Mailbag: Who needs a Champions League run the most?

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3:28Luke Moore: Hello everybody. Welcome to the Football Ramble Mailbag. Champions League campaigns, boyhood clubs and job shares are the orders of the day. It's Tuesday 10th of March. I'm Marcus Speller. I'm Luke Moore. And I'm the new Shida Hunter Raja

3:52Luke Moore: Hello everybody It's mailbag time It's a great time It's a great time Luke It's a great time Yes It's a great time

3:59Vishnu B. Narayanan: This is Simply having a wonderful mailbag time

4:04Marcus Bean: I wondered where you were going to go with that I thought you were going to say Tuesday time You shouldn't have It's pretty straightforward. Yeah.

4:10Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah, yeah. Vish is still reeling for spilling his coffee all over the desk so he needs time to compose himself. Yeah. Leave the coffee before the coffee leaves you, Vish, as Jamie Carragher once said. To you specifically. Leave those beans. Because you keep spilling your coffee. Stop spitting here, Jamie, then. Yeah. Leave Carragher out of here. He made a mistake. He said sorry. Yeah, he did. He did. But what a shot, though.

4:29Luke Moore: Now, remember, you decide what we talk about on the mailbag. Get in touch on ex-BlueSky Insta at Football Ramble. Come on on YouTube. Email us at footballramble.com. Friends of the Ramble, yet priority. Patreon.com forward slash football ramble or sign up on YouTube. Plenty of things to do. Get your questions in. Do it. Right. Let's start this. This jamboree from a question from Peter on YouTube. Which of the English teams outside of Manchester City and Arsenal brackets, as they are amongst the favourites, would benefit most from going deep in this season's Champions League? So just to remind everybody, Liverpool face Galatasaray in what is unquestionably the tougher side of the draw Chelsea face PSG in what would be unquestionably the toughest route to the final Newcastle United face an unquestionably tough task against Barcelona in the slightly kinder side of the draw and the reason why is the kinder side of the draw is because Spurs are in it and they face Atletico Madrid

5:27Vishnu B. Narayanan: The English teams are among the favourites 66-1 Spurs

5:32Luke Moore: No, Man City and Arsenal are among the favourites. That's why Peter has put them aside.

5:37Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah.

5:37Luke Moore: So he's saying which of those four teams, Newcastle, Liverpool, Spurs, or Chelsea would benefit most from going deep in this season's Champions League? I want to hear from that guy first, Verdusion.

5:49Vishnu B. Narayanan: Tottenham. Yeah. I disagree with you. Gigantic fig leaf. Yes. Shaked like a

5:54Luke Moore: Champions League trophy. I'm going to disagree. Well, let him answer. No, I don't think I will. No, you're going to answer the question.

5:59Marcus Bean: No, no, do you disagree with me? What are you going to say?

6:01Luke Moore: A different team. But why do you think Spurs?

6:04Marcus Bean: I think Spurs, because I think fundamentally this question is flawed, because they'll all benefit from going the furthest. He's thinking of the fans. For various different reasons. Don't you floor our fans? Yeah, yeah, I will floor you. Not actually, I'm not going to hit you. I will not hit you. Not again. I think, yeah, quite an obvious one, but purely because...

6:24Vishnu B. Narayanan: Because you're thinking of the fans, and it would relieve a lot of the pressure on the ownership, the management, the players, because the fans are the ones beating the charge for burning the whole thing to the ground. so if they do well it'll kind of cover up a lot of problems

6:36Marcus Bean: yeah exactly that and also the fact that it might be quite funny if they're in the Champions League in the Championship but that's not going to happen

6:42Luke Moore: I mean they would have to win the Champions League

6:43Marcus Bean: yeah I know well that's going far is it I don't think they're going to get past Atleti you're right are they especially when Conor Gallagher unleashes himself as a secret agent he probably won't be picked anyway secret agent on the bench

6:55Vishnu B. Narayanan: can't do much but I'll do my best right yeah

6:58Marcus Bean: because obviously a lot of what a lot of the reason that Spurs are in this in the situation they're in is because they focused more on their status than actually developing as a football club despite the fact that you pointed out regularly about how it looked like they signed well in the summer transfer window ahead of this season and I feel like there is some vindication I suppose like mitigation for the way they operate at an ownership level if they're going through the Champions League and what that would mean to the fans to have like some pretty big nights, whether they're at home or away days where they're against, you know, they'll either play, you know, they're playing Atletico now.

7:43Marcus Bean: Should they progress, they'll then play Barcelona. There are loads of big moments that might, I don't know, you know, fans aren't going to forgive it, but it's probably the closest they'll be aligned with the ownership to be like, I see what you're trying to do, but also we enjoy it. It's a big if.

7:59Vishnu B. Narayanan: isn't it? But if they were to progress through against both those Spanish teams, you're giving fans things to hang their hats on. But the problem is even then those fans know there's nothing to back up afterwards.

8:16Luke Moore: Which is why I don't think to give a defensive answer why it wouldn't be Spurs because they've had this last season in the Europa League.

8:22Vishnu B. Narayanan: I don't think it no but Europa the Europa League they knew there was a path into the Champions League. So and it's much more realistic for them to win it and they weren't as bad a state as they are now it's actually a lot worse now right

8:34Luke Moore: yeah it's a continuation but yes but it is worse it's unquestionably worse no one was talking about

8:39Vishnu B. Narayanan: them getting relegated in March last year

8:40Luke Moore: so even if Spurs got to a Champions League final which again I don't think anybody in this room thinks they will I think that I don't think that would benefit them that much I think that the whole thing is the Champions League might be a slight distraction I think

8:55Marcus Bean: yeah that's kind of that's basically what I meant that's kind of Well fine

9:00Luke Moore: Indeed A big distraction From all the everyday stuff

9:02Vishnu B. Narayanan: Like going on holiday

9:03Luke Moore: For a week Yeah And I get that Which is why I think Would it benefit them I think it would Yeah I think it would Give the fans a little bit Of a holiday But you come back home Oh yeah And the house is still Burnt down And the neighbours hate us Do you know what I mean Like it's still It's almost like Kicking the Them going far In the chapter Kicking the can Down the road

9:23Marcus Bean: Well so then So with that in mind then My second answer was going to be Liverpool because that is a reaffirmation of status, isn't it? Yeah, okay. As what you're saying is like one of the biggest teams in Europe, if not the league this time around. Yeah. And that kind of reinforcement of, you know, yeah, it hasn't gone perfectly. There are clear flaws in what Arnie Slott is trying to do. The squad looks unbalanced, but they still have the power of quite and quite Liverpool.

9:54Luke Moore: Yeah, I think there's something in there.

9:56Vishnu B. Narayanan: I think Liverpool is a solid answer. Look, the nature of these things is that every club in this stage of the Champions League has their motivations and their reasons to want to progress as far as they can, obviously. And then you can also construct reasons as to why it would be a big benefit for them over another team, right? That you can just do that. Like, Liverpool is a really interesting example because of some of the stuff Vicious said, but also, you know, this is a team that defines themselves on European performance, right? And they, They are not a team who is motivated to have to prove themselves in Europe the same way a Spurs, a Newcastle, or even a Chelsea would.

10:37Vishnu B. Narayanan: Chelsea have obviously won it on more than one occasion, but it's come recently and Chelsea are dogged by this chat that's sometimes coming from me, which is they're not really a big European club, right? Last season, of course, they're in the Conference League. But Liverpool...

10:53Luke Moore: Sorry, they are a big European club, having won the Champions League.

10:56Vishnu B. Narayanan: But it's... Fine, that's your opinion, which you're perfectly entitled to. What I'm saying is to... I can clarify it further if you want. There's no way anyone who knows enough about football would consider Chelsea to be part of the royalty of European competition. They've been financially doped in the last 20 years and found themselves at the top table through spending loads more money than everyone else and have won two Champions Leagues. That's not the same as being a big European club, in my opinion. That's just my view.

11:23Luke Moore: So you wouldn't say Man City were? No.

11:25Vishnu B. Narayanan: No, Man City aren't a big European club. No way. Well, do you think they are? Now? Yeah, I do.

11:29Luke Moore: But anyway, look, we get... Sorry, I get off track.

11:30Vishnu B. Narayanan: But they're going deep in competitions. There are reasons for that. And I think there's more to it than that. And that's not me being churlish because I support, you know, a traditionally big club or anything because I don't. Liverpool can settle back into the Champions League by casting Galatasaray aside, going deep and obviously giving the impression, actually, we're having a bit of an off-season domestically, but all's well. All's well because we spend the big money. we're Premier League champions to the end of this season and we're Champions League semi-finalists again because that's what we do that's of massive benefit not just to slot but to them as a club and to their identity then I think on Newcastle they are clearly however long term the project Newcastle United fans think it is and Saudi owners behaviour maybe suggests that as well they are still really fighting to be taken seriously you know they force their way back into the Champions League they get knocked out in the group stage they have a little bit of time off again.

12:25Vishnu B. Narayanan: Now they're in this new format. They're in the knockouts. If you want to be taken seriously, might not be now, but in years to come, you have to beat teams like Barcelona. You have to do that. And actually some of their best nights as Newcastle United in the Champions League in the past have been beating Barcelona. So it's synonymous with doing that stuff. So there's arguments you can make for Liverpool, Newcastle. I agree with Marcus on the Spurs thing. I don't think it does much. I totally get why you're saying it. but ultimately to use that analogy take it to its natural conclusion you've still got to get the flight home for your holiday you still have to sooner or later if you're having a lovely time dancing the DJ's going to pack up his gear and you're going to have to go home

13:04Luke Moore: you can't pray for an Icelandic ash cloud no that would be

13:08Vishnu B. Narayanan: no force majeure is going to stop it so those would be an assortment of my rough thoughts anyway

13:14Luke Moore: the two teams I'm looking at here for that question were Liverpool and Newcastle actually and I think you've explained that pretty well especially with Liverpool. I think with Newcastle, I think it would benefit them. I think it would benefit Eddie Howe as well, more specifically. Absolutely. He can

13:29Vishnu B. Narayanan: prove that he can do it.

13:30Luke Moore: Well, indeed, because currently in the Premier League they are 12th. Now, clearly, if they don't finish in the top half, that's poor. They had a decent run in the League Cup. Beaten by Manchester City over two legs. That can happen. So I don't think too much criticism. Bit of a shame how it happened. a bit of a shame for them going out of the FA Cup as well. Again, Man City, and they were good. So you kind of think, all right, all right, fair enough, fair enough. But ultimately, they're out of the domestic cups and they're not in a final there. In the league, if Newcastle were to finish in a kind of more mid-table position, which they might well do, then that is a little bit disappointing.

14:12Luke Moore: Let's be honest for them right now. If they were to go deep in the Champions League, if they were to get into a semi-final, if they beat Barcelona and then say, what would it be? Atletico Madrid in the next round, potentially. You know, forgive me for sticking my neck at me. I think Atleti will beat Spurs. But whoever, if Newcastle manage to do that...

14:30Vishnu B. Narayanan: You've not stuck your neck out very far there. Not at all, no, really. No sniper's taking your head off. You're not going to bud the parapet with that.

14:38Luke Moore: You know, if Newcastle were to do that, I think that it would ease the pressure on Eddie Howe should they not qualify for European competition next season, the season they have. And I think it would still... there would be a huge feel-good factor. The disappointment of not being in the Champions League the following season, I think maybe the supporters and those connected with the club might just say, oh, do you know what? Howe could do it. All right, another kind of season, a non-Champions League season. Right, all guns blazing now. Let's get back in there. I think it would buy him a little bit more time, potentially.

15:11Vishnu B. Narayanan: Because the one word that essentially summarises the whole Newcastle United situation has to be progress. Eddie Howe has to feasibly be able to sit down with his paymasters and be able to say, this here represents progress. Now, finishing ninth in the league doesn't represent progress. They're 12th at the moment. They might not even get as high as ninth. They probably will. Beating Barcelona in the Champions League, maybe getting through one more round after that, which would be tough. That's progress. You could argue. I'm not saying it is or it isn't. I'm saying he could possibly argue that it is.

15:41Luke Moore: And he could also argue, well, had we have, you know especially in terms of wages gone more in for certain players that they wanted in the previous I mean they made signings but let's be honest they missed out on a number of targets they were trying to get he might say look look what we did in the Champions League if we can get some more I know you know I know money's too tight to mention with with Newcastle and some other Premier League clubs but I think it would be a good argument for him and and and his um and and his team to say look you back us look what we did we've got to get back there so I take the point what you're saying Luke about it would be progress that would be my answer to that from Peter on YouTube but a good question though absolutely a good question a good question

16:23Vishnu B. Narayanan: straight back in with another question this one's from Thomas on the excellent X previously known as Twitter some great stuff on X as we know Thomas asks this after your recent conversations about Daniel Farker running which Premier League manager would you most like to run a 5k with I mean immediately I need to say to you that it's going to be a very short list for two main reasons. One is I haven't run for ages and that's why I'm wearing these and part of the reason I'm wearing these ridiculous trainers that's been commented on YouTube, by the way, is because I've got a really bad knee and so I can't do much running at the moment.

17:00Vishnu B. Narayanan: Part of the reason I've got a really bad knee is because your friend, ex-colleague or ex-teammate Cully, Dan Cull... What's his name? Daniel Cullingham. Daniel Cullingham nutmegged me so badly in 8SI two weeks ago that I turned around too quick and twisted my knee. So that's why I'm in big trouble. So I can't really do much for him. So what I'd need to do is I'd need to go with someone who's slow, sympathetic, and also a little bit overweight. Back to you, Daniel Farker.

17:26Luke Moore: Oh, that's naughty. Well, he is. He is. Do you know what? I was looking around and I was thinking, yeah, like, where are the older managers? Because if, you know, I would say Roy Hodgson because I've got a chance of beating him sort of thing. But there's, looking at the managers. You'd be fine. You two would both be fine doing a 5K. No. But I think, yeah, there's certainly sort of younger, managers. I mean, what about though, if you wanted to have a bit of a chat or get some knowledge while you're going around? Well,

17:52Marcus Bean: they say that's a good thing for running, don't they? you can have a conversation while you're running.

17:56Luke Moore: Liam Rosina.

17:58Vishnu B. Narayanan: He'd be really competitive and he'd be really boring. He would talk you through. He wouldn't want to talk to you because he'd be listening to a podcast. No,

18:04Luke Moore: I think I would need a lot of encouragement. Do you want a bit more heel? No. I would need probably a bit of encouragement. So Sean Dyche.

18:11Vishnu B. Narayanan: He's not a Premier League manager. He was this season. It doesn't matter. I know.

18:15Luke Moore: He's not.

18:15Vishnu B. Narayanan: Could you imagine doing a 5K doge? Come on, keep up. I thought you'd do Scott Parker. Bang straight away. Parker, maybe.

18:23Marcus Bean: I hate running, and my internal monologue is just how much I hate it and hate myself, and how I hate how I might look when I'm running. You've got to fight hard against that, yeah. Yeah, so I would go running with Igor Tudor so he can just tell me how shit I am. Yeah. You're fucking useless, you are. Why are you even running?

18:39Vishnu B. Narayanan: Those wealthy, powerful businessmen pay to go to get beaten up in sex dungeons. That with Iga Tudor

18:44Marcus Bean: They pay to get chased Through a jungle Yeah Exactly We'd have to name him Yeah He does very well for himself Exactly Don't worry about it It's alright

18:52Luke Moore: He's not here I'm just saying He's not here to defend himself Oh isn't he

18:57Vishnu B. Narayanan: You're better off not knowing Mine's got to be Farka The list I had That I could feasibly Get away with Was Farka The reason I mentioned It's not a dig at him Because Because you know He's basically admitted himself That you know He doesn't look great When he's running and that's the whole point of this. Right. And I think he'd be a nice fella and I think he'd be encouraging. Yep. I've got Arnest Lock. He doesn't look like he's in Great Nick. Right. I might be able to run with him. He's Dutch though. Some of the things he'll be coming out with would be filthy.

19:25Luke Moore: Yeah, but he's quite calm though, isn't he? I don't know if he is that filthy. Filthy. No, Farker.

19:28Vishnu B. Narayanan: I've already got Farker for that. And the third one, I was struggling here because all the others would be an absolute write-off, was David Moyes because he's older.

19:37Luke Moore: David Moyes is my answer because...

19:39Vishnu B. Narayanan: And he looks like a smoker even though he isn't.

19:45Vishnu B. Narayanan: doesn't he look like a smoker

19:46Luke Moore: yeah he could have a tab with Vish on the way around I would go for Moyes because I just I think Moyes would do it in the right spirit and I think he'd have a great chat with him all the way around and I think he would give you a bit of encouragement and if you got a little bit too lippy or anything like that for whatever reason above your station he'd put you back down so I think Moyes would be the answer because again like all joke aside I think imagine having how long does a 5k take like the long weekend. Spencer you are. I just think having that time with Moyes where it's a leveler, you're doing a run, chatting away to him about his career and all the rest of it.

20:22Luke Moore: I think it'd be great. I don't know that he's

20:24Marcus Bean: great company, you know. I think he would be. No, no, no. I don't. Have you got some insight?

20:29Vishnu B. Narayanan: Got some wicked whispers.

20:30Marcus Bean: Well, no, just, I think if you look at the way that he talks to like, for example, you know, people post-match.

20:37Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah, but Marcus is an alpha. He ain't going to get away without Marcus. Exactly, fellow Christian.

20:40Luke Moore: We can talk about the Bible.

20:41Marcus Bean: Exactly. Fair enough. If you've got something in common.

20:44Vishnu B. Narayanan: What, you're suggesting that David Moyes isn't great to, he fails the waiter test.

20:50Marcus Bean: Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's not very Christian. 100%. Is it?

20:54Vishnu B. Narayanan: Well, if it is true. Yeah, I'm putting words in Vish's mouth, admittedly. Vish, if you're going to go halfway towards calling someone out, go to full Luke Moore. Yeah. Don't go back. Oh, I've heard. It's probably nothing. It's probably nothing. Vish, Vish, never go to full Luke Moore. I sat to myself every morning in the mirror

21:13Luke Moore: before I leave the house yeah what are you doing in the mirror fail every day

21:15Vishnu B. Narayanan: yeah come back my wife sees me I can upset I've gone on the full look more again not again you haven't have you

21:21Luke Moore: yeah true

21:22Vishnu B. Narayanan: I think Marcus and David would get on they've got they've got Scottish experiences that's true Christian experiences yeah and both awful to waiters so it'd be fun

21:32Luke Moore: terrible to waiters I try to think about have you thrown the soup out of a waiter before David it's so satisfying

21:38Vishnu B. Narayanan: Half it's gone on me. Oi, Nuno, because he was a keeper and then not known as being that fit.

21:44Luke Moore: You'd have Rob Edwards.

21:46Vishnu B. Narayanan: He'd batter me.

21:47Luke Moore: No, but he'd be singing Bon Jovi on the way around.

21:50Vishnu B. Narayanan: You don't... Come on. I tell you what, now I'm in. But you remember a mutual friend of ours who used to be my manager at Sky George? Oh, yeah. So he was a very fit lad. He's 10 years older than me, but he was super fit. He'd cycle into work every day, he'd triathlons, all the rest of it. I went for a run with him at lunch once when I was in quite good nick. my PB for 5k is like 22 minutes not bad not slow not too shabby George at one point was so bored with me he was running backwards in front of me and then running off and doing stretches and taking the piss and I think Rob Edwards would be like that

22:21Luke Moore: and by the way did I tell you that I saw George not that long ago he owns a pub gave me a free burger and chips did he really? oh wow come on yeah I'll come to the pub

22:29Vishnu B. Narayanan: because he might get in trouble for that he doesn't own it he's a manager

22:33Luke Moore: don't want to get him in trouble it was a discounted one

22:35Vishnu B. Narayanan: it's very George don't mention the pub because we're going to get him in trouble. Fair enough.

22:38Luke Moore: Fish, you've got the next question for crying out loud.

22:40Vishnu B. Narayanan: Because when I was last there, he was dishing out free drinks to everyone, including his son.

22:46Luke Moore: Don't say how old his son is. Fish, the next question.

22:49Vishnu B. Narayanan: Is it my son's nursery?

22:54Marcus Bean: Josh, on email, comes with a question. If you're a lower league footballer, would you rather play against your boyhood club or the rivals of your boyhood club? This weekend, Rhys Oates was awarded player of the match against Arsenal as a lifelong gooner whereas Newcastle fan Ben Wayne got to score the winner against Sunderland and I can't decide which one is better it's a good question

23:15Luke Moore: of Ben Wayne doing that for Paul Vail it really got me thinking

23:17Vishnu B. Narayanan: it's a great question I've got a comprehensive answer I thought you might so the answer is if you're finding your way and you're young and you've still got a whole career ahead of you you want to play against your boyhood club because you can say this is what you're missing if that ship sailed and you're ploughing your furrow in the lower leagues you know realistically so Riso So, God bless him, he's not going to play for Arsenal. So he should be telling me he wouldn't rather give a bloody nose to Spurs than he would Arsenal. I think when you're a bit older or you know you're not going to play for that team ever, you want to be playing against the rivals because you feel a bit like a secret agent.

23:52Vishnu B. Narayanan: You're like one of those guys out in a kind of foreign outpost, you know, fighting hard for the cause without really being part of it. So I think that's how it works.

24:01Luke Moore: So I thought for you specifically, I thought surely you'd love to get the winner at St. Mary's. and give it plenty to the home fans. I would.

24:07Vishnu B. Narayanan: I would.

24:07Luke Moore: Yeah.

24:08Vishnu B. Narayanan: But I'd rather play my whole career at Portsmouth.

24:10Luke Moore: No, no, no, sure. But as in, yeah, so you've said those parameters, which I sort of broadly agree with. But in the cold part of the day.

24:18Vishnu B. Narayanan: If I'm like 35 and...

24:21Luke Moore: But for you, though, just to jump in, you might have... Portsmouth might be beneath you.

24:25Vishnu B. Narayanan: It's unlikely. You've seen me playing. I mean, at this stage, yeah, it is unlikely. I don't want to be giving my team a bloody nose unless it's a chance I'm going to be able to say to them, you can have a bit of this if you fancy it here's my agent's number

24:37Luke Moore: but I think there's something to be said that you know if you are I admit it obviously this game was at Mansfield Town but if it was at the Emirates it's kind of like but you did play at the stadium you know you got to swap a shirt you got the shirt you got a bit of the teensiest little taste of the biscuit

24:53Vishnu B. Narayanan: but for me I would rather so I guess in this case would you rather play at Fratton Park or would you rather score a hat trick at St Mary's or something

25:01Luke Moore: a hat trick is it

25:02Vishnu B. Narayanan: yeah All this shit is fucking made up. Right on the back of the whole thing.

25:07Luke Moore: You score, so, you've got, you score 25 overhead kicks at St Mary's.

25:12Vishnu B. Narayanan: Over and over again.

25:14Luke Moore: But you've got a bad back.

25:16Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah. 22 of them are left side now. After the 18th,

25:18Luke Moore: you're doing a Vardy, grabbing the ball and running back into the half way back.

25:22Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah.

25:23Luke Moore: Fine. So what would you rather then?

25:25Vishnu B. Narayanan: I would rather, I would rather give myself the best chance of playing for the team I support.

25:31Luke Moore: Right.

25:31Vishnu B. Narayanan: And if I can't do that, I'd rather smash the shit out of Samampton. It's always going to be the answer. Right, there we go. What about you, Vic? There we go.

25:39Luke Moore: As a Man United fan,

25:41Vishnu B. Narayanan: who do you consider to be the biggest rivals? Oh, that's a good question. Liverpool.

25:44Marcus Bean: Be Liverpool and then City, yeah. Yeah, okay. You can throw Arsenal in there, but yeah, I wondered, for Ben Wayne's point of view, if he's from a family of Newcastle fans, then you're just suddenly a bigger legend. a bigger talk point within your family. Do you remember Christy Pim, the Grimsby Town goalkeeper? Yes. Who, you know, played in the game that knocked Manchester United out of the League Cup. Good to be reminded. He, post-match, he said, they were like, what's been an incredible feeling? And he said, well, I'm a United fan, so I'm fuming.

26:19Vishnu B. Narayanan: Right.

26:20Marcus Bean: And when he was, you know, at Blundell Park when he was in goal in front of the United fans, one of them went, oh, mate, just let one in. And he went, I'm a United fan. I was like, yeah, then let two in.

26:31Luke Moore: I think it depends on how the game would pan out so if you're playing for a lower league club and you get beat like 4 or 5-1 I'd rather play at Craven Cottage to say I played at Craven Cottage maybe even sneaked a goal got a shirt, lovely job, etc. but if you are ramping it up as you say Luke and you're thinking do you want to put your team out of the cup? no, so I would rather score the winner in a dramatic fashion at Stamford Bridge for example so that's I suppose yeah if you could paint it I would either way

27:02Vishnu B. Narayanan: I think we can both agree Rhys Oates and Ben Wayne have both had a bloody lovely weekend they've had a lovely weekend so it's different different shades of the same enjoyment

27:08Luke Moore: Ben Wayne in particular though because he's in the next round absolutely all over again that probably answers the question I think doesn't it alright coming up after this at JobShares we wouldn't mind ourselves

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29:34Vishnu B. Narayanan: All right, welcome back. this one's from Joshy McSquashy which I think Marcus that's your porn name isn't it or is it your rap name one or two

29:45Luke Moore: yeah actually you might

29:46Vishnu B. Narayanan: better answer that well it was sadly relevant but Joshy McSquashy asks just don't keep saying it what Joshy McSquashy I wonder where he got that name from

29:57Luke Moore: I don't know

29:58Vishnu B. Narayanan: who knows

29:58Luke Moore: he knows

29:59Vishnu B. Narayanan: so anyway Joshy McSquashy on Discord he says with Michael O 'Neill currently managing Blackburn on a job share with his Northern Ireland duties. Fucking annoyed me at the weekend because they scored. They did, yeah. Portsmouth scored in the 90-odd minute against Blackburn. A massive relegation game to go one and up away from home. Probably would have seen them safe and then Blackburn scored again. Blackburn scored 90 seconds later. Come on. I actually watched that game, yeah. Yeah. Michael O 'Neill's the manager of Blackburn and Northern Ireland, which is an amazing throwback. It is. And also amazingly disrespectful both to the good people of Blackburn Rovers and Northern Ireland.

30:36Vishnu B. Narayanan: Anyway, what other job would the pod like what? Sorry.

30:39Luke Moore: I'm just laughing at your comment.

30:40Vishnu B. Narayanan: I'm trying to explore what Joshy McSquashy's asking us here.

30:43Luke Moore: I didn't say, I just smiled. Okay.

30:45Vishnu B. Narayanan: You don't smile very often. Like Roy King. Something's going on at this smile. Very similar. What other job would the pod like to do alongside the ramble? Now, the way that it's worded is us, not individual. Yes. Us. So what other job? Oh, I see. I think we could be great fishermen. on a boat together, catching some fish. I can't swim. Bring in the... Well, stay on the fucking boat then, big boy. That was my first point. I was about to say,

31:12Luke Moore: I think you misunderstand fishing techniques. Yeah. Don't dive in and strangle them. Yeah. In some parts of the world they do that. And that's... I don't really strangle them. Well, whatever they do, sometimes, you know, it's about getting down and dirty. Yeah. I think here, though, you're not jumping into the channel of the North Sea. You know what I love?

31:30Vishnu B. Narayanan: I love us in some kind of tropical environment. Vish has got to stay on the boat and we're diving down on our spears. Yeah.

31:38Luke Moore: Love that. And we pop up, Vish, number one over there! No, that's a pike. You can't eat it. You don't get pikes in tropical water, I'm sure.

31:45Vishnu B. Narayanan: No, you wouldn't get a pike down that part of the world. Wouldn't have thought so.

31:48Luke Moore: Wouldn't have thought so.

31:48Vishnu B. Narayanan: But I like the idea of us running a fishing vessel. The three of us. Yeah. Let's be honest, the production guys will be doing all the work.

31:54Luke Moore: Yep.

31:54Vishnu B. Narayanan: We'll be sitting at the back. Vish will be smoking.

31:56Luke Moore: How are we taking the glory? We get the photos.

31:58Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah.

31:58Luke Moore: We get to do the photo of us holding the fish.

32:03Vishnu B. Narayanan: There you go. And the big shark comes up. That's a Jaws reference. Yeah. So as a group, I think we could do a fishing vessel.

32:11Luke Moore: We're not doing deadliest catch. No. Friendliest catch. We're just getting minnows. We're getting minnows. Just dolphins. Yeah.

32:19Vishnu B. Narayanan: We'll do friendliest catch. Friendliest catch, yeah. Just chuck a bit of dynamite in the water.

32:25Luke Moore: We're not easiest catch.

32:26Vishnu B. Narayanan: Pick them all up. Deadliest catch. Nowhere am I going near the Bering Strait. No. Listen, I'm on the record saying that. I'm not fishing in the Bering Strait, whatever you tell me. Charlie, however much the sponsorship money is, I'm not going to the Bering Strait.

32:38Luke Moore: Do you remember that program River Monsters?

32:39Vishnu B. Narayanan: I do, of course. Brilliant. My friend was a big part of the production team. One of the monsters.

32:45Luke Moore: Yeah, they got him. That's when they got him for me. He's what he's named us. Yeah, we could...

32:48Vishnu B. Narayanan: Jeremy Wade.

32:49Luke Moore: Oh, what a man. What a character. What a character.

32:51Vishnu B. Narayanan: What a man.

32:52Luke Moore: I will say that time and time again on my way home. But we could do something like that, couldn't we?

32:58Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah, we don't really have any expertise. Yeah.

33:00Luke Moore: Yeah, well, we take Big Jezza with us.

33:02Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah, we take Vish with us. He sounds like a right expert.

33:05Luke Moore: Don't worry. The monster's made its way onto the land. You're up. He's never getting a job. First interview question.

33:11Vishnu B. Narayanan: I can't swim.

33:12Luke Moore: Do you know what? I think the job that I would love us to do alongside this, and I'll be honest with you, unlike Luke's, this is, this is, there's, I would say there's about 50. CNT sports commentator? No, no, no. Alternative commentary at the World Cup.

33:27Vishnu B. Narayanan: Well, I was going to say, talk sport of the weekend with Rory Jennings. Why?

33:30Luke Moore: You could do that alongside this. Stop having a dig at a nice chap, okay? I'm just saying,

33:35Vishnu B. Narayanan: we've seen empirically you could do alongside this. Yeah, you've done it.

33:38Luke Moore: Yeah, fine.

33:39Vishnu B. Narayanan: Alternative World Cup commentary.

33:40Luke Moore: Right, no, that's what I was going to say. Football Ramble tour operating kind of for England games at tournaments.

33:48Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah.

33:49Luke Moore: Give me a clipboard. Right, lads, everybody on the bus. You know, you can be in charge of the playlist.

33:54Vishnu B. Narayanan: You wouldn't be interested in doing any of the organisation. You just want to watch the game. Of course I would. I just said, I've got the clipboard. All he would do would be chatting to fans and go and watch the game. Tell me that isn't what you just do.

34:04Luke Moore: What else do reps do?

34:06Vishnu B. Narayanan: Okay, what time's the flight, Marcus, please? There is no flight from this airport. It's a home tournament. We don't need to go anywhere. because he spent all his time chatting to a couple of lads with England shirts on.

34:16Luke Moore: Euro 2028, a lot of the games. What do you think of Chelsea's season?

34:19Vishnu B. Narayanan: It's always that. Exactly, yeah. Which team do you support? You were a man of the people.

34:22Luke Moore: I don't need to answer that because it's an England thing.

34:25Vishnu B. Narayanan: It doesn't matter, does it? We all come together at times like that.

34:27Luke Moore: That's what I mean. So who's going to do the organisation? Jim? Pete? No. Someone will. Right, okay. So you just described us as fishermen. I think that'd be great. Right, okay. I'm sticking by that. Fine. I think us organising some sort of ramble tour where we get tickets. Stuff we've already done ourselves is more realistic. And all I'm saying is... And I think it would be brilliant. I'd get a coach. Vish, you can drive it. Can you drive Vish? Of course you can.

34:53Vishnu B. Narayanan: You still got the jazz?

34:54Luke Moore: Would you let people sit in the back of that? you can drive over.

34:57Marcus Bean: It's surprisingly roomy. I wouldn't let anyone sit in the back of it.

35:00Luke Moore: We get the Ramble Battle Bus. We're on our way. Vindaloo's playing. I've got a clipboard. Luke's got his top off. What is there not to like?

35:08Vishnu B. Narayanan: When I talk to you about how this is going to be organised, all you've done is describe things that you'd quite like to do that don't have anything to do with organisation.

35:15Luke Moore: Right, so you think that would make a better podcast?

35:18Vishnu B. Narayanan: It's not about a podcast.

35:20Luke Moore: It's more realistic than all of us being on a boat.

35:22Vishnu B. Narayanan: No, in the summer when there's no tournament and we've got three months to do nothing, let's get some fishing done Vish's answer is Ramble branded cigarettes so

35:32Marcus Bean: mine was I actually misunderstood the question so I got really into the idea of us being in conflict with ourselves so I have all of us working for the Saudi public investment fund listen the money would be good I was about to say

35:47Luke Moore: that would be a much bigger money spinner than fishing than fishing who we're selling the fish to we've blown them all up

35:53Vishnu B. Narayanan: depends how good depends how Listen, depends how good you're out fishing. Yeah? But let's keep it sustainable, guys. Fine. That's all I'm saying. I think we've answered that pretty comprehensively.

36:02Luke Moore: Yeah. Ramble tours, though. Come on.

36:03Marcus Bean: It's still dismembering, isn't it? It's true.

36:07Vishnu B. Narayanan: We could cut up the fish with a bone saw, couldn't we?

36:08Luke Moore: Pete would do that.

36:09Vishnu B. Narayanan: Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, he did a terrible job. Pete probably has done that.

36:13Luke Moore: Exactly. That's what I mean. Lead on your experience. Yeah. All right. Before we go, this from Ben on Insta. I think Vish should be stripped of his remaining belt for his final answer on Friday's Jack's Encyclopedia. Or at least a points deduction for bringing the game into disrepute. That's not a question, Ben, but we'll... But it's a jumping-off point, isn't it? It is, it is.

36:35Vishnu B. Narayanan: So, look, before I get you on this, Vish, because presumably you're going to do a full and frank apology down the bar of that camera, but before you do, look, the points thing is Jimmy to the B's domain. If he decides... He's the independent commissioner. If he decides there's a points deduction, who are we to argue? Secondly I'm not sure about the remaining belt because I quite had to rip it off you by fair means rather than admin reasons but I do think Marcus I'm sure you agree with me on this after your behaviour on Friday there has to be some kind of punishment Well I think the punishment

37:05Luke Moore: is just hearing Vish do a sincere apology because I don't think I've ever heard him do one

37:08Vishnu B. Narayanan: No, not anything

37:09Luke Moore: I don't think I've ever had anything to apologise for And fair lies the problem Do you regret what you did on Friday?

37:17Marcus Bean: I think I apologised immediately to the production staff wary that I might have just like kiboshed the last few minutes of the show. Yeah, their hard work. Yeah. I don't know where they came up with that question from. Very good question. Was a good question. Worked for me, Marcus. It did, yeah.

37:34Vishnu B. Narayanan: So look, Ben speaks on behalf of a lot of the listenership where he says that, you know, we need something done about this. There needs to be some action. We need, for our own closure, the listeners seem to be saying, we need some kind of action.

37:43Luke Moore: Perhaps, okay, so we're not going to get apology. I understand that. That would be like trying to get, you know, semen out of a stone. But, I think a promise You're thinking about the fishing thing I am I think a promise of some sort would be I think that would surprise us I'll do it again I'll do it again Yeah there you go The promise is he'll do it again

37:59Vishnu B. Narayanan: Is that what you asked for? That's red rag to a ball stuff This is going to run and run I'll do it again I don't want to tell you when

38:04Marcus Bean: You're going to know Looking at their phones 10 minute show today

38:11Luke Moore: Oh dearie me There we go There we are everybody Thank you very much for listening to the Football Realm a part of the Acast Creator Network please do send us your responses opinions and questions for next week's Mailbag and become a friend of the Ramble too and join the conversation on our Discord

38:25Vishnu B. Narayanan: don't let up your consistent demands for apologies from Vish either we can get a groundswell going he might have to do a Keir Starmer I might leave the show seriously don't do that thank you now

38:35Luke Moore: yeah no we need you we love you we cherish you just wish you were a little bit more apologetic thanks very much everybody see you tomorrow

38:50Marcus Bean: The Football Ramble is a Stack Production and part of the ACAST Creator Network.

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