The Preview Show: Thomas Tuchel's Chocolate Factory

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3:03Luke Moore: This is for the G's and the Hustlers, everybody. Welcome to the Football Ramble Preview Show. Wales, Ireland and Northern Ireland crash out of World Cup qualification. It's Friday 27th March. I'm Marcus Speller. I'm Jim Campbell. And I'm Luke Moore.

3:27Luke Moore: Hello, everybody. It's Friday. It is a slightly solemn Friday in the kingdom, of course, because two of our brave bunches of boys are out of World Cup qualification. We need to strike a sombre tone for the next hour or so. Well, we'll try and pick it up. I mean, England are playing tonight in a crucial friendly. So it is still a preview show. It is still a preview show. Ha, ha, we've got them. The Trades Description Act bunch are... We will be previewing a game at some point that perhaps many, many people don't care about. Oh. Which is disappointing. Who are these people? You should be... This is the thing.

4:02We will get on to Wales and to Northern Ireland and all the rest of it. But I do think, you know, I saw a little bit of negativity yesterday around England playing tonight. Oh. because there's just a general bit of rhetoric and people are falling into that kind of old trope of oh another England friendly no no no this is the these are the key friendlies now this is where the World Cup starts now

4:28Marcus Bean: this is the dojo it is absolutely the 80s dojo that like dads in the 80s really got into karate for some reason and started opening dojos is that yeah and BL's is there yes and what more do you want Jim I think you've won everybody over there he's just previewed the preview Exactly, yeah. Lovely teaser trailer, Jim. The trade description, just go home. Just go home. You can't get it. Stop coming for us. Exactly. We've left the EU now. Brexit means Brexit. We don't want any more trade descriptions.

4:54Luke Moore: Stop gloating. Welcome to the gold medal show. It's what we want. It's what we want. Welcome to the donkey show. Yeah, gold donkey show. Exactly. There we go. Right, and let's start with Wales. They drew one all with Bosnia-Herzegovina, but of course lost 4-2 on penalties. They miss out on World Cup qualification. they will not be playing Italy in that final playoff. Of course, it's a sick-ner for Wales, an absolute sick-ner. Where do you begin, Jim? I suppose maybe the penalty shootout. I would begin earlier than that.

5:26Marcus Bean: Would you? The birth of Craig Bellamy. The birth of Craig Bellamy. In 1984. And then I would take a huge, huge time jump right up to the beginning of this match. And I think all three, obviously we're going to look at Wales, Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland, and they've all gone out in unfortunate fashion. I think this might be the hardest one to take because Wales are really, really attacking in this game. They really, really took it to Bosnia. They hit the bar twice. And obviously Bosnia had some chances themselves. Carl Darlow had to make a really, really good save. But they did everything they promised to do.

6:02Marcus Bean: They did everything Craig Bellamy asked of them. And they were just so unlucky to be kind of essentially pegged back by the immortal Edin Dzeko. and Sikner is right because you look at that and thought they were brilliant. They played really, really well. It was fine margins that mean they're not going through to face Italy. They should have won the game. Yeah. They should have won the game.

6:21Luke Moore: Ed Njeko said after the game that he felt that Bosnia hurt the governor with a rightful win. Ed Njeko plays for Bosnia though. Yeah. You've got to remember that. I don't play for either of these nations so I'm more neutral. Right. I haven't got a drop of Welsh blood in me nor Bosnian. Right. So you can trust me. Yeah. Welsh should have won the game. What is your blood type, eh? Not sure. Actually, I've got the really rare one.

6:41Marcus Bean: Zed. No, I can't remember what it is. I actually don't know what mine is. And I have a very mild condition that means my blood clots quite slowly. So I really should know what it is. And I can't remember what it is. Don't you normally have it written on the inside of your bulletproof vest? When you're out and about?

6:59Luke Moore: For English people, you've always got type A, type B, type Irish. They're your options, really. yeah I think I'm AB negative or something that's apparently the rarest main blood type yeah why are we talking about this because you said you didn't have a drop of Welsh blood I don't because I was keen to know what type of blood you had I think if you watch that game you would agree with me that Wales made all the look Wales got themselves into the position to have the home tie yes and they put and Bosnia are a beatable team we have to be clear about that and it was one of those nights as Jim said but it just didn't quite happen for them but I don't think you know Bellamy's comments themselves would probably suggest this as well.

7:38There's a huge amount of regrets, it's just one of those regrets that are not going to be going to the next phase, of course, but it's not like they chuck six behind the ball, don't try and try and nick one, or play for penalties or something. They tried to win the game and they held on for a long, old time, and on another day, they would have scored more than one. I do think the Dan James goal is fortunate. I don't think it's as good as everyone says it is. And the keeper has to save that. Oh, come on. The keeper has to save that.

7:59Marcus Bean: Yeah, but he doesn't, and it's a glorious moment. It's a great hit on the whole thing. Not the bottom line's making though, Jimmy. Sure, but. It's a great half-volley. I'm pleased that he scored it, and I'm pleased for Wales, broadly. It's a lovely goal, but it's one of those goals you have to admit that when you first see it, you go, fucking what a goal. Then you watch it again, you go, okay. Yeah, but I think James only hits it from there because the keeper's out, right? So I think you surely got to factor that in. He's so slow to react.

8:22Luke Moore: I think from James' point of view, it's a great goal. From the goalkeeper's point of view, he would think that if he had his time again, he would do a bit better. That's too diplomatic. Are you Team Campbell or Team Moore? Are you Luke Nation, or are you Jim Barbway? Well, look, I think I've made myself very clear on that point. Did you threaten to overrule the minister? Michael Howard, did you threaten to overrule the minister? I'm not going to be dragged into this again. I've said what I've said, all right? And history will judge me. Look, it's a good... I'm not going the other way by saying...

8:50Order! I'm not going the other way by saying it's a shit goal to be, like, competitive. I just don't think it's as good a goal as everyone's saying it is. I get what you're saying.

8:58Luke Moore: It's not sort of kissing the bar into the top corner perfectly. For me, a goal from that distance, you have to look at it again and go, no keeper in the world is saving. But I think, though, when all said and done, for that goal to be the goal that opens the scoring, to hit it in such a manner in which he did, probably catches the keeper off guard. So you've got to do that. It's a fabulous goal from James and Wales' point of view. And with that home advantage as well, the crowd were up for it, as we've come to know over many years now with the Wales national team. You did think they were going to go on and win it.

9:28Luke Moore: When Dan James is deflected and hits the bar, the tails are up. But I do think, though, in that second half, you have to say that Bosnia-Herzegovina were also very much in the tie. They grew into the game, yeah. And at times I thought they had much more better control of it than Wales did. But look, right at the end, if you fast forward to extra time, right at the end of extra time, Bosnia-Herzegovina were hanging on for penalties. And could they get through? And there was that moment, wasn't there, when Brennan Johnson, I actually thought he perhaps should have gone for goal, but although I get what he was doing.

9:59He heads back across the goal.

10:00Luke Moore: and it's agonising. Even when it went to penalties, I thought Wales are not going to be denied here. And Darlow saves the first one. And Bellamy said after the game, he said, we practice penalties. And you know what? Bellamy's a proper student of the game. Whether he was before, he certainly is now, without a doubt. And I think we've all enjoyed Bellamy as Wales manager and the way he's conducted himself. But he said with that penalty shootout, he said, we did our homework. We did everything right. And he said, and when the goalkeeper saves the first one, I thought we're on for it here. And he said, I'm just scratching.

10:28Luke Moore: He said, I don't believe in luck, but I'm just, I can't remember the exact words he said, but I was scratching my head going, what else could we have done to win that penalty shootout? So it's all out on the field for them. I think Craig Bellamy is, I know what you meant. Craig Bellamy is the acceptable face and manner of self-improvement.

10:48Marcus Bean: Yeah. He's got a little soup song of the Jake Humphrey, Liam Rosina gene, but he bludgeons you over the head with it and he's so straight talking that it doesn't annoy you.

11:01Luke Moore: So that part of it is a little bit more from yesteryear, good old-fashioned stuff. But he is a product of his own environment, so there is a little dollop of... Well, you mean, I will give you some motivational stuff, but please be warned that the golf club might come out. Possibly. Yeah. You know, a bit like yourself these days. A towering golf stick. Yeah, yeah. I think the real mischance, the head across the goal is a good point to reference. I don't know why, I can't remember who the forward was, but I don't know why he just didn't throw himself. because it was really close. Yeah, you know, it's like trying to judge where it's going to go.

11:31There was a moment before that where Harry Wilson gets the freedom of the penalty area and for some reason takes up two or three touches. If he just rifles that first time, that's a goal.

11:40Marcus Bean: Yeah, maybe. I wonder if that was one of those where the chance was never truly open for him when you watch it back.

11:47Luke Moore: But possibly, Jimmy, it is one of those ones where, yeah, if you actually had, you know, a camera which you could see it through his eyes. Imagine that. like cameras in his head. That's the future. Contact lenses. We'll get the Google Glass. Ref counts just to start. He should have the Herman Burgos on. Exactly, yeah. So we could see. Something for you to think about, UEFA. Oi, probably the only place you'll get the highlights. Well, I was about to say, and while I'm here, UEFA, why do you make it so difficult? Because I have a login to the UEFA.com and it takes me about five minutes to find you.

12:20Luke Moore: Anyway, ooh, one minute, 30 highlights of this 5-4 thriller. Brilliant. Yeah. Why would people want to watch this product? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what they're saying. I know, I know. Yeah, with Wilson, it could have been one of those ones, as you said. I think it's such a shame for Wilson in particular, having had such a great season, to have been able to go on and play in the World Cup would have just been, would have been marvellous, but it wasn't to be, sadly. Edin Dzekker, though, you can't deny him out a goal at international level. Yeah, there's that amazing stat

12:46Marcus Bean: during the rounds, isn't there, that this is the 20th year in a row he scored a goal in international football. Wow. Well, he's 40 ,000, was he? Yeah. Yeah, he's just evergreen. That goal was an absolutely textbook modern goal. Yes. It's a whipped corner. It's really hard to understand. So is that a modern goal nowadays? It is, isn't it? It used to be an old-fashioned goal. It is, but now it's modern again. How about that? There's about 94 people on the near post. Post-modern? Like, it's like, yeah. It's basically the front post in corners these days is like a Slipknot gig. Technically. And whoever can jump up the highest and avoid the bottles of piss can just put the fucking board in there.

13:18Mother's right. Well, equal shit. Yeah.

13:23Exactly. Who scored it? Joey Jordison.

13:26Luke Moore: Oh, dear. It was one of those ones where the last person you want it to fall for. But there's a reason why he has so many goals at international level. And it was a signal for Wales. But look, they still rallied, but they couldn't do it, sadly. But after the game... What about Brendan Johnson's penalty miss? Don't go after the game. Has he not suffered enough? I think it's important to say that that was a really poor penalty. Good players can miss penalties. He's not a good player, though, is he? Fine. Not the point I was making. What?

13:55Marcus Bean: Jim? I mean, he's a funny player, Brennan Johnson, isn't he? Because obviously he scored the winning goal in the Europa League final, actually scored a decent amount of goals for him. But he had to be there to do it. He scored a good amount of goals for Tottenham, but basically every club he's played for, you hear fans talking about his lack of technique and the sort of problems with his game. And he does seem like someone who isn't always as effective as they should be in those moments. He had a chance as well, didn't he, that he put wide, which wasn't an easy chance, to be fair to him, but it is an unfortunate evening for him.

14:25Why are you having a dig at Brennan this morning? It's a really poor penalty in a key moment. And Bellamy says they're going to practice penalties, and he's a£35 million player. He's playing the Premier League. I think he deserves criticism.

14:35Marcus Bean: Right. And he did spoon it over the bar. It wasn't like it was a poorly struck penalty that was saved, was it? It was just bad technique. Well, again, though, he's not the first player to have done such a thing. Let's never mention it then. I wasn't going to. I'll tell you what, the only person... I lost on panel. What more do you want? When someone lands on the moon in five years' time, it's not Neil Armstrong, so we're not going to talk about it. We won the first.

14:56Luke Moore: Well, who was the seventh person to land on the moon? Don't know. Right, there you go. You see? I could probably think about it. I reckon it might have been...

15:05Marcus Bean: Was it Michael Jackson? Yeah, I think it was Michael Jackson. Have you seen Moonwalker? No, it was his monkey. Right. Wasn't the monkey the first one? Is a monkey a person? That's a good point. We don't have time for that, Jim. I'll tell you what, we're ten minutes in, and this is a monkey a person. It's actually longer than I thought it would take.

15:21Luke Moore: Craig Bellamy said post-match, trying to rally his troops. It will be a sleepless night, but it makes me even more determined tomorrow. The sun will rise, and I've got to watch that sunrise. God, and then we're going to practice penalties. And then straight away, how do I go again? How do I improve? But let's get over tonight. There's a bright future. If I was playing, imagine looking forward to what's coming up. You have the Nations League, Group 8. Love that he mentioned that. You have a home Nations, Euros coming. It's not a bad time to be a Welsh footballer. And he's right. Yeah, he is. I think, again, okay, they've gone out in heartbreaking fashion here.

15:50Luke Moore: Wales in World Cup qualification. But it's a far cry from years gone by. And people might say, well, is that relevant? I just feel it is slightly, because a country the size of Wales, it's a very small population, to still continue that tradition, which I would say is a tradition, really, I mean, the late, great Gary Speed probably set in motion back when he was managing. You know, Chris Coleman, Robert Page, all those managers who got well to tournaments all within a whisker, because obviously again on Euro 2024 it was penalties against Poland, wasn't it? I think Bellamy's right and I think that it is a disappointing evening for them, there's no doubt about that, heartbreaking but still a lot to look forward to.

16:36I think Bellamy seems exceptionally well suited to the job as well. I think he'll stick around and I think he's trying to imbue that positivity into the squad ahead of like he says, some exciting stuff coming up. I don't think it's quite interesting how he has almost redeveloped himself based on what his reputation used to be. He's being quite a thoughtful but motivational and passionate coach and ticking all the boxes you want from an international coach like passionate Welshman, thinks about the game quite deeply, obviously really hardworking. I love that answer he gave ahead of the game about Mo Salah.

17:11That was really good. Yeah, good on him. I wish them all nothing but happiness. I want to see another one of those speeches that Michael Sheen did.

17:20Luke Moore: Yeah, yeah. That's what I want to see. Well, maybe he'll do that before next week's Friendly against Northern Ireland. Probably a waste of his talent. Imagine trying to get a team up for that. Before the game, Bromby manager Steve Cooper, another passionate Welshman, he was accused of sabotaging Bosnia's hopes of reaching this summer's World Cup. It probably worked with it. Well, the manager of Bosnia-Herzegovina claimed that Cooper dropped one of their midfielders for Bromby's two most recent games because obviously Wales are playing them in the World Cup playoffs. Trusting him. It's actually helping him.

17:53Luke Moore: Yeah, that's what I thought. Yeah, well, Barbara, as the manager said, Benjo, the player in question, has told me some things that are hard to believe. It has something to do with the coach's origin. When your coach wishes you but not your national team good luck, it leaves room for thought.

18:06Marcus Bean: That sounds like it's a sort of like dad-adjacent joke that's just been lost in translation there, doesn't it? Like, oh, good luck at the weekend. But only to a point. See you later. Barbaro's also said, the only important thing to sort of clarify these comments afterwards, he said, the only important thing for me is that I trust my players and the idea of all this was to create a puzzle for you so you can think about all of these things. I had the idea to protect the player. That's where all this talking was from. Is it a mind game if you tell everyone it's a mind game? I mean, it seems to work, incredibly.

18:36Luke Moore: That would be quite a good day. You've got a bro of Johnson's head. You know which way of time. If you, I think mind games are fine, but you have to state you're going to do a mind game. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right, this is a mind game. Okay, and then you go on to it. I think that's... Could be like a double bluff though. Well, there you are. Yeah, maybe I really think it. Indeed. Like for example, Jim, if I said to you ahead of like... What game are we doing later? Jacks or Billy Arn? My Billy Arn. I'm hosting today. But if I was playing and I said to you ahead of me playing against you, I think you're a bit of a cunt, right?

19:10It could be a mind game. I might genuinely think it

19:14Luke Moore: or it's just you being you again yeah but then that gets in his head as well yeah I think Jim would expect that I'm always in my head mate got nowhere else to go true but are you paying yourself rent though yeah no anyway is it rent free let us move on nah come on to Czechia to Czechia we're all in on Czechia do you think I'm a cunt you know I do where's that come from hey let's have a poll up on the WhatsApp on the ramble that's going to be good wouldn't it Czechia not to be confused with Czech Republic two Republic of Ireland two Czechia won four three on pens another Sikner yeah I mean Ireland's World Cup dreams the last time playing the World Cup was 2002 and they're two in a lap in the game yeah I think this is this is more this is the most frustrating

20:01Marcus Bean: of all three of them because of that exact reason Troy Parrott genuinely improved Spurs now yeah

20:05Luke Moore: I think he would you'd have to say yeah anyway don't look Troy's had a tough enough time as it is. He doesn't need to be linked to Spurs. I don't want those memories being dragged up again. No, certainly not. But yeah, 2-0 up, again, flew out the traps like Wales. Two goals to the good. And they saved the first penalty in the shootout as well. Very similar, yeah.

20:22Marcus Bean: They sat back at 2-0 up though, that's the problem.

20:25Luke Moore: Well, but to be fair to them though, I mean, you have to remember though, that the first Chequie goal was four minutes after they went 2-1 up. And they were good in that second half. Chequie didn't have much. So again, I think the way they sat up, and you'd expect that from from a Hal Grimmson side, that you get your territory right, mark the space, you know, all good organizational stuff. Take out for Lee. Quick root canal in the centre circle. Can I just say, there was eight minutes of this game between Troy Parrott's penalty and Patrick Schick's penalty, which were just simply an appalling advert for international football.

21:01A farcical own goal, an absolutely needless penalty, followed by one of the worst decisions from a defender you'll ever see. What is he doing? Where the ball's going out of play. It looked ridiculous. And he just pulls him back anyway. In the age of VAR. There's no excuse for it.

21:16Marcus Bean: It was just madness, wasn't it? Absolutely madness. Especially, you know, they beat Portugal and Hungary to get to this point and then they go 2-0 up. And from there, it is, again, an absolute capital S Sikna.

21:28Luke Moore: It really is, Jim. And, I mean, it's been, I don't want to labour the point, but it's so long since they've been at the World Cup. And they'd have played Denmark in the next game. Winnable? Yeah. I mean, talking about winnable games in international football is weird though because as Jim said, the public of Ireland have beaten some good teams already and you'd expect them to possibly, I mean, maybe you wouldn't because it's in Prague, but if they've beaten the teams of the profile of the teams they've beaten, you'd think, okay, well, Czech Republic's a decent draw. Could have got someone worse.

22:01Luke Moore: Yep. But, I mean, you just never know. And if they can't get past Czech Republic then how can they maybe they can't get past Denmark either I mean we're never going to find out of course but it's not as easy as that is it is what I'm saying it's not as easy as that

22:13Marcus Bean: well you've got to be in the hat haven't you you've got to give yourself the chance in the first place it's a shame they weren't able to do that yeah

22:21Luke Moore: I mean the fact that they made the playoff you know such amazing scenes of celebration when they beat Hungary and Budapest of course oh yeah of course but you know I mean there's a little something to hang their hats on I know that they won't feel like that this morning I mean, Hal Grimson himself said, you know, again, the future's bright and all that kind of chat because Ireland, it's been so barren really on the international stage for quite a long time now. Didn't stop the Irish fans travelling in numbers, of course. There was apparently a queue outside an Irishman in Prague at 9am on the morning of the game.

22:49Luke Moore: That's what we like to see. Roy King's raging. Yeah. That's all we're known for. Yeah. Can I... Wait for it to open. Can I spare a quick mention for Ladislav Krejci? You may, yes. Oh, a very important contribution. despite being a part of what we think may well be one of the worst Premier League teams in history although they have picked up recently I admit that he's actually had like a strangely good season he's carried himself with a lot of credit he's done well he'll get a move to I think if he wants to another Premier League team I think he's good enough he's obviously been made captain of Czechia and he's obviously scored a really important goal last night when I was looking him up because I thought oh he's a player I've had an eye on and I think he's pretty good I think he's a bit underrated and he's a centre-back, right?

23:36For Sparta Prague, he's scored 44 goals in 148 games. Ronald Puminesk. Including 13 league goals in 19 league games in 22-23. I'd love to know the story of that. Steve Bruce-esque. It is. He must have been on pens. We have to find out. We need some Czechia experts to tell us. But I mean, across five seasons in the top division in Czechia, he's scored 34 goals.

23:59Luke Moore: Not too shabby. Wow. Yeah, not too shabby at all. Not bad. And he got another important one last night. That's the kind of form that gets you a move to Girona, lads. There you go. Now, let's talk about Italy 2, Northern Ireland nil. This is a sickening show, this. It really is. It's a terrible day for the kingdom and our friends in Ireland. Yeah, I'm glad you're glad. It is, isn't it? It's a terrible day, Marcus. Let's call it what it is. It is. You said it's a glorious day in the kingdom. How can it be? We're getting through this depressing stuff. Well, hang on. That's not quite what I said at the start, and everybody's welcome to rewind it and check.

24:29Luke Moore: So don't you start that. Rewind, granddad. Rewind it. can I get a rewind now Italy yes they're through to the next round of the World Cup qualification process the final if you like Northern Ireland miss out they haven't qualified for the World Cup now since 1986 yeah which again just shows you how much of a signal this is I appreciate Northern Ireland going to Italy even though it's not a great Italian side still it's still Italy they've still got quality in there as Tonali showed when he scored that goal and also Moisey Ken when he scored a brilliant second well Tonali's was a textbook Tonali goal it was yeah but like it was it was a tall order this for Northern Ireland and I don't think too many can have many complaints even though I mean they look gutted of course they did after the final whistle but it's like 1986 you know despite the expanded tournament the expanded Euros has obviously helped a few sides of Northern Ireland included and get that tournament experience but the World Cup which is of course the holy grail of international football to get there even with the so far

25:29Marcus Bean: even with the expanded tournament though No, these playoffs are brutal. The routes are brutal.

25:35Luke Moore: And the expanded World Cup is not really, and I understand this is not a complaint, but it's aided more, I think, other continents. Sure. In Africa in particular, they have four or five places among about 50 teams. Crazy. So yeah, however we slice it, as you say, Jim, it's still very, very difficult to get through, particularly if you've not got the home advantage. And also they had Conor Bradley and Dan Ballard missing,

26:00Marcus Bean: which is just terrible timing. so Northern Ireland basically advanced through the playoffs through the Nations League right it was really tough for them to advance through the first stage of official World Cup qualification because they had Germany and Slovakia in their group and Slovakia who they actually beat at home but obviously lost away to you know it is I mean despite the fact that it's expanded it is still really hard for teams of that size as you said in the Euros it's much much easier and the Euros it's basically now way too big. Whereas I'm going to wait and see what it's like with the 48 teams in the World Cup.

26:36I suspect that'll be pretty dull as well in places. But, you know, it doesn't feel like this probably for people who are passionate fans of Northern Ireland, but, you know, getting to a playoff and losing to Italy, I mean, it's kind of about par. It's probably better than par, based on some things we've seen recently. You might say, yeah.

26:54Luke Moore: The Nations League is important, because if you wanted to stink out the World Cup qualification like Sweden did, and get two points two points from six games they were astonishingly bad yeah they now find themselves they didn't win a game they didn't win a single game they were shit yeah right they now find themselves a game away from qualifying because they got Poland of course they beat Ukraine 3-1 last night Victor Jokoresh hat trick yeah there we go there you are you see so it's a funny old game isn't it Michael O 'Neill when asked about his future as Northern Ireland manager said as things stand I will manage the game on Tuesday night against Wales of course and I will manage the remaining seven games for Blackburn Rovers because lest we forget he's got a bit of a job share.

27:34Luke Moore: But my contract is still with the IFA. I'm contracted to 2028 and after Blackburn Rovers I'll revert back to the status quo which is the national team manager. I love the way he worded that. You've got to have

27:45Marcus Bean: a side hustle these days.

27:46Luke Moore: I've always got something to fall back on. And sometimes that is Blackburn Rovers apparently. It's hugely respectful to the historic and proud football club that is Blackburn Rovers isn't it? Yeah. I mean it's not his fault. I mean obviously he offered the job but he's taken it fine. He's not there under duress though. As a sitting here as a Portsmouth fan, I really need him to do us a solid at Blackburn. If he could, that'd be absolutely sensational because we are looking really, really poor at the moment. Italy, of course, are trying to qualify for their first World Cup since 2014. Which is crazy.

28:16Luke Moore: It's absolute madness if you look at the Italian football team in the 21st century. Gattuso's so angry about it.

28:21Marcus Bean: He looks great though, doesn't he? He looks really, even more bear-like than he did as a player. And if there is a silver lining, is that he will be a big character at the World Cup if they get there which you would expect them to I think

28:33Luke Moore: we're seeing Gennaro Gattuso moving in you know we talk about old man strength yeah how strong is that man going to be yeah absolutely

28:41Marcus Bean: he's going to come for Joe Jordan let's be fair if he's going to go to the World Cup he's going to disgrace himself and so on and it's going to be fantastic yeah absolutely fantastic

28:50Luke Moore: he's going to be good but yeah I mean it's funny I was reading an article on the BBC about the Italian national side and how they've had their shortcomings for many, many years now. And it talks about from that 2006 World Cup win. And they've done this, and da-da-da-da-da-da. And there's just a little line. They did win the Euros in 2020. Yeah, that's wild. That's wild. That's wild. It's mad. Yeah. Our cost. Well. Expensive us. Indeed, they did. The memories are still painful. Did you see, though, that Italy, before the game, a newspaper pictured a group of young fans with the caption, the cover images were generated by AI.

29:26Luke Moore: we couldn't find any young people who were quite as happy to cheer on the national team. It's a really bad AI generation as well.

29:34Marcus Bean: Where basically every fan looks like the same person. Exactly the same, yeah. Absolutely hellish. Oh dear.

29:39Luke Moore: Right, coming up after this, England are up tonight.

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32:18Tell us something your mum doesn't know.

32:22Luke Moore: Oh, the sound of victory. Where was that? Was that in the last tournament? Was it Qatar? Quite a while ago now, wasn't it? I think it might have been Euro 2020. Yeah, okay. In 2021, of course. Yeah, look, it was a sombre first half. And if you wanted to see the sunshine after the rain, here it is. England against Uruguay tonight at Wembley. 7.45 kickoff. Don't you worry. I'll be there. And so will Thomas Tuchel. he said this camp is the last opportunity that's the order of billing isn't it on this show that is the order of ceremony right if you're looking at a festival line up right that's the order which it is right on the top of big capital letters only festival appearance this summer Marcus Speller and also special guest Thomas Tuchel

33:07Marcus Bean: to Marcus's mind England is so important even in a friendly there are people worrying that Thomas Tuchel won't turn up for some reason and there's also people worrying that he won't be there don't you worry I'll be there I would cheer on the boys

33:18Luke Moore: Who are you going with? Going with my old mate Nolsey Tell us the brand That's taking you there No, it's just a friend of mine Oh, okay You bought the ticket yourself? I did pay for a normal ticket, yes I've got my England dealer You've got your chain mail ready All of it The whole lot, Jim The whole lot You've got your reform flag You'll be up there hanging St George's flags on lampposts On the Wembley Way anyway, won't you? I'd hope that someone's already done that yeah you know one of our lot anyway anyway Thomas Tuchel said this camp is the last opportunity for players to compete for their ticket to the World Cup that's how expensive this one is indeed Jim tickets are very expensive I'd love him to dress up as Willy Wonka and do golden tickets and chocolate bars to the players so all the players have been in contention get given a Thomas Tuchel chocolate bar and they have to open it on the England YouTube channel that's how they find out And if it's got a golden ticket in it, they have to sing the Charlie Bucket song.

34:16Yeah. I got a golden ticket off my own. Yeah, and then they get straight on the bus.

34:22Luke Moore: If not, they get sucked out of a tube like Augustus Gloop or whoever it was. Stuck in the chocolate river. They're drowned in a chocolate river. It's not a plane, it's a great glass elevator. It is. Very good. Augustus Gloop does get stuck in the tube. Oh, he gets stuck in the tube. Yeah, yeah. Like I might do on the way to the game. Okay. Let's hope not, though. Will you have a little Chucky Bee in the pocket? keep you going? Oh, that's a good idea. Like the big man himself? Pleasure, you can't measure. Yeah, well, you know what it's like in corner shops in London. They are just, it's like the Garden of Eden and something.

34:51Luke Moore: It is for you, yeah. A bit of marzipan. Give us a marzipan one. Ritter Sport. There we go. Very good.

34:57Marcus Bean: You know what I mean? I don't understand how it's related to sport, but I don't mind. Well, it obviously... It's the most European... To be fair, Ritter Sport is a Euro chocolate bar. It's the most European chocolate bar. Go on, you want a Hershey's, mate? No, a bollock.

35:08Luke Moore: They're horrible, but it's American, isn't it? Why not Reece's Pieces?

35:10Marcus Bean: He doesn't like American things. It's Reece's Pieces. They are.

35:14Luke Moore: Yeah, Reece Butternut. Reece James. Reece James' Pieces. Right, yeah. One of them, Jim. There you go. And I'll have a can of Fanta as well. Let's just do the game now.

35:23Marcus Bean: We sound like we're in a nursing home at this point. But in the future... We've forgotten where we actually are. Yeah. Reece's Pieces, that's the matter. Fanta. Have you ever chopped the bar on the tube?

35:37Luke Moore: I might not get to the ground I might get stuck underground Was it Augusta's clue?

35:44Marcus Bean: What are you talking about sir? Just take your medicine What was Pete said to me the other day Come on grandad Let's get you back to bed

35:52Luke Moore: Right anyway England yeah where are we? Not all of She's on toast Come on let's go Not all of England's 35 man squad Will be with England for this game of course As is the hectic nature of this particular He'll do well, won't he? 11 players will join the squad for the game against Japan next week. Against who, sorry? Japan. Those players who will join up for that game. So tonight, these players won't be involved. Perhaps an easier way of saying it. So we will not see Dean Henderson, Dan Byrne, Mark Gay, Ezri Concert, Nico O 'Reilly, Elliot Anderson, Declan Rice, Morgan Rodgers, Anthony Gordon, Harry Kane, and Bakao Saka.

36:27Luke Moore: Why did I go to this game and not the Japan game? I don't want to watch it if Dean Henderson's not involved. No, I didn't think you would. That's a good team there. That's a good team right there. It's an excellent team. That'd win the World Cup, that team. I think if we just sent those 11 men. Do you know what? I mean, you're right. That's a good starting 11. Not too shabby. I'm right. That would win the World Cup if I just sent 11 men. You're right. That's how confident the fever is now. I think I was agreeing with Jim's point and not yours, but fine. Again, you can rewind and have a listen.

36:58Luke Moore: But there will be plenty of Englishmen on display at Wembley tonight, on the pitch, particularly and Ben White and Harvey Barnes could be involved Harvey McBarnes Harvey what's going on not anymore to be fair to Harvey he's chucked the kilt away has he chucked it in the lock I think he could train back down to London Harvey put all his chips on England didn't he because he when Stevie Clark was making kissy faces at him Harvey Barnes knows that if he goes do you know what Scotland yeah alright he will be a starting player for them surely he would start And he's 28 now as well. Yeah, exactly. He would be a starting player.

37:35Luke Moore: And obviously, they've qualified for the World Cup. I understand had he joined up with Scotland after they qualified, I think that might have been a little bit cheeky. But still, I would imagine they would have probably said, OK, I don't know what the conversations were. But he said no. He wanted to have a go at England. And the season he's had, I don't think it's unreasonable to think that he, you know, adds something to the squad. He's essentially finding it really, really hard because of the quality of players we've got in that position. Well, his teammate, Anthony Gordon. Yeah, he's certainly one of them.

38:08But I do think there's room. This is perhaps a little bit cheeky, but there is room for someone who's actually in the form. Because if you look at some of the wide forwards England have got, Bakayasaka will be one of them. He's not actually in great form.

38:20Luke Moore: But it's that left side where he would... I know, but broadly speaking, they do rotate around a lot, play different shapes, that kind of thing. My point just being, if you were going to take it in the round as wide forwards, Right? It's unthinkable a year ago to say, well, Bakayosaka's not been in great form. But he hasn't been, has he? So there's a little glint of light opening up here or there is what I'm saying. And also,

38:42Marcus Bean: Barnes is a player who's got a lot of experience of coming off the bench and making an impact. And he's comfortable doing that. And he's seemingly happy doing that. That will likely be his role at the tournament. Yeah, it's...

38:55Luke Moore: I mean, he seems like the prime candidate. But on that left-hand side where he would be vying for, Anthony Gordon, I think a lot of people probably have him down as a starter. Fair enough. Okay. Marcus Rashford doesn't start games for Barcelona. I appreciate that he is playing for Barcelona, but he was starting games when, was it Rafinha would have been injured? Yeah. And since then, he's very much a squad player. Now, Tuchel clearly likes Rashford. Rashford's got a lot of experience at international level, but isn't starting so many games. So could there be a little bit rusty or whatnot? Or you could say, well, is he going to be fresh?

39:30Luke Moore: and then some might say you know would Eberetje play on that left side or is he more central you know all it takes is an injury Rashford or Gordon get injured you know Barnes is probably in Harvey Barnes in terms of goals to game ratio which I appreciate is fairly unscientific but just to put a counterpoint out there he's been more effective on the right than he has on the left he's very versatile he can play both sides yeah and that's a good point to make and I think with Barnes again look he was called up late I mean, it was, you know, it was an injury in the squad and then he got a late call up to this 35-man side.

40:04Luke Moore: But look, he's still in there. So fair play to Barnes for holding on. He's backed himself at 28. He's only had played, what, one friendly five, six years ago? Yeah, he has very little interest. And that's it. And he's still backed himself. He could have said, as you rightly point out, I'm going to the World Cup with Scotland. And it's basically a shoo-in. But he's chosen not to do that. He feels English. Yeah. Marcus, he's got England in his heart. Of course he does. Yeah. Does Ben White? We're not sure. He's got Dubai in his heart. Well, he can't go there. Difficult to say. He basically needs somewhere hot to go.

40:38I think he's, I mean, the things in Ben White's heart, to me, feel like Dubai definitely, ITV1 definitely in his heart. Right.

40:45Marcus Bean: Uno. Loves Uno. Yeah. But he's got a big ITV energy, Ben White. Yeah, massively. Yeah, yeah. He's Kia Sportage. He's chicken tonight. He's ITV1. Have you seen that video of him chasing Gemma Collins? when he's much younger, I think he's probably still at Brighton, possibly even at Leeds, and he's running somewhere around and he's running along, like just big grin on his face, and he just catches up to her and they're both on camera and he's going GC, GC, and she's like, all right. She clearly doesn't know who he is. It's a proper smile in the way I've never seen from him before because he's a very sort of deadpan man.

41:19Marcus Bean: He's an absolute postcode lottery of a player, isn't he? Massively, massively. I mean, she's the queen of ITV2. That's bang right. He's Keith Lemon of football. Yeah, kind of. And I love Ben White. And, you know, I obviously have seen Keith Lemon, so you know how I feel about him. And it pains me to admit that you're right on that, but you are. He's the sort of geezer who pop up in a Keith Lemon show. Yeah. He loves it. He also was absolutely fuming with apparently a, quote, barbed comment from Steve Holland the last time he was in England camp.

41:51Luke Moore: Yeah, so that's the story, isn't it? I'm sure a lot of people have read this or heard this. and it's been circulated for a little while but yeah at the 2022 World Cup when Ben White was there apparently Steve Holland questioned Ben White's I don't know why do I say integrity it's difficult that you weren't he questioned his love and passion for football yeah he wasn't in the I wasn't in the room you know the tone of voice blah blah blah blah but it it caught sources close to me say that Steve Holland said it was just like a throwaway remark and as if you know Ben White wasn't paying too much attention and it was kind of like well look if you're a bit more attention, maybe, you know.

42:28Luke Moore: Yeah, but it was in comparison to another player.

42:30Marcus Bean: I think it might have been Kyle Walker. He apparently questioned, he asked Kyle Walker something about a particular situation that would happen at Man City or whatever, and he had an answer. He asked Ben White something similar and he said he didn't know, and then he made that comment. And apparently also, this doesn't seem to be reported with this story, which comes up quite often. Apparently, Ben White was going through something in his personal life at the time that was very, very serious and very difficult. And that often is left out of the reporting here. So it was a very emotional time for him and he essentially felt undermined in front of a group of peers who obviously didn't know that well.

43:03Marcus Bean: It's a difficult thing to come into a camp like that. But did he go home from the World Cup? He did, yeah. So it must have been pretty full on. I have no idea what you're referring to there, Jim, and I give you the benefit of the doubt, of course, and clearly him. But it feels like it must be pretty serious for him to have gone all the way home from a World Cup camp.

43:19Luke Moore: Yeah, because he was in the Euro 2020 squad. That's right. but it's a new broom now isn't it

43:24Marcus Bean: well it is yeah exactly and that's what Tuchel said he's also said he's confident Ben White won't be booed at Wembley I hope he's right there

43:30Luke Moore: well I mean quite clearly Ben White wants to play for England but you're king of the boo boys I'm not one of the boo boys have you ever booed no ever booed at a football match ever I don't I must look at the opposition maybe or a bad refereeing call or something boo typical London lefty that story is so good carry on But no, I think Ben White clearly wants to play for England. But as you say, whatever happened, we weren't there with him and Steve Holland. He felt, no, that's it. And the relationship was broken and he wasn't asked back into the side. But in the here and now, he's back starting games for Arsenal.

44:11Luke Moore: What does he bring on the pitch? Because let's be honest, right? Whatever's gone before, can he play in this England side? is he going to add something to the right back position because that position with Rhys James being constantly injured it's up for grabs. And you've got Tino Liveramento in there which I think a lot of people quite like. He's been injured a lot as well by the way. But another player who's injured Trent Alexander-Arnold is clearly not in Thomas Tuchel's plans. Whatever you may think of that If this is the last chance for your ticket then he's not going. Trent's not going to the World Cup barring a load of injuries and even then he'd probably play Konza or whoever else at right back.

44:46Luke Moore: But Ben White's in Jim. What do you think then of his credentials and what he could bring to that position for England?

44:51Marcus Bean: So this is actually an unusual time, I think, for Ben White to get this call up. He hasn't played much. And every time he's put a little run of games together, he's got another injury. Traditionally, he takes a bit of time to get back up to full speed after an injury. I think he had a bad injury that he played through a few seasons ago. And I think it might have affected just his body in a way that he's still feeling the repercussions of. so I mean in the Carabao Cup final he looked absolutely gassed after about an hour and that's been a sort of facet of his game fairly recently because as I say he's still getting back up to speed and getting into the rhythm of playing regularly that said once he does get into that rhythm he is an absolute machine and he's really really sort of really good as an overlapping option as a fullback no sack of will absolutely and it's rare I think that you see someone who started as a centre back take to that side of a full-back's game so well, but he's very, very good at that.

45:48Marcus Bean: So you will be getting a very traditional right-back, really, in that sense of kind of bombing up and down the wing like that. It's not always the best in sort of one-on-one situations, but he's also not absolutely terrible. It's certainly kind of one of the kind of weakest spots in his game. So yeah, I mean, he's a dependable right-back. He's very, very solid, obviously very sort of calm-headed, very cool and collected. we see that just from his personality really so yeah that's what you'd be getting like I say I think he wouldn't get in over Rhys James but it's very unlikely James is going to be there

46:21Luke Moore: Rhys James is such a Rolls Royce of a player we all hope that he's going to be fit but you think it's unlikely Rhys James is going to be there do you? he's played a lot of games this season yeah true this injury he's got is only apparently a minor one two weeks out I think that if you're going to gamble on a player we saw Southgate gamble on players in Euro 2024 there was one player Tuchel was going to gamble on fitness-wise it would be Rhys James

46:42Marcus Bean: yeah and also I mean James can do a very very good job in midfield because we've seen him do it for Chelsea in the way that it hasn't for Trent the drop-off from a fully fit Rhys James is absolutely seismic because another one of the

46:53Luke Moore: full-backs in there who could play that right side because he is right foot is Jed Spence but again Conza's played then well the Conza would be another one yeah so the Conza you would think would be first and foremost he's a centre-half but can do a job at right back but again you're in that you're in the reality is Rhys James is a miles better right than any other players And I think next down the line, I would think would probably be Tino Liveramento. Yeah, and I think Liveramento's also really good, but he's also missed a decent amount of football for injury. But here's a little quiz for you there.

47:22How many games do you think Rhys James has played for club and country since the start of this season if you include the Club World Cup? This is a player who everyone thinks is injured all the time.

47:33Marcus Bean: I would reckon it'd be about 25, maybe? I think probably about 35. 47, the answer is. 47 games, wow. There you go. there you go 47 appearances yeah so and in that is quite a lot of stuff so he has played he has a lot of players find it hard understandably so to shake off this tag of being injury prone I know that Rhys James two seasons ago missed like six months yeah I thought he'd had a more serious injury than he does I thought he was a doubt clearly he's not I don't know how serious it is but I thought it was much more minor than people are saying but who knows ultimately that's why Ben White's been called up because we need to get some cover there and if it turns out that Rhys James can't make it then he can't make it.

48:11I mean, he's got to get on with it, haven't he?

48:12Luke Moore: He's got to get on with it. So it will be fascinating to see who he starts for the game tonight. Bielsa's going to be there. Yeah. Yeah, well, indeed. We're going to enjoy Bielsa and the... Do you think one of the reasons why Tuchel has left a lot of players who would be vying for first team positions and some of them nailed on obviously Kane and Declan Rice he's thinking friendly against Uribe they could just turn up

48:33Marcus Bean: and kick the shit out of us. Yeah, they're in a bit of a kind of sorry state at the moment as well. So apparently Bielsa made Darwin Nunes cry at half time of a game. They went on to win 2-0. How is Bielsa making Darwin Nunes cry? Darwin went,

48:47Luke Moore: can I have a little sit on your bucket? And he went, no. I find that very surprising to hear. Do we know why? Do we know what was said?

48:54Marcus Bean: I'm not really sure. Yeah, okay. They qualified relatively straightforwardly for the World Cup, didn't they? Yeah. We expect them to kick the shit out of us at Wembley, are we? We need a strong referee is what we need.

49:04Luke Moore: We need a very strong referee and we need some strong players. Is that why Ben White's been called up as a sort of punishment? Yeah, quite possibly. He can play, but against Uruguay. Again, he was a late call-up. It was only any injuries that put him in there. So hopefully England won't suffer any injuries against Uruguay tonight. Well, you'll be there, won't you, to sort of make sure that everything's all done. Well, if they get an injury, I'll boo them off the pitch then, if that works. Take your magic sponge. I should say so. I should say so. Now, speaking of England fans, have you seen the England superfan Andy Milne?

49:34Luke Moore: You know the guy who looks a bit like Steve McLaren? Yeah. I think he first came to our attention in the 2022 Qatar World Cup. If you... He did. Yeah, right. If you are listening to or watching this and you don't quite know how to picture England superfan Andy Milne, I can give you Pete Donaldson's description of him if you'd like. Go on. Pete Donaldson this morning on WhatsApp described him as a cheeky face for us Gen Xers. I don't think he connects with the young, but he's a proper meat and potatoes 90s... He's a Promet Me and Potatoes 1980s uncle face. Maybe did a turn on Opportunity Knox back in the day, owned a jag but lost it on the horses.

50:16That's what he looks like. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

50:17Marcus Bean: And to be fair, you said in reply to that, totally agree with this, type of lad back in the 80s in Gosport, who was either high on the hog and taking the kids to Disney World, or absolutely on the bones of his arse. Yeah. That's right. Those two descriptions are absolutely right. Rollercoaster of an 80s bloke. Yeah. That's what he looks like though. Yeah. Whereas in practice, it seems like he's got a spare house, hasn't he? He's a kind of geezer. When I grew up, there was a place called Hedka, which is Hardway and Elson District Community Association, where you'd go there for events. They did like a big New Year's Eve party or whatever.

50:46And he's 100 % when I was about 12, the type of geezer who you knew through your dad, who had a gold bracelet, and he'd be dishing out tenors to the kids. And he'd buy you a Coke and tell you to make them last. That kind of guy.

51:00Luke Moore: Well, you know he lives in Thailand, Andy Bill. Right. So a bit more modern than what you're talking about, but still I think it's in the same genre. He's going to put his second home in Cheshire on the market. To go to the World Cup? To go to the World Cup. He's got tickets for every game up to the final. As we know, that will set you back over£4 ,000. He must have good England points for that as well. Oh, he's got loads of England points. But that'll set you back over£4 ,000. In Qatar, to remind you all, that would have been just over£1 ,000. Okay? They have, again, just to remind you,

51:29Marcus Bean: they have hiked the prices, the bastards. I mean, England superfan Andy Milne is selling his house. Second house. Selling a house. Which does put it in perspective. Although he does live in Thailand, so it's the home he comes back to.

51:42Luke Moore: So I think that puts it in a little bit more perspective. But look, he said, The last tournament in Qatar was a present to myself. I have been saving for years. We had a second over 27 years, so it felt like the right time to cash in. The first World Cup he attended was in 1982. Incredible. But he said, I always try to do things cheaply if I can. I will couch surf where possible. I am lucky to have friends in Mexico, Dallas and Vancouver.

52:02Marcus Bean: So he's selling his house and he's still having to couch surf. That's what this World Cup is.

52:06Luke Moore: Selling his house! But Alexey Llanas is really proud of the ticket prices. Yeah, sure. What an absolute bellend. He's a proper bellend. He's a proper bellend. He's a proper son, I am disappointed. Because back in the day he was like a character. In the 90s and the World Cup 94. Yeah, but we didn't know that much about... Played the guitar and stuff, didn't he? Yeah, but he had a goatee beard. Like the Varner. He looked funny. Yeah, fine. Nobbed. Yeah, I spoke to my friend who's quite big in the England Supporters Association, not you. Well, I'm not in the England Supporters Association. Why are you not part of that official makeup?

52:39They'd love you as an ambassador there. They would. They would.

52:44Marcus Bean: He'll decide. Your eyes glazed over there.

52:46Luke Moore: I was agreeing with you.

52:47Marcus Bean: Yeah.

52:47Luke Moore: I've got young kids. Yeah, you can't. I'm off for seven weeks and I'm spending everything we own. Yeah. Yeah, fair point. Just sell your second house. True. I've got to get it first. But I've sent a message to my friend who's involved in that stuff, asked him what he thinks of England superfan Andy Milne. So if I get an update, I'll tell you. Well, yeah, one of my mates who goes to watch England, they actually met him, and he sent a little video note to our back in the day when I was still playing for the football note, and he seemed like a good lad. Oh, did he? Yeah. He loves the salam. He's got a book out as well.

53:17Who's that for?

53:18Luke Moore: The England boys. Is he? Yeah. It's just people he's met at games. But England boys like England footballers. Yeah. They're like England games. They don't like this weirdo fan. This guy's one of us. On the front cover of the book, he's wearing a 1998 England top and he's holding the actual, well, not the actual, but he's holding a World Cup replica. A replica. Well, he took a replica with him to Qatar, didn't he? Yeah, he loved a bit of that. Who's the publisher here? Yeah. You have a look, Jim. In this book, there will be celebrity and surreal encounters from chance meetings with drug smugglers and football legends to pretending to be a Romanian journalist to sneak into a stadium.

53:56Luke Moore: The book is packed with offbeat unforgettable moments. You've done its job for it there, mate. Alright, Andy, you've done well out of us. I think it's time for a break.

54:14Marcus Bean: Hi, this is Matt from P1 with Matt and Tommy and this episode is sponsored by eBay. The cars you'll find on eBay are just different. They come with a story that you can't wait to share. Like this 1973 Dodge Charger on eBay that has been tucked away in an Arizona barn for over 40 years, only 55 ,000 miles and somehow in great running order. It even has a rare sunroof. Suddenly a car that was hidden for decades is being delivered in just a few clicks with eBay's secure purchase. All the paperwork handled.

54:44Luke Moore: There are thousands of cars on eBay, from unique finds like the Pontiac Grand Prix SJ to daily drivers, and now with a new way to buy them. eBay. Things people love.

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56:08Luke Moore: Tomorrow at 5pm, it's Scotland versus Japan. Against who, sorry? Japan. Who? Doing their British tour. Do it like Alex Ferguson would do it. Japan. Yeah. But kind of more up it, up it, more energy.

56:20Marcus Bean: Japan! no but Ferguson was famously very dismissive of Benger coming from I know particularly in that second syllable

56:28Luke Moore: I am doing it I've done it about five times you're not being dismissive enough okay alright in the British tour or tour of Britain Scotland are going to face Japan away to Scotland and of course they're playing England on Tuesday night I think it is Scotland though returning to to the field for the first time since that famous 4-2 victory over Denmark the scenes in that game oh that game was amazing it was so good Scenes of a different nature. Yeah. How could you not like international football when you witness that? It was incredible, that. Yeah. Kenny McLean was just thinking,

57:02Marcus Bean: poor old Kieran Tierney. Could you be talking about him now? Yeah, yeah. But Kenny McLean does that. He's thinking,

57:07Luke Moore: I could run it into the corner of nobody's pressure where I could slip someone in. Do you know what? Yaldi. It's one of those nights. Oi, the goals got on empty. Oh, dear me. We all forget about Scott McTominay's incredible bicycle kick in that game as well. Yeah, well, it's on a mural now, isn't it? Well, yes, it is. Now, Diego Maradona's son, one of his many children, has called Scott McTominay Jesus. Mm. Right? Now, after McTominay scored to secure a 1-0 victory for Napoli over Cagliari, Diego Armando Maradona Jr. said, after my father, McTominay is the most decisive player in the history of Napoli.

57:47Luke Moore: We had God at Napoli in the form of Diego. But for me, McTominay is Jesus. He is a completely fundamental player. Which is an intriguing quote. Diego Maradona officially recognised eight children in his lifetime. According to the Google search I've just done, he has been the subject to several long-running paternity disputes. So we don't know how many, but one of them who has come out the woodwork, is he presumably useless at football? his son, is he? Hasn't that a career? Who knows? Get a different career, I think. Yeah, I think it's probably difficult when you're called that. Yeah, exactly. Middle name as well, fuck's sake.

58:20Yeah, the whole thing. Has he gone over the top there with Scott?

58:24Luke Moore: Well, he went over the top with his father, saying that we had God at Napoli, the form of Diego. Yeah. I mean, I've... But that would make him Jesus, you know, God's son. True. That's true. That's what Neapolitans genuinely think, though, isn't it? Well, yeah, there was a church, wasn't there? I mean... No, that's in Argentina. Right, okay, fine. The Church of Diego Maradona.

58:40Marcus Bean: I know you've both read Diego Maradona's autobiography. And if you're listening and you haven't read it, I absolutely urge you to do that because about every 10 pages he just casually mentions that he's never cheated on his wife. Just in all kinds of contexts. Eight paternity disputes that we know of.

58:56Luke Moore: Just the eight. That's the thing. The disputes that we know of. We haven't even gotten to the children. And I think, it's a part of me that thinks, you're Diego Maradona. I'm surprised it's not more than that. he's a god in Argentina I mean as you've just mentioned almost quite literally to some people

59:13Marcus Bean: certainly deified I think Scott McTominay one thing we can all agree on here

59:17Luke Moore: go on is when Scott McTominay left under something of a cloud at Man United we didn't expect this we didn't expect this no we were not prepared for this we thought he might do quite well yeah yeah all of a sudden he's the new Maradona right yeah it's amazing nothing about him as a player yeah reminds me of Maradona no Well, to be fair, we said he's the most decisive player in history. Right, okay, fine. So that's what he's saying. Bit of a translation thing there, maybe. But I mean, you know, we know he's had a great time there, and long may it continue. It's great that he's enjoying these plaudits, because he's having a lovely time.

59:49But at international level, he's having a lovely time as well. Out on the town, dressed immaculately.

59:53Marcus Bean: He looks so good. Have you seen that picture of him just looking a million bucks? No, it's not that one. It's another one. He's leaning on a wall, and Kevin De Bruyne, of all people, is looking at him with puppy dog eyes. just absolutely thrilled by the aura of Scott McTominay. We've often said, if you had a football career, you were fortunate enough to be a player, you went overseas, you'd have to really embrace it, throw yourself into it. What tends to happen, not so much now, but back in the day with British players going overseas, they just wouldn't get into the mindset. But well, it's all different here and I don't quite like it.

1:00:24If you immerse yourself in it, you could be Scott McTominay.

1:00:27Marcus Bean: Do you remember the first thing was tomatoes? It was like, these tomatoes are amazing. Yeah, they taste really good. Yeah, yeah. Maybe that's the secret. They do take the tomatoes as very seriously in that.

1:00:35Luke Moore: They're just better out there though. Yeah, well obviously. Well indeed. But Scott McTominay, you know, even at international level, I mean it's all coming up. He's got a World Cup to look forward to and I'll tell you something right now, Carlo Ancelotti in Brazil, they are making plans on how to deal with this guy. They will be. But Steve Clarke though, who's done, you have to say, despite his critics, he's done pretty well as Scotland manager. He's got them to the World Cup. He's out of contract after the World Cup, incidentally. Yeah, that's funny. The Scottish FA have yet to offer him a new contract.

1:01:03Luke Moore: I think they'll just be basically waiting to see how it goes. I mean, let's be honest, in that game against Denmark, all joking aside, it could have gone the other way. And Clarke has had his critics. You know, it's slightly similar in part to what Southgate faced at England. You know, obviously improved the mood, you know, got them at tournaments, but people thinking that football has not been the most exciting and so on and so forth. But I think that is true. But I think surely the debate is settled now because the end has justified the means in a spectacular way. The third tournament he's qualified for, which is pretty great.

1:01:35Luke Moore: But the way they went out of Euro 2024, that pissed off a reasonable amount of fans. Sure, but the slate's been wiped clean and they've just qualified for the World Cup in a spectacular way and they're going to be playing Brazil, yes? Indeed. So, I think that is why they're going to see how they get on at the tournament. I think that's fair enough. I think the fans from all of you, even if it's begrudgingly, you've got to be like, okay, fair enough. I think they are, but that's why I don't think he's been offered the new contract. Fine. All right then, everybody. We have to wait a bit for England to play this evening and Scotland tomorrow.

1:02:04Luke Moore: But later today, before that huge game at Wembley between England and Uruguay, there's a huge game in my biddy aunt which will be available to listen to this afternoon. Make sure to subscribe to the Football Rumble in your podcast app so that you do not miss it. It is me versus Jim. I'm hosting. I've been first time in the hosting chair for a while, a bit nervous about it, but it's a great game. It'll be a great episode and you guys better bring your A games. To be honest, these things are starting to turn into a bit of a one-horse race so we need to get some form back. We do. So I'll be encouraging of you both in the host chair as I will be to see a good quality level of performance today.

1:02:40Biddy biddy. So we're going to have a little break before we record it and put it out later. You guys need to go and get your heads on, okay? You need fire in the belly. You need your head in the freezer. Right.

1:02:49Luke Moore: Well, until that huge grudge match between Jim and I, thanks for listening to the Football Ramble, part of the Agar's Creator Network. As I say, my bitty aunt will be in your ears later this afternoon, so do not miss that. Thank you, Luke Moore. Thank you very much. Thank you, Jim Campbell. Thank you. Thank you, Scott McTominay.

1:03:13Marcus Bean: The Football Ramble is a Stack Production and part of the Acast Creator Network.

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