At our Witsel’s end | 2026 FIFA World Cup

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3:24that's contentful world class digital experiences built fast, built beautifully create and launch personalised content in an instant across every channel your customers are watching, no chaos no limits, just open field take your shot at contentful.com Axel Witzel, someone said you was dead, Spader through and Maggie Thatcher, are you going to hear me? Welcome to the Football Ramblers, Saturday 11th of July, I'm Pete Donaldson. I'm Luke Moore. And I'm David Cartlidge.

4:08All right, Chavez. All right. How's it going? Feeling good? Pretty good. Good point about Axel Witzel. I mean, I've no idea he's even in the squad. I just thought he was still in between like Russia and China. Yeah. Like clubs there. I just like this milling he's currently without a club I just presumed he'd signed for a different federation yeah I mean it was I mean obviously we'll come on to it but I mean you're fighting for your lives in the World Cup knockout game and you're bringing on 37 year old defensive who's never had any pace by the way so how slow is he that is at like walking level though well yeah I mean let's get to it the football was back on last night I'm not enjoying those days where there's no football to be quite frank I do need it's not what you say during the season I know No, it's a good point, yeah.

4:52He's during the season, you're like, fucking more football again. More football, this again. You're going to enjoy it next season when you haven't got games.

5:00Anyway, back to the World Cup. All players. Back to the World Cup and in the SoFi. What a stadium David Cartl is. We were just reminiscing how lovely that stadium is. You've both been to the SoFi. I've not been to the SoFi. I've been to the SoFi. Lovely. The thing about American stadiums is the food, man. You can have just, You can have everything you ever did. Just the size of a pig. The food of everything. Next to candy floss, next to whatever. Any sporting event in America is... Everything's$50. Everything in America's$50. And I don't know why the export beers are so much more expensive. They'll be brewed in America.

5:37It's just all very confusing. But there's a feeling in... I mean, with the odd exception of the new stadiums that get thrown up in this country every so often. like the food game in football stadiums is lagging way behind and it's a massive hangover from the fact that like football fans were effectively treated like criminals and ne 'er-do-wells for such a long time and it was like you can have a fucking pie and by the way we're going to sell beer but you can't drink it unless you drink it in 10 minutes away from the pitch in the US it's like do what you want bring$300 as long as you're spending lots of money we trust you so many sort of rich sort of famous and frequently handsome people are sat there with glasses of wine, like full beers and stuff.

6:20It really, really grinds my gears if you can't watch a bit of Premier League football, certainly. What do you think about that? It's even down at like South End's level you can't watch, you can't have a beer. Oh, it's lower than that. Yeah, it's South End, National League. Yeah. So I watch Redmond City who are non-league and they've got a brewery next to their pitch and everything, take a beer out and they've got a really good kitchen. You basically get one of those, what's those Chinese boxes called? You know where you get everything in. It's like 10 quid and you get everything. box. Something like that, yeah.

6:45Oh, no, not that fancy, like a munch box, it's all fried stuff. Munchy box. Munch box, yeah, spring rolls and everything and then you can just take it and watch the game and I'm like, that's great. Yeah, because I think there's a load of old lads at Bromley who were gutted that Bromley got promoted and promoted and promoted because it meant they couldn't sit there and do every Saturday and have their beer. Totally get that. But can you, get me a spice bag, I want a spice bag and a pint of lager. What's that, that screen in the SoFi Stadium, it looks absolutely amazing. How does that even work?

7:11Well, I guess they, I mean, it's frequently just used for like information more than it is the actual telly itself. But like, they just split it into sections, don't they, I suppose? It's an incredible piece of engineering. It's an incredible piece of engineering. It's good stuff. Speaking of incredible pieces of engineering, Spain are quite good at football, turns out. Spain beat Belgium at 2-1. I'll just run through what happened in the match. Spain, for the first goal, Fabian Ruiz opened the scoring after reacting quicker to a rebound in the Belgian penalty area. Then Charles de Catteler headed Belgium level on the 41st.

7:44In the second half, Spain, they were in control. Belgium showed flashes. Courtois went off with a leg injury, which was probably the most important thing that happened. But Michel Marino, he just pops up on the 88th minute. Lammons failed to do with a low shot, and he just slots home. The man just knows how to score important goals, Lucky Mo. He does. And this was a story of a technically proficient, but ultimately quite boring team. beating a team who's had like a bit of a rollercoaster really. Yeah. You know. By the way, before I get into that, I found out yesterday that apparently Luis de la Fuentes calls Rodri the computer.

8:19Nice. I like that. Which is a great nickname. Where's his keyboard? Yeah. It's not quite the wardrobe. No, it's not. It's not God rest him. Yeah. I've got a very complicated relationship with Papa Bibliot. All right. Because he was bought with the money used for the totally unnecessary sale of Gary O 'Neill at Portsmouth, who was like a fan favourite and one of my favourite of the players. People who listen to this show regularly know about that. But anyway, the wardrobe is unquestionably a better nickname. But the computer is like, it's a real, almost for me, it's like a 70s Cold War throwback of a nickname.

8:50Yeah. I like it. Not with these RAM prices. But the way Luis de la Fuentes kind of talks about him as being the computer, it's like he doesn't really, he thinks a computer is a really impressive thing. Right, yeah. Everyone's got a computer, Luis. So what? One of those big ones that would take up a whole room back in the 70s. He's called Pedri the calculator. You've got the computer in there The calculator The scientific calculator The little boffins, basically Say you're watching Under Siege With Steven Seagal You've got a geeky guy Who hacks computers Yeah All the computers here Always with glasses And you always get to see The reflection of the monitor In the glasses Yeah, they're never using Windows or Mac They're always some Proprietary system Linux Well, yeah Or something that looks like that Anyway Opera Opera It's a browser Is it?

9:33I don't know what I'm talking about Anyway I just feel that The Belgium Generally I'm not supportive of Belgium, really, as a concept or a nation. As a beer-producing faculty? Yeah, I respect they produce the beer. I respect how passionate about the chocolate and the malt freaks and stuff like that. And I love Bruges. But other than that, I'm not broadly supportive of them. But I do think they were pretty unlucky in this game. I mean, because you go into a big knockout game in the World Cup against a good team, you want the rub of the green. And they've not had the rub of the green because they've had Onana injured and they had Tielemans injured in the warmer.

10:07and then they've had obviously Courtois goes off injured during the game I think Courtois makes an error for that first goal he does yeah for sure but annoyingly it'll be forgotten because Lammans makes a worse error and Lammans is an interesting situation as well because Lammans comes into United and essentially immediately just quiets down the whole discourse around United he's a reckless man everyone just instantly stopped talking about remaining like goalkeepers and then he does that on the biggest stage of all it's a real shame because it felt like that Courtois to Lammans felt like a sort of torch passing didn't it?

10:41A battle passing that Courtois was against philosophically and practically I'm against it. So that's the interesting thing he was apparently injured he was injured he went off but then in the post match and I know he's very upset because he felt like it was the last thing he would do at a World Cup but at that point maybe he thought that they were going through or certainly was going to take it to penalties and he would be heavily involved in those obviously but he did sort of say in the post match that he could have carried on for a little bit longer which I thought was just Courtois has a bit of a dickhead I think he just said he needed help with his kicking that's all he said he got yeah but he can't be taking him back to junior school that's Donaldson in you know Vietnam for over 50s Barry Barry can you take my kicks please I can do them out of my hands but I can't do it off the floor the thing is the worst thing about that is he's only 45 I know he shouldn't be playing in the over 50s anyway let alone he should be on a kick you're allowed an under I think if the over 50s league if you've got an under 40 under 50s ringer and he's going to play in bins you're entitled to expect him to be able to kick well we were so bad the whole team has been disbanded has it and now I'm having to join a younger age group which is you're not having to do that I'm not having to do that how are you talking there's a bidding war for your services 35s and others now oh really absolute nightmare I was going to say I thought you meant younger I was going to say my house has never been worse it's terrible terrible news awful where were we so he wanted he wanted to have people that someone to kick the ball out for him.

12:07Essentially, yeah. One of the fullbacks to come in and just do the long kicks at the diagonals there. That was it. I think that's where he wanted. Well, he could come out and play a bit of football, couldn't he? He could come out of his box and just receive it. I didn't think it'd be a big deal. Most of the teams have a lot of their centre-backs and full-backs taking the goal. Which is now short anyway and building from the back. So they could have just adapted to that though, right? Yeah. That probably was, presumably just wasn't their game plan. Yeah, apparently so, yeah. I think he's talking shit, personally.

12:32All right. I think he was injured and that was the end of it because he went down before. Talking shit to us. And he got treatment and then there was a hydration break and then he went down again. And sometimes I think, you know, the management have to make a decision for the best. I mean, it's almost a bit like pulling a boxer out of a fight, isn't it? You know, the boxer's never going to choose to because he's a warrior but you need to protect him. And if Courtois got a very, even if it's a low grade like hamstring injury or something, he carries on. He could, I mean, the age he is and stuff, it could be serious for him.

13:01And also, and also, if you're the manager you're absolutely helpless because you can't be out on the field you're like well I've got a good keeper I'll just put a good keeper in I mean you don't want hopping around one leg yeah but you don't want well he's been good but you don't want to even if your goalkeeper is your talisman your captain whatever the fuck if he's hopping around one leg and he won't tell you then you've got to take him off you've got to make a decision for him and if he knows that Spain obviously know that exactly but I said that Spain were boring do you think they were boring they're quite a boring team aren't they yeah I thought they were really boring but look the thing is with Spain Belgium's luck here and who they didn't have.

13:33Spain went without Pedri. Pedri's clearly off form, clearly out of fitness. Yamal, returning from a hamstring injury since April. He only started playing football again in July. Nico Williams has barely even touched the ball at the tournament. So they're missing three of their key constructs in this team that has brought them success before in Luis de Lufuentes. So they're playing a little bit different round. They're struggling right now. They're kind of patchwork each game, basically. Yeah. But they are. No, I do agree with your point, though. So Yamal started playing in June, not July, right?

14:00Yeah, that's right. He's a bit of the start of the tournament. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, yeah. So he came back there and there was even just doubts over him. I mean, I think... He faded badly in the game. He played not fully much fit. The hamstring injury he was had was about seven centimetres away from the tendon. And if it had gone into his tendon, he would have missed the World Cup. Right. So it was quite cutting... It was quite cutting very close, basically. I thought Jamal started quite... He started well, but he played exactly like a player who's struggling for fitness. And had a hamstring injury as well.

14:27Yeah, because the first 15, 20 minutes, he was everywhere. probably his best performance at the World Cup though weirdly I thought he was really disappointing I really did I felt more the onus was on kind of Olmo and Bayern to do something and then Bayern faded really badly and Olmo lacked a bit of end product so they struggled and look both goals came from their big centre mid units basically so that's the one thing you would say about Spain they're technically proficient you can't know what you're going to get and they are boring and the worst they can be predictable but the thing I loved about this game was they got their fucking scraps.

15:00They went straight into the penalty area, followed up shots and got their scraps and sometimes, you know, that's what it comes down to. If you've got someone who's got an amazing instinct for a goal like Marino in a key moment, he knows that probably 19 times out of 20, Lamins catches that ball but every single time he'll have been coached and he'll have the instinct to follow it in and the one time he follows it in and he spills it, he'll score. Pound for pound, you've got to look at that Mikel Marino. The way that he, the scores that he's scored in the last two seasons for club and in this case country he is the probably the most important footballer who's ever lived I don't know that is an outrageous ever lived ever lived he's just he's just every time social media every time he comes on you're either trailing or you just need a goal and McAverina comes on and he's just almost always fucking puts it away those two goals he scored obviously he scores the goal against Portugal plays five minutes scores the goal plays four minutes against Belgium scores.

15:57Those are the first two goals he scored for absolutely ages. I mean, he's had problems with valuability. For Spain, yeah. No, he's not scored at all. But he's not been playing though, has he? That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Well, is he the most important footballer of all time or not? Yeah, but I mean pound for pound when he's on the field. That's what I mean. I'm not saying, you can't score if you're not playing. Why are you saying pound for pound? Pound for pound. Like he's a cut of butcher's meat. Dollar for dollar. Speaking of dollar for dollar, Rudy Garcia's contract is up at the end of this tournament.

16:25Should he get a new one, David? No, I don't think he should. Did you like it when he got soaked by the sprinklers? I loved that. Yeah, I really enjoyed that. You didn't like his get-up, did you not? I think he dresses a bit like... He dresses like a corporate American who's been forced to do a corporate away day. So I think he looks like a... Trainers and a baseball cap are like a bad suit. He keeps reminding me of Marty Funkhauser. Yeah, he's exactly like Marty Funkhauser. He is like Funkhauser. Oh, it's the Funkman! Yeah, he's definitely like Marty Funkhauser. No, I don't. And look, there's a bit of a shift there now.

16:56you know De Bruyne is going to go Le Cargo is going to go they've got a ball of the team around Doku exactly you've got Doku you've got Endor you've got a few Fernandos Pardo you know they've got a few young players I think are going to come in as well so a big big transition then I think you go with a new coach as well it's a massive transition for Belgium if you look at the story of their tournament you know they started badly but made it through they had life and death with Senegal probably should have gone home but pulled it out of the fire there was a lot of weirdness around the USA game and following Balogun but they kind of navigated that pretty well then obviously Nane gets a bad one Tielemans gets injured in the warm-up yesterday and they go out in a fairly narrow defeat to Spain in the quarter-final it's not a terrible return Spain do not concede goals you score the goal exactly and that was by the way it was a good goal by the much maligned Charles de Catteler who on this show particularly has taken a lot of fucking strays so good on him it's a really good near post header brilliant forward play by him but as David said the transition for Belgium is absolutely massive now if you look at the list of players they've already lost a few from that kind of quote unquote golden generation you look at the players they're going to lose now I mean Courtois is going to I mean in terms of certainly World Cups I mean possibly you know international tournaments generally you know Courtois is going to go you know Mounier is going to go I know he's not featured that much but he's been a big player I could say he's Kiermine I mean he looks like a good young player as well so to be fair to them but De Bruyne knows obviously he's going to have gone you know Lukaku probably Trossard as well and I know you're saying they've got good young players coming through and I understand that and there are some standouts who have you know been blooded in and kind of got some experience stuff in international tournaments now but there's no guarantee they're going to fill those gaps, I mean there's a big gap these are some of the greatest players to ever play for them so it's a massive turning point for them it's their golden generation and look the best they achieve is World Cup semi-final which is a good achievement third place though, they've got to their K30 so they've done really well and it is, it's difficult to come after that type of generation and lots of teams experience look their opponents Spain they've had experience as well they went through a period where they lost Xavi Iniesta Piquet Ramos they lost a lot of very good players and had to look at things and you know and they'd probably say look we're not of that level but we're going to try and continue it to a good level still and that's where it's at in Belgium but I wouldn't be completely lost but I mean Axel Wittell's still going to be around right?

19:15Yeah absolutely he's not going anywhere he picked up his 139th cap he'll make 150 won't he? it's an amazing return I mean, I think there was... Second on the appearance list behind Jan Vertonghen as well. He had obviously a very, very good career. Yeah, Vertonghen was amazing. I think Vitzel was really good at one point. I rated him. He was really good. He made, did he, from memory, he made like quite a weird move to go, to leave Europe at quite a key part. I know he's come back and he's been at Dortmund and Girona and whatever, but he made a weird move to go away from Europe at a key point in his career, didn't he?

19:47For loads of money. Yeah, exactly. I mean, he's done Zenit. I think he did. Did he go to China? I was going to say he did China as well so he's been around he copped that money when it was about basically wherever he could smell a bug he could run after it but if you're going to be super cynical about it he went to Zenit when they were probably paying big money then the Russian guys and it was a good team that Zenit team was a good team there was a few there he went to Tianjin Kuanjian oh yeah I mean back in the golden era of that for a year the Tianjin lads then who've got millions who've got millions then back at Dortmund wasn't he at Dortmund for a few years and then let's go Madrid and stuff did India not find that India had a bit of cash that was probably a generation before him I suppose I don't think he's going to India at like 27 I was going to say what's his button average don't be an agent don't be an agent they had loads of money all Liverpool boys weren't they Robbie Fowler went there he's like 38 for a year money money money give us it I think it might have even been eight a side don't have a go at the Carola eight-a-side blasters.

20:52Yeah, yeah. I mean... So Vince is going to go IPL next, yeah? Is that what you're saying? Maybe, potentially. Turn his arm over. Well, Spain have made it to the semifinals of the World Cup for just the second time ever. They're going to be, of course, playing France in Dallas on Tuesday. That'll be a lovely bash. It is. It's going to be an interesting one. One team we like to score and the team we don't like to let any in. It's going to be an interesting one. Look, I think Spain to get around this game, what they did against Belgium is not going to be enough. They're going to need... Jamal to be back on top form they're going to need maybe Nico Williams to be back amongst it and I think the most important player in the team is Pedri I really do he runs everything in that team and if he's off it then Spain are off it I think and he's going to be the key man and I think I still maintain that France midfield is there to be to be you know to be imposed upon basically and Rodri and Pedri could do that their attack amazing the defensively they're looking solid brilliant goalkeeper as well there's a few issues France midfield I don't know it doesn't completely like convince me that it's that strong it needs to have a good group of opponents against it it feels like you're trying to think of reasons why France aren't easily going to win the World Cup I'm trying I think France are a much better team ultimately a much better team yeah I do I do I think we're expecting things of Spain when in actual fact they've not been up against much really and they are dull and what I'd be really interested in seeing actually in this game is France to score really early.

22:22And then you go, okay, right, what is Spain actually going to do? But surely you want Spain to score early because then you want to say, I want to see France up against it a little bit or what they're like with a bit of adversity. Well, I suppose maybe because if France score early and Spain just can't respond then it'll be boring as fuck, I guess. Yeah, that's a fair point. Interestingly on your point, do you think England are much better than Spain as well? I don't think England are much better than Spain but I think I would be far, I mean, the way I would qualify it would be by saying I'd be much less worried about England playing Spain and they would France.

22:49Okay. But I think Spain and France are probably both better than England. I think they're the two teams that are better than England. But I think France are better than Spain. I do. And I think if you look at the better markets ahead of the game, France will be favourites. There's a good reason for that. But then maybe you could also argue you've got to pick your poison here. You could also argue that Spain are kind of growing into the tournament. They've only considered one goal. It's been boring, you know, but sometimes stuff is boring and that'll be how they do it. But I think France are better.

23:17I don't think Belgium like I said they've had a weird tournament they're quite inconsistent they've got some good players as I said yesterday you know I felt like the best chance they had they had to start a docker which of course they did and the best chance they had was someone producing a moment or two and then they kept it tight and they just weren't able to do that and the reason they weren't able to do that actually is because of two goalkeeping errors Spain weren't brilliant or anything as you've already said so I think I just feel like the way the whole pack in the World Cup is settling.

23:47You've got the teams who are very happy to be there, a couple of dark horses, some good teams, and then France. That's the way I see it. Okay, fair. In the good teams, I would say England, Spain, Argentina, you know, they're all pretty good, you know, and then France would stand out. I just think they are. They've not been troubled really at all, have they? No. Yeah, and that's my point. That's kind of like, I want to see them troubled. I want to see them up against it and everything. Spain aren't going to get physical, though, are they? Which is what they need. They need a good roughing up. got some big lads in there got the computer got the computer maybe put a virus in the France well just just gets too excited by computers he's really voodooed in my graphical processing unit viruses Norwegian sides let's talk about Roberto Martinez do we have to yes we do Roberto Martinez's Portugal replacement has been named Joshua Jesus has signed a four year contract 71 year old Portuguese was Al Nasser head coach last season winning the Saudi Pro bad news for those of us who hoped Cristiano Ronaldo was finally going to retire when he said Jesus said that winning Ronaldo the league was the sole reason he took the Al Nasser job Ronaldo definitely picked that fucking guy for those who aren't for those who think that Ronaldo should just get out the fucking way it's not a great piece of news is it no no is it no definitely not he's clearly going to continue as part of the he's going to plead Ronaldo and that will please Ronaldo.

25:19It's very much Donald Trump having another loyalist to his cabinet. That's what it feels like to me. So, I mean, he's been playing golf with Harry Kane. I saw that. I saw that. Kane kept that quiet, didn't he? He did, yeah. I've not heard any, like you heard a couple of stories about it and I'm like, why has it not been reported a lot more? He absolutely flat batted it. He was like, yeah, yeah, we did play like 18 months ago. He was quite good. That was it. He's only admitted it 18 months later. Cairn's just one of those but you know like Ben White and people say oh Ben White might be thinking that or whatever I think Cairn's just so apolitical he just won't care he's like I don't know what's going on Charlie made me do it it's probably Tom Brady that made him do it to be fair he's good friends with Tom Brady and Brady loves all that stuff so anyway I'm not really sure what opinion I'm supposed to have on that a golf man and a Trump supporter as well I'm shitting fair enough who better to comment on it he golfs in his Trump hat Yeah, yeah, yeah.

26:15Shit at golf, like Trump. Make your golf better. I like it. I've said before, Trump's politics are a bit liberal for my taste. You like the craziness of Kash Patel, don't you? It's just a bit wet blanket for me. Come on, get off the fence, Donald. All right, well, can we go after this? England face a swamp ass warning down in Miami.

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27:55Just get out there and go. This summer at Best Western, get 1 ,000 bonus points and a chance to win 250 ,000 bonus points. Life's a trip. Make the most of it at BestWestern.com. No additional purchase necessary for sweeps. See bonus points, TNCs, and sweeps rules for details. Milo's money days are here, and we're making it rain for rewards members. For the first time ever, when you make a purchase of$200 or more through July 12th, you'll get up to$30 back in extra MyLowes money. Not a member yet? Join for free today because members get more at Lowe's. MyLowes money award varies based on status.

28:37Members in gold get 30, silver get 20, and bronze get 10. MyLowes money valid for 30 days. Restrictions and more terms at lowes.com slash MyLowesMoneyDays. There are moments that reveal who we are and who we're meant to become. For those born to lead, such moments call for a vehicle of equal distinction. Dynamic by design, uncompromising in execution, the Range Rover Sport was engineered for those rare individuals who demand the world and possess the conviction to claim it. When your time to lead arrives, you need a vehicle that rises to meet it. The Range Rover Sport. Exclusive offers available now.

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29:19Good morning, Glenn! Can you tell us something your mum doesn't know?

29:28Welcome back to the Football Ramble. Always a pleasure to hear that guy. Always a pleasure. Was that Euro 2024 or was it before that? I feel like it was before that. I think it was before, yeah. He's been in my heart for such a long time. I feel like I've known him forever. You guys have been obsessed with it for years, so it must have been before that. It's the inevitability, as I always say, it's the inevitability of him doing it again. It makes me laugh every time. Yeah. And the guy's a bit annoyed. Didn't make you laugh then, did it? No, didn't. You've been jaded by it. No, exactly. Before we get on to England, gentlemen, today is a very special anniversary.

29:57It is 60 years... Since you first ejaculated playing HeroQuest. 60 years to the day... Sponsored. Sorry, icons. But you know what you've got yourself in for. You know what show you're on, sunshine. It is 60 years to the day since England kicked off the 1966 World Cup. Oh, nice. It was against Uruguay. It was. At Wembley. Marcelo Bielsa was manager. It was a ball draw. Goal a straw. But to mark this very special occasion, we've partnered up with our friends at icons.com, the home of the world's best football memorabilia. Together, we are giving away an unmissable prize. You can win an England 1966 jersey signed by nine of the World Cup winning squad.

30:40That is genuinely a really good prize. That is the sort of prize that impresses every generation of football fan. I think there's so many generations in my family that would be impressed by that yeah huge absolutely huge 1966 World Cup jersey at summer 9 of our beautiful boys head on over to our Instagram page at Football Ramble like the post tag a mate and follow us like the post tag a mate and follow us that's all you need to do to have a chance to win but you do have to be quick because entries close when England kick off against Norway that's 10 o 'clock tonight It's 10 o 'clock tonight. So get over to at Football Rumble Instagram right now and get involved.

31:19A very good luck to you. Also, speaking of England in that World Cup, what was the score when England pin Norway in a friendly in June 1966? So they played the winner friendly before the World Cup. It was a big win for England, wasn't it? It was. It was 6-1. Would we take that tonight? If we were offered that now, would we take it? I think I probably would. Yeah, but would you not... But the one would be Erling Haaland scoring past Danburn. He scores first like Sam Marino did against England that time. Well, as I mentioned before, some players are computers. But a lot of the, let me do the virus joke again.

31:55I'm sorry. But the England and Norway squads have got viruses. Both of them got a virus. Well, I think, there's rumours that Declan Rice had come down with something tummy based, but maybe not. Something tummy based. I'm speculating. I'm editorialising. This is a really big section of the show for you because Marcus isn't here. I know. you've got to really not just pick us up and drag us along but you've got to bring all the listeners and all the viewers along with you being excited about the game tonight you've got to help me are you happy of how it started yeah I think so okay good I think I've held up my end of the bargain good okay it's just like Mad Awaker coming in for a sack with a thrilling thrilling cut inside with an icons.com really beautiful before coming down with a virus no way versus England tonight at 10 o 'clock Look, there's rumours, unfortunately, that there may be some delays due to some weather-based activity, but it's always raining.

32:50In Miami in July? No, I'm not having it. No, I'm not having it. Pedential stops could delay, but we'll find out, no doubt, as we get closer and closer. But it has to be said, this is probably one of the first weather-based tests for England. I know it rained at the Azteca, but the other matches have mainly been in, you know, pretty decent conditions with the Eguildare condition. This is going to be stuffy. This is going to be quite simply dangerous for athletes. this is going to be quite simply this is going to be perilous for life quite simply the kind of temperature and humidity that many different sporting confederations around the world say you should not be participating in but we're going to do it anyway I'm going to use the word spores the words from Barry from EastEnders we're going to do it anyway we're going to do it anyway we're going to do it anyway this is going to be apparently about 34 degrees Celsius what's the real feel TM the real feel is apparently going to be over 40 and for our American cousins I mean that's going to be 34 I think is what about I'm quite good at this normally 34, I think, is about 94, I say.

33:47Can you check that? 93. 93, okay. So that's fucking hot and fucking humid. And my experience of that part of the world is that there are storms regularly, but they do pass through quite quickly. So my hot take as someone who has no meteorology qualifications whatsoever would be it's going to be, if there's a storm, it'll be half an hour and it'll pass through. You know what it's like around there, right? In Florida, that's what it's like, isn't it? But if there's a storm, there's going to be still about an hour delay. Because there's protocols. Yeah, because there's protocols. That's the only thing.

34:19So if the storm does come through, it's a bit of a problem. But the humidity is horrible in that part of America. It's really tough. Did you see the weatherman, the Florida-based meteorologist, they call him out there, isn't it? I bet he's a character. You've already saw me, a Florida-based meteorologist. Matt Devitt. Matt Devitt on X. He looks like a Floridian Ryan Reynolds. Yeah, I'd have that. Yeah, he's a weatherman in Florida. he's a weatherman a weatherman a weather person and he was on X great stuff on X he issued his first ever swamp ass warning which is apparently something he does every year but he posted a graphic of Florida and the feels like temperatures across the state along with an image of a cartoon alligator with a sweaty bum it was absolutely horrific he didn't need to AI the alligator with such a big bum I mean Pete he didn't need to do any of it no he didn't do any of it what do you mean he didn't need to there was already an alligator with a sweaty bum, like an actual real one.

35:14Oh, well, maybe. I don't know. Maybe they're all just general. Maybe they're always, you know, generally. I just don't, he didn't need to be packing in his, I don't know why the alligator's wearing shorts, sweaty shorts at that. Has it got you feeling confused? It's got me thinking about things that I will need to explore later on the internet. So he's also claiming that just west of Miami, it will be 114 degrees Fahrenheit, which is 45 degrees Celsius. Yeah. So the hydration breaks are going to be needed. I don't want to be here anyone complaining about hydration breaks tonight because our brave boys are going to need them it's all hydration isn't it it's so damp down there I'm still going to complain yeah yeah fair enough I'm allowed more we need salt we need a salt break but on the game itself right this is this is there's a few things taken to account for England one will be a theme that regular England fans will be familiar with which is who the fuck is going to play right back it'll probably be Jed Spence right we've got to take into account there are several England players on bookings Declan Rice, Mark Gay, Nick O 'Reilly and Drew Belliam and a partridge in a pear tree they would all miss the semi-final if booked in this game so that's going to be at the back of their heads but my top take hot take sorry is that we shouldn't worry about that you can't be fucking you can't be projecting forward can you Declan Rice got booked very early in the last match first minute and he was great if you pick up a book in you pick up a book in we worry about that when it comes there's a squad there for the reason exactly win the game bring Axel Witzel on if you need to exactly yeah gotta go for it don't worry about things like that and look I think a couple of those players you've named as well they won't they'll just go all out and they'll play it like they're not even on that book and so they should as well somebody can come in and do a job as well yeah and I think if you look at the the team that he's probably going to play is ultimately presuming that he's happy with the fitness of Rice he's going to play Spence Konza Gaye O 'Reilly Rice Anderson Saka Bellingham Gordon and Kane yes I think it would Jordan Pickford in goal and that's the right team to play and if you think of the Norwegian weapons they've got a good goalkeeper they've got a good striker and they've got two fullbacks who love to get forward and love to cross the ball in right is that fair?

37:33We're up Martin Erlegaard Erlegaard can get in those pockets and cause problems but I think England are pretty famous last words this is will be equal to Martin Odegaard these are the pitfalls of doing this type of show before a game I personally believe that England should better deal with Martin Odegaard there's the team talk done it is my considered opinion if they are using me from the football ramble as part of their team talk we are definitely going to win don't worry about that but also what do you make of Noosa because I think he's flattered to deceive in the last game I think he did as well his end product wasn't great early stage I thought he was quite exciting and it looked like he could change it up, basically.

38:10But I think he could still be a problem against these fullbacks. They play some nice triangles at times and have been right the way through this tournament. They look very, very tidy in very small spaces, which upsets me. But, like you said, we should be able to beat this team. So you think the key flashpoints will be in the fullback areas for England again? I really do. Is he going to be tempted to play Dan Byrne? No, no, no. I think he'll play Colter and Gay, as I said. Is it fair to say that Dan Byrne will probably be introduced earlier than you think simply because of his history with Haaland?

38:43No, I don't see this. Because Haaland has played Newcastle when Dan Byrne's played and he's managed one goal against them in like 12 fixtures, right? And the only goal he scored was when Dan Byrne was off the field. Is that true? That is true. Is that actually true? Dan Byrne is, has... He's the kryptonite. He's a very physical, big presence that occupies Haaland and he just follows him around. and I'm just saying that it's worked a lot of times against Manchester City in the past. Are you saying the real rivalry is Haaland and Dan Byrne? It's Haaland and Gabriel. Is that what you're telling me?

39:16You'll never ever beat Dan Byrne. It's Godzilla versus King Kong and we're all just watching. Clip him singing the Dan Byrne song. We're all just watching. So to me it's Conzer and Gay at the back but there's been a lot of discourse saying that Byrne should play. I mean Peter's being a bit churlish there but a lot of people are saying it. Me? I'll tell you. disagree if we need to get him in the trenches later on bring him on but I don't think that's how it all sounds he'll be roasted if he starts down exactly I'm not really convinced by the centre back pairing as things stand but no I think he's for somebody to come on later on it's good that Pickford has started to find a bit of form because he looked a little bit shaky he looked a little bit willing to a little bit needy a little bit willing to sort of try and impose himself on the game first couple of matches but he's just looked a lot less shaky as we've gone deeper at the tournament he's not being a shouty as well I think he's been quite reserved I think he's finding a bit of calmness we're trying to find maybe playing at elevation probably helps because he can't breathe I think he Pickford's quiet this week yeah he's hyperventilating I think he breaks Peter Shilton's record for World Cup appearances tonight as well if I'm right oh that's great stuff because I fucking hate Peter Shilton likewise Likewise, little shit.

40:34Do you know what I mean? I do like Pickford and you should get more love because you've got to remember there was some bad years for England with goalkeepers and what we went through with different ones. I heard an absolutely outrageous story about Peter Shitton in World Cup 90 where someone was reporting that Bobby Robson said that the two other keepers that England had, who I'm going to say were Dave Besson and Chris Woods. Bobby Robson said you can play a half each in the third place playoff because you don't feature and you've been such great lads around the team and stuff. And Peter Shitton and apparently massively kicked off and said, no, I want my 125th cap.

41:05So he played. That's incredible. And I think from memory, he gave away a fucking terrible penalty in that game as well. Or it wasn't a penalty because Italy scored anyway. He did something really bad. He pulled someone down and it was a terrible piece of goalkeeping. But anyway, Peter Schitt was also clearly a fucking dick. You can see he's a dick. So anyway, bring it back to the game itself. Icons.com. He wasn't playing 66. That's nothing to do with a break for you. Next week, it'll be a Peter Shunshan show, won't it? No, it won't. We've been hoisted by our own Luma. I'll veto it. You can be any other player.

41:40You can't be sure. But I don't know if this is of interest or not, but I was reading that Norway, in terms of shots per game in this World Cup, are 34th. They shoot, on average, far less than other, what you'd call kind of top teams. Certainly far less than the other teams in the quarterfinals, which is kind of interesting. That's why Haaland was so surprised, when he trickled that shot over the line he was like I wonder how many of those shots are Harland that would be interesting as well but ultimately England have got a different challenge because they've got to manage the conditions they've got to manage the occasion of course as you always have to and you've also got to I've got a little niggling thing in the back of my mind and I've said this to Marcus and he can't disagree with me and that's fair enough but I feel a bit like they need to combat the idea that it will be a bit after the Lord Mayor show because of the Mexico heroics they were heroics I mean that was one of the most significant games England have played for many many years and they've got to lift themselves again in really difficult conditions against a really physical team.

42:35And let's not forget that Mexico, all things being equal, are not on the same level as England, but the occasion and the stadium brought it up. The environment. Yeah, but they've got to lift themselves again in really tough conditions against a really physical team who have got some really seasoned Premier League operators. So it will be interesting to see how that goes. And I would love to see them settle in really early and kind of put to bed any fears that people might have, because I won't be the only one with those fears, of that that wasn't the kind of the summit of the entire summer because of how good it was against Mexico.

43:11Do it for little Jordy Henderson's broken arm is what I'm saying. Do it for a marriage arm. But what do you think about those points? No, I totally agree. And I'll tell you what, I don't think the game's going to have the chaos of the Mexico game. I think this is going to be... I know the Mexico game was torturing places because it was just carnage. It was all over the place. It was uncontrollable, wasn't it? Exactly. I think there's going to be a lot of control in this game. I think it's going to be kind of prolonged torture. I think there's going to be really intense periods of just England trying to work the ball and work the way through.

43:39And Norway really, really frustrating England. England's going to have to have a lot of persistence to try and break them down. So I think it's going to be that type of game. Is that how you think Norway will set up to frustrate England and try and catch them? I really do. I really do. And they'll just look to play those quick breaks and just get one cross into Haaland. I can't see Norway At any point really saying Right we're going to try and dominate possession here I think they're going to be happy to Let England have the ball And try and frustrate them and pick them off on the break Like I said that one cross That one potential opportunity That one V1 they can create with Haaland Up against Guy or Konza I think that's what they're going to play for And I do feel Norway is still I know we've talked a lot about England's full backs I think Norway's full backs Are particularly vulnerable especially behind Ryerson who I do really like but I've noticed a few things there with Norway where they do leave space in behind and I just want They like to go forward They really really do and I just think there's gaps in there behind and England have got to create a lot more 2v1 situations in behind full backs I've noticed a lot of the time the wingers are very isolated and you've got maybe 15, 20 yards between the winger and the next player and they're looking for a passing outlet and it's not there for England so I want to see some of that 2v1 in wide areas So if Wolfe in particular for Norway leaves space, would you definitely still play Saka then?

44:59Yeah, absolutely. I think Saka's level is just so much higher than Maduweke who would play there. That's the thing, the drop-off. When you take Saka out of the team and put Maduweke in, I just think you lose so, so much. And I know Saka's played a lot of football. I know he's perhaps not at his very best, but it's still Saka for me and I know what he can produce. Do you guys think there's any... So I sometimes feel these conversations these points that people make about players who share clubs and stuff are a bit trite but do you think there's any merit at all in the fact that Gailly will know a lot about Haaland or do you think any decent centre-back worth their salt has seen Haaland play so much they'll know what he's all about and they just can't stop him anyway That's the thing everybody knows everybody's tried different strategies against Haaland some people's put two on him some people's tried to stay very tight on him some people some people's tried to do like zonal marking against him keep watching him screen him so it's going to be interesting to see which way they face I think every centre-back knows.

45:52It's just how you turn up on that day and how you rise, how confident you are about it, basically. My feeling is that Harlan is basically inevitable. I mean, the way he dinner-moneyed Gabriel and the fact that he only needed, I mean, obviously, the second goal he scores, he's just like, well, I'm just going to fucking score. If you're going to let me, give me that space, I'm just going to pass it into the corner. But the first goal, he is a heartbreaker for Brazil, right? Yeah. And Harlan has scored in, I think, 460 Norway games in a row now, right? maybe 461 you might have to check that but ultimately he always scores so England maybe just and they're not going to do this because they're not going to be the fetus about it but as fans we might have to just make our peace with the fact that Haaland's going to score a goal and we just have to make sure that England try and make sure England score more I just think Gay and Conce are really going to have to look within themselves and bring out something more I always think when Haaland but they can't deal with Haaland physically the physicality of him it's not possible for them that's what I'm saying they have to try and dig deep and find something else and trying and I know it's Haaland but trying Alphard But the games where he has been controlled The other players You can clearly see They've got their chest puffed out They've just said Right I'm up for this challenge I can take it Sometimes you can just kind of take your soul I was looking at Gabriel's Gabriel's face sometimes And you're kind of like My god he looks like Like a lost little lamb Yeah yeah And you can't let Harlan see that about you Otherwise he'll just Eat you for dinner He used to hear He's from life You'll never ever beat Dan Byrne He's from black He's not going to play though, is he?

47:22We just said that He'll play We can still sing He can still sing? Let him come on second half I think it's important to remember that back in January Erling Haaland played 45 minutes against Exeter City and didn't score and they won they won 10-1 and he didn't score There we go So, good thinking about that

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49:48Well, before we move on, Norway undertook an espying measures for their training session on Wednesday, covering up the press room windows and blocking media from observing training after the first 15 minutes. What were they working on in the 16th minute, David Cartlidge? Passing the ball to Haaland. There's not really much else. Maybe it's literally like, you've seen 15 minutes this, I mean, it's going to be more of the same, really. There's no point sticking around. Honestly, we have been frequently watchable in this tournament do yourself a favour don't watch more than 15 minutes and now we're going to do crosses into Harlem from the other side all 26 squad members trained despite reports of illness in the camp fucking get them all together get them kissing so I also heard start spraying fucking Spanish fly on them so they just start touching each other more love it let's spread let's be super spreaders I also heard from the well respected and estimable inestimable I don't know what that word means but I think inestimable was the one I'm going for Henry Winter Indefatigable Hank Top man that Rhys James Rhys James was involved yesterday right okay yes yeah yeah yeah the only person that wasn't involved for England was Jordan Henderson who's sadly lost his arm so sadly no longer he lost his arm he will be unable to pick up the World Cup because he was screaming honestly Jordan Henderson with his bad arm World Cup and ahhh Help!

51:10So, although it'll probably be too early, and maybe if we can look ahead to a semi-final, which we shouldn't do because we can't look past Norway, maybe Rhys James is more likely to feature in a semi-final if England get there. But he was training again yesterday. So we can have yellow cards all around our fullbacks. Maybe it won't need to be spent. So maybe Rhys James can come in for the last half an hour or whatever. Because I just think at his very best, Rhys James is the best of all of them. I totally agree. But the problem is, I mean, my first game, I thought he just didn't look like himself.

51:37and he was meant to be fit then. And I was just like, oh, I think he's chronically injured. I think he's always managing something. Which is such a shame. Well, he's a lovely footballer. He really, really is. I have so much time for him. So it's a shame he's not fit more. All right. Well, a couple of things before we shuffle off and, you know, get our kind of pre-match preparation sorted out, get the old air fryer going. Yeah. You need a poo, don't you? What? I do all my poos in the middle of the night. Speaking, speaking, it's like, where God can't see me.

52:10slightly related news a few people did ask me on Instagram would you consider rather than just doing battered sausages on Friday what would you do for special events like for example the game tonight? Oh well I have an extra one conducting an orchestra with your battered sausage well I would have to talk to the person who's providing my antacids to be honest I'd have to consult my health team it's like a pre-match kind of it's like making cut it's like cutting weight before a fight I've got to talk to people who provide my omeprazole, my inhibitors. Anyway, let's get you an email. Luke, do you want to read this email from Chris?

52:45Come on, can't you be bothered? Can't be bothered. Okay, fine. I thought you were going to read it because it's about My Chemical Romance and you two both love My Chemical Romance. Anyway, it's from Chris. Hello to you, Chris. He says, hi, lads. Months back, my partner told me she wanted to go see My Chemical Romance this summer, who, of course, are doing a kind of residency at Wembley Stadium at the moment, aren't they? Little did I know it would coincide with England's quarterfinal. The gig is at Wembley and set to finish around 10.30pm with the match kicking off at 10 o 'clock. Our hotel is in Spitalfields and it's always a nightmare getting to the tube station when leaving Wembley.

53:13I should also mention that my partner isn't really interested in football and nor other friends coming with us to the gig. So what am I to do? Should I try to ignore any noise indicating what's happening on the commute? I mean, that will be impossible. Try to persuade them to head to a local bar showing the game or do I try to get updates on the commute from people getting on the tube and enjoy the inevitable rowdiness along the way? Thanks in advance. Dr. Chris. He says, P.S. I managed to get this blackout score draw England shirt as I thought it fit both the emo themes of the concert and the wider football atmosphere.

53:41It's a really good shirt, that. My take is just simply this. Now, I'm speaking as someone who can take or leave my chemical romance, not particularly bothered either way. I would probably, are they going to come on probably, what, about nine? Are they going to come on at nine? When we stadium curfews probably 10.30? Not on a Saturday. He said 10.30 there. Then we say it's going to finish around 10.30. It's a really tough one. I looked at the set list for you so you don't have to You're not going to get a service on your phone either You can't watch any phone And I would not be leaving There's a lot of big songs in that encore Oh really?

54:13So get yourself get involved You're going to have to leave You're going to have to leave when it finishes Could you do There's some horrible sports bars near Wembley I was going to say just go on one of them Just go on one of those Those kind of like aluminium Miss the first half hour get right by the exit Miss the first half hour and then bomb it down I think you've got two options Either go to a bar or you just go and get some tins from a shop and then go and watch it on your phone with your missus on a nice little place. She's an interesting person. She does not want to be sitting on the curb in Wembley for two hours with tins watching a sport she hates.

54:43Oh, right, okay. Are you still married? I'm okay, I promise. I wondered why I never saw them again. I would say, is it possible, do you think, as a little thought experiment, is it possible to, as soon as, I mean, this is quite antisocial, but it's a special event. you get to the exit, ready for the gig to finish. So you can bomb off straight away. You stick your headphones in, you play some of your favorite music. Maybe you play some more My Chemical Romance. Or you put a playlist on for like an hour. You bury your face in your phone to read some other news or you read a book or something. And you wait till you get back to your hotel.

55:23You load up an iPlayer and you watch it with your phone on Do Not Disturb for two hours. Yeah, you just need blinkers, like a hat, like... It's like you've been renditioned, wouldn't it? Yeah. It's like how they get people who do the mass singer in. Or somebody for a court appearance. Or how they take people under suspicion by the CIA to Syria. Exactly. Yeah, exactly. I sometimes do it with boxing and UFC. Like, I'll avoid... But it's easy. It's not such a big event. You're not around a thousand people. It's very difficult. This is super, super difficult to do. I just quite simply would not be attending the gigs.

55:53Please. I totally agree. They're not even top tier emo. Okay. So who... What's your top tier emo? What emo artist would make you miss an England game? Funeral for a friend? Yeah but they're like More of like a Post hardcore Yeah they are But they're your favourite band No they're not You just said they were No I didn't I said they're the best Welsh band Oh sorry Because you said You're going to see Superfoot Animals Don't Don't You said emo Welsh band Don't Shut the fuck up Or I'll tell the story He's dead now They get the money He's made to get the money Best emo band of all time Or Sonny Day Real Estate Sonny Day Real Estate Okay fine Best emo band of all time Terrible Live Take It Back Sunday Oh I love Take It Back Sunday Best hardcore slash post hardcore band of all time At the driving I'd agree They had very short careers though At the driving They're my Glassjaw Don't need to carry on when you've done that Glassjaw Yeah, Glassjaw Glassjaw, love a bit of that Right You've just done yourself out of any more shows on the Ramble Oh, why?

56:48Did he get cancelled? I don't know Everybody's been cancelled They all are Can't watch fucking brand new They're all fucking problems Yeah Anyway Says this man Says this man I'm going to round out the show with some exclusive news. Oh, okay. Yeah, I heard this. So there's something in the running order saying that Pete's rumour. Pete's rumour. I'm excited. I'm saying it's a rumour. It's not a rumour. It's happening. We don't do a lot of exclusive news on the show. Because we've got no contacts? Because you've got no contacts. The only contacts we've got are the ones with your eyes. Exactly. I heard this on the Great Vine.

57:25I'm really sorry to start our new kind of Wicked Whispers kind of rumour mill sort of section in this manner. But Amazon are soon, sooner than you need it to be, I think, are going to be doing a docuseries about Michael Owen and his family.

58:06as follows experiences at manor house stables and life after football

58:14it's called the owens

58:34End the show. Come on, England. Come on, England.

58:47The Football Ramble is a Stack Production and part of the Acast Creator Network.

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