Summer Series: Dicky Tum Tum Hostel (feat. Rick Edwards)

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3:17FIFA Gate continues swinging and Rick is on the pod. Welcome to the Football Ramble. It is Wednesday the 5th of August. I am Pete Donaldson. I'm Luke Moore. I'm the Deeson Hunter-Raja. And I'm Rick Edwards. Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

3:41Ricky's on the pod. Ricky's on the pod. Ricky's on the pod. Ricky's on the pod. I don't think you join in. I like your board captain hat, Rick. Yeah, thank you very much. It's very nice. Like an admiral. Like a trendy admiral. I think it's very presumptuous because this is very much Pete's ship. He's sailing the ship. Yeah, this is the party boat. you are behind the bar speaking of party boats Pete slept in a hotel again last night I believe not again it makes it sound like I've been kicked out well it has happened before which you know TikTok might happen we've all slept in a hotel before it's not that remarkable let me qualify went out on the piss last night didn't go out on the piss I went to watch some culture at the Soho Theatre which was terrible what did you watch I watched Patty Harrison it was poor upset your stomach didn't fancy the train from Fenchurch Street so ended up last minute unplanned, staying in a hotel again.

4:33Yeah, and making a real mess, if I'm honest. But look, that's how I live my life. I'm back on top form. How do you broach that at home, though, when you're quite close to home but don't make it? I think she knows. I think she's kind of like... Welcomes the break? Yeah, don't need that in the house. You've got to hear a kazoo in the background, the party popper. Well, it is the latest of our Football Roundup Summer Series and we're delighted to welcome another special guest. He's the host of BBC Radio 5 Live Breakfast, Fighting Dog and Football Daily. It's Mr. Rick Edwards. Do we applaud? I can't join in with the other stuff, but I will applaud.

5:12Is this your first role after announcing leaving the breakfast show? Breakfast show makes it sound too light and fluffy. No, it is a show and it is also a stint. Is it my... I guess so, yeah. I guess so. I try not to do anything other than that. Other than my job. I try to avoid. What are you going to be doing? You're going to be doing your UEFA badges, spending our time with the family, that whole song. I mean, he might as well. England cricket coach, there's a few vacancies on there. Head of FIFA. Stand at a hostel in Penchart Street. Come on in, guys. You've got flexibility now. It's great.

5:45Free Wi-Fi. Open a hotel slash hostel that is just toilets for Pete. Yeah. And people like Pete. And call it the Dicky Tum Tum Hostel. The Dicky Tum Tum Hostel. For people who can't make it home. Would you reopen to officially opening that on Rick's behalf? Well, no, Rick, but presumably Rick would have to... Snip a cord that looks like a colon. Yeah, because it spills out. It's in and spills out. Oh, what is that? Oh, no. And how long has it been in there? A champagne bottle smashed against a toilet. Yeah. It's a Scott lead. I know. Rick, what does it feel like leaving such a storied and early morning started stint as Breakfast Short, a presenter?

6:22Well, you've sort of, the question has alluded to the answer. I'm very excited about not getting up very early anymore. very excited about that couldn't stick out your sixth prime minister like you know no no simple as no I don't think I could but to those of us at least tangentially in the industry the breakfast show is the big flagship show right it's a bit of a double edged sword because you get given the kudos so it's downhill from here it is what are the days what are you going to do well actually I mentioned to my friend that I was coming on and he said ah with fish and he's very excited about that didn't mention you no fair enough why would you fish is the main one fish is the main one fish is very much the one that we all know.

6:58Vish is the Gianni Infantino of our set up. Well, that's bad enough. As big ideas. It's already terrible for my self-esteem that you sat me next to it. Why are you hitting me with Infantino? Very short. Bad ideas, bad trainers. That's what he means by that. Yeah, that's fair. Well, the thief... Oh. Actually, that was a genuinely horrible surprise. Vish, would you like me to be sick on them? Gianni Infantino has summoned senior leaders of FIFA to a crisis meeting in Rabat in Morocco today. I love the venue, by the way. Well, it's hilarious because Infantino has been in Morocco over the past week and Gianni's in trouble and yet he's got everyone else to come to him, which is brilliant.

7:39I am going to need you in Morocco. Yeah. Yeah, for all the shit I've sorted out. I'll fuck this up, so I'm going to need you in Morocco. I've been on the sweetest hashish possible. I've come up with some ideas. Presumably he's in Morocco because that's the co-venue for the next World Cup. Yes. So he's doing some kind of Tide me over type admin maybe. Well, I guess he knows they're onside. Oh, yeah. So it's a safe haven. Yeah. I wondered if he was just holed up in some Tangier opiate den. Yeah. Just trying to hide. Maybe he couldn't get home and he couldn't fancy the private jet back to his house.

8:12So he's in an M hotel. In a hotel in a junkyard dog t-shirt calling his partner saying, I don't think I'm going to make it. Can everyone please come to me? What is he going to be talking about? Presumably it's going to start with an apology. is it? Because everyone who's come out has said, we knew nothing about this. It's not that we don't agree. We don't. We just didn't know anything about it. He doesn't feel like a sorry guy to me. He doesn't. No. I don't think that sits comfortably. Today I feel sorry. I was there for that speech. Were you? Yeah. Really? It was very exciting in the room. You knew at the time, right?

8:45Well, yeah, because it was so insane. And it's the only room I've ever been in. It was a big room where you could that audible intake of breath from journalism. You can feel it in the room and people are like, what on earth is he saying? And more to the point, why is he saying it? And has he... Even on iTunes reviews. I think he doesn't... I guess he just doesn't consult with people. No. Apart from, you know, Trump acolytes. It will be exciting to see him as the new host of the Five Live Breakfast Show. He would ring the changes. First of all, timings. We know that Nagger is going to be doing the show.

9:24him and Naga together is a that'd be a great combo it's an explosion listen you would listen maybe not for a bit maybe not for well what I like about this is like this has all come out and pretty much every sort of football association they're going yeah he's in nightmare actually Prince Ali bin Hussein President of the Jordanian Football Association has accused FIFA of creating a situation which are much to blackmail Jordan is still apparently awaiting prize money from last year's Arab Cup which is of course organised by FIFA. He doesn't seem to pay his invoices. I love the idea of Gianni going, well, if you let me do this private equity investment, I'm giving him money.

10:02He can't have it both ways. He cannot have it both ways. It's all other places. US or cities, apparently they haven't received the money that they were promised. I think it was a million each. Maybe the democratic ones won't get it. How do they like it? How do you like it? How do you like it now? She's on the other foot now. It feels very difficult to see how Gianni proceeds from here. The knives are out. With the caveat that I gave yesterday, which is that the truly evil people can occasionally find a way, it's difficult to see how he gets out from under this, really. But he does have support still, though.

10:34Not in any meaningful way, because I think UEFA are the real power brokers, right? Yes, but I think if you look at the... It's quite a complicated process by which you get rid of him, if you get rid of him. And I don't think it's an absolute given that the numbers are there to oust him because it is different sort of within your federation as a federation saying, yeah, we don't like this. But coming up as an individual FA, for example, and saying, right, we want you out, it is just a bit punchier. And basically has offered quite a lot of money to them. So I don't know. So going back to the blackmail thing then.

11:14And he does have access to more. Yeah, exactly. I wonder if he does somehow, I managed to limp on until March. That would be the aim. What's your take, Vin? Well, the blackmail point is a good one because to some people it's blackmail, to others it's a bribe. Yeah, it's true. And I think it is important when you look at the global FAs and realise the individual needs are so different from the English FA and actually everyone who stood side by side in UEFA to a lot of other nations. And you see it across a lot of sports. It happens a lot in cricket as well, whereby cricket's top table. there are only about 10 or 12 actual governing bodies, but they can't vote anything through because everyone sides with the people with the most money.

11:59And it's primarily India, it's also England and Australia. But nothing ever really gets done, nothing ever really gets changed beyond what's put forward by the most powerful. The difference here is obviously the UEFA thing, as you said, Luke, but I just wonder about the process and how much truck there is for the process. I think it's important that because they had such a good World Cup, Rick, you were there, and it felt even from afar, and I'm sure on the ground, that it went so much better than some of the detractors, including us, thought it was going to go. And that is still in its favour.

12:31I think just to put meat on the bones of the UEFA point, I guess what I'm getting at is it wouldn't be hugely surprising for UEFA, whose current position is we will boycott any competition as long as this FIFA forward enterprise stands. They could extend that position to your position is now untenable. We are going to boycott any competition until you've at least find a way to manage your exit in whatever way we decide. Because the reason that UEFA have got so much power is obviously because they've got all the big players, all the big countries, all the big club teams, which isn't as relevant, but it is kind of still relevant in a way.

13:04And there's going to need to be at the very least some kind of bread broken and some kind of negotiations happening between them, right? I wonder how that would go down though if UEFA sort of wielded their power in that way, if they don't have the support of all of the other federations and individual FAs, and if the thing that they've asked for, which is the retraction of this proposal, has happened to then say, ah, no, what we actually meant was we want to get rid of you. It feels more personal, doesn't it? Yeah. Power brokers keep their feet on the throat sometimes. Like Seferin, the guys will be like, this is our chance now.

13:39Yeah, agreed. I mean, Seferin would love to get rid of him, but I just yeah my gut is he weathers this somehow and leaves until March and then leaves in March because the club season starts and everyone just starts focusing on the football again like they kind of did in the World Cup exactly that when the football's being played people spend a lot less time talking and worrying about this stuff and a lot of these characters have obviously got their own stories in trying to Al-Hassan for example a Jordanian head he's obviously tried to be had a fee for himself. He ran against Set Blatter back in the day.

14:15So all of these kind of like characters that are kind of appearing now are kind of like you sort of think this is, you know, it's almost like a bit of a, bit of a go at sort of saying, well, maybe I should be thought of as the new. Oh, definitely. You see it happen at this level. It happened with Starmer to Burnham. People who were coming out saying Starmer, you know, as soon as the writing's on the wall, yeah, he's got to go. He's got to go. They're going into Downstreet telling him, go. Well, it worked, Have you ever thought about little old me? Exactly. I think Sepp Blatter's come out and sort of put his support behind someone.

14:50And if you are that person, you must be fuming. It's the double-edged sword, isn't it? Not just someone, simply a woman. Yeah. That is what's going to make him most fuming. He's thrown his support behind the president of the Norwegian Football Federation, Lise Clavness. and Clemens spoke out about the World Cup being given to Qatar in 2022. She could also criticise Saudi Arabia for the 2034 World Cup as well. Has Seth Blatter kind of forgotten all of the things his lot did during his tenure? No, he hasn't. He simply found a way to be even more cynical and bitter about how his time came to an end and how much he hates Infantino.

15:29I mean, there's no way Seth Blatter should be allowed to get away with championing himself some kind of, you know, champion of women's rights all of a sudden. He just wants, he's just found Twitter quite late. He's got nothing going on. He wants more people to know that he was cleared of some of the charges. And he needs to stick it into Infantino to get there. He's also, like a lot of these guys, like Zhao Havelange, for example, he's just incredibly old. Zhao Havelange didn't die until he was north of 100. Like there was something about the truly evil that can just go and go and go. Yes. And they don't disappear.

16:04They're still in public life until they're like 90. It's what sustains them. Is it injections of young blood? It's monkey embryo. Genuinely, I think it might be. And monkey embryo. Plasma from young people. Yeah, it basically is that. Who's that guy who's trying to live forever? Brian Johnson. Yeah, he drinks his son's piss. Have I met him? He does, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's obsessed with his son's erections and stuff. And that actually is the acceptable face of what he does. That's the best thing. The best knows that they've most... In a hotel room. In French Church Street. Welcome to Dickie Tum Tum Hospital.

16:32He put little sensors on his penis to measure the amount of erections he had and how solid they were. Just make a note of them in your app on your phone. No, it's when he's asleep. It's when he's asleep. So it actually does make sense. And that's why I also have... A little kind of like... That's cheating if you're sleeping on your front. Well, I mean, we've obviously been reporting in our way. In our own way. In our own way, on the World Cup. but Ricky, you're obviously out there in the US for Football Daily. Is this whole kind of change in your kind of working circumstances just basically you saying, can I do it for me all of the time during the day?

17:14Yes, could I just work in Los Angeles at a sociable hour? At a reasonable time. With Lloyd Griffith. With Lloyd Griffith, yeah. When Rod Sharp used to do Overnights and they never said that he was abroad. They never said he was in America. He always sounded like he was having a good time as well. I'm Rod Sharp. so whereabouts in America was he I think he was in like the midwest I think weirdly and he would do 12 a.m. until 6 he'd go to DC though wouldn't he yeah when the sort of election season he'd be there but it sounded like he was having a fine old time he would never say he was on a decent time why would you what was the tournament like on the ground well as you mentioned as soon as it started all of the kind of worries dissipated and it was really yeah it was really fun and it went really well I mean there was stuff about it that was we kind of knew was going to be unusual like the demographic of the crowds yes the stadiums were full but you kind of had a situation where you had sort of 5 % of Team A's fans proper fans, 5 % of Team B's fans and then 90 % of people who were just quite up for it everyone's all mixed in as well Yeah, and so the atmosphere was slightly different, but not bad.

18:34And also the last World Cup was obviously in Qatar, also quite an unusual kind of atmosphere. So it was just different. But the American seemed to, largely because the Team USA had a great start, they really kind of bought into it. There was a bit of momentum. There was just positivity, I think, in the country for what was happening. I went to a bunch of games at the SoFi Stadium. That stadium is... It looks amazing. It's nuts. I must have gone four or five times, and every time when you sort of walk, the classic walk-in, you're like, good God, this is an insane building. Is that the one with the mad escalator that just goes up and you can sort of see more and more of the pictures you go up?

19:18There are... Oh, no. Well, if so, I didn't go on the escalator, so can't corroborate that either way. But it's the one with the incredible screen all the way around the stadium, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's costing like five billion to make, but you walk in and you go, yes, I can see why that costs five billion. They sort of dug it down a hundred foot so that it wouldn't interfere with the flight path to LAX. Like it's that giant. And yeah, the atmosphere, I mean, for, what was the game? Belgium-Iran, that for all sorts of reasons was quite an interesting game to go to. Iran's first game.

19:55and the atmosphere there the iranian fans were so loud like i don't i i yeah i've not been it i can't remember being in a louder stadium than that i mean partly i was going to be the the acoustics i suppose yeah but it was extraordinary um and then yeah it just sort of it it went much better i think than as you said a lot of people worried that it might and then it there was that turning point I think when with the with the Balogun red card and whatever went on with that and that was a real shame because it just felt like they kind of shut themselves in the foot a bit yeah because all of that positivity towards because I mean I was in LA that pretty much the whole time until the last week it's such a it's such a melting pot of of nationalities and so you could meet fans from from everywhere and by and large people were pretty uh up for team USA They're doing well.

20:51Our host nation, great. And then as soon as that overturning of the suspension happened, everyone just switched to, oh, well, I hope Team USA lose then. It became a big distraction for them as well. Yeah, I think so. And they were terrible in that game, actually. In a kind of way that wasn't commensurate to what they had done before as well. So it had to be a distraction. It had to be. Well, the way that the Americans seem to be talking, everyone interviewed just seemed to genuinely think that, Well, A, it shouldn't have been suspended. And also, we might win the World Cup. And you're like, well, one of those is valid.

21:29But that's one of the great things about Americans in sport, and I'd probably even throw in Australians with this as well, is that they will happily tell you that that is out of order, but it's happened, he's back, we're going to win it. They are such, you know, they're great frontrunners, and they're also great at thinking the world's against them when it's not. they're basically if you could get USA or Australia in the Premier League their fans would fit in perfectly honestly it's one of the things it's the kind of thing FIFA will look at yeah absolutely they might be discussing it right now did you go to any England games no no what was the standout game you went to it probably it probably was the Belgium-Iran game and then and then the final not not because the final was a good game of football, but I've never been to a World Cup final.

22:22Yeah, exactly. And that stadium is also nuts as well. It's such a sort of classic stadium. There's nothing sort of exotic about it. It's just a massive bowl. Yeah. And you pack a load of people in there. And the narrative, because of the way the Argentinians played, there was a sort of pantomime villain in there. Yeah, yeah. And yeah, that was just an amazing experience. Did you watch the England-Mexico game with other England fans? Yes. So that was in, we just went to a sort of open air screening. And that was, yeah, that was phenomenal. Although, actually, being around, I wasn't around England fans that much, but being around England fans, again, reminded me that sometimes England fans are really annoying.

23:13But you can't say that about Lloyd. He's not here to defend himself. No, no, but he would say it himself. Well, that's the thing, you kind of, especially because we had so much fun with the Scottish supporters, for example, and they just seemed like they were doing it the right way, and then you see the England fan, you're like... You've got a lot of self-hate in your heart. I do have a lot of self-hate in my heart. I do.

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26:12But it does look like Thomas Tuchel is going to be staying on as England manager beyond the summer. What was your take on the dreaded Argentina match, Rick? Because did the France playoff give you any... No, I mean... Any croissants for port? People lost their mind about that. I didn't watch the France playoff because I don't care. Like, I literally don't care. It could have been any... We could have won like 15-0. I still wouldn't have cared. I almost did. I know, but I just... I didn't get why people were sort of reading stuff into. Playing against a team who very clearly don't want to be there.

26:43And in the first half, as far as I can tell, didn't really try. No, they didn't. But there were like serious journalists online at the time going, well, this is damning for Tuchel. It's really damning for Tuchel. I would love to have been in the French dressing room at half time hearing Deschamps saying, you do realise this is my last game. And I've achieved quite a lot here. You cannot let us, we cannot go out like this. And obviously they come out in the second half and do okay. Deshaun was probably like, can you just put that out while I'm talking? Just light it up. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Someone's put a sock over the fire alarm while he's talking.

27:14Where did he get Cigarillo from? I thought it was an odd timing of the deal to give Thomas Tuchel that extended contract before the line. I don't know why. Same with the Scotland manager. They've made that mistake so many times, the English effort. But it must have been because the agent was on manoeuvres saying, you know, Man United this and you're going to lose him kind of thing. And the FA were like, oh shit, we can't fumble this. But I just think they get excited. World Cup, yay! World Cup forever! And I think they fear, particularly with someone like Tuchel and his history, that he might not be fully committed to that World Cup if he is looking elsewhere.

27:48There was obviously that worry with him at Chelsea at the end of his tenure. Yeah, sorry, you were saying, but yeah, absolutely mindless to extend it for two years. Yeah. But broadly happy with the decision just for continuity's sake? I would like it to be, as I said to you before, at the risk of casting myself as some kind of xenophobic buffoon. I think it should be an English person doing it. Who's out there? I don't know. Eddie Howe. But I also think that they had an opportunity. Well, Eddie Howe is out there now. He is out there. He's at large. He's at large. He's at large. With Jason Tindall.

28:21You're thinking of Eddie Large. One for the teenagers there. Jason Tindall as assistant manager of England would be quite something. That would be great. But I do think, as I said at the time, there's an opportunity with what Southgate achieved to have brought a proper assistant through the same way Germany done in the past. Yeah, other nations have done it in the past. Now, some people will come back to me and say, well, that was Lee Carlsson. He wasn't suitable for it. And my response to that would just be, yeah, well, Lee Carlsson wasn't suitable for it because he was the under 21s coach and he clearly wasn't ready for the job.

28:51But they could have established some continuity rather than just gone with a big name who cost a lot of money. And I think further evidence for that direction is... Luis de la Fuente. Or Lionel Scaloni, who is exactly the same situation and won it the time before. So it was there for England. They went after Tuchel. They've obviously been a little bit held to ransom by him as well. But I mean, we've been covering this game for a long time and the FA was going to be the FA, right? I'm not sure what else you can do about it, really. Back to your xenophobic position. Yeah. Would you have had a problem if...

29:24Would you have enjoyed it less if England had won the World Cup because there was a German manager? Because I definitely wouldn't. I would have absolutely loved that I think I would have loved it yeah I think it's impossible and if anyone said anything against him I would have gone mad yeah he would have been Sir Thomas Tuchel by the end of the day basically but no yeah I take that point I do think with the idea that the managers should be of the same nationality of the players that falls down as an argument when you get down to kind of very very curacao levels yeah because they're clearly not going to maybe have any options and it makes it tough for them well like England yeah basically but Eddie Howe is at large I'd love it if they called Eddie Howe and he said, I can't do it, but I've got a mate for you and it's Tindall.

30:04That'd be great. How would that work with presumably all his travel bans? Yeah, I'm not sure. I'm not sure. Every waiter is buying a hooky gear. In a new shell suit every week. He's asked to be paid in vapes. He said he was driving to Spain for the nation's life. He doesn't want to stay in the team hotel. He wants to stay in a place called Dickie Tum Tum. It's a great hotel. Maritza Pochettino speaking of the US side. He signed a new contract extension through to the 2030 World Cup. I love the state of Pochettino at this moment in time because his head's got really big. He's got great hair at the moment.

30:39Well, it's a Russell Crowe thing, isn't it? Yeah. Also, his outfits were nice. He's got a sort of casual suit. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wonder, I mean, I'm probably guessing at this point, but I wonder how much of that is to do with what seems to be a lot of vacancies coming into the summer are now all taken. Yeah. And there was nothing really there out there for him that he'd want to do. I thought it was nailed on he'd leave after the World Cup. I thought it's like the chance to be a national manager at a home World Cup is a massive thing. That's gone now. Yeah. And I also think a lot of those managers, we've just been talking about the new Mourinho documentary and how obsessed he is with the work.

31:16And for a lot of managers who are used to that day-to-day thing, I mean, it's basically a part-time job for the most part. So it's interesting that he's satisfied with that. I guess there are probably several million reasons why he is, but at this point in his career, it's a surprising one, right? Yeah, I think so. And also, he was not massively popular with the job he was doing in the US. But he did then look like he kind of turned it around until they had him in this World Cup. And I think, yeah, the feeling towards him got much more positive. I guess that's probably a factor. But I wouldn't...

31:52I mean if you said to me do you think he's going to be in charge of Team USA at the next World Cup I'd say probably not I think another opportunity will come up and for the reasons you've given I don't think he necessarily wants to be a part time manager there's an element of it particularly if it's not a big nation and obviously the US is literally a big nation but in terms of football it's not that you just feel like you're being forgotten about particularly if you're not involved with any kind of UEFA competition or whatever I mean in the crucible of football which of course is Europe these days no one is paying attention to the US national team results he could win every single game and it still probably wouldn't raise his status any higher would it?

32:33No, yeah I suppose that's true he does a lot of media as well doesn't he between tournaments which speaks to wanting to keep himself relevant and stuff like that I did an interview for a job doing something, who was it for? I probably shouldn't say actually but you can probably work it out I'll say it the Club World Cup GB News went really well I've had to leave five blood breakfast fingers crossed for you I mean you're a shoo-in I can hope so I don't need the money and in the course of the interview the guy said do you and how across the MLS are you and obviously said well not at all yeah and he said well you don't watch any of it and I was like no why on earth would I watch that and he was like well you kind of need to be a bit across it I was like I don't think well I completely disagree I don't think I do need to be across it I can pretend to be if you want to but I'm never going to sit down and watch that are you mad did you get the interview no I didn't get the job no I didn't get the job who would they go with that I don't know actually I don't know yeah someone who loves the MLS or at least he's prepared to say that's the lesson learned there is just go Yeah, I love Inter-Miami.

33:53They've had a really good season, have they? They miraculously qualify for the Club World Cup. That rivalry with AC Miami, lucky. Can't beat it. Apparently, the men's national team manager, funding for the actual job, it all comes down to a one-billionaire hedge fund manager, Ken Griffin. He's quite a charitable chap by his Wikipedia. He's got a Wikipedia. But the most important thing is he's got a section on this Wikipedia page that just is titled a dinosaur. Did he buy a dinosaur? He bought a stegosaurus skeleton for$44 million. It was the highest priced fossil ever sold at auction. What's he done with it?

34:31Don't know. Don't know. Would you not... Giving it to Monsieur Pochettino, apparently. Would you not wait for another T-Rex? Yeah. Oh, what? I think he thinks it's one for the heads, this. No, I'm a stegosaurus guy. I always have been. Yeah. Right, right. Okay. Are the spikes bones or are just keratin? How does it work? It's not bone anymore, I'll tell you that much. So when you go to the Natural History Museum, you're a science guy, when you go to the Natural History Museum, and there's a big T-Rex there, what is that actually made of? Minerals, innit? Well, yeah, it'd be just basically stone at this point.

35:05Or it would be a reproduction, more likely. And they'll tell you which parts have been reproduced. Yeah. Pipes. Pipes. the stegosaurus has a very small brain I know that because my young son is obsessed with making me read the same dinosaur book again and again and again in a way that I think Ken Griffin would enjoy we've got the stegosaurus page again Ken give me some more money sounds less like a kid's book more on a diss track of the stegosaurus story he'd just turn the page this dumb cunt again my girlfriend from Scotland there's quite a few of them that are absolute morons I'm afraid I'm afraid to say they all own NFL teams I remember going to the zoo once and the zookeeper was very into telling us how shit leopards were really shit leopards and cheaters rubbish thick animals they run so fast they die I remember being at a zoo once and someone who worked there saying that the exact wording was something like and that is why giant pandas have quite simply been selected for extinction.

36:13They no longer deserve to live because of the choices they've made, how evolution has taken them. Because they refuse to eat the food they're supposed to eat. They won't eat and they won't bang. No, exactly. What do you want? Yeah, exactly. Do one of those things. Harv Renard, a friend of, not friend of the show, but certainly a cultural touchstone and a friend of Marcus Beller. In on the series tomorrow? That'd be a good booking. Yeah, it would. he's returned to the Ivory Coast as their head coach just over a decade after winning the Africa Cup of Nations with them in 2015. It's quite romantic, isn't it?

36:48The way that Harv and I just sort of saunters around Africa picking up a job. That's definitely a word for it. I'm speaking as his accountant. What I like is that Marcus loves him because I think Marcus thinks that's how you're supposed to dress. Right. Do you know what I mean? Like a kind of Mills and Boone sort of character. He looks like a Mills and Boone. He always wears that same white shirt with the pleats in the back and he opens it up. And then there was that time when he carried an injured player off the pitch. In a very romantic way, actually. He shouldn't have kissed him. Yeah, well, that's for you.

37:19We don't know that he didn't. We don't know that, no. Any comments on how of Renard? Anything you've got to add to that? No, all good. Just going to say something about his shirt, really. So, yeah, that he covered it off. He's just a man in his shirt, isn't he? Done it for you. Obviously, we had Jamie Carragher on the show yesterday, was it? I forget when things get started. It must be good to miss him out by a day because you're a big Liverpool guy. Yeah, but I'm never good with that sort of situation. I've embarrassed myself in front of Trent Alexander-Arnold. I've embarrassed myself in front of Jürgen Klopp at the World Cup.

37:50We're going to need to hear about him. Well, Trent Alexander-Arnold, 2022, in Qatar, interviewed him and at the end just said, oh, I love you, by the way. That's all right, isn't it? Just pathetic. And then basically I did exactly the same thing to Jürgen Klopp after he said, no, I don't want to talk to you. Did you? I chased after the World Cup final. Never run after someone. I saw him in the broadcast compound and sort of jogged after him in my little BBC Five Live mic and said, Jürgen, a couple of words for the BBC? And he said, no. And I said, it doesn't matter. I'm a Liverpool fan, so I love you anyway, so you don't have to talk to me.

38:24And off I went. I like that because it's needy. Yeah. It's everything you want. It's everything you want. Did you hear what Pete said? Pete is a veteran of many Isle of Wight festivals interviewing a lot of Indian artists. Yeah, yeah, just, yeah. Different levels. His instinct was straight away, that's not that bad. That's not that bad. Ask him by George whether he's having the chicken or the fish. He goes, I'm a vegetarian. Like, just like that. But I was proved right after the week he's had. Yeah, he's not a cracker, has he? What's he done now? He's made an AI song. A pro-Israel AI song. Yeah.

38:55No, let me top that one off. A pro-Israel reggae song using AI. Someone described it as a kind of sentence that every word is a surprise and not in a good way. Have you heard? I presume you played out a bit of it. It doesn't sound like his voice. We did not play any of it. No, okay, right. Yeah, it's a good point, actually. So Boy George was a low point for you in terms of the old embarrassing interviews? Yeah, just any of the red carpet ones. They're all as hell, aren't they? What was the one, I think it was also on the red carpet, the one that's on YouTube and it's three seconds long, but it was put up by your employer.

39:29Oh, yeah, I can't remember what it was, but I just said, I said, my lady by accident. I said, hello, m 'lady. And then it just stops. It's not Katie Tunstall, but I feel like she's Katie Tunstall adjacent. I think it's the one who does table manners. Jesse Ware. I think it was Jesse Ware. I think you could call Jesse Ware m 'lady. I'm here with m 'lady. And then the video just stops. For the energy. We're trying to get some of that sweet vine money. The energy is very kind of walking into a pub and calling the barmaid a serving wench. Pretty M 'lady. That kind of thing, right? M 'lady. M 'lady.

40:10Absolutely terrible. I'm glad I didn't see J.B. Carragher is the point. Because I would have called him M 'lady or something. When we had Carragher on, the first reaction of... You're calling him Carragher now? Yeah. Absolutely pathetic. We've changed. I've embarrassed myself. We used to be the indie darlings. The majority of the people who listen to this show genuinely thought it was you doing an impression of him. Yeah. Nice. they would rather leap to that than the idea we could ever get character on the shots Sam said on Instagram no way how did you get Jim Campbell I know you that's good should we do some transfers gents it's kind of been you've said we will I've set the agenda and I'm going to fulfil that agenda by saying that Tiani Rinders has reportedly emerged as a transfer target for Nottingham Forest Rinders is reportedly open to the move City want 60 odd million for it and isn't that pretty much what they paid anyway why would he want to do that then?

41:03Because they've signed Elliot Anderson, I guess. Because he didn't play that much last season, I suppose. And when he did play, he was a bit poo. He was a real well. He had such a good start. He started really well. Such a good start. He's got a lovely smile, but he's very weak in the tackle. Really exciting at the start, it was. Presumably because Forrest needs some replacement and he feels like he's gone even further down the pecking order, right? Yeah, and there's also that thing that probably we don't, really see because we're in the Premier League but playing in the Premier League is still a huge deal regardless of whether the drop-off is say Man City to Forrest and I suppose if that is a permanent deal I mean what does it matter anymore he could probably also then go somewhere else next season but it feels like the gap the vacancy they have for him or the vacancy Forrest having their midfield suits what Rinders does he'll play all the games you know he I think he's also going to to be the way that forest play he's going to be they're going to lean upon someone who will take the ball out of defense and drive with it if they want play with gibbs why there's a lot of excitement if you're a forest fan but yeah rick i'm not too far away from your point in terms of why like he was you know he's enjoying the high life he could probably still go to an equivalent champions league club in europe but maybe it's about staying in the premier league then yeah and also for a city they're going to play so many games in a season it's not like you're not going to play if you're him I wouldn't have thought whenever I speak to a Man City fan he's one of the players that they go I'm bored of looking at him he's really been quite bored and that's what football's all about that's what football's all about so maybe you know new manager comes in and goes sorry why's this guy here he doesn't do anything off the ball Arsenal fans with Zubimendi he starts really well brilliant now fuck him yeah who cares get rid of him but again he does have a killer smile the interesting thing is I suppose from a player's point of view you will know whether it's through actively seeking it out or just people mentioning if the fans aren't on Avenue anymore and that probably is a factor or the new manager the new manager in there that might move the dial as well that's clearly it's not the only reason but that will have moved the dial for kind of Rodri as well Rodri's telling Man City he wants to go to Real Madrid that's got to be partly because of Pep and Rodri had a had quite a poor first season so maybe he could turn it around Jeremy Carragher Cara our friend Cara JC JC not in Marcus not because Marcus likes Jesus yeah I thought you were saying because of Jim Campbell so many JC's that I like there's three JC's on this show already also a carpenter's son I guess you'd have to rank them yeah yeah you would you would it's a really good point that Jim Campbell is genuinely a carpenter's son isn't it yeah is he We could do a little bit after the show.

43:52Blind rank, JC. Yeah, different tiers of GCs. You still need to go up with a couple more, I think. Well, Jimmy Cricket died yesterday. He did, yeah. That'll do. Jennifer Connelly. There we go. Jimmy Carr. Jimmy Carr. There's a lot of GCs around. Do people kind of subconsciously sort of go with the Jesus kind of vibe? Jimmy Carr would be at the bottom for me. Well, hang on, you haven't heard the others yet. I don't care where they are. Who's a really bad JC? Do you know why Jimmy Carr would be bottom for me? Jimmy Cunningham. Because you don't like him? No, because, yeah, partly, but because he keeps doing like serious stuff when he's supposed to be doing stand-up.

44:25And to me, it feels like that's the opposite of what you're supposed to be doing. Oh, get back in your boxes, yeah. No, it's like, if you get up and people have paid to see you do some stand-up, I don't want to hear 10 minutes of you telling a young person that they could just work harder and, you know, be really good and their life will be fine. It's like, do a joke. Everyone's got 24 hours in the day, that kind of stuff. I love all that. Yeah, it does a lot of that. That's what you're going to be doing next, isn't it? I hope so, yeah. but also he could just do he could just do a TED talk about it if he wanted he could just do that keep that separate is that what people in your profile have gotten access to if they want to anytime you can just go TED talk please well I have done a TEDx talk so is that not as good is that not as good well it's basically the same thing mate why do they call it TEDx then huh don't know not sure people we know seem to always do the TEDx as well that's all I'm saying yeah you won't know anyone who's done a TED talk or not really you might have met them elsewhere Fedobashi are interested in signing Marcus Rashford from Manchester United.

45:19He's still inexplicably still a Manchester United player. And that would be an underwhelming move for one of Marcus's favourite players, Fish. And one of my favourite players. I think very similar to the Jones sadness of losing a local player. It's obviously a little bit different when he's on about 300 grand a week. And there's been so many times with Rashford over the last five years where it feels like he's on the way out, he comes back in, oh, this is quite promising and then he ends up being turfed out again. I would be really, really sad if he goes. I think he should go. There's a bit of goodwill hunting about it in that like, I don't really want to see you back here.

45:58I love that you're here, but you shouldn't be here. Go off and do other things. This has stunted your growth for a long time. Do you think the United fans would accept him back? I think so, because it'd be a nice story and I feel like similar with Carrick coming back at the end of last season and some of the moves that Manchester United have made this summer in terms of actually not you know no no real nonsensical moves i know you talked about talked about the adeniro santos transfer on tuesday's show but you know they've been fairly sensible i think with that and if you fold in the emotion around rashford and say like you know he starts the first three games well suddenly it feels like a completely different club because all the component parts of a good story are there and i think people are all in for that but we know and we've seen it in the past that it doesn't quite work like that with Rashford.

46:46And the problem is, and you mentioned it there, the problem is his wages. Like the fact that Fenerbahce are interested in signing him is because of the way they can finance deals in Turkey. And he's had a good, he's had an okay season for where he's been playing and the team he's been playing in. He had his moments for sure at Barcelona. Yeah. And I think he was really disappointed that he didn't want to keep it. He would command the most successful side, wouldn't he? Yeah, and there's absolutely a place for that in Man United's current setup, in the way that they play, in the way they need to rotate their wide players because they get through so much work.

47:10It's not too dissimilar to how England used him at the start of the World Cup in terms of just come on and run at a knackered defender. There's space to do that, especially given how many more games United are playing this season. So I would love to see him back. I hope he's not there at the start of the season. But I want to move better than Fenerbahce. I love the fact that even with all of kind of modern football approaches and tactics, bringing a fast player on to run at knackered defenders is still absolutely one of your main weapons. You know what, Rick? England should have done it against Argentina.

47:43That's the thing. In the World Cup semi-final, if England are brought on Saka and Rashford. I don't think you can say that like it's a massive revelation that you've just come up with. No, no, I'm not. But it's relevant to your point. And that's generally how conversations do flow. Yeah, yeah. But I think your delivery was, here's an idea. We should have brought on some attacking players. Why did no one think of that? A month later as well. Yeah, yeah. But your point stands. I mean, it's like, if you give the other team something to think about, particularly late in a game, it's a real leveler.

48:11It's a total leveler. But the thing, to go back to the Argentina game, the thing that Tuchel did was, it was almost like he had two options, fast or tall, and he went with tall. Yeah, he did. It was like a choose-your-own-adventure. It's bringing us on, basically, which is never a good idea. Well, former Manchester United winger, Jadon Sancho's been spotted training with 10th-tier non-league side, Flixton FC. The club have confirmed that he wasn't on trial with the club. And they were not involved in any transfer discussions. we don't think we can meet your wage demands was that them going like we're not interested actually but yeah now I suppose like well he's a free agent right he's a free agent I suppose yeah and he thought to himself I can do better than Turkey yeah hello Flixton I'll join you in the Northwest Counties League if you don't mind very much thank you very much yeah it's a sad story though it is a sad story he needs to play he needs to find somewhere he can do that he didn't he wasn't like terribly bad at Villa for parts when he came well you thought he was going to turn it around a little bit.

49:10Yeah. I felt like it was some positive from it, right? Yeah. He's never going to be the player that he was at Borussia Dortmund. What do you think's realistic for him then? Also, why? Like, it's frustrating, isn't it? I mean, for him probably as well. I wonder if he's just comfortable. And I think that's totally fine for him. And we can lament that because of the joy he brought when he had that stint at Dortmund. And as a Manchester United fan, it was annoying that he forked out 79 million for that kind of player and it just doesn't come to fruition. But again, I wouldn't, you know, it's a basket case.

49:44You can almost discount that. But yeah, I don't know. I don't think it's in the Premier League. It might be in somewhere like other parts of Europe. Italy would be good, right? I think the pace of play in Italy is where he, I think he can really go back to the creator that he was in the Bundesliga. But I don't know if he's happy, then go to Saudi, go to Turkey and, you know, have a good life. But he's at Flixton. Well, no, no. I mean, he's at Flixton because he clearly lives nearby and it's just, you know, easy to get the access to it. It'll be a lovely old job if you're kind of training at Flickston, you know, and you're in the first squad and James Sanchez suddenly turns up.

50:18Do you think with all the money he has, he wants to be anywhere near them? Oh, he trades alone? He's in the bomb squad. He's in the Flickston bomb squad. But the bomb squad is above the main squad. I've basically hired it out for a big wedding and the only attendee is me. Well, he reportedly has agreements in principle with several clubs in Europe, Saudi Arabia and the Middle East. VIP booth free with a bottle of Belvedere but do you not think that so that's obviously been put out by his agent and that just says look he's got loads of options he doesn't like any of them so make them as interesting as you can make him an interesting offer he'll definitely find somewhere the way football works is when you've got that kind of experience and that kind of eye-catching stuff under your belt there's always going to be a manager who's going to be egotistical enough to go I can get it out of him I can change him I can change him Exactly.

51:06Every manager sort of thinks that way. They do, exactly, because they have to back themselves, don't they? Apart from Eddie Howe. I'm done with this. I can't have another one. I can't have another one with Joel Lindman. It's too cute. Well, finally, Phil Collins' son, Matthew, has joined 1860 Munich from Austria-Solzburg. It's a new story that has been everywhere. I think I've seen this covered more than like Vinnie Junior's movements and Bruno Gimeraes' movements there this week. but I just hope that he does that legendary thing do you know like that video of Phil Collins during In The Air tonight at a festival or something and he's dressed like an IT professional he's got the earpiece and the British mic I'm talking about the Cadbury's advert and he's sort of walking around sort of stalking the stage and at the last minute he just sits at the drums and goes I don't mind that it's basically how Messi plays isn't it hopefully Phil Collins son Matthew can do that for 860 Munich drum kit in the centre circle when we know what's coming in.

52:05That's a really good idea. And I thought it was going to be terrible as soon as you started that. Yeah. But I like it. Thank you. Phil Collins' other contribution to football, as admittedly tangential as it is, is in 2008 when Stephen Gerrard, according to a report in The Guardian, which I dug out, quote, totally lost it after a DJ in a Southport nightclub refused to play and requested Phil Collins' track. Oh, yeah. He punched him, didn't he? It was in the gap between Christmas and New Year. and it was and Liverpool were having a good season and he just worried that it was going to derail it and he was going to get sent to jail he was cleared of a freight and assault though I should say after what you just specifically said there I mean there's CCTV footage of it yeah he basically said to the DJ keep the tunes coming and he went don't fucking say that we hate that that's what the Nought system is for was it noted at any point what specific Phil Collins track it was no but I was thinking in light of that news about his son I wish I knew some more Phil Collins songs.

53:03I just don't know any. Sudio. That's a classic. Take a look at him now. Take a look at him now, exactly. Against all odds, against all odds as well. He doesn't like paying tax, just like Lionel Messi. Yeah, there we go. We're going to keep that in, aren't we? Does Phil Collins not like paying tax? Yeah, didn't he say he was in a tax exile, wasn't he? The only thing that people... They all are, aren't they? They all tax exile, aren't they? We'd all do it if we could. The only thing people say about Phil Collins consistently is that he was rumoured to have divorced his wife by fax. People always say that.

53:32Yeah, apparently it was a misnomer. Oh, was it? Okay, it didn't happen. Okay, there we go. Anyway, thank you for listening. Does Salah not get a mention? Who? Salah off to Turkey. Yeah, that doesn't get a mention. We talked about it yesterday. Fine. What do you want to say about it? Nothing. It's your show as well. Nothing. Are you happy with how that's linking up in the league that's going to bring us a little bit of, oh God, might be James Sancho, might be Marcus Rashford. Might be, yeah. Could be all of them doing it there. No, I didn't want to say anything. I just wanted to check. Okay, right.

54:00Shit, we haven't missed it. You've brought a topic in. Yeah. Just check the carer dealt with it. I'm happy. In your next interview, when they ask, do you watch the Turkish Super League? Just say yes. You'll say yes. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. We'll be back with Film Club, Pete's Film Club, tomorrow. If you haven't watched Will Ferrell's finest hour kicking and screaming yet, then do so now. See you then.

54:32Thank you, Rick. No, thank you. That was a really, that was a really, really nasty little afterthought. Yeah. Felt cruel. Thanks for taking the time. The Football Ramble is a Stack production and part of the Acast Creator Network.

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