Radio 1's Matt and Mollie: I’m finding my voice! Back yourself like you back your mate

0:01Fearne Cotton: Hello and welcome to Happy Place with me, Fearne Cotton. This is the show that helps you talk to yourself like you talk to your best mate. Today I'm chatting to Matt Edmondson and Mollie King.

0:13Mollie King: I think a lot of my life I do go around just thinking, oh God, am I an idiot and are people thinking that I am? And you do do that thing of sort of overcompensating because you want to sort of either prove a point or show that you're not the thing that you're worrying about. but I'm sort of judging myself.

0:31Matt Edmondson: As Mole's best friend, it's really hard watching her have that internal dialogue with herself. The world loves you. And the only person I see at the moment who doesn't is you.

0:45Fearne Cotton: Do you know what is making me buzz with joy at the moment? It's the real obvious change of seasons. It's a very basic thing to say, but I think because we've had such an unbelievably wet start to the year weather-wise. It's the relief at just seeing even a square of blue sky. And there was a particular day not long ago where it smelled like spring. I don't know what that smell is, an indescribable smell of hope. That's what it feels like. And just seeing magnolia trees blooming and white blossom on the trees I feel so grateful that spring is blooming it's just it's the best isn't it it's like oh my god we can unfurl our tightly tensely woven bodies outwards and like stretch our arms wide and wear the odd t-shirt and it is really the simple things isn't it and I think we've really battled through this winter if you're listening in the UK that is it's been shit.

1:53Fearne Cotton: If you live in another country with better weather, I mean, good God, you lucky, lucky buggers. But now I think we're feeling that absolute gratitude. One of my friends who is originally from the States, who's moved here is like, how do you guys cope with this weather? But she said she found a new appreciation for the spring, just having been through that horrible, horrible winter. So let's talk about our guest today who brought me so much happiness on the day of the recording of this. Now look obviously Matt Edmondson has been on Happy Place before. We chatted remotely a few years ago and we had a really deep chat about things like music supporting his mental health, his cyclothymia diagnosis and also his dad's suicide as well.

2:42Fearne Cotton: He and Molly present a Radio 1 show together and they're also releasing a new podcast called Novel Idea. So it's really lovely to get to catch up with the two of them together. I mean we lulled our heads off. It's a chaotic catch up to an extent in the best possible way. It was just so much fun. We dipped into some really interesting places. I am fascinated by Matt's mind and how Matt sees the world. We all need to be a bit more Matt. He has the confidence to just ask for what he wants in life and I love that. Also the insecurities that I think we all have but probably no one else notices or colludes with.

3:27Fearne Cotton: That's the interesting part and Molly talks brilliantly about that. Debating what cool means and if we even give a toss about it and also how to reach a place of being really comfortable in your own skin and essentially liking yourself.

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5:33Fearne Cotton: right to the chat with matt and molly in just a tick but i've got something exciting to tell you first i'm going on a little book tour my new book is called likable and i'm really chuffed with this book it's the most honest book i've written it's out on march the 12th and it's about how i am very much still learning to break free from the need to please everyone all of the time my brilliant friend Paul Nabel who you actually heard on the podcast just a few weeks ago is going to be interviewing me for these little book tour sessions we're basically just going to have a really good chat and you can get involved in that conversation too and I'd love it if you came along I will be gutted slash like well embarrassed if I turn up to these venues and there's four people there I mean I have sleepless nights about this shit so even just to stop that from happening for me if you could be so kind come along if you're in these local areas please god I'll give you a hug if you come we're in Edinburgh on the 10th of March York on the 14th of March and Guildford on the 15th of March and actually I think that Guildford day is Mother's Day so if you want to treat your mum that's a really good Mother's Day gift come along with your mum there'll be a link to get your tickets in the show notes I'll hopefully see you there now you join us in the middle of Matt telling us about how he likes to generally live in total chaos.

7:19Matt Edmondson: I've come up with a lot of bad ideas. Yes, same. And actually, Moll's a fantastic barometer for quality. Okay. Because I must have pitched about 10 podcast ideas. What were some of the stinkers? Well, the one that I remember that it was an immediate no.

7:31Mollie King: I don't even remember this.

7:33Matt Edmondson: And it would be good, this, but she doesn't want to do it. And I can see why. Molly's never seen a Marvel movie, ever. And I said, we should watch in chronological order every Marvel movie. And then you can give your critique along the way. Because at the moment, she doesn't know who anyone is. She couldn't identify Spider-Man out of a lineup of men or spiders. Got you. And I thought it'd be an amazing journey for Moll to have, like as a person who's not even a hater, but like indifferent.

8:00Fearne Cotton: I thought you've not got time for it. I've just never seen it. But we would watch it as part of the podcast. So the listener has to sit through the whole film? No, no, no. No bits, okay. No, no, no. This was my reaction.

8:12Matt Edmondson: Credits roll, we go, welcome to the podcast. We've just watched Iron Man 2. Molly, tell us what you thought of Robert Downey Jr.

8:20Fearne Cotton: Fern, what do you think of this idea? Be honest. It's niche. It's a niche idea. And again, I love how your brain works. It's an idea. I reckon there'd be a lot of Marvel fans out there that'd be very interested. Yeah, probably frustrated as well because you don't know what you're talking about.

8:36Mollie King: I think they'd find that really annoying. Annoying, yeah. That's the flaw maybe.

8:39Fearne Cotton: I'm annoying enough as it is anyway. You're absolutely not. Not at all. But this idea that you're doing is genius. So how did this idea come to you? Where were you? What happened?

8:50Matt Edmondson: I can't quite remember. I mean, we were talking about doing something. We always want to spend more time together, right? So what can we do that's a project outside of all the stuff we already do, which is basically hang out all the time. What else can we – what other excuse can we have? And I got it into my head that it might be a fun thing to try and write a novel together. And I think it was maybe after – you know, like those drawings you do when you were a kid where someone draws the head and then you hand it. and someone else draws a body and then someone else draws the legs and you unfurl it and go, okay, that is a weird looking thing.

9:27Matt Edmondson: I thought, what if we do that? Words. And I pitched it to Mol and you were, well, you can say how you felt about it initially.

9:35Mollie King: I felt a bit anxious because I've got a weird relationship with books in that I immediately get that feeling in my tummy. It takes me back to school and I feel like a lot of anxiety of like, oh I don't want to read out loud in front of my classmates I can't read very well I'm dyslexic so any mention of like you've got to read this and everyone's going to listen to you I was like oh Matt I was like this thing this book idea I don't think I'm the person for this

10:04Matt Edmondson: and I said try just try it try we'll try one and if you hate it well we don't have to do it again but knowing Mole and knowing that she everything she turns her hand to she is annoyingly good at I was like she's gonna she's gonna smash this and I and I sort of felt like oh maybe it's one of those things you can do to to boost your confidence because you go this is like worst nightmare territory I'm gonna write something it's gonna get read out and then people are gonna take the piss out of it which is basically you know in any in a lot of friendships like it's built on a foundation of taking the mick out of each other yeah yeah um but but this had this extra sensitivity of like, oh, kind of a deep vulnerability with you of, are people going to think I'm stupid?

10:48Matt Edmondson: Are people going to think that my writing isn't as good as the writing that Matt's done? What happens if I make a joke and it doesn't land? What happens if I can't pick up a thread on this character? And actually, it transpired that you were annoyingly good at it.

11:04Mollie King: I wouldn't say that, but I did like the challenge. First of all, I was like, oh gosh, exactly what Matt said. I was really scared. And, you know, every single point that you mentioned there, I was worried that I just wouldn't be able to do it and that I would look like an idiot. Because I think a lot of my life, I do go around just thinking, oh God, am I an idiot? And are people thinking that I am? And that's all just come from my sort of life at school, I think really. But once we got stuck into the pod, we had so much fun, like proper belly laughing where you can't stop laughing and you go home, you have to call each other afterwards and be like, I can't stop thinking about that ridiculous thing you said.

11:43Mollie King: It's just been so much fun, hasn't it?

11:46Matt Edmondson: Yeah, it has. And it's been, we didn't know if it was going to work. And we did the first episode. And so the format is that we're writing this novel, one chapter at a time, taking it in turn. So I'll do chapter one, Mulder's chapter two, back to me for chapter three. So as you'll hear, there's a sort of, there's a bit of tension at the beginning because my ideas for the book aren't necessarily what Molly thinks it should be. and then And you've both

12:13Fearne Cotton: got to be happy for it to be cohesive Totally Absolutely Well I would say

12:17Matt Edmondson: the first couple of chapters we're slightly at loggerheads and you don't like the main character No that feels like an issue

12:24Mollie King: Can't stand him firm He feels like a show off to me and I think I'm not getting on board with this guy No But he's the main character so it's quite annoying Well Well My first chapter don't mention him He doesn't get mentioned Right Which is you know

12:35Matt Edmondson: if I was reading a book and the lead character disappeared for the entire second chapter despite it being in the same scene, I would probably move on to a different book.

12:44Fearne Cotton: But you have to cope with that. I have to cope with that. Chapter three. Yeah.

12:47Matt Edmondson: Well, I don't cope with it well in chapter two because I genuinely thought like, when's he coming in? When's he coming in? Like, was she going to do like a big reveal at the end? What's happening? And it was, he's never mentioned. Great. So I, in chapter three, obviously I had to bring him back and I tried to merge our two worlds together. And then as the book progresses, you end up kind of writing each other into a bit of a corner sometimes. So you have to. You have to incorporate the other person's stuff. And I think by about episode four or five, we really find some synergy.

13:19Mollie King: We do, yeah. It takes about four or five chapters. But oh my goodness, we get so stuck into it, Fern. Obsessed. We gave each other, we had to write it within a week. And it's been so consuming. As much as we're joking with it, we really want our chapters to be good. We really want to outdo the other one. That's the point of it. We are competitive, aren't we? And it feels like, right, I need my chapter this time to be better than his one.

13:44Matt Edmondson: You're kind of looking to impress each other, but also to maybe sort of throw a banana skin in their direction.

13:52Fearne Cotton: See how they cope with this. See how they cope with that.

13:54Matt Edmondson: There were a couple of times I left it on quite big cliffhangers, which were then immediately ignored. Brilliant. So I had other things, Fern.

14:04Mollie King: I had to sew other ideas. Other ideas.

14:06Matt Edmondson: I had to deal with some problems that I'd set up. Brilliant. Because I thought, well, she hasn't addressed them. She should have set up. I know, yeah. Exactly.

14:15Fearne Cotton: That'll teach them. Exactly. I just want to pick up on what you said a minute ago, because I think, especially with reading and writing, but with many areas of life and work, we have these ideas about ourselves and assumptions. Other people think things about us. And like you just said there, you've got this underlying assumption that people think you're stupid or people think that you're not going to be able to do that written task.

14:39Mollie King: Yeah.

14:39Fearne Cotton: I would never have assumed that about you. I had no clue that you've ever thought like that or that that would be an insecurity. But I think most of us have that. I used to have one constantly, and sometimes I still can, but to a much less degree, where I would assume, sort of probably more in my 30s, people just think I'm like really weird. People think I'm odd and they don't quite get me and they just think I'm a bit of a weirdo. And it used to crumble my confidence to a point where I couldn't show up and just be me. And talk in a way that felt natural and relaxed. I would be acting like, what do they want me to be?

15:16Fearne Cotton: And then that fear will go. And I think it's a really tricky one to override. I think certainly with age and experience, you just go, oh, I can't be bothered to worry about what anyone thinks about anything. I'm just going to be me. And that's that. But I think when it's a fear that is actually like in this case, it's directly exposing, you're exposing that fear, that paranoia, and you're challenging it. That is a big deal and perhaps maybe even quite life changing for you in terms of how you move through the world with not having that insecurity there.

15:47Mollie King: Yeah, definitely. And I've definitely done that thing that you mentioned. I'm sorry, by the way, that you've felt like that as well. I think most of us have, haven't we? Yeah, definitely. And you do do that thing of sort of overcompensating because you want to sort of either prove a point or show that you're not the thing that you're worrying about. But it's definitely, I think, from school where I felt like, oh, I can't read these words. And you know where they would go around the class and it'd be like, right, we're going to take it in turn to each read the next paragraph. I remember sitting there I remember it so clearly in year four so I think I was about eight and I would count how many people I had until it was my turn to read my paragraph and I wasn't listening to a single word anyone was reading I was just going okay seven okay one two three and I would practice and practice and practice my paragraph and I was always sat next to my friend Charlotte and I remember always saying to her Charlotte what does that word say for any big word because the fear of sort of that exposure of yeah Molly's just read the words in the wrong order humiliated essentially it was awful and it's something that I found really hard to shake off and like Matt's been amazing on the radio at first I was very worried of like oh I hope I read these texts out okay I hope I don't read the words in the wrong order and actually you've told me so many times doesn't matter even if you do it doesn't people aren't sitting here judging you but I'm sort of judging myself and I want it to be good.

17:11Mollie King: I want to put my best foot forward every time. But I think sometimes if I could just like relax and go like, it's okay, Molly. And it's okay. Even if you do make these mistakes, what's going to happen? And I think I have found a bit more strength since having my girls. There are parts of that where I have felt like I've got a lot more strength. And I'm like, do you know what? These are two amazing little girls and you're their mom. So you're you're a part of that but I think definitely in my 20s and in my early 30s especially I've I've always been really hard on myself with it yeah oh my god I think so many of us are we're

17:47Fearne Cotton: so hard on ourselves and we're constantly berating ourselves for making the tiniest slip up I mean yeah what you guys do you've just literally come from radio one from doing your show you're live on the radio every weekday it's an immense pressure I did it myself for six years I think I did the the daily show for and it does come at a cost you know it is extremely exhausting to not only have to think of things to say every single day but also that hyper vigilance of I mustn't mess up and especially the BBC you know that you're sort of carrying that that around with you it is it is a lot of pressure how do you cope with that I think

18:26Matt Edmondson: well just to to what you were saying a second ago as mole's best friend and we are like as close a close a friend as you could be yeah it's really hard watching her have that internal dialogue with herself and it was fascinating to me and and and sort of a bit of a sucker punch to the gut molded the comic relief challenge a couple years back for radio one and a thing you always like she always says to me is like what would what will people think about this i'm like well we don't know everyone's different some people might think this thing or that thing we have no way of knowing but there's like a little gremlin that lives in molly that is is a is like a an

19:12Fearne Cotton: inbuilt hater i've got i've got that gremlin yeah that's there and it's it's it's trying to put

19:18Matt Edmondson: at the worst spin on the most innocent thing at all times yeah oh if i say that someone might think that which might make them think that which means oh no i've upset them oh i i can't do it so you notice you sort of end up tying yourself in like almost self-censorship around stuff that no one would ever be upset by and the the time that i found the hardest was when you were doing the common relief challenge so mole cycled for five days straight 10 hours a day in horrendous weather and i was in luxury behind a little van just following on my luxury van is fantastic and um and i was sort of watching this physical breakdown going on but also this mental breakdown and what mole couldn't what she wasn't tapped into in the way that i was was the listener reaction which was people going we love molly we love this person we love everything about her personality we love everything that she's doing the way that she's being as vulnerable as she is about why she's doing the cycle ride after her father's death the way she's being uh so kind and so nice to everyone around her and there were moments where moll would sort of have to say i need five minutes and often it was just like for a cuddle just needed a hug but there was a time where you were we had to go in a toilet cubicle in a Costa coffee in a service station and take all the mics off and everything and you were just like I can't do it I can't do it what are people saying what people think and I'm like the world loves you and the only person I see at the moment who doesn't is you and that's really hard to see because I've never met anyone that doesn't like Molly King no in any room you go to the most likeable

21:08Mollie King: nicest you know I don't know about that. No, but you really did like hold my hand through that. I would never, ever have been able to do it without Matt's support. When I had those moments, which I did every day of that challenge of like, I can't, I can't do this anymore. It was this guy that was there like, you can do this. You can get back on the bike. This is how you're going to do it. And I say that, you know, as much training as you can do for those challenges, mentally it's so exhausting i think you know going into it that physically this is going to be really tough and i'll never have done anything like that but mentally my goodness it's so tough because you're on your own on the bike i was cycling 10 hours a day and the thoughts just go round and round in your head and you haven't really got anyone to sort of bounce ideas off or chat to really so yeah that day i think it was the thursday i think it was the second to last day I was like, no, I just need to talk to you.

22:06Mollie King: Can we just go into the toilet? I just need to take the mics off and just properly talk to you about, is everything okay? But yeah, it's...

22:13Matt Edmondson: It's hard to watch. And actually, just to go back to your question about the radio, I am now almost too relaxed on the radio, I think. I'm so chilled. But when I started, I wasn't. And that came from a deep insecurity of like, I've been thrust into this job that I really want to be good at, but I don't think I am very good at. And any mistake would live with me for weeks. I'd literally wake up two weeks later being like, oh, I did that thing. Or if you said something and someone messaged and said, oh, play a song, mate, or that wasn't funny. You'd be like, if there was any part of me that felt, oh, that wasn't funny, I didn't do good enough, I was like, oh, they've seen me.

22:52Fearne Cotton: Yeah.

22:52Mollie King: That imposter syndrome. Yeah, they know I'm an imposter. Exactly.

22:56Matt Edmondson: It's only through doing it for ages that that eventually goes. And what was fascinating is when Mole arrived, it took that away from me completely because suddenly I was sharing the burden of the show. And I was a fan of what I was hearing from from Molly's side. So I was like, oh, I suddenly I like I objectively can like our show because it isn't all on me. But then I was also seeing someone basically going through that same journey that I've been through. That's a hard initiation. And wanting to be like, honestly, you're doing a billion times better than I was at the start. And you're so good at it.

23:35Matt Edmondson: But it just takes a while, doesn't it, to believe that.

23:38Fearne Cotton: Yeah, completely. And I think going back to what you said about not liking yourself. So in that moment, you've got the whole country going, we love you, Molly. You're amazing. If you still don't feel it, none of that touches the sides. It just falls on deaf ears. You don't hear it. where are you at today with liking yourself?

23:57Mollie King: I think I'm in a much better place definitely and I do think it is down to having my children like I just absolutely adore them and I think I'm probably kinder to myself since having them because I can see the wins that we have as a family and I can recognize gosh you know that's because you know we've taught Annabella to do that We've taught her to say please and thank you and sweet things. We've taught her to look after her sister and to give her a cuddle if she's crying. And I can recognise those things. So I feel like I'm in a much better place. I mean, still, you know, I question things all the time, don't I?

24:36Mollie King: But I do feel like I'm a lot better than I was a few years ago, definitely. Do you like yourself, Matt?

24:41Matt Edmondson: I do. I do. And I think that it's come off the back of Mole joining the show, me feeling comfortable. You know, I basically got a best friend delivered to me at a time in life where I didn't think I was going to collect any more friends. You know, I thought, oh, I've got like everything I need. And then Moll showed up. I do feel really content with who I am. And actually, my panic when I started Radio 1 was it was a slightly different culture at the time I started.

25:13Fearne Cotton: No shit, man.

25:16Matt Edmondson: There was a different culture back then. and I found it incredibly hard to be, I don't think I knew who I was, and I was sort of told, like, oh, you have to be really cool, and I'm just, and this will come as a surprise to both of you. Hold on, we're sitting down. I'm just not that cool, guys.

25:38Mollie King: What?

25:39Matt Edmondson: I'm not that cool.

25:40Fearne Cotton: But you are, in your way. In my own way. I would say you are what is factually known as cool. There's the cool where it's like, you're cool, you're a bit distant, you hang out with cool people. That to me is naff. I'm so over it. I never felt cool. I would be at Radio 1 and be like, God, I would go out and go to gigs and stuff, but I wasn't in the cool gang. And they would look at me like I was a piece of shit. You know, I never felt cool. I don't think anyone, if you feel cool, I think you're probably not.

26:08Matt Edmondson: I don't know. I think there are exceptions to that rule. I think there are people who are cool, effortlessly cool. Harry Styles. Harry Styles. Yeah, he's cool. He must know he's cool, mustn't he? I would say that Grimmie is incredibly cool and the nicest man in the world. Yeah, he is very lovely. And I don't think he walks around thinking he's cool, but he is. I don't know how to identify what it is, but he is.

26:27Fearne Cotton: I know, it's just a nebulous thing. What is it?

26:31Matt Edmondson: I actually think it's a sense of self-love. It's a sense of feeling comfortable in your own skin. And I definitely wasn't. And actually, the first person I have to thank for slightly getting to the real me was Chris Stark because he basically saw who I was. And then whenever I do anything with Scott and him, he would sort of play up to those elements of my character. And I realised, oh, these aren't bad things. These are the things that are unique to me. Yeah, they make you you. That sort of set me apart. And then when Mole joined the show, I felt such sort of peace with who I was because I felt like, oh, Molly likes me.

27:20Matt Edmondson: And so that and that relationship is what people are listening to.

27:24Fearne Cotton: Yeah. That's the best. That's who we should be hanging out with people, like a small group in life. Yeah. People that make you feel seen in a non-cheesy way, like, oh, they get exactly who I am. Totally. I don't have to cover it, pretend I'm anything other than exactly as I am. And those people make you feel so good. Not only should we work with people like that, we don't always get the choice, but be around people that make you feel exactly like that. Like, oh, I can just, I actually, I find it a very visceral experience. If I'm with people and I think, oh, I'm not safe to be myself here. They don't get me.

27:59Fearne Cotton: I feel physically tense and sort of panicky. I can't bear that feeling. And then equally when you're around people where you're like, I can just be me. It is so comforting. It's the best. So I'm, you know, no surprise that your show is so popular because that is what people are experiencing and listening is two people who adore each other, who are very happy in their skin with each other. Like that's such a lovely thing to hear. Now, today's episode is brought to you by The White Company. I have to say, I always find that when spring rolls around, something shifts, the light changes, the mornings feel a little softer.

28:37Fearne Cotton: that smell of spring outside oh my gosh and I start craving a bit of a reset especially in my home. It's like a spring clean but for your own rituals and routine isn't it? Thinking about how you're winding down in the evening, how you're actually sleeping, whether your bedroom feels like the gorgeous sanctuary it should be, that is where the white company comes in. There's such a trusted authority when it comes to sleep and wellness. From beautifully soft bed linen to breathable nightwear and calming fragrances, all designed to help you slow down, restore balance and create your own peaceful space at home.

29:20Fearne Cotton: So with that in mind, I thought I'd share a few of my own rituals and small seasonal swaps that I like to make at home to feel refreshed and reset for spring because I am very excited about making all of this happen over the next few weeks. My bedroom is definitely the first place I start. I think the easiest thing to do or certainly for me the most fun is just to have a clear out and that means a good rifle around my wardrobe to work out which things I've not worn for a while and what could definitely go to the old charity shop. I swap my big clumpy winter duvet out for a thinner one and sometimes treat myself to some new linen along the way as well.

30:00Fearne Cotton: And if you listen to me yabbering on often, you'll know that sleep isn't always the easiest for me. I go through fits and starts of sleeping well. But in the spring, as the evenings get lighter, I try and definitely get outside more in the daytime to give myself that natural serotonin boost that helps the production of melatonin. I think I know what I'm talking about here guys. And I like to try and wind down by just reading in bed. I get really, really sleepy long before I need to go to sleep. Light some candles, have the windows open to let some fresh air in and really get myself in the most relaxed physical and mental space before I hopefully have a good night's sleep.

30:45Fearne Cotton: Also as the seasons change and it's lighter at night, I have to have a blackout mask and a blackout blind. They are two absolute necessities. A sleep mask. There's no way I could even contemplate sleeping without an eye mask on. Eye mask, earplugs all the way. So I've been having a little look at the white company's range and there are so many lovely bits that I want immediately to make my bedroom feel all fresh and delicious so I can do my best to get a good night's sleep. If I have a work day where I get home in the afternoon, rare but delicious, I absolutely want to be changing into my PJs and certainly by the evening it's really important that I'm wearing something soft but breathable.

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36:36Fearne Cotton: I'm really interested to know, Molly, especially coming from a music background. But now you're in, you know, another weird job where you're yourself. That's quite a unique thing where as a presenter, a DJ, you are a version of yourself and you need that version to be palatable, especially with a big audience like a Radio One audience. Yeah. And some of this maybe plays into my own feelings or backstory, but there's moments or perhaps a sort of blanket coverage feeling of I need to be the good girl. I need to be good. I mustn't put a foot wrong. I must behave impeccably. I must be polite. I must always smile.

37:14Fearne Cotton: I must do the right thing. I must never kick up a fuss and say, I don't like that. I must just stay in line. And I was caged in that, I think, for quite a long time. Sometimes I broke free of that when I really couldn't deal with it. And these days, much less so. If I'm not happy with something or something's irking me, I need to get it out. I need to say it. And sometimes that's not met with the most pleasing reviews because people want shit to get done and get done quickly and easily. How much do you think that still runs the show for you?

37:48Mollie King: Gosh, really good question. I think when I'm going into a new environment, like when I joined Radio One, I mean, I was so determined. I was so driven. I wanted to work at Radio One. And Fern, And this is going to creep you out. And I really hope it doesn't change your opinion of me.

38:05Matt Edmondson: Oh, I know where this is going.

38:07Mollie King: But I actually made a vision board. I'd just come off Strictly and I was like, okay, I've had the best time ever on Strictly. But what am I going to do now? What am I going to do? And the one thing I knew I wanted to do was to work at Radio 1 and I wanted to have a show exactly like yours. I had a picture of you at Radio 1 on my vision board, which I later showed you. I am honoured.

38:31Fearne Cotton: I am honoured. If you actually know what hot mess I was back then, you'd be like, get her off the board. Get her off.

38:37Mollie King: You were there front and centre. But I loved your show. I spent so long listening to your show and just admiring how you spoke about bands and your passion for music. And I was really, really, after sort of coming out of the Saturdays and finishing Strictly, I was absolutely, like, my heart was set on working at Radio 1. and I think in those first few years I felt very much like it's the classic it's an imposter I'm not meant to be here I'm not a trained presenter people know I'm from a pop band I mean no one's

39:13Fearne Cotton: a trained presenter may I add like literally none of us have ever been trained I don't know what

39:17Mollie King: we're doing I was very much like if I step out of line or if I do the wrong thing or I say the wrong thing they're gonna see me straight away they're gonna get rid of me and again Matt you taught me so much in like the mistakes are what makes it funny. That's what people like. It's what makes it live. So I've had quite a fair few of those. But I think that I am somebody who's always wanting to please and always do the right thing and be polite and be kind. But I think that in the last few years, I have found a bit of that confidence to be able to say like, no actually I don't think that's right um oh what about this idea let's execute an interview this way because I I have so many ideas but a lot of the time I'm thinking or I'll just sit here and kind of go with the people who are higher up in the chain but I mean would you agree in that I feel like I'm a lot more outspoken with things like that yeah I think you are it's what's

40:17Matt Edmondson: interesting and I don't know if it's if it's uh because I'm a man and you're a woman or if it's because I've been there longer there is sometimes this sort of uh sense that oh I'm in charge and Molly's there yeah and it couldn't be further from the truth you know the thing that I found um like one of the things I found incredibly compelling about Molly when she joined the show was that her hunger to learn the job and be a DJ was more than I'd ever seen in anyone yeah and And you know what it's like. It's like learning to fly a plane and running the desks there. And it can take people a very long time.

40:56Matt Edmondson: It took me a really long time to get used to it. And Mole just went and she was like, I need to know. And she's like, what does that button do? And why would that work like that? And how do I add? I just saw you add reverb to that thing. How would you do that? And stuff that took me years to figure out. But just a real sense of like, I want to know how to do what you're doing and got good at it very fast. So everything on our show is 50-50. And I think we're the only presenting duo I know of that wants the other one to do the work. You know how people are always like, let me have the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

41:27Matt Edmondson: We're always like, you're going to do the desk today? Yeah, okay, come on. You're telling me to do the desk, right? Yeah. Neither of us want the hard bit, which is genuinely not the case. I see it in other shows. People are always like, I want the control. Oh, God, no thanks. It's like, please, you take the control. And I think that the problem is because you've come from another world, from a sort of successful pop career into radio, you're carrying this thing of like, they think that I don't belong here.

41:55Mollie King: Yeah, yeah.

41:56Matt Edmondson: And we're, I mean, we're so, you know, you've been doing radio longer than you're in the band now. So you're so far past that point. But I think there's still that thing of like, oh, well, she's the, she's the sort of newer one. So, you know, she's not she's not going to worry about all of this, the technical stuff or anything like that. And she's more on it than most presenters.

42:16Fearne Cotton: I love disproving people like that. I even had it. You know, I've been at work events and I've had two men stood by me talking about business and completely excluded me from the conversation. It's like, oh, I run a business. Yeah. Yeah. Over here. Hello. But it's like, no, not even going to engage in that conversation. I get royally fucked off these days I think I'd be much more vocal now but I probably sort of care a little bit less about ruffling feathers whereas before I was terrified to do so and I think the nature of our industry is based on fear that you're going to lose the job it's like there's always someone who can take your job if you're not grateful enough and you don't do it brilliantly and I think that's a lot of our industry thrives on that and I mean it's intolerable to sort of sit in that and act from that place of fear rather than no I deserve to be here yeah I absolutely deserve to be here and I think your career trajectory is so brilliant for people to see that you can change your mind you can do something different and everybody should be allowed to do that no matter what you're doing what line of work there should be room or a moment to pivot and say yeah okay I'm going to go from a different direction and see I mean that's certainly what I I've done and I obviously have been through all the layers of imposter syndrome and paranoia.

43:35Fearne Cotton: And then I think you get to a place where you go, no, I fucking deserve to be here. Thanks very much. Yeah. And this is my rightful place and I will act accordingly.

43:43Mollie King: Definitely. The amount of times that I like want to scream in my head, it's 2026 people. Yes. You know, come on. Yes. But it's bizarre because sometimes there are still circumstances, like we said, where these things happen. I think say it out loud. Do you? Yep. Oh God, Fern.

43:59Fearne Cotton: As a test to yourself, because it doesn't ever have to be with aggression. Like, I'm a fucking whatever. It's just like, do you know what? Honestly, because it's a good test for you. And I'm saying this for myself as much as I am for you. To say it and know that the world's still turning afterwards. Especially in the world of radio. When I joined Radio 1, I don't even know what year that was. I was probably 24 ,000 years ago. And it was a very male-dominated industry in every sense. From the top of the hierarchy down to the DJs. DJs. And, you know, at one point I was the only female on daytime.

44:32Fearne Cotton: You know, it was a real male orientated world. So I think although there have been some brilliant positive changes in that workplace and in that genre of media, I think, you know, there's still so many things that need to be addressed and looked at and change for the better. So let's go back to the podcast because you're writing this book together. Is the dream to have this book published at the end?

44:55Matt Edmondson: Well, Well, listen, anyone can publish a book these days, even if it's just one copy.

44:58Fearne Cotton: Yes. Just for us.

44:59Matt Edmondson: Well, actually, two copies. I'll have one. Three. Yeah, three copies. There you go. I mean, I don't know how readable it is as a book.

45:08Mollie King: Excuse me, I've spent a bit of weeks doing this.

45:12Matt Edmondson: I think it's best digested as the podcast. Okay. Because we're sort of doing live footnotes on it. Yeah. And also because 50 % of it I haven't heard, and same for Mole, we're kind of having to digest it at the same time as our listeners will be um and and i think that i think you get more from the interrogation of the chapters uh along the way than if you were

45:38Mollie King: just to read it cold i don't think it would make sense reading it i think i think yeah that's i think if you printed out what was there yeah people would go this sounds like it was written

45:48Matt Edmondson: by two people who've never discussed any of this or read a book before and they would be right so I would say

45:55Mollie King: hold on I've read Fox's socks alright yeah yeah

45:57Matt Edmondson: so have I actually it's pretty gripping what a cracker

46:00Fearne Cotton: hand spot well I think it's just a genius idea and I urge people to listen to it I was lolling my head off listening thank you thank you so much

46:08Matt Edmondson: we laughed so much making it there is a as it as it progresses there's a moment where Mole sort of really writes me into a corner and it took me about three days to figure out how to kind of re-engineer the Rubik's Cube and go right okay I can make this make sense now but from it came the best bit of audio I've ever heard which is Molly at the same time as a character realising this revelation

46:36Mollie King: it's a big revelation

46:37Matt Edmondson: quite a big revelation and you hear it's the most human emotion set of emotions I've ever heard you hear the penny drop you hear the penny drop and then Molly's got the greatest laugh ever

46:50Mollie King: but you hear

46:51Matt Edmondson: I'm going to say it's about 45 seconds of solid, like, can't breathe laughter as you realise what's happened. It's the most I've ever laughed.

46:59Fearne Cotton: How brilliant.

47:00Matt Edmondson: It is such a joy.

47:01Fearne Cotton: One thing we all need is more laughter in this world. There is no better feeling and it's so good for you in every way. So even if it's not getting to do what you guys do for work, listening to this podcast, having a good old belly laugh on the way to work or out on a walk, that's what we all really need at the moment. We can guarantee that. or your money back. You don't have to pay for it. Exactly. So basically nothing back. Now, this is a tricky question for two radio DJs, but we are making a Happy Place playlist and we want to put songs on that just make you feel great. It doesn't have to be an upbeat, dancey song, but just something that makes you feel bloody happy.

47:38Matt Edmondson: Yeah.

47:38Fearne Cotton: It's quite a tricky one to just say one song, but anything floating around? I know the answer.

47:42Matt Edmondson: Go on then, hit me. It's the Saturday's Megamix.

47:45Fearne Cotton: Yes! I'm going to say it!

47:46Matt Edmondson: Have you heard it?

47:47Fearne Cotton: No, but it's going on there. It's seven minutes and it's all the hits

47:50Matt Edmondson: back to back. I don't know who mixed it but they're genius it's so good wow it's so good and we've been

47:55Mollie King: if you're lucky Fern I can teach you the routine as well I mean yes I

47:59Matt Edmondson: as you know I don't like to leave my house or go out anywhere no same but there have been times where under duress I've been in a club and have you asked for it no it's been on it's been on when Mo and I have been together it's been on it's because I've asked for it

48:12Mollie King: it's like

48:13Matt Edmondson: on the phone she's holding a flashing phone to the DJ

48:17Mollie King: it's me it's me me oh my god so good

48:19Matt Edmondson: and we're once in a club with actually we were there with a lot of the cool people from Radio 1

48:23Mollie King: I don't know how we ended up there but we were there

48:27Matt Edmondson: and I was feeling very much like I need to leave this place pretty soon and they played the Saturdays Megamix and for a split second or for seven minutes Molly was the coolest person at the epicenter that is amazing of the network okay that's going on there

48:41Fearne Cotton: that's a unique song or Megamix we've not put on there yet great get it on there what are you saying

48:46Mollie King: I'm going to go for Timber Pitbull Kesha because it doesn't get better than that. From the start, do the noise.

48:54Fearne Cotton: Very good. You know you're in for a good time. Yeah, if that comes on at a wedding, it's guaranteed it's a floor filler. Floor filler. Everyone's there busting. It's impossible to sit still. That's a very good entry. Okay, that's also going on. And respectively, where is your happy place?

49:09Matt Edmondson: My happy place is in doing a creative project. And we spoke about it the last time I was on. My happy place is finding something that gets me into a flow state where the world melts away and it's just me and whatever thing I'm tinkering on and I can be there for hours and I can forget to eat and I can come out the other side of it and have made a thing and if you ask me to go and try and do that thing again I could I could explain how it was done that is like my paradise so as often as I can achieve a kind of flow state and that can be making like a doing the podcast or it can be sometimes just like doing Play-Doh with the kids I'm just like I'm locked in I'm making a little box I'm completely locked into this thing

49:54Mollie King: Five hours later the Titanic got Play-Doh That's so good That would be this guy It really would How about you Molly? Mine would be probably in the garden like wellies on Are you in your gardening era? Oh no but that's my dream Yeah I'm not there yet But I'm so interested She's in her watching someone else in the gardening era

50:12Fearne Cotton: Okay nice so good watching Stuart get your wellies on mate

50:17Mollie King: get the shovel out is Stuart into no neither of us are which is quite annoying but I'm hoping in a few years time we'll find that within ourselves I think it's going to naturally occur I really want an allotment me too although we've got a very small garden you don't and everyone's telling me it's impossible but being in the garden wellies on running around with the girls just getting stuck and I love being outdoors Just the wellies? That's quite a scene. Do I need to wear more than that? God, I should change my plans. Poor neighbours. But yeah, just being out in the outside with the girls, like just getting stuck in or out like in puddles or whatever.

50:56Mollie King: But yeah, just being outside.

50:58Matt Edmondson: I think I've done more gardening in your garden than you have. Have you? Yeah, the last time I came round, I cleaned your garden table. Did you? Yeah.

51:07Mollie King: Just because? Well, you invited yourself round, which is great. Yeah. And then you sort of took over the place, which is very you. You sat on the couch, feet up, laptop out.

51:16Matt Edmondson: I think you were like, oh, there's this table. You were like, you can't sit on the outside table. It's got like some rust or something on it.

51:21Mollie King: I was like, I can solve that out. And you did actually. Fancy coming over next week.

51:26Matt Edmondson: I buffed that table up real good. And then we went over our next door neighbour's house, Barry. He was away and we used his trampoline.

51:33Mollie King: He's always asking now to go on Barry's trampoline.

51:36Matt Edmondson: Barry's trampoline.

51:37Mollie King: Does Barry know? Does Barry know? I don't think so.

51:40Matt Edmondson: Yeah, just hopped over the fence. Oh, man. Barry was out of the country for like a month.

51:43Mollie King: Barry was out. Barry has no clue. Barry's listening. Sorry, Barry.

51:47Matt Edmondson: Sorry, Barry. It's a great trampoline, Barry. It's unbelievable.

51:51Fearne Cotton: I mean, not the ending I was expecting, but Matt and Molly, what an absolute joy. Best of luck with Novel Idea. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you for having us. I've loved seeing you. Thank you. It's been a joy. Do you know what? I needed that. I needed a bloody good old laugh. It was just so brilliant talking to those two. They are genuinely the most lovely mates who properly adore each other and really have each other's back. I just love them and I love that talk. Their podcast, Novel Idea, is available to listen to now. If you need more belly laughter, head there. Now, you're definitely going to want to make sure you're back here next week because I've got something super fun for you.

52:33Fearne Cotton: Not one, not two, but three brilliant women are going to be with me to chat about what it feels like trying to be likeable all the time and what it feels like when you're not liked. In the meantime, I'll be dropping into your podcast feed later this week with some more of my own little thoughts about life, what's making me happy and not, and the rest of the Happy Place team. until next time a huge thank you again to Matt and Molly to the producer Anushka Tate at Happy Play Studios and to you I bloody love ya

53:53Matt Edmondson: We'll see you next time. now. Sweat is pouring and so are the installs. Spread the word about your business with podcast ads on Acast. Start today at go.acast.com slash advertise.