Chippy Slot

0:00Like more Salah, Vish is back! Vish is on the pod! I repeat, Vish is on the pod! Welcome to Football Ramble! It's Thursday, 22nd of January. I'm Pete Donaldson. I'm Jim Campbell. And I'm Voduchin Arantaraja. Yes!

0:24Vish is on the pod. Vish is on the pod. Vish is on the pod. Vish is on the pod. Vish! Welcome home. Yay. Hey, mate. Welcome home. How are you feeling? I'm feeling good. You went for vishes instead of vishes on the pod I don't mind that I like it Did you have a good time? In the grand scheme of things I missed two months of shit weather For shit cricket Probably a deal I'd make ten times out of ten It's been quite a weird couple of months I'm just saying to you off mic About how disconnected I felt from general footballness In England But also at the same time like I would find myself going to bed in Australia and people from home messaging me being like what the fuck are England up to and then I'd wake up the next morning in Australia to messages from people again from home being like have you seen what Manchester United are up to and it's like the idea of following two different teams across different hemispheres and like you kind of hope for some yin and yang but then it's just been two months of being yang to fuck sort of I mean with Man United it's sort of inescapable isn't it wherever you are in the world I'm sure there are astronauts on the ISS getting bantered about Man United there's obviously you've not had an opportunity to sort of sum up Manchester United in a couple of words but how do you feel about it all?

1:46well I mean I suggested when we were discussing the running order for this show that we should maybe have a look back you know four days on about how people are but generally that was the first game because I was even in the air for the fucking FA Cup shitstorm so it was only like since I've been back in the country new manager you know smashing Man City so it's been a good time Man City are back they are occasionally back aren't they and this is one of those times it was an incredible game though it was so enjoyable and it really did feel like vintage Man United so you've got to enjoy the wins where you can and that was absolutely a brilliant one I know you're scared Jim I can hear it in your voice well this is going to be a show dedicated to the Champions League apologies brilliant so yeah in the deuxième ville Liverpool hosted Marseille 3-0 they pretty much took them apart to take their unbeaten streak in all competitions to 13 games I mean have that Marseille make me stand in piss will you for an hour and nearly get tear gassed yeah of course I forgot about this is a sort of revenge mission for you in a way in a way was that during a football game or was it just out of the street just popped out just popped to Marseille they were okay Jim I'm not going to say they were you know scintillating they were quite leaky at the back but they they didn't sit in deep and they really went at Marseille should this be how Liverpool play in the league?

3:13Yeah I mean I thought the Champions League is often quite different from the Premier League isn't it? Because you almost never get the kind of low block bullshit that you come up against all the time although Chelsea had to deal with it and dealt with it very well eventually so the games are a little bit more open aren't they? Which is I suppose is one of the kind of positives for this format I know we're still getting to grips to it and there are flaws with it and not everybody loves it compared to the group stages that we've left behind but I think there is an argument I think that games are a bit more open because of it and I think Liverpool took advantage of that really well loves Sir Bozlai's goal that is such a cheeky bastard of a free kick well it just doesn't happen anymore because people have the little draft city down boys don't they did you see or did you hear rather Steven Gerrard referred to it as a sleeper a sleeper is that how he As in the draft excluder.

4:01Yeah, because there was no sleeper. So he was like, well, they can, you know, he had the option to put it through. He's allowed to nail it though. Oi, you, nap time. Get over there. Love that. Yeah, as they're setting up the wall, someone's being rocked to sleep. A lot of footballers do have problems with sleeping pills as well. So they're probably bangled for it. Don't mention that here. What do you mean? Sleepers. You're talking about sleepers. I mean, Traore should have equalised it at 1-0. but I mean it was really really good from Liverpool going forward yeah I think so and I think the scoreline was reflective actually of how good they were Mo Salah missed a chance late on didn't he which is interesting he hit that like one of us he did yeah that was what was confusing about it it was very wrong button on international superstar soccer wasn't it yeah you've done a through ball there yeah exactly yeah exactly that yeah it was like one of the aliens from Space Jam had just taken all his powers and he just didn't have control of his body.

4:58He like toe punted it wide of the near post. But it's good for us because we can just get the agenda going again. Yeah, it's true. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mano would have finished that. But he sort of, I mean, obviously he started the match. Would he have wanted that after a full AFCON, kind of full AFCON schedule? I don't know. He kicks off when he doesn't start. That's the point actually, yeah. I also think an away game in the Champions League is the perfect kind of game that's kind of in enough of a spotlight, but not in England to make this just a kind of non-story now. It's best for everybody, isn't it?

5:34That it just, they will pretend none of that ever happened. Just carry on, I think. I mean, so it's the longest unbeaten streak of any team in Europe's top five leagues at Liverpool have got. And you sort of think, well, that sounds good on paper. I mean, just one win in six. So a lot of Liverpool fans are getting on the back of the team, certainly on the back of slot for just playing some really dry football, really not very attacking, a lot of sideways passes and stuff. Do you see this as a stylistic problem with Liverpool, that they're just not going at teams enough? Or is this just a problem in the Premier League where a lot of teams just, as you said, set up a low block?

6:12I think there's a weird situation that none of us foresaw when we looked at the players they added. And we all spoke a lot about them kind of strengthening from a strong position already. but obviously there's been a situation where Mo Salah's output has changed and isn't as effective as it once was. And it's kind of led to a bit of incoherence, generally bringing these new players in. Now Florian Wirtz is starting to show... He looked very tidy at points. There was a little bit of footwork in the 18-yard box. Bloody hell. Yeah, even just outside it as well, when it got really congested, you were like, oh, how has he still got the ball there?

6:49Yeah, but it's led to a kind of... they have to play in quite a different way to get the best out of him. And there's been a lot of that. And I think it's actually led to a situation where Slot has needed to kind of stop the rot, make him a bit boring by his own admission. So they can sort of kind of re-find or re-forge an identity. It was really clear how Liverpool played and what they were about last season. And we thought there would be a continuation of that with some tweaks. But actually the tweaks ended up being quite massive changes and they're still figuring out how to get the best out of the squad they have now.

7:19So, yeah, I think it makes sense. I think it's the right thing for Slott to do. They've got to kind of figure out how to get the best out of all this talent. And I'm sure they will do. But in the meantime, they've got to make sure they're picking up results, right? Well, there are a few teams, I mean, Man City accepted it with this week's performance, obviously, but who are having like quite a, like a slightly better time in the Champions League because teams need to go out, because of the nature of the football tournament. They need to come out and get something. And I think Liverpool sort of saw that last night that their team needed something.

7:50Yeah, yeah. and they had the wares to I suppose make the most of whatever gaps they were given like David Cartlidge spoke about this on on Wednesday didn't he about how like there's just the might of the Premier League is such that it shows in those kind of games where you play against a team like Marseille who are doing well domestically but they you know they get they get rolled over 3-0 by a Liverpool side who as you mentioned rightly like didn't really have to properly click into gear but I think the the thing I I did enjoy about this Liverpool performance as well as Verts was how someone like Sobberslai as well couldn't like flex a bit I mean like his touch for the third goal was obviously there was room to do it and stuff like that but I feel like in those moments and maybe like actually everyone who's played football has had a moment like this where you're like god I'm actually quite good and it's really interesting seeing like a flow state yeah 100 % yeah and it's really interesting seeing someone in a Champions League game get to experience that And I think he's someone who, I thought he was a bit of a luxury actually when he first signed for Liverpool.

8:56But I suppose the way he started this season amid all the disarray. And then also like, he just seems a bit more of a leader now. And I think the fact that he was able to, you know, show off a bit more when Verts came off as well, shows his dexterity like he does the hard stuff and does the fun stuff as well. Yeah, Frimpong looked good, I thought. Speaking of like, you know, reinforcements from a position of strength. like he provides a very different sort of right-sided footballer than Liverpool had for a long time yeah I think sometimes he looks quite rubbish right because I think he I really like him but I feel like whenever he takes on someone he needs a bit of a run-up which is no bad thing because obviously when he gets that as we saw with the with the second Liverpool goal as soon as he gets ahead of someone he also despite being small has the strength to hold someone off and get through is this like a self-hating short king thing I think it's a little bit yeah because he's got better skin than I do.

9:49He's got better hair. He's got better life than I do. So he's rubbish. He's going to remain in that team because he's Dutch. We all know how this works. I think he's a funny player, isn't he? Like he was brilliant against Arsenal, but his final ball was lacking a little bit and they probably would have won the game if he'd been a bit more decisive at that moment. But I think he's one of those players where with like a few kind of, a few kind of, yeah, positive tweaks, if you could put it like that, he could be absolutely devastating. But yeah, I mean, he forced the own goal, didn't he? Yeah. That doesn't happen without him.

10:18I think they've got a really tricky player there. So what you're saying is Salah out and just have a better time on him. Yeah, I mean, Slott seemed eager in his post-match. He didn't seem to want to talk about the football match that had just taken place. He seemed to want to talk mainly about how they could have won at Burnley at the weekend. I think he'd been waiting for a statement win. I kind of guess in Liverpool's kind of Malaysia, you would say this is a statement win. So he could get back to being Chippy Slott. and he's back being chippy slot. Chippy slot. Chippy slot. What I call my mouth on fish fryers.

10:52Yes. Chippy slot. That's where the chips go. But I mean, he was really, you know, he was full vinegar slot, which I'm hungry. You're just thinking about Friday, aren't you? Oily, crispy, vinegary slot. Yeah. He looks like a pickled onion as well. Maybe more a pickled egg. It's a pickled egg. Very, very smooth. Yeah. But yeah, he's back to his kind of like best of like being a bit I'm the best you're rubbish kind of vibes yeah I think the undeserved completely undeserved at this moment in time as well I didn't see this press conference it sounds fascinating yeah like he went full WWE it's funny isn't it because with with managers who play in domestic managers who play in Europe they have basically four or five press conferences a week yeah and they have to be strategic about how they use them so he's obviously going to do another press conference ahead of their game on the weekend yeah and he obviously would want to talk about something else so he's like right I might as well just get this whatever this Burnley chat is out the way or whatever's in my head get it out there right okay I didn't get it out of the way almost kind of like chum in the water for give them something to do for another couple of days them being like media and fans or whatever but yeah it did seem a bit out of place after this particular win but then I mean it was it was quite an academic win wasn't it I did enjoy bits of how Marseille played but as you listen they're a very counter-attacking side They're good to watch If you're like Fucking go off They're very They're very deserve-y right Yeah Exactly what you'd expect from him I think like In the first 10 minutes When Like you know Benjamin Pavard Was Breaking into Liverpool's box I think he did that twice In those first 10 minutes It's really exciting But then I reckon If you're Kind of like A sensible Liverpool fan You're looking at it being like Yeah keep coming mate Yeah Keep throwing your centre back Into the box If you want to In open play Let's see how that works out for you Yeah And I mean when I went to see Mars in Newcastle I mean the thing that kind of knocked out is the volume from the home fans I mean they're such an incredible support they unveiled a massive TIFO of the Beatles yeah that was amazing wasn't it it looked absolutely incredible we are really behind in our TIFO game in this country yeah Newcastle do their best with war flags but I mean there's very few clubs that will allow the wires up to the top of the stadium and I think that needs to change we need the sort of I mean you do miss the first five minutes and the match which is annoying you are in a big net but the Tifo game is better so it's you know swings and roundabouts yeah it was a big Beatles one wasn't it and I think they were reading a headline about history repeating from Marseille having beaten Liverpool in the then UEFA cup I think so it's quite niche long after John Mayer dies if you are sat in that Liverpool away and you're looking at that thinking I think this is a dig but I'm going to have to do some research can I get on the wifi how many of the Beatles are dead one two who's the second one Harrison.

13:44George Harrison, yeah. Right, and he played the guitar. He did. Cool. Right. You know music. Yeah. I'm trying to think of some Australian bands that... Yeah, Men at Work. Is there an Oasis kind of band called Flap? The Veronicas. The Veronicas. Yeah. The Flowers. I went to see them once, and they were basically like a Cod Oasis act from Down Under, and it was like Sunflower or Madflower. Madflower? Is that a thing? I don't know. Game in Parlours, Australian? Yes. Sounds about right. Yeah, all right. fine yeah Crardhouse wrong island fine yeah Grinspoon there you go Grinspoon that is a deep cut alternative nice basically what I'm trying to ask today is two out of the four people on that Tifo are dead yeah Matthew Flamini's in it as well so there are some people in the Beatles yeah he was in the Beatles Tifo which is more in the Beatles than I am to be fair to him but less than the drummer left there was a picture of him on the paper the Beatles were reading which is just confusing so the Beatles have travelled forward in time to watch Marseille knock out Liverpool and they're now referencing that in a TIFO yeah but they had to do a seance for the two people who were dead one of them was shot yes stabbed one was shot one was stabbed and not by his Japanese wife she's not to blame for any of this terrible music but she's not to blame for any of this did you see that Liverpool jumped to fifth in the global football rich list oh the back of this win Yeah I told you Statement win They sold a lot of merch For the pocketbook Just topped them up Yeah Apparently it's down to A lot of their Dua Lipa and Taylor Swift gigs Apparently That's not even anything To do with the football But yeah No Premier League side In the top five For the first time In 30 years Man City dropped from Second to sixth And Manchester United Fell from fifth to eighth So there we go And speaking of cash Before we go to a break Man City's players Have raised£9 ,000 To refund I mean raised Come on in the glove compartment of every Maserati do they have glove compartments?

15:48I imagine that's too gorsh for a Maserati do you have a lot of storage in a Maserati? it needs something to keep your cocaine in exactly they're going to be refunding the 374 fans who followed them to Bordeaux Glimpt on Tuesday night yeah but only for the match tickets which are, let's be honest the cheapest thing about it in Norway exactly, are they going to be giving them the percentage they lost on the money exchange at Marks and Spencer's before they went. To be fair, it's probably deductible on the balance sheet, isn't it? Yeah. I reckon so, yeah. It's a win in a way. I mean, 374 fans for like an ever-present title team.

16:26Yeah, but have you seen the size of Bode Glimpse Stadium? Like, literally, one end of it is just the backs of people's flats. Yeah, but you would still have more than 374 spaces for people to attend. Do you know who the top... I'm sure that would have sold out. actually it's a tiny stadium no but like they're not giving away 374 places are they they'd get like 2 ,000 places won't they won't they I'd be amazed alright well do you know I looked at the attendance table for Premier League teams Man United and West Ham top it I know they've got bigger stadiums I know they've got the space and the capacity but West Ham was a bit of a surprise the absolute toilet they've been serving for a little while presumably that wasn't a count taken at full time no exactly so it's an 8 ,000 capacity stadium for Birda Glimp So you're going to be giving away more than 374 tickets Well no, because they really like Throw it open to the locals To come in and see teams like Man City for example So yeah I just wanted a way of digging Man City out Alright Vish, I'm giving you this golden opportunity You won't even go to the Arctic Circle You fucking lame-os Nothing going on up there Nothing going on up there Yes, coming up after this The Josie Mourinho soap opera continues

17:47So sorry about the... I hadn't pressed the button. I went away for a job at half-time. Excuse my term of language and stuff. A wee bit of poop. Welcome back to the football ramble. Vish, do the toilets go anti-clockwise? No, they don't, but the people are backwards. Right. Good. Do you bring back any racist chocolates, speaking of which? they do do good racist chocolate they do I love please I'm not I'm joking Australians are you need a visa you need the visa are lovely I did actually love Australia I would say about the racism on Australia at least it happened to your face again and not behind your back as it sometimes happens over here good and terrible elsewhere in Newcastle Newcastle 3 PSV 0 Newcastle United securing a Champions League playoff place following a pretty decent battering of PSV Eindhoven.

18:43He's beat Liverpool. I don't know what the hell's going on here. This was a great display from Newcastle. This must have been enjoyable in Casa Donaldson. I mean, I think it was lovely to see a team really go at us and then therefore enjoy the spoils of a really chaotic back line. I mean, they were deciding to sort of play out from the back against a team that decided to press because they'd clearly been watching them. and we've got Pace merchants in the side and yeah, they played really well and it was, you know, Whistle was working really hard and he does remind me of Andy Cole. I don't know, like the way that he's sort of, he's just so industrious and you do get the sense that a few more matches, Whistle will get the measure of God and players like Murphy and stuff like that because he did appear to have a semi on when he scored so that's gone on a tick as well.

19:35worth hunting out that picture. Yeah, I definitely not play. It's not worth hunting out that picture. He wanted to move to Newcastle because he wanted to play in the Champions League and he was quite emotional about sort of playing. Well, evidently, yeah. I never think to look for those. So maybe it happens all the time. Maybe it does happen all the time, yeah. And congratulate. Was it his first Champions League goal? I think so, yeah. He clearly enjoyed it. Just point to it. Tell us a bit more about that. Flick it. but um yeah his um his celebration was very like oh you know obviously like quite statuesque and composed but like the fact that he scuffed the finish it was clearly rightly so happy and so excited about it yeah i think that kind of um characterized his entire performance because it was quite like last minute just lashing things it's probably nuisance value wasn't it it was yeah he looked really really busy and stuff and yeah they played really well because they were playing this was your high line at sort of half time I sort of texted Charlie and said like they've got to get a Langeron because that man is low on confidence his team are playing a really high line and he's a Piers merchant so yeah they were not having a great evening at PSV and Newcastle are in there Newcastle are in the blooming playoffs yeah I was really impressed with Jalinton's pass to Wisser for the first go actually that sort of sideways chopped pass it's really difficult to do that especially with someone on you and Wisser himself as you know as I just said the nuisance value for Gordon's goal.

21:03That all came from him. And I was surprised to see that that was Gordon's sixth goal and Harvey Barnes got his fifth in the Champions League. The pair of them absolutely loving it. Just having a brilliant time there. Yeah, I mean, Gordon's, I guess, because he takes all the penalties. But he's, yeah, he's looked like a different player. And to be fair, last couple of matches, he's looked a little bit better. So hopefully, second half of the season, he'll sort of pick up the form a little bit. I mean, it was, you know, it was a pretty just solid performance. There's not much to say about the match, really.

21:31The PSV just sort of laid down and they were pretty terrible. The spate of goals conceded from giving the ball away by trying to play out the back, I feel like it's getting worse and worse. Yeah. Because the defender for the PSV one, when this kind of hooks it for Gordon, he couldn't have given less of a shit. It was almost like, oh, you know, this does happen. It's like, well, it shouldn't happen, though. It should not happen. You're meant to be annoyed when it does happen. Oh, you know what they say. What do they say? Why do they say that? Eddie Howe said that it was the best individual performances from a lot of the players for a while.

22:09You'd probably agree with that, most of it. He's been a little bit under pressure to play slightly more expansive football, to come up with some sort of plan to defeat teams or just lay a glove on teams that set up a lower block. But I think a lot of teams are having that problem in the Premier League, Jim. Yeah, it seems to be the way, doesn't it? and actually that's why the Champions League has been so refreshing in this kind of round of games because we've all seen people just kind of essentially with a bit more space, right? And it's just really enjoyable to watch. So I think those little slugs who support the pointless teams at the bottom end of the Premier League need to just roll over personally.

22:54It was also like the teams from, you know, around Europe who are in the Champions League. I feel like they're characters in a movie or like side characters in a movie because they're only relevant when they play us when they come up with one of our teams Is that fair? Is that right? Yeah they're like NPCs basically aren't they? Yeah It's like oh they're doing really well in their league they have their own little backstory and it's nice for like the cinematic universe and for anyone I've got a ticket for PSG next week can you shut the fuck up? It's great for fan fiction isn't it? Yeah I wonder what Elfsborg do in their spare time You can just make up little things and stuff.

23:30It's really nice. What you're saying is disgusting. Oh, they press really well. You're joking. Kieran Trippier gave Lewis Miley the captain's armband, which I think it's fair to say the crowd absolutely loved him. It's performative bullshit. And he had it in the sense of mind, did he? He didn't mind. Yeah, I mean, it's quite sweet. I think he's been really quite an interesting person to follow, isn't he, in terms of like the evolution of Newcastle, because he obviously has that start a couple of seasons ago where he, because of injuries, has to get more game time and then basically disappears for a little bit.

24:03Works on his physique. Yeah. He's become filling out. Filling out his coat hanger frame. Still got a boy's head. I mean, it's how said about Kieran Trippi giving young Lewis Smiley the captain's armband. He said it was unscripted. It was unplanned. It just sounds like a bad stand-up set, doesn't it? typical Kieran thinking of other people what about Kieran Trippier he's scripted I want to know about that exactly yeah I know Kieran's got like one foot out of the club but I'm really going to miss him he's been a brilliant player for Newcastle I can't think of many other footballers who have been as transformative as Kieran Trippier especially when it seemed at the time that he'd probably come for a season or two didn't it he's been there a good while and has been a really important figure in terms of them kind of lifting themselves to the level they are essentially at now yeah I mean And it reminded everyone that there is a level above the slop that had been sort of served up and the way that he kind of almost took control of the club in a really, really poor...

25:01You know, help him stop getting relegated, etc. He was... And just his ball delivery for a good two seasons was just absolutely amazing. He created almost single-handedly the platform that Newcastle took to that first Carabao Cup final. And the Saudis, obviously. And the Saudis, yeah. Let's make it very clear. he wouldn't be there if the Saudis weren't there. And speaking of unlikely and let's face it, unwelcome takeovers, PSV fans took over a Pop World before the game. Lovely stuff. Lovely stuff. I didn't realise Pop World was open before the hours of 11pm. Yeah, it's very much a kind of like, I'm not going to a nightclub, I'm going to a Pop World, which is still technically a bar.

25:44And it's usually the, oh, I mean, if it's the only place that's open. Yeah. It's the only place serving aftershocks and duallys. Is there any news on this? Is the siege ongoing? Is the siege of the Pop World ongoing? Are they still there? They've got squatter's rights. Well, PSV fans took over a Pop World, to me, suggests that they barricaded the doors. They're not going anywhere. Setting fire like an oil drum. Well, I mean... Well, it's Sambuca. Well, I mean... I mean, I would say that Pop World historically have taken over ailing wine bars, the length and breadth of the town. Has there ever been a more transformative nightclub than Pop World?

26:24No, that's a good point. I do think if I still see a Pop World, there's not one in Leicester, and I always think this place could do with a Pop World. Is it like the blue group and the city group where Pop World just have their own tendrils and they take bar staff from other places, moving around and DJs and whatnot? Also, is Pop World based on the show that was on Channel 4? I thought it was, but it can't be. But I feel like the font is the same, is it not? oh maybe it is that is an odd bit of synergy but who knows yeah I remember they made a magazine that ran for two episodes yeah Pop World I remember we got the launch a magazine that ran for two episodes two episodes I went to the there's your first mistake I went to like a who's that dirty the Raymond Review Bar they did the launch at Raymond Review Bar and it was the long forgotten second hosts of Pop World Alexa Chung and Alex Zane that were doing it and it was a good night it was a good night good cocktails but it only ran for two episodes I think but the yeah Pop World I feel like it might have started like that yeah I feel like that I feel like it's linked to the show slash magazine but look I am a big Pop World fan it is a place to go it's horrible after the pubs are finished but it's you gotta remember we've got Pop World in Hartlepool and it used to be the only place you would go is Loons where you'd have like a DJ Loons Loons constantly playing the song Hey baby Ooh Pop World doesn't do any of that They play the Spice Girls They also play that as well But with other stuff Yeah They don't have a DJ That talks over the top of everyone Like you know Lambasting people For fingering Anyway Elsewhere In the Champions League Chelsea Lovely throwback that Fingering Chelsea won In public Chelsea won Fingered Paphos A call to the good Liam Rossini got his first win In the Champions League his Champions League debut, if you will.

28:19And it was really unconvincing stuff, wasn't it? Well, again, it was the low block thing. The low block. Because Paphos would have been delighted with a point in this situation. So they've chucked everyone behind the ball. They've done a pretty good job of it as well, to be honest. They frustrated Chelsea for a long time. Chelsea really had to work for it. Liam De Lappe touched the ball 12 times in 69 minutes or something. Yeah, he had a goal disallowed, didn't he? But it doesn't count, so it doesn't matter. Does that count as a touch? does that count as a touch that's a good question I don't know get back to us on that one boffins boffins yeah I thought obviously Kaysaido gets the winner with a header in the end but he had a lot of shots in that game and I'm always really impressed by his technique when he shoots we see him as a defensive player but I think given the quality he's got I wouldn't be surprised if he kind of starts adding more goals to his game sooner rather than later just because of the quality with which he hits the ball I think Chelsea should have had a penalty as well for a handball at one point but yeah I don't think they were ever really in any danger of losing this game.

29:18I guess it leaves the English clubs in an interesting position, doesn't it? Because there are four of them in the top eight at the moment. Man City are 11th at the moment. But it's so tight because of the nature of this new format. It's still quite hard to call what happens. Because if anybody slips up, there are so many teams behind you on a similar amount of points that you can drop quite far down. So that final day is going to be really, really interesting. I mean, without Parma and Esteval, those kind of players like Chelsea look very thin on creativity, don't they? Yeah, they do. But again, though, I think, you know, this is the sort of game where Caicedo can step up and do that.

29:59And Enzo Fernandes has got a surprising amount of goals this season as well. But he's someone that you see as maybe more industrious than being someone who's going to kind of get you over the line. But yeah, I mean, Parma's having a funny old time, isn't he? He's not quite managed to be on the field enough this season. so that's been a big big miss for them I imagine that like Liam put him straight back in I mean he sort of needs that creativity doesn't he on Kosedo Jim on becoming one of the leaders of the squad can you be a leader in a Chelsea squad because at any moment you could be bombed out and sold I mean there's no one's everyone's for sale in that squad I think he's one of the untouchables though isn't he Kosedo yeah and also like you know how long do you have to be there to be a senior player probably about 18 months yeah and they've got a really kind of young average age haven't they yeah fair he said so there's a chance for Lewis Miley that's what he said he said Cassidy said a lot of people tell me I'm a leader I don't talk too much in the dressing room but I do like to show on the pitch and in training which actually probably matters more in a dressing room where the state of flux is so great that you probably don't build up enough kind of cachet as a great orator or someone who you know is able to like boss people around because you don't really know who you're going to look up with you know the following season but and the manager needs more time talking to his squad in the dressing room anyway because they just don't have enough time with the players anyway.

31:20Yeah, and the players don't have enough time with that same manager. It's like a sort of dystopian YA novel, isn't it? It's like the 100 Games. You are 24, but you've got to lead this whole thing and anyone can go at any point. Don't get too attached to anyone. Did you say that David Lewis didn't get a run out on his return to Stamford Bridge? That's a shame, yeah. Can you see an absence of a run out? I guess that's really bad English from me but you know what I mean if it's David Luiz you can yeah his presence yeah he gave a signed shirt to long serving staff member Brian Pullman not the wrestler Brian Pillman who has been welcoming the media different name for a start he's been welcoming the media to Stamford Bridge for more than 56 years it was a I'm loving a bit of the old chaps getting a bit of love this week at Chelsea did you see that the comedy masseur I forget his name but he was walking around with a stupid sticker on his head yes and Sky got about 10 minutes out on a Sloan used there.

32:13What was it about? Always connected. Always connected. What was it referenced to? Yeah, I don't know what it was referenced to, so maybe it's a private joke. He just found a sticker on some product, some kind of piece of electronics, I think, and just stuck it on his head. Is that it? Is that all it takes now? Either it's a parody of the type of management speak that Liam Rossini keeps getting rinsed for, or it's an example of it. Who knows? So I thought it was either related to that or Brooklyn Beckham. Right. Always connected. yeah I don't know if he's having a dig at Brooklyn Beckham that's funny you're gonna need more work with that one aren't you I suppose did you see the the Paphos manager was asked about about Brooklyn Beckham and he said I don't know what you're talking about yeah well it was Gary Cottrell wasn't it Gary would like just wheel out the clown and see what he can get yeah what would your parents think of you Gary Cottrell he would have got that's really harsh he would have he didn't mean that you've come back all guns blazing goodness yeah geez I mean I think more than anything else he got confused by the word saga.

33:12So Cottrell's seen himself off there. He could have got a soundbag, but he insisted on using the word saga. But it gave enough pause for the press guy next to the power force manager to go, just don't answer that. Just don't answer that. Do not answer this. It's nothing to do with us. Exactly. What else were in the Champions League? Last night, Jim Carmel's Eintracht Frankfurt was knocked out of the Champions League after losing a five-goal thriller to Azerbaijani club Carabag. Carabag hadn't played a competitive game since before Christmas. Jim, thoughts? They went two and up in the 77th minute, Frankfurt, and they lost in the dying seconds, because that is what they're about.

33:48They are an absolute rollercoaster. Chaos club, yeah. Belou Mustafzada became the first Azerbaijani player to score in the competition with the last kick. Almost guaranteeing them a place in the playoffs. I mean, it does not get any better than that. It's romantic. Well done, Frankfurt. Yeah, exactly. Should we go and watch them? Yes. Yeah, all right. Cool. I think we should. Pete and I looked into maybe spending a weekend away watching football just even for like just two days two nights or something like that but I'm kind of all in you've turned me on to Frankfurt I mean they've fired Dino Tottmuller now so in theory it might get better but evidently it might also take a little while so yeah we'll see let's do it it's Antoine Frankfurt where I went to the football museum I think it is isn't it it's your memory mate you tell me does that sound about right it was Dortmund it was Dortmund that Rory does Does that sound about right?

34:37I don't think I've ever been to Frankfurt. Anyway, there'll be pictures of me in Frankfurt popping up online, I don't know. Yeah, Benfica lost 2-0 to Juventus last night. Jose Mourinho appeared to him a dig at Real Madrid manager Alvaro Arbeloa in the pre-match, basically saying that people who have done nothing coach the biggest teams. Obviously, Jose Mourinho is linked to the Real Madrid job. I mean, it's big licks, isn't it? It's big licks. This to me feels like it's somehow still a dig at Pep Guardiola. he should never have got that job in the first place he'd done nothing and he's done nothing since he also was asked about Juventus a lot before this game obviously and he was talking about how he'd managed against them before many times and sort of within this kind of chat about inexperienced managers getting big jobs he was asked by someone in the press if Juventus called him and offered him the job would he manage them and he said of course you're managing their opponent I know right what are you doing yeah and he said about the Real Madrid job he said don't count on me for soap operas.

35:35Come on. There are good soap operas, but they're very long. You miss one or two episodes and then you lose track. Don't count on me because I don't watch soap operas.

35:46What do you watch from your racing car bed in a Lisbon condo? More of a hotel guy though, isn't he? Yeah, loves a hotel. I think we should get behind this. I think Mourinho being Real Madrid manager is fun. Yes, absolutely. Oh yeah, that's definitely our vibe. I completely agree. All right, well, coming up after this, we're going to talk about Ruben Loftus' cheek. Shh, don't tell Marcus.

36:18Yes, in Europe tonight, Fenerbahce versus Aston Villa. It's a lovely quarter to six of ish. Yeah, good. I like it. Very enjoyable. It's almost like European football matinee, isn't it? Yes. Yes, it's a lovely stuff. to the proper fixtures at seven and eight. Yeah. Villa of Hell Talks over a move for Jean-Philippe Mateta. I like it. I like it. I think it makes, it does make sense. They have quite an underrated handsome team, Villa as well. He's only going to add to, especially like there's Ruben Loftus cheek chat as well. Yeah, the cheek chat. Ruben Loftus cheekbones. Why have we never said that before?

36:53Yeah, that's true. Yeah. I think he would be the most complete striker they've had since someone else? Because, you know, there are obviously things with Watkins games. Dwight York. How good was he? Because there have obviously been things that Watkins is exceptionally good at, but I quite think he has the touch to really, you know, bring in the kind of attacking players around him. I think he's good at stretching play and stuff like that. Maybe John Duran would have turned into that, but it was like, you know, so brief, I suppose. I think Watkins has had that in his game fairly recently though, hasn't he?

37:32He got a lot of assists last season. He's having a funny season. But I think he's someone who like, when he's hot, it's working perfectly. But he needs to be 8.5 out of 10 all the time to be in that. Also, I mean, Evan Gassand has kind of been a bit of a kind of hot and cold signing. And seemed a little bit out of place in the way they play. Whereas, you know, even if Watkins is firing on all cylinders, there needs to be another option. and Mateta or Watkins is really really strong yeah I feel like Mateta brings in so many other players as well considering what Villa have in midfield I feel like you get someone like Mateta and you play him and suddenly the other things start to work themselves out yeah and on the Ruben Loftus streak bonds I mean it's I mean Kamara's out because they need reinforcement in that area that is a massive massive miss he's been absolutely superb for them but they haven't got the funds but they just can't spend the funds at Aston Villa so I mean they're in a situation where they are just going to be rinsing the lawn market as best they can but for a lawn player not a bad position to be in I suppose Yeah I suppose in a sort of emergency sense as well he's a good player he's obviously got Premier League experience and he's slotting into a team that are confident they're doing well they've had the strange situation of Daniel Marlon going to Roma and Leon Bailey coming back as well which is a lot of odd kind of shuffling because they're quite up against it in terms of finances there but yeah I can't say that I've watched AC Milan too closely recently, so I don't really know what to expect of Ruben Loftus-Cheek.

39:03But, you know, I like the thought of seeing him in the Premier League again. Yeah, completely agree. And I'm sure Marcus will as well, and we'll hear about him constantly. I think we have this sort of image... I can feel what he thinks about it. I think we have this image when... It's a bit like Johan Wisser. When British players go abroad, which is, you know, a new thing for us, let's face it. You know, it didn't happen, you know, 10 years ago. now it's starting to happen a bit more we are sort of like oh well he's obviously going to be a massive success because this is a step down for him and it's not always the case as we've seen when they return but we'll see how that one pans out the AFCON Fallout continues what a fucking shambolic end to that particular tournament that was yeah the president of Senegal has announced that each member of their AFCON winning squad will be awarded a plot of land on the country's coastline that's nice that's not Fallout is it?

39:50well this bit isn't Fallout I suppose Senegal is smaller than the UK right so obviously it has less coastline right so if England win the World Cup don't make me feel bad for human rights if England win the World Cup and Keir Starmer gives Jordan Pickford a beach I'll be like hang on that should be for all of us why are you giving the beaches away what are you doing he can have we will rave on the beaches we'll get the rave on the beaches there's a bit of past Southend Gunnersbury and stuff which I guess lives up to its name with the army and the navy on and just give them a bit of that I'd say really swampy bit of the estuary absolutely fine but every member of the squad I mean your point about being a small country highlights how silly this is but every member of the squad and the coaching staff yeah get 100 grand each and representatives as well Carabao Cups worth each yeah it's absolutely huge yeah each player will receive 75 million CFA francs which is around about 100 grand and a 1500 square metre plot of land on the Petit Côte a stretch of sandy beach in Mamoor on the west coast of the country they will also get loads of gifts and stuff bonuses, lands members of the Senegal Football Federation I just don't want to see people from the Football Federation be getting land and stuff you said that as if they were going to be gifted people from the Football Federation like a dowry well done exactly exactly Shall we take an email?

41:23Yeah, I've got one right here. We sometimes do that on a Thursday, don't we? We do. I've got one from Jack. He says, Hey, Ramblers. Love the pod. My wife and I recently went for a weekend away in Norfolk and visited an antique centre just outside of King's Lynn. Much to my surprise, attached to the antique centre was a beer and spirits hall. So I took a look around while my wife did a lap of the antique shop. Lovely little bit of window drinking there. I'm just going to go and look at some booze. In one of the liquor stands, I saw the attached. Two bottles of Aftershock, confirming it is still in circulation after you mentioned it on the podcast.

41:54I'm not sure how much to read into the fact that this was neighbouring mostly unwanted Victorian furniture, but I'll leave the gags for you guys. Love the new Arsenal pod, by the way, Jim. Helped with my sanity. Thank you very much, Jack. So yeah, he has attached a picture of two different flavours of aftershock, which I'm going to call red and blue. One's cool citrus and one's hot and cool cinnamon. Yeah, next to an unidentified spirit just called broadside which makes it sound like turns you into a nasty drunk and another thing yeah or it was made in like the kettle of a prison the um so I'm trying to work out like everything about this email but so is the liquor place attached to the antique centre as a way of showcasing old like antique booze that's what it suggests isn't it I feel that can't be the case because like antique booze is famously very, very expensive, right?

42:53So presumably we wouldn't be next to... Yeah. Although actually we don't know how fast the antique centre is. Maybe you get like a 600 quid bottle of wine in there. Who knows? But this vintage, it could be a vintage bottle of Aftershock, no? Yeah. Sorry, no. There's Aftershock there. We do know that you can't get 600 pound bottles of wine in there. It's a good point, yeah. Does Aftershock get better when it's... I don't know. Well, it won't get worse, will it? I imagine the sugar will just make it more alcoholic, I suppose. actually linking together I very much enjoy also like the emailer I enjoy two things booze and the thing about Arsenal your new podcast what's coming up on the show?

43:29we will be previewing the Man United game yes so probably lots of broadsides against fish I'd imagine now that he's back speaking about your new podcast and drink I when I was drunk DM'd the mayor of New York Zoramandani to say you should come on. Did you really? Yeah, I did. He's not responding. No. Onto which show? I hate what you've done to New York. I did that on that show. I just think he'd be a good guest. I don't think it's a bad show. He'd be brilliant. He likes his football. He does. He's done stuff with the hooligans, hasn't he? Exactly. I appreciate that, mate. He'll fill that home in London, Stan, wouldn't he?

44:14Yeah? What do you come over, mate? love what you do with the childcare do you want to come on my man's podcast cool or I just think about mouths to the sky yes where's your favourite pizza slice I'd like to apologise to the people of New York the people of Stack and producer Rory who is sad inside now yes thank you for listening to the football round why does he have access to that account by the way it's my account my own account fine on your head that's gone right in the spam folder I tell you what Thank you for listening to the Football Ramble, part of the Acast at a creator network. We're going to be back tomorrow for the preview show and the small matter of my biddy aunt.

45:03I accidentally brought me a Man of the Match statue in my bag because I went to put it in the car. I got it about November time for one match and I keep forgetting to take it to football so I've just kidnapped the man of the match yeah oh so there's been loads of other does it rotate yeah so I've not they've not had their little fucking thing wow so you are the man of the match so I've got it but I've got it I've just I've just brought my man of the match I've just brought my man of the match I have got a Nobel Peace Prize the Football Ramble is a Stack Production and part of the Acast Creator Network