Jürgen? Fancy it?

0:00Hello everybody, welcome to the Football Ramble. Arsenal got a statement win and Liverpool got another damning defeat. It's Thursday 27th November, I'm Marcus Spell. I'm Jim Campbell. And I am Pete Donaldson.

0:24Welcome, everybody, to a thrilling Thursday here at the Football Ramble. My goodness, goals galore in the Champions League last night, wasn't it? Everywhere you look, Peter, they were just flying in. It was hard to avoid them. You're just ducking. A goal was going in left, right and centre. Outside of the box, inside of the box. All flavours. Strawberry, banana, other yoghurts that I can remember. Kiwi. Kiwi yoghurt. That's absolutely foul. You've had a stinker there, Marcus. Hang on. Pete, you are saying that some strange sort of dairy product, slightly exotic fruit combination is weird. Yes, I am, actually.

1:05I've seen you eat out of a packet of mystery meat that a listener of Absolute Radio sent you from Thailand and you never knew what it was and you will never know what it was. No, and it made a lovely yoghurt. I'm sure you can find kiwi yogurts, but the point was that the lesser spotted kiwi yogurts, you know, with regard to your analogy with goals, there was all types of goals. I had one through my kitchen window. It's funny, nightmare. A yoghurt or a goal? Well, you don't live far away. Blimey, O 'Reilly. So, yeah, English clubs were involved. There was goals being scored for and against all of the English clubs.

1:45We're going to start. Where else? But with Liverpool 1, PSV Eindhoven 4. Blimey, O 'Reilly. I mean, the away end was rather pleased with itself. PSV's first win over an English side since 2008, and that was against Spurs in the Europa League. They've gone for a big one. They've gone for a big one. You can't say it. Yeah. They haven't gone for the big one. I feel, though, you know, as we are broadcasting from England, it's rather sort of unwise, perhaps, to try and dissect PSV, what they've been doing this season and so on and so forth. The story here is Liverpool. I mean, Jim, I would say to you that yesterday on the pod, I was gently and lovingly, one might say, putting forward the argument that PSV, at the top of the Eredivisie, they've been going very, very well.

2:38They might argue they've slightly underperformed in the Champions League this season, or they did hit six goals past Napoli. Not a bad side. And I thought, you know, Liverpool, there's the fear factor in the Liverpool camp rather than coming from it, if you see what I mean. PSV are going to turn up they're not going to be afraid and Liverpool kind of you know everyone thought right this is a chance it's a European night and six minutes into the game Virgil van Dijk gives away a needless penalty perhaps he was furious with the referee for punishing him for that wasn't he he was yeah it was pretty stormy wasn't it pretty standard stuff I mean the whole evening like I mean how do you can I just interject here to say at the moment we are selling hats online that just say Marcus was right about everything.

3:29So if you want to get one of those, you can do that now. But you were, Marcus. You were. I was suggesting that at the moment, Liverpool, it's not a tough place to go. No, absolutely not. Which seems ridiculous. And I keep thinking that this run is going to come to an end. And as you alluded to yesterday, they've obviously got the quality to win games where they're not necessarily playing at their best or their individual quality will kind of overpower the opposition. But it's starting to look like this is just sort of actually way beyond the control of Slott or any of those players and that essentially the Swindon lot have come in and it hasn't gelled.

4:09Other than Eketike, none of the new players have really worked out. We're a decent way into the season now. Obviously, Slott himself has made the point that Izak in particular is there for six years, not for six weeks. And that's true of all of those players and those contracts. But right now, they just look kind of clueless. And it looks like Slott doesn't really know how to get them to play in a coherent fashion. They don't seem to know, you know, where their teammates are going to be, who they can rely on, who's going to kind of press for them or defend for them. I mean, Salah's a massive problem at the moment.

4:47Salah is a huge problem for whoever is playing behind him. Yeah. For that second goal where he was just so square on, he just didn't defend it at all. It's like, well, at this point in time, Liverpool need every player they've got. They need everybody to be pulling in the same direction. But they can't have passengers at this moment in time. And he's very much a passenger. And I think if you look at their finishing as well, because they are still making chances, right? But they're not really finishing with confidence. And there is a lack of confidence that is just across the board, really. and we're seeing they struggle when they go a goal down but this was more than that.

5:24Kirkhaz was at fault again. I think the bad news here is really for Scotland because Liverpool are going to have to run Andy Robertson into the ground between now and the World Cup. Yeah. I mean, yeah. Peter, one might argue that this is a new low for Liverpool, that result and where it's going. I mean, they've lost nine of the last 12. That's their worst run since the mid-50s. I mean Stephen Gerald was rather irate on TNT sports when he was asked is it crisis time at Liverpool and he seemed to think that the word crisis was disrespectful I understand that fellow pro and a former Liverpool player and a manager who's had his own troubles indeed if it's not crisis time Pete what is it I mean it feels well look you make your own crisis levels don't you I suppose when you're that successful when you win the league at a canter, if you fall off second season and look like a mid-table side in the Premier League, you're in crisis, unfortunately.

6:27And when you've spent that amount of money, you are a crisis club because the levels are just so much higher than everyone else. I think it's more from Gerrard looking at that and going, well, if I was the manager, obviously he wants to be the manager at some point in the future. I think there's just so many kind of questions that are open on Liverpool that you don't really know where they're going to get better from. It's almost as if they're like, all right, OK, well, we'll get rid of this player. And, you know, you've got to have Kier as a starting because he's kind of like that. All the way through the interview, he was saying, oh, I think he's an impact player.

7:00And I think it was the team were basically saying, oh, I think he's an impact substitution. Well, he's not really. He's just a player who seems to give a toss. And he seems to have more intensity than most of the Liverpool side put together. so do you look at that and sort of go right do I make changes or do we just have a sit down and talk about the the basic functionality of how to organize a defense because that's where they're losing the the ball that's where they're losing um football matches individual errors and and just as a as a back um a back line they're just not functioning uh and Virgil van Dijk you know he's doing stuff that you would never normally do like that handball just was there was no need for it he sort of said that he was pushed or whatever.

7:39I don't see that. People are just making individual snakes they didn't used to make. So throwing the entire team and replacing it with a different set that you've got in reserve just doesn't work for me. I think that there's just something fundamentally wrong with this side and it's going to start in the head rather than the substitutions. I totally agree with you. I think the idea of we just need to make that little swap and that little swap. Yeah, absolutely you can get some gains from all that. Yeah, you're marginally gaining at the bottom of the yoghurt pot, if you will. You've still got no yoghurt left.

8:12You can't be... Yeah, this is... What's going on now, forget about the margin. You want to look at the main bit of the page. That's where it's all kind of... And this is crazy. I mean, we saw this... Struggling for examples. I mean, Ranieri's Leicester, the season after they won the league. in hindsight not the biggest surprise but I mean you go back in sort of Premier League and English top flight history Mourinho's second spell at Chelsea that was one where it just didn't happen the second season after they won the league but Leeds United you go all the way back to the early 90s when they were defending their top flight crown and a very very poor defence of it but they're very rare to be this bad in the season when a team is defending the title, I mean even Man City last season, they had their sort of wobble didn't they, and their shake for a few months, time will tell whether it's a period rather than maybe a wholesale change with manager and so on but going back to the game I mean, yeah, like you have suggested Peter that Virgil van Dijk is not getting any younger and that he's having his problems.

9:30Do you think now he thinks, if I try and officiate the game while playing in it, that would give us a competitive advantage? He's trying to control all of his compatriots in the defence and also he's trying to referee the match as well. He's got broad, long shoulders, but I think this might be too much for him. I mean, you sort of look at a game like this and the goals for PSV frequently, or certainly the chances for PSV, were all about being able to pick up the second ball. You know, it comes off a goalkeeper and PSV are always the first to the ball. It's this kind of like, you know, Klopp's side and to a lesser extent slot side from last season.

10:08The intensity was just always there and here. And now they're just not, it shouldn't be hard to sort of say, guys, can you just do a bit more running? And I think we might, you know, have a bit more of a chance with this one. That's it, isn't it? It is the basics. And they themselves have spoken this week about Van Dijk actually said that they really need to get back to basics specifically in this game. And they were missing again. And it is a perfect storm of circumstances here, isn't it? But I do think surely that has to be a psychological thing, right? Just going right through the team. And I know you guys spoke on Monday about the amount of attention that's being put on the situation with Diogo Jota and how it's perhaps sometimes a little bit unhelpful and possibly even a little bit crass.

10:53And I do understand that, but at the same time, we all know they're going through that. We don't really need to speculate on that. And I just think that that is, I think it's a much bigger factor than we perhaps thought it would be. For that reason as well, I think it's a delicate situation that is going to require a lot of sensitivity. and I think actually this is why I think Liverpool will kind of, will let slot kind of do what he needs to do to get them out of this period because it's a completely unique set of circumstances and I think they have to just, they have to factor that into every decision they make regarding this run of form.

11:37Okay, yeah, I don't think too many people would necessarily argue with that. I tell you what though, when they concede the penalty, up steps Ivan Perisic I thought there he is I mean him in that colour shirt he looks like the most Scottish Yugoslavian man I've ever seen in my life Yugoslavian Peter but he was born in Yugoslavia he wasn't I mean it's Croatian I guess but like he certainly plays for Croatia I don't know where he identifies I love an old reference as you know and I love a 90s reference but not even I would go there with that one alright fine the fine the kit did look like a Croatia away kit with the red and white checks have they done that just for him I don't know I feel like in the next round of Champions League games he'll pop up playing for like Olympiakos yeah it's just like just everywhere the man will just go on and on and on he'll be 43 playing in the Turkish Super League and he'll be saying Cristiano Ronaldo what did you go to Saudi for this is you know what I mean come on suddenly let the side down but yeah I mean, look, we talked a bit about Van Dijk there.

12:45Ibrahim Kanata is another man who's really struggling. I mean, I can't believe that slot is persisted with him in the side. I understand that players like to be backed by managers. It makes sense. But for his own sake, you know, take him out of the fire. I don't understand why. I know some people have said this, but he doesn't seem to fancy Joe Gomez at all. Yeah, that's really surprising to me. I think possibly there's a lesson there to be learned from Chiesa, right? Where that seemed to be the case with him at first. And actually he's proven that he's got a lot of value and is a bit of a kind of, he's almost become a bit of a sort of cult hero in a kind of small sense.

13:23And Joe Gomez obviously has been there a long time. So it's longer-serving circumstances. But I think, you know, he's got more to add, even if it's just to give Canate a kick up the arse. Because he's someone who doesn't look present at the moment. I think of him and Van Dijk he's the one who's struggling more Van Dijk obviously has got a lot of football in his legs and he's getting older now so you can possibly point to that as a factor but with Canate it's a really strange one if he's had his head turned by Real Madrid they're going to turn their heads away from him if they're actually watching him play because it's not a good audition like Squid Games it's that big monster looking at you but they made the point in the Guardian because Rona said that it must be quite stark watching Gerald Kwanzaa keep one of the best strikers in history quiet yesterday and then having to sit through that today.

14:14I mean, wow. What a strange situation that is. It bloody is. And like I say, I think these are changes they could make which would improve things, but there's a psychological thing going on at Liverpool because when they went 2-1 down, because they were showing a bit, again, there's a bit of intensity there. There are chances created because they're a really good set of players who are the Premier League champions, lest we forget. So again, that will happen and it should happen. When they go a goal behind, you saw this with Man City. Remember when Feyenoord came back from 3-0 down to draw 3-0?

14:46Now I understand a 3-0 draw at home is not as bad as a 4-1 defeat. But Man City went through that sort of phase where like, oh my goodness, we're not invincible, are we? And they wobbled every time. and again you could almost hear the away fans at their head-to-head going and this gets into the head of the opposition as well and suddenly they don't seem bulletproof so you just you know off you go and I think Man City are kind of rebuilding that kind of invincible feeling although you know they've had some bad results recently that suggest it's not straightforward as that but Liverpool seems to have been abandoned by the builders Well, you know what I mean though?

15:29It is one of those things where it takes a long time to get it back, but it's not impossible. But, you know, Liverpool are right in the eye of that storm at the moment. Yeah. Well, the bookies have on a slot as the second favourite for next manager to be sacked in the Premier League, only behind Leeds United's Daniel Farker. I mean, what do you guys think of that as... Farker out, I'm a Farker out match. If they were to... Well, then you're an enemy of football. I mean, if they were to part ways with slot, you know, this week or next week or whatever, I mean, do you think that would be, do you think it would be knee jerk?

16:05I think given, you know, what they achieved last season. I think those odds are a little bit like, it's a little bit of headline writing, I think. Sort of going, hey, look at the odds that we, you know, do you want to bet on something else possibly? Because I just don't think it's going to happen, to be quite frank. I think there are a set of unique circumstances. They've invested a lot in footballers that presumably aren't a slot really wanted. And I think they need to get it right under this manager. He certainly won goal before the end of the season. Well, yeah, the reason why, yeah, I suppose the reason why his second favourite is because if you look around the league, who's likely to go now?

16:44I mean, you know, Forrest and Wolves have both changed managers already this season. I think Burnley have done okay so far yeah so I think the Saudi Investment Fund have got no money now so they can't fire Eddie Howe are they doing a crowd fundraiser because I'd love to donate apparently they've run out of money because they're buying electronic arts I don't think they'll have run out of money I think they're going to be just fine they'll be alright But yeah, so I think, I mean, Jamie Carragher said afterwards, Liverpool isn't a sacking club. Okay. I mean, I know what he means by that. Well, Stephen Gerrard also said, this isn't a Liverpool defence.

17:32It's like, you're still you when you're shit.

17:38Enjoy it, Jim. But Carragher said, the manager is the king. I'm angry with the players. and Curtis Jones said Liverpool are in the shit. So some choice quotes there. I don't think he is going to get sacked. I think that he'll be... I think if this carries on to this degree, I think maybe January I would give it to. But I mean, as I say, it's slightly similar to Man City last season when they had that wobble. But Pep Guardiola is one of, if not the greatest manager of all time and has plenty in the bank. And that was clearly a bit of a blip. I don't think they are going to get back to his best, as I've bored on about for a long time now.

18:24But you knew there was going to be some improvement. I appreciate Slott's got a bit in the bank because he's the Premier League champion. But he's not nearly enough, not nearly the same level as Pep Guardiola, obviously. I don't need to point that out. So something will have to change. And the reason why I think that is because Liverpool are not going to win the league this season. and they're not going to win the Champions League, but they have to get back into the Champions League because for Liverpool to be in the Europa League or not in Europe at all next season is unthinkable. And I think that if...

18:58And funny. Well... And funny. Alexander Isaac and funny. Yeah, okay. Fair play, fair play, Peter. You've earned that one. Trish your arm. Yeah.

19:12then I think that they'd have to do something to try and arrest that but again another thing that goes in his favour is who do you get in? Jürgen? Have you finished your game of Paddle? There are no kind of blue chip managers kicking around at the moment at this moment in time you're going to be very hard pressed to find an upgrade for a lot of Premier League managers it's going to be just the same old faces Yeah exactly but I think if it is a psychological thing you know they've got the quality to improve. It's just so bad. So it is possible they can turn this around. Time will tell and Slott's got to do that.

19:48But as I say, I would probably give him until, say, if I'm going to be a little bit more specific, mid-Jan, and if nothing has changed, then I think that'll be that. Right. Okay. Gentlemen, can we go to the championship just for a brief moment? There was some championship going on last night. Sheffield United beat Portsmouth 3-0. Luke's not on the show so I thought we would mention that result now sources have said this week that Sheffield United of course won the Steel Derby recently but them and their neighbours Sheffield Wednesday are not having the best of times Sheffield Wednesday in particular have been suffering a lot recently which we've talked about before and sources have said that Sheffield United reportedly inquired about the possibility of merging with Sheffield Wednesday So is that, I mean, it's a bit like in some political spheres, you know, it's the right question, but the wrong answer.

20:48The question is, how can we improve the situation? We really need to improve the situation, but not like that. So, yeah, Sheffield Wednesday's sale is currently being handled by administrators, of course, because of that Dick Chancery ruining that club. COH Sports own Sheffield United and they got in touch with the administrators to inquire about a potential merger guys how about this I mean how about this I would love to see the proposals for that I was like yeah we'll still be called Sheffield United we'll still play at Bramall Lane and we'll keep the Sheffield United badge and kit how's that sound because we're United we won't need a training grant or anything what an opportunistic attempt to just consume your rival.

21:33It's outrageous. It's outrageous. Atrocious behaviour in the highest possible degree. Apparently it was, and I quote, promptly dismissed. Yeah. I just love it. I legitimately, Marcus, had a dream last night that Beyonce was trying to chirps on with me. Right. Trying to jam me. That dream again. Bothering me. And that dream again. And I was saying, Beyonce, no. Yeah. I have a partner. I also had, in the same dream, I dreamt that my asthma meds gave me positive drink driving blows so I was basically drink driving everywhere and Beyonce was asking me trying to get away from Beyonce we all have these big dreams but you wake up and you go that's not happening it's just not happening of the two dreams same dream I also lost my daughter because I was busy with a personal stylist working over my look it was a very busy night I've had I'm tired I would like us to do a whole episode analysing this dream.

22:33I think maybe next week's Ramble Uncut. So of those sort of parts of the dream, of the Beyonce bit and the drink driving bit with your meds or whatever, one of those we can put to the test. Right, right. Yeah, and it gives me a six-month driving span, which is great for everyone, I would suggest. Oh, dear. But anyway, Sheffield United, yeah. I mean, it's got Sheffield in the title. Yeah, I mean, well, Sheffield were the first club, weren't they? Yeah. Yes, famously. Yeah, so, I mean, and, you know, Get them in United and Sheffield Wednesday are, like neither of those clubs are Sheffield. So maybe they're trying to actually reform the original and first club.

23:20Or maybe it's a triple merger between the three. Ooh, maybe. There's been a merger. maybe a Sheffield Super Club. Well, elsewhere in Sheffield Wednesday news, Mike Ashley has reportedly made a£20 million bid for the club. Do you think they went, you know, they picked up the phone. Oh, I see what's happened. Yeah. This, this, this first story is fake to make this second one sound better. Yeah. Mike Ashley did the first call. Yep. Yeah. And then Sheffield United here. Do you want to get together? Because the, because, oh, okay, then fine. Well, I hope the second offer you get today will be accepted.

24:01Hello, it's Sean Bean, you bastard. I've got a proposal for you.

24:09I mean, if that is true, those two things happen. Do you think Sheffield Wednesday picked up the phone and went, can we still get a hold of Sheffield United? Because this is... Oh, dear. I mean, all joking aside, flipping heck. that club has been through the mill. We seriously do hope that neither Sheffield United or Mike Ashley take ownership of it. But somebody has to, because that is a proud and history club. And it is an absolute disgrace what's happened there. So yeah, we wish you all the best, Sheffield Wednesday, as I'm sure everybody does. But can somebody decent with some money please turn up soon, because bloody hellfire.

24:50Right, coming up after this, are Arsenal the best team in the world.

25:02Welcome back to the Football Ramble, everybody. Gentlemen, before we talk about Arsenal, I've got an email here from James Kitchen. He emailed us about the Withamshore Vets game that we were discussing this week. Withamshore Vets, of course, being the team with lots of former professional players, which I'm sure everybody remembers. James says, Hey guys, went to West Didsbury and Cholton versus Withamshore the other week on your recommendation. To follow up on the Emile Heskey cameo story, he came on with 10 minutes to go on the left wing and immediately controlled the ball from a clearance with the deftest touch I've ever seen at a game of football.

25:4030 seconds later, he tried to beat a man and fell over the ball. Genuinely, 10 out of 10 experience, no notes. I mean this is this sounds like so much fun they're going to have to build a stadium yeah everyone in the local area is going to get get wise to this yeah is this like like a a baller league kind of like grassroots kind of thing they're just kind of they've come together they just happen to be playing together and everyone's just going to be you know supporting it Sky are going to start broadcasting their matches the old timers have still got something in the tank yeah I feel it's more what was it the Masters League was it right The older players they used to do.

26:18Do you remember that we were robbed of the veterans, the Vets World Cup? Yes. That was meant to happen. Because you had a lot of the old England players obviously playing for England. You had some of their names, like Francesco Totti. Ronaldinho and people like that had signed up. Yeah, because it was going to be properly competitive, not like some of the Vets football, which is competitive, but then they kind of go, oh, well, let's let him score a goal. It is his testimonial after all, or whatever. Didn't they start it, but everyone was just too violent for it to continue. Fairly certain. Sort of like Robbie Fowler had people in a headlock and stuff.

26:51I can't remember. Fairly certain that happened. Have you been tricked by AI again? Yeah, I've been tricked by my dreams again. Yeah, I don't know. Well, look, we appreciate that update, James. There's not nearly enough information about how the game went or anything, but ultimately we wanted to know how Emile Heskey would get on in a cameo. You've let us know to a degree, and we're grateful for that. Yeah, good. Yeah, excellent. On the left wing, I ask you. Modern football. Surely he's got to be up front in top two. You've got to have two up top with Heskey as a support striker. Yeah, him and like Janinho.

27:26Yeah. What's Janinho up to? Janinho. Oh, blimey. Right there, Jim. Arsenal three. Bayern München one. Arsenal. Yes.

27:42We know that they're not officially the best team in the world because that is Chelsea, just to bring you back down to earth. But in the spirit of true football and so on, Arsenal, they are the team to beat in England and they are the team to beat in European competition now. It seems to be the case, yeah. They're the only team with a 100 % record and honestly, while they're playing like this, I just have to sit back and just enjoy it and appreciate it at the moment because we've had a lot of occasions this season where Arsenal have won games, they've won them quite narrowly or they've done a really professional job on a team and won from a set piece and et cetera, et cetera.

28:22And there has been a sense that there's been more to come from them. This week in particular, that has all clicked. And the last two performances have just been absolutely just, it's been scintillating stuff. Now, the first half was very, very even. The sort of stats bear that out as well. Same amount of shots, same amount of shots on target. Similar amount of possession, I believe, in that first half in particular. Although I was surprised to see that overall, Bayern actually had 61 % possession. But by the by, the first half, you know, Timber's goal is very good. He does a really good job of kind of unsettling Manuel Neuer a bit before he runs in front of him and then gets that header in.

28:59And then, you know, Bayern's goal felt like every other goal they've ever scored against Arsenal. It's a really great moment of quality that kind of comes a little bit out of nowhere. Miles Lewis-Skelly, I think, should be better at marking Serge Gnabry. He's just kind of not quite aware of where he is. And then they have that brilliant moment of quality. The second half was absolutely stunning. Absolutely stunning. They just dominated Bayern in a way that I've never seen Arsenal do before. Declan Rice had maybe his best performance in an Arsenal shirt. Man of the match. He was absolutely fantastic.

29:30Just a whirlwind. So dedicated. I mean, there was a point where he made a tackle on Kane that got as big a cheer as any kind of non-goal moment of the night. It's really just a joy to watch. Quite often those games are filled with anxiety, even if you're winning them. But there was a point where it's like, no, we've got this. And it was, honestly, it's the sort of night you've been waiting for for a long time. He's salivating, absolutely salivating. Peter, have they used up this performance too early, though? Well, it was really sort of bold, you know, Mosca and Skelly in. You thought that replacing two of your back line would be disruptive, but they had that wonderful press.

30:14Like Jim was saying, he was quite surprised that Bayern Munich had more possession, and they did, but the press allowed Arsenal to bring that aggression, especially second half to the four and you know it was almost like 4-4-2 body to body not giving them the second ball and it was just they weathered a little bit of frustration in the first half you could see the way that like Rice was like you say a huge performance from him he was frustrated with a couple of his teammates and second half they just came out of the blocks I mean maybe like Trossad coming off made them a little bit better but the way that they sort of went man for man Saliba was just stuck to Kane most of the match and he followed him wherever he went.

30:57Reyes, you know, flappy, confirmed Westman Reyes distribution was excellent. Some of the fucking balls he was putting in, like, that's why he's there. He's fantastic. And, and, and during Timber, I know he got his goal and stuff, but he was just absolutely world class. I just, it's the best Arsenal team I've watched in about 20 years, I think. I honestly believe that. Timber in particular, Peter, you're right to praise him because he's another player who's putting in like sort of eight out of ten in every game. Yeah. Much like Rice, and it's not going under the radar because everyone's saying he's one of the best fullbacks around now for good reason.

31:29Well, maybe Arsenal fans, but I think people are beginning to wise up. But I agree. I think maybe he is slightly underrated because there's so many other great players in that team. Yeah. And what was very interesting about Harry Kane's performance, because you mentioned Saliba kind of doing quite a good number on him, was that every time he touched the ball, he was booed, which I always find can energise an opposing player if they're a really good player. But the thing is, you didn't really hear the boos that much, which was a great barometer of how little Kane got involved. And shutting him out is so important because, you know, I think he's got 24 goals for Bayern this season.

32:05He's got a decent number for England as well. That's a crazy amount of goals. So I said on the show the other day, like, he's one of those players, much like Haaland, they're probably the only two in the world at the moment where you think, they're probably going to score. So we're going to have to mitigate against that. And they shut that out really, really well. On the Bayern side as well, I think Lennart Karl wants to get involved in that Yamal Esteval chat, doesn't he? Because he's only 17 and that was a great finish from him. He's put in some really big performances for Bayern already this season.

32:3217. 17. That is lead singer of Chili Peppers' girlfriend, young, isn't it? That is proper good stuff. I mean, it is like... Yeah, careful. Leonardo DiCaprio will be turning up and watching him sing. Hello. Not for some time. Not for some time. but yeah it's like they've kind of lost out on Florian Verts in the summer it's like should we just grow our own just do our own it's really good but you know his quality because he actually managed to score against Arsenal and it was the first goal Arsenal have conceded in the Champions League it's a real achievement isn't it yeah and it was interesting to me that you know that comes from essentially I think the two players that could do a bit better there if I'm nitpicking and it is probably a little bit harsh are Lewis, Gelley and Mosquera the two players that have come in Mosquera is a right foot player playing against the left footed centre back but you know it's a brilliant goal and teams are going to score brilliant goals against you so you just you have to just accept that sometimes but yeah that was the only kind of real real blip in a really stunning performance I think it's important to temper expectations as well you've got to remember that Arsenal beat PSG in a similar time around last season and obviously they went on to kind of grow into the behemoth that they were I think Bayern are in better form now than they were at the time but it's still there is a long way to go but But it's just about banking these wins and using them for confidence.

33:52And that is what I'm really struck by with Arsenal at the moment. There's so much confidence from every single player. And it's leading them to this type of football, which is so good to watch. Well, they're on for a treble, Jim, as you say. Mikel Arteta said before the game that Arsenal are in a different universe to Bayern. Certainly felt like that in the second half anyway. But I mean, I was at the game as well, Jim. doing my corporate hosting as I do. And Gun For Hire, if anybody's interested. You want some cheesecake? I'm brought some cheesecake. You want some cheesecake? Stop bothering people, Marcus.

34:30I'm hoisting the cheesecake in Paris. I meant toilet with the towels. If you do see me at a football match, then you want some cheesecake, Victoria sponge at Craven Cottage, obviously. I've usually got some on me. I usually sneak it in. I know you're not allowed to, but hey, they'll never find all your pockets, will they? No, certainly. It's quite annoying that Marcus spends his nights fucking hosting the hazards of Arsenal, and I spent like three hours waiting to get out of fucking Marseille's stadium. Yeah, that sounded awful. My feet in human detritus and piss together, only to just narrowly avoid getting pepper sprayed by the French police.

35:15Fuck you, Marcus. Fuck you. Proper Woodstock 99 stuff for you. You had an absolute shock. Do they do corporate hosting at the Velodrome? Because I don't speak French. Yeah, I'm in the home end, I'll say. Because if you want to work in one of those little foggy, like sort of like jail pods that they install, so you can buy a beer. I genuinely am filling in for a mate doing a couple of these things. This week, Chelsea Barcelona, Arsenal Bar, and I was like, yeah, I think I'm around for them. That'll do. That'll do. lovely old job yeah it was good but the point was I was at the game it doesn't matter how in what form or what guys or how I got there how much cheesecake you had down your front one of the people right and but I know Jimmy you've been saying this for some time again the atmosphere in the ground it's it's very traditionally un-arsenal like like it's properly raucous they're on every decision the crowd are letting the referee know their thoughts they are trying to make it an intimidating place and I think I'd say probably now it is even though traditionally not been but also when Arsenal when they conceded sorry they did that thing that you used to get at Old Trafford maybe you still do I don't know I doubt it but certainly in European competition you conceded a goal and they go right come on up and at them do you know what I mean let's get back at it that's been the case for a long time yeah exactly indeed and you see the psychological difference between say Arsenal and Liverpool right they are worlds apart now you could say that on the opposite last season but Arsenal, they didn't look perturbed at all when they conceded.

36:48It was like, okay, right, back on the wagon, let's do this. And it all bodes very well for Arsenal, blimey. What I'm really impressed about with that in particular is that because Arsenal concedes so few goals now, there is a kind of nice problem to have worry that when they do concede a goal, we've sort of maybe forgotten how to react to it. So what happens in that scenario? And they dealt with that really well. And clearly Bayern Munich and no Sunderland because they could not get that second goal. No, no, well, I've often said that. All right, coming up after this, Spurs do well before shooting themselves in the foot, and Ben Chilwell wants back in the England squad.

37:28Welcome back to the Football Ramble, everybody. Paris Saint-Germain 5, Tottenham Hotspur 3. Spurs lost their first Champions League game of the season. You have to say, though, Petey, they went down fighting. they did yeah it was a much better performance than the weekend but I think it's one of those things where it's like if if they have played well uh in the Northland derby or at least shown anything in the Northland derby this wouldn't have looked so impressive but yeah this was a really really different uh performance from Spurs I thought going with two up top something that obviously the Spurs supporters have wanted for a little while um you know the performances from Bergwijn and Gray in particular were really good.

38:10And I know PSG historically and almost consistently start very slowly and they sort of grow into the game and they obviously end matches better than they start them. I thought Spurs are really, really good value in this match but they just need to be showing this more times. And the manager's kind of, he's in a situation where he's probably never had to play so much football. He's probably never had so little time on the training ground because there are so many more matches when you're in Europe. So it's an interesting experience for him. I hope they get better this season and I hope they show a bit more like they've shown in this match.

38:47But Marcus, do you not think that anyone can play well in the Champions League against PSG? You're in the shop window in situations like that. These are the kind of nights that players dream of, really. I don't think anyone can play well against PSG generally. No, you can play better than you usually play because you're up for it. But it does almost feel like a free hit, though, doesn't it? I know what you're saying. Well, to back your point up, Pete, I actually said, ahead of the Liverpool PSV game, I said, when Real Madrid came to town, you are absolutely forced to kind of raise it. Now, that doesn't mean to say you're going to win the game, and again, Liverpool played well there.

39:23But yeah, when a side like PSV come along, it's kind of like, how are we going to approach this? So I do get your point. A way to PSG, everybody has to be focused and full of beans and so on. But I think you're right. It was a better performance by Spurs. There's no doubt about that. Frank said, I'm pleased with the performance. This was much, much more the identity of the team, the bravery and aggressiveness of the team. There were lots of positives, but we can't concede some of the goals we did. And Paul Robinson on the BBC said, unlike at the weekend, Frank can put his finger on the things that went wrong rather than scratching his head and thinking he didn't recognise his team.

39:57And I thought that was a good point, Jim, because both of those quotes there, Yeah, absolutely. Spurs were, you know, for most of this game, it was a good old battle, actually. And scoring three goals, there was no mean feat at all. And the mistakes were clear. PSG are going to make you, you know, they're going to ask questions of you, which may force you into errors. And there's no shame in losing there. But it was night and day from that performance against Arsenal. Yeah, and the teams are very different as well, weren't they? He made some big changes and understandably made them a lot more adventurous where you might think, in theory, you would go to Paris Saint-Germain and possibly try and be a little bit cautious.

40:42But obviously that fell so spectacularly at the weekend that it perhaps changed his thinking. Who knows? There's no Kudus in there, no Pelinha, which, again, was quite surprising when the lineups came out. But you've got Colin Mouane in there, up top with Richarlison in a very different formation. Archie Gray just behind him, who had a good game. You've got Pap Sarbach as well. And, you know, they were very competitive for a long time. And their first goal was really, really well worked. And it's, you know, perhaps this is going to unlock a different, slightly more adventurous style of playing for them that would kind of stand them in good stead.

41:18I do think when Vitinha hits that second goal in particular, you're probably just thinking, what can we do here? It's the sort of thing that just absolutely knocks the stuffing out of you. and then the two goals after that they should do better with really. But I think this is the problem with playing PSG, isn't it? They can just overwhelm you because it is relentless and it's not necessarily always a relentless press or always kind of relentless balls back in behind. Sometimes that relentlessness is just the quality of the players they've got and Vettini has already scored a banger from a similar area and for him to do it again.

41:52And, you know, the Spurs aren't really particularly at fault for those goals. It's just, it's got to be so deflating. and they've got the quality to just run you out from there. Yeah, and it would have been deflated, but again, it showed you Spurs' grit and determination that they weren't deflated and they were still going and still going. But yeah, Vitinho's a little bugger, isn't he? I really don't want England to play Portugal in the World Cup next summer because you just imagine him. Yeah, he's got villain status written all over him, isn't he? Thomas Frank said of him, Vitinho is the best midfielder in the world.

42:26he will be the next Ballon d 'Or winner. And you wouldn't put it past it. It's just, there's something off about Vettinia. I just don't, I'm not sure I believe it. Do you know what I mean? I've seen it all with my own eyes, but I'm just looking at that and thinking, nah, that's just that, that is unrealistic. It was Vettinia made by Grok, Soratou. Yeah. Are you Soratou, Vettinia? Yeah, what a player he is. But yeah, I mean, some of the, you know, Spurs did make some mistakes. Yeah, but that was clear. The one they conceded from a corner was particularly bad. But the main sort of like criticism that Spurs have gotten, it's almost kind of like a useful, I was going to say a useful idea, but a useful kind of excuse is that their strikers aren't very good.

43:11And it's like, fine, that is true. But I mean, at the end of the day, Charleston's an international. If you can get him right, if you can get him in the right position, he'll score. You know what, actually, I do think, and credit to, because I've not really seen many Spurs fans complaining about this, but they have the worst injury record in the Premier League at the moment. Yes, they do. They're missing James Madison, Dane Kulusevsky and Dominic Solanke, who are three massive players for them, three really good players, who are players that make a difference in games. So I think that needs to be factored in, particularly when it comes to assessing Thomas Frank.

43:43They do need to stop people scoring hat-tricks against them, though. Yeah, they do. That is going to be an issue, isn't it? That would have been better if it was... 5-4 looks so much better. So limit Vettinian to two goals, please. Yeah. Could we have a hat-trick of opposition hat-tricks when Fulham go to the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium? Yeah, surely you want a Dama Traore hat-trick. If that happens, you just fold the club, don't you? You just hand your licence back in. Give it to Sheffield United. Yeah, just turn this into flats and see you later. Mike Ashley, open a sports store here, please. Sell the stadium to West Ham.

44:22Everyone wins. There we are, you see. Before we move on from this, what on earth was Tio Hernandez doing when he elbowed Javi Simmons in the face? Oh, my God. Maybe he's as frustrated with Javi Simmons as everyone else is. Like, come on, surely you're better than this. Trying to gee him up a bit. This will help. I don't know. What a mad, mad bastard. Chaps, tonight we've got Europa League and Conference League. Aston Villa are hosting Young Boys and Nottingham Forest are hosting Malmour. a repeat of that European Cup final all those years ago before we were born even before you were born Peter it was yeah what do you mean even oh because I'm marginally older than you and feel it every second of my life get your stretches in well Peter in honour of that Forest owner Evangelos Marinakis has organised an event called One Night in 79 for tonight's game where surviving players from the 1979 European Cup final between the two sides will meet for a celebratory dinner.

45:26It's quite nice, isn't it? How's he going to ruin it? Well, I just think Marignac... I would not necessarily trust an invite for a dinner by Marignac. You mentioned it earlier, Pete. This has got a squid game feel to it, hasn't it? It's got a bit Red Wedding feel to it, I think. I've heard there's a little bit of a curse on the side in Europe and I think I'm going to end this right here right now. Why do I have to sign something to come for dinner? So what's that about? This is all in Greek what's going on here? You want my phone as well so good luck to everybody at that dinner and good luck to Aston Villa and Nottingham Forest Make sure you get your cheesecake down if you see me there you know I'm peddling Crystal Palace are in the Europa Conference League tonight they head to Strasbourg which is in France isn't it it's not in Germany it's in France sometimes it's in Germany I don't know it's not like that where's that little island on the river where six months of the year they're in France and six months they're in Germany yeah that's mad isn't it didn't like a famous king meet his future queen there as well in a secret Trist or something like that.

46:43Can't they just sort that out? A little Instagram post that pops up here and there. Lovely. Or maybe everyone's happy with that set up. I think they are. I don't think anyone's fighting a war over it. Producer Charlie has given us Pheasant Island, apparently called Pheasant Island. Pheasant Island, eh? How about that? Half Spain, sorry. Half Spain, half France. They've done pretty well, haven't they, in World Cups and Euros recently? Oh, no, we were France when they won the Euros. well I think half and half scarfs all round on Pheasant Island they presumably sell them there but yeah Palace off to Strasbourg and Strasbourg boast Ben Chilwell in their back line of course a former Palace player if you can call him that and he's still hopeful of making England's World Cup squad next summer he said Thomas Tuchel has told him there's a chance oh the dirty little tease um Chilwell said it would be the biggest middle finger to so many people which to me is a motivation Chelsea were honest with me and there's no resentment um but of course I've got an ego so it would be a nice feeling to prove some people wrong if there's no resentment for you Peter do you tend to stick the middle finger up or is it just uh to get your jollies yeah I would I would um I'd consider a wanker sign um but the middle finger I think the middle finger you're 28 and yeah I mean I guess you kind of play in a position that we it's kind of open for business with England but he I think he's only saying that because England's kind of left left wing back left back kind of position is is up for grabs a little bit if he was playing in any other position he wouldn't have he wouldn't have had that conversation presumably yeah it's it's all it's all positive isn't it Marcus you want everybody yeah firing on all cylinders motivated to get in that England squad?

48:35Don't you too, Jim? I do, but you are the biggest England squadder I know. Priapical excitement. What you're kind of suggesting is the hopes of the nation pin on my positivity and enthusiasm. I don't think I was suggesting that, but I will take it. You're the keeper of the positivity, Marcus. If we're suggesting that, then you're all in very, very good hands. I mean, he's made nine appearances for Strasbourg since signing in, I think it was September, and they got him just as the window was closing. it is a stretch but I admire his ambitions I am on record saying that I still think there's a good chance well a chance that Luke Shaw could do it so why not get them both back why not get them all back we were talking on Uncut the other day about footballers fighting from within clubs maybe we get both of them in in the England squad get them out in the car park last man standing gets the spot Luke Shaw will beat Ben Chilwell in a fight well you know that's for that's further motivation for Ben Chilwell isn't it he's got time to train that's for pay per view on DAZN isn't it thanks for listening to the Football Ramble part of the Acast Creator Network Petey Baby and I are back tomorrow with Lukey Moore for the preview show tomorrow it promises to be a classic until then thank you very much Pete Donaldson and well done for avoiding just the French police and their pepper spray but I do apologise that you genuinely had piss and faeces surrounding your shoes on the way to that stadium.

50:04Yeah, I specifically drank a pint of beer thinking, oh, I'm going to have a nice time just waiting for us to be let out of the stadium and look down and I was like, that's piss, isn't it? And I was wearing quite nice shoes as well, which is even more galling. Never mind. Wearing nice shoes to the velodrome. Did you not think that you might have to hot foot it out there? You have to wear springy trainers. That is on you, actually. There was a famous video going around of a man and a lady getting rather personal with each other in the toilets. And to be honest, the dogs were probably the cleanest part of the feladrom at that point in time because all of the piss and shit had floated into the main concourse.

50:45So well done them. Despite the filth going on there, it was the cleanest part of the toilet. Some of that defending was filthy. I did find it amusing in that clip when he says to her, oh are you from Newcastle as well you know keep it in the city Jim thanks very much I hope that your general glow keeps going until Arsenal's next game thank you man and maybe even beyond that who have Arsenal got next Chelsea at the weekend which is going to be absolutely seismic well the best of British luck to them anyway we'll talk more about that on the preview show tomorrow thank you again for listening and yes we will indeed see you tomorrow ta-ta

51:34The Football Ramble is a Stack Production and part of the Acast Creator Network.