Two-footed giraffes, The Greatest Showman and Norwegian brown cheese | 2026 FIFA World Cup

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3:06Pete Donaldson: Ooh la la everybody, welcome to the Football Ramble! Morocco march on in front, soar off Paraguay. It's Sunday 5th of July, I'm Marcus Speller. I'm Pete Donaldson. And I'm Vinicius de Hattaraja. Hey!

3:30Pete Donaldson: Hello everybody, it's Sunday and it's a beautiful day in the Kingdom and it's lovely to have Vish on the pod. Vish is back on the pod. Yeah. Vish is back on the pod. What have you learned from the other parts of the UK that isn't London?

3:46Marcus Speller: I've learned that cricket with the retirement of Ben Stokes is now... Stokesless. Dead. as an interesting concept as a thing that people should enjoy and so I'm back on the bandwagon

4:00Pete Donaldson: well we've got an Esri concept for you later

4:06Marcus Speller: I'm getting off the bandwagon

4:09Pete Donaldson: well England will be playing Mexico tonight slash very early tomorrow morning and we'll be here on the mics tomorrow morning for a live ramble whose idea was that? It was mine, Peter. That's whose. It was yours. They kept moving. They tried to sort of see you off by moving the start time of the match. But no. No FIFA. Yeah. It's going to be loosey-goosey. We're going live. We're going live, baby. Myself, Luke, and that guy Vish will be live at 10.30 British summertime on the Football Ramble YouTube channel. So set your alarms to make sure you don't miss it. You can find the link to that channel in the show notes.

4:44Pete Donaldson: It's pretty easy to find. You should know that by now. We will also be previewing the match later on today. So keep your eye out for that episode wherever you get your pods. So the preview later today, the review tomorrow, live at 10.30. Now then, Paraguay 0, France 1. No yellow cards for Paraguay. Despite how much they tried to get one. Everybody talks about how much they lose shithousery until someone shits in your house. Yes, indeed. That is absolutely true. There's shit in my carpet. how do I get this out this is a nightmare this is a nightmare but I enjoyed every last minute of this did you?

5:25I did I turned into full David Cartlidge mode where is he this morning he'd be absolutely licking his lips he's in Asuncion but he touched some cartilage last night that kind of performance I think he's flown

5:36Pete Donaldson: to Asuncion to clap them home when they're on yeah that's where he is I mean I would actually yeah I wonder if David thought even that for him was a bit too far perhaps not but yeah I mean And that was really the story of this game, wasn't it? The Paraguayan antics, shall we say. And how none of them got even a yellow card. I mean, I'm sorry, everybody, but the refereeing at this tournament. It's absurd.

6:05Marcus Speller: But this was the worst of it. It's utterly absurd. I don't know what to say. If there is an agreement at the start, it's not even that. I don't mind if it's really to the letter or it's like it was tonight, which was, you know, like the Hunger Games, I just think that there needs to be some sort of like, right, this is going to be one of those matches. Just let the people know beforehand, because the French soon realized that they were not going to get much out of this referee at all, really. Yeah.

6:33Pete Donaldson: The other side... Well, France got three bookings.

6:36Marcus Speller: Ludacris. The other side to it was, I don't mind the, you know, some of the laissez-faire refereeing, because it has been consistent for both teams, But it felt like this referee for this game... It was com si com sa, wasn't it? It was a bit com si com sa. But there was an element of like, oh, you're better than them. They're only trying to leave a way. They're quite ill will out in the end. The other thing about it was...

7:00Pete Donaldson: I don't mind that in the FA Cup third round. You know, where it's, you know... Headness for Brighton. Exactly, something like that.

7:06Marcus Speller: In that situation, Grimsby Town played the better football full-star. The referee got confused. But you know, so one of the things that referees were told coming into this World Cup was basically to not fall for the play acting. Your man last night was picking players up. Don't do that.

7:25Pete Donaldson: I mean, that is quite unbelievable, really.

7:29Marcus Speller: No, let me have a look at it. No, that's fine.

7:31Pete Donaldson: We know sometimes you can tell what the brief is for referees. I mean, often we're told, but you can see it on the pitch with the way the games are officiated. I go back all the way to, I remember the 1998 World Cup, where in the first round of games, everyone commended the referees and said they were doing a really good job because they were letting the game fly, obviously not to the proportions that we're seeing this time around, because they're letting the game fight. But they were letting the game fly. It was really, really good. And when we got into the knockouts, I think it was Seth Blatter who was in charge at the time, said, no, no, no, you need to be a bit hard.

8:00Pete Donaldson: You know, you're letting too much go. And then suddenly the yellow cards were coming out and things, and everyone went, hang on, what's happened? and it did transpire that Blatter said, no, I wasn't actually happy with that. And everyone's a bit pissed. Certainly in this country, I don't know what it's like around the world. And people are a bit annoyed. So obviously there are instructions. As we've said before, the great Pierluigi Colina, who's the gold standard of refereeing, we hold him in very high regard. He said, let the game flow and so on and so forth. He was doing this when he did it as well.

8:29Like that guy who's on pills and he's gone, salad fingers. No, not salad fingers. I don't remember that. He's a very famous caner. He's a man who goes to, like, sort of happy hardcore nights, and he looks like Kalina, and he goes, like that, because he's having such a good time.

8:43Marcus Speller: He's one of those inflatable men in forecourt. And you expect us to know who this guy is? Yes. Right, okay. If you've been in the internet in the last 10 years, he's very, very visible. Beefy, beefy. I've been quite prevalent on... Don't say beefy. Don't say internet and beefy. It's that kind of music, beefy. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Not that beefy.

9:01Pete Donaldson: Yeah. No, I know who you mean. Is it Sean Jackson? Sean Jackson. Yeah. No, I think it's Sean Jackson. Is that Barry from EastEnders? The producer Rory just put a note in there. It's Sean Jackson. Not helpful. Not helpful. We don't even know his name. I do know him. There's a picture. The Gurning Rave guy. Oh, I thought that was Pierluigi Kalina. Exactly. He's having a good time.

9:22Marcus Speller: I think he might have been refereeing yesterday.

9:24Pete Donaldson: I think that fella. Yes, exactly. He got hold of the referees. He was like, right, this is what we're going to do. We're going to have a rave. And Kalina turned up. They'd all gone. He was like, oh, no. It's happened again. But how would you prefer this match to have been refereed? Because the Canada-Morocco one had Michael Oliver, and he was being a little bit bitty and a little bit Premier League-y and a little bit rubbish, in my opinion. I didn't mind this match as something to watch, as a spectacle.

9:53Marcus Speller: I do know what you mean, because I found it really funny for the first half. I've got no word of a lie. I was like, fine. Paraguay know they can't go toe-to-toe with France. they could only stifle them. Remove their toes. And CISO and Almiron were like, at times, running away from Saliba and whoever else, like they were being chased through a forest by ghouls. The shift they put in. But the actual penalty, obviously, it gets given in the end, but Almiron nearly has to beat Saliba. I was like, go on, lads. Oh, do you know, he must have been gutted about that

10:28Pete Donaldson: because that was a waste of a sprint. And it was an almighty sprint as well. I'll tell you what though, impressive. Yeah, it was. Absolute engine.

10:36Marcus Speller: And Cicero as well. I didn't quite realise he was so fast. Like in terms of like top end acceleration. But they did stifle them. And I thought Galaza had a decent first half. In a way that you'd commend him for, you know, keeping Dembele quiet. And the fact that they decided to essentially mob Elise to keep him quiet. It's probably the highest game of the World Cup so far. And then they came out in the second half, perhaps actually governed by how much rope they were getting from the referee in the first half. But they completely abandoned any principle of like, winning the ball back and moving it forward as quickly as possible.

11:16Marcus Speller: They were just hoofing the ball out. They were just literally slapping the French players.

11:22Pete Donaldson: When it was about 38 degrees, apparently that one was a particularly hot... Yeah, yeah, yeah.

11:26Marcus Speller: So my in-laws are from Philadelphia and they mentioned in the morning that it was 44 degrees centigrade real feel in the shade. Yeah. Oh, real feel trademark. Oh, love that. But the thing we have to give France credit for, particularly Mbappe actually, is they realised very early they're not getting anything for the referee. Paraguay taking the piss here. We just have to keep it calm. Yep. and there were moments obviously it tipped over but by and large I thought they they did as a good a job as they could possibly do and they're through they're through because of it

12:01Pete Donaldson: I thought it was a great shame for Paraguay though if I can say that the fact Peter that it was a penalty and it was it was a hell of a run deserved a pen at least yeah I mean when he's jinking away like that Desiree Duhay

12:14Marcus Speller: is there something quite unusual about getting a penalty running the other way

12:17Pete Donaldson: I know what you mean and that's my other point I was going to say That's what you're all complaining about, and you're like, come on. It's in the box. Yeah, it was a penalty all day long. You've got to have a box. The fact is that the referee didn't, again, the referee didn't give something so bleeding obvious. As one of the commentators said, I'd like to see a ref cam on that, and they're like, I'd better not show that. That sort of level of mistake.

12:39Marcus Speller: He was actually obscured by the referee giving away the middle finger when it was on the floor. In the city of Rutherford. Indeed, indeed. Indeed, but there are too many... Do you think the Paraguayans crack the Liberty Bell? Yeah, maybe.

12:54Pete Donaldson: Two-footed it, yeah. There's too many decisions at this World Cup where you go, that was outrageous, that was outrageous. I still think the Harry Kane one against the Alcon was a penalty all day long. But this is the problem with what this style of refereeing does. People, even some of the BBC pundits, like Rooney, for example, said, yeah, but he's looking for it, he's going down. and you start to kind of try and get on board with this referee. Yes, he was, because he knew he was going to get clattered by the goalkeeper. So, anyway, without going over that... It's not Munchausen syndrome, was it?

13:24Stockholm syndrome. Stockholm syndrome.

13:25Pete Donaldson: We've been Stockholm syndrome. That would be my argument. But this one, how the referee hasn't seen that, thank goodness it was given. Because if it wasn't given, you think, well, just stop it now, because this is ludicrous. But do you not think that, like, I think you spoke about Mbappe being a really good kind of lightning rush for a lot of stuff. And you're right. And he gave a bit back as well. He made a beeline for one of the Paraguayan players in the hydration break and gave him a little summing. He was swearing in Spanish left, right, and center. It was good stuff. He knew the focus was on him.

14:00And I think it was, yeah, very enjoyable.

14:02Pete Donaldson: But Mbappe's temperament, though, he knows what he is. He knows where the line is as well. Which is probably the best player in the world, or certainly one of them.

14:09Marcus Speller: He's grown up being targeted like that. Yeah, totally.

14:11Pete Donaldson: And he has the broad enough shoulders to do it. I don't think he's thin-skinned because it doesn't affect his game. I think he goes, oh, is it like that, is it? Yeah. You really want to, yeah, exactly. You really want to wind me up, absolutely fine. And of course, when he scored the penalty, which he was going to score all day long. Especially when the key was just, he just dived about two seconds too early. Yeah, well, the key... He's had a good game, old Gil, until that penalty. Yeah, indeed. But yeah, I mean, the chat now is with penalties. they say, what's the pressure penalty? Because there's so much, as I say, almost we're getting to the point of over-analyzing penalties.

14:42Pete Donaldson: And actually, if you looked at where they showed Mbappe put some of his penalties, it was to the keeper's left. Whereas, if you remember, certainly in the World Cup final, when he took three penalties last time round, he put them all in the same place. And I think maybe Hill thought, that's his safety penalty, if you like. But yeah, I remember thinking, I don't know, in this type of game, I would have fancied him to Penenka it. Do you know what I mean? It was that sort of, you know, in Mo Salah sort of fashion.

15:07Marcus Speller: Yeah, really take the air out of the situation.

15:09Pete Donaldson: Exactly, but the fact is, you know, he scores. And when they score, that was the game over because you knew Paraguay were not going to score.

15:16Marcus Speller: Can we dwell a bit more on, you mentioned pressure penalty there. Can we dwell a bit more on the events leading up to the taking of the penalty? Oh my goodness, yeah.

15:24Pete Donaldson: That has become a standard thing in this World Cup. Now you saw Senegal do it to Belgium. And the referees, which they won't, the referees should put that to bed and go, right, you back off now, right, yellow card. Anyone else? No. Yeah, put a little serving dish over the top of the penalty spot. Yes! Then reveal it. The penalty scuff. The money on Kondaiwami. Now you're talking. The penalty spot scuff. That should be a yellow card, I believe. Yeah, I'm gentlemanly conduct. Yeah, I think in the Prem and even probably Champions League. To the worms. To the worms.

15:56Marcus Speller: Pretty good for the worms. Brings them to the surface. That's a good point, actually. Right, that's us. Yeah, let the worms do the job, you know. Just the Dembele when he was standing there holding the ball. And obviously it's a decoy so that they don't... We all know you're not taking it, mate. But they don't rattle the actual penalty taker. And it was stupid because I thought like, Mbappe's always taking this. Don't fuck him up. But when he's holding it and he's got his back to the goal, and I think, was it the keeper? Scrapes the... No, it was the defender. The defender scrapes the penalty spot through Dembele's legs and he turns around and you're almost like, oh, fair play.

16:29Marcus Speller: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, he's got me. Cheeky.

16:31Pete Donaldson: He's still going to score. Cheeky. I very much enjoy it. I know he's part of a lot of the shithousing, but Matthias Galar's kind of general demeanor, I very much enjoy it, and I want to see. I know he plays in MLS, but I want to see more of him because he looks a little bit handsome, like Stallone was in his early years. He looks a little bit iconic, and I want to see more of him. But I want because he plays in MLS. Apple TV. Is that where you get the MLS? I believe so. It's the Fizzer Network. you've got to you're used to staying up late to watch football matches I know yeah I've completely changed my time I've turned it to my dad 1am starts it was always going to happen I did like the Kili Mbappe quote they thought that we'd show up in tuxedos to play but we know how to play dirty football too there's a lot to be said for that if you look at the

17:18Marcus Speller: how a lot of these players learned football it was you know concrete streets that kind of thing and you do lose it obviously you lose it a lot of those players play for luxury teams, I think we can describe them as. Like, they don't really have to think about doing anything for themselves. And I think moments like that, they probably relish, because it's a little bit like you turn to, you know, the people around you, and you're like, right, we're going to have to scrap here. And you kind of enjoy it, because it adds a little bit on whatever legacy they're going to create. This is the kind of game that they can point to in the way that Mbappe already has, and be like, the tuxedo quote, I mean, that's perfect.

17:55Marcus Speller: That'll live forever.

17:56Pete Donaldson: This is a Lehen fixture. Are we, yeah, I mean, I sort of, yeah. Are we being a touch generous to France here in that, you know, when England struggled to break down a side who put, I mean, Paraguay had all 11 men really behind the ball, didn't they? And France didn't create anything of note. And then obviously... It's a bit of a lesson for anyone who meets them in the next rounds. They were expected, like, they've hammered teams that were expected to defeat in this tournament. I just think so, that's it. And this wasn't obviously a test in football, as a test of how efficient their cut men were and how big their shin pads are, really.

18:30But I think they... I didn't think they came through this test with flying colours. Like you said, they didn't manage to break them down in Orton play, did they? They were running away from the goal. They were.

18:42Pete Donaldson: And like I say, the penalty was very much won. It wasn't a lucky one or anything. And look, they're through, and that's all that matters, really. But I just think maybe if that was England, people might say, oh, well, we didn't create anything. oh, we got like, yeah, it was a penalty, blah, blah, blah, blah, whereas it's France. And look, I ultimately... It's always going to be the violence, isn't it, I suppose. Yeah, and look, I agree that you're through. Bloody penalty or what? Did it cross the line? So I just want, yeah, it was...

19:08Marcus Speller: I think you're right to bring that up. I think those conversations are being had, though, just not, you know, like in France. Yes. Because they were already talking about, well, some of the discussions I saw about what happens when teams double treble up on Alisson, what do we do then? the fact that after Mbappe, I think Rabiot took the most shots. Yeah, he was having a go, wasn't he? Yeah, and just like pinging them over the bar. I wonder also if some of the French players were like, you think this is bad? You should see what his mum says about us. But I think those, you're right to bring that up.

19:41And I think also, I was so glad,

19:45Marcus Speller: I'm not just saying it because you're here and we're doing this show, but generally yesterday, I was like, I'm so glad I'm not watching England play this team. Because I think there's a few players who lose their head there. Like imagine the handprint on Anthony Gordon's chest. They're like, you know, properly chopping him. Yeah, I think they have the wares to do it, probably not in the way that you'd think, where it's like jinking through and hoping to get a clip here and there rather than a pass. But as you said, and as you explained, with that many people behind the ball, you're not going to find those like really intricate passes.

20:18Marcus Speller: You're going to have to create something out of nothing.

20:20Pete Donaldson: Well, I think for Paraguay, realistically, it was the only way they could approach the game, because they've seen Alise threading the balls through better defences. And also, as well, with the way they beat Germany, you know, it was a proper sort of smash and grab. But with this, I don't think this is not a template for Morocco. Absolutely not.

20:40Marcus Speller: They were smashing and grabbing in this game.

20:42Pete Donaldson: Yeah, they were, but not goals, just French players. Well, it's not a template for Morocco to play France. The way Paraguay did because Paraguay was 11 men behind the ball and there was very little attacking intent Can you just do that and then you've got some better players up top? No because I think No but Morocco also don't do it like stylistically No it would be off it I mean under the previous coach you know they were much more steely and well not steely that's the wrong word so they were a bit more conservative and they've still got that there but I think that they would express themselves a lot more and I think what we're going to see is France have a genuine test and it's the old sort of ah have they been tested all this sort of stuff France are going to be favourites for that game but it's a mouth-watering match because we know how good Morocco are and we're going to talk about them in the next part but I think yeah with Paraguay I totally understand why they set up like that as Tuchel suggested against DR Congo and we'll find out later today certainly with France though that is the last time in fact you could argue it's the only time really but certainly the last time France will have a game like that at this tournament.

21:47Pete Donaldson: And so therefore, it will be fascinating to see how they get on against Morocco. I do want to mention old Orlando Gil, old Gil, because he won the Man of the Match Award. So even in defeat, he got something. Made a great double save against Kylian Mbappe towards the end of the game. He's really good. I was really disappointed, though. They had a chance for, I think it was a long throw-in or a call. They had a chance, it might have been a long throw-in, put the ball in the box or something like that. And it was on 97, 98 minutes. he didn't come up for it. I know. It's like, get him in the ball.

22:19Pete Donaldson: You're waiting for the next one. Six foot six. I couldn't believe he never came up for it. We've still got three minutes. We'll be all right. You know, like, come on. Get him up there. What I did write about Paraguay, though, is that when you play a game like that and you're getting absolutely nothing, if you get within 30, I might even extend that to 35 yards from the goal, you have to shoot. Do you know what I mean? And there was a couple of efforts they had, and I remember thinking, The commentators were a bit harsh on one of the guys who hit it, and I think Mike Mannion dived fairly comfortably, but he worked the goalkeeper.

22:51Pete Donaldson: Oh, yeah, not the best decision. I was like, what was his other decision? You have to play, because you'll say, that's a low percentage play. Well, I would flip that and say, no, no, no, no. The low percentage of scoring is how you've set up. Therefore, taking a pot shot in a weird warped way is actually a high percentage play, because you're not going to score with 11 men sitting on the edge of your box. You're not going to score playing it back. This is the only way you are going to score. So that side of things, I quite enjoyed Paraguay. Any chance of having a shot there took it.

23:21Marcus Speller: They also made, you know, they didn't have players that were good enough to play that way and also, you know, I suppose, make an impact on France with their own attacking wares. What they were able to do is create such a frenzy within the game that they could just lump the ball up to Upamecano and Saliba and know that one in three times, they'll fuck up.

23:45Pete Donaldson: Yeah, and again, you are totally playing the percentage. It's almost like you're playing Sunday league football because you just, let's just stick it up in that area. Yeah, chances are he's not going to mess that up. But if he does, that's what we're going to go for.

23:58Marcus Speller: Because I actually felt a bit of sympathy, empathy maybe, for Celibro and Umpa Makano because the game was so wild. They were like, God, I cannot fuck up now. Yes. Even something as simple as like a ball in the air and they're challenging with like Nciso or Almiron. They've got a foot on them and they're like, we've got to keep the ball. We can't put it out of the play. And you see them cycling through all these different things. Their levels are different, aren't they? And they're playing like stupid back passes to Magnon and they're not quite getting it right. And those are the moments you talked about where the ball falls to a Paraguayan player and he has a pot shot.

24:32Marcus Speller: There was one actually in the second half on about 78 minutes, maybe 80-odd actually, where the ball drops to someone on the edge of the box, and if they have a bit more wears and take it down, they would have seen two players running through. Yeah, I remember the moment. And it's like, you could just hold on to the ball, and he just drags like half-roliant foot wide. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

24:53Pete Donaldson: Oh, dear. But France, they are through to the next round, and they will be playing Morocco. And coming up after this, we have our first host nation, Scalp.

25:36We'll be right back. of July clearance now through July 6th at Wayfair.com. Wayfair, every style, every home. There are moments that reveal who we are and who we're meant to become. For those born to lead, such moments call for a vehicle of equal distinction. Dynamic by design, uncompromising in execution, the Range Rover Sport was engineered for those rare individuals who demand the world and possess the conviction to claim it. When your time to lead arrives, you need a vehicle that rises to meet it. The Range Rover Sport. Exclusive offers available now. Explore further at RangeRover.com. We all belong outside.

26:16We're drawn to nature. It calls to us. Whether it's the recorded sounds of the ocean we doze off to, or the succulents that adorn our homes, Nature makes all of our lives richer, calmer, and frankly, better. Despite all this, we often go about our busy lives removed from it. But the outdoors is closer than we realize. With AllTrails, you can discover trails nearby or trails worth traveling to and explore confidently with offline maps and on-trail navigation. Whether you're looking for a laid-back walk with family, or something more adventurous to get your heart pumping. AllTrails gives you the tools you need to get out there and find your outside.

27:06Download the free app today and make the most of your summer with AllTrails.

27:19You know, I talk about managing success rate.

27:21Marcus Speller: I've got a 0 % sex rate. Sex rate? It's that as well.

27:26Pete Donaldson: What about the football anvil everybody? Jonathan Pearce there Being very candid Right then Saw the way he was looking at Matilda during Robot Wars Which was Matilda? Was she the one who was a She had a saw for a tail Rhino I thought she was like a Yeah maybe Was she a rhino with a hammery knife thing?

27:45Marcus Speller: No I thought Matilda had a saw for a tail I can't remember

27:50Pete Donaldson: Canada 0 Morocco 3 Pete Donaldson Morocco March on Jesse Marsh and his Canadian cavalry have gone back to Canada cavalry send the Mounties home yeah you get the sense of this match the result was correct but the manner in which it was dispatched with three goals like Morocco didn't play well but they scored a lot of goals and they're going to have to step it up against France yeah that is one of those games where it's a shame really Canada it's like how long can you keep them going and they had a couple of chances and you just simply have to put them away. Yeah. Because you knew in that second half Morocco would turn the screw.

28:31I know it's kind of very easy to sort of choose their star player and go, he was a big miss, but Alphonso Davies was a big miss and it seemed like... The whole tournament, you might. Yeah, but I think there were signs that he was going to sort of do something in this match and obviously Marsh didn't have access to him, which is a real disappointing situation, really.

28:48Pete Donaldson: Yeah, I'm glad that Davies played some football in the previous game where he got, what, 10, 15 minutes or something like that because it would have been... Oh, look, it's a sickness. The fact is that injuries kept him out of his home tournament. I know he played in the previous World Cup and scored and so on, but for him to be such an obvious staffer, one of the best players, if not the best player in their history, you might argue, to not be able to play really in the tournament, it is sad, but like I say, I'm glad he got some playing time, even though very restricted, just a handful. but he got on the pitch.

29:24And you'd probably say it was probably too early for Canada to be a host nation because it's their first win. They had their first win at the finals. They qualified from the groups the first time. First knockout win. First knockout win as well. I mean, it's not bad, is it?

29:36Pete Donaldson: I think it's been a success. He's playing a very good side who, I mean, that first goal when Unai scores, lovely free kick routine. It's that type of thing where you go, yeah, that to me just really showed the difference between, you know, an experience inside who know their way around a tournament and you could see, I forget which Canada player it was, he just sees the danger too late and goes and it misses him and as soon as that ball comes in you're thinking this is, you know That's coaching, that's bad coaching. You've just got to hope he spoons it, you know, and yeah and into the corner it goes and you think yeah exactly and then, but look I admire the way Canada went about it because they didn't think, right, okay let's just, they had to go for it and left the back door wide open and that's how it goes.

30:22Pete Donaldson: But they've won a lot of hearts and minds in this tournament. They're Canadian heroes, Peter. Yeah, Canadian heroes. According to Jesse Marsh. Yeah, Marsh said a lot of stuff after this match. What was your favourite stuff he said after this match? It was after the previous match, of course. Well, I always, I think I said the one, I always dislike when managers specifically use the name of the journalist as a bit of a power move or a bit of a, I'm a good guy, really, kind of move. It annoyed me when I interviewed the Australian fellow who plays Wolverine. It annoys me when - Hugh Jackman. Hugh Jackman.

30:56It annoys me when - Hugh Jackman went, well, Peter. Yeah, power move. That annoys you? Yeah, it annoyed me that. Power move. I was just like, you don't care. Why is that a power move?

31:05Marcus Speller: Did he do that really alpha thing where did he walk in the room and then introduce himself? Yes. Like a cunt. Like an absolute cunt. We know you are, Wolverine. He probably squeezed your hand as well. He did. Eye contact. Eye contact as well. Ask me about my life.

31:18Pete Donaldson: He wasn't polite to you, was he? Yeah, he was.

31:21Marcus Speller: He made me a coffee. Bastard. Dickhead. And then he handed it to you with the handle and then you drank it. Yeah. I bet it was a bit hot as well, wasn't it? Did he stick around for you to drink it? Yeah. Yeah. Signed everything I asked of him. Had a selfie. Did some social media stuff. Scumbag. Scumbag. Him and Jesse Marsh, the worst. You know, he goes around calling himself the greatest showman as well. Jesse Marsh is the greatest showman He absolutely loves it He is up there He's up there We said that he would do Like a Phil Brown style Kind of on the pitch Kind of speech Phil Brown's double Is getting mentioned here Five weeks into the World Cup He's Mr America isn't he America's I'm sure he's

32:04Pete Donaldson: Totalled up there on his Harley I'd like to think he was Driving in between the stadiums Yeah Nice The matches Well yeah Jesse Marsh said I'd rather be them than us I think obviously In the grand scheme of things Clearly he would rather be In the next round But he was saying The way we played I was so proud of my team, blah, blah, blah. What have you got all those delicious spices? I think he's probably... Jesse? Yeah, goodness. More of cheese curd money. Maybe. But the thing is, though, Peter, you can say this stuff in a roundabout way and not come across as a bit of a knob. You don't have to say, I'd rather be them.

32:35Pete Donaldson: I'd rather be us than them, sorry. Are we just kind of not used to football managers being expressive? No, no, no, it's not that. Don't bring Canadians into it. It's not that. It's Jesse Marsh. And look, I actually think... It's not that it's Jesse Marsh. I think... Don't be harsh. It's Jesse Marsh. Well, okay. Let's remind ourselves what he said. I'd rather be us than them. As good as Morocco is, I'd rather be us. Matt, we were the better team. You know, so that... You know what you can do, though? Go on.

33:04Marcus Speller: Go be you at home. Yeah. You're out now. So to meet him more than halfway, he's obviously very passionate. I feel like what he was trying to say was the upside long term for Canada is exciting and he wouldn't want to be anywhere else. But yeah, you're right. As you were saying before you played the clip, there are roundabout ways of just talking about your own team and saying, I suppose, what I've just said in that there's so much potential in this team. You've seen what we do. Imagine what we can do in four years' time. This, that and the other. You don't need to shit on Morocco.

33:37Pete Donaldson: Yeah, and it's not because who has an American accent or he's enthused. It's not to do with that. It is a little bit of that, yeah. but it's it genuinely isn't that it is it's it's the fact that his the way he got Canada playing at this tournament and what he's done I honestly I think he's done he's done them really he's done them as solid he's done them as service service is a better word thank you for your service Jesse Marsh well no I do I do think that because I think I think you have to have a kind of a strong leader who again is experienced in the game and and and is willing to kind of maybe say things like, you know, you're here or get them going.

34:16Pete Donaldson: I actually quite like all that. And I think if that's his style, then great. It's just ever so slightly rainy. It's just, you know. Do it in French. Meet them halfway. There we are. You could have done it in French, Jesse.

34:28Marcus Speller: Unite the country. That would have been brilliant. Famously, unite the country. We're speaking French in Canada. Because there's no issues.

34:40Marcus Speller: That's a really good point, actually. because it's not really something I considered but when you lose 3-0 regardless of how good a tournament it has been for Canada that's a pasting at this level at that stage as soon as Morocco scored they just turned the head down knowing full well there's not much else yeah and Morocco's quality on the ball was sensational

34:59Pete Donaldson: but in that first half he got them it was right but they needed to score in that first you've got to score when you're on top in a game like that and I think again the way Marsh set them up and got them going I think he did really really well I genuinely do and I give him praise for that.

35:13Marcus Speller: Oliver Shea's chance when he rolls the ball brilliantly and takes it onto his left foot. It's a shame. It would have been such a great goal,

35:22Pete Donaldson: wouldn't it? And, you know, Canada, they've made an impression on this tournament and more than some people would have perhaps given them credit for before the start of the tournament. So genuinely, all that stuff. Yeah, it is, it is. And they've been beaten by a proper side as well. They've not gone out to a team where you go, oh, on another day. I understand, even if they've gone in at the break 1-0 up, I still think Morocco would have had enough and they would have turned it on. But they've been beaten by a proper team who have, as I say, aren't dark, I suppose you can have them as dark holes, but they're not a surprise package by any stretch of the imagination.

35:51I think you look at the dugout and Coach Moore, he speaks fire languages, he's wearing a black t-shirt and a smoky sort of jacket. That is proper prestige manager stuff. He's going to out-french the French

36:02Pete Donaldson: is what you're saying.

36:04Marcus Speller: I mean, yeah, they're an exceptional team. They're players in that 11 who perform really crucial, particularly the attackers and the Hakimi in there as well

36:16Pete Donaldson: Look at Buadi in the midfield I mean, how young is he? 18, yeah He will be one of those midfield players for a top team that will he'll probably win the Champions League at some point He's that good, the way people are talking about him He will be the centre of whether it's Manchester City or Real Madrid He'll just build a super team around him. Exactly. He will be that player in that midfield for many years. You would have thought.

36:44Marcus Speller: You know, he scored a couple of goals yesterday. He's just a quality operator. That second finish. Yeah. Or the goal for the second. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The finish for the second goal, pardon me, was just class like running full tilt on a counter attack. Especially Talby as well. Talby started that move, brings it in. Is that extra body? Diaz, again, is like in this fascinating space at the moment. where he's just the person taking it all along and not necessarily taking all the glory. The gutting thing was Saibari's injury. Yes. Because he has been so good to watch and that is a huge, huge miss.

37:21Pete Donaldson: One question I would ask you is, has Issa Diop done enough to begin to start games for Fulham in the new season?

37:28Marcus Speller: This is the cool thing about World Cup when stuff like this happens and it's like, hold on, we haven't Issa Diop. What? It's incredible, isn't it? It doesn't start that much. Does it kind of also make sense? That's why you signed him from West Ham?

37:41Pete Donaldson: Yeah, he's like back up, like third choice,

37:43Marcus Speller: but there was obviously, it would have been silver, wouldn't it? But I clearly saw something there, like, I don't think they realise how good he is. We'll just take him.

37:51Pete Donaldson: Yeah, absolutely. And in the squad he goes. Morocco have won four World Cup knockout matches now. Two in 2022, two in this tournament. That is as many as all the other African nations combined. Yeah. That's how good this side are. And lest we forget, in four years time, Peter, they are co-hosts. Yes. I mean, they'll need... Well, that's the thing, though. They do play quite a lot of teams like Madagascar and stuff in their friendlies and stuff. So you do sort of go... Okay, what's that got to do with anything? I'm just saying that as a horse nation, that's exactly what they've been doing. They need to choose their friendlies a bit better.

38:25Marcus Speller: They're not playing the cartoon film.

38:27Pete Donaldson: Yeah, I was gonna say. So I'm talking about Morocco, you know, outperforming themselves, you know, back-to-back quarterfiles. First time African side has done that. The stat there was there. But the pressure will be off when they're hosting next time. And you're worried that they're going to play free. But, yeah, I forgot the but. But if they play friendlies against Madagascar specifically, then the whole thing, all the money that the king of Morocco has piled into this, academies and all this, it could come crashing down. Down right. We can't play this in England. Come and play England at Villa Park on a wet, windy Tuesday night, please.

39:04Why are you running?

39:06Marcus Speller: Why are you just sticking around playing a ferret and a hippo in a grass skirt? Play some real teams. Stop playing the giraffes! Very useful. Is there a giraffe in Madagascar?

39:17Pete Donaldson: Very useful from set pieces, aren't they? Can they get much power on the head? Yeah, they can actually. You're not going to win a header against a giraffe, are you? Well, Dan Byrne might. Dan Byrne, you pick up the giraffes. All of them.

39:30Marcus Speller: How many Dan Burns would it take to get to a Giraffe? How many Ben Neveses? Ben Nevi? Ben Nevi?

39:38Pete Donaldson: Did you see that thing? Do you have to have three tours? I forget where it was. Was it on the BBC where they were like, look, here's the Azteca Stadium at altitude, and then here's like the... what's the building in Dubai? The...

39:48Marcus Speller: Burj Khalifa. Yeah, they've got all that.

39:51Pete Donaldson: Right at the end, Dan Burn. Yeah. He should start. He plays at altitude all the time.

39:57Marcus Speller: You know, the thing used to be like, what is that in old money? Is old money now Dan Byrne?

40:02Pete Donaldson: Yeah, you've got to be old, old, old, old money if you really want old money. It depends how old you are for the money, I suppose. Right, and yes, Morocco. They're going to play France in the next round. That's a mouth-watering one. This is where the ties become mouth-watering as well.

40:16Marcus Speller: It's a replay of the semi from 22, isn't it?

40:19Pete Donaldson: It is, yes. Exactly. Morocco owe them one, don't they?

40:23Marcus Speller: They do, yeah. A bit of history there as well. Can we say that? A bit of history?

40:27Pete Donaldson: I think we can. Apparently it's about three Dan Burns to get to one tall giraffe. A tall giraffe? One an average half giraffe. God blimey. Crying out loud.

40:36Marcus Speller: I thought you were googling whether they had odd toes. We don't want a centre back giraffe. Give us like an inverted winger giraffe. How tall is an inverted winger giraffe?

40:43Pete Donaldson: Oh dear. Talking about... They've got two toes on each foot. Oh, they've got four feet. I forgot. Bloody Nora. Bloody Nora. It's an even-toured ungulate. two footed giraffe two footed giraffe can play

40:58Marcus Speller: either side play left play the right great it's like Dembele I have a happy touch for a two footed giraffe you out

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42:49Pete Donaldson: There's a tasty tie tonight though, Peter. Testy tie tonight. Brazil versus Norway. Oh. That's class, isn't it? Norway have never, ever, ever, ever, ever lost a game against Brazil. Ever. Never will. If history tells us anything, it never will. I know. Brazil might not even turn up. It is a good tie this way. I mean, Norway, they've not disappointed. It's a brilliant game.

43:12Marcus Speller: It is going to be a brilliant game. It is. The fact that you get, you know, what was already one of the more box office duels in the Premier League of Gabriel and Haaland and the idea that you get them to do that for their country in a World Cup, it's a bit extra.

43:29Pete Donaldson: It is, it is, yeah. I mean, Norway kind of, in their last match, they took a little bit of time to sort of get going, but they got there, they'll have to be at it, you know, a bit more this time round, but I do fancy this one. It's a delicious, delicious bit of football match. It is a delicious bit of football match, yeah. I mean, as I said earlier, and a lot of people have said it as well, that the Carlo Ancelotti factor and some of those Brazilian players, they're just, you can kind of slice open that Brazilian midfield and blah, blah, blah, but then, you know, you've got the two centre-backs, you've got the goalkeeper who know what they're doing.

44:06Pete Donaldson: But there's just a canniness about them.

44:08Marcus Speller: Yeah. And do you know the way he was talking about, I know we covered a bit on this show, but the way Ancelotti was talking about what he said to them at halftime in the Japan game. And obviously they come out and they win the second half, they win the game. And it was decided that they were a bit more switched on, a bit more structured. And obviously Ancelotti's not going to reveal everything. But he basically said, yeah, just ask them to chill out a bit. Yeah. Yeah. Just like, you know, have a puff on this.

44:37Pete Donaldson: Have a puff on this again. But we knew that's what he was going to do and that's why he's there. Because, you know, we talk about England and other countries who have enormous pressure at World Cups. That's where the hoodoo comes from, because they just get stressed out. Yeah, but that's... They've never been so poor in the midfield. I know, but it's... That's the annoying thing. You look at the names in that midfield, but yeah, it's just not the most mobile. But I mean, Casimiro, people are like, oh, you know, Ancelotti's kept him on. Of course he has, because he knows that that midfield is going to concede space.

45:05Pete Donaldson: There are going to be gaps, and there are going to be opportunities for Casimiro to head the football into the back of the net. Yeah, yeah. And so, you know, he's going to play. He's not going to take him off. The surprise was he brought on Hendrik, which was this thing in Brazil, isn't there, that Ancelotti hates him. He's never going to play him. The memes have been sensational. They have been very, very good, yeah. But Hendrik came on in that game and made a difference. And I think that we're going to see Hendrik coming on off the bench. I don't think he's going to start games. We know roughly how Ancelotti's going to play.

45:37Pete Donaldson: But that calmness in the dressing room, it's almost like Brazil are in a somewhat somewhat comparable sort of space if you like with England now clearly Brazil have won it way more times and much more recently but that doesn't matter to Brazil

45:53Marcus Speller: England have a better squad than Brazil

45:55Pete Donaldson: well yeah sure but in terms of the history in terms of the pressure and so on and so forth I mean when you know I remember you know the first World Cup was 1990 as I've mentioned many times I actually never thought of Brazil being a huge force I knew they were sort of a good team but that's because they hadn't won the World Cup for 20 years. You know, 1997 to 1994, long time for a side like Brazil who'd won it, bearing in mind, what, 58, 62 and 70. They were used to winning it all the time, essentially, in that period. They've got a long period of time. Well, they've got the same amount of time, 0-2 to 26, as they had done in that period.

46:28Pete Donaldson: And in between times, only one semi-final, well, obviously, they were hammered by Germany. To get Ancelotti in there, again, can you imagine some of those Brazilian players at half-time in the dressing room against Japan because despite Japan being a good side they're not traditionally one of the big boys at the World Cup they would have been well I don't know I can't put you know words in their mouth but it would have been an understanding of someone that were absolutely bricking it and you can see the headlines and you can see the worry and so on and that's where a man like Ancelotti earns his stripes and that's where we hope but I would say we've already seen bits of it with Tuchel at this tournament as well same for England and DR Congo in that second hydration break keep you know we'll talk about England on the pod later Well, hearing Tuchel speaking about the stadium they're going to be playing in later on today, slash in the early morning, it feels a bit Ancelotti-esque.

47:20It's just kind of like, this is what we're here for.

47:23Marcus Speller: You're fighting against the history of teams, aren't you? And when you're an outsider, you come in and you have that distance from it and therefore can add a bit of context. I suppose the context resides there, isn't it? Because every one of those Brazilian players at half time in the Japan game would think, this is the game that makes me a hated figure in Brazil. We're halfway through that game now. If you look at Brazil's history of the times they've fallen at World Cups in significant ways, you get people in supermarkets telling you that you're the man who lost Brazil the World Cup. No one has recovered from the 7-1 defeat.

48:06Marcus Speller: They all talk about it and they carry around with them everywhere. And I'm not saying it's going to be the same scale as that, but if they don't get this Norway game right, because of the way Norway play, this could be a game that goes in the annals of that, you know, the bad part of their history.

48:25Pete Donaldson: Totally, yeah. I think they've got way more pressure. You know, people often laugh at England fans and say, oh, you always think you're going to win the World Cup. It's not true. We think that there's a chance and you have hope and you go into a tournament thinking, but you know what, with the squad we've had, you know, and it's more like the history of the football's there. You've got the Premier League, you've got some big players, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It's the disappointment of going out with a whimper. That's what it is. That's where the hand wringing comes from. I don't think any England fan really goes, well, of course we're going to win the World Cup.

48:52Pete Donaldson: Ridiculous. But Brazil, because of their history, it's ramped up way more because they've won five of the buggers, you know. and so I think this match you're right Vish I think that this is another one of those games like Japan they're playing a very good opponent but not a they haven't been at the World Cup since 98 Norway and so I think the pressure is going to be huge but again that man Ancelotti I mean Ancelotti said with regard to the critics that he faced after Brazil beat Japan he said I've prepared for over 1 ,400 matches that may not be enough to understand football but it's certainly a good amount of experience only one person has prepared more matches than me Alex Ferguson Steve Bruce in it that's what Steve Bruce used to say all the time maybe that's what it is show me some respect acknowledge me probably Brucey must be but having that manager who's comfortable in those moments where you are up against it where you have 20 minutes to go and you're down or whatever having that I think that will keep Brazil in good stead but it's a fascinating game it really really is and early Haaland will be relishing that.

49:56Pete Donaldson: Did you see that during Argentina's win over Cape Verde, someone messaged Haaland on Snapchat saying, Messi scored. Don't think you're getting that golden boot, mate. And he simply replied, true. I mean, it's chilling when you see a grown man on Snapchat. Anyway, but I pray for a leg break for Haaland. Here we go. Just because... Is this in the sort of... He spends... Is this on a theatre kind of way? No, no, no. You want him to actually snap a bone? Tib and fib the whole thing out for a season. Because he's simply so good on social media. He's simply so good at just pissing out. What are other ways for him to do that?

50:33I want more downtime so he can piss about more. He's very good at pissing about. Let's see how shitposting you can get.

50:42Marcus Speller: The trauma of someone catastrophically breaking their legs for an entire year and spending time on the internet. Why is that a good combination?

50:53Pete Donaldson: Yeah. Oh, Vish, yeah. His dad couldn't do it. Well, I don't know. We're seconds away from him. I almost guarantee by the end of this tournament, it's a mid-tournament prediction. Look what you've done to Vish. He's all over the place. He's allergic to these opinions. He's going to do a video of him being scared by a mirror because there was that AI version of Harland being scared by his own reflection in a mirror. And I think he will do a version of that once they're a little bit deeper in this tournament, if indeed they go deeper in this tournament. Well, but call me old-fashioned. I hope he doesn't break his leg.

51:29Pete Donaldson: We're an old-fashioned challenge. I hope we have a good clean... Email in. Email in should Carl and break his leg so he can do more shitposting. Yeah, but let's hope for a good clean bout. Exactly. Speaking of a good clean table full of food, last time we spoke about Norway on the show, Vish was on, and he remarked that he'd never tried Norwegian brown cheese. Oh. So I was late for the show today because I went to the Scandinavian kitchen down the road Down there. On Titchfield Street and bought some brown cheese, Marcus. Alright. Would you like to taste some brown cheese? I'm gonna have to, aren't I?

52:06Come on! Let's have some brown cheese.

52:07Pete Donaldson: Let's have some brown cheese. We're not just letting this happen, are we? Yeah, we are. We did a live show in Oslo. I thought that was cake when you brought that out. We did a live show in Oslo a number of years ago. and what did you what did you have was it pickled Roamops just did you come and I go on Roamops no so bloke in the crowd got you some sort of come and I go on Roamops Roamops that's a knife innit Gordon Bennett how's he got hold of that so yeah anyway it's a really good idea

52:35Marcus Speller: well done to everyone involved

52:37Pete Donaldson: oh Gordon don't do that for those of you listening and not watching Pete literally threw the knife up a very very large kitchen knife and caught it with the handle if I'm honest with you he did very very well definitely put your thumb

52:49Marcus Speller: in the way when you do that.

52:51Pete Donaldson: Yeah, I mean, it is brown cheese. I don't really know how I'm meant to... It's the colour of caramel. It looks like fudge. It does look like caramel. So this is going to be really disappointing when we eat that.

53:02Marcus Speller: And so presumably we garnish it with the beetroot salad that you want to.

53:05Pete Donaldson: Which again looks like some sort of strawberry thing. This is annoying. My mind, my head is going, ooh.

53:10Marcus Speller: I mean, look at that.

53:11Pete Donaldson: Ah, dearie me. My mind is going, this is going to be a lovely sweet treat. So I'm going to be disappointed with this. Let's get the cheese out. By the way, while you're doing that, I do want to say that...

53:21Marcus Speller: I'll just put the other notes I wrote away.

53:23Pete Donaldson: Flipping Nora. But before you do, I do want to say that, Pete, you forgot the classic wedding song by Cameo that often finishes a wedding. Oh, candy. I was shouting, it's candy. I think it was candy. I think if you go back onto the recording, I did say, I think it's candy. Right. How much of this are we eating, by the way?

53:42Marcus Speller: Why don't we just do one slice? Don't worry, what? Why don't we just do one slice?

53:45Pete Donaldson: I bet it was expensive from a Scandi shot, wasn't it? Yeah, it was. How much? How much? Go and tell us. I don't know. I've not seen it. I don't know whether it's... You don't know what you steal it, did you? But we did get a Meatballs for two, for£10. Well, there we go. Vish, what are you doing after the show? I think we might need a palate cleanser. Yes, yeah. Lovely brown cheese. So about ten... Can I just have it on... I don't want a cracker with that. I want the pure... If you want, but I mean, yeah. Smells alright, actually. About ten years ago... Stop pointing with the knife! About ten years ago, a lorry carrying this brown cheese...

54:20basically got set on fire, you know, ignited somehow in a tunnel. And because of the sugar and because of the oil and because of the fat, it burned for four days.

54:30Pete Donaldson: Four days. They couldn't get rid of it. Four days. Right, let's get this done. People want to finish this pod now. Right, are we ready? Are they still listening? No one's still listening now. That's what I mean, yeah. You want some of this? Right, here we go. No, I'm not going. That's too much. Bloody Nora. Right, I'm going to have a go. My breakfast.

54:54Pete Donaldson: What is happening here?

54:57Marcus Speller: That's alright, you know

54:58Pete Donaldson: It's alright It's a very distinct taste, but it's alright It's not as sweet as you think it should be Yeah I think it needs to be stronger But otherwise, personally I can see why people like it, though I can see why if you're from there Try it with the beetroot it's quite distinctive it's lovely listening to people who eat it we need to go out of 10 just hold up your digits I'm going to say a solid 6 Vish do you know the dance to candy by Wadab nobody does I think I could get I wouldn't be able to do it now it's not even in the video I can't even research it on there if people were doing it I could get involved do you know what's a big thing in a Mexican wedding is the old Billy Ray Cyrus It's a line dancing one Did Billy Ray Cyrus?

55:53Pete Donaldson: Icky Brecky Heart Obviously that was his big one Cotton Eye Joe? Not Cotton Eye Joe A bit of line dancing I say that happened at the Mexican wedding I was at But you know when something happens and everyone And I was like oh is that what's going on The Macarena of a Spanish one Almost certainly

56:13Marcus Speller: If England lose to Mexico Can we smash up a Chipotle? I'd like to, I don't like Chipotle. Do you know? It's just a rubbish version of whatever you like. Should we set fire to a Oaxaca?

56:26Pete Donaldson: No. Right. Okay, definitely not. Sorry, that's the brown cheese talking.

56:33Marcus Speller: Brown cheese was my nickname at school, actually.

56:37Pete Donaldson: Thanks for listening to the football round. Part of the ACOS Create Network. Vish and I will be back later today to preview England versus... No one's listening. Everyone's switched off, let's be honest. I'm a lovely fetter. Yeah. Vish and I will be back later today to preview England versus Mexico. And tomorrow, myself, Luke and Vish will be live on YouTube for the Ramble at 10.30. Can't wait. Come on, England. Thank you, Peter. Come on, England. Thank you, Vish. Come on, England. And thank you, Norwegian brown cheese. Or Norwegian wood, as the Beatles might call it. Terrible.

57:11Marcus Speller: Terrible exit, that.

57:16The Football Ramble is a Stack Production and part of the Acast Creator Network.

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