Barry Scott, someone said you was dead

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1:27Download the free app today and make the most of your summer with AllTrails. This episode is sponsored by Michaels, your destination for all things birthday parties. We just had Lucky's first birthday, and it was so great to be able to go into Michaels and get everything. Of course, I knew they had craft supplies there, but I didn't realize how expansive their party supplies were. And Michael's really is where you can go to get everything for a party, whether you're planning a kid's birthday or even an adult celebration. They've got over 4 ,500 party supplies, more than 60 different themes, and prices starting at just 99 cents.

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3:59This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Hi, this is Paige from Giggly Squad, and today's episode is brought to you by McDonald's. Honestly, Caesar sauce and a Diet Coke at McDonald's might be the perfect girl dinner. And McCrispy strips dipped in Caesar sauce? No notes. Right now at participating McDonald's, the$2.99 Caesar snack wrap is making me rethink my entire go-to order. Caesar sauce is at participating McDonald's for a limited time, so go try it before it's gone. Prices and participation may vary. I shouted Tony Cotty's name in my sleep last night.

4:37True story. Welcome to the Football Ramble. It's Monday, 27th of July. I am Pete Donaldson. I'm Luke Moore. And I'm the Dishina Hantaraja. Tony Cotty!

4:58That's what you get when you drink a glass of wine before bed. A single... You've podcasted worse? I've podcasted worse. I've shouted Tony Cotty's name in my sleep. Yeah. For some reason. That's the one thing they edited out the Stephen Bartlett interview. The fact that he repeatedly shouted after Tony Totti. We can't use that. Three days before I had a dream of a Pep Guardiola, who for some reason I was just hanging out with, and he was basically talking his, not in real life, but in my dream, was talking his trans daughter through coming out, basically. It was a very interesting and emotional time in my dream.

5:31Figures for your subconscious. I don't know what that was all about. So he's doing all that, and you're there just watching? I'm just there helping him helping everyone out really it's very strange you can't say that what is going on that's not the right language Tony Cotty obviously famously remembers every single one of his goals you know that fact about him I do know that is that right he's got a lot and he did and he claims a photographic memory I've been able to remember every single one of his goals I don't know if anyone's tested him on it but maybe they should that'll be interesting content he's better than Pete's Film Club anyway he he was famously shot in that film with De Bautista wasn't he he was speaking of film club speaking of film we covered it did we cover it I can't remember yeah we did we did Batista I'm not going to watch that actually marching powder was it marching powder it wasn't marching powder it was called saying it was Dave Batista at the West Ham up to Park Stadium was it London Stadium or up to Park no it was up to Park it was the last thing that was kind of done at up to Park basically they just laid waste to it final score they laid waste to it with fireworks and stuff and Dave Batista with his big man jeans running around yeah it was bizarre It was bizarre.

6:35It was bizarre. So Final Score was released the same year that the film that we've just watched has been released. There we go. Well, it is silly season. What a year for movies. As you can probably tell from the intro to this show, which means we're going to kick off the show with the biggest news of the summer. Pete's Film Club is back. Something that we were forced to do. You paused there as if you wanted an innovation. Can you put the round of applause in there, please? Well, the next line here says, I know many of you have been waiting years for this. Have we? Yeah. Well, we did it in COVID because there was no football to talk about.

7:06And now it's back. In the one week in which football is not taking place. But the only good thing about Peach Film Club, the first time around. All right. This is in the middle of a cell. Allow me. I think you'll agree. Okay. Was how pissed off Marcus got. Correct. Marcus isn't even here this week. Exactly. So we're easing ourselves in. There's not even any benefit to it. We're easing ourselves in with the return of Film Club. We're going to kick things off with a 2018 film called The Keeper. It's part war movie. It's part football film. there's some mild anti-German sentiment, which we're allowed to do in the World Cup.

7:38Kick them while they're down. What is there not to love? So make sure you go and watch The Keeper before Thursday when the show comes out. It's easy to find on Amazon Prime or on Torrent. Well, hang on a second. Hang on, maybe we'll do this on Thursday. But the Torrent option here, Pete, hasn't proven itself to be that successful with you, has it? Because you first of all sent us a link to the exactly wrong movie, and then you set it as a link to a torrent to the movie which was in German with no subtitles. Yeah, there was no subtitles. Nobody had found those subtitles and connected it. And also you didn't have VLC on your laptop which is absolutely shocking.

8:13I didn't even know what that was. Jesus Christ, guys. I did it on Amazon Prime, basically. Also, not quite so easy to find because there is a horror film released in 2025 of the same name, The Keeper. Are you going to turn up to Pete's Film Club reviewing that? I'm just saying that when you talked about the lack of sleep you were having, I had similar from watching this film. Bert Troutman's had an interesting life, hasn't he? When his neck was all funny, that's crazy. Bert Troutman's got fangs. I remember that. Well, yes, it is silly season, as we said, there's precious little football to talk about, but plenty of transfer news, gentlemen.

8:51Plenty of transfer news. It's what football's about, though, isn't it? It is. It is. It's pretty much what kind of runs the little sort of village ecosystem that exists in social media, on YouTube and stuff like that. There's loads of people on social media who prefer transfers to football. Oh, completely agree with that. Completely agree with that. David Ornstein, Bruce Springsteen, Steen, little Steen of me, God's Dave the Steen, Sexmerstein, Bontorunstein, has been reporting that Arsenal are exploring a move to sign Vinicius Junior from Real Madrid. This is proper meat, innit? This is proper transfer meat.

9:24That broke when I was on the radio on Saturday. Stick your Bruno Gimeraj. let's have a bit of Vinny everyone lost their minds everyone was like what what is this it's good stuff isn't it yeah it has approval from the Arsenal execs it's going to cost a lot of money to prize this this gentleman away from his club surely Lukey Moore is he a gentleman yeah I think so I think he's proven himself to be a gentleman has he Vish would you agree with that and a scholar he's had a lot to deal with hasn't he I think it's fine yeah fair enough the financials are huge obviously they're massive I mean it's crazy how much he's asking for it He's going to smash the wage structure.

9:59Is that a good idea? I mean... They can wear it, I think, can't they? So people will say, oh, you know, the general chat will be stuff like, well, if Vinicius Junior comes into Arsenal on low as well, mind everyone else, everyone will get pissed off. And I was like, will they? I mean, because obviously he is brilliant. Just elevate the side of the post. They want to win the Champions League, something they've never done. He's done it. You know, he's clearly available to play in an area they really need upgrading. It kind of fits. And I think, I know I can't get in the mind of a top level professional footballer, but presumably if you say to them, this is the guy who's going to push us over the top and get us the Champions League, you probably take it on the chin that he's earning 500 grand a week and you're only earning 300 grand a week, right?

10:44Yeah, and also if you bring in someone who's going to improve your team, you're more likely to get those bonuses that are within your contract to get you more money as well. Exactly. And yeah, the other side to it is that I suppose the way Arteta has built this particular squad has been through getting people with, obviously not without no ego, but certainly not the kind who would disrupt the harmony or the flow of the team as it is now in a very good space by something is, well, something like Vinicius Junior, one of the biggest players in the world, one of the biggest names in the world coming to your club and earning more money than you.

11:20yeah I mean is that going to upset many people like you said though do you think Reece Nelson's there being like hold on I was told I'd get a fair crack I've turned up for all the pre-season no one else was here put out the cones myself Gabriel Martin he's like I scored a hat trick at Fram Park one of them was my head this is the thanks I get is Arteta just sick of watching this dross just sick of watching this football I mean well I was going to say I don't think so Pete because he's the architect of it it's delivered to the Premier League title it's like That's true. All right, fine. If he turned around the first day of pre-season, they went, I'm sick of all this.

11:54I'm sick of all this. People would be like, well, I don't know where I stand. I'm just doing what you told us to do. So long ago, we're going to the end of the season now. I've got to do it all again with you fucking idiots. Well, there's news that apparently, if they don't land Bruno Gimorish, they're going to go for Alex Scott instead. That's more like it, he says. Well, Bruno Gimorish would be... The silly bang guy. Yes. That's Barry Scott. That's Barry Scott. Bang! Bang. Bang, and the editing football's gone. Is he dead? What? Is he dead? I think that was just a silly rumour. He's just an actor who plays Alex.

12:23Sure. Oh, he got in a car crash with the kid from the Frosties advert, didn't he? That's right, yeah. Surely even both of you. Into Zack and Kenny from Saved by the Bell. Even both of you can surely concede that there's a chance he might be dead, given that everyone died. Yeah. It's a chance he could have died. I'm just struggling to wonder why you're struggling to wonder. I just wonder. The Pete Donelson story. I'll have a Google. Mark Scott Sillip Bang. Yeah. Barry Scott. Barry Scott Sillip Bang. Mark Scott's Pete's midfield colleague from Perfidius Albion he is he's just shout Mark Scott and I was like is that Mark Hasgot or Mark Scott either way listen to it either way it's a big head up it's a big tank it's a big tank big lad the video I will come on to the Bruno Gimrose thing because I think Bruno Gimrose is clearly a player they actually need and they're far more likely to sign him right that looks like it's done it's a fire sale at Newcastle that no one apparently wants I don't think it's necessarily done no one can stop it though No one can stop it.

13:18But Bruno's people are doing their best to get him out there. Yeah, and all Newcastle seem to be doing is signing teenagers like no one's ever heard of. And Eddie Howe was very... I heard Eddie Howe being interviewed on Saturday in what sounded like a children's swimming pool talking about Bruno Gimrares, and I felt really sad for him. Yeah, it's not turned out amazingly. No. So I think Gimrares... They've just signed Aladji Bamba. I wonder what kind of song he's going to get on the terraces. It'll be La Bamba, won't it? Yeah, of course it will be. That was my point. That's fine, though, isn't it?

13:52Yeah, that's fine. That'll be good. That'll be good. Do you want Sister Nancy? They released a video of him in training as well, Bamba. He looked very good. He did look very good. But that was their intention, wasn't it? Because they edited it like that. He's playing against their players. Exactly. Oh, yeah, fucking hell. We do really need him. Yeah, Newcastle looked pretty good against Gateshead at the weekend in a one-all draw. Did Newcastle lose like 8-0 to an Australian A-League All-Stars team as well once in pre-season. Yeah, they never have good ones. But I mean, it has no bearing on the season, generally.

14:20But it does. Let's see. Yeah, let's see. It fundamentally does. Why do him? What's the point? What is the point? You would say that, obviously, Realme did have a new manager in the ship of Jose Mourinho. He's going to be a bit annoyed. I know, I realise that Vinny Jr. is out of contracts pretty much this time next year. So you kind of have to cash in at some point. Well, he's not going to sign a new one. We don't know if that's a negotiation tactic because even the rumours overnight, last night, were that, oh, actually, he's now starting to lower his demands. Right. And maybe this will be a tactic for him to kind of get the deal he wants.

14:55But then Real Madrid, they're going to sign Yandere Mande, which is for a lot of money. They have signed him, yeah. Yes, so I think that's agreed, which then kind of forces the hand a little bit. And if Mourinho wanted him to stay as well, it might have been, you know, ideal for him not to side with Prestiani in that whole racism controversy around Vinicius who he's now managing I mean it's not the greatest introduction to managing a player is it so I think it's an interesting situation I think Arsenal fans should dare to dream on this I hadn't said yeah why would you not if you want out of a club you know for whatever reason I think like what a great sort of if you're not playing in the Premier League what a great place to go Yeah, I mean...

15:41Man City are going to be slashed up by the law courts next season. Well, we don't know what's going on next year. All the next 10 years, all the next 25 years. Heat death of the universe. So often as a Man City United fan, my club are in exactly these kind of rumours as leverage because they're stupid enough to think that they can get a player like that in their current situation. Whereas with Arsenal, it's very much like we have a clear vacancy on the left wing you know really world class left wingers are quite hard to come by with all due respect to Anthony Gordon who I think is a very good player the fact that Barcelona what's point at me like that?

16:20well because he played for your club well yeah I don't think he's that good though well sure maybe that's a better way of framing this because Barcelona go out and sign him because they don't want to sign Marcus Rashford because those demands are too high on Rashford's side Vinicius Junior is a world class left winger the fact that even a team like Liverpool are looking at Bradley Barcala from PSG shows that weirdly, despite so many right-footed players in the world, that that top bracket of left winger, inverted left winger, is quite sparse. And Vinicius is probably at the top of that, I'd say.

16:55Maybe someone like Rafael Liao as well. Kvartoskelia. Yeah, Kvartoskelia. And then he's unattainable though. So when someone like Vinicius comes on the market, you've got to try and get him at least. and Arsenal are at the, you know, the forefront, I imagine at the front of that queue even. So I suppose, yeah, we'll see. I mean, I don't know how official the talks have been between the clubs, but obviously representatives talk all the time. And I wonder what Arsenal need to do to sell him on that move. Like beyond the football side of it, is it London? Is it playing at the Emirates? Is it, you know, being adored?

17:29I wonder if also the brand of Arsenal helps him or if it's more attractive to him. If it's like, you can meet Ian Wright whenever you want. Yeah. he could do it anyway it's not unavailable to him now I don't think Ian Wright is not taking that call is he but with it's a really interesting point but I think if you're Vinny Junior and you're playing at Real Madrid for years and years and you're one of their biggest players you have to understand that really in some way or another leaving Real Madrid is always going to be a step down because you're not going to go to Barcelona from Real Madrid that's not really going to happen there's no I mean I suppose you could possibly argue that Bayern Munich or PSG might not be a step down these days, but it is really, I think, philosophically, and they're not in for him anyway.

18:12He was offered to Liverpool, wasn't he, as well? And they said no. I don't know why. Oh, really? Yeah, that's what Onsteen was reporting. Roller-coaster week for Christos Zollis, though, who came in with quite a fanfare. Got his social media video and everything. Belgian Pro League player of the year last season also plays off the left. And all of a sudden, now no one's talking about him at all. It feels a bit like when James Trafford signed for Man City and they went and got Donnarumma straight away. He played very well in a friendly against MK O'Donnell's at the weekend. Right. So we can all enjoy that.

18:41Why are you watching so many friendly? It's interesting. He got an assist. It was good. You don't even really like watching the main season. Yeah. As soon as it starts. I'm a tennis man these days. Oh, God. Man of the racket. You're a man of the racket. I'm a man of the padel. But I do think it's... You don't play padel, do you? No. No interest. Can't get caught. If anyone is interested, I did speak to Ornstein briefly, guys. And he said, complex deal, but they're really desperately trying hard to make it happen. He said he didn't like it but they had to go along with it. He said, who is this?

19:12Please stop messaging me. In the runner on Solace, he said he last played in English football with Norwich in 2023 where he largely disappointed by Harry Wendt in charge. That is... I don't actually remember that. He was a bit of like a... He's got a gocker energy about it. He's got a great hope, went away. I always think with people coming from Belgium, if you're in a position where you're having to sort of provide assists and goals, you never seem to sort of make that level. I don't think anyway. Did you see that PSG speaking about missing out on Diamande, they issued an official statement to Sky Sports.

19:47He said, PSG will not compromise its principles of sound financial management and squad balance. Where did these principles start then, guys? They also said the Diamande demands were completely unrealistic financially and unacceptable. In the same day, they said they wanted 175 million euros for Bradley Barker that's a good story they follow up to say if you don't like these principles we do have others yeah we have others take your pick absolutely yeah elsewhere Reggie Labrie says Chelsea's pursuit of Sunderland captain Xhaka is closed good news for Sunderland and presumably grant Xhaka as well Alejandro Garnaccio has signed for Aston Villa from Chelsea he's on loan until the end of the season but I mean who wants him really I've got a take on this and I'm interested in yours Vish because obviously you've had him at Man United.

20:34Like, I honestly, I totally understand that he was a player of some promise as a young player, right? And you get a load more latitude when you're of that age, particularly playing in that position. It can be exciting. With Man United, there's a kind of Cristiano Ronaldo, kind of everyone in a way is always, you know, excited for the next one of them to come along. I get that. So he gets a lot of kind of fanfare. Like, since that period of his career, he has done the square root of fuck all, right? I honestly don't understand what the clubs are seeing in him now. I mean, is that harsh? No, no, I totally agree.

21:09There was a point at Manchester United where he was one of the few players who would actually try and take on a fullback, which was a godsend in very static teams. And when Manchester United sold him, I was like, oh, I'm a little bit annoyed, but also, you know, can't be that annoyed. It's only Garnaccio. And he's turned into this figure of fun. And now it feels like he's just a financial make-away. I feel like that is it with him. So how old is he? He's, what, 23? Like he's become that kind of player who, because he's young, because he's homegrown, he holds value and therefore can be used essentially what feels like a deal that's offsetting the Morgan Rodgers deal.

21:51Yeah, that's basically what it is. I think that feels a bit, you know, I was reticent to say that because it feels like you're implying something in that. But yeah, I mean, it's such a strange deal. I cannot imagine, given... Look at Rodgers, how Villa signed him in the first place from Barra. They did a lot of due diligence around him to work out if he was the right player for them. This just feels like, well, I mean... We know he's not really£170 million, but they've given us that up front, so we've got to play ball here. Right. It's just such a strange deal, yeah. Speaking of X-Man United players, Do you see that Jern Sancho has got a suitor in the shape of Al Ryan in the Middle East?

22:36Monkey Alan from the warehouse fancies you. That's what that sounds like to me. Thank you, Al Ryan. Thank you. A really weird career. And it pains me to say it. And not in a nice way. Not in an interesting way. What an interesting career. He's only 26. I know. It's a real shit. And at the top of his game, he is amazing. And I know it's been some time since that happened there. obviously, but just that saga around him going to Man United went on for ages. He was honestly one of the most exciting young players in world football. The time he had at Dortmund was sensational. And I get that there's a lot of factors at play and there's maybe some stuff that will come out that we don't know about.

23:16But from a pure football point of view, it's like, how is he in Qatar at 26? Sonny Pike-esque. How is that even possible? I mean, you say it's Sonny Pike-esque, but Sonny Pike never really played, did he? Jalen Sancho's played in like Champions League finals and stuff yeah that's probably why we've got to be a bit careful with when talking about him in that way in particular because it's I suppose it's like it's not the career that we'd won but you know probably taking a step back yeah probably quite happy but the the most disappointing thing from my perspective anyway is the move to Dortmund was done with a view to like right you need to you're in danger of like wasting this potential yeah you need to essentially leave Manchester go and go and do something with it essentially leave the UK and it felt like he had a great landing spot at Dortmund you know under great management developed really well then obviously comes back to Manchester to a Barclays case club but there was a lot you know there were a lot of raps around him I don't know who else was in for him at the time I can't remember but you know I was very excited when Manchester United signed him and it's just I don't know you hope he's happy but it's also like oh come on man he's also pretty I don't go there at 26.

24:27You also look at the fact that he played in the Euros final. Yeah. And now he's 26 playing in Qatar. I mean, there must be something going on there. There has to be. There has to be. I wish him all the best. I do. I don't want to come across like I'm criticising him for making that move. He's got to do what's right for him and, you know, I don't know the ins and outs of what's happening for him personally, but it comes from a place where you're like, at his best, he's so amazing to watch and that's what we get off your seat watching football, you know. Yeah. And he might actually be happy we don't know that it's just sometimes football is just a job just make as much money as you can and get out that's why you're here isn't it that's why I'm here that's why you're watching Preseason Friendly exactly well coming up after this speaking about looking after the pennies Thomas Tuchel gets on a dirty line bike

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26:28Individual results may vary. Hi, this is Paige from Giggly Squad, and today's episode is brought to you by McDonald's. Honestly, Caesar sauce and a Diet Coke at McDonald's might be the perfect girl dinner. And McCrispy strips dipped in Caesar sauce, no notes. Right now at participating McDonald's, the$2.99 Caesar snack wrap is making me rethink my entire go-to order. Caesar sauce is at participating McDonald's for a limited time, so go try it before it's gone. Prices and participation may vary. Thank you for calling the Bombas Comfort Line. Bombas make socks, slippers, tees, and underwear made with the highest quality materials.

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27:42that was uh a former scottish conservative leader and linesman Douglas Ross getting pelters from a Dundee FC. It's the accent for me. The accent makes it. I bet you like to get your balls fucking grated through a cheese gritter, eh, you Tory puppet. I mean, if you are going to be in Scotland and be a Conservative leader and a linesman... As a linesman. I'm not defending it. I'm not defending it, but you really do. Yeah, you should know what was coming down the pipe. You must simply know the environs. You must be similar with the map, so to speak. Comes with the territory. Comes with the territory.

28:15Exactly, yeah, yeah. I don't know. well Jürgen Klopp has been appointed as the new Germany manager on a four year contract this was remarkable unbelievable it's one of the best press conferences you'll ever see oh yeah it's kind of like I don't need this I kind of don't want it his main kind of messaging was that if you to the media was that if you in this introductory press conference everybody's excited he'd be saying look I'm a big fucking swinging and you need to understand that I don't need this if you behave badly He said, and don't leave my family in peace Then I will be gone I'll just turn away He basically said, I don't need this I don't want this He basically went round to every journalist in that press conference And as he was talking to them, was slapping him on the cheek Being like, look at me I don't need this, you wanted me here I think it might work I think it might work The idea of coming straight out the gate And saying that Is fascinating on so many levels Because it clearly I mean it is it is a bit like soprano-y mafia you know this is how it works you work for me basically I don't know that like you know I wasn't paying attention to the German press during Nagelsmann's tenure but was there any kind of family intrusion?

29:30Yeah so basically the context of this there's two bits of context I think are really interesting one is just on the Nagelsmann one because you brought it up Nagelsmann was quite well known for like taking his family particularly his wife like everywhere She'd be at the training ground. She'd be on the plane with the players. She'd go everywhere. Like Miss Elizabeth. Yeah, like with Macho Man Randy Savage. Yeah, exactly. I'll explain to you. So Nagelsmann is Macho Man Randy Savage, right? He's got the Intercontinental title, right? But he's never won the heavyweight title. And Miss Elizabeth is everywhere on the scene.

30:04And who's the press in this scenario? Sensational Cherie. Right, okay. the press no but basically Nagelsmann so I think what I think what happened was Nagelsmann was getting criticised for that no I think it's not just that I think that part of the press the German press just thought she was fair game right that his family were fair game because he was actively bringing his family into the whole thing yes all the time and so I think that's the I'm not defending it but I think that's the context and then the other thing with Klopp is the fact that obviously the German FA have been chasing him for a while and they chose to go to Red Bull right and I think a lot of people in Germany got a little bit pissed off about that because of the traditionalism of it and the fact that Red Bull are these kind of usurpers.

30:44No one really likes them and there's protests every week about them and all the rest of it. And Klopp, who's seen as this great, amazing hope for German coaching, for German football in general, and quite pure, like quite a purist, introducing this type of football that everyone loves to watch. He then goes to Red Bull. He gets pelters for it. I think he's quite surprised by how negatively he's been received. and I think that's the context of them him finally taking the Germany job going okay you've basically been cunts to me for a while and I've seen you be cunts to other people and so I don't want this to happen again so I'm nipping this in the bud but it did come across as quite passive aggressive for an introductory press conference passive?

31:24aggressive just aggressive quite soprano I mean presumably they didn't follow Yogi Lover around because you know don't want to be so like following leave him alone they followed him everywhere Vish with simply by carrying hand sanitiser behind you yeah what a great way of like you know getting your own distance from people yeah just be absolutely no one's gonna sit next to you on the train exactly just your finger stink of shit grabbing your gabagools all over the place unbelievable but Germany are at a low ebb right I mean Germany I mean they need something and I think they've got a lot of a lot of they're rolling the dice with Klopp and hoping he's gonna do something for them and I also wonder whether it's a huge appointment it is I think it's a great appointment It's massive.

32:06But, you know, I do wonder about these detail-driven coaches and these systems and how much they can implement them. Because if you look at the fact that, say, Zidane's gone to France, there's a lot of crossover between what Zidane did at Real Madrid and what he's going to do at France, by which I mean he gets all the good players, that talks to them, probably does a few keepy-ups in training, talks about how great they are. Everyone respects him because he's Zidane. I don't think anyone is suggesting he's sitting down with the players at any club or place he manages for two hours talking about systems.

32:38And I think you can do that at France probably, the same way he did at Real Madrid. Can Klopp do it? Given they need a lot more work and that he's very detail-driven? I don't know. I think it's an interesting situation. He's quite charismatic. He's quite good with players and stuff. Oh, yeah. He's a big character. He might have to basically just go to a younger generation and bring them through, give opportunities to under-21 players. because you think about like the best things he did at Liverpool at the start, you know, comparing and contrasting and even Dortmund, which I suppose is a bit different because that was very much geared towards the entire principles geared towards younger players.

33:17But giving people opportunities and letting them off the leash a little bit and then bringing them back down to recalibrate to something that was a bit more conservative and more long term. So, I mean, it might be fun for the first few years. Certainly if he's going to be this Aggie. That would be great. Are we great? You might not make a tournament at this point. Did you read, see, hear, consume that Pep Guardiola has turned down the offer of becoming the Italian head coach? A brilliant decision. Where'd this story come from? They talked to him. We can all talk to him in our dreams. In our dreams.

33:50He probably doesn't want the job because he can concentrate on his family life, I imagine. Pep, do you want to come to Capri? Oh, I'd love to. No questions? Yeah, just come over and have a chat. A chat about what? What do you want to talk to me about? it better not be football yeah but every single person who's got any kind of power in football at all is calling Guardiola right phone must be fucking terrible he gets phone calls all the time surely but they also tried to get Ancelotti didn't they yeah and he's like yeah good luck getting a hold of him fucking yeah cheers got a landline blowing his whistle yeah exactly are you training on carnival yeah it's an interesting one but yeah as I said take your beads off you're inside But the really interesting part of the Italian story is the fact that they've gone within about two weeks.

34:36So Paolo Maldini's been in a job at the FA for about three weeks. He's ready to resign now. I know. He loves Pirlo. He wants Pirlo to do the job. They first went after Guardiola, who said no. Then they went after Ancelotti, who said no. Then Maldini's like, we've got to go for Pirlo now. They look like they're about to appoint Pirlo. Most people kick off because his coaching resume is fucking shit, even though he's obviously an amazing player. and then someone just does a cursory bit of work, some journalist, and finds out he's been over to Russia. Yeah, he's in Moscow. Doing ambassadorial work for a Russian betting company.

35:08We did it on the show. He was in Moscow and he basically said, to attribute a political significance to this collaboration is to ascribe to me beliefs that I have never expressed and that do not reflect who I am. He had to shout that over the sound of an oil refinery exploding behind me. I think he's got to be one of the most overrated personalities I totally agree It's just sexy though isn't it Sometimes that's enough You can be handsome and like wine It's fine So Maldini supports Pielo And in the case that he's not hired He's already resigned as technical director After two weeks on the game And you've got to remember that Maldini and Pielo's sons Are working as agents Without having the formal qualifications Very common across football Yeah, but like Davide Lippi cost his dad the job back in 2016 for the same reason.

35:58So it's just a bit of a mess in Italy. I love these nepho. And long may it continue. These nepho babies in Italian football. I know. I didn't accept the German technical director on the 11th of July. Yeah. And he's had a rollercoaster of time. Do you think though he's been in his office being like, oh, it's really sunny. Why have I taken it during the summer? I know. Do it. I should be playing tennis again. The summer never ends yet. Tennis player for a while, wouldn't it? Yeah.

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37:02Individual results may vary. Back to school is busy enough. The last thing you need is shopping that makes it harder. Whether you're moving into a dorm, your first apartment, or just getting organized for the semester, Wayfair makes it easy to get everything you need in one place. Furniture, bedding, storage, decor, study essentials, all at prices you'll love with fast shipping before move-in day. Get everything you need for back-to-school season. Shop Wayfair.com today. This episode is sponsored by Michaels, your destination for all things birthday parties. We just had Lucky's first birthday, and it was so great to be able to go into Michaels and get everything.

37:43Of course, I knew they had craft supplies there, but I didn't realize how expansive their party supplies were. And Michael's really is where you can go to get everything for a party, whether you're planning a kid's birthday or even an adult celebration. They've got over 4 ,500 party supplies, more than 60 different themes, and prices starting at just 99 cents. Plus, they've recently lowered prices on hundreds of items. We found adorable decorations, balloons, everything we needed to pull the party together without making a bunch of different shopping trips. Plus, I always have a good time going to Michael's.

38:14I love shopping there. I could just browse the aisles forever. But if you're short on time, like I always seem to be, you can also get same day delivery or buy online and pick up at the store. They even offer free helium inflation on select balloon styles, which is such a lifesaver. And it was for our party, truly. So if you've got a birthday coming up or just a celebration, remember Michael's everything to celebrate anything. Visit Michael's in-store or shop online now.

38:50Back in England and much maligned England manager, Thomas Tuchel. Is he much maligned? I think so. I'll say maligned. Not much maligned. Much seems to make it out like he's been maligned all the time for everything. Written down, if you need to hit a word count, much maligned. Much maligned, definitely. The much maligned want away German. A little tip for you. If you're trying to get your word count up, just change every single instance of the word like to such as. Double your words there. And then if you want to get down, vice versa. Also, if you look at some of the photos, he's clearly like with someone having quite a jovial conversation.

39:28So you can pretend to lip read and be like, Tuchel was laughing. Ha, ha, ha, he said. Yeah. Another tip of you, a lot of journalists out there. I'll tell you what, it's so easy to see. That's a bit like one of those, I'm Vishal Antaraja and this is my masterclass. You see what ESPN enjoyed the reputation of everything? It's amazing work. Everyone knows how to cook an egg, Ramsey. Shut up. Well, he was spotted riding a line bike, a dirty line bike at that. I mean, what does he expect? Did you put dirty in the running order or is that how they described it? No, I mean, I think it's been, yeah, I think it was, I think the general condition of a line bike was described in the piece.

40:05You're a line biker? I'm a line biker. Actually, you know what? I'm a line lad. I'm not anymore. I've gone full Boris bike now. I want to feel every sinew. tearing as I push against the power. One's battery powered and one's not. You can get a Boris bike that's powered. A good percentage of those ones are powered as well. I think dirty line bike in the running or the smacks of producer Tom, who is quite posh and clean, never ridden a line bike. Have you ridden a line bike before, Tom? No. Are you a Brompton boy? I've ridden a Boris bike. Oh, yes please. So do you punt into work as well? Yeah, right down the river.

40:38The point I was going to make was, have you ever seen a clean line bike? Exactly. Exactly. It's always something in the basket as well. Exactly, there is. Boris bikes don't have them. The big reason... During Ken's tenure is a little mess. They were. You're calling them Boris bikes. I know. Santander boys. The routine when taking a lime bike if you want to be... For those wannabe lime lads out there. Right. The routine is... And ladies. Oh yeah. Spin it around until it unlocks. No, come on. Beep. Beep. Oi, they're running the business. Come on, be respectful. Santander. and the good people at Uber and the good people at Uber yeah and Forest kick both tyres make sure they're still inflated right check the seat right and then take all the rubbish out of the basket and put it put it in the next basket along right yeah it's not littering Thomas are you finished with that yeah Thomas he looked like he was on his way to pick up some kind of take away order oh he looked like he very much could be he's very tall he looked quite cool I thought he looks cool anyway do you know what I mean he looked like he was on his way to a rave yeah I think so he looked like he was on his way to pick up the up for a rave yeah it's Burgain apparently he's in Nine Hill better leave there leave early can I tell you on a bike that's going to take you two days Barry Howard take no time at all to be a guy friend did you say lads have we spoken about the fact that England aren't qualifying or might be for the Euros they probably chose not to didn't they well yeah it's to it'd be very hard for them not to qualify for the Euros yeah you've got those two safety spots if you don't manage to get there.

42:11But Argentina have qualified for the World Cup already because they lost one match in the next one. One match! I'm fucking fuming about this. I'm actually fuming. Do you remember Qatar when they hosted it, they asked to be put into qualifiers so they could keep up their competitive... What if that went badly? Not very well. They got the World Cup, didn't they? That's what they cared about. I think there was a time, I think 25 years ago or whatever, where teams started to say, we don't want to qualify. Because we get no competitive football for such a long cycle that it actually hurts us. That's what the nation's least for, surely.

42:48But I think that might have been for the teams that were holders, right? Yeah. Because the holders used to get Ormac. Yeah, Ormac. France did it after they won Euro 2000, didn't they? Right. Possibly. I can't remember. It's a long time ago. It shouldn't be an opt-in or opt-out of things. That should be part of the prestige. You've got to just deal with it. I mean, the host does need to be there. I mean, that's it. Yeah, no. You can't host a house party and just leave the key in the lock. Do you know what I mean? Well, with teams like Italy and France, you do sort of go... But that's what makes it even funny about Italy.

43:17They haven't pulled off over three World Cups in a row. Yeah, I know. It'd be great if they did host it and it turned into like an Airbnb World Cup. Can you just make sure it's clean when you're done? Because we're not going to be there. Pete, all this chat is all very well and good and everything. It's chat, it's ramble. It's ramble, whatever. Thanks for turning up and hosting, yeah. Yeah, thanks for standing up and hosting. Thank you. Full of Sudafed, talking about dreams of people who don't exist and sniffing all the way through it. Appreciate it. Thank you. And talking about sniffing bike seats as well.

43:45Yeah, sniffing bike. I'm wearing a shirt. John Pock. A 14-year-old meme. 14 years? 2018, thank you. All right, eight-year-old meme then. Italian shit-posting. But the real story is something that popped into our WhatsApp channel. Vish, you backed me up on this a couple of days ago. Right. about you having a particularly good game for your football team and having turned up forgetting your football boots, the bottomers, you forgot the bottomers, left them at home. So you see, and tell me if I'm wrong here, and we did post this on socials, you appear to have claimed to have had a really good game, scored two goals while wearing one old warrior football boot on one foot and a moccasin on the other foot.

44:29Yeah, I mean, just, I found one. With duct tape. Yeah, because the moccasins kept falling off. So tell me what happened, what actually happened from the start. Turned up to the football match. I was... Who were you playing for? I'd tied, it was just a side match. And I turned up and I realised I hadn't brought anything that would allow me to play football. Why did you do that? Because I tied up a car and it must have been lost in the general operation. So usually you keep them in the boot? Usually you keep them in the boot. Always ready. Managed to find an old moccasin and a football boot still in there though.

45:02Always ready. The actual footwork is tied in the way. He's left a moccasin. One moccasin, one other footwork in the car. Yeah, is that what happened? That's what happened. And the moccasin just served me very well inexplicably. So are you right footed? Because you're wearing it on your right foot. I'm wearing it on my right foot and it was a little bit slippy but the warrior, the actual brand was the warrior. The brand was the warrior. The kind of boat was of the gambler. And it was like a left boat and it was in basically where the spare tyre is. You're basically playing Rashford Relayout with your footwork.

45:34Exactly. Just one football boot where the spare tyre is in the car. Yeah. It's falling through after my last tidy up. So you scored goals? Yeah, I scored goals with it. Oh, yeah, sure. So I'm just saying, lads, if you're feeling at 45 years old that your best football's behind you, just strap on a moccasin so you can play a bit of football. What did it give you that you wouldn't have had with the correct footwear? Maybe just people watching my feet too much and going, what's that guy doing? So people were like, I'm not going to tackle him because I might step on his toes. No, no, generally. Yeah, maybe it is that bit though.

46:06Fish, people are not tackling him because I don't want to go fucking near him thinking he's the local fucking maniac that might get fucking sectioned at any point. Imagine him turning up. Do you have other stuff in a plastic bag as well? No, I'd be bag. I'd have about 15 aspirin healers with me. Oh, is this your mate Pete? No, no, no, no, no. I've never met him. No. I've never seen him before. He's that guy in the afters, isn't he? it's massively that it's the guy at the afters yeah but have they asked you back no they haven't what was the best goal you scored with the moccasin it was a tidy timed top right top right at the corner you go whack whack top right at the corner whack yeah that's why I don't commentate top right at the corner whack when you were at the ashes he's top right at the corner whacked it when I was in South Africa for the ashes yeah when you were in South Africa for the ashes the home summer in 23 we played we played we played five a side over the road old boys versus the young boys and Pete scored the winner and it was a fucking beauty to be fair he wasn't wearing a moccasin but it was an absolute beauty next time next time maybe oh you're a golf man now you don't play fives I'm a golf man you're a golf man I'm a limelad I'm a limelad I'm a limelad do bottom men do I cycle up and down the golf course on the limelad swinging it like a polo stick I like that that would be good what's that like digital urban polo yeah digital polo golf club members are famously very tolerant for that kind of behaviour.

47:31Yeah, yeah. It's true. Graham and X says this is a good advert for excessive monster abuse. That's what it does to your kids. Do you say no? Were you fueled by monster at the time? I've actually stopped my monster to try and get on top of this asthma problem. It's not worked. Might go back onto it. Love it. Love that life. Have you thought about inhaling the monster? It's still drinking it. It's still getting it in like a nebuliser. Sort of right into my lungs. Put it right in your asthma medication. I'm like, I'm fucking dry and I'll tell you that. How did nebuliser come so quickly to you? Because he uses one every day, Vish.

47:58No, nebulizers were the one that you plug into the wall and it's like wet. There's like dry powder, there's CFC actuators and all kinds of different... I'm all over the place with me bits and bits. But going forward, if you have the opportunity again, you're going to go back to the bottom-ins? Well, they're very... They're good for protection on the feet because they're thick. Better than that. Yeah. The man from... I can't remember if it was Nike or Adidas. Somebody sent me some boots because they literally said, please don't wear the bottom-ins. I wear bottomers as well and I've got asthma I've got to go to a wall and plug something in he sent me so many I'm on marching cars I wear bottomers help has anyone ever before made something like an endorsement or a gift sound more sympathetic someone sent you a pair of football boots because of your job and they've said in the email please don't do that again just take these Please don't do that again.

48:56Here are some state of the art Adidas slash Nike boots. Don't wear the bottom ones. Please do not post about us at all. Just wear them. Here's some Adidas moccasins for you to wear. It was Adidas. Thank you, Kyle, for hooking me up. I had so many pairs and I turned up with moccasins on. That would improve the brand reputation. Why don't you have a word with any kind of respiratory doctor? Help me out. Yeah, got any... If there's a doctor on the internet. Yeah, to talk to the internet, help Daddy Lungs, to help my lungs out. Daddy Lungs. Daddy Lungs. Because, yeah. We got an email from Tomet Juensu on the old Gmail.

49:35Hi, Rambo boys. Even if I am 18 years younger than this magnificent little man, I wish I was still him. Kazuyoshi Miura, who holds the record for being the oldest Russian footballer. We've talked about him before. King Kazu. King Kazu. He's just got his first goal since 2022 at age 59 for Fukushima United in J League 3. His 41st professional season started in 1985, still going. And it was a tidy finish. Yeah, I saw the goal. I'm troubled the fact that this man appears to still be playing football at this age that he's at, having not scored a goal for four years despite being a forward. Yeah. It's just a gimmick at this point, isn't it?

50:11Well, I mean, he's knocking them in for a third tier side playing an amateur sixth tier side and the person who supplied the assist was a J1 player. So it's all relative and it's a bit of a joke. But, you know, one needs a gimmick in these heightened times. He looks old. He looks old. But he's officially a Yokohama player, isn't he? He's on loan that fucker. Yeah, I think it's probably somebody with his brother or something. I don't bloody know. He last made an international appearance 26 years ago. He retired from international football 26 years ago. He clearly looks after himself, clearly. But it's all becoming a bit silly.

50:42Yeah, but for a 56-year-old man. Yeah. 59, actually, mate. 59. Yeah. I have a bit of respect. He looks great for his age. He's not far away from 60. Helen Mirren looks great for her age she's not playing there he's not going to stop at 59 he's going to stop at 60 if he's going to stop at all what then he's going to do Shakespeare like Helen Mirren yeah potentially potentially Dame King Kazoo Kazoo's stuns in new beats look through ESPN stuff again lovely thank you for listening to the Football Ramble part of the Akash Criter Network we're going to be back tomorrow with our best of the football Ramble 25 to 26 that'll be a short one wasn't it can you miss that mate we were perfect we were good we were absolutely fantastic in that season say goodbye lucky mark goodbye fare thee well vish fare thee well sorry Helen didn't mean it yeah Dame Helen Dame Helen bye

51:46The Football Ramble is a Stack production and part of the Acast Creator Network.

52:05go into Michael's and get everything. Of course, I knew they had craft supplies there, but I didn't realize how expansive their party supplies were. And Michael's really is where you can go to get everything for a party, whether you're planning a kid's birthday or even an adult celebration. They've got over 4 ,500 party supplies, more than 60 different themes, and prices starting at just 99 cents. Plus, they've recently lowered prices on hundreds of items. We found adorable decorations, balloons, everything we needed to pull the party together without making a bunch of different shopping trips.

52:34Plus, I always have a good time going to Michael's. I love shopping there. I could just browse the aisles forever. But if you're short on time, like I always seem to be, you can also get same-day delivery or buy online and pick up at the store. They even offer free helium inflation on select balloon styles, which is such a lifesaver, and it was for our party, truly. So if you've got a birthday coming up or just a celebration, remember, Michael's, everything to celebrate anything. Visit Michael's in-store or shop online now. Take this as your sign to go. Just get out there and go. This summer at Best Western, get 1 ,000 bonus points and a chance to win 250 ,000 bonus points.

53:19Life's a trip. Make the most of it at bestwestern.com. No additional purchase necessary for sweeps. See bonus points, TNCs, and sweeps rules for details. This message is brought to you by Colaguard. If you recorded songs off the radio for a mixtape, it might be time to screen for colon cancer. The Cologuard test is non-invasive, requires no special prep or time off, and you start screening right from your home. It's just three simple steps. Set up, sample, and ship. If you're 45 or older and at average risk, ask your doctor about the Cologuard test. Available by prescription only. Learn more or request a prescription at Cologuard.com slash podcast.

53:59Hi, this is Paige from Giggly Squad, and today's episode is brought to you by McDonald's. Honestly, Caesar sauce and a Diet Coke at McDonald's might be the perfect girl dinner. And McCrispy strips dipped in Caesar sauce? No notes. Right now at participating McDonald's, the$2.99 Caesar snack wrap is making me rethink my entire go-to order. Caesar sauce is at participating McDonald's for a limited time, so go try it before it's gone. Prices and participation may vary. you