Friday Q&A on Ask Us Anything: Skiing with Kids, Spring Fashion & Friendships

0:02Zoe Plummer: Zoe and Georgia will be here in just a moment. Once you've finished this episode, check out the latest installment of Get A Grip for some great empowering female vibes. They've got an International Women's Day special packed with bold, brilliant female energy. They're celebrating the women driving the conversation forward, getting stuck into Rihanna's long awaited comeback to music and chatting about the USA women's hockey team. search for Get A Grip wherever you listen and tee it up to play next

0:36Zoe Plummer: Parents, if you've ever experienced bedtime battles with the kids I'm going to let you into a little secret I'm Abby, a mother of two and I had these battles myself endless excuses, delay tactics and many tears and tantrums but I've created a solution the perfect kids podcast that makes bedtime a dream It's called Koala Moon and it's hosted by me, Abby. With over 300 episodes, packed with original stories and sleep meditations, Koala Moon makes bedtimes easy and enjoyable. Episodes start out engaging and really rather magical, but as they progress, they gently slow to a calm and relaxing pace to have your little ones out like a light.

1:22Zoe Plummer: Since launching in 2022, Koala Moon has helped with over 20 million nights sleep and received over 6 ,000 five-star reviews. Win back your evenings. Listen to Koala Moon now, wherever you get your podcasts.

1:39Zoe Plummer: Hello and welcome to Made by Mamas, the podcast. I'm Zoe Hardman. And I'm Georgia Dayton. And this is your parenting safe space where no conversation is off limits. With five kids between G and I, we have seen a lot.

1:53Georgia Dayton: We really have. Each week, we'll be joined by some famous faces and experts, and we'll chat about the brands and products that have saved us along the way. In short, we're the parenting podcast for you. Before we get started, hit subscribe or follow

2:05Zoe Plummer: so you're the first to know when each episode lands. And they're on Tuesdays and Fridays.

2:10Georgia Dayton: And it really helps if you leave a rating and a review. You can also find us on Instagram. We're on at Made by Mummers. But for now, George, should we get into it?

2:18Zoe Plummer: oh another week down and the week after half term do you reckon there's a lot of people that were literally booting their kids back into school at the beginning of the week yeah it's weird isn't

2:28Georgia Dayton: it because our kids are getting older and it doesn't feel so physically demanding having them off for half term or you know off for the weekend or whatever like it did when they were at nursery and preschool unless you go skiing with them yeah I was just gonna say that but I did find myself of like on Sunday night being like, why do I feel so like drained? And it was because I hadn't had a break. Like being on holiday when you're on holiday laying down and maybe they go off to kids club or, you know, go off swimming or off doing whatever is very different to when you go skiing or go to Disneyland or go on a city break or even just have them at home all half term.

3:09Georgia Dayton: Like it's actually constant.

3:11Zoe Plummer: Just you understand actually when you're saying it, I'm so tired. Yeah, no, that's exactly right. And like you said, George, I think when your kids are little, there really isn't a respite. At least, you know, our kids are at the age where if we want to give them the iPads for a couple of hours, we can just go and sit down and just be like, oh my good Lord. And I think like an activity like skiing, how privileged and lucky, that's not me moaning. Oh no, of course not. All of the admin that goes with it. And actually this leads us in, we're doing a Q &A today. we thought let's do an ask us anything because it's been a while since we caught up with you guys the first question that I've seen is tips on skiing with kids I've skied all of my life but never taken my six and three-year-olds want to but it is daunting I totally totally totally get that um I actually really want to help this person because um I think skiing is one of those things that we probably sacrifice when we have our kids because there's probably going to be a period of five years where you just can't do it because you're never going to take a baby to a ski resort are you we got the kids in to get to into skiing when they were three and four that's when we first took them but jesus christ we're only just seeing the benefits now and this was our uh fifth trip wow so because now they can come on all the runs with us but you spend the first couple of years just being like holy fuck they're either going to die someone's going to crash into them they're going to break something they're moaning and crying constantly gloves are falling off they've lost their ski pass you know the helmet doesn't fit properly they need a poo you're just like i can't do this yeah but stick with it now you see the reward really really organized pick a ski resort that's ski in ski out because that's easy if you've got kids who've done it before otherwise make it as easy as possible with the location of the ski school get them into ski school straight away and don't feel guilty about booking them into ski school no all day yeah

5:00Georgia Dayton: I was just going to say, I've only been skiing once with the kids and we did one of those club med holidays. Honestly, all of the stuff that people said about skiing, we didn't experience. Like we literally didn't. I mean, I had no idea. So I had to do that. Like I had no idea about going to collect your skis and doing all that. So it was like skiing for dummies. Like it really was. We turned up to the hotel and they go, okay, go downstairs. And then all of our stuff was in the locker already for us. There was no like...

5:31Zoe Plummer: Jesus wept woman. I've never had that. Yeah.

5:34Georgia Dayton: And the shop was in the basement of the hotel. And all we had to do is try the boots on. That was it. And then they put them in the locker for you. And then in the morning, we literally took the kids down to ski school in their thermals. And all of their ski stuff, we put it all down there the night before. They got them into their suits. They took them out onto the snow. We didn't have any... They got them into their suits? Yeah. These people are angels. Yeah, everything. So Club Med would be a good one if you wanted. I think, yeah, and I'm sure maybe there are other, you know, similar things.

6:08Georgia Dayton: But I really, like, I have my hand held by that Sarah from Flagstone, her name is. And she really did actually take me through it all. This person sounds like they know what they're doing a bit more than I did. Yeah. But I do think if you're put off by all of that stuff, there are options. It is expensive. It really is.

6:29Zoe Plummer: Yeah, it is expensive, but you can do it. So we have figured it out now that we drive, which saves about three grand on the flights. Wow. It takes 12 hours. We stay overnight about two hours south of Dijon. So we drive down there, stay overnight. Then we boot up to the resort on the Saturday morning. So we get into resort at like 10.30.

6:48Georgia Dayton: And then do you go straight out? No, you don't ski on the Saturday.

6:50Zoe Plummer: We start on the Sunday. So that's kind of what we sacrifice for the cost of the savings. Yeah, of course. also a great tip is not to be in a resort of aureas we ski in but there are no cars in a so you have to traipse around in snow with young children carrying equipment do not do that stay in a resort where you can get around easier and have easy access to the esf or i don't know if you want to do evolution whatever you know the different ski schools just make sure everything is in close vicinity because that's when it starts to get really stressful i'm going to create a reel i've said it now on exactly what we took and things tips and bits and pieces to make it easier yeah

7:28Georgia Dayton: because it is like you obviously grew up skiing and i think when you talk to people who did grow up skiing they're just like oh you know it almost seems like they just do it but there is so much to it which i learned oh my god having not grown up doing it um it's a good holiday though and they

7:43Zoe Plummer: and they definitely the pros outweigh the cons and everyone's like we don't want to be seen like

7:48Georgia Dayton: we're not moaning about stuff like that no because it is always worth it yeah of course it totally um could you recommend a good concealer for dark circles for 40 plus so hard to find George oh god I feel like a worn out record the Bobby Brown duo so it's like Bobby Brown um correct to stick I think that is the key like it you concealer doesn't work in the same way that it did pre-kids even I'm not even saying like pre-40 pre it doesn't work in the same way you need the base first um and then the bobby brown again like it's a foundation concealer it's amazing

8:25Zoe Plummer: um i that's for me that's the one is the corrector slightly orangey yeah it's a different color it

8:32Georgia Dayton: has different tones to take out the blue or whatever color and then you go lighter then

8:37Zoe Plummer: you go lighter yeah okay i love that um and i sound like a broken record as well what's my custard?

8:44Georgia Dayton: NARS custard yeah NARS custard

8:47Zoe Plummer: I absolutely love it it's brilliant it doesn't go cakey there's nothing worse than cakey that whole like baking thing that influencers used to be doing that doesn't work 40 plus I'm sorry we've got too many lines life experience lines

8:59Georgia Dayton: there's that Rodeal banana under eye concealer I use that sometimes on a like if I'm going on a night out which I don't do but if I did sometimes you're not looking photos like in real life it looks nice and I look on photos and I'm like It's like I've got white under my eye.

9:13Zoe Plummer: The first year that I ever went to the Brits was like a massive thing for me. I got ready. Me and Lydia Bright had the same manager. I got ready at her house and she obviously had that giant pig living in her kitchen at the time, do you remember? And I remember having my makeup done by somebody and we were in a bit of a rush. We had to get to the O2 and it was like my – anyway, stepped onto the carpet. I was wearing the most hideous dress you've ever seen. My hair, I had one of those – do you remember like 15? 16 years ago you used to put those donuts in your hair underneath and do like a top like a chignon but on the top of your head and then I had this white cake and it was the light something about the flashing I mean I looked like I could have been on RuPaul's Drag Race

10:00Georgia Dayton: or like you've been skiing with goggles on

10:03Zoe Plummer: fucking hell just be careful check in the natural light before you get out

10:06Georgia Dayton: yeah definitely

10:07Zoe Plummer: where are G's sunglasses from in the Paris pics I love them that's from Ellie

10:11Georgia Dayton: Oh, Lispex. Oh, Lispex. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think that's such a good brand because it's like mid-price point. They're good quality. I like Lispex for like a different look.

10:22Zoe Plummer: They sound like they might be prescription. No. No.

10:27Georgia Dayton: They're not.

10:28Zoe Plummer: Lispex. Lispex. Lispex.

10:30Georgia Dayton: I got them on Harvey Nichols' website, but they do them.

10:33Zoe Plummer: What sort of price point?

10:34Georgia Dayton: 60 to 80. Oh, brilliant. Yeah, so not like. Never heard of them. Yeah, they just do different shapes. You know when you want a good quality pair, so you don't want to buy maybe like a high street pair, but you want something a bit different.

10:47Zoe Plummer: Love. You looked gorgeous.

10:48Georgia Dayton: Thanks. Do you shower in the morning or evening? Constant debate in our house.

10:53Zoe Plummer: When's everyone going to get a jump? That's a horrible way of saying it, isn't it? Make love. That really is. Sorry. That's also weird.

11:01Georgia Dayton: When's everyone going to get a jump?

11:03Zoe Plummer: Because it's definitely in the morning, the showering.

11:06Georgia Dayton: Yeah.

11:07Zoe Plummer: Unless I go to the gym. I don't shower before the gym.

11:09Georgia Dayton: I was going to say, it really depends what I'm doing. I have a bath every evening.

11:15Zoe Plummer: You're like Elizabeth's...

11:16Georgia Dayton: Even if it's for five minutes.

11:17Zoe Plummer: Who's the old lady that's... Elizabeth Taylor. You're like Elizabeth Taylor, aren't you? You have a bath every night.

11:23Georgia Dayton: Every evening, yeah. It helps my sleep score.

11:26Zoe Plummer: Yeah, you do need to relax, so it's probably the way you unwind.

11:28Georgia Dayton: It really is. So I don't shower in the evening, but I would shower in the morning. Have you had a shower today?

11:34Zoe Plummer: Yeah. So you have a shower in the morning and a bath in the evening? Yeah.

11:38Georgia Dayton: Who does that? Or like today, because we've been in London and on the train and stuff, I'll have a shower when I get home before I put pyjamas on. Because I don't want to be dirty putting pyjamas on.

11:48Zoe Plummer: And then when's your bath?

11:50Georgia Dayton: Maybe I won't have one.

11:51Zoe Plummer: Because that would be extreme.

11:52Georgia Dayton: Because that would be extreme.

11:54Zoe Plummer: Your skin, I'm not sure you should be.

11:55Georgia Dayton: Yeah, no, that would be dehydrating. But I sort of think it depends. Yeah, because if you're getting up and going to the gym in the morning, I would definitely not shower in the morning.

12:05Zoe Plummer: No.

12:05Georgia Dayton: If I'm going into work or into the office or whatever, then yeah.

12:08Zoe Plummer: Sometimes, though, it's like four o 'clock in the afternoon. I've been to the gym.

12:11Georgia Dayton: Oh, yeah, I do.

12:12Zoe Plummer: I absolutely honk.

12:14Georgia Dayton: I definitely do that.

12:16Zoe Plummer: I'm like, what is that smell? Is it the dog? No, it's me. And then I'm like, right, I go out for a shower then. It just depends on what. Yeah, it depends on what. It depends.

12:24Georgia Dayton: And also in the summer, you probably shower in the morning because you've sweaty overnight. Sweated through the night.

12:29Zoe Plummer: Nothing upsets me more. You can do both if you want. When people do not shower and then go to bed. Yeah, when it's hot. Just, whoa. Just like, on what planet would you ever go to the gym, do your day at work, and then just get into my bed? I know. Dirty. Duzzer.

12:46Georgia Dayton: Oh, is that what he does?

12:48Zoe Plummer: Sometimes, do you know what I say to him as well? I say, because he always wants to have sex. I say to him, if you don't shower, there's no chance. If you do shower, there's a slight chance. And he gets straight up and goes in for a shower.

13:03Georgia Dayton: It's literally like getting good to brush teeth. And then I don't do it anyway. You don't do it anyway. Ha ha, sucker. asleep Zoe how's the less drinking going need inspiration to be more considered reboots so

13:19Zoe Plummer: when we went away skiing I had two half beers with a bit of lemonade in them and that's it

13:25Georgia Dayton: the whole trip

13:27Zoe Plummer: and like you know in a resort you're like yeah apres apres we didn't do any of that haven't had a drink since I've been back it's actually going really well I'm not really missing it, but I'm obviously not completely dry, but I have just massively sort of cut down on it and I wouldn't have a drink in the week now and stuff. So I am definitely feeling better. I think I've gone through that. I'm sleeping like the dead.

13:50Georgia Dayton: Yeah, it's good.

13:51Zoe Plummer: It's amazing. Yeah. So I think like inspiration, I would just maybe set in your mind, set yourself some targets and check in every day on those targets. Like I'm on an app and I just make my pledge every day that I will not drink today. and then it pings up going, oh, wow, you haven't drunk for two weeks. And I'm like, well, that's really nice inspiration. It's called I Am Sober, the app that I use. And then if I do drink for a day, then I also input that. But it just makes me more conscious.

14:18Georgia Dayton: Yeah. Yeah. I think sometimes you just got to break the habit, haven't you? Yeah. And then you can just pick and choose when you drink rather than it just being a natural thing to do. Correct.

14:29Zoe Plummer: Yeah. Correct. Spring fashion, please, George. Ooh. Can we talk about your hushed trousers?

14:35Georgia Dayton: Oh, yeah, I got some great. They're like, what do you call these? They're kind of like, well, no, not. Stiff satin. Stiff satin, not shiny joggers. They're leopard with a blue stripe down the side. Yeah, I just saw them on the, it's actually on an Instagram ad, like a Hush one that came up. And they do Hush on M &S.

14:57Zoe Plummer: I just put an Instagram story up with that, with them going, Hush, call us.

15:02Georgia Dayton: I do. I really like, yeah, I really like them. I'm loving Hush, actually. I really am at the moment. I started getting into their jeans last year, and then now I just keep buying stuff from them. But I'm really looking forward to spring fashion.

15:13Zoe Plummer: I can't wait. Yeah. We're not there yet, though. I've still got my Sherlyn coat on. It's really quite cold outside.

15:18Georgia Dayton: What are we going to be wearing in spring? I just feel like I'll be the same, like barrel leg jeans, not having to wear boots, just wearing loafers or trainers, T-shirts, little crop jackets.

15:30Zoe Plummer: Yeah, lots of butter yellow. That was everywhere. I saw lots of tulle. I think it's just going to be lovely to de-layer. We're coming into March, so in the next month or so, we'll do a spring fashion Q &A and focus on that.

15:41Georgia Dayton: Yeah, definitely. We can do some sort of outfit suggestions. Find not sending my daughter to nursery brings a lot of judgment. I was made redundant during mat leave, so don't need childcare. Debating nursery, my daughter is three.

15:56Zoe Plummer: I hate that she feels she gets judgment for that. What is wrong with people? I know. Everyone just back off and let everybody do what they want to do with their own child. I know. Really sorry that that person's experienced that.

16:09Georgia Dayton: 100%.

16:09Zoe Plummer: Flick the bird when they're not looking. Now, you know what? There are pros and cons to both. Of course. People that have to send their kids to nursery because they're working full time probably feel horrifically guilty and feel that they're being judged because their child is in nursery full time. Then you're getting judgment when you're keeping your children. You cannot win as a mother. there will always be somebody that has an opinion which is opposing to yours that they feel they can put onto you yeah and what georgia and i will both say to you because i think i can speak for georgia on this is that you have to do what works for you do not let anybody else's opinion impact or affect

16:43Georgia Dayton: you yeah when it comes to things like that yeah no definitely and also if you're sort of debating it doesn't have to be all yeah all in like i think you know people can worry that if they don't send their child to like a nursery setting then when they start school it's harder but preschools and stuff you can literally do like a morning a morning a week two mornings a week you can go and do stay and play sessions where you know they're just you're still there like I think there's no right

17:12Zoe Plummer: way also I think at three you qualify for either 15 or 33 hours depending on your income and both the kids went to preschool yeah and that was really lovely that was kind of play and a bit of learning but it wasn't, you know, it was just kind of interaction with other kids. But I'm sure your kid gets loads of interaction.

17:30Georgia Dayton: And it's up to you. That's the whole thing. I really wouldn't worry about the judgment.

17:35Zoe Plummer: Best affordable skincare for a soon-to-be 30-year-old?

17:39Georgia Dayton: Oh, I'm jealous. Me too. I just was about to say that. Do you know what? I actually, I wonder if I haven't got it with me, but I can remember what it is. I went into Boots the other day and I was looking at stuff from the Inkey List. I love the Inkey List. I think that is such a good, affordable skincare brand in general. I think it's one of those where you have to know what you're doing because there's lots of acids and actives and all of that. But there was an amazing hyaluronic acid mist. Nice. That's great as you approach 30 because that's when you start to really need more hydration. I would go with, yeah, go look at the inky list.

18:18Georgia Dayton: Keep it simple, like a nice cleanser. I don't think retinol yet. Approaching 30. I think look at like hydration. Yeah. And maybe vitamin C in the morning or something.

18:28Zoe Plummer: And really, really good SPF.

18:30Georgia Dayton: Yeah.

18:31Zoe Plummer: To be honest with you, I think you should start. I think in a way I sort of regret growing up in the 90s with that because we did not. We would bake ourselves in baby oil, face and body. Yeah, sunbeds. I remember falling asleep on the balcony in Portugal on a girls' trip when I was like 15. Can you believe I went away on a girls' trip when I was 15?

18:47Georgia Dayton: I think I did as well.

18:48Zoe Plummer: No parents? Yeah. Shit, the stuff we got up to was so fun. But anyway, when I was really hungover, having not slept one night, I fell asleep on the balcony with baby oil and my boobs out. And I woke up and I had blisters on my boobs.

19:01Georgia Dayton: I don't. It's awful. I used to get off the train, like in my school uniform, we're going to a sunbed shop.

19:06Zoe Plummer: Oh, my God. The sunbeds.

19:08Georgia Dayton: Right. I don't like David Dickinson's love child. Have you ever gone to a sunbed now? Not in a million years. Same. There are sunbed shops. Everywhere. Opening on the high street near me. Like, who's thinking to themselves, oh, I know what I'm going to do. Open a sunbed shop.

19:23Zoe Plummer: So I'm thinking that there's still a lot of – so where do we sit? I mean, obviously, I know where I sit on sunbeds, but are sunbeds more damaging?

19:31Georgia Dayton: Than the actual sun.

19:33Zoe Plummer: Than the actual sun. Oh, I think they are.

19:34Georgia Dayton: I think they're more intense.

19:35Zoe Plummer: Because they're much more intense, and that's the problem, correct? Are producers looking at it?

19:38Georgia Dayton: And also, in the actual sun, you wear SPF. On a sunbed, you don't. You can use, like, that tally lotion.

19:46Zoe Plummer: Like you'd come out and you would be so dark and you'd see what is like, um, like something that made you go. Tingle. Yeah. Quicker. And the tingle.

19:55Georgia Dayton: Australian gold. That's what it was.

19:58Zoe Plummer: We're laughing. That smell. I actually love that smell. I know me too. It makes me think of. It's lovely.

20:03Georgia Dayton: That smell.

20:04Zoe Plummer: Don't go on sunbeds.

20:05Georgia Dayton: Don't know.

20:06Zoe Plummer: Don't go on sunbeds, but do use an SPF because I think that's really important.

20:09Georgia Dayton: Any good ones.

20:10Zoe Plummer: I mean, I use La Roche-Posay, but it's not that affordable.

20:13Georgia Dayton: I think. Yeah. But it does last. The IL one that has got a bit of shimmer in. Yeah, nice. It's small white bottle. That's really good. I think that's pretty affordable. Beauty pie is really good as well. Yeah, that is good. Really, really good. There's like the amount of affordable skincare now is so, I mean, I don't spend loads on skincare anymore. Do you use the ordinary? I don't anymore, but I used to. Yeah. Why do you not anymore? Just because I've had to pull it all back, like because of my perioral dermatitis.

20:40Zoe Plummer: Oh, I would really like to mix up my makeup a little bit. Like, I feel like I've been wearing the same makeup for the last 10 years. I mean, me buying, like, that VB eyeliner when she was like, oh, I sell one every 30 seconds. I was like, well, I'm not going to buy one. And I was like, oh, but the colors are so nice. And it's really nice. Yeah.

20:57Georgia Dayton: We need to go and, like. Let's go for a hunt. Yeah. And go and try loads of new stuff. Let's do that. Okay. I'm up for it. We'll be right back after this short break.

21:34Zoe Plummer: We'll see you next week. Abby. With over 300 episodes packed with original stories and sleep meditations, Koala Moon makes bedtimes easy and enjoyable. Episodes start out engaging and really rather magical, but as they progress, they gently slow to a calm and relaxing pace to have your little ones out like a light. Since launching in 2022, Koala Moon has helped with over 20 million nights sleep and received over 6 ,000 five-star reviews. Win back your evenings. Listen to Koala Moon now wherever you get your podcasts.

22:15Zoe Plummer: Welcome back to this episode of Made by Mamas. Now, where were we?

22:19Georgia Dayton: Best holiday destinations for tweens and teens, please. i mean yeah i mean for me somewhere like in the middle of nowhere like a mall it's just no good for them yeah they don't they want to be around you know kids their own age they might want to

22:41Zoe Plummer: do activities they might not they want a bit of freedom they can mooch into the town yeah you know they can it's not like going out and getting shitted is it but they want to be able to just to step out with friends make connections so like I mean lots of the European destinations I think are incredible for that even something like you know we're going on we're hopefully fingers crossed going to do a Mark Warner we haven't booked it this year but that's great for all ages because they can roam around and do what they want but there's activities for the younger kids Isla can do some sailing you know all that sort of thing but I do think at that age you want to think about you know pure luxury in the middle of nowhere they're going to be bored yeah out of their face 100%.

23:19Georgia Dayton: I'd actually say I grew up going to Portugal and we would go to the same place like every Easter and summer in Val de Lobo. And that had a really good sort of balance between being really great for like my parents and adults because you have amazing restaurants, golf courses, all that stuff. But we had a real sense of freedom. Like we could go to the local nightclub. I mean, I was probably like 13 or 12 or something. I'm not saying you should do that but we did but it was fun and safe but then that XO that I went to in Turkey last year again like I don't know just for me I agree with you you can't go to somewhere in the middle of nowhere with a teen or a tween it's got to be somewhere that feels safe but they have like freedom yeah 100 % yeah I think Portugal's a really good shout I love Portugal

24:11Zoe Plummer: for that um like obviously we love spain as well so lots of places i think you've just got to think about having other families around you that have got kids the same age you know and i think isla sometimes struggles with that because every time we hang out with anybody their kids are like luna and kit's age and that's why we've got one particular family the barretts who are absolutely lovely and they've got an older boy who's exactly the same age as isla and she loves that so and i'm like going on holiday with families that have got kids the same age as well as always always a yeah it's always a good thing I think definitely lots of good options out there how to put my phone away I'm always on it in front of the kids and they're noticing but I'm completely addicted oh

24:50Georgia Dayton: my god I'm the same as this I think it's really difficult like depending like like if your work is on your phone it is so hard like both me and James like his emails and his everything he's on phone he's always on the calls or whatever he's always on the phone and I'm exactly the same but we now really try even if it's just an hour in the evening to not be on our phones so like our evenings are mental like we probably don't even have an hour um when the kids are at home before they go to bed any day but we really try like especially when they're going to bed or if they're going in you know they're getting ready for bed or in the morning we really try just to leave it it's easier said than done um but I think you have to be really like strict with it conscious and break the habit and the cycle um yeah I don't know I've tried all those things of like what's the thing is it called brick it's a little um box and you can scan it and it shuts everything down yeah that's a really good idea I have been looking at doing that so almost like as I walk into the kitchen I scan it so all my notifications go off you have to be conscious around your phone because it is an addict it is an addiction I would I would say if you can walk through the door

26:08Zoe Plummer: leave it in the bucket drawer or whatever you've got you know that that drawer you put you shut

26:12Georgia Dayton: the drawer and just leave it alone yeah don't go back to it you'll feel that push and pull

26:16Zoe Plummer: like I constantly sometimes I pick my phone up look at it put my phone down six seconds later Pick my phone up, put it down. It is a horrible feeling to be pushing and pulling around that. So I think it has to come from us in the same way that not having a drink does or not vaping or whatever it is that your addiction is. If that is a real thing for you, you have to be like, right, mindset. This is what I'm going to do and stick to it.

26:41Georgia Dayton: Yeah, exactly.

26:43Zoe Plummer: And also it's really hard when you're saying to the kids, no, you can't have your iPad. If you're then sitting scrolling on your Instagram. It's like, well, I'm such a hypocrite.

26:50Georgia Dayton: I know, exactly. I think you've got to be really strict and then hopefully it just becomes a habit

26:56Zoe Plummer: One more Let's do one more Emotional tips for stepping back from a friendship which you know is all one sided

27:04Georgia Dayton: We talk a lot about adult friendship actually don't we on here I think it's I think it's really difficult but maybe you treat it like a breakup and you have to be strict if it's really not making you feel good and you know it's one-sided you almost just have to do

27:26Zoe Plummer: what's best for you there's a couple of options I think here I would definitely do this first one but that's because who I am and I imagine you might do the second one so here we go you could have a conversation with that friend and say listen this may sound dramatic but I feel like this friendship is really one-sided and for me I need to take a step back from it I love you but just like I'll be back in touch when I can handle it or maybe not. So that is a breakup, right? That feels hard but at least they've got the explanation. Or it's a gone. What would you do? Gone. I knew you were going to say that.

28:04Zoe Plummer: So you can either be G or you can be me in it. Yeah.

28:06Georgia Dayton: And there's no right or wrong way of dealing with it and it's whatever's best for you.

28:11Zoe Plummer: I think it's quite cruel when you don't give that person and an explanation as to why, though.

28:17Georgia Dayton: Yeah, I get that. Like, ghosting a friend.

28:19Zoe Plummer: Yeah.

28:20Georgia Dayton: Oh, God, I'm not saying ghosting. I'm just saying mentally I would just block it off. Do you know what I mean? Like, if you're feeling like it's one-sided, I'd almost just emotionally switch off from it. So then I don't care that it's one-sided. I get it. And you just slowly fizzle it out.

28:36Zoe Plummer: I get it. Good luck with that. Also, maybe, is there a chance to, like, repair it? Yeah.

28:41Georgia Dayton: Or no, there's something going on. That's the other thing, isn't it?

28:43Zoe Plummer: Yeah, I think we're a bit, I think we're probably quite scared to rock the boat. You can say stuff to your partner because you know they can't go anywhere. But with friends, I think maybe we're frightened to say, you know, hang on a minute here. I feel that X, Y and Z is going on. You don't want to come across as needy or you don't want to come across as naggy or, you know.

29:01Georgia Dayton: And I think everyone's conscious that you've got, everyone's got their own stuff going on and everyone feels busy. And this is just putting like a bit, another thing out there. hard though because it might be that your friend is going through something and when you say it's one sided then maybe they're dealing with something you don't know about

29:18Zoe Plummer: also you might have just realised that they're a selfish motherfucker and they don't give a shit about you

29:21Georgia Dayton: in which case you need to cut them off

29:24Zoe Plummer: and gone thank you so much for sending in all of your beautiful questions for today's Q &A as always we'd love you to rate, review, subscribe and please give our podcast a follow

29:33Georgia Dayton: and if you've got any feedback on this episode or topics you'd like us to cover drop us a DM on Instagram we're on at Made by Mamas and we'll be back on Tuesday.

29:53Georgia Dayton: Tonight, I'd like to transport you to Night Falls,

29:56Zoe Plummer: a mystical place where a luminescent waterfall glimmers in a starlit clearing amongst ancient pines. You can join me here every Sunday and Tuesday with a podcast of bedtime stories created to help you fall asleep easily. There's truly nothing more relaxing than a story told by Firelight.

30:17Georgia Dayton: So search Nightfall's Bedtime Stories on your favourite podcast player and gather around the fire for a soothing tale tonight.