Mailbag: Which pre-season prediction would we change now?

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3:28Luke Moore: Hello, everybody. Welcome to the Football Ramble Mailbag. Manchester City, Hull City, and Gianni Infantino are the orders of the day. It's Tuesday 8th of September. I'm Marcus Speller. I'm Luke Moore. And I'm Pete Donaldson.

3:52Luke Moore: Hello, everybody. Welcome to the mailbag. That's right. We're opening the bag and having a dip and seeing what is inside. Let's get stuck into Marcus's sack. Well, if you want to pop something in the bag, then do message us on xbluesky or Instagram at footballramble. Yeah, bluesky. Comment on... We're still doing that. I get hammered on Reddit for saying, taking the piss out of Blue Sky. You've got to take the piss out of Blue Sky, haven't you? Yeah, but if you take the piss out of Blue Sky, that definitely means that you're a fan of X and Musk and everything. I hate them all equally. There's no nuance, Luke.

4:26Luke Moore: You know that. Do comment on YouTube as well. Email us, show at footballramble.com. And of course, friends of the Ramble, you guys get priority. Patreon.com forward slash football Ramble or sign up on YouTube to become a friend of the Ramble. Right, everybody. Let us start with Jamie via our Patreon. Priority, it gets priority. Well, indeed. Proof's in the pudding. It's a Patreon priority. Product. Now, Jamie says this, given they lost their greatest ever manager, well, that's disrespectful to the late Kevin Keegan, and their best player, are you surprised by how well Manchester City have started the season?

5:02I wouldn't say I'm massively surprised given that with all due respect to those involved, they've not been up against that much. I mean, you know... You're shocked that they won at home to Coventry? Exactly. If you look at the profile of the games they've played, I mean, they've beaten Bournemouth at home, fine. New manager, first day of the season. First day of the season, a bit of a shit show. It's a crapshoot anyway, but they won that game, fine. Well, the Transmium is still open as well. Yep, exactly, Peter. Good point.

5:27Luke Moore: Excellent point. They beat Crystal Palace. Again, new manager. And still trying some things. And they've shown themselves to be vulnerable. because they obviously conceded two goals against Fulham. Tells its own story. Come on. And they've beaten newly promoted Coventry who are still finding their way at this level and who were beaten fairly handily by Arsenal, for example. And then, well, speaking of Arsenal, the only time Man City have actually played anyone that you think would make waves this season, it was in the Community Shield against Arsenal and they were quite handsomely beaten. They didn't look ready.

5:56So I think it might be too early to be asking the question. Tonight, they'll go to Porto, right? They'll play Porto in the Champions League. that would be an interesting test. Obviously, a different type of thing playing in the Champions League against teams who are used to winning and present a different challenge. So I think I'm not that surprised. I also do think, and I've been on record saying this, I think Mureski is a good manager. I think you said the same thing, Marcus. You think he's decent.

6:21Luke Moore: I fancy him to go to the top when he got Leicester promoted. There we go. You did. You called that very early. And that's done now. No, it's done, exactly. You can't go back on that. And look what's happened to Leicester. If he gets sacked tomorrow, he's still fine. Speaking of, I mean, Russell Martin's having a lovely time out at Leicester. Leave Martin alone. Did you see him the other day? You were insatiable. He ran over to the Leicester fans the other day and told them all to calm down. Yeah, nice. Great stuff. That's what you want to see, isn't it? It's great stuff. It is great stuff. Anyway, I'm not surprised because Mareska's decent.

6:50It's a big ask. The challenge will come when they have a two or three game run where they're playing against good teams and they have to really make it happen. They've not really had a competitive test for their level yet, I would argue.

7:04Luke Moore: Other than Arsenal I bet you've already covered that And that's a community shield It's a funny old game And I think we haven't been presented with a game yet from Man City where we go shit they've really missed Rodri there or what will Guardiola do here These are teams they're expecting with respect again to knock over and they have done fair enough The real tests will come I think I mean when Jamie asked they've lost their best player obviously he's talking about Rodri I understand that I have to say that I would actually say I think Harland would be a bigger miss if they lost him I know there was no talk of Haaland going and he'll be there for a little while, you would think.

7:36Luke Moore: But I think... I'm not sure I agree with that. Why is that? Because I think Rodri is the best player, standout best player in the league and in that position probably in the world. And I think Haaland is obviously Haaland, but City, I think... I feel City could go out and buy another big striker. See, that's my point. Harland's a branch and Rodri's the root. Right? Which makes many branches. Makes a lot of things happen. Harland makes one thing happen. Yes. Ball, net. Yeah. Pretty good thing. Ball, may I introduce you to the net? I don't think you could sign someone to replace Harland. Now, I think you could get closer to signing Rodri.

8:23Luke Moore: I mean... You think you can get closer... I don't think you could sign... I'm not saying you get someone to immediately, instantly replace Harland. I'm not saying he's instantly replaceable. but I think you can get someone closer by which I mean who can score goals at this level with the money they've got and stuff and you can get the profile of a player who can do that thing that Roger can do. Who is that? I mean, I just think, yeah, well, to be fair, I'm now taking Jamie's question into unnecessary territory. But do it. It's our mailbag, not his. it's up yours, Jamie. He's sitting over. Yeah, I think if Haaland had gone, again, there was no chat of that.

8:54Luke Moore: I think that would have been a bigger loss because Haaland is head and shoulders the best striker in the league. Like, it's just no competition for him. Whereas with Rodri, yes, he was probably, I say probably, you know, he was the best, you know, Ballon d 'Or, he won. And so you'd say he was the best midfielder in the league. But I mean, how far off are other top quality midfielders from him? And also, you know, last season as well, City massively relied on Haaland's goals. Yeah, exactly. Haaland's still delivered. The next top scorer in the league after Haaland was Semenya, was seven. Yeah, so I suppose a very, very roundabout way saying that if you've got Haaland in the side, you need to get the service he will get service he'll sniff out the goals and so I think you're right I agree with you you've talked me around well okay but if you've got Erling Haaland up top you've got an enormous chance and I think particularly against the lesser teams oh absolutely yeah but I think look at the squad they have because yes losing Rodri but Rodri like he wanted to go you saw what happened last season you know he was very much sort of him and Guardiola just you know, it was a wonderful together nicely.

10:01Luke Moore: Yes, exactly and so Guardiola leaves and then I'm not that surprised Rodri left but you look at, you know, some of the signings they've made. I think Illaman and Jai is a good signing you know, that sort of, you know, got him late doors Elliot Anderson as well, you know, they did good business in the transfer window. Enzo Fernandes to name another one. Again, that squad, you could make an argument that's the best squad in the league. Someone pushed back and go, well I ain't going to put a bad Arsenal. It's them or Arsenal who have got the best squads in the league. I know Chelsea have got a good score at the moment.

10:30Yeah, but I don't think that's open for debate really, is it?

10:33Luke Moore: But that's why. No, but the question is, are you surprised how well Man City have started the season? Well, when they've got one of, if not the best squad in the league, then the answer would be no, I'm not surprised. But the question marks over them aren't question marks around players. Yeah. Even with the absence of Rodri, because the question marks are it's a legacy hangover from from Guardiola and the fact that Rodri, who is the Ballon d 'Or winner

11:01despite me conceding the point to you which does necessarily further lend more weight to my argument than yours but anyway that's fine

11:08Luke Moore: So if I may talk about Moresca then It's more the kind of intangibles than the tangibles Fine, you're right and again in the next question when we talk about Hull we'll talk about how the intangibles are very important with Manchester City the way it ended under Guardiola, let's be honest, you could see that he was winding down. You know, you've seen the clips and whatnot and perhaps even the documentary where he is torn whether he should leave or not. You know, he was tempted by England. He was tempted away. He was tempted by other things. He stayed that extra season. I thought he was going to leave a year earlier than what he did.

11:43Luke Moore: So you could see that Guardiola, it was almost like one last dance or whatever. And his energy and his enthusiasm was beginning to wane. Now, they won two trophies. They won the FA Cup and the League Cup last season. So for a final season where he's knackered and Arsenal, you know, really, you know, gritted their teeth and a real dogged and determination won the league. I think you have to say it was a decent season for Manchester City. But by Guardiola's standards, it wasn't what they'd had before. And so that was on the wane. The players can see that and you needed someone to come in and maybe a little bit of a refresh, but not a rethinking.

12:21Luke Moore: and we will see as time goes on how Mareska does that. I think Mareska was easily the standout candidate for this job. People will say, but what about post-Ferguson? What about post-Wenger? Well, the whole post-Wenger thing, Wenger stayed too long in that job. I think a lot of people... Way too long. Yeah, exactly. So the post-Wenger thing, the dip in Arsenal's fortune and performance in the league and so on, that had already started and it's taken an enormous effort from Mikel Arteta and one or two managerial changes since Wenger. So that's quite a unique one. Ferguson, all these are unique. In fact, I don't think they're that relevant when talking about Manchester City because the way Manchester City are run, yes, it was built in the image of Guardiola and we will find how well it's going to go beyond that.

13:11Luke Moore: But I think they knew at some point he would leave and they've had a chance because he stayed that extra year. they've had a chance to try and make preparations for post-Guardiola because it would be mad if they weren't. So they've got the budget, they've got the know-how and the people there and so on and so forth to plan for this. Maresca, the old cliche, he knows the club, he'd worked under Guardiola. He fancied it, he was up for it. In his own mind, much to the annoyance of Chelsea Football Club, Maresca was almost already preparing himself for it and then also had a number of months free where he could do this.

13:47Luke Moore: So I think that this handover, I think it will go much better than what we've seen in other clubs. The ultimate one, you would say, although it hasn't ultimately worked, to use that word twice, was obviously Klopp to Slott. You saw how well... Klopp to Slott. Klopp to Slott. Klopp to Slott. How well that went in Slott's first season. But then, of course, second year... That's the title of the ninth Fast and Furious movie. Klopp to Slott. So I'm not... You're right to say they're all unique. You're right to make that point about Wenger's after already being a shadow of them for themselves because Wenger would not leave.

14:25But I do think... It's still early to say this. And I think the whole club lived and breathed Pep Guardiola. He's that type of character. It doesn't matter that he was their greatest ever manager. Even if he wasn't, the modern era of Man City is essentially the house that Guardiola built. and his entire backroom team went you know what I mean it's not like there's any of those left but Maresco was

14:49Luke Moore: in his backroom team for a bit but that presents its own problems I think not when you're knocking teams over to me the question is premature because it needs to be answered when they've got they're a goal down from the first leg in the Champions League quarterfinal or they've got a run of two or three tough Premier League games in March that's when it matters and I don't think I'm not going to be one of those people who says that, oh, anyone could do this at City because of the resources and because of how well it's out. No, I don't think that's the case. But I do think a manager of his quality could navigate the games they've already navigated.

15:24That's what I'm saying.

15:24Luke Moore: But I just think, again, to go back to Maresca, the point is, I don't think they could have gone for anybody better because he was there with Guardiola. He saw it work out. And not only that, he's gone off and he's done his time. You know, brilliant with Leicester in the Championship. He's managed Chelsea. He showed a bit at Chelsea. I know it was a bit of frustration. World Cup for goodness sake won the Club World Cup for crying out loud so he's shown a bit in the Premier League as well and then he just said thank you very much I'd love to go to Man City I'm leaving now there we are you see right now and here we are

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19:22We've got a message from Robert of X. Are you still an X? Are you still an X user? I occasionally go on there. It's hard to navigate on the train, because a lot of boobies. A lot of boobies are around. You're looking at boobies on other platforms on the train. On every platform. I mean... On the platform of the train. I mean, actually... The platform of the train goes into, I'm looking at boobies.

19:45Luke Moore: That's why it goes to Clapham Junction, Britain's busiest railway station. Wow. Loads of platforms there. Buzzing with Bristol's. Britain's boobiest platform. Boobiest train station. It's all of Nestle. and read recruitment I believe and read recruitment yeah alright nice there we go all the major food groups covered there Robert of X get a new job and have a lovely hot beverage can Hull keep this up and actually avoid relegation not premature questions yes yes and no yes and no Marcus is mates why are they my mates look at the table look at the table three matches in non newly promoted side has been relegated after taking seven or more points from their opening three Premier League games.

20:28You have to say, they're not going down the Derby platform. No, they're not.

20:34Luke Moore: The Derby Parkway. No, they're not. Can they keep it up and actually avoid relegation? Robert, it's possible. At this point, look, what's interesting about Hull is that the point that was made about them on this show before the season started, but I can't remember who it was, could have even been me. They used to not having the ball, right? And in the championship last season, I think they were something like 19th for possession. They still got promoted. Serving them well. But to me, it feels like there's a massive difference between being disciplined enough to not have the ball and then be effective when you've got the ball in the championship than when you're in the Premier League.

21:11It feels like a completely different assignment. Yet so far, they've been so good without the ball, they've kind of managed to do it. Very small sample size, of course. So we'll wait and see. but they've managed to pick up the points they've managed to pick up with 28 % possession. Now to me... Chelsea-esque. I mean Chelsea are right down there as well. Perhaps obviously in a different way. I think Chelsea are second bottom for possession in the Premier League this season.

21:41Luke Moore: But Jekirovic knows what he's doing here. Yeah but I think that sooner or later the music will stop right? I don't think you can give a Man City, an Arsenal, perhaps even a Chelsea who don't really want the ball but anyway that much possession and not expect to be completely battered and if you get battered at some point then how do you deal with that as a response sooner or later they're going to come crashing down to earth we're fucking hell we're in the Premier League now it happened to Ipswich at Old Trafford that mistake that was made in the middle of the park and then seven seconds later United have scored it was just so ruthless it was brutal it was like a brutal reality that doesn't happen in the championship just not at that pace doesn't happen so sooner or later they are going to come up against something they're going to get a tough run of fixtures or whatever they're going to get a few defeats and then we'll see how good it can be but again you could say that about so many other sides I mean they've played Manchester United okay opening day they've also played fellow promotional side Coventry and then they've played against Villa so they've not had like an easy time yeah it's a nice mix of kind of different players I mean obviously Villa aren't in great shakes at this moment I don't think Villa have scored a single goal yet no but the way that people talk about Hull compared to a team like I don't know Arsenal you know playing in obviously not a similar way but similar vibes in that they seek to control uh what they can control um and they still get people just sucking their teeth about you know the opposition's xg is much higher and stuff and i think they were quite high but they're they've signed loads of players yeah and they're not and they're not getting in the squad like that's the best thing about that they're basically they're basically feathered an s for like players um for november december when the when the when the fixtures start coming thick and fast like they're busy signing those players almost just to help them out then rather than now because the vibe's so good they're still using the players who got them up through incredible means well that's what Jiravich said he said when the League Cup comes around soon he said it was a chance for those players to get a bit of well you weren't saying that we agreed to sign for you you said we were playing the Premier League yeah at some point exactly I said you could play for a Premier League club it's not the same thing but it's just vibe everyone's just the vibe is right there are you enjoying the vibes I'm enjoying the whole vibes you have to and also as well I'm not going to see another goal yet but it's all that intangible stuff with Man City.

23:54Luke Moore: It's the same for everybody. You know, one of my worries as a Fulham fan is that the three promoted signs are showing a bit, but also that I think at Fulham right now, it could turn quite sour, that the confidence could go from some key players, some big players, and they go, you know, come January, I want to move out of here. You know, and if that is the case, then you're in big trouble. Whereas with Hull, I don't know what these players are like that they've signed. They've signed a lot of players. you're hoping that they're going to be committed. They're not just mercenaries who are turning up and going, ah, sod this if the going gets tough.

24:28Luke Moore: But it doesn't seem to be like that. And Jekirovic seems like the type of guy that his players want to follow. You think about when he turned up at Hull, they were in bad checks. He survived on goal difference from relegation. He's got them promoted ahead of time, some might say. Some great vibes as well. The memes. Magnificent vibes. He said someone posted, I think it was a Hull City, social post saying with Yikirovich saying my task this season was to keep you in the championship and I've failed. Yeah, exactly. Welcome to the Premier League. Exactly. What was the big banner they unfilled? Was it like one team, one family?

25:07Luke Moore: They're really trying to get that unity and that togetherness because that's what they will need. Which is important but they are also starting games in the Premier League with Olly McBurney up front. And it's working. And sooner or later. He's a rascal. He is a rascal. He's just a rascal. Too late, you're going to get burnied. What did he say? He was energetic. Your hands are going to get muck burnied. Yeah, he was energetic and a rascal, is it the owner said? It's the owner said, yeah. Yeah. I think it does, it's a great start from them. And the fact is that people have sat up and taken note.

25:35Luke Moore: And also that style of play that you talked about, you could say, well, actually, it's fine. They know what to do. Just do it better. Do it with more intensity and with more quality, you know, with some more signing. So yes, of course, they can start. Again, the stats go in their favour. As Robert has already said, no newly promoted side has been relegated after taking seven or more points. Goodness knows what that will mean in a number of months' time. But of course they can stay up. And if they stayed up, it would be such a two fingers to everybody, myself included, because I think everybody had them down as the whipping boys.

26:07Luke Moore: Yeah, they did. And right now they're not looking like it at all. Things can change, but right now it's not looking like it. In 2011, Blackpool under it and Holloway were top of the league. top of the Premier League got relegated 19th relegated pretty handily so it's very early to say is all I'm saying that's all so let's wait and see but listen has it been a breath of fresh air? yes it has it's been great it's been good to watch three games into the Premier League season and not concealing the goal they deserve an immense amount of credit for that indeed they do 100 % what about this from Michael on YouTube Pete you spend much time on YouTube?

26:37all the time he's got YouTube premium so have I actually so is Vish it's only a few quid it's definitely worth it if you're going to do it though do it as a Ramble member. Yes, of course. Yes. Superlake and that shit. Michael says, if you could change one of your Premier League predictions, which would it be

26:55Luke Moore: and why? Hull staying up. Man City winning the league and Hull staying up. What would yours be, Peter? I think we all know which one. Mine's a bit. Mine would be. Mine was, I didn't really stick my neck out. I was having a little bit of fun. Go on, have a little bit of fun. I thought, you know what? Yeah. I thought, you know what? Continuity being what it is, It's always very useful in the Premier League. I thought all of the teams who were in the historical title race would be changing managers, so I thought it might be a bit of a shit show. It hasn't been the shit show that I expected. Man United have been the basket case club that we all know and love, so I probably would change that.

27:31But I do like Luke's Chelsea team to be the only one to challenge Arsenal. Well, which is interesting, because one I would challenge would be Chelsea.

27:40Luke Moore: If you don't use them, let me have it then. Is Emmanuel United still a basket case of a club? They are approaching silly sausage territory, I think. Because of their transfer window? Yeah, just, yeah. Well, we were trying to establish, is there a new banter club in town? Spurs? Yeah, still Spurs. Because we were saying like... Spurs are the fucking Daniel Day-Lewis. They are incorporating that role entirely. When Spurs are not on the screen, you are waiting for them to reappear again and do something memorable. Daniel Day. Doing something diabolical. Yeah. they are the Daniel Day-Lewis of banter club I think my what do we have?

28:15Luke Moore: Overachiever and I you know again just to kind of try and will it into existence was Fulham and that's not looking too good do you know what if they just survive relegation I think that would be an overachievement right now overachievement is in the eye based on watching them I agree if you're saying could we sub in Spurs and finish 17th Yes, please. Yes, please. Does it make the Spurs more of a banter club that like last night or the night before Jay-Z did a triumphant show at the Spurs Stadium? Everyone having a great time. What about overachievers though, Peter? Would you have your beloved Newcastle?

28:51Luke Moore: Overachievers? No, I thought it was going to... At this stage, if I could let you change. I thought it was going gently... I thought it was going to go gently well, which is like chaotic evil. No, I think... I agree. I made the point at the start of the season and on the radio as well that there's a lot to be said for this idea that a lot of senior pros, a lot of big egos being moved on, new manager comes in, new broom, no Jason Tindall, crucially, stinking up the corridors. And Yaisal is a really well-respected coach. And I happened to bump into Brassel before the season started. Did you ever meet cute with Brassel?

29:22And he was waxing lyrical about Yaisal. He's a brilliant coach. He's really, really well-respected. Everyone wants it. What did I say? Yaisal. It doesn't matter.

29:31Luke Moore: Because you met Brassel. The Yaisal Tower. I like the call of the Yaisal Tower. The Yaisal Tower. He said Brassley. The Yaisal of the North. Yeah, we really respect you. Say my name right. Yeah, fine. Whatever. If you are going to come over here and work. Yeah. First of all, you are going to come over here, you need to work. You do need to work. Secondly, you need to get a beautiful British name. Yeah. Matthew Riesler. Matthew... Matthew... Yeah. Would you change your top scorer pick for Erling Haaland? What did I go with? I don't know. No, as in would you change it from Erling Haaland? No, I wouldn't.

30:00Luke Moore: No. Even though I slagged off the... Even with Olly McBurney? Bound to be on the score sheet soon enough. Top Rascal Scorer of the Year would be Oli McBurney. Potentially, he might not score a single goal. All right, right. Well, speaking of Rascals, we march on to the next question from Ty on Instagram. Ty says, I'd like to know Pete's manifesto to challenge Infantino as president of FIFA. That's not a question, Ty, but we'll go with it anyway. FIFA, of course, confirmed that Infantino would be standing for re-election in March. I didn't see that coming. Peter. He's bald, isn't he, I suppose?

30:27What would you do? Do you reckon as a contract, as FIFA boss, you have to run for another thing to get like a payout or something because it just seems like a really... I think you decide that. I think you decide. Who else is going to tell you you can't have a payout? Can I stay in bed today? Win or lose. Yes, you can, David.

30:45Luke Moore: Yes, you can, David. Win or lose, you get the payout. The statement involved the following things, which, let's be fair, the statement has been dictated by Infantino. It's very clear. Or AI. It's just the arrogance of the statement. You can just do a statement which is very matter of fact, right? The statement is the following. FIFA President announced in April that he will stand for re-election in 2027. Of course nothing has changed. Mr. Infantino will be standing for re-election. Mr. Infantino. Of course nothing has changed. Don't patronise us with a of course. It's a perfectly reasonable question.

31:18We had three months of insanity from you lot. Given the three months you've just had, it's fair enough to ask the question at least. He also found the room to accuse UEFA of a smear campaign against him.

31:31Luke Moore: Well, I'll tell you what, this is... By just basically highlighting the things he's actually done and said. Well, I'm pretty sure, this appears breaking news from this morning, that Belgium have withdrawn their support for Infantino, linked to, obviously, the Foller and Balogun controversy as well. It's taken them a while to get going, but I know, yeah. But to go to the Belgians. Yeah, exactly. Probably thought they had a guarantee from Britain to defend them. This time we will give you a guarantee, I promise. But yeah, they've withdrawn. I don't know what that will mean in terms of votes. He's going to get re-elected, isn't he?

32:03Luke Moore: He will pull it out of the bag somehow. Somehow, yeah. But Peter, your manifesto, though. I like it. Manifesto. Come on. World Cup, Black Label Deluxe, right? It's like the normal World Cup, but every squad is made entirely of luxury players. Your Raquel Mets, your Berbatoffs, your Dybalas, your Letizias. And they're there now. And that's how they are now. Why don't we just have an Old Boys World Cup? We'll have an Old Boys World Cup. But it has to be called World Cup Black Label Deluxe. What I like about this is you can't name any modern luxury players. No. You don't have them. You can't have space for them, do you, really?

32:35No, it's true. They're not allowed. Yeah, no. There's also an Australian man who turns up at funerals and shouts at, you know, if a man or woman dies, if a man or woman dies with a bit of information, like, for example, I think I was watching the interview with him and he was saying, this bloke died. And his brother, I think, was trying to get off with his wife. And he knew about it as he was dying. So he got this man involved. And he basically read out a letter at this guy's funeral basically saying, you're a wrong one. You've been trying to get off with the dead man's partner. Sorry, can I just get a quick sense check on what that's got to do with this?

33:19So at every press conference that I am involved with, he's going to be there to just tell the truth. Yeah, just to expose you, tell the truth. than that is my commitment to honesty. So your commitment to the truth... The Australian funeral man.

33:32Luke Moore: I like this, because you are so committed to honesty, even if it bites you on the bum. Exactly, yeah, no. Would you think you'd be corrupted by the position? Is that what you're worried about? Oh, massively, yeah. I think that's an excellent show. And the everyday Thirsty Thursday I'm going to be putting in as well. Ah, yeah. It's going to be Thirsty Monday, Thirsty Tuesday. Everyone's going to be drunk all the time. Pizza a pound of slice. On power and piss water. Is that why you fell off your bike? Because I spent a whole weekend in Poland getting drunk. Yes, yes. That is why. Is that why you were in Poland to shore up your support in Eastern Europe?

34:01I'm just getting support from my Warsaw. I came out of my bloody Airbnb and the president of Poland was stood right in front of me. Mr. Zoralsson. It's better than your Portillo story, that. It's much better. Incredible.

34:13Luke Moore: Yeah, but did you engage with him? Donald Tusk. No, he's the prime minister. It's not Tusk. Different job, different job. I don't know which one's which. Finally, for now, every FIFA employee can have five minutes. You've got to book them on the iPad, but you've got five minutes in the FIFA vault. You can either wear your on top hat like Scrooge McDuck or bring your honor. It's completely nice to you. Swim around. Just coins. Swim around the coins if you want. The radio fund if you want. I'd vote for it. I genuinely would. And so would Belgium. Yeah, they would. They're crying out for another candidate.

34:41Spelgium?

34:41Luke Moore: What's Spelgium? Well, we've got to join forces at some point. You can guarantee our vote. Which way is Spelgium going to vote? Definitely. For a new FIFA candidate? Because I can tell you the way the Luke Nation have voted. Well, we can all know that one. Fully behind Infantino. And rightly so. The man's done a fantastic job. Make me an offer. We'd like another... Oi, do you know what? I went to a Luke Nation meeting about this, and all I heard... Was it in Portsmouth? ...was four more years, four more years, four more years for Infantino. Fair enough. Yeah. If it was in Portsmouth, that's naughty.

35:12What? You're from that, right? I've already told you I was there. Do it in a sec. I was swimming the channel. Swimming the Solent, and it just so happened to come inside with it. I'm going to start a rumour that you came over on a boat. Rupert Lowe. Landed in Portsmouth. Made a life for yourself. Good on you. Rupert Lowe alerted the authorities about some people coming on the small boat and it was just some canoeists, wasn't it? That happened. That happened like three months ago. Not like Rupert Lowe, is it? The bloke from Harlepool came back from Panama. Yeah, it all makes sense. Is he going to be your running mate for the two people?

35:43They're on the canoe, man.

35:44Luke Moore: I think we're losing listeners.

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37:48from Mackenzie on the email to welcome the many new managers to the Premier League I thought it would be a ramble tradition to really get into the nitty gritty so four questions for you and we'll bang through these really nice and quick which manager would you like to go on a city break with oh you're not going to do more one go you're going to do more yeah I'll do we'll do one question per idea I think city break City break for me depends where it's going to be in Europe to be fair. You could choose the city. Well, because if it was going to be I think it would probably be Xavi Alonso but I wouldn't be averse to Keith Andrews.

38:25I'm saving Andrews. You're saving him for camping? Maybe. They didn't specify, oh I actually got Premier League so I was thinking Ainsworth might be able to find me in an indie club. Oh yeah, you can find your own one.

38:37Luke Moore: Double it up on skill sets there. I reckon you can find... Not Farker, and now not Marco Rosa, because I'm happily married. Right. I thought Sergei Yakirovich, because I reckon he could take you around, and then he would be very mind host, I think. No, but you're at 2am in some basement bar, and he's making you down shots. There is that. There is that. You're not going to go home. There's no way. He's a kind of geezer, I'll tell you now. Yeah, you're staying out. At 2am, you're having a good crack, you're having shots, and he just goes, after a while, from nowhere, just two of you there. After a while, I just go, what are you laughing at?

39:12What are you laughing at? Yes. What are you laughing at? You can't get out of it. And then he'll get back to the room. He's got the one Airbnb key. Yeah, and he'll get boxing gloves out.

39:25Luke Moore: Mate of mine, I can't name him because it was a friend of a friend who witnessed this, but it was a manager who's managed very prominent clubs in Scotland. Everyone would know this man. Played in the Premier League. I've already given too much of a clue away. Stephen Gerrard. And it's not Stephen Gerrard because he's managed more than one club in Scotland. But a feisty man. And he saw them in a pub in wherever it was in Scotland. And he was in there and he was with like his coaching stuff. It was on like a bit of social or something they're having. And there's one guy who he's getting really well with arm round and blah, blah, blah.

39:58Luke Moore: And then like two hours later, they both get chucked up fighting each other. And he was like, who was that guy? I thought he was like, he's his best mate from back home. Oh, nice. So it's like, that's maybe... That's kind of energy. Pierre Sarge. You'd eat well. You would. You'd eat very well. I think you'd eat well with Alonso though. I'm not denying that. I mean, Alonso, I would love to go to San Sebastian. Yeah, I think... He'd always be talking about Mikel Arteta though, wouldn't he? Yeah, you would... I think he might try and kiss you at some point, which I don't know whether you're up for or not.

40:27But Alonso would also probably only want to eat in like El Bully and places like that. He wouldn't want to eat... Is that nice? El Bully? I don't know that. If he's paying, you're okay. Who's gonna be yours for a city break? I'll go Pierre Sard. I didn't see the Premier League thing in the question in the running order, so I'm gonna go for Ainsworth for the Rock possibilities.

40:47Luke Moore: I think you've ducked it, mate. You have ducked it. Luke, who's most likely to take Pete to an indie club, do you think? Oh, the managers in the Premier League at the moment. I think Keith Andrews. Andrews would be up for it. I think Andrews would be okay. I think you, Peter, would have a lovely time with big Frankie Lampard. No, he wouldn't. No, he wouldn't. No, but you like to go to Eastern Europe and see some of the things. So I think Sergei Yakirovich would be your mate. Yeah, no, fair. Lampard's going to mog you all night. He's going to mog you all night, Pete. All right. Next question. Which manager would you like to go camping with?

41:19Nice. I'll just throw a man in there just to get you guys warmed up. Not Premier League, but we do love him. Gareth Southgate, he'd bring all the kit. He would bring all... He wouldn't be able to use a lot of it, but he'd bring all the kit.

41:29Luke Moore: I think Southgate would be... I'd go... When you go camping, you want someone who is organised, in charge. You wake up and you go, how's he making bacon and eggs here? And someone who's just across it, calm presents. I think old David Moyes. Ah, Moyes would be an absolute drip. Why? He'd be really moody all the time. No, he wouldn't be. I get the sense that he wouldn't eat any... He'd be eating like those little microwaved hot dogs and burgers and stuff. No, not... Rustlers. Rustlers. I think he'd just eat rustlers all day. I think Moyes would be great and he'd be like, you know, I'm going to go...

42:00Luke Moore: Why don't we go fishing for a bit? Fart from that. Fart the tent out. He would want to go fishing, I agree with that. I think it would be a nice, calm camping experience. You might night slap ya. I think I'm going Keith Andrews again. Yeah, fair. I'm saving. Do you want to hang out with Keith Andrews? We basically think Andrews is probably the most normal. Yeah, I just want to use a zipline. What about Farky in the morning? Nah. He'd have you do naked yoga. Sausage. Naked yoga, yeah. Make some German sausage. He wouldn't wear a single stitch of clothing the whole weekend. Yeah, I could see. Would he?

42:34He'd wake up and he'd be in the lake, but you'd only see him from the neck up. He's out in a swim, he gets out. It's like, oh, God. Not again. He's got a mullet down there as well. You know it's best to sleep naked in the sleeping bag. He gets you much warmer, yeah. What about your man Gary O 'Neil? Yeah, I'd like to spend... Well, I'm saving Gary O 'Neil. Oh, I see what you're saying. Don't save. I'd like to do the next one with you. Right. Which man would you like to share a flat with? Gary O 'Neil. Keith Andrews. Why Gary O 'Neil? We'd put a picture of Harry Redknapp on the dartboard. That's right.

43:03And we would also put a picture of Papa Boobie D up on the dartboard. God rest him. God rest him. Because he replaced Gary O 'Neill, which is disrespectful to Portsmouth and to a great pro. And I'd also, honestly, and you guys know what I'm like, I would never run out of questions for Gary O 'Neill.

43:19Luke Moore: Yeah, you wouldn't do. He would hate it, but I'd have a lovely time. I'd be like Neil Morrissey in Men Behaving Badly. But more talkative, clearly. yeah and as stupid yeah I got from Matthias Yaisler because I'm a Tia Yaisler because I think it should be very tidy very tidy very tidy he would iron his shirts he would iron his shirts as well he would definitely he'd be up and out in the house at five it's a proper odd couple that is what about Michael Carrick fellow man from the north east I don't know much about I don't really know much about he'd be a good flat mate because he'd be dull I think he's you're not getting any bother with Carrick I think he's had the good life for too long he's been he had such a long career at the top table and I just think he'd demand all the best stuff that I cannot.

44:01I cannot. He'd demand you to stop leaving your microwave with all the parts on the top. You're rustlers. Where'd he get that off?

44:06Luke Moore: Why is he giving me one? Mikel Arteta would be a bit annoying, wouldn't he? Yeah. Writing letters to the council. He'd also... He'd PowerPoint off the telly. You'd leave like a towel on the floor in the bathroom and it would be an hour long chat on the sofa about how you can do better. Yeah. I wouldn't have Marco Rosa because I'd be like, well, don't put your finger up there. So there's that. Unai Emery Too much hair gel I think Emery would be okay actually Yeah I think the older ones you want to avoid I think Keith Andrews is my answer Keith Andrews is my answer Maybe Emery's the good one for a European Euro trip because he's obviously spent a lot of time in Europe all over the place winning his Europa Leagues There you go No love for Frankie Lampard Never No probably not Right Finally for now Finally for now and which manager would you like to go to bed with Ah, you know, in for a penny, in for a pound.

44:56Luke Moore: Daniel Farquhar. Or Marco Rosen, come on. Let's just get it done. Can you check my prostate while you're doing that? I was going to say, we shouldn't do this. No romance for him. We shouldn't be doing the questions, but I was going to say, he's talking about prostates being checked. Absolutely outrageous. Anything? Hurry up. I'll give Arbolara a nod. Right, good. Okay, yeah. I'd like a severe rogering from Chris Wilder. None of these are Premier League managers. No further questions. Do you know what, Ryan? We put this in, quite wonderfully, we put this into AI. Okay. You want to extend this longer, do you?

45:36Luke Moore: Well, AI knows its onions, okay? So these are past Premier League managers chosen. Oh, so the AI can't even stick to the rules. No. You haven't got me. I'm not having a... Yes, I am having a go at you. You and the rest of the internet. Your intelligence is also artificial. So this is what AI came up with. So, for city break, Pep Guardiola, because he appreciates architecture, fine dining, and vibrant urban culture. There's absolutely no evidence whatsoever that Pep Guardiola appreciates architecture. I think this would be good, though. He'd gone out about his ex-wife and losing the passion on that trip.

46:09Luke Moore: Exactly. So for camping... Ah, Pep, I took you away, she'd shut up about this. For camping, Jürgen Klopp. Right. Because his high energy and enthusiasm make outdoor survival fun and lively. You don't want high energy, you want to conserve your energy? What is the concern about AI? It's about AI. They're just making it up. You say camping, they turn it into a survival situation. Which we might have to use at some point. You're eating all the Pemmican because you're too tense. I think that's a good answer. For sharing a flat, Carlo Ancelotti, because his calm demeanour and love for good food create a peaceful home.

46:38That's not bad. That's not bad. Cigars outside.

46:42Luke Moore: And yes, AI gave us an answer for who do you like to go to bed with? For a quiet evening of rest, because of his direct, honest nature, makes winding down simple and stress-free... It's so puritanical, isn't it? And postococcal. Right. Yeah. I'm in favour of AI now. Roll over, mate. Turn the channel over, mate. I'm done. Okay, London. I'm done, by the way. Right, I'm done. Let's put London's burn on.

47:19Somebody I know was at a fire station taking their kids to go and see the... Sorry to bring kids in here, but at this juncture, but they brought him into a fire station and there was a shrine to the cast of London. Was there? Post-Alfred, was it? Was it in London? Post-Alfred. Post-Alfred, yeah. Amazing.

47:38Luke Moore: Amazing. Amazing, that. Incredible. Yeah. Ah, Jerry B. Believe it or not, everybody, we've got one more question. Yeah. Go on, Luke. Right, this one to finish off. I mean, we've got to finish now. I'm sorry for the phrase. Nick on X. Has a Frenchman ever looked more like just some bloke from the pub than Pierre Sarge? Now, there's something in that. The first time I saw Pierre Sarge when he was announced as a new manager of Crystal Palace, straight away, my instinctive thought was that's a snooker player. Yeah. He looks like a pretty middle-ranking snooker player. I see what you mean. He shouldn't be anywhere higher than League Two with that face.

48:20But then the problem with the French accent, the French voice is just... It glamorizes it. It just turns everything. It polishes any facial turd. Facial turd.

48:33Luke Moore: Yeah, all agreed. Yeah, there we are. There we are. Thanks for listening to the Football Amble, part of the ACAR's Creator Network. Pleasure having you with us. I'll be back tomorrow with some of our other rambles. I think I'm here tomorrow. Some of our other rambles. Have a minute as well. Well bugger me We'll see you tomorrow everybody Lots of love Bugger me It's been an absolute I'm done Oh you out Oh you out You out

49:04The Football Ramble is a Stack production and part of the Acast Creator Network

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