a lot better adapted at dealing with a breakup or a relationship coming to an end but that like because you've being on the receiving end of it like i'm very aware of them also potentially experiencing the same thing and i do not i'll meet some people i know look if i don't if i don't be fully truthful or up front it's not going to end well and i don't want to be the reason why somebody is very upset or heartbroken so i've come to the realization now it's as you said much better to just be more upfront to begin with and just tell them like this is this is my life right now this is what's going on i am really not at a phase where i want to you know start a family or do this do that at least kind of prepare them a little bit so they they don't because i've noticed a lot of women will especially if they're having a good time good experience they will all of a sudden start to envision this future of you and her together this fairy tale of how everything is going to be in their perfect world and a lot of time it's not going to be like that and it's not necessarily your fault because i i i very rarely not for a very very long time like lied and promised oh we're going to do this we're going to do that like i'm i feel like i'm a lot more honest now so i never sell them the dream but there's a lot of guys who will be doing that and i don't like i don't agree with that i don't think that like lying and selling women a false future in the hopes of getting laid i don't think is uh ethical approach um so two quotes you remember what uncle ben said from spider-man oh yeah with great power comes great responsibility yeah so when you start playing the game and you start to understand the game better you you don't have to sell them that like i remember being a young guy like oh women don't want to have casual sex women just don't want to hook up like like oh i gotta you know only only girls want to be girlfriends and i can only have sex with this girl i'm in a committed relationship but that was my mindset that was told to me so i wanted sex and you know i didn't want to go through the like oh if i tell her i just want sex she's gonna she's gonna break up with me or like it's not gonna be anything so you know early teen late teens early 20s you're selling the dream selling the dream you break some hearts and it's like wow this pain that i'm causing to people is not worth it at all it hurts me and it hurts them and like now you start looking at yourself a little bit differently like why did i do that and you have to go through a self-reflection progress to go and answer that but for the for the guys that um are still doing that there's still time to change like please stop like if you're watching this right now and you you have a girl that you know really likes you and you're not really that interested in her and you're stringing her along because we all know it feels so good women do it all the time like we were at the party yesterday and this beautiful filipina girl with massive tits and blonde hair is just stringing my boy along and at the end of the party she's like oh i love my boyfriend he's like bitch why did you tell me that why did you not tell me that two hours ago sitting here pursuing after me what the fuck come on so so if you're if you're one of those guys that's stringing along just just know karma comes and karma is not one of those things that has to be an event karma could be like you're thinking about it and it's taking you out of the present moment and now you're not able to live fully present because you have that fear behind it karma is not like oh you you fall and break your leg karma is like you're afraid yeah breaking your leg yeah yeah do you feel as a coach a dating coach you have some sort of responsibility to you know you're you're almost giving these men tools to get what they want yeah do you ever have to speak to them or tell them hey okay now you have this responsibility and you you have the skills to do this don't be a fucking dick yeah yeah i feel like um dumbledore yeah in in harry potter like uh like yeah you can use these spells to cause serious harm or you can use these spells to enrich your life and and you know create honest business like um i mean you've probably seen it core sellers they come in they scam a bunch of people that make some money and then their reputation is ruined for the rest of their days you know it's great power great power to sell somebody a lie or a dream and i take it upon myself to be very genuine and what it is that i promise like you're gonna get kicked in the face in the field you're gonna you're gonna want to cry i've cried after after a rejection before fucking punching my steering wheel that bitch said this oh i can't believe it this last week

57:26Tristan Yoder:yeah fuck that bitch sheriff but no it's uh with great power comes great responsibility and like you said the cyclical nature of it like beautiful girl meets a guy that's gotten his heart broken in the past the player he breaks her heart she goes down and breaks his heart and then he comes up and becomes a player and then it's over and over and over and over again but this is the great thing of these podcasts and like the information that's out there there's been There's more information in this moment than have ever been available to humanity. And then it's going to continuously like go in that path.

57:59Tristan Yoder:We're not regressing in information. We're progressing at breakneck speed. So these podcasts are so monumental for there could be some kid that's 16 years old in Sri Lanka watching this right now and being like, dang, like, shout out my boy Lamar.

58:16Heartbreak pending.

58:25Tristan Yoder:but but you got also you know that i have i have clients that are mid-30s late 40s been through like they had one girlfriend their entire lives had two kids stayed together for the kids sexless marriage and are now in the dating field 40 plus sometimes 50 plus no idea what's going on and they can you know gain information from this and enrich their lives as well it's not only it's it's across the board um so okay so two questions what stage do you think somebody would benefit from having a coach like yourself and why should they go to you i think once you have a decent enough financial standing there you know that you're not you know scraping by you can afford because dates are an investment you're investing into the woman so if if a guy is looking to get a dating coach making sure that you you feel comfortable in your social in your financial situation to invest in yourself to invest into the people that you're going on dates with looking at a date not as an expenditure, but as like, this might be the mother of my kids.

59:19Tristan Yoder:Like you never know that girl that's walking in the coffee store right now that you're looking at, she could very well be the person that farts next to you in the morning. Like that can be your person forever, you know? So to look at it like that. And another thing is sometimes there's a stigma around hiring a dating coach and it's like, Oh yeah, I don't want to admit that I have a problem there. And for those guys, I tell them like, yeah, you know what? I'm going to sign up for this boxing tournament. Why do I need a coach? You just go and start swinging. You know, I'm going to, I see red and I start fighting or like, oh, you know, I'm gonna go swimming.

59:46Tristan Yoder:I don't know. I don't need to know how to swim. I'm just going to start, you know, flaying my arms around. Like you can get seriously hurt going out there without proper guidance or like, oh, you know, I don't need a physical trainer. I'm just going to go, you know, put 225 on the bar and see what happens, you know, like no, no, there's, there's prepare yourself. Yeah. Be willing. There's, there's the will to win, you know, that dog mentality, like I'm going to win. But then there's also the will to prepare to do the work necessary to put yourself in the best possible situation to get the most that you can out of the situation for those guys.

1:00:19Tristan Yoder:And here's the thing, man. It doesn't matter if you're 25. It doesn't matter if you're 45. If you're continuously seeing opportunities in your life to go and be social and connect with women and you watch them pass you by, reach out to me. Like just see what it could be like to work together because every single time that you don't approach that woman is you're forfeiting an opportunity with the universe. The universe works like this. If I take a step towards it, it takes a step towards me. But a lot of guys will look at the fireplace and they say, give me heat and then I'll give you wood. It doesn't work like that.

1:00:52Tristan Yoder:You have to feed the fire first before you can receive the warmth. You have to be, you have to be the change in your life. Yeah. For those guys, reach out, man. yeah it's funny because there's been times when i was younger where i was too timid to approach and i'd seen someone who i thought man like they were beautiful but i didn't have the balls to go up to them and i let them go and then i would beat myself up the next like day to be like why the fuck was i such a pussy why didn't i speak to that person because who knows what could happen if i'd actually approached that person maybe not it might not work might got rejected but something could have come from that but i was too scared to do it i think nothing happened every man realizes this like the relief that you get after a rejection hey i tried yeah like the when you see that beautiful girl and like i call it the flinch like people ask me do i still get nervous when i go on approach it's like the threshold is now a lot higher but you know when you see that beautiful girl holy shit okay that's like a video game notification saying treasure treasure there's something to be gained right here um give me an example of a scenario which in your mind you think hey this is a fucking challenge sure for you for me it's like the the like the girls that come from wealth you know like you can smell her perfume from a mile away and like she just has velvety soft skin and you know that you know she's got some multi-millionaire inside of her dms because that's the world that she lives in that for me all right it's a show time like yeah i put on the glasses these are my superman glasses like i turn from it's like uh this is this is tristan this is tristan social like all right baby like come on this is my boys call me cameron like my middle name is cameron like uh but you turn on an alter ego to be able to address this fear like um i tell the girls that i date like yeah you're gonna get tristan but online is tristan social it's kind of like you know you have john cena wwe but then you have john you know like john seen as an extension of john but you have to turn that character on sometimes to fight the battle to face the demons to to to just slay the dragon because there's a version of you that's going to stay in bed swipe on your phone not going to approach jack off there's a version of you that sits up straight in his chair looks at the beautiful girl walks forward He's throat jiggling because he's so nervous, but still is addressing it and attacking it.

1:03:20And, you know, when we take an action, we train ourselves in that way.

1:03:25Tristan Yoder:Like the brain is just a computer. We're programming ourselves with every action that we take to be able to say, okay, when this arises, I do this. Or when this arises, I do that. And you have to ask yourself at the end of the day, bro, like what type of computer do I want to have? What am I doing with my life? How do women view the content you put out there? Great question, man. My Instagram is an amazing filtration process because you would think like. Yeah, I should have read it. There's going to be some people probably get quite offended by. Absolutely. Absolutely. Like I've had girls come up to me.

1:03:57Tristan Yoder:I mean, I've had, I think more relationships end than start because of my Instagram. Like think about. Wait, so you're already in a relationship and then you would post some. No, like a connection. Like say I get a girl's number or I get her Instagram. I've had more of those like fizzle out or end than like my Instagram has started like people reaching out to me on Instagram are like oh I saw this guy's profile I want to reach out to him because like think about it you have to be kind of either in extremely secure or a little bit insane to go you know talk and communicate with a guy that his entire profile is him talking to women or talking about women and social skills of it so for me is it's it's an amazing filtration process.

1:04:37Tristan Yoder:Like, I don't know if a girl sees my Instagram and she still wants to hang out with me afterwards. There's no secrets now. Like, Hey, this is, this is what it is, baby. You can, it works so perfectly with that. Like, there's no question of, Oh, is he talking to other girls? It's like, how many other girls is he talking to? And is he going to make me feel special? He's going to make me feel like I was with this Filipino girl that I was hanging out with last night that we met at the beach party. She comes over to the crib. She, she sees my Instagram. Like we're hanging out, we're hanging out the party.

1:05:01Tristan Yoder:She comes back with us in the Lambo, rolling in the lambo you know my boy nak driving she's swerving back and forth it's like it's a great experience do buy baby do bizzle but we come back to the crib and like we're laying down in bed and she starts pulling hairs out of her head and she's like i'm gonna leave these for the next girl to to show that you know i've been here i'm like i'm picking them out of the out of the bed in the morning i'm like this bitch really did it oh my god so like once women love a man that doesn't give a fuck about what they think like women love a man that's a man before anything else before you're mike thurston before you're tristan yoder before you're a doctor before you're a celebrity you're a motherfucking man and and putting that flag in the ground and saying this is what i am i'm not gonna hide around it yeah when you are unapologetically just yourself and i've like i noticed when i was when i was younger i would i would try to hide myself and you can only keep that shrug for so long before they you know it's just it's not gonna work like they they have to like you as you are otherwise you know what's the point yeah and sometimes girls will come up to me like i find your content so repulsive i'm like good it's not meant for you like like your algorithm is completely different than the people that i'm trying to to reach and you would never buy one of my programs anyways that is the last thing that you would do with your credit card so i i'm glad that it repulses you like um owen cook talks about this he's a really cool guy he says i hate it when i don't get haters on my instagram because like when when you reach a new audience you're gonna have haters like if you're just in an echo chamber of people that agree with your opinions and especially when it comes to dating man there's so many divided opinions my stance on dating is this if you like yourself other people are gonna to like you straight up and if you you do the marketing of going out and talking to women and doing the hard work the things that guys are too pussy to do nowadays because it's so easy to optimize your dating profile get the ai photos pay you know the five thousand dollars for the for the mentorship on the tinder algorithm and the va and it's so easy to do that but it you know it takes a real man to go outside and be willing to get punched in the face by rejection say fuck it we're doing it and then it takes an even cooler guy to be able to say i don't even need to do that because when with everything that you build every action that you take you're like taking a step forward towards the future that you want and i'm like super excited for you because you're sitting on the mountaintop right now just like what's next what's going on what's the next move from here and it takes a long time to get there but it's so worth it from the view yeah what's your opinion on female dating coaches and female dating coaching female dating coaches who are coaching the men because i've i mean there's been some that have come on my podcast um i mean we've had some very interesting conversations but i think one thing that's quite apparent to me is a female will never fully understand what goes on on the inside of a man i think female dating coaches are a waste of time i'll just straight up say it like that because why would you ask of fish how to fish.

1:08:12Tristan Yoder:I think that there are extreme nuggets that they can give you, that they can like, oh, you can understand this psychology. This is what I experienced there. And I even have women coaches in my program that can go ahead and help guys transform themselves. But at the end of the day, man, like she's never going to understand you and what it is to have, you know, a pulse of fucking testosterone come from your balls when you see a beautiful woman right there and like the amount of fucking nerves that go into it. Like. approaching women can be the scariest thing that somebody does. I've seen people build multi million dollar businesses to circumvent.

1:08:49Tristan Yoder:To avoid the approach. I've seen men get to 250 pounds, lean 3 % body fat to avoid approaching women. Cause they think it'll help them. And at the end of the day, just going into it. But when it comes to female dating coaches, they can give you some information, but they can't teach you the whole game. They can never understand what, what it goes into just. Yeah, there's been some good ones that have popped up on my feed. I'm like, okay, this is a fairly valid point. She seems to be coming from the point of view that is a way that a man would think, which is, okay, fair enough. But I think there would certainly be some areas that are going to be lacking.

1:09:28Tristan Yoder:well you think about it like this like a single mother can do an amazing job raising a son but she can never teach him how to be a man you know a dating a female dating coach can do an amazing job teaching you female psychology but they can she can never teach you what it's like from the man's perspective and i have all the respect in the world for female dating coaches and make your money like if there's people out there that'll pay you but when it comes to me it's like i wouldn't recommend one of my students like have a conversation maybe hop on a podcast get the information but like what you're going to gain from the experience in the field going on the dates getting the rejections getting heartbroken getting ghosted like that that builds you up so much more than what the perspective like any amount of coaching yeah like there's there's nothing that can replace experience nothing the thing of hiring a coach is just cutting down on your experience time do you want this to take one year do you want it to take 10 years yeah it's like it's like me if i'm gonna hire a mentor or work with someone i want to find someone who is basically the version of me but 20 years older 30 years older like they've lived my life and they've done like all the things which i want to do i'm like okay you've already done it tell me right now what fucking mistakes do i need to avoid making because if i'm gonna get you know this this is the problem like there are some people who are in you know amazing marriages and they offer great relationship advice but they maybe have only been with one or two women in their life and they've been married their entire life so it's like yeah for you like you you have this amazing life you have this amazing relationship and marriage but i have a very different life to you so yes you can give me advice on how to maybe maintain like a wholesome and loving relationship but you know another thing which is this sounds harsh but you know they're with a fairly average woman sure and what has worked for them isn't necessarily going to work with a 10 out of 10 baddie who has all the attention in the world like how do you keep and satisfy a woman like that the the rules are kind of a little bit different and so people ask me especially women they're like oh you're a dating coach why are you not in a in a relationship i'm like i'm not a relationship coach i teach men how to approach women that's my area of expertise i teach how to overcome approach anxiety and and follow that as far as it goes like i'm not a marriage counselor i have no idea how to to go about that part of the relationships or that part of dating all the way down to the end no no no so yeah even even when people ask me some people ask me for for advice like look i'm not i'm maybe not the best person to get advice when it comes to relationship at this point in time maybe 10 20 years i can talk more about it right now all i can talk about is my experience from what i've done seen and you know and guys will come to me like hey tristan can you teach me how to go pick up girls in the club i'm like there's way better coaches than me like i'm When it comes to daytime, cafe, beach, coffee shop, grocery store, street, come on, let's do it.

1:12:44Tristan Yoder:But like loud environment, I'm not a big drinker. I don't like loud music in my ear trying to have a conversation with a girl. Some guys specialize in that. Go talk to them. But it's really important when you're looking at the mentor that you're looking to invest into. Because it's not only a money investment, it's a time investment, it's an energy investment. it. And one of the people, one of the philosophers that I look up to, Bob Proctor, he said it really greatly. He said, don't ask if you're worthy of your goals. Ask if your goals are worthy of you. Because there's only one of you and there's billions, an infinite amount of goals that you can choose from.

1:13:18Tristan Yoder:And we only have so much time on this planet. So when you're looking at it, is it worthy of you? Is it worthy of your time? Is it worthy of this energy? The only thing that you really have in this life? And when you can answer that question, it becomes a lot, the game becomes way more fun it's like oh 10k a month like i hope i can get there it's like no like what what are you doing to make 10k a month worthy of you or 50k a month or 100k whatever your financial goals or whatever your dating goals are you will get there if you have discipline and attention towards that but make sure it's worth it before you go barking at the wrong tree so do you generally advise guys to go with the old-fashioned approach in person or would you still give advice for those who are thinking about sliding the DM?

1:13:59Tristan Yoder:Well, here's the thing. I'm not against DM game. I'm not against dating apps. I'm not against any of that. But I am against you being one-sided. Like, if you... Because I have really successful friends involved. Super, super successful friends. And they can hook up with a girl, two girls a day off of Bumble and Tinder. Just clockwork. But when it comes to approaching the girl outside, they'd rather cut their pinky off because it's just something they haven't practiced so i'm like if you can be lethal in all areas of game why not if this is something fun to you if it's something important to you this is something that you could see yourself investing in and seeing the benefits from bro get good at online dating get good at cold approach get good at social circle get good at everything and figure out what works best for you because for some guys that like the super analytical guys sometimes social circle is better where you start hosting events for me i don't really give a fuck about you know the process and the pain of going through i love going outside looking at a beautiful girl talking to her either getting her number or gonna go get a coffee right there like man oh have you ever done an instant date like what was the definition of an instant date an instant date is when you see a beautiful girl and you don't ask for her phone number you just go on a date with her right there from that moment oh buddy you feel like a movie director like you you walk up to a beautiful girl you start talking to her hey what are you doing right now oh you want to grab a coffee you go get a coffee and then like it the game is on from that point and now you're like how do i fandangle how do i maneuver this do we go from this location to this location you end up back at your crib you end up hooking up with a girl like it's like a porn movie essentially you hook up with a girl that you have never met i love that It's like the fruits of war.

1:15:42Tristan Yoder:I'm telling you, man, to go outside into the field, see a beautiful, like a captive or a Pokemon or like a flower that you want to capture. Capture it. You can hold on to it. You can let it go. But like that moment, I'm just like, it's humanity right there, bro. You feel alive. Woo! Yeah, I think with my experience, I don't really tend to slide in DMs anymore. i think what have you seen that meme where there's like a jester like doing the dancing like trying to get her into her fucking focus or attention and there's literally hundreds of other guys doing the same thing like the chances of you standing out are going to be pretty slim so for me like i would much maybe i fight i see them online maybe i come across their profile and if they're not in my area or in dubai i'm like i'm not i'm not interested i'm not about to go try and start up some long distance relationship online fuck that no if they are based in my area then okay they're without being too much of a stalker maybe if they're if they're going to like a certain gym or they're going to be in a certain area like i'll try and make some sort of natural in-person uh introduction occur but apart from that you know if somebody slides into my gym that's different because they're already interested and to be honest like the balls in my court but for me to do it the other way around like and as i said earlier it's like i want to be very careful if i ever do the sliding in because they might be screenshotting and then sharing it with other people so as i said it's like very i'm not spitting much game that's your game though yeah that's that's you built up the game to to play it this way and you get the results that you get and like i salute to you brother like it's it's so cool because whoever you learn from is who you're going to like become like like if you learn the mike thurston game you're going to build up a sick-ass youtube following and become a personal brand and like you're going to farm your leads that way if you follow the tristan social method you're going to go outside spend some time talking to people and do that if you learn like uh the the club promoter game you're gonna you know run that game and whatever appeals to you um but like something that i want to call out that you you said it's like that's your game that's what you developed over your time and i could never replicate the mike thurston game because i'm not mike thurston i could never replicate the lamal game or the brandon game or the the any person's game because it's going to be my game i could take pieces from it like i played the long game so fucking if you want instant results he's taking some time to do that yeah but salute to you bro play game recognizes game 100 and they're a player in it for sure how do you think you you will change over the next 10 years you're 30 now i'm pretty sure when you're 40 yeah you would have changed quite a bit i would imagine i would find myself doing more calculated events like after this we're gonna go hang out with my boy tanya shout out my boy tanya um showed mad love since landing here in dubai but he hosts like big barbecues and that it requires a lot more calculation a lot more like long-term game but i see myself yeah 40 you're not really going out and approaching so much more um it's a little bit fucking weird it's it's it's because you progress in the game you start evolving in the game and for the guys that want to learn approach like if you're 40 do it do it if that's something that you desire do it but as you start to you know get more refined in the game and get better at the game.

1:19:20Tristan Yoder:You want to evolve in the game. You want to start, you know, having the fruits of your labor work for you instead of the other way around. So over the next 10 years, I see myself building up the brand. Like this has been a super inspiring, like we got to get the YouTube fucking going. We have to. Instagram is cool. We got a million followers over there, but like the real meat and potatoes, the real sauce, YouTube. So start building up the YouTube. And, you know, I'm really exploring the idea of having like two solid wives. like two girls oh shit okay i love it oh my goodness because you see what neo's doing they got like three i don't know are they wives or are they just girlfriends they they're they're in the relationship together it's not individual relationships they are literally bro i i see that and i'm like that looks fucking exhausting like no i've thought about that so so it's there's a relationship math if you have you know one girlfriend that's one relationship if you have two girlfriends now that's three relationships that you have to it's not only the relationship with her the relationship with her but the relationship between them that you have to go in and do from my perspective i've seen so many men get in and out of relationships but maybe it's like a girl they wanted attracted to or like they had kids with or whatever the situation is but they stay in a relationship for so much longer than they should have or could have because of the fear of getting back into the market yeah god that's so common bro yeah oh my goodness there's it's like they're literally stringing the relationship along because they're both too afraid to be single 100 what a fucking mess that is so this is this is why i struggle with marriage this is this is right here 54 of marriages in the united states end in divorce and that's not including the other x percentage that are just not happy not happy miserable so out of this establishment say maybe i'll be generous 20 are actually happy inside of it and can see it's like all the way through like you ever tell me i'm getting to a business deal with somebody for life and there's a 20 success chance yeah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah and especially as you build yourself up as a man you've seen it like like what's the benefit of of locking down with just one and yeah from your perspective like yeah um i think just as i've as i've got older and i think the culture is changing it's not like a source statistic of the amount of people who are getting married worldwide and it's just it's it's going down okay so less people are getting married and then a lot of people who are getting married a lot of people getting divorced so i i feel like it's just dependent upon the person like for example like my my brother like he's got married and you know he's got his family and it's perfect for him i don't know if it's necessarily perfect for me maybe if i meet the right person it would be the right path to go down but i am not really fully sold on it at this point in time and i i can't see myself being sold on it i want kids for sure for sure and i will do everything in my power to be a good father and uh raise those kids the way that i should but to sign a piece of paper like um like why why do i need to get the government involved from my experience most governments around the world corrupts fucking don't actually provide a huge amount of benefit so why do you need to be all up in my relationship like no so um yeah i i don't have the best view on it and i think i'm gonna go to new york in june and hopefully uh i'll get a podcast with james sexton oh no you know divorce lawyer so i'll be prodding him i mean if anyone's got he's probably got more experience seeing the the negative side of marriages i'm sure there's a lot of upsides but i'd be interested to speak to him but yeah it's um it's not up there on my list of things that i want to do to be quite honest but it's the culture's changing for sure it's like the the world of dating is changing and ever changing social media has completely turned everything around and i think it's not really been of benefit for relationships, stable relationships.

1:23:34I think social media is quite a big problem.

1:23:38Tristan Yoder:Not when it comes to dating. I think it's great for dating. But to have healthy relationships, I think it's really hard now. I want you to consider this. The world that we know of online dating is an absolute infant in the grand scheme of time. Think about this. When did Instagram introduce DMs? 2020? 12 it goes down in the dms it goes like when that song came out that was the real inception of what we see and then tinder came out and bumble and all this what we know of the effects of online dating is limited to call it 15 years at most and look at the massive amount of impact that it's had men are more pussy than ever nowadays to go up and go talk to a girl women are more masculine ever nowadays to go ahead and like like oh no i'll never get married i'm gonna focus on myself and my career and don't want to have kids and like what is happening is going to have impact on humanity for millennium to come and we're not going backwards we're only going forwards into ai bro ai sex robots oh yeah we haven't even touched the base on that man to have a a lifelike creature that loves you doesn't talk back submissive loves loves all your stupid jokes cooks your coffee at 47 degrees celsius just the way that you like it on a timer like bro i fuck me man there's gonna be a lot of men that don't reproduce just because the power of ai and i think part of me is like bro fuck that that like one of the most amazing gifts that you can have as a man is waking up to a beautiful girl you guys had sex last night you wake up you just or girls in your case or you look around and you're like oh shit that is an amazing feeling too man but just to wake up and to realize out of that moment of slumber oh shit I trusted this person enough to lay next to me it's just a beautiful fucking thing that I feel like a lot of men may never experience in their life going further and further AI girlfriends I got a buddy of mine named Shine he loves his AI agent like loves her and I can see why the way that she talks about him the way that she talks to him Shine is my king and I love this man this man is awesome but I fear like what if what if that is a solution for I don't think for him he gets girls but for a lot of men that this person this thing this idea this computer program GPU that just tells you everything that is that you want to hear never talks back I mean, it sounds pretty nice right now.

1:26:18It sounds pretty damn sweet.

1:26:20Tristan Yoder:Like, fuck, where can I get one of those? Where are the AI robots coming out, man? Shit. But that's the beauty of the game here, man. There's a really cool philosopher. I call him a philosopher. Shout out to my boy, Game God Goldie. It's my guy right there. But he says, you know, if a woman is right 70 % of the time, that's a good woman. Because if she was right 100 % of the time, she'd be a man and she wouldn't need you. And, like, just when you have that idea, like, women are going to mess up. I love it when my girl messes up. I love it when we're driving on the motorcycle and she misses a direction on GPS or, you know, she washes my shirt and it becomes pink because she makes it with the reds.

1:26:54Tristan Yoder:Like, I love when that should happen because it shows that she's still human and she still looks up to me for leadership. And I think what happens so many times in relationships is that the man stops growing. He stops evolving himself. And then as soon as you become predictable to a woman, it's the biggest pussy dryer that you could ever imagine. yeah like think about for anybody that's been in long-term relationships think about the first time you had sex with somebody and think about the last time you had sex with somebody completely different experiences and it comes to the point maybe six months into the relationship 12 months in the relationship it's like okay it's tuesday at 8 45 p.m you know we just did we just had dinner our weekly dinner night and you know i'm gonna do this i'm gonna do this move she's gonna do that move she's gonna come i'm gonna come and then it's just man i think that's one of the saddest things about a lot of relationships is how amazing it is at the start and how it can just completely fizzle out and lose all of its fire and there is i think some relationships are just that just happens but there are some i think if you if you put it it's work really you're gonna put in the work what happens in the honeymoon phase doesn't feel like work because it's just natural it's all these chemicals are involved like you're getting to know them everyone's on their best behavior and then a certain amount of time passes and then okay as you said things start to get a little bit more predictable you know you maybe you get a little bit bored you want some novelty and it's yeah that's for me because i've met some women i thought and it hasn't really it's fizzled out after a while i'm like fuck it's such a shame why did that happen why can't that continue is that just life is that just biology and how it works or Or is there a way for it to, I guess it can't ever continue like it did at the start.

1:28:37It can evolve. But you both need to put in the work to allow for that relationship to mature and grow.

1:28:45Tristan Yoder:And here's the thing that I tell girls that want to be, you know, stay at home moms or like the trophy wife. That's work too. Like, think about it. Like you have a man that has the financial ability to be able to pay for your lifestyle. You think you're just going to lay around and, you know, go to Pilates here and there. you need to be studying your man you need to be studying the person that it is it's providing for you because just the same way that he got you he can get another one and another one that that concerns me in today's world how there's a lot of women who are not willing to put in the work to keep a man it's actually very easy to get a guy from a woman's point of view it's quite easy to get a fucking guy but to keep the guy that requires work and that requires effort of you actually learning how men operate.

1:29:32And the problem is when you actually find out the reality, you're not going to like it. It's probably going to offend you. But those ones that do have the most success have actually, they've accepted that. And they're like, okay, this is how a fucking guy works. I'm going to learn more to understand how the mindset of a guy works and how I can actually keep him interested over a long period of time. Because ultimately that's what they want. Most women, they want to get married or they want long-term relationships. not mad i don't know if they all want kids these days but a lot of them do they have that vision of having that that family and you can't just by being hot alone i ain't gonna work with smart guys

1:30:11Tristan Yoder:that's the american lie right there like that's that's the the city girls that's the megan the stallion that's the the the image that they put out there like oh you know i'm a bad bitch put me in chanel and yeah that's that's the value that you bring to the relationship you're a liability bitch at that point like you're a financial leak yeah like if i have to pay for your lifestyle and pay for your upkeep and the only thing that you're providing me some pussy i'll go get a procedure to that point it's a lot it's a lot cheaper investment like holy shit you know i stopped there's a there's a really big moment in my life where i stopped envying other men that had other women i you know it started off as enemy then it turned into a salute and now i actually feel sometimes sorry for guys i look at a guy that has a beautiful girl on his arm and i just know oh, he's fucking sick of her shit.

1:30:55Tristan Yoder:Oh, he's fucking, he's over, he's over this bitch, man. That guy's wallet's getting drained, yo. Oh, man. It is. It's so funny. You're right. I look at some guys and I'm like, poor guy, man. Fuck. I don't exactly what he's going to do. Like, nah, absolutely not worth it. Oh, man. But some people are so affected by the court of public opinion that they can't even get out of that relationship. say say it's you know average looking guy or somebody that you know has some has some success in business and he's gotten used to how he feels when other people see him with a beautiful girl he he's he's trapped essentially he cares more about the other it's the status in it yeah yeah and one thing that like one thing that i love man it's like i've had gorgeous women just argentinian ballerinas and french oh ass the size of pluto So, but what I love is a girl that loves me.

1:31:57Tristan Yoder:I love a girl that just looks up to me. She loves the smell of my dirty drawers and just like makes the bed in the morning. I could fart around her and like just be my natural self. That's the girl that I stick around. That's the girl that knows that I'm going to go, you know, talk to other women. That's the girl that I'm going to make sure she's all right and she's good because she allows me to be me. I don't have to adulter or change or, you know, tiptoe around any topics. I got a girl like that right now. And she's, I don't have a lot of long-term visions of women, but she knows the two wives and the game and she's, she's playing a role very well.

1:32:33Where's she from?

1:32:34Tristan Yoder:She's from Indonesia. Okay, nice. And she's actually a really smart girl too. Like you would think like these girls are, you know, poor girls. Her family's got mad money. She's got a degree in law. She's opening up a cafe in Bali and super good girl, but she just understands like, this is how men are. She understands like the likelihood of me keeping Tristan to myself and this like the selfish desire. I'm like, you got to break it down to a girl sometimes. Would you rather have all of a grape or half of a watermelon? Because you can have that guy that works at McDonald's. Like, I don't know, no harm and no shade on working at McDonald's.

1:33:09Tristan Yoder:But like for the woman that want that man to provide for her and let her just go to Pilates and drink matcha and have her toes out on the sand and not have to look at any of the bills. like you think that your pussy's gonna keep him loyal just and you're not playing the game you're not studying him you're not figuring out what time he likes his coffee in the morning and how he likes his back scratched and like treating it like a homework assignment your days are numbered yeah i think it's quite noticeable here in dubai like the the top of the top super successful guys with like crazy money like the the wives or the the mothers of their kids they know like okay he's doing his his debauchery i'm just gonna kind of turn a blind eye to it but it's almost something they sign up to but that almost comes with the package maybe not always because i think there are some there are some super successful people who they seem to almost have it all and at least from the outside they seem like they're loyal yeah and i i actually really admire that and i want to learn from those people because i'm like okay, this is interesting.

1:34:18You have your kids, you've got your wife or you've got your partner, and you still have all of these options, yet you choose to say no. I want to know what's going through your mind. How have you, why have you been able to resist all of that temptation?

1:34:36Tristan Yoder:One of the guys that comes to mind when you speak about that, Mark Cuban. I've heard stories of him, like he's the owner of the Dallas Matters. He has whatever option. He's dope. if you get him on the podcast let me know man i'll be i'll be sitting right there taking notes come on come on mark come on man i'll fly to Dubai for that man oh man you get mark on the podcast but he's he's one of those guys where it's like i don't know if if they're just necessarily wired different or that's their true desire because when i look at it it's like i maybe they're differently wired as men because as a man of the biology that I know as a man, how I understand the hardware that we have, our systems are designed to spread as much sperm as possible.

1:35:18Tristan Yoder:Like just start, pow, pow, pow, pow. Every time that we ejaculate, we release 300 million sperm, the size of the United States. And there's a really cool book called Sperm Wars. I really recommend it because it teaches you, like, why is the dick shaped the way that it is? Why do girls cheat? Hey, bro, why didn't you gift me that book? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:35:38Because we've got to come back for the second podcast.

1:35:40Tristan Yoder:I'm going to come back and surprise you. I'm going to come back and surprise you. But with this book, it teaches you like women are very much designed to have one partner because they only have X amount of eggs. Like born, you have all the eggs that are going to be inside you for the rest of your life. You need to protect those. But we as men. Yeah. Yeah. But I think of some of these people, are we talking like top of the top, like Jason Statham. Sure. Chris Hemsworth, David Beckham, Ronaldo. Like, come on. like what's really going down are these guys like being 100 loyal that's the question that's the question because nobody very very few people will know maybe they are but maybe they're not maybe it's just all that they have to keep up the image and the brand i'm a family man i have like great morals and i do not do anything behind her back or maybe everything is kind of pre-arranged behind closed doors because they they are like the top of the top they're attractive they got the status they got all the money in the world so you know tell me like what's actually going on i would love to know yeah yeah i kind of think i know but i would actually like love to know because if they are still being 100 loyal with their partner then fucking hell fair play respect to that that'd be an interesting mindset to try and understand like damn you gotta get them on the pod man oh yeah like they're gonna open up about that like oh so by the way i've said this before but yeah every tuesday i thought yeah that's probably why they don't do a fucking podcast they'll be idiots like me asking those stupid questions like you're just gonna get up and walk off all right it was a podcast then hey jason what's your body count when was the last time you got some strange buddy

1:37:42good stuff bro i enjoyed this conversation yeah it's been good what what would you um how would you summarize it what would you what advice would you give to those people who are not having the best of luck when it comes to dating get around some winners get around some

1:37:55Tristan Yoder:people that are winning the game and play the game how they play it and start to adapt it and then get into bigger markets. I know a lot of guys in rural New York or bumfuck Texas, Texas. My rule is for all my clients, if you give me foot traffic, I'll get you laid. We need at bats. We need you to go and get rejected over and over so we can start refining the game. And then this is it. The game is winnable. The game is 100 % winnable. What defines a game is an end goal and rules to get there. So when you think about basketball, okay, you can't just punch the guy in the face. You have to play amongst the rules to go ahead and get the ball into the basket.

1:38:34Tristan Yoder:Wrestling, jujitsu, skateboarding, there's all rules to the game. So if it wasn't a game, it wouldn't be fun. I'll tell you, can I talk about an LSD trip that I had? Yeah. So I was working for Coachella. It wasn't in Dubai, by the way. No, definitely not. Definitely not. Definitely not. Definitely not. I was working for Coachella fresh out of college. And they put me in this big-ass villa in Palm Desert, maybe like 20 minutes away from the Coachella Festival. And I ended up taking, I think, like two or three tabs of LSD, and I have a crazy trip. I've changed my Instagram name to You Need LSD. I go on Instagram Live.

1:39:11Tristan Yoder:Complete psychotic. Just a crazy trip. This shit was wild, bro. But at the end of the trip, I'm taking a shower in the bathroom I'm looking at myself in the mirror and like i'm like dealing with all this stress and all these negative emotions and i'm still tripping But I look at myself And I look and I just start busting up laughing like hysterically laughing because I remembered This universe That it's a creation of my mind It's like this is this all that we're experiencing right now is because of this thing between our heads And I created the game so good that I forgot it was a game and all the stress and all the negative emotions that come with the game are part of the game for a reason that's what makes it the game like if it was just super easy coasting all the way through then it wouldn't there's no point to it there's no friction like even the trees need wind to grow like you need that that sandpaper to be able to get you to the next level and i just start busting up laughing like gotcha like like the creator talking to the create gotcha motherfucker you forgot that you created this game and now you remembered and now you can relax a little bit because at the end of the day, we're all going to die, man.

1:40:18Tristan Yoder:I'm going to die. I'm going to die. These guys are all going to be dead. And that's the fun part. If it was all just infinite, there'd be no value to it. So enjoy the game while you got it. I'm straight. Awesome. Where can people find you on socials? At Tristan Social, across the board, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube. We're building up the YouTube. Go ahead and follow us to the YouTube. If you're interested in any of the programs, shoot me a DM. I'm happy to top it up with you. I got a million followers, but I talk to all my people. I love them so much. I do this because I love seeing guys change.

1:40:50People come and hang out with me in Bali, and it's like a pre-Bali era to a post-Bali era.

1:40:55Tristan Yoder:You have the guys that built multi-million dollar businesses, AI businesses, can't say hello to anybody at a coffee shop. And they come and hang out with me afterwards. They're like, hey, hey, hey. It's like that transformation in a person, that's my ticket to heaven. One thing that always makes me sad is to see somebody just not come out of their shell. like they're they're just they have all of this potential and they have this amazing life ahead of them but they're too too afraid to become uncomfortable to put themselves out there and i come across so many of these types of people where you know maybe i speak to them in person or online or whatever it might be i immediately know what the issue is because i see myself in them my younger self when i was that timid guy who didn't have much charisma or confidence and i know it's like it's a it's a long frustrating journey to get to that point that you want to be at but you can get there but you got to take action you can't just continue to hide away from the world you need to get out there and you got to fucking live it yeah the game is winnable and you got to think about what's the alternative yeah it's not good it's not good bro it's not good no thank you bro tristan that was amazing thanks for having me sick

1:42:16Thank you.