Blame the big bloke

0:00Vishay Bhakta: Bow wow wow yippee oh yippee yay everybody. Welcome to the Football Ramble. North London is red and Fizzle's back in business. It's Monday 23rd of February. I'm Marcus Speller. I'm Luke Moore. And I'm the Dishina Hantaraja.

0:24Vishay Bhakta: Hello, everybody. It's Monday. We're in Ramble HQ and we're going to be talking to you about the football that happened on the weekend. Luke's smiling and smirking already.

0:33Luke: Good to get a reminder of what people expect.

0:35Vishay Bhakta: Yeah. Say what you see. Yeah, exactly. You never know with the Ramble, do you? No. You never know. sometimes you do Vish

0:41Luke: Vish has got a basketball jumper on there so maybe he's planning on talking about basketball

0:45Marcus Speller: no Andy's not here so I'll put an end to that any cricket chat? England won England beat Sri Lanka England won the Mii derby and yeah the Vish derby

0:57Luke: nice

0:57Marcus Speller: basically through to the semi-marcars who do you want to win in those games? the better one yeah fair enough financially professionally the better one yeah and justice was served nice

1:06Vishay Bhakta: damn right it was now let's move on to the North London Derby. Tottenham Hotspur 1, Arsenal 4. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Arsenal restored their lead at the top of the table to five whole points. Luke Moore was in attendance, as he often is, because he's a closet Spurs fan slash critic. Luke, have you been ousted yet since you've gone there?

1:27Luke: There's nothing closeted about me. I think we can all agree on that. I'm very, very forthright, in my opinion. I wanted to go to the game because I thought it would be an absolute car crash one way or the other. And it kind of was.

1:38Marcus Speller: You wanted to go to the game because it would be a car crash.

1:40Luke: Yeah, well, if Arsenal lost, it would have been... I mean, they're already having... All their fans are having existential meltdowns despite the fact that they've just restored their lead at the top of the table to five points, as Marcus has said. And Spurs are on historically poor form. So I wanted to attend for both those reasons and I wasn't disappointed. It was an interesting game.

1:59Vishay Bhakta: No, you're an honourable man. Well, it was an emphatic win from Arsenal, of course. Everett, yes, he just loves it, doesn't he? He does.

2:08Marcus Speller: He does, yeah. I didn't realise he hated Spurs that much. I think doing a spin-a-rooney is a bit much for a goal celebration. I enjoyed that.

2:14Luke: It's because he was on the floor already.

2:16Marcus Speller: Yeah. So he thought, I might as well when I'm down here. I thought you'd like that, Vish. No, no, I did. I did. Yeah. Yeah. Right. I was just saying it to say it.

2:23Luke: Did you see that he, that was his first, when he scored against Spurs again yesterday, that was his first shot on target. He scored against Spurs before. Incredible.

2:32Marcus Speller: Yeah. It was, I mean. It's pretty show that Amiobi energy, that. It is a little bit. Yeah. Yeah, break glass for North London Derby. For sure, yeah. The first goal was a lovely kind of reminder that we obviously know they're much more talented than us, but the agility to get his leg up. Yeah, yeah. You know, it's just the thing, oh, that came really naturally to him. I don't think I've ever lifted my leg up that hard. And how quickly he did it as well. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, sorted out the feet.

2:59Vishay Bhakta: Yeah.

2:59Marcus Speller: Also, I appreciate we've spoken about this a lot with all the injuries. I didn't realise it had gotten so bad that Spurs had to play with 10 men. Yeah. It looked comical at times.

3:08Luke: Well, this is the thing. At the game, so the atmosphere at the start was really, really pumping. I think there was an element of it where there was two things to it. One was that people are keen to perhaps be a small part in Arsenal actually throwing in the league title. Obviously, that's motivation for Spurs and their fans, of course. And also the new manager. And the new manager was very visible. Igor Tudor was very visible before the game. He's out there in his coat and he's like, he's marching. He was basically kind of skulking around in a way that you'd never see that Thomas Frank would do.

3:43Luke: And importantly, wasn't Thomas Frank. Well, yeah, that's part of it. Absolutely, yeah. And then they had this big build-up at the start. Paul Coyt, in my view, quite cringe stadium announcer, did a real big piece to Cameron because the screens at Spurs are so big. It was quite impactful. And I think the Spurs fans kind of quite liked it. And the first few minutes, it was loud. It was kind of, it was a derby atmosphere that you'd expect. And what I've found at Spurs this season when I've been there is that because they've been so poor, the fans get quite angry quite quickly. I mean, the last time I saw them was the Chelsea game when they were diabolically bad and the fans got angry.

4:19Luke: Here, when Arsenal kind of did what they did, you know, it was almost a bit like the first goal, for example, that you mentioned, you couldn't really judge the reaction because Spurs, of course, scored so quickly afterwards. And so everyone's like, okay, all right, we're here. And I actually thought, and this may be a minority opinion, you guys may disagree, but at the stadium itself, I felt like for the first period of time, Spurs were actually quite competitive. They're aggressive. They're on their toes. They were definitely performing in a way they did not perform under Frank. Now, I'm not suggesting they deserve to win the game.

4:52Luke: They were the second best team by a mile and Arsenal were worthy winners. But there was enough in that first opening stanza for Spurs fans to be like, okay, we're actually working quite hard here. We're being aggressive. They're one-on-one defending. like for example wasn't that bad. Yeah. A bit of a number on Saka like Dragasin who's Raleigh Dragasin is the is the last player you want 35 yards away from goal being spun but he's a head on a stick right. He will head if you if you said to him you need to still be out there now on Monday morning heading balls he'd be doing it. Right. He's that kind of player and that kind of lends itself to a derby in a way.

5:27Luke: Right. He was matched up against Gokres quite a lot. Now OK Gokres scored a couple of goals. Fine. But I didn't think they disgraced themselves in a way that perhaps they did. In the second half? In the second half.

5:37Marcus Speller: You were talking about the start of the game.

5:38Luke: In the second half, it was bad, right? For sure. But weirdly enough, I wouldn't say as an overall performance it was anywhere near as bad as the Chelsea game, which they only lost narrowly.

5:50Vishay Bhakta: Well, I mean, yeah. The Chelsea game was a while ago. There's plenty of other examples in between that. But I appreciate that you were at that match. They are shit.

5:58Luke: There's no question about it. I take your point. And there's no way to spin realistically. A heavy defeat at home to your fears as drivers. I get that. I'm just trying to apply a little bit of nuance of what I experienced in the ground watching the first half an hour or so.

6:11Marcus Speller: There was... So the period you're talking about, that definitely came through on TV as well. Yves Bissouma was... I think he made a few interceptions. There was Paulinho made one big tackle that got quite the raw. Dragosin, as you said, there were a couple of times he left Giocares on his arse in terms of their shoulder-to-shoulder battles. and then when it came to actually do the stuff with the football I think they were awful I think Xavi Simons had a really intriguing game because he was clearly him and Colin Mouane were so far up there that they basically had to play with each other and the number of times Simons just held onto the ball too long went down a blind alley and basically lost all momentum it looked like really juvenile play from him but other than that at the same time He was also the only person who was trying to play.

7:03Marcus Speller: And it created such an awkward disconnect.

7:05Luke: And that's been partly the issue, because the ball carrying thing for Spurs is a big deal. And Simons has found it tough to adjust to Premier League, although he has been, I think, improving. I thought Colin Wollin was okay. And the justification for what I'm saying, I suppose, about the first half is they go into halftime 1-0, right? They massively benefited from the refereeing communication issue, the IT issue because that just killed the game dead when Spurs were really under the cosh and they were able to kind of fill their way back in after that

7:34Vishay Bhakta: yeah we need 10 minutes

7:35Luke: yeah it was ridiculous when you're in the stadium itself it was absolutely ridiculous but look I think having said what I've just said they had opportunities there to impress the new manager to show why they should be playing as individuals in the team I know that they've got so many injuries that the team basically picks itself but anyway and they were able to put together about 20 minutes and other than that they were very heavily beaten. But what was also really interesting, two more points you want to make about the stadium experience for those who weren't there. The one point I'd make is that I was expecting it to get angry when they conceded so quickly after half-time.

8:14Luke: And then, of course, Eze adds the third. It was actually just a bit of resignation. It was a bit kind of like, oh, right. Even the guys near me who walked out, it wasn't like a kind of, we're storming out because this is ridiculous, performative. It was almost just like slopey shoulders, head down, well, I might just get home.

8:28Vishay Bhakta: Yeah, because they've been handily beaten by a much better side.

8:30Luke: But it was resignation, Mark, because there wasn't the anger that you'd seen before.

8:34Vishay Bhakta: Well, I think they've done the anger. Yeah, probably. And I think they're just floating towards acceptance.

8:39Luke: And the second point I want to make very quickly, if I may, is that in the concourse before the game started, they were shown the Liverpool Forest game, right? And no joke, pretty much every single Spurs fan in there celebrated that Liverpool winner like it was a Spurs goal because they know how much of a relegation battle they're now in.

9:00Vishay Bhakta: They are in it. They have a chance to get out of it. Everybody does down there, but they're in it. Not Wolves. Not everyone. And it's mathematically possible.

9:11Vishay Bhakta: What do you think of the game anyway? Well, I think that you've been fair slash generous to Spurs there. But look, I take the point with regard to the atmosphere and so on and so forth. I message a couple of Arsenal mates. not even before halftime. And I said, Arsenal have no excuse not to win this game. Yeah, for sure. Because you're right. I think when it's a derby game, there's a new manager and all the rest of it. As you say, the stadium announced. So they're trying to speak it and will it into existence. 100%. A decent Spurs performance. And they probably did that for 35 minutes or whatever it was.

9:46Vishay Bhakta: But Arsenal, time and time again, were coming forward. Spurs, at times, were trying to play quite high. They nearly got caught out a couple of times. It was inevitable. and it was obvious that in that second half Arsenal were going to score goals and it's just as well Jocker has scored the fourth because actually 3-1 if I was an Arsenal fan I would have thought we should have given them more

10:04Marcus Speller: I think if you're an Arsenal player or even a fan coming back home after that game you should be insulted at the idea that that team that was put out in front of you today was expected to get something against you I think like a lot of this game can be kind of fashioned into motivation going forward. But actually, Spurs were that bad that Arsenal should probably look at it and think, you know what? We're not going to face a worse team in the next 10 games. And we need to kind of, you know, we can't even take too much from this performance. But what they can take is a lack of respect in many ways that people expected.

10:45Marcus Speller: Not people expected, and you kind of touched on it there, we kind of like will it into existence because we want, as neutrals, we want the competition. We want a fun end to the league. it's entertainment after all but yeah like Spurs were bad bad I messaged him seven minutes into the game and I said you're winning this he's an Arsenal fan I said you're winning this 4-1 and I'm only giving him a 1 because occasionally you do something silly I didn't realise Declan Rice was going to do something silly but yeah

11:11Vishay Bhakta: well it got to the point where it went as I say Arsenal 3 went up and they were going forward and they were missing chances on making the wrong decision in the final third or whatever and I honestly thought to myself bearing in mind there's an Arsenal side who have been criticised for their lack of sort of swashbuckling spirit and lack of punishing teams. I know they've scored a fair few goals in the league, but they've not been as scintillating going forward as other teams who are leading the way in the Premier League have been in previous seasons. And I thought to myself, bloody hell, lads, you know, this league title could well go down to goal difference.

11:46Vishay Bhakta: There's a chance here to put a couple on the board. As I say, so I think Jokoriz II made it a little bit more accurate. But look, Spurs were bad. There's no doubt about that. I didn't expect much from them. We didn't get much from them. I still can't believe that a side who, it's not a brilliant squad, but my goodness, it's a squad of players who, I just can't believe that it's that bad. It's harsh to give Tudor plenty because he's only just got there. And the reason why he has been brought in is because they are diabolically bad, as you say. I just, I look at this and I think, okay, it's one game.

12:21Vishay Bhakta: let's give them a bit of time etc etc and so on but Spurs fans are rightly celebrating a Liverpool winner against Forest because they are in a relegation battle and it is damning

12:32Luke: no one's got a worse record than them in the form table at the moment it's a very very poor time to be in that situation they picked up one point in February which is one more than I thought they'd get and that was the state they managed to salvage a draw against Man City but they're in a position now where every game looks hard for them look I think they were bad my experience of watching them live was that they were bad I don't think they were quite as bad as you guys are saying although everyone else seems to be saying they were so I'm happy to take on board that I'm in the minority there I came away from the game before I watched back the highlights and started reading a bit around it where I kind of you know was slightly disavowed of a few of my opinions I felt like I saw enough from them in the first half an hour or so to say that they they'll if they can find a way to defend a bit more resolutely, they might be okay against Crystal Palace at home who've been poor, or they might win that really important six-pointer against Forest in a few weeks' time.

13:26Luke: They might be okay, but it's touch and go. If you look at the games they've got lined up, Fulham away looks tough for them. Fulham have shown themselves to be able to put together good performances. I felt like if Palace didn't win yesterday, I thought Glasner would go, and then you don't know who you're facing when you play. What I was getting at was just this idea that for a team the size of Spurs to be relegated, loads of stars need to align in a certain way. And it needs to be things like cycling through managers, making a really poor appointment, losing 11 first-team players to injury, playing key games where other teams have just got a new manager.

14:04Luke: All these kind of things need to happen. And it's not, I don't think it's too much of an exaggeration to say those things are actually happening. And so they've got themselves, in the words of Graham Taylor, they've got themselves into this mess. They've got to get themselves out of it. but as I said at the top of this you can't realistically if you're predisposed to liking Spurs which I'm not really but even if you are you can't realistically spin a 4-1 defeat at home to your fiercest rivals when they're going for the title and you're having a nightmare it is what it is and I just wonder whether they will have just about enough just about enough to survive the other thing that's kind of interesting is that as far as I know Igor Tudor is a manager who likes to attack.

14:49Luke: He likes to play free at the back. He likes to attack. And I don't know if this is the time for them to be trying to attack. They need to somehow stop conceding. They need to somehow get a platform to build from. And they need to be able to beat the teams around them when they play them. If they don't do that, they might go down. They genuinely might go down.

15:08Vishay Bhakta: I would say that if he indeed is a manager that likes to attack, I don't know too much about his managerial career in terms of style and so on, then at least it's something at least it's a plan at least it is some sort of idea of what they're going to do when they go on the pitch because right now you kind of go not really attacking they're not really defending it's bleh

15:26Luke: but I don't think you can say they're as listless as they were under Frank I think under Frank it's a very small sample

15:32Vishay Bhakta: and it's a derby and for all the reasons given I mean you know the in-stadium announcer said before the game they're worried they're nervous as hell we're calm we're ready you know everything everybody connected to that club in some way who contributes in some way to the matchday experience is trying their absolute damnedest to influence it in some way. I mean, even old Timmy Sherwood was urging the Spurs fans to sing, it's happening again. Well, of course, it did happen again. They lost.

16:01Luke: He was right. At this point, Timmy Sherwood's just an unhelpful presence. A very unhelpful presence.

16:07Vishay Bhakta: Where is he a helpful presence? I'm not sure. Black Van Rovers title winning reunion parties? Chile sale? Yeah, true. we should turn our attention to Arsenal a bit because they did win and they won pretty comfortable in the end we've mentioned Eze but old big Victor Djokeres had a very good game Gary Neville gave him man of the match

16:22Luke: I think he's he's definitely if you if you can if you can get him to lean into being instinctive more I think he he'll be okay he can strike the ball we know that yeah because because like he looks a bit lumpy and a bit kind of I know what you mean a bit kind of slow of thought yes now he does he does at the very top level the very top level I mean it does sound harsh

16:47Marcus Speller: but that's I know you don't mean it in a mice and men way but no I don't but you say so about like

16:54Luke: Vicario in the Spurs goal like it takes him so long for his thoughts to go from his head to his feet you can almost see it happening he's got a bit of that about him

17:00Vishay Bhakta: that was one of the things reported by inside sources you know the other big Premier League sides looked at Jokeres and filmed kill the mouse if you like it was a case of he just needs that extra little bit at a time, which you may well get in the Portuguese top flight, but you might not get in the Premier League. I do think with Jacare, I think he's done all right this season. Because of the price tag and the team he's going to, and he's the man, he's the missing piece sort of thing. He's a top scorer. It was, unless he had an unbelievably good season, it was always going to be tricky. And look, I'm not trying to be all wise and go, oh, well, actually, I think he's done all right.

17:39Vishay Bhakta: but you know this is a totally new thing for Joaquin playing for Arsenal in the Premier League a side who arse top they are going for the title etc and so on so it's not inconceivable that he may need a bit of time bedding in but of course they bought him to hit the ground running and we are where we are but look took that first goal of his beautifully well in fact even the second one it's exactly what you're saying

18:03Luke: he can be a bit of a unit

18:05Vishay Bhakta: he's a big boy he's got broad shoulders you know just battered that that defence was there for the taking and he showed that.

18:11Luke: I feel like when I talked about Dragasin earlier, I feel like he kind of, he wanted that kind of defender to play against.

18:18Marcus Speller: I thought that, yeah. It was a good battle. I know what you mean.

18:20Luke: But Dragasin looks, you know, to be fair to me, he's not played an awful lot of football, but he looks, like I say, ahead on the stage. He's a good, a good standard championship defender, probably. So, I'm not taking anything away from Gokariz, but it's really tricky when you talk about games like this because I want to give Arsenal credit for coming off the back of what they suffered at Wolves, the pressure that Man City put them under, knowing that if they'd lost the game against Spurs, they could have gone into next weekend off the top of the table because Man City played before them. A lot of associate pressure come along with that.

18:50Luke: And they are playing against a team who are their fiercest rivals. And remember all those times that unfancied Man City would give Man United a black eye or something like that? Because it can happen. It can just happen. And they navigated that really well. There were a couple of storms to weather. and I thought Spurs scoring that equals so quickly was very interesting because I always feel like it's the hallmark of not a top side to concede so quickly after you score. It shows a bit of a strange mentality, I think, and that's what happened, but they still bounce back. So they do deserve some credit, but again, based on what you guys are saying, from what you experienced, it might have just been that they're not up against much.

19:29Luke: It might not be legitimately Spurs are shitter than Wolves. We just don't know. So they did what they had to do. you know I thought Arsenal didn't have to be that good but they were good enough

19:42Vishay Bhakta: I mean indeed one thing though that Spurs need to sort out is Randall Colomawani assaulting defenders because otherwise he'd score more goals

19:50Marcus Speller: that was soft wasn't it it was I I mean it was well bought I didn't think it was a foul but did he get a bastard in the end let's see yeah obviously Gabriel is I tell you what

20:04Vishay Bhakta: He lives very dangerously, Gabriel.

20:06Marcus Speller: He does, yeah. Also, I think... I suppose... I mean, I hate that VAR is making me do this, but I suppose because the referee gives it, VAR aren't going to overturn it. But if the referee hadn't given it, then VAR probably don't pull him up on it and probably have allowed the goal. I know what you mean. It looked like a foul from where I was sitting straight away

20:26Luke: because Gabriel did so well exaggerating the contact.

20:28Marcus Speller: He timed the dive perfectly.

20:31Vishay Bhakta: Look, yeah.

20:32Marcus Speller: It wasn't a foul. I have to say that it wasn't a foul but he bought it let me feel a little later yeah

20:37Vishay Bhakta: I yeah I think that if I'm an Arsenal fan I'm thinking to myself okay Gabriel you got away with that one please stop doing that

20:46Marcus Speller: I think certainly on my timeline and the Arsenal fans I know I feel like all reasonable ones know that wasn't a foul but I like chuffed with it yeah happens okay

20:57Vishay Bhakta: well of course Arsenal are top of the league they're five points clear Man City have a game in hand Man City beat Newcastle United 2-1 at the Etihad. I mean, he was, Newcastle weren't terrible or anything, but they always beat them at home, Man City. But again, you saw the scenes of celebration after the full-time whistle. And I find this fascinating because again, people are saying, you know, Man City, they've got the bit between the teeth and whatnot. And Arsenal, both sides, whenever they play, there is a, there's a nervousness to both home, to both fans, particularly if they're at home. And when they win the game, there's that element of relief which we don't often think you think of Liverpool last season there was no relief because there wasn't much of a title challenge they expected and they did it there were some spectacular examples when they won against Brentford away from home for example when Nunes scored and whatnot in other seasons like that Man City would win or Liverpool underclocked when they were going for the title they would win of course we've won today it's almost like how have the others have gone whereas this is oh go on we've got the three points thank goodness for that and it's an intriguing title race as a result.

22:02Luke: We've got a legitimate title race.

22:03Vishay Bhakta: They are two marathon runners and it feels like that, you know, when one is slowing down a bit, the other's speeding up and vice versa and so on. But they are really, I think that they are going to be slogging it over the line come towards the end of the season. I hope so. And therefore, I think this is going to be a great title race.

22:18Marcus Speller: And I think it makes it that much more watchable when you see those scenes in the stands and on the pitch where it is actually just relief. Donnarumma save off Gordon, which I didn't realise was going in until seeing maybe the second or third angle of it. the reaction to that is like all those players like Don Romo he's won so many little things all those fans they've seen so many titles some of those players have as well and yeah we're allowed to be excited for this

22:43Vishay Bhakta: I think so yeah and also as well Man City seem to have some sort of cheat code in which they can't get players sent off at home they've been investigated

22:49Marcus Speller: for that it's fine at least they're

22:51Vishay Bhakta: worries you might say it's one of the charges yeah I mean Phil Foden managed to afford a red card against Phil and Bernardo Silva managed to afford a second yellow despite doing some NFL stuff on Big Dan Byrne. That was outrageous.

23:04Marcus Speller: Yeah. Why are you looking up? It doesn't need much of a thought. No, no, it is, but it's a bit like, I don't know. He shoulder barred him. No one arrested David for I can't believe what you've done to Goliath. Yeah, exactly. It's also, it's kind of like, he's a big fucker, he deserves it.

23:18Luke: You can't get busted for like environmental damage if you're going up against a mountain with a toothpick. Is that right? Yeah. I think if Dan Byrne was like half the side, it was bad. It was outrageous. Outrageous. But we see, we see inconsistencies all the time now though I mean and also obviously for reasons known only by them VAR can't intervene for second yellows even though they quite famously lead to red

23:40Marcus Speller: can you imagine it the other way around it's just a red

23:43Luke: it's just a red by a different method

23:45Vishay Bhakta: but I felt sorry for old Dan Byrne because he had his head ruled offside because Ruben Diaz pushed him offside

23:53Marcus Speller: it's the you can just do what you want to him is that what this is I don't know if you came across this like when you were going out at uni or even before that but he's asking me Marcus yeah you know there's you know there's some of those like rowdy little fellas who just like oh he's that's a really tall person in the barn I'm going to try and fight them

24:10Vishay Bhakta: yeah now we last meet

24:12Marcus Speller: so we met yeah but you know but like the big bloke always gets in trouble for that yeah yeah yeah so that I feel like that's what Dan Burns fallen foul of here being tall yeah

24:21Vishay Bhakta: I felt like though he had it coming though if you're going on that I think Dennis Wise got appropriately punished a lot of times

24:26Marcus Speller: I mean, if you're only that much of a prick on TV.

24:29Vishay Bhakta: Yeah, I hope you can get away with that. Fine.

24:31Luke: I mean, if you push someone into an offside position to make them offside, it's a good tactic. There needs to be, it's not against the law. It is. You can't be offside if you get pushed offside. No, but the way you said it was like it's against criminal law. No, no.

24:42Vishay Bhakta: The laws of the game.

24:44Luke: It should be a foul. Obviously, it should be a foul. Yeah, I don't understand the rationale for that.

24:48Vishay Bhakta: I think it's a loophole.

24:49Marcus Speller: No, but it's generally in the laws. You can't be called offside if you're pushed offside. All right, boffin.

24:55Luke: Yeah, nerds taking over the game. I think we've heard enough

24:58Vishay Bhakta: from your lot

24:58Marcus Speller: Experts

25:00Vishay Bhakta: Nico O 'Reilly scored a brace proving that he's not a left back he's a midfielder just put him in midfield I'll tell you what he is

25:06Marcus Speller: but he came through as a midfielder I know which is why

25:09Vishay Bhakta: whenever he was playing left back

25:10Luke: you guys are missing the point he's proven himself he's proven himself again to be whatever Guardiola wants him to be he's playing like as an attacking left side midfield player and scores two goals yet there's a chance he might go to the World Cup as a left back

25:23Vishay Bhakta: he's not going as a left back if he goes to the World Cup

25:25Luke: he's a very very versatile all round player

25:28Vishay Bhakta: the other lad who scored in the game will be the left back of the World Cup is that right Lewis Hall little Lewis Hall backed up by Luke Shaw you've heard it here first there we go Pep did tell his players you've heard it here first

25:38Marcus Speller: but not for the first time yeah whether you want it or not

25:41Vishay Bhakta: Pep told his players to have some caipirinhas and

25:47Luke: how do you say that one no you say it try and say it don't tell them anyone try and say it daiquiris

25:52Vishay Bhakta: daiquiri it's a daiquiri daiquiri oh it's a daiquiri Of course it is, yeah. Come on. Daikiri is lovely stuff. Sorry about that, everybody.

26:00Luke: Don't apologise. Fantastic. That's going to be the next meme of the week. A daiquiri. Yeah. I don't know why it's spelt like that and pronounced like that. Daiquiri Sanya. But it is. There we go. There we are. You could have done that, couldn't you? I should have done that. That would have been one of yours.

26:12Vishay Bhakta: Yeah.

26:12Luke: But I like the difference between Pep and Arteta because obviously Pep is seen as the master and Arteta is the apprentice. And last week, Arteta tried to really like, he didn't really sell it. He wasn't into it himself. He said, I need to find a way for my players to have more fun and it didn't really work Just get on it lads And now Pep's like

26:28Marcus Speller: get yourself a cocktail boys

26:30Vishay Bhakta: Exactly yeah

26:30Marcus Speller: Do you think there's a lot of because Arteta worked under Guardiola Guardiola might feel that sometimes Arteta's copying him and do you think he's trying to seed things out there Little bluffs Love that

26:40Luke: Oh get on the ket lads I reckon I might play eight at the back Saturday Well they're playing

26:46Vishay Bhakta: Leeds next They are So they're going to have to do that At Leeds as well And Donnarumma will be wary of Anton Stack's free kicks Fucking gorgeous goal

26:52Luke: that isn't it Lovely one. These haven't been too bad. They've been quite good recently.

26:56Vishay Bhakta: They have. What a freak. Lovely. All right, let's go for a quick break.

27:11Luke: I've only been here two months, but I feel a real peace with the people here, the kindness of everyone, and like I say, there's a real exciting future ahead for Saudi Arabia.

27:23Vishay Bhakta: That was, well, back to the Football Ramble. Future Man United manager Brendan Rodgers there. Thanks to Friend of the Ramble, Ricky.

27:29Marcus Speller: In these three envelopes, the names are three different states. One of them is going to bring about the end of the world.

27:37Vishay Bhakta: Thanks to Friend of the Ramble, Ricky, for sending us that clip. Ricky!

27:40Luke: Let's let Brendan have a go on the orb. The glowing orb.

27:43Vishay Bhakta: You can become a Friend of the Ramble too. Search patreon.com forward slash football ramble or click that join button on YouTube to get involved.

27:50Luke: Why is everything Brendan does so cringe? Yeah. He makes it sound really cringe. I saw him posing with the old rifle.

27:58Vishay Bhakta: I saw him just nudging the doomsday clock. It was a little bit closer to midnight. All key. Right, we're five to midnight. All key. And then Richard Keyes turned up and went, what if I was to move that clock there, Andy? Right, anyway. Chelsea won, Burnley won. Chelsea dropped two points in their bid for a Champions League place. What a point for Burnley. Could have been more. Burnley came away from this game. and understandably disappointed that they didn't win the game because they had a chance late on. But look, it has to go down as a good point for Burnley. It would be ridiculous not to say that.

28:32Vishay Bhakta: Chelsea did put themselves under a bit of pressure when Wesley Vofana was shown a second yellow with about 20 minutes to go.

28:38Luke: I mean, I think Wesley Vofana is one of the most dislikable players in the Premier League. Why is that? For the reason I've already said, we tried to run over Dean Gaffney for one.

28:46Vishay Bhakta: He did run over him. Wait, there you go. He was successful.

28:49Luke: Okay.

28:50Marcus Speller: He's lucky that he's only run over Dean Gaffney.

28:52Luke: He successfully run over Dean Gaffney. Yeah, yeah. Who knows? Yeah, I mean, he's driving alone. My goodness me. Yeah. And that second yellow, making that challenge when you're on a yellow is idiotic. Absolutely idiotic. And so Burnley, I mean, and Chelsea have got a terrible habit for this, you know, and Liam Rossellini...

29:12Marcus Speller: It's got to be deliberate at this point. Maybe their squad is so big and it's a form of rotation. It's like, right, if everyone's going to get a game here, one of you is going to need to fall in the sword. Kick the shit out of someone, yeah. We're not going to escape to victory, you, and break your arm. No. But you're going to have to try and break someone else's leg. Yeah.

29:28Vishay Bhakta: It's disappointing from Chelsea, isn't it? I mean, look, they had a new manager bounce under Liam Rosinio, of course. But their last couple of results, what, their couple of draws, disappointing ultimately when they've had Leeds against, well, Leeds and Burnley. And it must be maddening being a Chelsea fan with that lack of obvious consistency. because 1-0 up so early on against a side who everyone's got down doomed for relegation and to not win that game. I understand they're not going for the title or anything but Champions League is going to be very, very important because you have that pack of teams.

30:05Vishay Bhakta: If you qualify...

30:05Luke: That's going to be a good race as well this season.

30:06Vishay Bhakta: Well, it is going to be a good race because look, if you can finish in that in that sort of top, what it'll be, it'll be five, we expect, then imagine that would be damning for Liverpool. That's how you can sign better players although I know Chelsea's transfer policy seems rather wrong. But still, in theory, that's what you would say. So it's vitally important because really, unless Aston Villa, and I appreciate they only drew on the weekend, unless they have a bit of a drop-off, you'd say the top three are probably, well, the top two are definitely locked in. I don't think too many people would argue with that.

30:36Vishay Bhakta: And you would expect Villa to hold on to third. Just Chelsea, Man United, Liverpool. One of them, if we are expecting Villa to finish third, will miss out on Champions League football next season. Now I know Man United haven't had European football this season, but still though, with that carrot being daggled, so for Chelsea to drop points at home to a side who have been in the relegation zone all season, very, very frustrating for them.

30:59Marcus Speller: Well, they haven't beaten the promoted sides at home this season. Yeah. And so after this game, they play Arsenal, Villa, Newcastle, Man City, Manchester United, Liverpool, and finish the season of Sunderland I've just picked out the difficult games there from them that they have remaining can't take any of that for granted yeah but they'll probably win four of those games yeah but like Chelsea are so try beating as you said try beating the team at the 19th at home

31:27Luke: not if you fail to pick up marking assignments if marking assignments are missed you're not going to win games lads

31:33Vishay Bhakta: yeah that's what Rosini admitted after the game didn't he a marking assignment was missed with regard to the Burnley equaliser which was a beautiful corner from James Wall-Prauss and headed in very nicely by Zion Fleming he said I'm not here to throw players under the bus I will always protect my players and I'll deal with it during the week but there was a player assigned that duty who marked the wrong man why is he talking

31:53Marcus Speller: like it's the Cold War I know

31:56Vishay Bhakta: who was marking him then because we can see from the video

31:58Luke: it's a it's not exactly the most difficult look our number five

32:02Vishay Bhakta: should have been I'm not going to name him because that would be unfair

32:06Luke: he also got set off yeah

32:09Vishay Bhakta: yeah yeah yeah I mean look it's

32:11Luke: he talks about he talks in every interview like he's doing a TED talk.

32:14Vishay Bhakta: He does, yeah.

32:15Luke: I feel like he should have one of those buttons in his hand to press the screen behind it.

32:20Vishay Bhakta: He also claimed that his side have set fire to four points after they obviously drew that game against the Leafs.

32:24Luke: I like the poetry and the drama of that. Quite a Shakespearean way of saying it.

32:28Vishay Bhakta: Yeah, but they've dropped 19 points from winning positions in the league this season. Not all of them are his fault, but yeah. Not all of them have been at home, but 17 of them have been, Mish. That is maddening. Maddening if you're a Chelsea fan, of course. Only West Ham have dropped more.

32:42Marcus Speller: I can't tell with Chelsea as a squad, and it comes from the state of flux and whatever, and how these players have come into the team, and how many of them are looking over their shoulder. I can't tell if they like each other.

32:56Vishay Bhakta: Well, it's interesting you say that, because, and here I go, but I was talking to a source at the club, and, well, he became a source when I started talking to him.

33:03Luke: Is this going to be a wicked whisper?

33:05Vishay Bhakta: And, yeah, and was saying about Chelsea that, what you've touched on there, actually, I think is quite true. I was saying at the start of the season, actually, I was suggesting quite the opposite in that, like when Liam De Lapp came back and he scored against Barcelona, it was, you know, the way the players all went round him and celebrated, and I thought, oh, there's a bit of team spirit there, you know, and one or two other examples of that, which you tend to get if the squad is quite harmonious. But then as time's gone on, you know, I was talking to this person and they were saying, I'm quite sure that this particular player, high-profile Chelsea player, and that one who play in quite different areas of the pitch, I reckon off the field of play they've probably never had a conversation because you get these little cliques now I know cliques exist in all squads but of course it is up to the it's got such a big squad you've got so many cliques and it's also up to the management to try and get it all together

33:54Luke: was it Rory Jennings? it wasn't Rory Jennings but you're BFF I like Rory I know you do that's why I said it yeah

34:01Vishay Bhakta: what's wrong?

34:02Luke: well because you said it's a Chelsea source and I thought he was the most likely Chelsea source

34:05Vishay Bhakta: no it's somebody who works at the club

34:06Luke: oh okay right fine it's a Rory Jennings

34:10Vishay Bhakta: but I yeah and I think you can see that there are players who again they won't socialise they won't none of that and much has been made of this Chelsea side the lack of maturity and the amount of leaders I mean Enzo Fernandes is one of the more experienced and older heads I wouldn't say wise though when I'm talking about Enzo Fernandes he is an arsehole exactly and again I've mentioned this before the amount of times I've heard people say they miss say in particular but also someone like Cesar Asper-Lacueta who was a you know that sort of player who would go right come on we're all doing this now we're bringing people together and yeah

34:48Marcus Speller: who's also a link to the past and like a different way of doing things which is why I do actually feel a bit sorry for the players because they're just a product of their environment aren't they?

34:59Vishay Bhakta: Well indeed you would say this is probably more by design yeah again the way that club is run I have sympathy you know and it's difficult for Liam Rosinha who again that's all part of the design as well. He comes in and for him to try and...

35:13Marcus Speller: Well, it's very American sport, isn't it? When you consider the fact that you see it all the time in, I suppose, NBA trade season just recently. Players just get caught up and be like, by the way, you're moving across the country. But also... Pack your stuff. You're then going to move to somewhere else as part of their trade deal, but you've got to leave here, basically. But that kind of feels like a bit what Chelsea did.

35:32Luke: And we're going to do multi-club ownership on the Mabag tomorrow. We are going to do that, yeah. We are going to do that, yeah. A specific subject.

35:38Vishay Bhakta: And look, I'm on thin ice when I'm talking about American sport, but I can imagine in NFL, you literally have a defensive side of the team and then an offensive. But there's also a load of them. Do they know each other? I don't know. But do they need to? It's not a time to answer that question.

35:51Luke: I like that you're using this Chelsea dropping some points at home to Burnley as a way into bringing people together. Yeah. I like that. So it's what people like about you, Marcus. Thank you very much, sir.

36:02Vishay Bhakta: You try and bring people together. I do. Whether they want to or not.

36:05Luke: No, exactly.

36:06Vishay Bhakta: I want to merge all the nations and create a super nation. Anyway.

36:11Marcus Speller: You keep bringing this up, but we've said it to you before. Sort out Glasgow first, and then talk about the rest of the world.

36:17Vishay Bhakta: Okay, it's Glasgow.

36:18Marcus Speller: Yeah.

36:20Vishay Bhakta: For those north of the border.

36:21Luke: Marcus is a good old-fashioned Rangers man. He ain't going to bring it together. Here we go.

36:26Vishay Bhakta: I'll tell you what, hearts are going well. There's only one union. The most surprising thing on the weekend, actually, was when Rangers were given an opportunity. The referee, and I will word it like this, was given a great opportunity to give Rangers a penalty to potentially win the game and he didn't take it. Wow. Ladies and gentlemen, what is going on in Scotland?

36:43Luke: That's why you're on the first train to Glasgow after this recording, isn't it?

36:46Vishay Bhakta: I tell you what, it's happening. Get me to Hollywood. What's going on? Anyway, I want to talk about Zion Fleming. He scored a lovely header and he's trying to rouse the troops in the post-match. He said, everyone knows the gap is massive if you look at the table, but of course we can stay up. We know we need a miracle or something extraordinary. we're trying to put in an extraordinary input to try and get an extraordinary outcome he's been affected by Liam Rosini with that kind of language but I like it Luke

37:11Marcus Speller: maybe there's something is there a gas leak in the tunnel maybe that's why he's talking like this

37:16Vishay Bhakta: maybe that's what it is

37:17Luke: I think they've got this is controversial and I don't think they are going to stay up that's not controversial no no no the bit I'm about to say is perhaps a bit more controversial if I may and that is that if you were to try and find reasons why you thought Burnley could stay up you would look at the home games they've got left in the league this season. Yeah. Brentford. Bournemouth. Brighton. Wolves. 12 points for you there if you want them, lads.

37:42Vishay Bhakta: Oi. Can I quote Tom Jones?

37:44Luke: Oh. Ooh. Yeah. No, exactly. Yeah. Exactly. There you are. So I think the thing with Burnley is that there's situations where you think maybe could they have done, they've got quite a few draws that perhaps could have been wins. I mean, they are adrift. There's not been quite as much attention on how bad they've been because obviously Wolves have been a lot worse. But there is points there for them for the rest of the season if they can go and get them. Would it be enough? There are eight points in it, so probably not.

38:11Vishay Bhakta: Probably not. Gentlemen, something more serious I need to mention. After the game, both Hannibal and Wesley Fofana, both playing in the game, were racially abused on Instagram after which Chelsea released a statement. Such behaviour is completely unacceptable and runs counter to the values of the game and everything we stand for as a club. There is no room for racism. We stand unequivocally with Wes. he has our full support as do all our players who are too often forced to endure this hatred simply for doing their job I mean particularly that last sentence I think is one where you go yeah

38:43Luke: yeah I agree with the statement obviously and yeah despite what I said about Wesley Fafana earlier I mean no one deserves to be abused for the colour of their skin regardless of you know whatever goes on so yeah totally agrees unacceptable happening too often we had to talk about a load last week as well didn't we for other depressing reasons so yeah really sad to see it

39:00Vishay Bhakta: yeah indeed indeed let's pop down to the championship we've been talking about relegation in the Premier League well a team has been relegated from the championship in the Steel City Derby Sheffield United beat Sheffield Wednesday 2-1 and Wednesday become the first team to be relegated from the Football League in February this is obviously in part due to their 18 points deduction since they went into administration in October so I mean look everybody knew this was coming it's such a shit show at Sheffield Wednesday we all feel very sorry for their fans but if things couldn't get worse to be relegated by your city rivals as well

39:37Luke: It's bad The only people who've done anything for Sheffield Wednesday outside of their fans and some of the players who've covered themselves in glory by doing a decent thing is Portsmouth who of course let them win at Fratton Park and they're only winner of the season so rolled up to Fratton Park comprehensive win against the Arte despite their players not even being paid and so we did our bit I did it for free we did our bit we did our bit by giving them three points but sadly that's only three of the eleven they've got because it's the only win they've had this season look you can't because we're on the ramble there's definitely a part of me that wants to go oh man imagine getting relegated by your local rivals in that way but it's just honestly so depressing and the fans don't deserve it and it's an amazing club and I hope they bounce back so it's not a story that anyone can take any credit from it's really sad

40:27Vishay Bhakta: yeah the only other very predictable thing that happened in that game was that Calvin Phillips got sent off.

40:32Luke: In many ways, he is mirroring Sheffield Wednesday's decline with his own career. Can it get any worse for Calvin Phillips? Probably can.

40:41Vishay Bhakta: It could, but I hope it doesn't. I hope it only gets better from now on in, but I've said that a few times. So he'll be banned for a few games.

40:49Luke: He's the modern Danny Drinkwater. Yeah,

40:53Vishay Bhakta: that wasn't that long ago.

40:54Luke: No, it wasn't. That's how quickly they get turned out these days.

40:57Vishay Bhakta: Shorter generation spans. Well, we wish both men all the best. Now, coming up after this, Palace got a vital win and MLS is back underway.

41:18Vishay Bhakta: Hello, everybody. Crystal Palace 1, Wolverhampton Wanderers 0. Palace claim their first home win since November. The good times are back again. Let the good times roll, Vish.

41:27Luke: For the Premier League's most vibey club.

41:28Vishay Bhakta: yes Wolves were down to 10 men Palace got the winning goal in injury time just got to get it done though Mr. Penn as well didn't they Wolves they did it was saved by Dean Henderson England's number two good three but what? nothing good it was ultimately I say a good three but of course it was a good three but I haven't won at home since November but yeah just get it done lads but Glasner get the monkey off your back

41:56Marcus Speller: Glasner was visibly upset because it was something for Palace fans to enjoy. And his little turn at the moment is, fucking hates everything about Palace.

42:06Luke: Yeah, leave me alone. I don't want this job anymore. What are you doing scoring a heartwarming winner in the last minute? I want to be out of here. This is scuppering my chance of leaving.

42:15Marcus Speller: It was quite nice though. He did go over to the Travelling Wall support and apologise for that. He did. Very sorry for that. Did go how I wanted it to go.

42:22Vishay Bhakta: Before the game, Palace fans held up a banner. Some Palace fans, it was a little banner saying, opportunities missed bored inept fans disrespected Glasner finished

42:31Luke: a little banner it's a little one

42:33Vishay Bhakta: yeah it wasn't a huge one it wasn't like a big TIFO thing

42:35Luke: how big?

42:36Vishay Bhakta: is it a bed sheet? no no no okay mate okay no it was long wasn't it it was quite long I don't know I just feel like 20 people long I suppose that's quite big a banner I suppose to be

42:46Luke: get the plane over

42:48Vishay Bhakta: if you're going to do that

42:48Luke: I just feel like Marcus in your position in your exalted position in your ivory tower is the host of this legendary show

42:55Vishay Bhakta: yeah what a tower

42:56Luke: you perhaps diminish and trivialise Crystal Palace's a group of fans who were very abusive

43:02Vishay Bhakta: to the home fans at Craven College you just got to do a little bit of digging

43:07Luke: and it comes out by calling it a little banner

43:10Vishay Bhakta: a muggy little banner

43:11Luke: oh look at your little banner do you know who made that banner? Oliver Glasner

43:20Vishay Bhakta: he was like I insist you put Glasner's finish at the end Yeah, yeah. Oh, dear. They're 10 points clear of the relegation zone, though, after some worry among their fans.

43:31Marcus Speller: He's absolutely livid, isn't he?

43:32Luke: I was hearing, if Marcus is going to do wicked whispers from sources at Chelsea that aren't Rory Jennings, I'm going to do...

43:39Vishay Bhakta: What's your problem with Rory Jennings?

43:40Luke: I think his output is dreadful.

43:41Marcus Speller: What have you done? Yeah.

43:43Luke: What have you done? Don't. You don't need to do this. Marcus, we've been friends for a long time. I accept your judgment of him as a human being. I've never met him. I'm sure he's a life fella. He is. His output is appalling. Right. and I think it's only fair that we say that. Okay? Why is that only fair? Because that's my opinion.

43:58Marcus Speller: Let's not do this. That's my view.

44:00Luke: What I wanted to say was, he sets me off and I get in trouble for it. I'm the one who gets battered in the comments. Marcus gets away if it's Scott Free, smelling the roses. Here he goes again.

44:10Vishay Bhakta: Are you turning into Glaston?

44:12Luke: Yeah, get me out of here. I've always hated this show.

44:14Vishay Bhakta: No, you're right. I came across very badly.

44:19Luke: I was hearing a little Wicked Whisper myself that there's talk that old Crystal Palace might want to replace Oliver Glasner ASAP ASAP

44:28Vishay Bhakta: with Roy Hodgson Thomas Frank

44:31Luke: Tommy Frank

44:32Vishay Bhakta: I like that

44:33Luke: he's already living in the area don't look like

44:35Vishay Bhakta: someone's just passed Windvish Brentford are your guys as well

44:38Luke: you must have a bit of affiliation for Thomas Frank if you had a bit of moral fibre about it you'd be a Brentford fan no okay fine

44:46Vishay Bhakta: you do quite like Brentford

44:48Marcus Speller: no Glasner has to stay because we We have to watch how toxic this gets. Yeah. This is an important experiment.

44:56Vishay Bhakta: Yeah, yeah, fine. That's a point.

44:57Marcus Speller: He's legit. Palace fans, home ground, brilliant support, wonderful. We cheered away when they won the FA Cup. He, before this game, he was slacking off their fans for being entitled.

45:11Vishay Bhakta: Yeah.

45:12Marcus Speller: What an incredible thing.

45:13Vishay Bhakta: Up there in your little Bosnian cage.

45:16Marcus Speller: Oh, yeah. Exactly. They were literally in a cage. You know who else feels it? You know how good you have it?

45:25Luke: I've walked around Croydon. I'll see how you live. You know who else feels like he's in a cage? Me. A metaphorical cage at this job that I don't want anymore. He's going to go when they lose at home to Zrinski-Mostar this week, isn't he? Let's be fair.

45:40Marcus Speller: Zrinski-Mostar is going to get a last minute winner, and he's got a Mourinho knee slider in front of the fans.

45:45Luke: Straight out the tunnel. Onto a black cab. like the apprentice candidate who's been fired scarf around his neck Kustopas scarf now I'm glad all over the door slams off and I think a big

45:58Vishay Bhakta: massive eagle comes down and just takes him off at his challenge like Lord of the Rings it is like Lord of the Rings trust me I've seen the first two

46:05Marcus Speller: you missed a bit with the eagle oh I'm sure

46:07Luke: they have to get a new manager in place for when they go to Spurs and inevitably win and that is going to be that's going to be on the fifth of March

46:16Vishay Bhakta: and that's why Thomas Frank needs to get in there.

46:18Luke: Yeah. That would be, that's what I'm saying.

46:20Vishay Bhakta: If Frank turned up with Palace and battered them. Come on. Get behind that.

46:25Luke: No, not even battered them, just a proper without the ball shithouse performance. Are they playing

46:29Marcus Speller: at the top of the stadium? They will be, yeah. Right, so he could improve his record at that ground. Yeah, get another win. Class.

46:37Vishay Bhakta: It would be very important as well. Right, speaking of Brentford, as I think we did, they lost at home to Brighton and James Milner made his 654th Premier League appearance, breaking the competition's appearance record previously held by Gareth Barry. Luke hates this.

46:53Luke: No, I will acknowledge James Milner's achievement in the most neutral way possible and say that it is excellent what he's done. He's had a brilliant career and I've got nothing but admiration for James Milner, but I will not further contribute to the erasure of Gareth Barry's reputation with this endless statistic about appearances when Gareth Barry has played, I think, three or four seasons more minutes than Milner did.

47:14Vishay Bhakta: So should we be doing it on minutes, do you think, rather than appearances?

47:17Luke: I think it should be an asterisk to say, you know, Barry's record is more impressive. It feels churlish to say that in the week that Milne has broken the record, the record is legitimate. But the devil in this is in the detail, and I'd thank people to remember that.

47:32Vishay Bhakta: Well, thank you in advance for remembering that, everybody. Now then, let's go stateside.

47:40Luke: That's what Fizzer said to his wife when the job offer came in. Now then. He didn't say it. Let's go steakside. Now then, let's go steakside.

47:48Marcus Speller: You've been through this. I refuse to make you a celebratory cup of tea.

47:53Vishay Bhakta: The 2026 MLS season is underway, all in time for the 2026 World Cup. Future Manchester United man, Phil Neville's Portland Timbers.

48:03Luke: Past and future. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

48:05Vishay Bhakta: Started their campaign with a 3-2 win against Columbus Crew. Get on that, Vichy. in his pre-season presser Neville claimed that the city is in a much better place than it was three years ago he's the bloody mayor of Portland the way he's carrying on

48:20Luke: was he suggesting or implying that that was because of him I think we can all

48:24Vishay Bhakta: read between the lines yeah he's in his third and final year generally something

48:29Marcus Speller: something that Trump would say

48:30Luke: yeah it is yeah yeah

48:32Vishay Bhakta: I think he would go a bit further

48:33Luke: yeah he probably would yeah Fizzer

48:35Vishay Bhakta: well maybe yeah

48:36Luke: but look would Trump be like would Trump like wank his little mushroom on the beach like Fizz did?

48:41Vishay Bhakta: He would get someone else to do it.

48:42Luke: Probably would, yeah.

48:43Vishay Bhakta: Yeah, and I'm not going to delve into the profile of that person.

48:46Marcus Speller: Or which island it would have taken place on.

48:49Vishay Bhakta: I'll tell you what.

48:53Vishay Bhakta: Do you reckon...

48:53Marcus Speller: What's Fizz doing over there? Leave him. He's just on the... I'll tell you what. In fitting... Take a photo with him if you want. Do not shake his hand.

49:01Luke: Fizz is genuinely just there for a holiday. Genuinely. Do you think old Fizz got a mensch? Will he get a mensch, do you reckon? Ask Pete. Pete's been doing the control and effort of all the Epstein files. Has he got an El Mencho? No, I don't think so. I don't think he has.

49:13Vishay Bhakta: All right, okay. But he's in the final year

49:15Luke: of his contract, you were saying?

49:16Vishay Bhakta: He is, yeah. He's a gun for hire come the summer and after Potchbug is off, maybe, just maybe.

49:24Marcus Speller: Oh, wow. No, surely not. That would be incredible. A real vision there for a second. That would be amazing. That would be amazing. It'd be really funny. I would be all over it.

49:35Vishay Bhakta: what's good for your, what's good for the round may not be good for your country.

49:39Marcus Speller: Yeah. any country. Also, in the case of the USA, what's good for the Ramble may not be good for the world. True.

49:49Vishay Bhakta: Very true.

49:49Marcus Speller: The other side to this is... There's another side? Well, yeah, yeah, because I think the... The American Football Federation

50:00Marcus Speller: not passed the law, but they are having a vote on whether if you are national team coach, you need to spend at least eight months in the country. Well, tick. And they said that we didn't have to. Right So You know He could do a bit more Remote working couldn't he Clinsman was there for years Still there And that was the problem

50:19Vishay Bhakta: When he managed South Korea He didn't leave Oh dear The best thing to come out

50:24Luke: Of MLS this weekend Was big Johnny Barnes

50:26Vishay Bhakta: John Barnes was there He fired the San Jose Earthquake siren Before their match Have you seen the video of it It's brilliant

50:32Luke: It goes on for way too long Yeah It becomes uncomfortable Come on John

50:36Vishay Bhakta: That's enough

50:36Luke: He's maintaining too much Eye contact while he's doing it It's just like that

50:40Vishay Bhakta: he's really happy how you do the siren is you've got to hold and give to do it at the right time yeah and I think he went a bit over that time

50:47Luke: it's the second best video of John Barnes the first of course being him and Jason McAteer loading a bike into the back of a car when they got fired at Celtic

50:54Vishay Bhakta: oh I don't remember I remember oh it's brilliant

50:56Luke: the Sky Sports news reporter is reporting from the from the the training ground car park at Celtic and talking about Barnes and McAteer two of the worst managers admittedly to Wilford Nolsey at Celtic Oh, lest we forget. While he's announcing they've been fired, they're both trying to, like the Chuckle Brothers, load a bike into the back of an estate car.

51:15Vishay Bhakta: Yeah. Were they stealing it? No, I think it was McAteer's bike. Come on, we might as well get something from this.

51:21Luke: I've been fired. I can't cycle home. It's demeaning. All right, put your bike in the back of the car. It won't fit. To me, to you. That is superb. Yeah, yeah.

51:28Vishay Bhakta: Oh, dear. Do we have time to mention Heung-Min Son's LAFC beating into Miami 3-0? We have time to mention

51:34Luke: that he could absolutely walk into the current Spurs side on his hands if he wanted to still. in any position.

51:39Vishay Bhakta: I know, madness, isn't it? Apparently Lionel Messi tried to confront the referees in their changing room after the game and was restrained by voice of reason, Luis Suarez. You know, you've got, that's a full head loss, isn't it? Here we are.

51:50Luke: Suarez is talking you down off the ledge. Fish, what do you think of that?

51:55Marcus Speller: Yeah, I mean, that's, what's his, what's his bodyguard doing at this point?

52:00Luke: Yeah, I don't know. That's true.

52:02Marcus Speller: I don't do after the game. I do 90 minutes and that's it. And I'll run as fast as I can in trainers when I need to.

52:07Vishay Bhakta: If that referee goes for you, then I'll get involved

52:08Marcus Speller: what's it funny you got getting it rubbed out yeah exactly getting his warm down yeah

52:13Vishay Bhakta: maybe that was what it was so yeah ugly scenes one might say yeah I mean the sooner that

52:19Marcus Speller: sideshow is over the better I was going to say good luck to Messi but honestly just fuck off

52:24Luke: it's après moi le deluge isn't it where should he go to Saudi get him into Saudi

52:28Marcus Speller: yeah fine at least you can yeah whatever get what you want from what remains of an incredible playing career you've been but stop he's been stop turning that stuff stop turning that stuff into a sideshow no one cares yeah

52:42Luke: that's what Luis Suarez was saying to him I'm just worried if he continues confronting referees in MLS changing rooms it might destroy his reputation as a player people might start to really worry about it what a sad end I don't mind but it's

52:54Marcus Speller: yeah if Suarez is like look mate leave it go on I'd love you to have

52:58Vishay Bhakta: a revisionist view of Messi's career well actually there were some games well you know

53:01Marcus Speller: Ronaldo was right about it Ronaldo was just getting head down going on strike in San Diego there's an honesty to it yeah

53:07Luke: At least Ronaldo's on strike for football reasons. They're specifically his own football reasons, but they are football reasons, right?

53:15Vishay Bhakta: Oh, dearie me. Well, that means one thing, everybody. It's the end of the show. And what a show it's been, if I may say. And I thank you for listening to it. How much would you give it out of 10? Oh, I do... What was your favourite bit? The bits that I... The Rory Jennings bit.

53:29Luke: Is that your favourite bit? Well, I'm going to ask you... Do you wish he was here? I'm saying this at the end to make sure they don't edit it out. Oh, don't you worry about that.

53:35Vishay Bhakta: There are ways of cutting around things. But I want to say thank you to everybody for listening to the Football Ramble, part of the ACAST Creator Network. We'll be back tomorrow for the mailbag where we're going to be talking about all sorts of beefy footballing topics. And we're going to get the topics right, we hope, for Daniel Farker's sake.

53:54Luke: We've got a question here from someone called Stephen Hawkins Football Boots. Unbelievable. Look forward to that.

54:00Vishay Bhakta: Yeah, back tomorrow. Thank you very much, Luke Moore. Thanks. Thank you very much for doing the hand for Raja. Thank you. Thank you, Oliver Glassman.